Fubar Blog Posts 2

Raise A Son..
Why is it, that it is viewed by majority of society to be a sensitive guy who really cares about his son as a weakness. I have given my life to raising my son as he really didn't have a mother who cared for him or me. I had a wife, an attorney with all the money in the world as she was a corproate counsel for a major drug company who didn't know anything about a child. While there are guys who are only sperm givers, there are females who are only egg givers. My ex. wife had nothing to do with my son. I did all the traditional things that the female does except for a brief time when she breast feed him Even that she did poorly as my son rejected her breast for formuler. As she want him to wait while showing him her breast until she was real. It was the most difficult thing to experience a mother withhold her breast from my son until she was ready. Most men, do not even get up from their sleep if a woman is breast feeding. I would get the bady and set her up in the chair that

80 Raise A Touch Generation Tablet Or Allow Children To House Boy
Peninsula May 8 to accompany learning, to accompany the play, to accompany sleep tablets barato computers, smart phones and other touch-screen devices as if into a children's electronic nanny "of playmates, to occupy the kids a lot of childhood, from birth to newborn surrounded by a variety of electronic touch-screen devices have become a "touch-screen generation". Recently, the Peninsula network this survey, more than half of the users Tucao, play Tablet PC, they have not the 30-year-old child's opponents. Experts warned that premature overexposure to electronic products, or supposed to be lively child into a "house boy". 5 percent of users believe that the touch screen generation "has become a common phenomenon. Tablet PC into children "nanny" father admitted dereliction of duty It is said that as the last century, "80" Cube Transformers growth; "90" is the world of animation NES; Genesis "00" living in the age of computer network "dominate"; children born after the 20

Raison D'être
This is a Fan Page for the CBS show Big Brother 15 Comments will be accepted that are related to things that are happening from week to week in the Big Brother House. If you are a Fan of the Show & a Friend of this page and are silent for a full week you will become a "Have Not" when a new houseguest is evicted.

Raising Awareness
I love that fubar reaches out to people that have suffered from tradegy and to those affected by Breast Cancer. There are other ways to outreach and help other causes as well. What about issues like ovarian cancer, domestic violence, animal abuse, diabetes, and many of the other problems we face out there in the world? As far as issues related to health, the United States is one of the unhealthiest countries in the world putting us at the highest risk for every health issue there is out there. I would love to see fubar reach out to more organizations.

Raising Money For Disabled Family's Medical Bills
A disabled family launched a website in hope of raising enough money to pay off their medical bills. Please visit their site at: http://themackeyfamilyfundraiser.blogspot.com/

Raitings
OKAY!!! Let's get one thing straight...I am not here to boost your rating and give you a 10 if I don't think it desearves one. I am not here to see your tits, your abs or how many hos or pimps you have on your arm. I like to see the real person, not a show....or something creative, since I am an artist. If you don't like my rating then stay off my page as your rude comments really don't offend me it just makes me eager to click the delete button!!!...So, with that said, have a great day!!!! Tina

Raith 7
She: Raith 7, cold desolate Ice moon of the planet Xerus in the Morbus galaxy, 6 langstroms from the nearest human outpost. Unreachable but by the most adaptive starships. Only stacross 5's with the ability to fold time could generate the necessary attitude to break out of the dimension bands that held the boundary intact. So here I am, under the ice flow in the corridors of the reliance and I often gaze into the furnaces and remember the sense of a fireplace or so I'm told. Most memories are programmed so it's hard to tell what was and if there is truth in the dreams I suffer from. It's not appropriate to have these dreams as I am always reminded yet when the mines are silent I drift to places that are filled with light and color. Beyond the steel gray structures of these honeycombed enclosures that have become my bastion of existence with only these dreams that force me to question my choice to align with the company. Day after day the march of us all to the elevators and down

A Rale Condtion
A rare condition A man and woman are seated next to each other on a plane. After takeoff, the woman violently sneezes and excuses herself to go to the bathroom... so the man stands up to let her out. She returns, and 15 minutes later she sneezes again big time, and again excuses herself to go to the bathroom. She returns again, and immediately sneezes, excusing herself to go to the bathroom. The man, a little tired of jumping up so often asks her, "You keep sneezing, what's the problem?" The woman replies, "I have a rare condition... every time I sneeze I have an orgasm." He says, "Oh... what are you taking for it?" "Pepper",she answers.

Rally Racing Baby
You scored as rally. You scored as "rally racing." The second-most watched motorsport in the world takes place mostly on dirt roads, where all wheel drive reigns supreme.rally88%Sport Compact Drag Racing63%Drifting50%Autocross50%Touring Cars38%what geek motorsport are you?created with QuizFarm.com

Rallyin
Yesterday evening was just great. We went to the Rallyin the valley 3 in Staunton. There were lots of beautiful bikes (harleys) and the music and beer was awesome to. I got to hang with my precious sissy and a bunch of our friends. Burning Bridges was a good band that opened up for Shooter Jennings. We stood at the top of the hill while we drank our beer and watched them play. Country recording artist Trent Tomlinson, paid a surprise visit and sang with the Burning Bridges band. At 9:00 pm all the crowd went down the hill when Shooter Jennings came on. That lil guy put on a helluva good show. He sounds so much like his awesome father. Bottom line everything was great. I was with good friends, had good beer, surrounded by harleys, and awesome music. Nothing was stolen and we didnt get lost HA HA.. So I chalk this weekend up as being f*kin FANTASTIC.. The only bad thing that happened was my girlfriend Robin was there and we had some communication trouble.. While I was standing in line I

"rally"
"Rally" please don't cry together again we shall fly you're not alone just far from home stand up tall don't take a fall seize control don't let it break your soul grab hold of the reins as I course through your veins dominate the pains turn them to gains distance restrains only physical domains take aim conqure the war game stake your claim we're one and the same a single candle's flame ours to tame crying out your name my love I proclaim by Jon

Rally Ace Colin Mcrae Dies In Air Crash
Rally ace Colin McRae dies in air crash Colin McRae Colin McRae Richard Rae COLIN McRAE, the former world rally champion, died along with his five-year-old son Johnny when his helicopter crashed near Lanark in Scotland yesterday. Two other people on board, believed to be close friends of McRae, also died. Jean-Eric Freudiger, the driver’s agent, confirmed McRae’s wife Alison and daughter Hollie were not on board. The Squirrel aircraft came down in Jervis Wood near Lanark just after 4pm and immediately burst into flames. Strathclyde police said the damage to the helicopter was so bad that it could not immediately be determined how many people were on board. The Air Accidents Investigation Branch has been called in to investigate the cause of the crash. The Scottish Ambulance Service said its own helicopter was despatched to the scene along with three ambulance crews. Strathclyde Fire Service also had units in attendance at the scene. McRae was one of the most popular an

Rally Champion Colin Mcrae Dies With Son In Helicopter Crash
Rally champion Colin McRae dies with son in helicopter crash Tom Gordon THE former rally driving champion Colin McRae was killed and his five year-old son feared dead in a helicopter crash yesterday afternoon. The aircraft came down in Jerviswood, Lanarkshire, half a mile from the family's home and burst into flames just after 4pm. Jean-Eric Freudiger, McRae's agent, said the 39-year-old driver had been piloting the helicopter himself. Also on board were believed to be his son Johnny, another adult - said by locals to be a school friend of McRae - and another child. McRae's wife Alison and their daughter Hollie, 9, were not on board, friends said. Strathclyde police said in a statement: "Four people were onboard the helicopter," adding "The bodies were found within the helicopter which is owned by Mr Colin McRae of Jerviswood House, Lanark. It is believed he was onboard the helicopter." McRae became Britain's first World Rally champion in 1995. He was one of the country's

Rally Time
OK FRIENDS AND FANS ITS TIME AGAIN TO RALLY UP AND HELP A VERY CLOSE FRIEND OF MINE WIN A BLAST. PLEASEEE STOP BY AND GIVE SOME COMMENTS AND SHARE THE LOVE.....THIS IS ONE OF MY BIGGEST PIMPOUTS....P;EASE HELP HARLEYBABE 69 WIN THIS BLAST

Rally Cry
Ok, now being a recently unemployed history and government teacher I have no one to rally about the upcoming elections so I guess I will just have to vent out my thoughts here. I am not here to give out my points of view all the time. I never did that in my classroom. The only times my students found out my party affiliation was when they asked me point blank and honestly I was never afraid to tell them. I also was not afraid to tell them why I originally chose that party. I always stressed to my students I didn't care what party they went out and voted for eventually in their lives all that mattered to me is that they went out and voted. I am a firm believer that you cannot complain about what the government is doing to you unless you get you ass out there and make your voice heard. My mom has never voted a day in her life. I tell her the same thing every time she complains about the nature of things right now. This is a far cry from my father (god rest his soul) who use to

Rally!!
Rally to save Michigan Film Incentive! Monday Oct 26 @ 7pm The Crofoot Ballroom Pontiac, MI FREE!! Join supporters and members of Michigan's Film Industry as they Rally to preserve the Michigan Film, Television, and Video Game Incentives.

Ralph Once Again
Monday, October 2, 2006 What is right Focus your thoughts on what is right with your life. There is so very much that you have to choose from. Abundance is as close to you as your next thought. A thankful attitude will connect you to that abundance. There is something of positive value in every moment, every situation, every relationship. Zero in on what's right with life, and that value is yours. What you expect has a major influence on what you get. Expect to move forward on this day, and you will. Let the challenges inspire you. Let the possibilities encourage you. Choose to see and to live what is right with life. Whatever may come, be thankful, and you create much to be truly thankful for. -- Ralph Marston

Ralph The Rooster!
A farmer has about 500 hens, but no rooster, and he wants chicks. So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster that he would sell. The other farmer says, "Yep, I've got this great rooster, named Ralph. He'll service every chicken you got, no problem." Well, Ralph the rooster costs $3,000, a lot of money, but the farmer decides he'd be worth it. So, he buys Ralph. The farmer takes Ralph home and sets him down in the barnyard, but first he gave the rooster a pep talk. "I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. "Consequently, I'll need you to do a good job. So, take your time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a chuckle. Ralph seems to understand, so the farmer points toward the hen house and Ralph takes off like a shot. WHAM! Ralph nails every hen in the hen house - three or four times, and the farmer is really shocked. After that, the farmer hears a commotion

Ralph Gets Audited Today...
The IRS decides to audit Ralph, and summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor is not surprised when Ralph shows up with his attorney. The auditor says, "Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no Full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money Gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable." "I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it," says Ralph. "How about a Demonstration?" The auditor thinks for a moment and said, "Okay. Go ahead." Ralph says, "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye." The auditor thinks a moment and says, "No way! It's a bet." Ralph removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor's jaw drops. Ralph says, "Now, I'll bet you two thousand Dollars that I can bite my other eye." The auditor can tell Ralph isn't blind, so he takes the bet. Ralph removes his dentures and bites his good eye. The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Ralph's attorne

Ralph's Irs Audit
RALPH'S IRS AUDIT The IRS decides to audit Ralph, and summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor is not surprised when Ralph shows up with his attorney. The auditor says, "Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable." "I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it," says Ralph. "How about a demonstration?" The auditor thinks for a moment and said, "Okay. Go ahead." Ralph says, "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye." The auditor thinks a moment and says, "No way! It's a bet." Ralph removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor's jaw drops. Ralph says, "Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye" The auditor can tell Ralph isn't blind, so he takes the bet. Ralph removes his dentures and bites his good eye. The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand

Ralph Waldo Emerson
Don't be too timid and squeamish about your actions. All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better. Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. Nothing can bring you peace but yourself. Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm He who is in love is wise and is becoming wiser, sees newly every time he looks at the object beloved, drawing from it with his eyes and his mind those virtues which it possesses.

Ralph The Rooster
A farmer has about 500 hens, but no rooster, and he wants chicks. So, he goes down the road to the next farmer and asks if he has a rooster that he would sell. The other farmer says, "Yep, I've got this great rooster, named Ralph. He'll service every chicken you got, no problem." Well, Ralph the rooster costs $3,000, a lot of money, but the farmer decides he'd be worth it. So, he buys Ralph The farmer takes Ralph home and sets him down in the barnyard, but first he gave the rooster a pep talk. "I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money." Consequently, I'll need you to do a good job. So, take your time and have some fun," the farmer said, with a chuckle. Ralph seems to understand, so the farmer points toward the hen house and Ralph takes off like a shot. WHAM! Ralph nails every hen in the hen house - three or four times, and the farmer is really shocked. After that, the farmer hears a commotion in the duck pen a

Ralph Nader
Ralph Nader for President 2008 June 16, 2008 www.votenader.org www.officialnaderstore.com Obama and the Democrats are raking it in from the big corporations. Big corporate executives, for some reason, like Obama and the Democrats, but do not like Nader/Gonzalez. Therefore, we must rely on you - our loyal supporters. Right turn?After securing the nomination, Obama immediately ripped into absentee black fathers, while kowtowing to the right-wing AIPAC lobby. What's wrong with this picture? What's wrong is that Obama is moving right. He's got the corporate money, the powerful lobbies, and big business in his corner. And he's not looking back. But we have to make sure Obama knows that we are organizing. And will be relentless in pursuit of justice throughout the year. Obama might have the corporate executives and big law firms in his corner. But we have you. And with your help, Nader/Gonzalez will be on ten state ballots by the end of the month

Ralph Waldo Emerson
Finish every day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.

Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882), American Transcendentalist:
I like the silence of a church, before the service begins better than any preaching. We must get rid of that Christ, we must get rid of that Christ! The word Miracle, as pronounced by Christian churches, gives a false impression; it is Monster. It is not one with the blowing clover and the falling rain.

Ralph Carr
Imagine it is February 19th, 1942 Franklin D Roosevelt has just passed Executive Order 9066 (EO). The purpose of the order is to allow for the treatment of people as animals, giving the United States government the authority to round up people and herd them into holding communities in the name of national security. The United States recently reeling from the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor suspected all Japanese immigrats and decendents were a possible threat to the safety and secuirty of Americans. To keep the citizens of the country safe the EO allowed the creation of "Exlusion zones" permitting any person of a certain pedigree from living in a certain area. Understanding the governments justification is not essentially neccessary to our story. The Mayor of Denver during the time was a man of indreible integrity and sincerity, his name was Ralph Carr. His election bid was won on a platform as a politician whose sole purpose was to act on behalf of the will of the people, his

Ralph
Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ralph..'Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!' St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.' Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, Clucking, and pecking the ground. A rooster strolled past.. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'

Ralph Lauren Pas Cher
"The finest clothing made is a person's skin, but, of course, society demands something more than this," so says the famous American Author, Mark Twain.Ralph Lauren pas cher It is no doubt that a person's character is built during a lifetime of ups and downs but a person's attitude and charm that becomes the part of first impression factors is measured with their choice of attire and the colors therein. There are many sites these days offering cheap and discounted clothes like discount Ralph Lauren polo shirts, discounted Gucci apparels, cheap Abercrombie Fitch shirts, cheap designer sportswear from Adidas and so on. The variety to the designer tags in the discounted clothing section is countless and the job to choose from these well sorted cheaper versions of your designer extravaganzas is much fun and convenient at the comfort of your own homes. These fit polo shirts come with various colors so that men can choose their favorite color. Women's classic fit shirt gives versatile a

Ralph Lauren Polo Ralph Lauren Big Pony Polo Ralph Lauren T Shirt
ralph lauren pas cher When it comes to online shopping it is better to choose a business that assures you on the quality standards and offers a return policy within a certain period so that you can inspect the designer cheap shoes for yourself and analyze its touch and feel and durability factors to stand up to your expectations. Most probably businesses that avail a return policy are the ones that can be trusted since they have already displayed the confidence in their products. When you are assured on the quality you might as well forget about spending hundreds of dollars on a single pair of designer shoes in the showrooms and opt for such wholesale or replica designer shoes that allow you to buy more than a pair for a price that is not even close to the price of the original single pair. Besides, designs are subjected to change and so are the trends. What the young group wants now is not just the fashion and styles, but something which actually polo ralph lauren keeps the

Ralph Lauren Polo Rugby Ralph Lauren Home Polo Ralph Lauren Polo
Doing it online gives you the convenience of seeing the shirts so that you know what you are getting and ralph lauren pas cher there are reviews available so you know which sites you can trust. If you choose to look around thrift shops, factory outlets, second-hand stores and flea markets don't forget to make a list of the Ralph Lauren polo shirts which are available, check for the logo and note other things which are specific to these shirts so that you know that you are getting an original at a fraction of the cost. Of course we cannot forget this famous horse logo that has existed for a very long time. When we meet someone for the first time and they are wearing a Ralph Lauren polo shirt, we immediately think of them as being successful and having money with a lot of accomplishments under their belt. Polo Rob Lauren, just like creating the very best in his dresses and other accessories, polo ralph lauren he tried his return hoodies and became quite successful. Hoodies are

Ralph Lauren Polo Custom Fit
For this very reason shopping online is lucrative and much smarter an option for all the designer shoe fads out there. You have a handful of distributors online for designer shoes like cheap Gucci and prada shoes, ralph lauren pas cher cheap puma shoes, cheap Air Jordan or Nike shoes and so on. Wholesalers and dealers of replica designs of these paradisiacal designer brands are quite a few online but to filter out the ones that also lay emphasis on the quality is what you should be looking for. Polo Ralph Lauren , Since 1980. They offer many high quality designs Men's Polo Shirts ,especially Small Pony Polo and Big Pony Polo Shirts .They are not afraid to take romance and classical and mix it in with a hip hop look. Mind you, these designers are not the ones that created the Polo shirt. In fact, the Polo shirt was around long before this name. However, Ralph Lauren is more than likely the name that sticks in your mind. They are the ones that made polo the way it is today. R

Ralph Lauren Polo
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Ralph Lauren Femmes Manches Courtes-167
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Ralph Lauren Home Polos Ralph Lauren Pas Cher
However, the price tag on these extravagant footwear designs is what puts most of us off. ralph lauren pas cher You might fall in love with a certain Prada shoe but end up dejected at the knowledge of its actual cost. Showrooms for designer shoes also have other expenses that tag along with the original price of the shoe. Ensure that you are purchasing from genuine people online, however, there is no reason to be alarmed or alerted because everyone's on the internet to do business they earn the profits by cutting down the extra costs on showroom rent and taxes by doing business online and you are the smart customers who save your hard earned money by not blindly following your other brand addict peers. Actually ,polo ralph lauren We can find that in the society today, many of us are not able to afford to pay the big price for this name brand clothing. You should not let this one bother you, because there are ways to find this at an affordable price. That's right, even if you

Ralph Lauren Pas Cher
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Ralph Lauren Femme
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Ralph Lauren Pas Cher
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Ralph Lauren Homme
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Ralph Lauren Homme
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Ralph Lauren Polo
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Ralph Lauren Polo
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Ralph Lauren Polo
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.ralph Lauren Polo
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Ram
You Were Born Under: Your most comfortable inside your head - and often daydream the day away. You have an artistic temperament that makes you seem creative to some, eccentric to others. You avoid conflict at all costs, and you have a difficult time with relationships. Attractive and with good manners, you tend to shine in social situations. You are most compatible with a Pig or Rabbit. What Year Were You Born Under?

Ramalama - Roisin Murphy
Could a body close the mind out Stitch a seam across the eye If you can be good, you’ll live forever If you’re bad, you’ll die when you die Hearing only one true note On the one and only sound Unzip my body Take my heart out 'Cause I need a beat to give this tune Taking a picture of Taking a picture of Taking a picture of Oh the body swayed to music Oh the lightning glance If I would give it all and all Maybe you would hear me Ask for half a chance Hearing only one root note Planted firmly in the ground Undo my heart, unzip my body and Lend to my ear a clear and a deafening sound Unzip my heart And if I need a rhythm It’ll be to my heart I listen If it don’t get me too far wrong And if I And if I And if I need a rhythm It’s gonna be to my heart I listen If it don’t take me too far gone Everybody smile please Nobody pay no mind to me Finger in position on the switch A little flash photography Taking a

Ramallah
Days Of Revenge These are the days of revenge so sweet. Can you feel it? Can you feel it? There is a fear in the air that I have prayed for, for my whole life. Can you feel it? And do you fear it? And Malcolm was right: The hate that we've sown has come home in the night. So wake up. It's time to die. Can you feel it? Can you feel it? 'cause we've reached the end of the lies: Just take a look at the papers, and your leaders: they're killers and they're liars. See what they do in your name to make the bodies pile higher. The murders and the terror, they've done it forever as we sit back and smile at the script that they sell us. So now they come for me. So now they come for you. We didn't hear and now there's nothing we can do. Holy Mother of Columbine, say a prayer for me and the USA. Blessed martyrs of Palestine, come and strike us down. How dare we pray? Osama is the demon that keeps you all safe in your cells. Believe it. Oh sweet revenge... And Je

Rambling Again
Another fucked up weekend...Stress level is slowly rising to the point of explosion time is near..tryin to keep my cool cuz there are lil ones around...Sitting here wishing there was that special someone in my life..missing the cuddling saying i love you baby...I have been single over 3 yrs...ok Mr. Right where the hell are you...show urself...lol....gettin tired of lame excuses people come up with why they did that or whatever..done venting for the time being

Ramble About Her
I sit here and watch her sleeping wondering if she knows how deep my love runs I can only hope she knows that she is my soul my every reason to breath. i'd die for her, better yet, i'd kill for her! every beat of my heart is to her every breath! everything i do is to make her happy. i dont care how mushy this sounds! i'll scream it through out eternity! i love her!!!!!!!!!!! i love her!!!!!!!!!!!! i love her!!!!!!!!!!!! there's no one better in this damned world! no one can make me stray i'm stuck on her like crazy glue! i wasn't searching but found in her true love i'd die, i mean really die, if she was gone! i feel my chest is about to explode i feel my soul is no longer mine! I LOVE YOU LISA MORE THAN YOU'LL EVER KNOW!!!!!!

Ramblings And Bitching :)
Well I wonder how many people actually read these.... I have a friends list with 130 people on it I hear from maybe 10 of them on a regular basis most of them sent me a request and then poof...nothing.....I hate feeling like just a step on the ladder to the top for someone to get points or ratings...you will find that if I hear from you...you will hear from me....ok granted I haven't left comments on everyones page everyday..or rated and commented all your pictures...but I do have 4 kids and can't always keep up with all the ratings I do try to keep up with it though.... I am so sick of seeing the sexiest this and that on here what about what kind of person they are? doesn't that count for anything anymore? I have known some very beautiful people physically but the type of person they are has made them the ugliest people I know...There is someone on here who is doing a contest for best personality....I think it is those kind of Contests that should grab peoples attention...not the cute

Ramble
what if i dont wake up tommorow.? will you cry for me in your sleep. would u say u never knew me as i pass by you tortured soul i heard you where young and free once the life we had was a strange one but i,ll see you again .. she dreams of monsters.... that come alive in the night a sign saying condemded blinds my sight a rose a razor and finally goodnight . ....by me....

Ramblings Of The Broken Hearted
"You deserve better than me." That's what you told me the day you broke my heart. "How do you know?" I wanted to scream as confusion clouded my thoughts. "You need someone who can be there for you." That's what you told me as I sobbed uncontrollably. "Who are you to tell me what I need?" I wanted to yell as anger began to build. There is a difference between want and need. I want you. I want to feel your arms around me as we lay together, sated, after making love. I want to see your face light up when you smile as our eyes meet across a crowded room. I want to have your lips take mine in a passionate display of how much you missed me. I need to be wanted for my personality and sensuality. I need to be loved whole-heartedly and unconditionally. I need someone who is going to be there when I need a shoulder to cry on in the middle of the night. I need someone who not only wants me but who needs me just as I need him. I love you and I want you. That I

Rambling
sitting here i look around me. at the sky and the stars. i wonder what is life all about. the heavens and the earth. what do they mean what do they stand for. is there a reason for all of this. i sit and count the stars and wish that i could make a wish and it come true with the first star i see tonite but as we grow older we learn there is no such thing as a wishing star and that wishes dont come true unless you work at them yorself. you learn as you grown older nothing is ever easy to get and if it is its not realy worth having or wanting. love is sorta this way you have to work at a realation ship every day that you in one. its 50 /50 . you get what you put into it most of the time. if you put nothing into it dont expect to get anything from it.

Ramble, Ramble, And More Ramble
This is gonna be a huge rambling blog probably...get over it. Why is it that every time I try to fix something in my life...it all goes wrong? It's like I can never get a head and I keep taking steps backward. I hate it and I feel so weak and powerless like there is nothing I can ever do that is good enough. I try not to regret and look at things like this...everything happens for a reason. I'm just tired of waiting for the reason. My impatientness is getting the best of me. Grrrrr. Sometimes I just wish I could sleep my problems away. Its horrible I know but I do. But solving our problems and working through them is what makes us stronger(supposidly) but its leaving me feeling weaker. I can't even relax!! The more I try not to dwell on things the more I do. I can't icnore whats there and what is always gonna be there...or whats not there and never is gonna be there which ever the case may be. Sometimes I just feel soo a lone like no one truelly understands all that I feel even when t

Ramblings
the problem with racisim on australian beeches is everyones already brown or tan....so who do I hit....these were words spoken on the ronnie johns half hour comedy show,My question for this ronnie person is this...why are you such a wanker?ok now lets throw some information out there that IS useful and that you neo nazi assholes can go nuts over.....little tip Christ was a Jewish Man born in the middle east....so He was not white.He's Brown....and oh yeah you jack boot wearing idiots need to remember this as well....no matter how pure you think your white bloodline is,Life began on the continent of Africa....also Brown.so guess wht my mellinenly challenged friends,your idol ....adolf....he was half jewish....again Brown.I am so sick of you fools...ya needed this reality check and I for one who happens to be of mixed heritage....(thats right half my family is Brown)...am most exceedingly happy to give it to you. Have a Gothy day!!!

Ramblings
Im so tired, physically, emotionally, mentally.. exhausted. I dont know how much more I can take. I can smile and laugh with the best of them but really Im miserable. I dont know if Im going to make it for 6 months and 1 day until graduation. Ive got so much going on in my life right now that I cant focus on anything let alone school work. I dont even know if I want to be a nurse anymore. I mean I do.. I think.. I dont know.. I dont know much about anything.. I know I want to be happy. I love my job at childrens. I really could see myself working there for a very long time. I just think Im scared. Im afraid I wont pass my boards, Hell I am afraid I really wont make it to graduation... Wonder if I fail a class between now and then because of my lack of focus. I cant afford to stay in school another semester.. my financial aid runs out in may. I'll be screwed. Im so afraid that my goal is so close but yet I still have plenty of time to fuck it up like Ive fucked up just about

Ramblings
subject: ramblings post date: 2006-10-14 14:28:02 views: 18 comments: 0 ratings: 0 Life takes unexpected turns One door that look so promising slams in your face The next opens and is better than that old rusty ass other door anyways How many chances are you willing to take? Do people who don't take any chances really get anywhere anyways? Do you suffer because of the wrong you did to me..or the wrong you did to yourself? Every time you truely love..is it better than the last person you loved..that is..if you truely loved them even? did you? or was that something else? Do you not do something because you are afraid it will fail later on? What if is doesn't..what if you changed everything by NOT trying What exactly is it that you fear losing anyways Keep your enemies close..... Love.... beautiful never ending feeling of hopefulness.. things will be ok now because you are here Saved me from becoming a person jaded by the ones who hurt me who are "sorry" now..

Ramblings 1
Ok my first Blog. What do I have to say? Well, basically I have no idea. I blame Vicki for my entry into this crazy forum. So we'll see how it goes. And yeah I can blame her, cause she's been a friend since we were wee little things. Shame we don't get to see each other as much as I'd like, but atleast I do get over to her neck of the woods a time or two in the year. I'd write more but seems the young Padawan has decided that I simply *must* help him play Lego Star Wars. ::sheesh::

Rambels In My Mind
if i died, would you notice i was gone? if i died, would you think of me? if i died, would you care? if i died, would you bother to cry? if i died, would your world stop? if i died, would you even remeber my name? if i died, would you fallow me if i died, would you take the time to keep me alive?

Rambling Of Things I Need To Get Off My Chest.
well the past couple of days have been rough. I went to the pharmacy a last saturday because i only had 2 of my antidepressants left. They told me that I couldnt get my prescription filled until thursday because of something about my insuance wouldnt let me get it filled till then or something. So I have had to cut my pills in half. Its been BAD real BAD!!! I have felt like crap all week I cant wait until tomorrow. The lady I take care of's granddaughter took a pregnancy test 2 days after I got back to work from my misscarriage. Its been rough but I have been trying not to let it get to me, but now she is starting all her doctors appointments and reading all stuff about it and is even starting to show a lil and with not having as much of my medication and watching her go through the stuff I would be going through right now had I not lost the baby is really starting to tear at me :( I try and I try and I TRY to move past all this stuff and in a sense kinda forget (I know its nothing

Ramblings
Throwing in my hat into the ring I have some things on my mind that are really bothering me but I'm sure you all really don't give a shit but I'm gonna run my mouth about it anyhow because I can!!!!!!!! I have had and still have the pleasure of talking to people from all walks of life on the internet. I am good friends with some others are just people that I chat with on an occasion. Regardless of how I know them it is always a pleasure and an honor to call them my friends. Now here is what I am finding out from some as time goes by. I have every once in awhile had a debate if you want to call it that or just two friends bitching to each other. I didn't realize that for the most part people from other countries feel that we as Americans are not being told everything we need to know about other countries, not that in mind here was my argument on my own behalf. I may not watch the news because I'm tired of everytime I turn the news I see this child molested or this person killed. It dep

The Ramblings Of An Insomniac
Ok so I'm so bored out of my mind. I just joined this site about 3 days ago and ive met some cool people and i've also noticed how completely moronic some people on here really are but you gotta take the good with the bad right? Anyways I am so damn tired but for some reason my brain doesn't have an off button, hell it doesn't even have a pause button so I'm still awake at 5:33am and i'm so tired that I can barely keep my eyes open, yet when I get in bed and lay down I can't keep them closed. What can I say i'm a girl of many contridictions, hell i'm a walking contridiction. Did I mention I was bored? Anyways this is me being bored, and random and whiny hope you don't mind, even if you did I wouldn't care but anyways, guess i'll try to sleep again even though it's pretty useless considering I have class in a few hours and then work and then homework, gotta love being a grown up eh? ♥Adrienne

A Rambling
I'm not to sure what I'm going to talk about here but I am giong to ramble. Have you ever noticed that sometimes people don't recall that their paretns no matter what love them? I mean really it could come down to them being the only ones who could help you. You shouldn't push them away it only hurts you and them in the long run. Though you may not see it right away it could harm you. This isn't true of all people but for some. Maybe this is all because I am so close to my family. Even through all our differences and believe me whe have had a few. Some really really major ones. Through it all we were there for each other. I am only ranting about this because my friend is having issues with her son and it's hurtful to her. I won't mention any names as it's not my right, I just wish I knew how to make things easier on her. The things he says are hurtful to her and she's a good mother. She has done things to protect him from many harms in life. He sees it at breaking a trust. Howev

Rambling Thought For The Day
This blog is not in anyway directed at anyone, nor is it saying that I don't adore my friends online. I thing each and everyone one of them has brought something into my life..good or bad. These are just random thoughts I've been feeling the past few days. Do you think our lives were more or less complicated before the computer craze? For me I only started using the computer about 5 years ago. Now I can't do without it only b/c of my sites and such. But I often wonder if it's enhanced my life any? SO it has enhanced my life a lot as far as that goes as well. But Not only has it become another chore on an already "too big" chore list of my daily things to do, but it's also taken time away from things I used to do. I know I used to spend more time outside before I started playing and working on the computer. I often wonder if I would leave the house more, if I would read more, and a number or other things more. I seriously have come across actually feeling bad if I don't talk to t

Rambling On And On Like An Odl Man
WHAT YOU ARE A BOUT TO READ IS EITHER REAL OR NOT YOU DECIDE BUT PLEASE DONT PASS JUDGEMENT TILL YOU READ ALL THE INSTALLMENTS THIS IS JUST ...............DAY ONE: BUZZZZZZ THE SOUND OF MY DIME STORE ALARM CLOCK WAKES ME REMINDING ME ITS TIME TO GET MY FAT BUTT OUT OF BEDD WITH A JIGGLE TO THE LEFT I FIND MY FEET ON THE FLOOR HEARING MY WIFE WHO BY THE WAY THINKS I COULDN'T LOVE HER ANDY LESS( JOKES ON HER) ASKS ME WHAT I AM DOING I SNICKER IN DISSBELEIFE AND SAY IM OFF TO MAKE YOU YER MONEY SHE GIGGLES AND SAYS GET TO IT THEN WITH A SMOOCH I AM DOWN THE STAIRS TRIPPING ON THE KIDS LAYING ON THE LIVING ROOM FLOOR..NEVER UNDERSTAND HOW THEY GET THERE TILL I COME HOME AND SEE THEIR BEDS AINT BEEN SLEPT IN IN 3 YEARS.. AHH THE KIDS I AM A FATHER OF FOUR GOT 3 GIRLS AND ONE BOY THE OLDEST IS 12 YOUNGEST (BOSS) IS 6. HEARING FROM THE LOCAL METEOROLOGIST ITS GOING TO BE A BLUSTERY DAY WITH 75 MILE AND HOUR WINDS I PREPARE FOR MY DAY .. THE ONLY THING I LOVE

Ramblings....
Over the last 2 months or so, I have become very interested in this woman. I just don't know what to do. I feel as if I know her very well from talking to her a lot. So, here in lies the problem. She just wants to be good friends. That's all good and fine with me...I just wish that it could be more. Do I push it and tell her so, or should I just remain good friends with her?! What to do, what to do.

Rambling Souls...
A friend of mine had been accused of rambling on his blogs and I had the following in response to say (if you know me, I hate people being unjustly accused -- always looking out for the underdog, I guess): "Oh, puh-lease..... Not a pretty face???? Look again! You might ramble on on occasion, but who of there here on CT bloggers do not??? Some may only post conceived "masterpieces" on here, but even "masterpieces" are only perceived in the eye of the beholder. While you may ramble a bit, it all seems to come together at some point at time. I do enjoy how your blogs aren't always about sex, sex, sex as well. In fact, one shouldn't be punished for thinking outside of the sex box a bit and actually have some intelligent thought process going on, besides just about skin/sex. Blogging is about the pouring out of one soul. There is no real right or wrong way about it. The whole point is about revealing to the world a little bit about who you really -- your joys & concerns

Rambiling
you ever feel like you have all of the power in the world at a certain moment in your life. and you can accomplish some amasing feat of strength and mind. i feel this very often and i can never figuer it out. its like my body is ready for something that has not yet happened. i feel the same way about working out or even when i collected wepons. its like i'm trainning for something but not sure what it is. every thing i has undertones of war in it even the movies i collect are like that. i've always been good at sneaking around, and i'm very good at target shooting. i've always wondered if i should have been in the military in the special fources. i've had ppl say that i should be in the special forces just becuse of my skills. but idk. and if you have ever read any of my other blogs you can deffinatly see what i feel inside. the darkness always makes me feel safe. i hate the light. and i'm so dark that most ppl think im a goth but im not becuse im not absessed with death. i also love

Rambling
I've been working at this walmart now for almost 3 weeks. I have found a lil group of people I am good with. We can joke around and have fun and still work so this makes it all good in my lil work world. I am not as well off with the anagement team here as I was back home but that takes time. They are still thinking of using me as a CSM maybe during the afternoon shift. THat's all good too at least I'll be sleeping with Hank at the same time. I don't mean that we don't see each other but well it's hard when I'm sleeping he's working then vise versa. It works out ok though because we have 4 days off between us where we see a bit of each other lol. So far I like TN though I'm usually sleeping through most the day time stuff it's not to bad. We still have the house up for sale so somebody come and buy it ok? On a positive note we found something we like but again no buying til we sell. This will both be fun to look but irritating because we can't buy right away. Now I'm just whining b

Rambling On About Anythin In My Head... (read At Ur Own Risk)
Im really not feeling good at all.. Mentally or physically.. Im startin to get sick.. So thats the physical part.. Now for the mental.. Are u sure ur ready for this?... Ok here we go... First Ive been thinking about my past.. and basically how i screwed my life up with drugs.. then i think how i wasted time and let it slip by takin everyone for granted thinkin they would always be there.. Until one day last year when My house burned down and my Uncle Jeff died.. Ha Big reality Call.. I lost my life in a matter of hours.. thats when i got really heavy in to the drugs.. I havent been the same since the house burned.. Granted I am Clean off the drugs now But that just makes me Deal with the shit going on in my head.. I miss my son.. I miss my uncle.. I seem to fuck up everything Good out there for me.. I just started a new job.. I hope to hell i can keep it and I like it.. Im falling in love with a Man and Its scaring the shit outta me.. I dont want to be hurt again.. But i dont want him

Ramblings Of A Lone Wolf
I cannot win lately.Between the Damn cat,thee Dog an Insorboardinated teenages,I cannot sleep.Not even on a 100mg.Trazadone.When I do sleep,everything functions around CherryTap + the Covenant.I'm Addicted to this Place,that is for sure.I have been Addicted to many things through out the ages it seems.But first lets address the situation of the purpose of this perticular blog.After many months of haveing the most fucked up computer in the house.It is finally running at 100 % .I know longer get booted for trying to excess extensive profiles.Now my problem is the error messages that constantly appear if I rate things to fast.Or I'll be in the middle of rateing stuff an I must log back in.This even accured when CherryTap was my home page.I cannot rate more than 20 things of 1 friend without being asked to logg out an log back in.When I first arrived here,when it was the LostCherry I was labeled a staulker by BabyJesus.I could not rate anyone past 5 pictures.There was some sort of Covenant

Ramblings At 9 Am
So here I am 9 Am and no bed. I can't sleep, nor do I really want to. My moods have been changing like the music that is blaring out of my speakers...maybe it is the music. Music brings out all emotion to me... I even have a sountrack to my life, certain songs for certain moments...certain songs for certain people....maybe I am insane, but I really think I am sometimes! I can hear it and it will just take me back... Take for example "album of the year" by the good life...that album might have saved my life. I am serious. One night a few years ago ( I believe it was late July 2004 ) I went nuts one night. I was sick of life, I was sick of living, and I was sick of people judging me from a situation which no one knew all the facts and still most dont, and I dont care. I made my decision on my own, fuck it. On with the story, I used to be a cutter, and I quit in 2002 but I relapsed that night, then proceeded to cut off all my hair myself in the bathroom. (the length it is now is from gro

Rambels
Falling Flailing Slightly scared Holding on To whats not there A dream A wish That won't come true In my first reality I was ripped from you Then again As I begin to breathe Memories remind me I took my leave Life errupts In heavy air I jump to grab Whats just not there Familiars Protectors Seem to appear The comfort returns Infront of fear The panther The wolf Watch over my loves My friend And my heart Are watched from above It's presence is here For I am just fine Although I've seen their protectors I've never met mine

Ramblings...?
Drunken talking amuses me at times. Theres always the talk that Oh I'm fat, ugly, so and so hates me, and the I need to get laid conversations. Yes, I was drunk but I was listening. As I'm now sober I do recall the talk I am.. amused, concerned and slightly agitated.. It upsets me to hear someone speak of my friends who I have known for about 10 years in such a poor condescending manner and claim that they love them. I am sorry but if they were really that bad of a person I would have not let them move into my house and spend most of the free time that I have with them. That just doesn't work for me. Then have them say that they were torn about who they should hang with because they don't want to be judged, when they do all the time. People have a choice and a free mind. One chooses who they "hang" with. Weather it be the rich, high maintenance type, or the fly by the seat of your pants be who you are type. The fact is that a single person always has a choice. I think that

Rambling On... About Life And Such!
I just wanted to update a little bit. It has been a little bit of time since I have paid much attention to this. I just got back to Madison today after a week long visit to Bloomington. I stayed with my best friend Amy and her baby and boyfriend. I have some new pics of me and the kid...check them out. We didn't really do much but that was the beauty of it. Just relaxing with good friends and having some great times with that adorable kid! She really makes me want one super bad. I go back and forth with this... do I want a child? Nah...not right now! Are you sure about that? No, I really REALLY want one! I think it all boils down to finding the right father. I am pretty old school when it comes to kids though. I was raised with two very loving parents and I want my children to have the same king of up-bringing that I did. I want the father to be around. I want the child to be created out of love, not out of a passionate accident. However, at this point in my life, I

Ramblings Of In Love
It's 3 AM again and I'm tired but cant seem to fall asleep. My mind is filled with her. Her smile, her laugh, her wants. Is this the torture of love or loneliness? I'm smoking again, what does that mean? I don't like it I just need it, for now at least. I've spent much time alone and much with friends. I've been in too many relationships, some out of want and caring but many out of convince or small faith. I'm not lonely, I just miss my friend who I fell in love with. This is different or so I want it to be. I feel different, things taste different, I look at things differently. If different means better, then my life is better, for meeting her. I suppose that is why I write. I want to trust my feelings though so many times they have only lead me to emptiness. With her I find an inner peace that I haven't felt in so many years. I believe she finds that same peace, but it frightens and confuses her, she has been let down many times before. Days spent without

Ramblin Rover
Oh, there're sober men in plenty, And drunkards barely twenty, There are men of over ninety That have never yet kissed a girl. But gie me a ramblin' rover, And fae Orkney down to Dover. We will roam the country over And together we'll face the world. There's many that feign enjoyment From merciless employment, Their ambition was this deployment From the minute they left the school. And they save and scrape and ponder While the rest go out and squander, See the world and rove and wander And are happier as a rule. I've roamed through all the nations Ta'en delight in all creation, And I've tried a wee sensation Where the company, did prove kind. And when partin' was no pleasure, I've drunk another measure To the good friends that were treasure For they always are in our minds. If you're bent wi' arth-i-ritis, Your bowels have got colitis, You've gallopin' with bollockitis And you're thinkin' it's time you died, If you been a man of action, Though you're

Rambeling On...
Few people know much about me, and I like to keep it that way, If you don't know me ...you can not hurt me. so I'll share just a bit about myself. not enough that you can hurt me. but enough for you to decide if you want to be my friend. 1st.) I Have been, and suppose I still am an abused woman. I married a man who I thought was the love of my life. Only to find out, that in his eyes I was something he could control, own, and baet on at his will, I would always beat back. That is until July of 1996 when he took a metal baseball bat to me and cut me down below from front to back. after 6 months in ICU and a year relearning a lot of things most people take for granted. I walk not well, But I move on my own...I can not run I dought I wil ever run again. Danceing was my love. Now I give new meaning to slam danceing. No it is not the same. 2nd.) I am a mother to a very wonderful but very mixed up young man who is 12, he is the love of my life. I never ever thought in my wildest drea

Rambling And A Poe,
alrighty, here it is. I have been hearing of cherry tap for a while, and now i have finally gone and done something about it, and got me one of them account thingies. alright. that is all i had to say, so now it is time for a poem! if you ever if you ever learned what i have learned, would you know what i know? If you had gone through the same experiences as me... would you act the same way? If you have loved who i love... would our hearts be in sync? No... for i am me and you are you. No one is like me, and niether like you. So live today the way it fits for you. Don't pander to anyone else and put your life on the shelf Live your life and love completely, show the world how you aren't afraid, to be yourself. james

Ramblings,
Well with all my Great Awesome Friends,on the CT.They Rate me to Kingdom Come.I feel as though I'm not holding up my end of the Bargam,of Rating them as much as they Rate me.It is very hard for me to Keep Up. An Thanks to Lady Witch,I have a much better perspective.On many things now.I promise to do better, starting in April.Before my Ramblings lead me off in another direction.the purpose of this blog.I guess the 1st.pt.was the preamble.-------------------------I was Rating last night,Showing love.My Fishing Buddy Ron, Stopped in.I know longer Live near any of my fishing friends,I no longer Legally drive.( another Possible Blog).Ron lives about 30 miles away in oxford,Ma.with his wife Tina,his 2 daughters,Ashley 13 + Jessica 9.I have been Fishing + Hunting with Ron,for over 15 yrs.Actually I was one of his Master Fishing Teachers.An with all Great Students,he thinks he's better than I.bass fishing he might be.U must work to afford Bass Lures so I no longer fish Bass.I could still keep

Ramble
my mind is wrapped in thoughts of you possibilities negativities i honestly dont know what to do at all....im seriously freakin out because im blinding myself from your emotions almost like i refuse to see them or maybe i dont see them....i guess im too scared to analize whats happening or what has happened....why do i keep myself from being happy when i tell myself that i want that more than anything? maybe im waiting around for you to tell me that its ok to put all my effort into it....geezz....why do i keep tryin to push myself towards you yet try to back off at the same time....what is it about you that scares me so much....maybe i should just stop tryin to figure everything out or assume what is going to happen....id much rather just go into something as if its the first time like a broken heart is something ive never felt before....i dont want to judge this on past relationships i want to start something brand new....for once in my life id really just like to be able to trust som

Rambles Of A Fibber
I was in a grumpy, weird mood most of the day and now thinking about it most of the week. I'm not sure why. I guess I just was. I've a restless soul at times. This week is one of them. I've really enjoyed Cherry tap. I've been here awhile. I still want to call its Lostcherry all the time. So why am I writing this? I dont know. I'm bored and restless. I went out to dinner tonight with my sister, her new hubby and his mom. It was fun, good food and such. We tried to go PF Changs but there was a two hour wait. I was the first to arrive so I sat under the Chang horse for awhile. I got more than a lot of comments thrown my way. I guess i'm used to it but still some people....they really are not funny. Since PF Changs was such a long wait (I understand since its new to our area) we decided to go the BJ's Bar and Grill. Mmmm, BJ's. Good food and good thought in mind when one, i.e. a guy things of a BJ. Anyway, its was fun and good food. Right now, at this hear moment I realized i'm rambli

Ramblings On Love, Pain, And Mistrust
Do you ever wonder about the people that never seem to care about others? Yeah I didn’t either until here recently, then today I started on some sort of tirade while talking to someone for this very thing. I promised a blog which addressed what I was talking about since I was getting more and more angry the more I talked about it earlier. So here are my thoughts on the subject, which I freely admit before you begin reading this is unorganized and rambling - I have decided to just write it as it flows not to worry about anything else. Rejoice people now you can see my wicked little thought process - lol. I have noticed that the more I talk to people the more that I see the true lack of compassion that individuals have for one another.. They will trample and stomp upon anyone to get what they think that they deserve, what they feel they have earned so to speak. I am not saying that I do not do this because I do to an extent but not the way that I have observed here as of late.

Rambling Writing Inspired By M.ward & Cat Power
when the wind rustles through the trees i think of your rough fingertips skimming my skin I went to the doctor, I said doctor please What do you do when your true love leaves? He said the hardest thing in the world to do Is to find somebody that believes in you when i feel the warm sand between my toes i just close my eyes and feel your whiskers on my cheek I went to the whippoorwill, I said whippoorwill please What do you do when your true love leaves? He said the only trick I have up my sleeve Is to sing over and over until he comes back to me Very few things feel real to me, just heavy and resistant just to get through the day takes so much persistance the eyes of strangers are so cold, but not as much when it's your hand I hold my childhood moments were so happy, mainly now unless i hold tight, all time does is betray me the ground cracks, and even leaves grow bitter good people always seem to die i think if it was discovered, only bad people could turn back time

Rambling A Little.....
I was thinking about how I could start a blog. The thoughts went through my mind about sharing stories or poems, or saying a little more about myself. For now I will add a little more to let you kind of have an insight to my inner workings. Haha. I am older, but still like to have the young side to me. I love life in general. Not a dang thing scares me. The only thing that really bothers me is if I am alone without a companion. I do have a sinister, morbid side to me. Vampires and a few other things along that order really intrigue me. The Darkness makes me feel at home occasionally, but then too I have my brighter days. I love snakes, which sometimes scares the Hell out of people. I respect the things that are out there that can do a person harm. I also respect a person's wishes if they do not want to go around things like that with me. As far as the cowboy and country side.....when I was younger I chewed tobacco, got under the hood of vehicles with my daddy, and loved

Ramblings
Wishes For A Brother By: Sharon Gay Watson One wish for you is long health and happiness Such that your life will be enriched and fulfilled And may you have smiles and hugs given every day to you From all your loved ones and friends. Another wish is for you to have everything you ever dreamed of And may your birthdays be great and you never grow old And hopefully things go smoothly after retirement But you will be missed so very much! My third wish for you is that you will forever be immortal At least….in my mind you will be that way Through the hurting, the lonely days on the road, and the endless phone calls May you always be near those who you love and care for the most. There is so much more I wish for you But I can’t get it all out on paper You just know that no matter where you go, or what you do There will always be this little short girl out here who cares more for you than she is willing to admit. *********************************************

Rambling ...
My eyes are as open windows Letting in all that may dare My mind is as a blank canvas Ready to accept anything As the painting begins The canvas starts to take form Without the ability to erase The work that has been done But as any artist would know The beauty still takes over Only by the way the eye sees There is beauty in everything It lies in the way you view it...

The Ramblings Of No One Important.
So its 11 minutes after Midnight when I started this entry. I'm Just sitting here, completely out of options. Losing my mind, and simply driving myself more insane that what I already am. I worry bout to much, and find myself in a state I hate to be in. Shit, I think I even made another mistake last night posting something. Oh well, *shrugs* I guess thats simply me. I don't know how, but I did manage to force myself to stay home, and not go waste money on alcohol. Wouldn't have gained me anything but a forget full night. I fucking don't even know why I'm even typing but now an entire 6 minutes later I'm done typing, I think

(ramblin) Death/ Proving Others Wrong
I often wonder exactly what death is like. I know that sounds stupid. Hey you stop breathing, your heart stops and basically thats it. But is it? There is always movies and tv shows where people have death encounters. They see bright lights and see a tunnel with blurry images at the other end of the tunnel. They hear voices calling their name for them to walk toward the light. Now I realize alot of this is fictional B.S made up in Hollywood. But what if it was like in that movie City of Angels. You are dying and you see some person in a black trenchcoat that no one else can see. Then you actually turn around and see yourself lying there on the floor. The reason I wonder about these things are because you actually get to look at yourself. If you could do this while you were living, what do you think you would see? Authors would call it a thrid person point of view. I would like to get a third person point of view of my current life right now and try to figure out where I am headed and

Ramblings Of My Mind!
As I sit barely awake from the night before, I see before me in a 20 inch screen, good and evil at war. There are so many beautiful beings out there just looking for a spark of hope and purpose. Then as if it's their shadow, evil with it's fangs knashing at anything that tries to grow and prosper, hangs on to try and desimate any chance of happiness. I have watched to many beautiful people fall to the pain and horror of evils grasp and I decide to make a stand and claim myself a warrior in the charge of eternal hopes white glow! As I make my lone stand I wonder, will I make this stand alone? Or will I look over my shoulder to find mighty legions of warriors ready to take the fight to darkness door? Either way I will make my stand and if I fall in battle my only hope is that I made at least one difference in somebodies life before my eternal slumber befalls me.

Rambaling
The wind blows with great force The wind blow by like nothing The wind is allways around Yet is never felt Love is stong yet bitter Love is words never heard Love and the wind are in common Illisons a lies to our eyes and ears Illisons are truths We wish to see Love is a illison we all wish to see Love is some we like to feel like the cool air Pain is the hurt we feel for somthing Pain is pleasure for the twisted of minds Pain is the love we never get back Love is the greatest pain wish had Love is the pain we wish me never felt So what is love¿? I can not say what it is I will not say what it is For I do not know what truely is I only long for the day that I truely know

Ramblings.
I've had a migraine for a little over a week now. Yesterday didn't do much to improve that sad state. Being that I'm having such difficulty seeing straight, I've decided that today is a fine day to take off from work. I don't mind overly, as I'm just not feeling perfectly cheerful and/or up to par. I called and gave notice. Some people have informed me that I'm being very inconsiderate, taking a day off with only a little over forty-one hours notice. To this, I shrug and say, "So be it!" I've not had a day off in ages, which is an exceedingly long time and I work at least twelve hours every day, not to mention my commute or the time spent finishing various tasks if it's been terribly busy. Add to that the fact that I've not taken a day off of my own accord since I've been at either job and I do believe my heart swells with apathy at the thought of my inconsideration. In short, they'll get over it. I require today to be mine. I have much I do not wish to accomplish or ponder.

Ramblings Of My Sleep-deprived Brain.
DELTA 18!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry. Had to get that out of my system! 911 was hectic today. I had all kinds of silly stuff going on. It would seem that everyone and their mother decided to become deeply inebriated today. Add to that the fact that several of 'em thought it'd be quite splendid to break into a couple of different houses and threaten folks and you have a day full of hoohas. We had an accidental gunshot wound to a 74 year old man's leg. How's that for fun? I had several life flights, but no deaths! Score for the Kloey! Twas a good day. I met my new EMT. He's a nice fellow. Can't wait to meet his family (from what I've heard, his wife has the most awesome sense of humor!) whenever he gets around to bringing 'em up to the office. Also, one of my officers brought me some chocolate covered strawberries. First time I've ever had any. They were quite delicious! Such plump, moist berries! Fortunately, no one witnessed the red juices coating my lips. The way

Ramblings
Come talk with me and lie Sit next to me and die It is contagious, this disease It will leave you begging, on your knees It courses through your blood, your brain It whispers to you, we are insane Save your worry, hold your fear It is going nowhere, for it lives here It ravages the soul, the mind Blazes a ruthless trail, leaves a wasteland behind Come and talk with me and lie Come sit next to me and die You will feel it, it drifts through the air From me, now, to you, a new throat to tear A lifetime ago, they did rip through flesh so tender Your mind will resist, your very being will surrender The bright shining lies a child will believe The undying agony no one can relieve Come talk with me and lie Come sit next to me and die Never alone, it will take us together Both halves of me, now separate forever It is contagious, this disease It will have you pleading, on your knees It burns alive the blood, the brain It begs a whisper, we are insane Hold your worry, s

Ramblings
Well I have not been able to sleep again tonight. I spent all night sitting here alone in the dark just wondering what's going on in my life is this all I have to look forward to. There is a silence in the stillness of the dark that is almost dethening. It can feel like a haunting call to some thing unknown darkness within us all. It's the place in our selves we all fear most, that little corner of our minds we hide the truths and our fears. Still strangely this is where I find my self more and more alone in this darkness. This void I wish I could escape is becoming my home, it creeps over you like a blanket of ice. This loneliness has become so familiar. "Loneliness It makes memories into ghosts And dreams into spirits. To vague to remember To important to forget. Can you see the screams behind my eyes The pain in my heart The loneliness in my soul"

Ramblings
Slow but steady treading carefully upon the narrowing path Pushing forward as the thorns begin to draw blood It is a same how no one remembers what happened here The sweet smell of the black roses is intoxicating Finally through the maze of vines Gazing upon the great stones and alter Time to begin Candle set Insence set Book open Stars above From behind the alter steps a man cloaked in black His blackened wings fade between the folds He has come but for what He lights the candles and insence Cast the circle Awaken the guardians Climb forth the stairs through the gates of hell Taking back all once lost Returning to accept fate Knowing the task all too well

Ramblings
well, it's my first blog and i don't really know what to talk about.....hmmmmm.....well i'm new to cherrytap, and i must say, it's must better than myspace. i love it here! i feel like i'm home! i have met a few way kick ass people on here already! i guess that's all for now;) adios people!

Rambling To Myself...
It's occasionally amazing to me how my brain can just run off without me when given the right motivation. I am not real sure why I am writing this tonight, just trying to sort out some feelings, and trying to figure out if the confusion is only in my head, or if it was purposely put there. I occasionally jump the gun when I feel cornered or fearful of being hurt. I want to put walls up all around, so high that noone could possibly get in. But I know in my heart that that will only delay the inevitable pain of loss. They say that we can't miss what we have never had, maybe, maybe not. I don't know that I miss what I want, but I have a great desire for love and truth. Preferably in the same package! Seems like when I find what might be what I'm looking for, there is always some unforseable obstacle. Well today that just doesn't even freakin' suprise me! A dear friend told me though to continue trusting until given a reason not to! So I will, atleast for now...

Ramblings Of A Tornado At 421 Am
Firstly good morning to all the insomniacs here and those with shit on their mind like me at this ungodly hour of the morning lol! This is just me rambling my thoughts in type because they weigh heavy on my mind tonight. Not only am i stuffed up, sunburnt and had to go check the office for a suspected burglar (false alarm) but am wondering about my life too. Why is it that someone with 10,000 friends can feel so insecure in herself sometimes? Perhaps its not me that im insecure in, it's the relationships i form with others. I myself hold myself to the highest degree of being straightforward and honest with EVERYONE! I am not and have never been the female version of a player on this site or in real life. I expect that honesty from everyone who engages me in conversation, friendship or otherwise. Perhaps im naive and thats why it hurts me so much when i feel i am being decieved by anyone. Its so easy to play games with a person's head and heart here and as "tough" as i maintai

Rambo Reincarnated As Five-year-old!!
Boy, 5, subdues rabid fox to protect family KINGSTOWN, North Carolina (AP) -- A 5-year-old boy grabbed a rabid fox by the neck and pinned it to the ground during a family cookout, protecting six other children until his stepfather could kill the animal. "I wanted to protect my little brother," said Rayshun McDowell, who battled the fox in the front yard of his home Sunday in Kingstown, a town about 50 miles west of Charlotte. The fox bit Rayshun in the leg, but the 61-pound-boy held the animal down for more than a minute. Animal control officials said Tuesday that test results confirmed the fox had rabies, which is fatal unless treated before symptoms appear. Rayshun is undergoing treatment. "I looked out the window and Rayshun had the fox by the neck and was pushing it into the ground," said his mother, Shinda Linder. "I couldn't believe what I was seeing." Rayshun's stepfather, Ryan Thompson, pulled the boy off the animal and kicked it. A neighbor fired a handgun three times bu

Ramblings Of A Crazy Redhead
I wrote this some time back and when I read it the other day found it still as hilarious, so read and enjoy! Well the latest installment in "THE LIFE AND TIMES OF THE NEUROTIC, PSYCOTIC, HOMICIDAL, SADISTIC SEX-A-HOLIC." I have sat down and looked at classes for the summer session and pre-recs for Cardiology Tech school and decided my class schedule...hopefully! It should be interesting to see how I deal with being in school with all the little teeny boppers, Ricky Rednecks, and Elmer Hoe-Handles. I am hoping that bail will not be required! In addition to the stress of being back in school to start a new career, I am going to be living with Pop which is an amusement park ride of its own. Now onto a new rant...I am quite amused by the fact that since my last post those that used to hang around me have once again come out of the woodwork. I do appreciate the contact but due to the fact that I am not Catholic, I don't feel guilty for trying to take care of my own well being. I lov

Ramble Ramble Ramble
It is no surprise to me that hardly anyone tells the truth about how they feel. The smart ones keep themselves to themselves for good reason. Why would you want to tell anyone anything that's dear to you? Even when you like them and want nothing more than to be closer than close to them? It's so painful to be next to someone you feel strongly about and know you can't say the things you want to

Rambles Of A Crazy Woman
well I am somewhat settled in my new quarters. also was able to hook the net up on my lap top. been very busy with moving and sorting out drama in my life. although I have the net back, does not mean I will be around as much as I was before, namely due to the fact I have to pay off some bills, very big bills and thus will be working a lot more than usual. tell you what though, right now I am really not in the best mood. I just very recently discovered that one of my online friends has been lying to me. and I hate to say it but it really does cast a foul light on all my online friends. makes me think, well if that one person can spin such a lie, who else of these people I speak to online are lying to me. I suppose I have lost a little faith in the online society. I just think that, portraying a false image of your personality, lifestyle or even physical body to the online world is worthless, it will not get you anywhere and all it does is feed your mental problems. we need to rememb

The Rambo Granny Of Melbourne , Australia
The Rambo Granny of Melbourne , Australia Gun-toting granny Ava Estelle, 81, was so ticked off when two thugs raped her 18 year old granddaughter that she tracked the unsuspecting ex-cons down . . . and shot off their testicles. The old lady spent a week hunting those men down, and, when she found them, she took revenge on them in her own special way, said Melbourne police investigator Evan Delp. Then she took a taxi to the nearest police station, laid the gun on the sergeant's desk and told him as calm as could be: "Those bastards will never rape anybody again, by God." Cops say convicted rapist and robber Davis Furth, 33, lost both his penis and his testicles when outraged Ava opened fire with a 9-mm pistol in the hotel room where he and former prison cell mate Stanley Thomas, 29, were holed up. The wrinkled avenger also blew Thomas' testicles to kingdom come, but doctors managed to save his mangled penis. The one guy, Thomas, didn't lose his manhood, but the doctor I

Rambles..
So... I ave a habit of being rather blunt.. I really do try to be upfront with things I say to people.. or so I thought.. One thing is for sure.. I will answer whats asked of me.. as long as its a direct question... Anyway.. i really should of just kept my mouth shut.. Cause I've added more stress to someone that I care for and don't want to stress out.. All I was doing was being honest... and maybe just trying to open his eyes a little.. Maybe I shouldn't have.. I don't know.. The fact is.. believe it or not. I have people that care for me.. Some more than others... some more than I think they should.... And.. I slipped and told one of those people.. that... well... as much as I feel for him.. I had been seeing others.. on occasion.. I've never done well with long distance relatonships.. And I'm the type of person who needs the person she's with.. around... a lot.. I've apologized and apoloized.. but still don't think I havent done enough to make it better..

Ramblings
Late night ramblings spew forth onto this page, ranging from happy to sad from joy to rage. They rest here for I can think of no better place, they must be released somewhere or I'll carry them in my eyes, my face. They are the moments when I feel that I must share, that overcome my senses with emotions that are far from rare. The loneliness of the night can be found, by reading a poem or two that in this forum gained sound. Words written upon my heart, released in need they had to depart. Better am I for letting them out, although for most they have their doubts. Beautiful words written not beautifully arranged, they come from a mind that is a tad deranged. For those that understand you are in my thoughts, for those that don't it's a battle you've never fought. Judge me not by the whimsical moments nor by the tireless need, instead judge me for who I am by all the good deeds.

Ramblings For/of The Mind.
It was a great weekend. I didn't get to do what I wanted which was to go to aa festival in Boise, ID. I did however get to relax and get some much needed work done. This was the first weekend in a long time that my husband didn't want to go to Twin every day. I got to see my daughter and granddaughter some on Sunday and that was great. It was one of the best times I have had with them for awhile. No smart ass comments from the teenager and no uptight moments with my kid. I think they are both at a time in their lives where I have to be careful with what i say or it is either taken wrong or I stick my foot in my mouth. I seem to do this with a lot of people lately. It is not intentional, it just sort of comes out that way. I hate to have to make amends to anyone let alone family. But I get to do it alot lately. Oh well, age does not always bring wisdom. Sometimes just more determination to control and be right. Today I will start the work of merketing my new job. I

Ramblings
dear blog, i'm writing in you today, possibly out of boredom. i feel like i have so much to say. i've been doing a lot of what you might call soul searching and i've found out quite a bit about myself and...that i dont really know myself at all. i have so much building up inside of my mind...i want to spit it out...i just wish i could stick my finger down my throat and force vomit out all of my inner...turmoil onto the keyboard and let it seep through all the letters and numbers and really sink in. i need to get in touch with the version of myself that knew how to say what i wanted to say...without tripping over small obstacles like my tongue. i feel so much in limbo...that i cant see or feel whats going on around me. its like being drunk with your eyes closed. you know whats going on around you...but you cant react to anything, and you dont really understand why. so maybe most of what i feel or think gets lost in translation, or maybe i just dont feel like explaining

Rambling
I am a very spiritual person, a person of faith. I believe in the Divine. Some people call that Divine; God, Goddess, Allah, Buddha, The Great Spirit. I don’t think that part really matters. What does matter is the belief in something greater than myself. This belief makes me strive to be the best person I can be, to make my world a better place. The way I do this is, I treat myself, and all that I meet like the Divine beings we are. I f one believes that we are created in the image of the Divine, and that Divine lives in our hearts, in our minds, thus in our bodies, we ourselves are Divine. I feel if we treated ourselves and others with the RESPECT we give our Gods and Goddess’s this world would be a much better place. Now I am not preaching, not telling everyone they have to do this. This just is my way. I want everyone to see the Divine in themselves, in their actions, in their lives. If we do this, and treat ourselves as such, we are one step above the muck. I want every W

Rambling From My Trip To Washington
June 28th, '07' 12:33am morning of the 29th We had to get up way to freaking early this morning due to the fact that mom & I had to be in Layton for some more tests. I was so exhausted cause I could sleep to save my life last night. Well we finally get to Layton and mom takes the Volume they gave her for the MRI tests. So it made her pretty loopy, which is good considering she is claustrophobic. When we get there; we sit patiently in waiting room waiting to be called. When we finally get called up to check in, the girl tells asks what we are doing there. So, I showed her the paperwork we were given when appointments were made. She again looked at me and said you two aren’t supposed to be here till tomorrow; even though our paperwork said this morning. Wouldn’t have bothered us so much if Layton wasn’t almost an hour away and the lady wasn’t being unruly. The nurse gave me my Depo shot so that an improvement on my attitude. She also rescheduled the MRI tests for us. They took mom

Ramblings Of A "con" Mind
Last week i was in Indianapolis for a convention with my sons. It was crowded, like normal, and i was struggling to keep my wits about me. I was surprised at how much control i was able to keep given the number of people. I really think my wife was expecting my brain to fry with that many people. Anyway, i did ok. But it wasn’t the crowd that had me distracted, it was the crowd. I found myself people watching again. Now ignoring the usual “someone here is a Superspy, wonder if i can find him or her” type of silly mindgame (which can be hysterical, and helps explain the strange behavior of some that you see), i found myself watching the interactions more closely. You have to understand that i was in the “Exhibit Hall” (a fancy term for Dealers Room, where everyone makes their money at these con’s). Hundreds of merchants demo’ing and selling their stuff to thousands of people milling about trying to get rid of their useless money. Lots of confusion and chaos. In particula

Rambling
Have you ever told someone something that you regretted as soon as the words left your mouth??? Then that person tells someone else and then you are completely screwed??? How do you go about fixing this? Do you let it go and just let everything work itself out??? I guess that is what happens when you think you have complete confidentiality with a person. I know...just keep you mouth shut and this won't happen. Right?!?!?!?! Apologies to all

Rambling On
So new,exciting,dangerous...wanting you..needing you with me..inside me..wrapped around me.Your touch,smell and taste..my addiction.Thoughts of you filling my head as you fill my body..never enough..always more..forever my addiction.The sound of your voice moves me..soothing the fire you make inside me..as the thought of us together fans the flame of burning desire..pleading need..absolute love..my addiction

Ramblings Of The Day
yeah this is going to be either a long or boring blog . perhaps both .. who knows Im really loving my job .. Im meeting all sorts of nice people .. getting out of the house more . and to boot getting some cash ! wohooo ..gratned its not all that much but hell . its more than i had before .. Im only taking on about 15 hours a week .. as there are 12 girls splitting the shifts .. I work tomorrow from 1-5 . and then have off till Monday nite .. when i work 5-10 .. Tomorrow I head back to the hospital for more tests . Oo yeah Vampires will be attacking me from every angle .. and then i get the joy of waiting on results .. Well I guess thats about all for now . wasnt too long . just boring I guess .. so .ya'll got off pretty easy this time im gonna head to bed and see whats on tv . Ive actually been able to sleep again which is nice .. its strange actually sleeping thru the nites Anyway I hope you all have a wonderful day tomorrow . and if I dont get on here before I go to w

Rambling Thoughts
I am such a fool for love, I tend to do stupid things in the name of love. I always put my heart and soul into everything I do. I'm looking for someone who will call my bluff, and let me get away with little things at the same time. I want someone who is passionate and will hold my hand, even when I'm mad. I want someone who will kiss me in the rain, and expect nothing more. I want to be appreciated and respected. I need that. I need passion, not only for things I'm interested in, but I need someone who is passionate about their own interests as well. I need to be happy, and feel safe. I need someone who will encourage me to get up and get out, take me for walks, and tell me I'm beautiful, and actually mean it. I need someone to love me, all of me, every little inch of me, and every aspect of my life. I need someone who will be happy coming in a close second to my son. I need someone who understands that. I need someone who calls me at 3 am, telling me they miss me, or they were thinki

Ramblings Of A Destroyed Heart
Two years have passed... two long years.. and six more months to go.... my brother sits behind bars because of two people he though he could trust and turned out that they stabbed him in the back... my hero sits behind bars because he trusted someone and they screwed him over.... he sits there because he was nice...... no one understands the pain... no one understands the tears... no one really understands anything... i cry because i miss my hero... i cry because i hurt for him... i cry because i dont have anyone to turn to right now... i cry because my rock is gone... i cry because i am mad... i cry because i am hurt... i cry..... i cried for what seemed like hours on monday when i had to look at him and say bye and hug him knowing that i was walking out there and he couldnt... i cried because he is my big brother and yeah he made his mistakes but he is human... my hero sits in that place day after day and it kills me to know this... it hurts me so.... i wish there was something i cou

Ramblings
it is 1am and can't sleep! i am so excited that in about 9 hours grant will be graduating from Basic!!!! And of coarse you now what that means.....HE WILL BE COMMING HOME!!!! And the pressure of trying to find a new place to live, and having all my kids in one spot! life seems to be taking yet another turn, ya know. One of those unexpected, but much needed ones! not sure yet where it is gonna take me, but since i am a strong woman, i'm up for the challenge. guess i have babbled on enough, gonna flip through some channels, read a book...somethin to take my mind off of everything! much love and bright blessings to all of you!

Rambling On And On.
Ok so here I sit with so much on my mind. So here I am again. My mind is so unstable right now, its just crazy I still stir crazy. reition repeats its self over and over and over and over. Nothing ever changes. I swear one day I will leave, But Im still here. I just want out. I cant take it any longer. Since before when I was just random with no job and everything was the same. Its gotten worse, now I have had a job for 9 months and counting. 6 months were good, Now they cut me off from the world, placed me in a little cube attached to this head set monitored every second im there. This happens daily, repition repeats its self getting worse over and over again. I hope to find that one and only perfect guy.. I do this over and over. and over and over I fall get crushed. Getting worse everytime over and over and over. So Im deciding Im going to leave. This repition is not goin to win me over. Im going to break this ball and chain that hold me forever stuck in this hell I

Ramblings Of The Criminally Insane
Dr. Laura (Grrrrrrr!!) is an overgrown PLACENTA. Seriously dude...she is a vomitous mass of social distortion. Here is an example of her elusive "common sense" matters of the mind: Husbands need sex, and it's a wife's job to provide it - as much as he wants, whenever he wants it. So contends Laura Schlessinger - better known as Dr. Laura, the ever-provocative radio-show shrink - in "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands." She further instructs women to "Get over yourself and under your husband. Make love no matter how YOU feel" If your husband is upset, it is because of something that YOU did. YOU are the bad wife. The Marriage failed because YOU didn't try hard enough. He hit you because YOU didn't do as he instructed. She is PRO-Slavery and Anti-Individuality and women should submit their every thought, movement and action to their husbands. Yet she is the most HYPOCRITICAL BOWEL MOVEMENT I have ever laid eyes on. Why am I having this beef with Dr. Laura you may ask?

Rambling Stone
Once walked only to be What just seems to be real Though just thoughts that Ramble with words to ones self. Take heed to the rose her beauty Is not match to her wisdom for just Her thoughts I could not match Are carved in stone beneath her... Just the site of her eyes that peirce This darkened soul that once held The devils door sealing only fire That once raced through this heart... From freedom is released as new light Is scattered across this opened plain Do you not see her this bright Wonderful flame her heart once noticed.. Can the only cast a flame which was Ment for me to wipe away this darkness That has shredded my soul. From years past just to open heavens gates Above her halo and let me breathe in the pains Of only my truest broken heart. I have seen her once in a dream She walks with such grace..... Her halo is of the purest goodness she Keeps hidden under a robe of beauty.. Though I another demon only wanting To

Rambling
What do you consider a loving,healthy,happy relationship? I am having a really hard time with certain things at the moment. I want to know how other ppl feel about relationships and what makes you happy in one. What is happiness?? What makes YOU happy just in general?? How can you find yourself when you've been lost for so long you forgot who you were as a person?? How can you get rid of the overwhelming feeling of lonliness?? Oh well maybe one day I'll find the answer to these questions....Until then I'll keep searching.

Ramblings Of A Mad Mother
I find myself often disappointed by men, both now and in the past. This could be taken one of two ways.....either my expectations are just set too damn high..or they are just "shit bricks" in the end. I'll just run with the latter. So I, being a single mom to a fine, upstanding young man who is my 12 year old son, am determined that he will never be considered a "shit brick" by a woman with high expectations...when he is grown. How you ask??? Well I am soooo glad that you DID ask. Guilt is my primary weapon against him. Hey!!!!! STFU!!! It keeps him sensitive to my needs. I am performing a public service because one day, my son just may take your daughter out and you will thank me because he wanted to talk about his feelings instead of trying to get in her panties. "Son, when you grow up, it is unacceptable to have a credit score lower than 700" *Insert sons tolerant eye roll here* as he regretfully asks me to explain. And I dutifully do. "Son, if you have sex before you

Rambling .... Come Down To Me...
I'm beebopping around today and when stuff it hits me I just kind of chuckle out loud and grin to my self... it's all bitter sweet and... Hmmm.... life's roads are just amusing...the thought to ponder... instead of growing from bad relationships... why do we let them keep us stagnant... allow them to have the control to hold us back and be so damn cautious.... JUST LOVE!!!!!!! Yeah sometimes crap hurts but you rejoice in all the goodness there was... in the fun silliness you had and the passionate moments... hold on to those and let the bad go... know better for next time... but don't go in thinking things are doomed to fail.... look at me... maybe I should follow my own damn advice... Somehow after my divorce I found myself again... the bits and pieces I left behind and lost for whatever reason... and I get to crushin on this guy and I throw up every defense I have... from faith, kids, to whatever, I become distant and pull away, and most of all I ASSUME he can't possibly feel the sam

Rambling
Have you ever been afraid of whats next? Right now I am deathly afraid of whats going to happen once I go back to the United States with my boyfriend and my relationship. When I look at him its hard to fight back the tears. One man that I finally gave my heart to, it scares the beejesus out of me. I don't want to give up hope because it is something I truly believe in, my biggest fear is that he will give up. He has his business now and everything is going great for him, I dont want him to feel that I am a burden. I havent brought this up to him because I am scared of the outcome. For those that are new friends, I met my bf online over a year ago. This is my second 3 month stunt in Germany (he has bought the tickets and supported me both times). What can I do to make him REALLY SEE what he means to me. I swear words just arent enough anymore....

Rambling
Finding friends... We all come online for our own reasons... some for attention, some for companionship, some for cyber sex {NOT ME!!!!}. It fills a void somewhere in our lives. Why I'm online, well that's a combination of reasons... I get lonely, I like making new friends and staying in touch with old ones as well. I've run into a few friends from other sites, but that happens when you've chatted for a while. As well as, people I've traveled with and been friends with outside the internet. I won't say no to meeting for coffee or a walk in the park :) to talk and find out you are the person you've projected yourself to be. More often than not you find that some like to play games and be something they aren't online. So be it. Friendships are important to me, I do truely care about the people I talk to and associate with. I don't have much use for liars and people who try to be what they are not. We all make mistakes, we all have blessings and faults... If you ask for m

A Rambling
with daylight fading landscape changing we settle with what we got tickled by emotion Rampent with commotion we struggle with our train of thought we lick our wounds we pay our dues always trying to make someone happy but still we strive and continue to revive those who make us feel crappy Forget the day and continue to say ""It's me i should worry about"" cause if you don't live for something you will die for nothing one thing you should never doubt

Rambling
every time I try to do anything I get 20 questions. Why do are most of your referals men. why this why that. im just so tired of always being questioned for everything i do. Is it wrong for me to try and get ppl to join the best site on the internet. the greatest place to hang out??? can anyone answer this for me????

Ramblings Of Thoughts...
i cant even begin to verbalize how i am feeling right now, but i can try. i feel so alone, so lost, so numb, and yet so emotional. i hate my life, i am so depressed i can't stand it. i have this feeling in my stomach, this constant unsettling feeling. it's always around, especially when HE isn;t. like i need something, or someone so bad, i cant take it, idk what i need, but i need it so badly. im going to break soon, any time, idk when, i cant predict it, but its going to happen and its going to be a disaster. i hate that i am one of those girls that get so wrapped up in a guy she can't live without him, or feels that she can't. coz thats how i feel about my ex. damn i hate that i have to call him my "EX" that's probably the saddess thing in the world, coz he's the only thing that ever makes me feel comfortable. when i am with him, i'm ME. I am happy, i am alive, i am complete, i am loved. I need love. i need to be held, i need to be kissed and i need to be told i'm beautiful. bu

Ramble On
As I sit here at work rubbing my knee that is killing me I got to thinking. What if I had never served 10 yrs in the Army? What would my life be like with two legs that would allow me to run and do all the things I have missed over the years? I know I am happy that I did serve and thankfully before Dubya came into power. I voted against him both times and do not regret it. My only regret is that I found out that the boy I thought was my son wasn't. If I had it all to go back and do over again I would do things exactly the same as I did the first time with one exception. That exception would to be at my parents house the night my sister was shot so that she could still be with us today. It's not often that I actually stop to think about things or hash them out but after seeing a friend of mine get hated on for bashing Dubya I think it's time I start speaking out on how I see things. on a final note here I am thankful that the elections are coming up and we will have a new presi

Ramblings From Stupid Redneck
The preacher today was talking about iraq today and how it was splitting the country in half.Well if we look at it he is right.We are fighting between ourselves all the time, Kids killing kids, gang wars. American terrorists trying to bomb state buildings and setting fires to start mass fires. Well i believe that is what the Terrorists in other countries want us to do. So when they come in we are already fighting among ourselves they can just take over. But i might be wrong they might not be that smart then again u never know with peopl now days. let me kno what you think and if you dont like just flip to another section. By the way im just a dumb redneck.

Ramble
...If something you never knew you had dissapears, do you miss it? I think i'd love you if we never even met, my heart would have felt those same butterflies, but, without cause, it would even have felt heavy on a sunny day. When is the right time to let go? When you say you let them go, truely let your self be convinced you actually had and then you find other things but still they aren't gone; what now does that mean? How do you know which things, which decisions are mistakes and which "mistakes" are just the ones that are simply making you that stronger person u need to be and getting you where you need to go? When is the right thing to you actually the right thing? And even more importantly, how can you tell when it's not??

Ramblings...about Lounges...
I just found a cool lounge...called World Rock Radio. Awesome DJ Mystic 777 she had played some awesome classic rock! And then, I had found out the right bands to the right songs. :) I felt like a duntz...but I got 'er done...and requested away... Go check it out, if you like that kind of tunes. :) Have a good blessed night!

Ramblings.
Sometimes I wonder why... Why people choose to be as they are. Why I choose to be who and what I am. Why others look down upon each other. Why people have expectations of one another. Sometimes I wonder When... When will humanity cease to be as it is and has been. When those who can not see the big picture will become enlightened. When those who put more value in they're ego will be humbled. When I will find more of which I seek so desperately. When my words will mean something. Sometimes I wonder where... Where will I find that which I seek. Where others get the insane ideas about life that they have. When reality will sink in that were all stuck here. When the truth will be known by all. When my time on earth will actually end. Sometimes I wonder what... What will become of me. What the hell you people are thinking. What inspires humanity to be so ignorant and conceited. What fates and circumstances I shall once again prevail over. What fate will b

Ramblings.
Mental Illness And What It Means To Me. Mental illness assures me that I'll sleep well knowing it can only get worse. Mental illness fills my world with colorful and delightful friends and associates. Mental illness gives me the courage to fight on, because I KNOW I'm going to be victorious and end up Supreme Executive Dictator Of The Universe. Mental illness keeps me aware of those around me and those around me aware of me. Mental illness is the best thing that ever happened to me, for now I have an excuse for totally uncalled for, purely idiotic behavior at any given moment. Mental Illness Be Praised! R. Seaverns Dec. 20, 2005

Rambling
rambling i love you. i love to hate you. i miss you and i cant stand to be around you.. you raise me up and you break me apart.. and im all the happier for it. i want to be a better person for you. and you make me believe that anything is possible for you. like some kind of crack fiend i need you more and more. and what i have is never enough.

Ramble On
I have been sitting here for like 20 minutes now trying to write something. I have all these ideas in my head, but I just can't seem to complete the thought and make it all make sense. The writting bug has gotten me again. I grabbed and pen and paper and jotted a few thoughts down but nothing comes of it. I wish I could find my book I used to write in with all my poetry in it. I has been missing for years now. What I wouldn't give to see it again. And no, I am not one of those girls who write that sappy love poetry and stuff. Mine was a lot darker then that. I think maybe when I get off work in a bit and go home I just might sit and grab my notebook and work on the book I have been trying to write for like 5 years now. I should do it while I have the urge to do it. I just wish I had a better writting program on my computer at home to use other then wordpad, but oh well. Its better than nothing I guess.

Rambling
hey. you know you're comimg alive once again from your months off as a dead person walking when you're in a book store and instead of passing by the cute boy at the counter with tears in your heart you spin in circles looking for something to buy just so he can "check you out" or so to speak. an excuse to go to his register. and then instead of walking out of the store like a zombie, ready to go home and be sad about something (anything) you suddenly realize your worst fear of the day is walkingthrough the door and praying the alarms dont go off. like you had stolen something when you didnt. then all eyes are on you. and you never enter the store again the same way. ok. that was random. up late thinking. goodnight.

Ramblings
Ok so this is my first ever blog so please bear with me. As I wasn't sure what i was supposed to put in here i thought id check out other blogs and see what they were about. There seems to be 2 kinds, one a kind of emo diary of how everything is so unfair and the world owes me a living but really everything is against me and the other is opinions on events or just random thoughts on subjects. As i don't think the world is going to end just because someone said the latest album by my favourite band sucked, even though everyone else in the world knows it was just rushed out to meet the record labels contract, and the hurt from the comments isn't going to make me want to kill myself, I'll go with the 2nd type. I mean seriously what is with kids these days. I mean when i was 15 or 16 my biggest worries centred around was i going to be able to get drink on Saturday night, did someone have fake id, could we find some old drink to buy it for us, etc etc. Yes there was the normal teenage

Ramblings Of Death And Birthdays??
My mind rambles this evening. Mulling over the past, the present. Just wishing things had come out a little differently for everyone I love-including myself. Warm summer days in Yosemite covered in dirt and hoping for bears. Sewing. She made the skirt I wore when I graduated high school. It now lives in my dresser and is back in style. Years of munchies keep it in the drawer. LOL Her dieting roller coaster... Watching the 1st man walk on the moon in her bedroom on the black and white tv. The garden she could grow and the one I can't. I kill everything. Pumpkins, blackberries, apricots, carrots, tomatoes, radishes, corn, peas, and did I mention pumpkins? LOL Everywhere pumpkins... Couldn't get rid of them. LOL Our Christmas tree with no lights one year but a spinning wheel that changed from blue to green to red and the last color I forget. Spray snow and stencils. Hand made ornaments for the tree we made at our table in our tiny house then. Easter when I got the Nancy Drew

Ramblings?
Maybe...maybe I just want to express...to vent.. to get it all out..but damned if I cant. Nope, locked it all up tight, shoved it down deep inside & no one can pull it free. Suck..sometiemes..to be me. Pain...it's life. Joy...if yer lucky.. Loyal? Always & forever. Just ignore me - dont worry about reading this...why? It doesn't make sense...and yet...at the same time...it makes perfect sense doesnt it? I need my Hunter. I'm not complete.

Ramblings In My Heart
Before I start I will warn you, that this may not make sence. As most of you know Steven has been ill in hospital, some know the extend of illness, some dont. We were at the hospital today and after talking to the doctor, he pulled my ex wife to one side and had a talk to us. He tiold us we have got to stop hiding our emotions and dont been afraid to tell people how you feel and the full extend of stevens illness. Steven has Stage 4 Seminoma Testicular cancer. Stage 4 means that it has spread to other other organs, at present it has effected Stevens Lungs, Kidneys and brain. He had brain surgery 6 weeks ago to remove cancerous tumors from the brain, at the time we were told it would give him at least another year or 2 onto his life, unfortunetly the tumors have returned again causing him to have seizures, which are a lot worse than when he first had them before the surgery, each one lasting approx 30 mins, and has left him paralised in his right arm and today he started to lose m

Rambling About Nothing
Ok so lately, things havent been going very well. Health wise, and guy wise. But most of all, im all stressed about my 2nd semester of college starting. As a lot of you know, i HATED the first semester, i am soooo unhappy there. I was alone all the time i cant stand it. And now this semester, im getting my own room. I know im going to shut down even worse then before and have no one to talk to at all, so i will probally be on here more often because i have no life and im scared and i dont know =( I just wish it really could just end. Im all nervous and my ulcers are getting worse and gahhhh i cant take it V_V

Rambles
How can I feel like one man controls my heart? How can I pretend to smile when I feel like I am dying inside. When I am the one that was childish to begin the fight, yet he is the stubborn one that won't let it end. I know I am a hug baby, its only been a little over 24 hrs since the fight begun, yet I am so not a fighter. Right now I am feeling like a part of me has died. Trying to sleep it away, but that doesnt help, it just makes the nights longer and more miserable. Have you ever felt like a puppet on a string? Like one individual controls your destiny and it is not you? Sure I am able to write into my destiny, but I don't feel like I control it..... Said to much.... Sad songs always make me cry.... ====================================

Ramblings Of A Retired Mind
I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can't afford one. So, I'm wearing my garage door opener. You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn't like me anyway. I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans! I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is 'when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.' I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age, and call it "Pumping Rust." I have gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when your chest is falling into your drawers! I know, when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" Just once I want to say, "No, it's for company!" Employment application blanks always ask 'who is to be notified in case of an emergency.' I think you should write, "A Good Doctor!" Why do they

Rambling
I find myslef wanting to die. The light that burns in side me is slowly fading away.. Crushed and broken i lay here in pieces... Wondering if its all true.. The things i am told.. i want to believe. but i cant see it so i dont know what is real anymore... trust has been mended on my end and i want to be loved again.. fully and totaly. Can you? will you? maybe some day my stars will grant me the wish i wish tonight.. for now im going to close here and rest my crazy mind from all of this worry..

Ramblings
LOVE... Ok we all know this has to play a factor in anything...you have to have the ability to love....yeah yeah puke it up on that word....LOVE....hahaha had to rub it in one more time....If you aren't ready to want love then you shouldn't even be looking...life to me goes like this...You are born...you are raised to learn how to grow and accomplish things...you fall in love you have children and you start the cycle all over again with your kids....Love should be something sacred something that is going to last a lifetime...yeah I know it doesn't but that is because people are shallow and don't look deep inside of what they need to be seeing...I have a very kind and giving heart and it's not to play with or be stomped on...so if you are a game player and like to be a dick...get off my porch...I know your type and had the game played on me many times...I look deep into a person's soul..into their eyes and find the inner person and what I am looking for and well so far...I found ONE.

Ramblings Of A Confused Mind
So i sit alone in the dark wondering what it is i do wrong. What has caused the pain that they have brought to my heart. I gave everyone of them my everything. My Heart my soul my very being but still nothing but heartache in return. The light has faded from my heart my soul consumed by the darkness. I no longer feel. The warmth of your skin is lost on me i am numb. closed to the world just as the world closed its self to me. Played time an time again. They felt no shame to remorse for the injusticess that they did. They stole an lied and whored them selve to get what they wanted. all i wanted was love an a warm smile. Some one that cared to hold me when i cried. But i all i got was black cold embraces that took from me everything. Leaving only a hollow man filled with hate with rage with nothing but pity for the world that now surrounds him.

Ramblin
WORDS, SILENCE, AND A BROKEN HEART. What is is about words? You need words to speak You need words to write Without words...we could not communicate. When you get picked on at school... The infamous "sticks and stones" riddle is chanted.... Sticks and sones may break my bones but names will never hurt me. And why is that? They can't be thrown at you.....they can't break your bones! Maybe you see a not so god review about yourself And you tell yourself.."they are just words..they don't mean anything" The amazing thing about words? They CAN be thrown at you They CAN hurt you.... they CAN break you! You live by words, you learn by words. Some say actions speak louder than words....and that may be true Yet words hit you with a stronger force and have a deeper impact. Without words we would be lost We cling onto words like "love" "trust" "friendship" "forever" They mean so many different things to so many different people So why can one simple word brin

Rambling
Have you ever just loved someone so much you feel as if you'd give anything to make them happy? Even if that meant you had to tear yourself apart? Right now thats how Im feeling. I would do anything to make him happy and I thought he knew that. I've even considered moving out of where I am now cuz he doesnt like the living arrangements Im in. And right now I dont have to worry about anything by my daughters needs and my phone bill. If I move out Im once again responcible for everything which I dont have a problem with but I know with my job it would be really hard and would put a lot of stress on me. But if it meant him and I could be happy I would do it. Hell Ive even agreed to put up with things I wouldnt deal with from most people. I still havent figured out how he did it but he has totally stolen my heart. And that part that makes it even harder is hes also stolen my daughters. She just adores him. Every time hes around she goes straight to him, once she realizes who he is

Rambled Jumbled Thoughts
im just going to use this potion of my profile to place little thoughts, writings and nonsense.Just whatever is in my mind at the moment. so here is what my scrambled thoughts are creating today. Boredom Its twists around my soul, like a hangmans noose strangling all interest in lifes little television show. Thoughts twirl though a demented mind pushing past clouds of maniacal depression A self imposed prison? maybe. can this wall of tears be dried? will i ever know true laughter again? what is wrong with me? does anyone have the answers? Sometimes I think only I hold the key to unlocking this door of pain I created

Ramblings...
Well I have all of my grades back for the semester: A in Advanced History of Alexander the Great A- in Advanced Civil War and Reconstruction B+ in Advanced American Foreign Policy C+ in Spanish 003 Total semester GPA: 3.26 So lets see... after being diagnosed with cancer and suffering a "brain injury" in a car accident my semester GPAs have been: 3.36, 3.84, 3.39 and 3.26. I'm either really lucky or school is just not trying anymore. In other news, home has been fun so far. Out almost every night getting into all kinds of trouble, the way life should be. I probably start working this week and they're way behind so I will be working a ton of OT but at $15.36 an hour and double time... I will be making an ass load of money. The next step? World domination. Happy mother's day to everyone out there... we owe those broads a lot.

Rambling
What is love does anyone really know? I am not sure as to the answer but I can offer my take on it. Love is not a feeling or an emotion it is the embodiment of two people who "know" each other. In order to love someone you have to open yourself mind, body, and spirit, allow an individual to truly know who you are, how you feel, and where you are headed. To often in life the word "love" is thrown around and causes grief, anger, and sometimes even hatred. That last part brings up an interesting topic how can love breed hatred, it is my belief that "true" love can not and it is only when someone allows their mind to interfere with the true meaning of love that hatred can be spawned by love. Love is something that comes from somewhere deep within a person, and it is not uncommon for love to be a part of a completely plutonic relationship, love has no boundaries, it only knows what is true and honest. Love is when you can look at someone and say something without even saying a word, or when

Rambbelings Of A Mad Man
if i swore i loved you its a lie,wrords can never exspess, this feel ,my hart gets high,the sparks that fly,so sweet kill, 2 harts collllide,my words rambbel,i try my best,loves gamble,im all in ,let love begin SH 2008

Rambo
Yay Rambo, it's been years since one has been released, and it wasnt out long enough for me to catch it in the theatres. I was on call, then just didn't find the time. So I rented it last night. It started out pretty slow. Stallone someohow overacted by not saying a thing. When he finally meets the missionaries, he was a mumbling mess. Rambo is making a living finding snakes and fish for an exotic animal show, or something like that, somewhere on the border of Burma. A missionary group shows up, and they want Rambo to take them up river to Burma, so they can do their work in war torn Burma, which is controlled by an evil General. Stop what you're thinking. You aren't getting an Oscar winning script here. It's bad enough Stallone tries to put in a moral thought in it. It works decently, and you have to get him into the war somehow. So of course, he brings them upriver, because the one woman talks him into it (women are wiley, even Christians), and away they go. He s

Rambling
The pain swells deep in my chest a suffocating guilt that i can not suppress it burns my heart with every breathe that i take it's what i deserve, a consequence to the choices i make a scorching absence of a trust now lost resulting from a heart...that aside...i tossed...

Rambling Schambling Dambimg Huh...
Know what, I'll tell you what, I miss blogging. I used to blog all the time and now I basically just post quizzes and randomness. Sooo now I am actually going to blog about what has been going on in my life. Cool shizz. Ready, set, go. Ok well first off, I am uber pissed at my brother. Why? Well he drank all the coke and here I was fixing to have myself a rum and coke but there is no coke. So now I have to have a rum and more rum...which is good yet not as good as what it could have been. Secondly, ok now I know peoples and I like to think that I am "friends" with quite a few of these peoples. Yet what the hell do you do when one of those girls who thinks she is your friend but you secretly HATE her wants to hang out? Like I can't keep blowing her off forever (eww that sounds dirty.) Ugh. Like Jess, girl, we were friends 5 facking years ago. Get over me already! What else is annoying me you may ask? Well I will tell you! People who take my car, drive around the facking city an

Ramblin'
i want things to go my way...who doesnt l think if i want to go to camp in the middle of the night i’m gonna...i’m the person that you can call for anything i got it you can have it i dont own anything that cant burn down to the floor that i’m gonna give two shits about...i will go fishin’ all day and not catch anything...and be happy why is it so hard to get a boat in the water...why if i’m in town is nobody there but when i get home everyone calls to see wgere i am...i’m the person that hates a big deal being thrown...about anything...if you tell me something it wont be repeted unless the info. hurts someone close to me...dont give me shit about my family i’m related to them...i know them and i dont need people thinkin’ i can do shit about it...dont put down my friends or family the only thing in the world that will make me knock the teeth out of your mouth is that shit...dont tell me gossip it deserves a slap or two also...if i stay home and dont visit people or dont call dont give

Ramblings Of A Woman In The Crowd...
OK...here it goes..for those of you that don't know me...I am mandi...I am a medical assistant and work for a medical group that does disability exams and we see regular patients as well....As I set here and ponder upon life I stop and think...Is this what I expected out of life...I married young and it has been about everybody else in my life except me...It's time to take control of my life and claim it for myself... I would like to take the time to thank a couple of people on here for being great friends...and thank you to the new friends...I have met some pretty interesting people on here and I have really enjoyed their company and phone calls...I know this isn't like the other blogs...Some leave funny blogs some leave crazy blogs...this is the ramblings of a woman in the crowd...I have noticed some crazy things going on in this world...I was setting alone with my two boys one day in walmart in McDonalds...the boys wanted happy meals so I allowed them to have them...as I set t

Ramblings
As I sit here pondering recent tragedies I can feel unshed tears fill my eyes More broken hearts Lives torn apart A lil more hope dies nobody hears my cries. I'm a hollow empty shell of the wide eyed inoccent I once was. No longer deluded by the dreams emptying my last light into my son hoping maybe he can be one of the few who changes what this cold cruel world has now become. Like me it was once filled with life & light now we only survive to protect our kids with them as our last grain of hope that they'll be better than us. That they will breathe life back into us. Maybe I hold on to the hope so I don't have to feel guilt for being a selfish bitch bringing a child into this world that i've long since given up on. Maybe it just hit too close to home. One of my greatest fears is that someday i'll be getting that phone call or police on my steps telling me it's my mom or worse yet my brother. For both have had a tendancy to drink & drive. Too young he was. We're losing too many of our

A Ramble In The Brambles - Sorry A Mad Ramble At That!
“It looks like you had a prong shot in the dark,” said the blackbird to the bramble berry who was uncomfortably perched. It was ripe, black and shone in the sun as it rocked back and forth in the breeze. “You cannot be on a very good briar!” he pointed out from his comfortable apple tree branch. “Ah, well it is because I am not in fine nettle after last night’s winds. I seem to have a thorn in the side at present.” “Well sorry, it was a bumpy ride last night,” remarked the bramble bush with not only a prong stuck in its leaf from the battering he was subjected to by the aforementioned gales but he also had one of his thorns lodged into his supporting fence and it held him prisoner in a firm manner from which there was no resistance. His final insult to injury though was the sprinkling of blackberry fur all over his leaves, which itched worse than nettle rash and he had experienced enough of that having self-cultivated himself in the biggest bunch of fine nettles ever known.

Ramblings Of A Brilliant Idiot
Funny how you feel something that makes no sense and the worlds supposed to try to understand. But when those feelings are mine I'm an ass for having them. What the fuck do you mean I got what I wanted, No your wrong I lost what I wanted I wasted time I was living a lie. I didn't grow up wishing for a divorce, or having my life strung through the courts, how can you say this is what I want. Come on really you think that cunt I guess it's my fault, wow, I can see that now I did you so wrong, Oh yeah, How? you laid around the house got treated like a queen bitch you didn't work I bought you everything. There's that other part you know the one where I'd try to talk, you'd shut me out, like everyday you were more interested in what Flav r Flav had to say or whatever else garbage was on, fuck it you should be glad your gone. I mean so sorry didn't mean to interupt your Next Top Model or your Flavor of Love, your right t

Ramble Much
So yeah, i'm hella bored and somewhere inside of my messed up head i thought it was a bright idea to write a blog about nothing at all. You think i'm joking but i am sincere when i say that if you read this you will be wasting vital seconds of your life. Tell ya what i'll be nice and give you a chance to leave this blog so you can go do something productive. Ok go on.... . . . . . . . . . . Well forget ya'll too! Ahem, well now that i'm talking to myself let me just say that my buttox itches. I wish something excting would happen right at this very moment. I want some M&Ms. I dislike you in all likelyhood. I was just kidding with that last one. Or maybe i wasn't. I miss the old transformers cartoon. I'm curious if i can still put my foot behind my head but i'm scared i'll get stuck. I think i have way to much time on my hands. I'm bored as all hell, but in a good mood for some reason. I feel like singing right now.... so i will. Sappy love song ''Come wit

Rambling I Suppose
what i want and im sure what every other girl wants in a man and the same for what a guy wants in a girl(or guy what ever ur choice) most ppl expect one to say "i want a guy/girl thats tall/thin built/small and has money" yeah well thats all fine and dandy if you want a superficial self absorbed brain dead person as a bf/gf. not i. i want a man thats caring,honest,trust worthy,dependable,open hearted, a comforter,a protector,my best friend as well as my lover,a great personality,sense of humor,knows when to be serious,loves kids, communicates on the regular basis COMMUNICATE COMMUNICATE COMMUNICATE cant emphasize that enough (that i can COMMUNICATE with at all times) even if its just to talk about useless everyday things youve got to communicate or you have nothing a guy that calls me by name and not baby and sexy all the time someone that respects me just as much as i respect them someone that loves me for me that can separate online life with REAL LIFE and not

Ramblings From A Sleepy Mind
This past week has been one for saying goodbye & welcoming home . Tomorrow will be a week ago that we got the call about Glenda. It’s still hard to believe she is gone. On the happier side of things, my uncle who has been away from almost three years came home on Wednesday. I’m really worried about Mamow. Glenda always called Mamow when she got to her truck after work & was at Mamow’s house on the weekends. I’m afraid Mamow is going to grieve herself to death. Mamow was already in bad shape. When I saw her today she had tears in her eyes when she was talking to me. Daddy mention Thanksgiving today & how he was going to do it. My heart sank in my chest. Glenda always brought the turkey on both Thanksgiving & Christmas. Mama & I both agree that the Holiday will seem like something is missing from now on & there will be. Glenda will be missing from them & from the other get together. As I looked around today at all of Daddy’s side of the family here for the welcome home party for Uncle

Rambo Debuting Monday August 11th
Click on above banner and come on in to the Texas Music Mania for a whole new experience!! :D Come give RAMBO a warm welcome! :D Hiring all staff!!! Let me know if you are interested! Created by DJ Devine ~Owner @ Texas Music Mania~FuLuv Bomb Squad Asst Officer~ All 4 Drama Free Zones ~

Ramblings Of A Broken-heart
Perfect imperfections haunt my memories Such wondrous flaws I grew to love Make it so impossible to find hate Hate which could set me free How much I anger that I cannot find rage But only the rage for myself Can the honest lie to ease the pain? Such a hideous soul My soul left empty Empty in despair with nothing but shadow A darkness which consumes my heart Endless unsatisfied thoughts plague my mind Nights which leak into my light of day The world is again cold and desperate The only happiness I've ever found Is found in one who cannot give One who now gives to another Another who deserves what he gives More than what I, myself deserves It was easier for him Easy to move on and forget Forget all the promises I guess I just never was that important He made me feel worth it though Special enough to engage Engage in a promise which was meant for a lifetime A lifetime which is now desolate A lifetime forgotten, abandoned Along with all your memories Memories

Ramblings
IVE DECIDED TO GIVE BLOGGING ANOTHER TRY. I HAVENT DONE ONE IN AWHILE. IM HAVING A REALY HARD TIME THE LAST 3 WEEKS IN REAL LIFE. IVE BEEN SICK ON AND OFF,AND IVE BEEN TRYING TO FIND A JOB, AND HAVENT HAD ANY LUCK. I KNOW SOME OF MY CLOE FRIENDS HAVE NOTISED A CHANGE IN ME AND IM VERY SORRY FOR THAT. I LOVE YOU ALL AND I USUALY TALK TO YALL ABOUT EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE,BUT I HAVE MY TIMES WHERE I KEEP STUFF BOTTLED UP INSIDE ME TILL IT EXPLODES AI GUESS THATS WHAT IT IS GOING TO DO SOON IF I DONT GET IT OFF MY CHEST. I KNOW I CAN BE A GREAT GUY AND EVERYONE LIKES ME AND EVERYTHING,BUT IM HUMAN I HAVE MY FAULTS AND 1 OF THEM IS IM A HUGE FLIRT. MOST OF YOU THAT KNOW ME KNOW THATS THE TRUTH. I KNOW I DO THINGS AT TIMES THAT HURT THE 1`S I LOVE AND IM VERY SORRY FOR THAT,BUT ITS JUST ME. IM NOT TRYIN TO HURT ANYONE AND WOULD NEVER PURPOSLY HURT ANYONE,BUT IT JUST HAPPENS. IM SORRY TO NY AND EVERYONE THAT IVE HURT JUST REMBER I LOVE ALL MY FUBAR FAMILY!

The Ramblings Of A Mad Man!!!!! Not Really But Sounds Cool.
What is it that pushes us foreward i sit here in class wondering why i fall for the deceitful tricks i usually fall for.. I try an try again yet fail to no end, yet i can't stop doing what i have come to know an do repeatedly sure it hurts but it's a pain that i'm used to. A pain that reminds me i'm still alive an i still have this weak heart that just wants love. but i have it in some way some shape some form. i have always made time for those i care deeply for just seems it doesn't get returned...which sucks in turn but its ok really. I'm becoming stronger i have priorities goals things i must complete motivation to move forward things to look forward to people i want to see hug an spend time with... you know who you are i wont name nay names LINDA!!!!! lol doubt you'll even read this but eh you know i just never know since your so busy all the time geeez lol. but im happy a bit mislead at one point but i'm back on track an happy once again. Sure i'm being teased vi

Ramblings Of A Sleep Deprived Angel.
What happens when it fails? When you still have no idea where to start looking and no one to turn to for help because those that know think one of two things either A: think the idea of you ever finding the woman you know as the one, doesn't exist. Or B: Smile at such a silly notion thought up by a young man with an imagination too big for his own good. People constantly tell me there is no such thing as perfection. I should tell you...I'm not looking for perfection. She wasn't perfect by any means, but she was mine... This is the part of the show where I start to think too much...yet again. Is it wrong of me to miss something that never existed to any of you? Think of me what you will, but for two years I was in love. I wish to feel what it's like to be in love with someone I can touch. Someone I can hold. Not just someone I have to dream about because that's the only way I could ever get to her. And of course none of you know what I'm looking for...I could however give you

Rambling...
Ya know they say the best way to get thru anything is by talking about it. I dont think i believe 100% in this saying, id say maybe a half truth. Sometimes talking about it can backfire and then before you know it you've given others ammunition to use against you at their will. Maybe every once in awhile we have to say fuck it and just say whatever we want because why does it fuckin matter anyway right...it will always be something or someone. Life is not changed until that very second where thought and action would not have mattered or made the difference. Only we have the say in all decisions we choose to make and we are ultimately what it effects...it is up to us to be what we can be proud of and that never will be gained until we no longer consume ourselves in our surroundings but rather what we surround. Thx 4 Reading

Ramble, Ramble.
It's hard to keep my reality in check without help, but the assistance just spoils my good mood. I enjoy this fantasy of mine. I find it hard to convince myself it isn't right. I'm giving it time. I can wait. I can keep my wits. I can last. I think. Should something else come along, I won't turn it away due to some dream. I don't think anything will, though. Everything I want, right there... Perfection. Unattainable ecstasy. Mon Dieu, we would be so good.

Rambling
Battered Broken Brused Used Tossed aside Forgotten Rejected Over Looked Nothing Special Unpretty Fat Useless Fearful Heartbroken Never more then the good friend Feeling of being alone ever growing. So calm on the surface While I break down on the inside Your so pretty your such a good person I would love to have you If only we were closer I really like you but........... I'm just not wanting a relationship........... Hey guess what I have new girl friend you should meet her............... Sighs little things . The little things are what hurt anymore. I can't wont be that anymore. I wont put myself out there again to be shot down rejected turned away over looked. I don't want to hear about HER. I don't want to hear how I'm such a good "friend". FUCK YOU! I'm tired of thinking of other first. Time to put me first for once. Call me what you want. Don't talk to me I don't care. I'm no longer the door mat, no longer the fail safe.

Rambling
so lately a lot has been going on pushing me towards the edge. i seriously have very little sanity left. Usually when i get like this i just want to be alone. But lately, Ive noticed that when I get like this theres a certain person i run to. Even if he cant make it better.. its like talkin to him makes it all okay. Its crazy... I feel like when my world is crashing down. Hes right there making sure Im okay and lettin me know that hes right there if i need him. I can honestly say if it werent for him.. Id be a huge mental wreck.... So basically I just wanted to write this and let him know how much I need him and how greatful I am that hes in my life!! Hunnybear... Ur the best! xoxo

Ramblings To The Dead
a dark shadow filtered through the night haunting pounding through the soul through the deadly silence bringing with it's demons of terror but the need for something more something deeper and meaningful a love hiding in the trees perhaps behind the veil of death suffering a thousand deaths oh the horror she has seen that's almost too much for my mortal soul to take yet i can't let her go though i seem to afraid to find her to bring her to me yet time and time again i try to push past the fear and hold on so tight that her touch will brush against me and her face will come to life a few brief moments let me know she's there that she cares always for me yet still i lose mysef falling further and further away from her each year beginning to run away yet longing to run into her arms begging her to hold me yet running to others less pure less pain less truth hell is in her eyes and fire in her heart yet i cannot bear to know her suffering if only to free her and free my own soul from th

Rambling"my Whirlwind Emotions
MY DARK WHIRLWIND EMOTION" I have a hard time sleeping at night, and sleepless nights drives me crazy . It made me think of so many things, past , present, future…memories, good and bad, beautiful, and ugly ,people who had been part of my life, unfulfilled dreams, visions for the future, my hopes and dreams ,things that I passed through, and possible things that may happen, trials that may come……ahhhhh! People that I care and love much,my family, my kids , my family back home and friends,all the people that I know, and shared some memories, oh, my kids how there were born, how they made me happy, how they made me cry and tired, and my husband, whom I know for 19 years,were so close yet were so far ,seems were miles apart, or maybe its me who is far, my strange , cold feelings, that lost of love and passion, that has invaded for years. it was the least expected things, but it strangely happened, it was so beautiful when I was falling in love, but oh, how ugly it is when one is f

Rambelings/ December Day
Winter Day Category: Writing and Poetry December 08 It is a gray day; fog covers the distant view of a lake just over the bern the gray doom embrace the puter silver of the water, never touching only a feinted caress it reminds me of watching smoke reflect in a mirror, and seeming to disappear within the reflection of it's self like the mirror, the water will inhale and the gray will absorb into something greater, and while I watch the demise a birth of new appears on the near shore across the fog lake soup, pointed green forest, from the shrinking fog, inhaled by lake; the mythical forest begins to remove it's shroud to unfold the forest not so prime but nor is it evil, it is just mans attempt at ecology on a minor scale while the lake gobbles the fog and the warm air removes the chill of the day. There is a still in the air tonight, it warmed to around 40 fahrenheit here in OKC, 411 degrees short of book burning. Chinese I believ

Rambling N Stuffs....
Ok friends thought id do a little rambling and talk about what a fun and relaxing weekend i had. Friday i went to the movies with a friend and seen Madea Goes to jail and yes it was hilarious folks so i definitely suggest you see it if you get the chance. Saturday me and another friend decided we'd take the kids to see Monster Jam in Springfeild which is a monster truck and motorcross show and that was pretty fun. When i was a little girl my daddy would take me every time they came to town so it was nice to be able and experience it for the first time with my own children. Sunday I decided to have a couple friends over and we cooked a big meal and just hung out and talked about "the good ole days'. I think we must have spent the entire day laughing and joking, my stomach and side's still hurt. So what did ya'll do this weekend? Any wild and crazy stories you'd like to share? Thanks 4 Reading

Ramblings
Life , regrets, Have dones, and not yets Holding back, when needing to let go, overanalyzing, not letting emotions flow, Life’s about the risks you take, not trying to find the safe bet to make Ok Ok I’m not buying it either The inner me, The one I think I should be IT’S TIME TO TAKE A BREATHER What’s wrong with knowing Where your going Wanting to know just what your doing Love Life Happiness, Just what are we pursuing? Does it ruin that so called “leap of faith“, if knowing before you jump You won’t land on your face So what if no one’s there to catch you if you fall Just hit the ground running No need to crawl

A Ramblin' Reveiw O'er Specific Amendments
Does the Bill of Rights remain in effect today? I’m not convinced that they are and below I’ll look at the four particular amendments we were requested to investigate and comment on my personal opinions whether or not they are or are not still in effect through cases existent as well as personal. Looking at the specifics of the 4th Amendment, those particulars that state “the right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated…but upon probable cause…” interests me mightily. Currently in this state, Arizona, a police officer does not need a warrant nor even any reason beyond a desire to do so, to search the contents of an individual’s vehicle, which most definitely is an ‘effect’ (property). With the passage of the 14th Amendment and the decisions of the Warren Court, such would seem to be the case and thus the illegality of such searches, such intrusion into the private property, the ‘ef

Rambling
Today was the first day of a perinatal nursing conference I'm attending for work. We started out with the most difficult part first-bereavement and helping patients who had lost their precious babies. As part of the lesson, three sets of parents came in to talk to us for 2 hours about their stories and their entire experiences with the loss of their children. Reading about how to care for people in these situations is good, but nothing prepared me or taught me better than these familes did. One thing that a father said really spoke to my heart and I don't think that I'll ever forget his words. He said: "If you think that it's better to be politically correct than to hold your patient's hand and cry with them, then you don't need to be a nurse and you should just quit now." Wow, what a profound statement. It reminded me again why I am doing what I do. To help people when they are at their weakest moment and offer some hint of comfort, even though a lot of times there is

Rambling
Just recently I hit what I thought was a road block in my life. I wondered if my life was really going in the direction I wanted it to. I questioned everything about myself and my life and realized something... I am OK! I am who I am... That is not a bad thing. Like I said in my last blog, Love me, leave me, or both! That hurt that you feel way down deep in your stomach does go away eventually. I have felt it before and I am sure I will feel it again, but it will not stop me. I live my life every day to the best of my ability. That is all any of us can do. Sometimes people want to be a part of it and sometimes they don't. You know what I have learned about people walking out of my life... That is just an opprotunity for others to walk in! As long as I am thankful for the ones that have been a part of our life and I learn from them I will become a better person for having had them there. I am a better person than I was before and everything is going to be okay.

Ramblings
It's been a while since I've posted something that said I didn't have anything to say. Mainly cause I don't have anything to say about not having anything to say. Somehow I could see this becoming a vicious loop. I'm not going to put a lot of effort into this, as you can tell. I'm mainly typing now so I look busy at work. I get a new office soon. If I still have my job. I'm bored. I'm moving this weekend. You guys don't really care. So I'm gonna find friends who do! *sobs*

Ramblings ...
I started this as a test for another user but got rates, so feel I should add something more substantial. But then I forgot. And I looked at my previous blogs and really only have the same thing to say, over and over ... we all would do well to get over ourselves. Me included. So, here's my word: you are responsible for your account: your password, your security, the images you post (even privately), the people to whom you give access to your pages, your thoughts, your feelings. I can't even count the number of people in the last few months who come to the support lounge asking for help with "hacked" accounts or "stolen" pictures. Neither of which we can do anything about. If you post a photo anywhere on the Internet, if you even email a photo, or share it in any way, you lose control over its further use and distribution. Unless the photo is copyrighted and you have documentation from the Library of Congress (which isn't that difficult, really ... tho it may have a cost associate

Rambling Again
Here I go again getting all philosophical or just babbling, take your pick. I am sitting here just drinking my coffee and as I often do, I sometimes reflect on past and recent events that occur. Today is Sunday and am ending a 4 day weekend, much deserved after working a long stretch. Have I done much. Not really. I cleaned, which was much much needed, thank god. I ran errands, still have some to do, but that will have to be squeezed in somehow another time. But for the most part I chilled. Today I do have plans to go and visit with Dad and watch a movie. Mom is in the Philippines, she has been gone almost a month now and haven't made it over to see him since I work so much. Sad I know, really that I haven't been able to make time for family when I work so much. One thing that was slightly different this weekend is I finally got to meet a friend after 2 other failed attempts. He is a really nice, sweet guy and full of energy. Did I mention goofy! Perhaps we'll get to meet up again a

Rambling About Weirdness
well let's see...hmmm..idk what to really blog about..lol i'm laughing at my boyfriend playing his xbox game while he's talking to some little kid on the mic...haha! i love him!:D i'm also talking to my friend kysha about some changing things for herself...i am really shitty at these things but i figured since i'm bored wth right??? ha! well i'm done with this one for now but i might come up with something else to talk about soon...xDx

Ramblings Of A Psychotic Witch
Ich habe Pläne große Pläne Ja ich baue ein Häuschen dir Und du ziehst nie wieder aus Ich werde immer bei dir sein Ich baue dir ein Haus Draußen wird ein Garten sein Innen wird es dunkel sein Ich habe Pläne große Pläne Ich baue ein Häuschen dir Stein um Stein Siehst du mir bei der Arbeit zu Und du sollst Teil des Ganzen sein Und keiner hört dich schreien

The Ramblings Of A Manic Depressive
The Ramblings of a Manic Depressive Suicidal thoughts come and go. It’s always the same. Always the friend. Always the “hook up”. Never loved. So tired. Should this be the way it is? Is this all I’m here for? What is the meaning of life? Does life even HAVE a meaning? I don’t really want to go on. I’m so tired of being alone. Alone. Lonely. I laugh so I don’t cry. I make you laugh to hide how I feel. You don’t know. No one does. It won’t be long. The world closes in on me. Freedom is crushing me. So tired. So alone. Never my turn. Never me. Confined to my own mind. Rejected by society. I give in. I give up. Should I do it? Will anyone care? What’s stopping me? Life….it goes on for at least one more day. I’ll see what tomorrow brings.

Ramblings
let me start by sayin I have no idea where I am going with this hence the title of ramblings. When I write I put my music on, slip the headphones over my ears, block out as much of the outside world and its distractions as i can and just start to type. Thats my formula for when I just seem to need to write. See I consider myself a word-smith.That is to say I use my words to try and weave a tapestry rather than just tell a story or give information. In truth the words are not always mine, or as some would say not from the more concious (think I spelled that right) mind and rather from the part that gets locked away in the deepest recesses and shielded from th world. Eh I dunno which is right I just know that sometimes I get writing and my words flow as if it were someone else writing. I have even stopped after writing and looked back over what was on the page and said where the hell did that come from. Anyway that to me is a word-smith as opposed to a writer who uses properly thought ou

Ramblings Of A Has-been Fu-rock Star
I probably won't use too many names here, except as thank-yous. It's not important otherwise. SO... Day 3 of The Aftermath is nearly done...I'm still feeling pleased with myself! Although that's wearing off now... Almost everyone (probably 4 of you) reading this knows that Tuesday, I was the in the Fubar Spotlight. I admit, it took a couple of weeks and some nice people whorin-I mean, helping me, but I had accumulated enough to get it at least three times, but if I bid on it at 11 PM my time and then went to bed, invariably one or more people outbid me by 3 hours later. So I finally decided enough was enough and Monday night, I set my alarm for 1:50 AM Tuesday morning and went to bed.When my alarm went off, I rolled out of bed, woke up my 'puter and clicked on the BID link for the Spotlight. Bleary-eYed as I was, I had a lil trouble reading the numbers, but they finally made sense - Latest bid: 28100250, and Minimum Bid - 28100500. I waited until my 'puter clock said 1:58 then clicked

Rambling.. Venting.. Etc
I think I've done this blog before. I guess it is time to do it again because once again I have been foolish. Let's face it, when people say things to you, you really do want to believe them. At least I do. I want to believe, and trust. And even with people who have failed in the past, I still do it. Am I foolish? Just dumb? I don't know, but it is who I am. Do I need to change? There are things I just won't believe anymore, especially with certain people. Maybe I just don't believe in those things anymore. I'm just tired of some of the BS in life. BUT... I'm not going to get down or depressed. I'm not even going to worry over it. It has probably cost me a friend.. but what is done is done. I've been foolish twice. Will not be a third time.

Ramblings
"Democracy is buying a big house you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you wish were dead. And, unlike communism, democracy does not mean having just one ineffective political party; it means having two ineffective political parties. ...Democracy is welcoming people from other lands, and giving them something to hold onto -- usually a mop or a leaf blower. It means that with proper timing and scrupulous bookkeeping, anyone can die owing the government a huge amount of money. ... Democracy means free television, not good television, but free. ... And finally, democracy is the eagle on the back of a dollar bill, with 13 arrows in one claw, 13 leaves on a branch, 13 tail feathers, and 13 stars over its head -- this signifies that when the white man came to this country, it was bad luck for the Indians, bad luck for the trees, bad luck for the wildlife, and lights out for the American eagle."

Ramblings
Been awhile since I last wrote here and I thought it was time to keep my peeps up to date on my so called life.....Anyway, Trish does not live here anymore, her kids were surprised at her choice and decided it was best for her to go live with them in Florida, we do keep in touch with email and she told me she has found a lady friend down there and they are having an affair, which is like so cool!!!! Sam is back at work, she enjoys having her summers off and really liked this past summer, I'd hope she did, she learned how to eat pussy and use a strappie very well....anyway she is getting back in the swing of things and we only have sex every 3 or 4 days now. Which is cool, means I can seduce other ladies for our bed....hehehehe. I had said earlier that sam and me were going to get a place together and had found a place but we decided that it would be much better staying with my friend, we all get along so well, no of us gets in the way, we mesh so well and besides it is nice to have

Ramblings Of Me...
Choices, love, pain,..When do you say it is enough? Why do you say it is enough? Everyone makes their own choices in life. What choice are we onwhen you become a pattern? A continuous cycle...Change? Sights and sounds,they change.What doesn't change? Everything... Some hide and others wait for the ones that hide. Do you think about the choice before it is made? Would you think to put your shoes on before you go outside? The instruction manual for life will never end. It is your own manual. Each with their own as well. You, moment by moment, write your own manual as you choose your direction in life. But because you are not alone here. Your choices may conflict with anothers or it may coincide. Action=reaction. Time is mearly space to plan a choiceor choose "spurr of the moment". The choice is what creates life, creates meaning. It creates a path that always leads to another choice. When you are done writting your manual to life you give it to yourchildren. Then they not only have a

Rambling....
Who are all these people? Why do we call each other friends?If I met you on the street would you say hello? Doubtful at best but maybe some would what the hell do I know! I was reading some blogs recently one was all sex and fantasy stories another rambled on about politics and blah blah blah!My favourite was the people I hate one about how she hates the beautiful people,It's kind of sad that you would hate someone even jokingly because they have perky boobs or a pretty face.I have found some of the ugliest people are the "beautiful" ones.But that's just my opinion and in the big world of Fu bar who really gives a damn about my opinion or yours. Do you ever wonder what people would think about you if they knew the real you?Not the Fu person but the person who is sitting behind that computer right now! Scary isn't it? Yes I am bored I have been staring at Dr.Phil and watched the View and Oprah and my mind is numb filled with a bunch of useless info now!I Do have a life out side this

Rambling..
You know, this is a rambler of an entry. I am a very open and outspoken person. Yet at the same time I am a very private and closed up individual, if that can even make any sense. A really wise friend told me that I need to come out of my "bubble" and not be in such a shell.I was thinking about that statement and pondered how is that possible. I can talk to just about anyone and tell them just about anything. I guess most people I talk to, aren't people who last around long enough to really get close to me. So in a sense it really doesn't matter what I say. I really don't have anything to hide or any information I divulge about myself I feel doesn't really matter. Things that really really matter to me, or are close to the heart of me, no one ever gets close enough to me to know. Or rather hangs around. Though I have tons of people in my life everyday, I can count on one hand the number of people who are close to me. Even then, they really don't know what is with in me. They a

Ramble
when i think back on all the things ive done it makes me sad. It makes me wish i hadnt hurt the people i have. The changes ive made are effecting the people in my life direrently. I wonder sometimes if there is a way to please every body but i know the only one i have to please is myself. But im not pleased with the the maybe i should haves in my life. Its that hind sight that keep sober people drunk inside. It says to thy own self be true, but what if ones own self is not acceptable to him or others. this is the self i lost while drinking, i had so many masks i wore for diff people i lost the original. It may sound negative as hell but what needs to be done is a real fuck em all and roll with myself as i am, to certain ones i have to be patiant and understanding. some its love me or leave me . people say they find serenity in sobriety i cant find it beceause maybe i dont deserve it or am not looking overanalyzation will be the death of me like i said just rambling punch me in th

Rambling
November 15, 2009Quote of the Day"Pain is a part of being alive, and we need to learn that. Pain does not last forever, nor is it necessarily unbeatable, and we need to be taught that."- Harold Kushner Oh how I wish I could learn this and accept this. I do understand that pain is a part of being alive and in some sake that it doesn't last forever, but, with the depression and the anxiety the pain is intensified ten fold. I have never been very good at dealing nor adapting to emotional pain. So many times I was tired of being sick and tired, there were times I would try to end the pain all together, but failed at being a failure. Then of course the times I would self medicate, but all that did was get me in trouble with the law, so that had to end as well. When I was being verbally abused, there were times I would even cut on myself to just block the pain in one area to cause pain in another area. Other times I would literally hit something such as a wall or a corner of a dresser to c

Ramble
there is but nothing but today and yeaterday. i want to live for the moment and enjoy the pictures of the past. tomorrow dictates itself at this point. i get twisted and i get strange, but i have the sweetest heart. i like the things in life that make me smile like mohawks and tattoos. i will eventually get my ink, but life is too boring to recreate the picture right now

Ramblings
1. I got up way too early today. I'm not use to beging up at 6:30. I totally enjoy that extra hour of sleep. 2. Coffee is my friend. Just wondering why it makes me pee so much. =/ 3. I can multi task fairly well. Nothing like having 2 tabs open and 2 different web browsers open. ;] 4. Farmville on Facebook is addictive. I just wish I could fan the damn application already. I want to expand my farm. 5. People that know math turn me on. 6. I love my friends!!!!!!!

Ramblings
Those stars in your eyes they shine like diamonds, Mind the thieves along the way, the stealers of dreams along the way Kind words only travel so far it seems, when the feeling behind them are fake and unclean So mind you're eyes because they can deceive, and soon enough you'll be lying with thieves

Rambles Of The Flowing Words That Have Been Given
Twisting and turningSwirling around within my selfThoughts racing Questions invadingYelling, talking, screamingWho's there?I see people around meYet I see no oneWhere am I?Who am I?Am I dead?Am I alive?Problems solvedNew ones ariseWhat do I do?Where do I go?No one to trustNo one to talk to Secrets buried Never to be spokenMy heart in turmoilOver love?Over nothing?I know what I have doneI know who I have helpedI know my callingYet I am lostLost within my selfLost to societyLost to a life of fearLost to everyone and every where around meWhat do I want?Where do I want to be?Who do I want to be with?How do I love?Dancing aloneSitting aloneTalking aloneYelling aloneI want someone to want meI need someone to love meI need to be heldI need to be with someoneI want everythingNo more unhappinessNo more feeling unwantedI want a familyFriendsWhat are they?Who are they?Are they real?Is all I have is the spirit world?Should be enough?Should I want more?Am I selfish?Will I find my destiny?What is my

Ramblings
So Tuesday evening I took a new energy Supplement, Rhodiloa 110, that my wife received free at her half marathon...thanks to this new Supplement, I had plenty of energy and got 2 hours of shitty sleep... I will not be taking that again unless I plan an all night bender... Wednesday...get up at 3:45 central time...travel to ABQ...16 hour work day...too tired to go out to eat so bought a frozen pizza for dinner and 2 Harps (it was St. Pattys day after all)...had a great conversation with haiku who kept me up way too late...:) went to bed 11pm mountain time and slept like crap (starting to get sick)...work up at 7am and worked for 10 hours...feeling shittier as the day progressed... went out to eat to Red Robin and they lost my food order...2nd time I have been there and 2nd time they have completely fucked up my order...good news they comp'ed my meal but made me pay for my one beer...beer was probably not a good idea but fuck it i was sick... Went to bed and 10:30 and slept like shi

The Ramblings
where i had once always seen a blurry face, the blurry is no longer there. there is now a face to go with my thoughts and dreams. i miss him as soon as our conversation has ended. cry when we have to say our goodbyes. i never thought feelings like this would overtake my thoughts, my dreams, my life in its entirety. warm sensations, happy dreams, the feeling of being loved and wanted, needed, adored. when i imagine my future i see his face right there beside me every step of the way. taking care of me when i am sick, making me laugh when i am sad, pushing me to go farther because he knows i can. he is my future, the one i have always dreamed of. the warm body laying next to me in bed. the hand holding mine. the father of my future children. he is the one who puts a smile on my face day after day, night after night. the person that is there in the good times and the bad. the person i can look into his eyes and the world around us seems to disappear. we begin to tal

Ramblings
It's been a loooooong week...and it's not over yet. For those who don't know, my work involves dealing with people on different time zones (no, I don't work for Fubar). That means I'm waitingggggggggggg waitingggggggggg waitinggggggggg for that little gap between when Nigerians are at work and the Australians haven't buggered off from work because they're lazy bastards. When that gap emerges, I get to yell. A lot. I enjoy it. Because there's a purpose to it. There's ALWAYS a purpose to what I do. And it's rarely for myself that I'm doing it. That increases my enjoyment. Radical I know. I still owe Liverjuice his super-whoring tools, and I still haven't finished the epic pome...ok, I haven't really started the epic pome...I'd do the 'why Doug should win Fubar' thing but at this point me voicing the word fubar aloud would probably result in a veer off into a significant rant ending in five minutes of mumbling about snivelling cowards...and then it'd be too big to upload and I

Ramblage
It's been a while since i've written anything new. My mind has been blank, the words have refused to come through There have been many thoughts floating around my head Thoughts of hope yet some thoughts of dread. I'm sitting here thinking of words to impart But the words seem to be stuck somewhere down below my heart. I could sit and ramble about the events of my day But that would be boring and you'd look away I could make up a tale thats fascinating and intriguing But it would be nonsense and not worth you reading So instead i'll stop rambling on and on Until the words that i'm seeking come back from where they've gone

Ramblings Of An Insane Mind
No one told you to hit that switch. You were warned so many times what it would do. You took me out in the world and made me see, then burned it down in front of me. Now it's done, what is left no one knows. Some days I wish I could turn back time and take back the things I've done. But I know they are all just learning experiences that I have either tried to fade out or leap over. I do know one thing I am me. Take it or leave it's not that I can't change it's that I won't change I am happy of who I am. I know there is a hole it's deep and it will take a lot to fill that hole. I don't know who is strong enough to do it who has enough patience to stick it out. I do know that person will be truly blessed if they do. Until then my friends be careful of those switches, If you truly love whom your with show it in all you do to have love is to live and not many truly get that experience. Forever Lost, Kael Dusk

Ramblin On
i woke up to the sound of wind today. it was not an Oklahoma wind, but it was enough to draw me in to consciousness and think that maybe i should get up and close my window, and wonder if the trees outside the house are strong enough to survive it. my roommate promises we are safe...after all we are his human pets and he wouldn't let anything bad happen to us....my semi conscious state brought me back to before...almost like a flashback in a movie...to a time where i was almost in love enough to have my heart broken...(yanno,,,IF i had a heart)....we used to go rock hunting on the weekends, just outside of the basin of Cabazon (it means big headed, or...like...retarded...so that's a little funny)...which is near Joshua Tree.....there was this spot where the wind was consistent....amazing...standing there, overlooking the desert...the wind kissing your skin, while at the same time letting you know it could drop you face first in the dirt if it chose to stop paying attention to you....

Rambling
I can't sleep, so thought I'd post a random thought I had. I feel that people shouldn't say I can't do this, or can't do that, and noone should tell you you can't do something, regardless of the reason. Yes I understand there are exceptions, it takes legs to walk, and takes arms to reach out, however where theres a will theres a way, you can still achieve great things regardless of your disadvantages. If you have no arms and someone says you cant reach out and grab that apple, show them you can, by improvising. You can use your feet, even use your mouth with a grabber thingie and you can reach out and grab that apple. I know there are exceptions to everything, but a vast majority of people with *disadvantages* are perfectly capable of doing everything they want to do. Sometimes it might take more concentration, or extra effort to do it, but you might surprise yourself if you really try to do it. Don't let anyone tell you you can't do something you want to do. If you want it, go get

Ramblings
It's 1.02 pm. For me...that's the equivalent of a normal person who works a nine to five job being awake at 4 am still with no sleep in sight. And this brings up why I am awake. A great friend and coworker was in a serious car accident this morning. She also happened to have her two year old little boy with her. And she is pregnant as well. Thankfully everyone left the scene, by some miracle with minimal injuries. But the heartache I felt while I sat in that office waiting to hear was nearly more then I could bear. I stayed at work instead of going and seeing for myself that she was ok. I was able to do more good there. So my twelve hour night turned into a 16 hour night, providing me even more time to ponder what's been running through my clustered mind of late, bringing us to our next topic. There's a lot going on right now. A lot of Real Life stuff that most don't know about. Some do. Those that do, understand my dilemma as well as my heartache. I doubt anyone truly knows the imp

Ramblings Of A Sane Person In An Insane World
I got an e-mail from my brother this afternoon before i walked out from my house today... My great aunt died last night....she raised me since i was 2 yrs old...she taught me everything I know and more than any man (meaning my biological father) could ever teach me.....i was pretty bummed at work and i tried to keep a straight face but it was very hard... I ll be ok ..I found out the funeral is on Christmas eve and theres no way im going back home to NJ on Thursday to a funeral so close to Christmas...... Why isnt there some kind of cosmic moratorium with death during the holidays?? What does "Spotted Dick" taste like??? Why do people act like morons during a time everyone is suppposed to be nice to each other??? Why do hot chicks ( who know they can get a date with any man they can) act like they are undateable or the men they want to date are no good for them?? Why does a dog lick its balls?? Why do women constantly complain about nonsensical shit?? Why dont i trust grown

Rambling
By the sea a woman sits and waits for her love to come. She knows he will be there as soon as she falls asleep, but she is not ready. She wants to feel his arms around her, taste his sweet lips and feel the warmth of his body next to hers. Her dreams are filled with passion, but her nights are spent alone.

Rambling..
Just feel like writing a blog.. no one reads this shit anyhow.. Pretty disgusted with the amount of people who have no shame and post thier naked sex pics on fubar.. I just don't get it.. probably never will.. I've managed to keep track of nearly all the people who have me blocked and the number is mind boggling.. I am truly hated.. Really sick of the racism going around the mumms and fubar in general.. The bullshit with Joe, Bob, and bill is really old and I wish those pukes would just die.. fubar would be alot more fun without them.. I'm sick of being underpaid and this whole gas bullshit has me worried that the economy will suffer and my company won't survive it.. I miss kissing Jen.. Blazers beat the Heat tonight.. God does love me.. Seems like everyone has drugs but me..

Ramblings And Whatnot
ok, well most have read my status and are asking what's up ... it's really more than anything ... i am frustrated, with just about everything. Yes, it's part of life. Normally I can write and deal and things will be fine. I am working to that point. I enjoy writing but lately nothing is coming out the way it's needed. Because of a couple issues with work, I am not working there anymore. I realize it takes more than one person to make the situation but when you bend over backwards and someone is still being a cvnt and everything was handled let it go, don't hold onto it. Definately don't call me names for something someone else did. and don't do in front of customers. It can be handled before or after, NOT during. So anyway, yeah I am not working which has me on edge. I am really odd about things, I like working. I am working with a few places to hopefully start soon. I am hoping this week. I am also hoping that something else positive will happen so I can get moved in

Rambling Thoughts On A Train Had To Be Put Down.
so tear it up and throw it out there's nothing left to talk about only everything but you won't bend and so I break and this is like a bad remake and I'm too orignial for that always searching for some elusive thing and you it keeps you from me and from noticing that it's all right here but leave, it's nothing only everything never been a quitter, I thrive on the fight but I know what feels wrong and I know I'm right you never give yourself and I always do scared though I might be and to you it's nothing it's only everything

Rambling.
Its a sad and disturbing thought that I'm having for the first time in years.. This feeling of lonliness and fear is overwhelming my usual thoughts.. My detachment from others, the hate I feel when I see them, completely turning around on me. I have no friends because of that hate, my family doesnt like me, I cant stand to look in the mirror.. I look at the pictures of my old friends, analyze them from a distance, envying the smiles they have.. They look so happy. And here I sit, alone, remenicing of the times I used to have, regretting the days Ive wasted hating the world.. I went into town today, and tried to have a good time.. my staying away from society has caused a slight case of social anxiety.. I do great with one on ones with certain people, and I thought I would be fine in a crowd.. But when my old friends tried to talk to me I hung my head and avoided eye contact.. Im so used to hiding behind a screen that I can't face the world anymore.. Ive become what I used to mock and

Ramblings
Ramblings about my life...I am not now the man I believe I can be...and do not know how to get there from here.But I will!I am unemployed, my benefits exhausted...and scraping by with the help of a family that deserves a far bettter person as a brother than I've been these past few years...Where did I go wrong? Where did I fail? Was it by my own choice? I have to think it was...I've made the decisions in my life which have led me to bee where I am at this moment in time...nobody else...just me.I Point the fingert at myself and wonder...not "What have I done"...but "How do I change things?"How do I undo the decisions that I've made?How do I right the wrongs?How do I turn things around when I'm falling at an increasing rate into a black hole with nothing to grab on to?I have no job...can't even get an interviewMistakes from my past haunt me and hinder meNobody loves me right now...although some have tried...but I can't let them.I try to love only those that will not alow me to...is th

Ramble, Ramble.
I am starting to feel old chains sneaking around in the darkest recesses of my mind. The same chains that weighed me down so much what feels like so long ago. I can not say I know what is making this happen. Hell, I do suppose it would be me. I seem to have this tendency to give out far more than I take in. I spend all of my energy and willingly give it to everyone and everything around me. This such as focusing and retaining my energy levels are becoming much more of a hassle as of late. My mood began to dip and I decided that writing may be an answer, or at least a way to vent whatever it is that is weighing me down. In a way I feel as if this veil that has been preventing me from reaching myself has thicking and gone from translucent to opaque. Blocking off everything rather than simply hindering me. Yet it is simply this moment. I know I have plenty to be happy for, or even grateful for. I mean, I am safe and will be warm for the winter. Although, I do feel the road calling t m

Ramblings Of A Mom
As I sit here, watching the girls putter around the house doing their own thing, I remember. I think back to when I was their age and hoping I would grow up and be able to do all the things that grown ups do. Although, I had no clue as to what it was. It just seemed a whole lot cooler than the things I was allowed to do at the time. Now I think back and wish I hadn't been in such a rush. Riding around on my hot wheels, playing 'She Ra' or hide and seek with the kids on the street. Going from one house to another, watching tv or in the neighbors pool. So much less to worry about back then. No internet, had to rely on ourselves for entertainment. Listening for mom and dad to walk down the hall late at night, while 'pretending' to be asleep and sneaking a peek at whatever late night show was on the tele. Here I am, an adult at last. At least that's what the laws say and I am wishing for the times when the biggest thing I had to worry about was whether or not my homework was done or whethe

Rambling Of A Crazy Ass Canuck
It's amazing what some people will say to each other and never think about...words that get tossed around like cookies. Words that have lost all true meaning....does anyone truly know what love is...can you find it online...are you truly capable of loving someone you've never touched..held? Some people come to this site looking for it...and sadly will never find it...and very very very few...just might. I've discovered that people will lie, play...or treat you well to get what they figure you'll give..not thinking for one minute how it impacts the one being played...Life will always go on no matter what one says, or does...just remember in life what goes around comes around 3 fold...and to those who enjoy the pain of others..I'm sorry...this is gonna hurt...

Rambling Writings Of Writer's Block
While writing, which I do very often and quite fondly, I came up with this. I have no idea what it is, where I'm going with it, or what I'm doing, so without further ado, meet Kiska. A null. The hair on the back of Kiska's neck stood up straight, threatening to crawl down her spine in a cold sweat. Her eyes were fully dilated while staring down at what had once been the homecoming queen of Orione, Florida. The picture wrinkled in her hand was of a shining, rosy-cheeked cheerleader, not at all the skeletal child clinging to the bed covers.She seemed so out of place in the sunny pink room with its rose cabbage patterns and fluffy teddy bears pronouncing undying declarations of valentines. The photos pinned to the dresser mirror didn't show the hollow-faced sickly teen, but rather a laughing playful spirit.Her mother, Rosario, braced one shoulder against the door frame leading to the hallway as if she didn't have the strength to stand. Her own rosy cheeks were tear-stained and bruised

Rambling About Nothing Important.
I'm now a month and a half sober from alcohol.. Still horribly depressed. thinking about going back to the psych ward. I miss being happy, or feeling excited. what happend? why did i let my addictions eat me alive? when did I get so hollow? How many months have passed? I need serious help. I'm just afraid to get it. I dont want to be trapped again. If this is happening it will be next week. guess i'll keep you updated.

The Ramblings Of A Mad Man:
I sit alone in the dark thinking to myself. (how can i make the hunger stop) Death sits and watching my every move whiting for me to take my next life. (i know what i must do) out of no where i jump out and grab a random prison dragging her in to the darkness. my black finger nails taring through her flesh my lust for her` life to be extinguished is over powering. the screams in the darkness is ear shattering as i bite in to her chest going for her still betting hart i tear through the ribcage (all most there)I'm covered in her blood. the intensity of my hunger is over powering i must consume her hart.(that's only way to make it stop. i must make it stop)i pull away i look down i see it. (it still beats)I rip out her heart and I bight in to it like a apple. her lifeless body lye at my feet. a hand touches my solder i turn to kill again death smiles and shakes a mocking finger and walks passed. he bends down to her lifeless body kissing her cold lips of her corps sucking out her inanest

Rambles....
Im complex and tempermental.I have hidden secrets that even the bestest of friends dont know.Theres things hidden deep in my walls that many try to see, yet are unable to grasp. If I let you in its your job to cherish that gift I just gave to you, not take it for granted or even look passed it. If youre unable to understand it then you try to...if you never try you will never find what it is I hold. So much thats left unseen about me, its the ones who take the time out, that get to see the me thats hidden. I dont open up much and I leave so much a mystery. So many are captivated, but by what?A look?The mystery?The challenge?They have no idea what it is that draws them near, but yet they fear....And when they allow that fear to take hold....Its when they let go...

Ramblings
so here is a little rambling by me... Allright first off despite what people may think, I do not bling/gift or anything else for NSFW. If I do bling or gift you, its because I want to do it. I do not require anything in return, unless its a mutual trade agreement involving swapping blings/gifts. Also not hardcore or worried about my rank. i run things to run them, bling things to bling them.. usually when high percentage bonuses are on for that particular action/ability. sometimes i do rank high, other times i dont. I put people in ym family, because I think they deserve to be there, or i am helping them out in some way. i change it up as I see fit. My family my choice who I have in there. I'm here to have a good time, and pass time. I usually do both here. I have met some really great people on here. I've also met some not so great people. It happens just like the *real world*. Also I know people will think what they want, it doesn't bother me. also you can talk about me behind my

Ramblings And Such
I have so many things to say to so many people put I don't have the nerve to say it to their face. Odd...I know. Here they are, who knows.....one may be about you :) 1. You are the biggest mistake of my life. You have caused me so many problems. You really aren't worth it. 2. It was so much fun breaking things with you. I wish we could do it again. 3. I wish you could see what I see when I look at you. You have so much potential to do so many things, but you hold yourself back. 4. You are my best friend. Thank you for always being there for me when I've needed you. 5. I only added you because we have mutual friends. I wish I could delete you, but I don't want to go through all of my list to find you. 6. When I first added you I wasn't really all that sure about you, but you've proven yourself to be a great person. Thank you for listening to me complain about random things :) 7. I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. I didn't know things were that way with you and him that long ago.

Ramdom Memm
. Initials: SMK 2. Name someone with the same birthday as you: i have no clue...i really dont care 3. Last thing you ate: turkey...yumm 4. For or against same sex marriage: For same sex marriage of course!! 5. Are you homophobic: Hell no....why would i be for same sex marriage if i was? 6. Do you still watch cartoons on Saturday morning? Only if i am awake...LOL 7. Do you believe in God: Not the cookie cutter version of god no 8. How many U.S states have you been to: Louisiana, Illinois, Maryland, Rhode Island, New York, Delware, North Carolina, Georgia, South Carolina, Alaska, California, The state of Washington, New Jersey, Florida, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona,Colorado...i cant think of any more so 18 so far 9. How many of the U.S states have you lived in: 5 - Louisiana, California, Arizona, New York, Florida 10. Ever lived outside of the US: Nope. 11. Name something you like physically about yourself: My feet and my eyes. 12. Something n

Ramdom Poetry
Memories And Whispers whispers breeze fluttering by on satin lies told when young and each day was won tickles and hugs of gentle moments in the sun these are things that memory brings when sitting alone drinking in that last memory, savoring it's purity, rolling it around your teeth cross velvet tongues and ruby lips praying that this memory would never end fallen enthralled maybe comatose towards a brief respite an ominous portend of hellish days and wintry nights which do blend, ascend and transcend normalcy only to have memory rescind my lonely trend and disavow my lady friend sweet memory of long dead things driving me towards an insane end

Ramdom Poem
your are shinny and i debris such a comparison between you and me! your are shinny and i debris your life is full and mine is empty there is no middle for you and me! your are shinny and i debris i am searching and you arent i see, some day i hope to be as happy as the! your are shinny and i debris my hope is strong i hope you see for my lust for love will always be! your are shiny and i debris i may be dirty that you can see, but a million years of trying and you will see! you are shiny and i am debris your luster for life i can see, but the still is something missing between you and me! your are shinny and i debris as i lay in my debris the world keep putting shit on me! your are shinny and i debris your all happy the world can see as i lay here in misery! your are shinny and i debris the years have passes as we see your luster is fading in to me your are shinny and i debris for each passing day you will see,they come to search for you and me! your a

Ramen Salad
Dressing: 1 cup oil (canola is best) 1/2 cup sugar 1/3 cup white vinegar 2 packages beef ramen soup seasoning Salad: 1 lb. package cole salad mix 2 packages beef ramen noodles 1 cup salted sunflower seeds 1 cup slivered toasted slivered almonds 1/2 cup carrots (if not in the cole slaw mix) Prepare the dressing a day in advance by combining ingredients for dressing. Refrigerate overnight. Break up noodles, mix all dry ingredients together, pour dressing over dry ingredients; mix well and chill before serving.

Ramen Stir Fry
Ingredients: * 1 pound beef boneless sirloin * 2 cups water * 1 pkg Oriental-flavor ramen soup mix * 1 bag(16 oz) fresh refrigerated stir-fry vegetables 1/4 cup stir fry sauce Method Remove fat from beef. Cut beef into thin strips. Spray 12-inch nonstick skillet with cooking spray; heat over medium-high heat. Cook beef in skillet 3-5 minutes, stirring occasionally, until brown. Remove beef from skillet. Heat water to boiling in skillet. Break noodles from soup mix into water; stir until slightly softened. Stir in vegetables. Heat to boiling. Boil 5 to 7 minutes, stirring occassionaly, until vegetables are crisp-tender. Stir in contents of seasoning packet from soup mix, stir fry sauce and beef. Cook 3 to 5 minutes, stirring frequently, until hot. Notes: Number of servings: 4

The Ramlings Of A Goddess
Have you ever looked into a mirror and Not recognize the person looking back at you? I never like what I saw in the mirror, I hated having my picture taken. I wanted to be invisible. I don't see that any more..... I look in the mirror and it startles me.. I don't know this Beautiful, Vivacious, Woman... Looking back at me... She can't be me But wait... She is Me I am still taken aback... She is me, and I am She I am very much in a getting to know me phase... All over again I am having a blast, I am also scared shitless My New word is Courage! So you're scared... put yourself out there anyway... it might just be worth it I know it is for me.... Life is definitely changing... I like what I see... This Beautiful. Vivacious, Woman Is Me!

Rammstein "feuer Frei "translation
Whoever knows pain becomes criticized from the fire that burned up the skin I throw a light in my face A hot cry fire at will! * Bang bang Whoever knows pain is raised from the fire that burns in desire A sparking thrust into her womb A hot cry fire at will! Bang bang Fire at will! Whoever knows pain is dangerous from the fire that burns the soul Bang bang The burned child is dangerous with fire that separates from the life A hot cry Bang bang Fire at will! Your happiness is not my happiness it is my misery Bang bang Fire at will! * "Feuer frei!" is the German expression used to order weapons to be shot, as in "Fire at will !". Literally it is "Fire freely".

Rammstein "du Hast" Translation
You you have * you have me you have asked me you have asked me and I have said nothing Do you want, until death seperates you, to be faithful to her for all days No Do you want, until death, which would seperate, ** to love her, even in bad days No * When Till is just saying "Du hast," it sounds as if he could either be saying "Du hast" (you have) or "Du hasst" (you hate). This is to give the song a double meaning, even though the official lyrics say "Du hast." ** There is another sort of double meaning here. If the line is read as "Tod der Scheide" it would be "until the death of the vagina" and not "until death, which would seperate" ("Tod, der scheide"). The whole song is a play on German wedding vows (Wollen Sie einander lieben und achten und die Treue halten bis dass der Tod euch scheidet? - Do you want to love and respect each other and to remain faithful, until death seperates you?). Instead of answering with "Ja," Till says "Nein," finally answering the

Rammstein-bestrafe Mich
Bestrafe mich bestrafe mich Stroh wird Gold und Gold wird Stein deine Größe macht mich klein du darfst mein Bestrafer sein (ja) Der Herrgott nimmt der Herrgott gibt Bestrafe mich bestrafe mich du meinst ja und ich sag nein schließ mich ein in dein Gebet bevor der Wind noch kälter weht Deine Größe macht mich klein du darfst mein Bestrafer sein du darfst mein Bestrafer sein Deine Größe macht mich klein du darfst mein Bestrafer sein du darfst mein Bestrafer sein du darfst mein Bestrafer sein deine Größe macht ihn klein du wirst meine Strafe sein der Herrgott nimmt der Herrgott gibt doch gibt er nur dem den er auch liebt bestrafe mich... ++++++++++++++++++++++ Punish me punish me straw turns to gold and gold turns to stone your size makes me small you can be my punisher (yeah) The Lord God takes the Lord God gives Punish me punish me you say yes and I say no include me in your prayer before the wind blows even colder Your size makes me s

Rammstein-mein Teil (live)
„Suche gut gebauten 18-30jährigen zum Schlachten“ Der Metzgermeister Heute treff' ich einen Herrn Der hat mich zum Fressen gern Weiche Teile und auch harte stehen auf der Speisekarte Denn du bist was du isst und ihr wisst was es ist Es ist mein Teil – nein Mein Teil – nein Da das ist mein Teil – nein Mein Teil – nein Die stumpfe Klinge gut und recht Ich blute stark und mir ist schlecht Muss ich auch mit der Ohnmacht kämpfen ich esse weiter unter Krämpfen Ist doch so gut gewürzt und so schön flambiert und so liebevoll auf Porzellan serviert Dazu ein guter Wein und zarter Kerzenschein Ja da lass ich mir Zeit Etwas Kultur muss sein Denn du bist was du isst Und ihr wisst was es ist Es ist mein Teil – nein Mein Teil – nein Denn das ist mein Teil – nein Yes it's mein Teil – nein Ein Schrei wird zum Himmel fahren Schneidet sich durch Engelsscharen Vom Wolkendach fällt Federfleisch auf meine Kindheit mit Gekreisch “Looking for a well-built

Rammstein-los (live)
[English Translation] We were nameless And without songs Really wordless We weren't any more Without a good voice We are still But not soundless People hear us, right After a gust of wind A storm broke Simply without example It was time! GO They were speechless Really shocked -Really desperate About what has happened Simply inconceivable And guaranteed Unbelievable They said with no reason The music is a pity So shameless That should be forbidden It is useless What you are trying So tasteless How you are composing It is hopeless senseless helpless You are God ...less We were nameless We have a name We were wordless The words came Without a good voice We are still But not soundless You can hear that We aren't perfect Only a bit uncontrolled You went quiet Don't (let) us go We were nameless And without songs Really wordless We weren't any more Without a good voice We are still But not soundless People hear us, right After a gu

Rammstein- Du Hast Mich: The True Meaning
After many long conversations with various people it has come to my attention that nearly everyone has no clue what Rammstein is saying (lol). Mostly the misconception of what the phrase Du Hast Mich means. Many, if not all, have come to believe (for some reason unknown to me) that it means You Hate Me, which for the MOST part is true. However it is NOT entirely true. Yes Du means you. Yes Mich means me. But Hast DOES NOT mean Hate.Hast in fact means Have. I can understand how this mistake has come about. A simple spelling error. If the song were to be called You Hate Me then the tittle would read Du HASS Mich and not Du HAST Mich. just one wrong letter has changed the true meaning for many.But now you finally know the true meaning of Do Hast Mich You Have Me. However Hast CAN mean hate if used in the correct sentence structure which is not the case in this song. Time for a quick recap: Du = You Mich = Me Hast = Have Hass = Hate to make the difference of You Hate Me

Rammstein - Ich Will
Ich will Ich will Ich will Ich will Ich will Ich will Ich will (Ich will) Ich will, dass ihr mir vertraut (Ich will) Ich will, dass ihr mir glaubt (Ich will) Ich will eure Blicke spürn (Ich will) Jeden Herzschlag kontrollieren (Ich will) Ich will eure Stimmen hören (Ich will) Ich will die Ruhe stören (Ich will) Ich will dass ihr mich gut seht (Ich will) Ich will dass ihr mich versteht (Ich will) Ich will eure Phantasie (Ich will) Ich will eure Energie (Ich will) Ich will eure Hände sehen (Ich will) In Beifall untergehen Seht ihr mich? Versteht ihr mich? Fühlt ihr mich? Hört ihr mich? Könnt ihr mich hören? Wir hören dich! Könnt ihr mich sehen? Wir sehen dich! Könnt ihr mich fühlen? Wir fühlen dich! Ich versteh euch nicht Könnt ihr mich hören? Wir hören dich! Könnt ihr mich sehen? Wir sehen dich! Könnt ihr mich fühlen? Wir fühlen dich! Ich versteh euch nicht Ich will Ich will Ich will Ich will Wir wollen, dass ihr uns vertraut Wir

Ramones - Blitzkrieg Bop
Hey ho, let's go Hey ho, let's go They're forming in a straight line They're going through a tight wind The kids are losing their minds The Blitzkrieg Bop They're piling in the back seat They're generating steam heat Pulsating to the back beat The Blitzkrieg Bop. Hey ho, let's go Shoot'em in the back now What they want, I don't know They're all reved up and ready to go

Ramos X1 E Altri Tablet Cinesi Con Exynos 5250
Lun, 15 Apr 13Laura BenedettiPDFStampaA- A A+Dopo il video sul primo prototipo di tablet con SoC dual-core Rockchip RK3168, passiamo ai modelli di tablet cinesi con SoC Samsung Exynos 5250, esposti alla Hong Kong Electronics Fair 2013. Tra questi anche il nuovo Ramos X1. tablet android cinesi Samsung Exynos 5250 è il primo processore dua-core basato su ARM Cortex A15. Anche se Samsung e Nvidia hanno già in produzione dei chip quad-core e octa-core, Exynos 5250 è ancora oggi uno dei processori ARM-based più potenti sul mercato. Non dimentichiamo, infatti, che è lo stesso chip adottato dal Chromebook di Samsung e dal Nexus 10, anch'esso prodotto dall'azienda coreana per Google. Nonostante la sua timida partenza (con una diffusione limitata a pochi prodotti), finalmente il chip Samung si espande anche su altri mercati e su diversi dispositivi, soprattutto tablet Android economici prodotti da aziende cinesi. Tra questi segnaliamo i tablet Bean Shenzen Kehuitong Electrical e Ramos X1, ent

Ramos X10 Otro Mini Ipad Ya Disponible
Si ayer os presentamos las especificaciones de la tablet Ramos X10pro hoy os presentamos a su hermana pequeña la Ramos X10 y os confirmamos que esta ya disponible en el mercado por unos 152€. Esta tablet presenta un aspecto muy similar al de un ipad mini, cuenta con unos acabados muy trabajados y marcos verticales estrechos que facilitan su sujeción en esta posición.Esta tablet con pantalla IPS de 7,85″ pulgadas y aspecto 4:3 monta el Soc Actions ATM7029 Quad Core con Gpu Vivante GC1000, Tablet Android desde luego no es el Soc mas potente del mercado pero es suficiente para mover todo tipos de apps con soltura. Los que busqueis una tablet 4:3 con marcos estrechos ya disponeis de esta opción en el mercado donde seguro que en las proximas semanas vemos aparecer muchos de los modelos “ipad killers” que hemos ido presentando con anterioridad tablet baratas. Especificaciones técnicas básicasSoc Actions ATM7029, 1.5GHz, Cortex A5 Quad Core + GPU Vivante GC1000Pantalla

Rampant Homosexuality
I have always been an open minded chickie, in all aspects of life. I was once told by my religious aunt, that there was such a thing as being so open minded that your brain falls out, and that I should start wearing a hat to keep that from happening. *shrugs* Today though, I have a problem being open minded. My little prince of a kitty Dexter Morgan is gay. He lives in the house with Felix (male tuxedo cat) and Meg (female English Mastiff). Dexter does go outside when we are out where he has three little neighborhood buddies Capt. Jack (male orange Tabbly), Misty (gray female longhair) and Lola (Black female shorthair). As cats getting along goes, they all manage pretty well. However, Dexter is in love... with poor Felix. And my problem with this liason is that Felix is not interested in Dexter. Yes people, I am talking about homosexual cat anal rape! I have caught Dexter in the act. He acts all sweet, and starts washing Felix, then rubs his face on him, then leaps onto his back, bite

Rampant Unemployment = The Death Of The Middle Class - 40 Facts That Prove The Working Class Is Being Systematically Wiped Out (repost)
Without an abundance of good jobs, the middle class in the United States is going to shrivel up and die. Right now, rampant unemployment is absolutely killing communities all over America. Hopelessness and poverty are exploding and many are now wondering if we are actually witnessing the slow death of the middle class. There simply are not nearly enough "good jobs" to go around anymore, and even many in the mainstream media are referring to this as a "long-term structural problem" with the economy. The only thing that most working class Americans have to offer in the marketplace is their labor. If nobody will hire them they do not have any other ways to provide for their families. Well, there is a problem. Today wealth has become incredibly centralized. The big corporations and the big banks dominate everything. Thanks to incredible advances in technology and thanks to the globalization of our economic system, the people with all the money don't have to hire as

The Rampage
. - Bryan Cameron scored a hat trick and added an assist as the Barrie Colts topped the Guelph Storm 7-5 in the Ontario Hockey League Friday night. Victor Cruz Jersey SHANGHAI: Cut through, cut through, yelled head coach Bob Donewald Jr and the players on the court moved to his commands. James Jones Jersey . As the first foreign head coach of Shanghai Sharks, Donewald, the son of renowned American college basketball coach Bob Donewald Sr, is cautious when asked about his goals for this coming season. Its still too early (to think of a championship), right now I have got to make these guys work the way I want them to work and to me that is more important than anything else, he told China Daily. Related readings: Good news for floundering Sharks Yao secures deal with Sharks We dont know what others are doing yet. If Michael Jordan or LeBron James sign for Guangdong or Beijing, they will probably be doing better than us, he joked. Donewald is known for developing players back in the US, a

Rams (my Dad)
A year ago today I got the call that you were gone, even though we never met you were in everyway that counted my DAD, no one really gets how close we were I miss you so much it hurts. Today is gonna be extremely tough on me because it feels like I got the call just yesterday from Gail. I miss the way you would in yahoo get on mic and from what Gail said you had a twinkle in your eyes and a big ol grin on your face when you did it, but when you got on mic and said CRICK CRICK CHICKEY BABEY GIRL, I got a confession theres nothing i wouldnt give up or do to hear that just one more time I hope you were with my dad that morning when he smoked a cigar at 5:30 am to thank you for being the father he couldnt have been to me. when you were alive I felt every hug you gave me from there to here. Since you died I feel really alone no one but mom and dad get the fact that this day is hard on me I hope I have made you proud of me in the year since youve been gone Dad I became Dj Dreamz in f

Ram Tzu
You can be seen sitting for hours Palms turned to heaven Eyes shut Your breath even as it exits your nose. Your attention is focused. You've been doing this for awhile now You're getting good at it. At first you could barely sit five minutes Now you can disappear for hours. Ram Tzu has a question for you... Why do you come back? from No Way for the Spiritually "Advanced" by Ram Tzu

Ram Tzu
Ram Tzu knows this... It's a lie It's all a lie. The Buddha, Christ, Mohammed Moses, Lao Tzu, All were consummate liars. Blaspemer explain yourself! The Truth cannot be known In the way you think of knowledge. It does not make sense. It functions in a realm Closed to the mind. The first utterance about Truth Is the first step Down the path of deceit. In fact-- These very words are But another turd On the dung heap Of what passes for Truth. from No Way for the Spiritually "Advanced" by Ram Tzu

Ram Tzu
Ram Tzu knows this... The more you pursue it The further away it goes. The harder you struggle The deeper you sink. Only a drunk can Truly be sober. Only a whore can Truly be chaste. Life is no place For idle speculation. No one has ever learned From the mistakes of others. A lie cloaked in truth Is still a lie. If it makes sense to you You're in real trouble. You always look for God In high places... Guess again. Ram Tzu is not your friend If you find him Kill him. from No Way for the Spiritually "Advanced" by Ram Tzu

Ran
"Ran" is perhaps one the best films of all time. The film is an adaptation of William Shakespear's classic play, "King Lear." Ran tells the story of a powerful sixteenth century Japanese warlord, Hidetora Ichimonji(Tatsuya Nakadai), whom decides to retire and give his three sons his land by dividing it equally amongst them, but leaving his eldest son, Tarotakatora (Akira Terrao), as the main ruler of the three kingdoms. Falling prey to false praises from his treacherous sons Tarotakatora and Jiromasatora (Jinpachi Nezu), King Hidetora feels comforted in his decision. However, his youngest son, Saburonaotora (Daisuke Ryu), is banished by the King because Saburo was the only one who cared about his father to tell him the harsh truth. Backed by his own selfish pride, Lord Hidetora witnesses the brutal truth that Saburo was right. His kingdom collapsing around him as his two eldest sons fight for power. And Lady Kaede (Mieko Harada)who is wife of Tarotakatora, has her own plans of seducing

Ran Away
You ran away the other day To get away from the pain But, my love, I say unto you The pain will only worsen The longer you are gone I want to tell you to come back That I will keep you safe Away from all the pain But that would be a lie Life without pain does not exist However, I can promise this If you come back to me I will hold you close In my arms and in my heart From now until my last breath And I will never leave your side

The Ranchers Widow
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she placed an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks the two of them worked hard and the ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the rancher's widow said "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town on Saturday night. He returned around 2:30 am , and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him. She qu

Rancher's Wife
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was a very good-looking woman, and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two men applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well. Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night. One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two o'clock, and no hired hand. He returned around two-thi

Ranchero Shrimp
2 lbs. peeled and deveined shrimp 6 pcz. Roma tomatoes (diced) 1 piece white onion (sliced) 1 piece green poblano chile or 2 Anaheim (fresh diced) 1 clove garlic 3 tablespoons olive oil 1/4 tablespoon oregano 1 pinch cumin salt and black pepper, to taste Heat oil, add onion and garlic. Sauté over medium heat for a minute. Add tomatoes, chilies and spices; cover and bring to a simmer until the tomatoes are juicy (five minutes). Add the shrimp, uncover, bring to a boil and reduce sauce until shrimp is pink and fully cooked. Serve over Mexican rice, garnish with cilantro and green onions, serve with warm tortillas, making your own taco (one at time).

The Rancher's Wife
There once was a successful rancher who died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was determined to keep the ranch and make a go of it, but she knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand. Two men applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk. She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied, she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk. He turned out to be a fantastic worker, worked long hard hours every day and knew a lot about ranching. For weeks the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing really well. Then one day the rancher's wife said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job and the ranch looks great, you should go into town and kick up your heels." The hired hand agreed readily, and Saturday night went to town. However, one o'clock came and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired hand, finally two thirt

Rancid-fall Back Down
Don't worry about me, I'm gonna make it alright Got my enemies crossed out in my sight I take a bad situation gonna make it right In the shadows of darkness I stand in the light You see it's our style to keep it true I've had a bad year, a lot to go through I've been knocked out, beat down, black and blue She's not the one coming back for you She's not the one coming back for you If I fall back down, you're gonna help me back up again If I fall back down, you're gonna be my friend [x2] It takes disaster to learn a lesson You're gonna make it through the darkest night Some people betray one and cause treason We're gonna make everything alright Well the worst of times, now, they don't phase me Even if I look and act really crazy I went way down, she betrayed me Now my vision is no longer hazy I'm very lucky to have my crew They stood by me when she flew I've been knocked out, beat down, black and blue She's not the one coming back for you She's not the o

Rancid - Ruby Soho
Another favourite. Echoes of reggae comin' through my bedroom wall havin' a party up next door but i'm sittin here all alone two lovers in the bedroom and the other starts to shout all i got is this blank stare and that don't carry no clout at all Destination unknown Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho [x2] He's singin and she's there to lend a hand he's seen his name on the marquee but she will never understand once again he's leavin' and she's there with a tear in her eye embraces with a warm gesture it's time, time to say goodbye Destination unknown Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho [x2] Ruby's heart ain't beatin cause she knows the feelin' is gone she's not the only one who knew there's somethin' wrong her lover's in the distance as she wipes a tear from her eye ruby's fading out, she disappears, it's time, time to say goodbye Destination unknown Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho [x2] Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho Ruby ruby ruby ruby soho Ruby ru

Ranch Potatoes And Chicken Casserole
Ranch Potatoes and Chicken Casserole This tasty main dish combines the zesty flavor of ranch potatoes with broccoli and chicken. 1 package Betty Crocker® ranch potatoes 4 slices process American cheese 2 cups cut-up cooked chicken 1 package (9 ounces) Green Giant® frozen cut broccoli, thawed and drained 2 1/4 cups boiling water 1 package (3 ounces) cream cheese, cut into cubes and softened 1. Heat oven to 400ºF. Grease 2-quart casserole. 2. Layer uncooked Potatoes, American cheese, chicken and broccoli in casserole. Stir together Sauce Mix, boiling water and cream cheese in medium bowl; pour over broccoli. 3. Bake uncovered 35 to 40 minutes or until potatoes are tender. Sprinkle with Topping; bake about 3 minutes longer. Let stand 5 minutes.

Rancher
A Montana rancher got in his pickup and drove to a neighboring ranch and knocked at the door. A young boy, about 9, opened the door. 'Is yer Dad home?' the rancher asked. 'No sir, he ain't,' the boy replied. 'He went into town.' 'Well,' said the rancher, 'is yer Mom here?' 'No, sir, she ain 't here neither. She went into town with Dad.' 'How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?' 'He went with Mom and Dad.' The rancher stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other and mumbling to himself. 'Is there anything I can do fer ya?' the boy asked politely. 'I knows where all the tools are, if you want to borry one. Or maybe I could take message fer Dad.' 'Well,' said the rancher uncomfortably, 'I really wanted to talk to yer Dad. It's about your Brother Howard getting my daughter, Pearly Mae, pregnant.' The boy considered for a moment. 'You would have to talk to Pa about that' he finally conceded. 'If it helps you any, I know that Pa charges

Rancour
Sorry world but it’s over now You thought you had me Pulled a fast one somehow That just didn’t work out The way you planned To destroy me Take me out on my own land It won’t work this time Oh no you see Because this time I’m holding on I’ll save my tears for me Because crying over you is pointless I’ll save all my smiles Because unlike you They don’t need a trial I’m keeping my heart to myself You will no longer read my words My fire used to keep you alive Now you will feel its burn You turned your back on me But that’s not what I’ll burn first First it’ll be your heart and your soul I’ll burn your insides Make your blood boil Then once my fires released You’ll skin will burn And fall as ashes at my feet I told you before I’m not gonna sit here and take this I’ll tell you again I will no longer sit here and fake it Fake the smiles Fake the blame Faking my entire

Ranch Chicken Potato Packets
RANCH CHICKEN AND POTATO PACKETSone 20 oz. bag refrigerated cooked new potato wedges6 boneless skinless chicken thighs (about 20 oz.) cut in half1 1/4 cups regular ranch dressing4 slices precooked bacon, chopped1/4 cup chopped green onions (4 medium)1/2 tsp. coarse ground black pepperHeat gas or charcoal grill. Cut four 18x12" sheets of heavy-duty foil, spray foil with cooking spray. For each packet, place about 1 cup potato wedges, 3 thigh halves onto center of foil sheet. Drizzle with scant 1/3 cup dressing. Wrap each packet securely using double-fold seals, allowing room for heat expansion. When grill is heated, place foil packets, seam side up, on gas grill over medium heat or on charcoal grill over medium coals; cover grill. Cool 45-50 minutes or until juice of chicken is clear when center of thickest part is cut, potatoes are tender. Open packets carefully to allow steam to escape. Sprinkle each with bacon, onions, pepper.

Rancor
I sat staring at the purple tint to my glass.Wondering where a series of women from my past were tonight.Some of my usual suspects.Some clawing from the very very far back of my mind.I wondered how my life was by comparison.Dulcet husky taninsbursting, dark after aromathe empty cup of covenant? Maybe I'm the dregs.The broken bits of refuse and process.Just a side effect, a by-product. Am I the stain against the edge? But there's grit too.Trial. Caliber. Tenacity. What was I to them?Full-bodied, half-hearted?Just a hint of danger and a desire for belonging? Did I fall short, dry, sour? Why so manywith so little to show?

Random Thoughts
I see the blog tab. I click......and now it's magic, no? This is a new feature right? I was just thinking that this would be great if it had a blog part and wham......got my b-day wish. WOOHOOO! Okay so I'm slightly hyper from my grape juice. I love Killswitch Engage and Alex is so sexy it kills me. I have tomorrow off thank GOD! I have no more Grape juice. I hate that I'm not sure of everyones intentions here on the site. :( I'm not here to be picked up. I've already been swept off my feet. Thanks for the offer tho.

Random Thoughts About Rolls-royce And Bentley
I've always been a big fan of the Rolls-Royce Silver Spirit/Spur and its sister, the Bentley Mulsanne. These cars began production in 1981. Unfortunately, I have a few complaints about these cars: 1. Up until about the late 1980s, these cars had the homeliest looking steering wheel and steering column I had ever seen in a car. Both the steering wheel and shift indicator look like they came off of a farm tractor. This is inexcusable for a car of this caliber. 2. What is up with the cheesy AC Delco stereo they put in these cars? I believe they started with that in 1985. I’d expect to see a stereo like that in a 1986 Chevy Cavalier, and not a $100,000 car. If that isn't bad enough, a lot of the earlier models (pre 1985'ish) had manual tune radios. That's unforgivable! 3. Although I can’t say for sure since I’ve never actually sat in one, both the Rolls and the Bentley appear to have manual seat recliners. Even my 1984 Lincoln has dual power recliners. How did the engineers at Rol

Random Thoughts
I feel lonely today not much diffrent from any other day really other than I relized something.I am alone yes I have my 2 babies but I have noone for those cold nights to hold close. To have that feeling agin is something I crave more than anything.To have that person look apon you and for you to relize that yes you are loved....someone called here for my ex today made me think wow dumb ass he hasnt lived here for a year then in turn made me think wow its been almost a year sence I have had that want or feeling.He really did break me.I have used men for a time now the way I have seen and have had personal experience with. I thought why get your heart involved get what you want have them be the lucky ones if you decide to speak with them agin. Rude of me yes shilding me from that pain is all I wanted then i see it I can cause that pain in men even though I say what its all about before hand they think yea I will melt her now frozen heart.Its not frozen its broken. how long does it take

Random Funnies
I was sitting in the park the other day, wondering why frisbees get bigger and bigger as they come towards you....and then it hit me. #1 pickup line of all time: "Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you? I heard about this guy who broke into a lion's den at the zoo and got mauled. People were talking about how there should have been better defences put up to prevent people getting into the cage. A friend of mine suggested setting up some kind of deterrent.. For example, putting some sort of fierce animal in the cage, which would attack anybody who climbed in.... If my calculations are correct, and I think they are, SLINKY + ESCULATOR = EVERLASTING FUN Online dating...the rule: "Attractive, single, mentally stable: choose two" I had my portable CD player, and took it in the bathroom with me while I went to pee. And the second I whipped my penis out, the theme song to 'Rocky' started playing. I've never felt more manly than in that moment. In a perfect world

Random Stuff
an up date on my life i met a guy we dated not execlusivly in my eyes and he never sed anything to contridicte this so i was hammered doing things we all do sleep wit sum1 else told sed dating dude and he sed i had broke his heart as he was in love with me bare in mind we had only been on 6 dates at the most and hes 26 i think neway he knew nothing much about me really yet i have broken his heart que me apologising saying i didnt realise he felt that way which is true i didnt or i wudnt have done wot i did was made very clear at the start of the dating i dont have enuff trust to enter into a relationship past relationships have in built a hurt them before they hurt u mins sted never mind went out last nite and got very drunk was a top nite and me twin sis is pregnant shes on here as petal 20rite i need sleep nite nite all

Random Idlings
Have you ever been going along like you usually do and noticed that every one around you is going through what you thought only you go through, only you arent going through it at the moment? Yeah, kinda like that. But this time there is one going through it, and you would give all that you had to take the burdon. Sitting quietly and listening is about the most I can offer. Frustrating and maddening. Not that I am any kind of hero, but I would take her burdon if I could. I grew up surviving, not living. I know how to do it. She has fucking kids! One f the few people I have met in my life that really impacted me. She never made me feel like flavor of the week. She never gave me more than an inch of slack, but treated me like a man. There is a strength in her I admire and wish for myself (although Id never tell her) She knows me inside and out. If I could be half the man she deserves, I would be more successful than I ever dreamed possible. So you can imagine how hard it is to

Random Thoughts About Lc...
Well lets see my first blog...I am really glad I came across LC. I have meet some very interesting people to say the least...a couple of people who no matter how much time goes by I will never be able to forget...one of those people I have alot in commen with...he knows who he is..I just want to thank each & everyone who is in my friends/family, each of u has made some of my days ALOT better...

Random Info
Average number of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime: 7,200 Average number of times he will ejaculate from masturbation: 2,000 Actual amount of semen per ejaculation: 1-2 teaspoons Average total amount of lifetime ejaculate: 14 gallons Average amount of water it takes to fill a bathtub: 35 gallons Average speed of ejaculation: 28 miles per hour Average speed of a city bus: 25 miles per hour Average # of calories in a teaspoon of semen: 7 Average # of calories in a can of Dr. Pepper: 150 Average length of penis when not erect: 3.5 inches Average length when erect: 5.1 inches Smallest natural penis recorded: 5/8 of an inch Largest natural penis recorded: 11 inches Largest penis in the animal kingdom: 11 feet Height from court floor to the rim of a basketball hoop:10 feet Most arousing time of day/season! for a man: early morning/fall Best ways to improve sexual function: quit smoking, start exercising, lose weight.

Random Thoughts
~* just things on my mind, not pertaining to one person. things from past and more current relationships. Some are from my friends past and current relationships too*~ ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ ~the way your look at me says i love you better than saying it 1200 times a day~ ~never hit me...even with words~ ~breaking up with me is easier to handle than cheating~ ~don't bad mouth me to your friends behind my back~ ~don't be jealous of my 1 true male friend, be happy that he's there to protect me when your not around~ ~hold me at night, i sleep better knowing your there~ ~open up to me...it might be the best thing you've ever experienced~ ~let me have my alone time~ ~don't diss me for your friends~ ~don't make me choose you over my true girlfriends..they'll win everytime~ ~don't tell me your interested ...then act a different way~ ~be honest~ ~be yourself...it's who i want to learn more about~ ~always remember my kids will come first...even before myself

Random Survey
RANDOM THINGS YOU MIGHT LIKE TO KNOW... by alwayzhammertimeName? Nicknames?: BrandyBirth date?: 9/14Do you have any siblings? Do you get along with them?: No SiblingsWhat are you wearing right now?: Clothes, DuhWho do you live with?: My Ex-BoyfriendDo you have any pets?: 1 KittyWhat's your favorite food?: Italian and MexicanHey slacker, what's your G.P.A.?: 3.8 in CollegeWhat's your major?: Psychology/Philosophy/EnglishIs your room messy or clean right now?: MessyWhat's your favorite alcoholic drink?: Hypnotiq and Pineapple JuiceWhat's your favorite non-alcoholic drink?: Energy Drinks, Pepsi, Coke, Fruit JuiceHow do you feel about cigarette smoking?: Hate it and I'm allergicIf you don't recognize the number on your caller ID, do you answer?: NopeHow many speeding tickets have you recieved?: Not a oneWhat's your favorite clothing store?: TorridDo you sleep with a stuffed toy? What is it?: NopeWhen was the last time you were on a diet?: NeverOnce you're finished with sc

Random Ass Quiz
1.You and Jesus go out to dinner -do you pay? pretty sure paying isn't the issue 2. You suddenly have to flee the country and adopt an alias. Miguel Coranado 3. Pick one state in the U.S. to get rid of permanently? Vermont...does anyone ever hear anything about them? 4. You wake up as the opposite gender what's the one thing you wanna do? play with the boobies of course...just like every other guy would 5. Luke Skywalker or Han Solo? Solo...Skywalker had a thing for his sis 6. Toy you always wanted but never got as a child? TMNT Blimp...got it but had to be returned...wish I had gotten another one v_v 7. Top three celebrities you want to meet.... (opposite sex)?: Alyssa Milano, Giselle, Milla Jovovich 8. What's an automatic deal breaker in a potential significant other? lying/cheating 9. What is the last movie you saw that actually scared you? Emily Rose I guess...only because I went out at 3AM and looked up one night...freaked me a bit 10. Stupidest

Random Poems
Thinking Of You I sit in my room thinking of you, Hoping that you're thinking of me I really don't know what I'll do I guess I'll just have to wait and see I wish & pray you didn't go away, I wish & pray that you were near, I really wish & pray that you would of stayed To chase away the harm and fear I lay in bed wondering what you're thinking of I guess I'll never know And Here I am thinking of love Thinking how I loved / love you so I sit / lay here remembring of the day we met Knowing that's something I'll never forget you For My Friend Across the miles You touched my life, Opened my eyes, and Filled my empty heart Strangers, yet friends, Our spirits reach out, Always touching, never apart You in the north, Me in the south, Never together, Never apart A True Friend We Met Upon The internet, My heart you did have. I sit and wait each day, For the song my Heart will soon play. Of laughter, love and tears, You have washed away all m

Random Thoughts
Why do so many " outgoing " people have profiles on dating websites such as match, or true and stuff like that. I mean, since how they are so outgoing, why don't they just go out and talk to a bunch of different people and date them and find someone that way? Do you really need to take out a personal ad if you really are that outgoing? Maybey they are just bored and want to see who responds or something. I'm not outgoing. I need to find someone else who isn't outgoing. I don't really like to go out too much. It's fun for me to just sit around and play video games, or go to a park and play basketball, or hackey. I like doing things. I just don't like being around alot of people. And I don't usually enjoy talking to people. That's what I think of when I see the word outgoing. Someone who will go out and go up and talk to people. I don't do that much. I just don't usually feel like talking to people. I don't like the sound of my own voice. Most people don't understand what

Random Thoughts
Yay, no survey today!! This is something I wrote in my myspace blog on August 2nd, 2006, but I think it applies now also. I'm really tired of hurting other people unintenionally. I'm really tired of missunderstandings. I'm really tired of being ignored. I'm really tired of waiting I'm really tired of being bitched out. I'm really tired of the pain that I feel. I'm really tired of being in the dark about how certain people feel. Just random thoughts that came into my head. I'm really tired of being confused I'm really tired of being lonely I'm really tired of being hated I'm really tired of loving people who don't love me back I'm tired of not knowing the answers I'm tired of not asking the right questions I'm tired of caring so much I'm sorry for being emo everyone, but I just have a lot of shit in my head right now, and this is about the only way I can express it.

Randy Watson Attends Passion Party...nuff Said
Sexual Chocolate Attends Passion Party...Nuff Said! Current mood: horny Passion Party? Me? Invited? Aren't these only for women who sit around talking about lubes, creams, lotions, toys, dildos and all kinds of other unimaginable things? Why in the hell would I go? Why in the hell would they invite me? 11 women? Alcohol? Talking about sex? Haha your boy Randy Watson was gonna be on time for that. This would be the first Passion Party that I was invited to that I wasn't having one on one in my room or some hotel somewhere. Hahahaha. So I arrive at my friend's house and a few of the ladies are already there. I receive a couple of stares as I enter, but my friend assures them that they'll appreciate why I came later. I meet my friend's boss, an older woman with a bit of a mean streak but we sit down and chat for a minute. I pour myself a margarita. The woman gets offended because she thinks that I called her old, and I did not in fact call her old, I merely exclaimed, "Oh lord...

Randomness
NINE last things you did 9. last place you were: Work 8. last hug: Mum 7. last beverage: Water 6. last movie watched: The Last Temptation Of Christ (it was fucking crap!) 5. last phone call: My brother 4. last cd played: Mixed cd of songs that remind me of the good things from this summer 3. last bubble bath: years ago 2. last time you cried: yesterday morning 1. last alcohol drink: Smirnoff Ice EIGHT have you evers 8. have you ever dated someone twice: nope 7. have you ever BEEN cheated ON: nope...not that i know of anyway 6. have you ever kissed someone: ...does being forced to kiss someone count? or spin the bottle?? 5. have you ever kissed someone you regret: Well as i was forced to then yes 4. have you ever fallen in love: I thought i did in 2003 but im not sure now...but my current situation is looking very good 3. have you ever lost someone: yes 2. have you ever been depressed: i am now 1. have you ever been drunk and thrown up: drunk yes but thrown up becuas

Random Friendship
A Friendship Poem At Random It was at random that we met, A chance that not many get. When I heard the "Uh Oh", How was I to know! That you would turn out to be my special friend, Someone who could be there, Until the end. No matter how I feel or what I do, I know, in my heart, That I can count on you. I've never seen you, Heard you, or touched you. Those kind of chances are very few. To meet someone from far away, Never knowing if they're here to stay, Not knowing if what they say is true, Of what they're doing and telling you. So far away, but yet so near, The "not knowing" is the fear. Is it truth, or is it lies? Will a heart grow, or will it die? Either way, the bonds of Friendship's strings are tied. One's needs are met, Some with regret. Some with hope, Some with pain. But still, the answer is plain. If we hadn't met, On that very day, Things would be different In every way. The emptiness may be filled, A life may start to rebu

Random Thoughts
I read a bulletin today about different things but something in it reached out to me about how there are some who leave messages and comments and post bulletins but no one ever reads them...no one bothers to reply...ever wonder why...I do. I for example have 11 blogs posted they have had 112 views out of all the people on the LC yet the only one person that ever really says anything about them is my best friend Tink....there have been one or two other people who post a randome comment but out of 112 views that's it. People put themselves out there for the world to see...some of us are sincere...and others well lets just say they are not so sincere.... Are we as a society so stuck on the superficial on wrapping rather than what is inside the package that we are willing to let something great or someone great pass us by...never knowing what footprints they might have left in our lives... I am a wiccan and I believe that people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a l

Random Thoughts
As the sun in the sky shines so does my love for you. The sun is eternal as is my love. They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Some only see the outter beauty that fades over time. The few that see the inner beauty are graced with a vision of beauty that lasts forever. Life ends when you stop dreaming. Hope ends when you stop believing. Love ends when you stop caring. Friendship ends when you stop sharing. To love without condition. To talk without intention. To give without reason. To care without expectation, is the heart of a true friend. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart. A Wish I lie on the ground, and stare into space, the stars start to move, into the shape of your face. I see you there now, looking down at me, with that cute little smile, that I like to see. You say "close your eyes", "tell me what you see", I see only two people, just you and me. We're walking the shoreline, with our feet getting wet, the horizon turns

Random Thoughts At 8am Of A Mind With No Cigs...
Ya'll ever feel like no matter how hard ya try things never work out? Now one person in particular may think this is aimed at them and it slightly is but only on a small scale (like 30%) the primary point I'm trying to make here is simply that I pour alot of myself into goals but they never get done. It doesn't help tha some of my goals rely souly on others but....fuck...you get the damn idea.

Random Poetry
Waiting here For nothing at all Lifes on still Look at that Thats all there is point and laugh Funny to see Someone like me Out here like this Out there Alone point and laugh Point your crooked little finger Laugh your broken laugh Broken like me Spit your blood out The blood from your veins Life rejected by you Watch me break you Break you down Like you deserve Like you did to me Watch me drain your blood Drink it fast Clench my thirst To break you Grin your stupid broken smile Watch your life spew out of you Spew into me Filling my life back up Giving me what I lost to you I want it all back I'll suck it out of you Watch me as I sit here Waiting for my time My time to laugh and point The time is almost here You life is almost gone Give me back mine Give me back mine The time is here, this time I'll point and laugh ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Submission that's what I felt. When I gave into your lie

Random Lyrics
Okay...so this song is runnin through my head today... Maniac Michael Sembello Just a small town girl on a Saturday night lookin' for the fight of her life In the real-time world no one sees her at all They all say she's crazy Locking rhythms to the beat of her heart Changing woman into life She has danced into the danger zone When a dancer becomes a dance It can cut you like a knife If the gift becomes the fire On a wire between will and what will be She's a maniac, maniac on the floor And she's dancing like she's never danced before She's a maniac, maniac on the floor And she's dancing like she's never danced before On the ice-build iron sanity is a place most never see It's a hard warm place of mystery Touch it, but can't hold it You work all your life for that moment in time It could come or pass you by It's a push of the world, but there's always a chance If the hunger stays the night There's a cold connective heat, Struggling, stretching

Random Crrrrrrap
A mama dying Lil baby crying It's sad we got all these crazy things But the churches still sing This be making a girl wanna think Sometimes when I awake I don't even wanna blink But I know I gotta awake A city girl CAN'T be fake Yeah, we walking. Walking down this narrow street Man, this is a win or lose thing And there's a good chance you gonna get beat Now we unload, We unload up into this life It's sad that little kids feel the need to carry a knife Gangster, yeah man, they really don't care Alway offering you to "sniff this right here"? But why take that dare I'm sorry But that's all I got to say Keep in your thoughts, And have a nice day

Randomness Of Penguins Wont Be The Last To Come Either Lol
A. Social behavior 1. Penguins are among the most social of all birds. All species are colonial to some degree (del Hoyo, et al., 1992). 2. Penguins may swim and feed in groups, but some may be solitary when diving for food. Emperor penguins have been observed feeding in groups with coordinated diving (Marchant, 1990). 3. During the breeding season some species come ashore and nest in huge colonies called rookeries. Some rookeries include hundreds of thousands of penguins and cover hundreds of square kilometers (Marchant, 1990). 4. Penguins exhibit intricate courting and mate-recognition behavior. Elaborate visual and vocal displays help establish and maintain nesting territories (Marchant, 1990). 5. Although king penguins are highly gregarious at rookery sites throughout the year, they usually travel in small groups of 5 to 20 individuals (Marchant, 1990). 6. Penguins communicate by vocalizing and performing physical behaviors called "displays." They use many vo

A Random Verse Cometh
a random verse cometh she sits down and cries ..shes not over it she lays down and dies . her life is torn apart killer in disguise.lost his soul that day somthing in his eyes he,s lost without a heart i know at night he cries and prays to nobody . i guess my writing is odd i cant find a balance life is unbalanced man no right no wrong lies that tear us apart we where doomed from the start ..dont fight it just let it go because in this life ... u just never know - me -

Random Verses Not Connected
m your victim im your prize i am no-one in your eyes im a prophet im a beast im the star that shines in the east nobody ever told me how am i supossed to know i,ll spend this life alone ill spend it with my soul cuz one day u will realize that u where never meant to be so slit your wrists and walk with me this is my broken dream Our minds are torn apart by jealousy and broken trust my hate i give to u .. my soul i do intrust my way is to forgive you my wish is to see u die my state is to enlighten you my life will make u cry someday when u find out i tryed and got found out so open ur mind to the answers and let my death set u free im sorry that i left you but i just dont want to be me in love and death -stoned-

Random Verses
they tear at your very heart with the stake that u made she thinks shes innocint she should be fuckin ashamed he never should have worried bout the things that her mind hurried.. and now its to late and its over im dead.ur dead and so is ur lover ........ maybe i,ll die tonight and you,ll regret tomorrow maybe ill try tonight and deal with ur sorrow we fly at night on these wings that we borrowed we take no delight in those souls we have slaughtered my aim is to pray in my dyeing ashtray my goal is to never love you my ambition is dead and its gone to my head they say love can never hurt you .. ......... i want to tear apart my broken bloody heart my reasons are pure and thats a start give me wings and red flaming sword i want to kill in the name of our lord will u goto hell if i ask you will hang from a upon my noose theres something bad inside of me and ur lies just let it loose all the hate i have is all that uve ever given me i bleed on my g

Random Verses I Scribbled
come in from the wilderness come here and watch me die i,ll steal you with my thoughts my motive is to cry with an angel by my side my soul is lost and all hope is gone hold my hand and die with me in the morning sun dress in black and cry for me my apocalypse has begun ....... hope comes in strange forms a serial killer alone at dawn he used to watch trains go by once innocint forever lost born evil or a product of society a weeping widow a quit place to die! .......

Random
DO YOU EVER MISS SOMEONE SO BAD YOU WANT TO DIE? WHEN YOU LOSE SOMEONE WHO IS THE ONE PERSON THAT WILL LOVE YOU 4EVER? DOES IT EVER GET EASIER THE 2ND TIME AROUND..WHY IS IT WHEN YOU LOSE SOMEONE YOU LOVE YOUR WHOLE LIFE CAN FALL APART..I LOST MY MOM GOING ON 5 YEARS I WANTED TO DIE WHEN SHE DIED AND I ALMOST DID MY WHOLE WORLD FELL APART..I LOST EVEYTHING MY FAMILY I HAD WORKED SO HARD TO KEEP TOGETHER MY 1ST LOVE OF 20 YEARS ..WALKED OUT AND LEFT ME FOR ANOTHER MY POOR CHILDREN THE HELL THEY WENT THRO WATCHING MY WORLD FALL APART WHILE SO HARD TRYING TO KEEP OUR FAMILY TOGETHER WITH OUT ANYHELP FROM THE TWO PEOPLE WHO BRANG THEM INTO THE WORLD ..I HOPE ONE DAY MY CHILDREN WILL UNDERSTAND WHY MY MOMS DEATH HAD SUCH A AFFECT ON ME THAT WE ALL LOST EVERYTHING AND I HOPE I CAN MAKE IT UP TO THEM ALL I CAN DO IS TRY..ITS FUNNY HOW A SONG OR A SMELL CAN BRING BACK A FLOOD OF MEMORIES NO MATTER IF THERE BAD OR GOOD ..

Random Thoughts
So you've all asked what is on my mind this morning? Well I guess no one actually has but I'm in a blog mood. So you go to bed at 3:30 in the morning after having a conversation with someone you are interested in and you just sit there thinking about them and finally are able to go to sleep. Then your friend calls you at 7:30 and you awake out of your deep sleep and he says hey man, was hoping you wouldn't answer the phone. What the hell am I supposed to do? Phone rings and I answer it. What kind of pic should I post next? Not like I take the greatest pics but trying to think what I could do. Well that is all I've got for now. Check back later I'm sure I will have something to talk about after tonight.

Random Thoughts Of A Twisted Mind
There I was, knee deep in hand grenade pins. Charley was all around me, movin' in fast! All I had was a broken rifle and a P38 to protect me (for all you civilian types, a P38 is an Army issue can opener). I had to improvise... I still have nightmares about that poor monkey...

Random Musings About School Shootings
I just read that another kid fired a weapon inside yet another school. This time it was a kid in Missouri who fired an assault rifle inside his middle school. Now, when I say that I read this, what I mean is that I read only the headline. I don't know if anyone was injured or killed. I assume there were no injuries or fatalities, though. I guess that would have been mentioned in the headline if there were. No, I saw only the headline and a picture of a shocked-looking mother standing outside the school building. I don't suppose I really even need to read the story. I mean, I think we all know it, by now. And this is actually the fourth incident of it's kind in about ten days, I think. Did you ever notice how these school shootings always seem to happen in clusters, like that? It's an interesting phenomenon. I guess it's probably not even true. My brain registers it like that. Maybe it makes it easier to process. . . Sort of turning it into a freak phenomenon, like a to

Random Funny Quiz
Your Pornstar Name is: Xion Knight Take this quiz at QuizUniverse.com WHAT AN ENTERTAINING QUIZ....I THOUGHT YOUR PORN NAME WAS YOUR FIRST PETS NAME AND THE FIRST STREET YOU LIVE ON....IF THAT WERE THE CASE I'D BE CLEO MALLARD....

Random Thought
When my older friends told me I would go through some massive changes when I hit age thirty, I thought, "Yeah, whatever." Well, they were right. To the ladies reading this right now who haven't hit this pentacle age, trust me, you'll understand one day. When you reach you're thirties, you become more relaxed with your life. You learn to choose your battles with friends. You have mature disagreements with your boyfriend. You don't care if your co-workers are gossiping about you. And you begin to cherish those simple moments you spend with your family. You begin to come into yourself as a woman. You become more comfortable with your body. You no longer notice or worry about every flaw. You don't care so much if he thinks you're sexy because you feel sexy. You become more confident, sexually. You're no longer afraid to have sex with the lights on. That's probably the area a woman changes most in as she gets older. Suddenly she's not afraid of her sexuality. She knows what she li

Randomness On Friday
I'm surviving today with gloves, a heater and a sweater. Yet no one seems to realize that we shouldn't have to do this in the front office. Course, at this rate I'm gonna say if I have to provide my own heat then I ought to at least be able to listen to my own music at my desk. Bleah. Other than that things are going well. No one has died. My family and friends are healthy. That sort of thing. I have no real complaints besides the whole being cold at work thing. Oh, and I would just like to say that I have found two things today that others deemed impossible to find in our new system. I am the Queen of Searches!!! It's kinda neat to find something that everyone else has given up on. Go me! Okay, yeah, so I take pleasure in the little things. And I'd like our server to decide if it wants to work or not. This on and off again crap is really messing with me and the things I need to get done.

Random
chaos in death, chaos in life. all we are are cess pools for chaos and rage, we are the disease, we are the carriers of the apocolypse. one day we will be mankinds greatest threat, and the only way to deal with it is to get rid of that threat, and by that way of thinking we are even greater a threat to ourselves, so we are chaos embodied, and the apocolypse reincarnated I am randomness embodied today, and everything I do comes from this deamon within who touches every part of my soul. my heart and body cry out that this is normal, and so I continue to be random, I am chaos, I am the anti everything. nothing is as bad as me, yet I am nothingness, I am nothing, a small speck in this world, I am nothing in the face of history help me, don't help me, come hold me, stay away from me I am diseased, I am unclean, I don't know what I am or who I am, what am I where am I I am randomness I am chaos. I am the end of the world

Random
A woman stands, a man behind her. She may know him, she may not. It doesn’t even matter. He steps close to her, and she can feel his body against hers. His hands move to touch her elbows. She doesn’t pull away, and he slides his hands up and down, feeling the length of her arms. He moves closer, settles, until the contours of his body align with hers. With one hand he brushes the hair away from her neck. Her sensual neck. She feels his hands around her waist, holding her to him. She feels his lips on her skin, below her ear, as his hands slide up, slowly, to her breasts. They are a fetish for him, and she can feel him growing behind her. He wants her. His hands massage her breasts as he continues to taste the sweetness of the flesh of her neck. His breathing slows, becoming deeper, stronger. More…primal. More…intent full. One hand slides down and under the bottom of her shirt, for the first touch against her skin. His tongue traces the outline of her neck, as his other hand holds

Randomness
Sometimes I just like to put out there random thoughts......here are some... 1. Bar + Alcohol + Friends = FUN!! 2. Why is it when you are missing someone is when you can't get ahold of them? 3. Cell phones are cool......unless you don't want to be found... 4. I love beer.... 5. Why is it when someone asks if you have yahoo, you say yes, go there and the first thing they wanna know is if you have a cam and what you are wearing? Does no one just wanna talk anymore? 6. Rum---not just for pirates anymore 7. Don't ask if you really don't want to know...

99 Random Facts??
99 things bout myself 1. Full Name: Anna Jane Warrington 2. Nicknames: Johnny/Crazy Eye Johnny 3. Birthday: 29th Jan 4. Place of Birth: Burton On Trent 5. Zodiac Sign: Aquarius 6. Male or female: Female 7. Grade: I dont technically have one anymore but its the same as year 13 8. School: Burton College 9. Occupation: Student 10. Residence: Barton 11. MSN Screen Name: Crazy Eye Johnny!!! AFI Kicked Ass!!! OMG You Have A HUUUUGE Pen!! __Your Appearance___ 12. Hair Colour: Dark Blonde 13. Hair Length: shortish 14. Eye colour: Blue 15. Weight: 7 stone 10 16. Height: 5ft 5 ish 17. Braces? Yup 18. Glasses? Yes 19. Piercings: Nope 20. Tattoos: Not yet 21. Righty or Lefty: Righty ___Your 'Firsts'___ 22. First best friend: Oh man i cant remember Hayley possibly 23. First Award: Bravery Award in hospital 24. First Sport You Joined: Does Country Dancing count?? 25. First pet: Dishy!!! the fish lol 26. First Real Vacation: I think it was Spain somewhere and

99 Random Facts
99 things bout myself 1. Full Name: Dustin Allen Clemons 2. Nicknames: Penguin/Hey You/Fatass rofl 3. Birthday: July 5th 4. Place of Birth: Woodriver 5. Zodiac Sign: Cancer 6. Male or female: Male 7. Grade: none. graduated 2005 8. School: none 9. Occupation: none lol but looking 10. Residence: Highland 11. MSN Screen Name: NarcoLeptic *you can love someone without saying a word* __Your Appearance___ 12. Hair Colour: Dark Brown 13. Hair Length: shortish need a haircut 14. Eye colour: Brown 15. Weight: 230.. woo.. 16. Height: 6'0" 17. Braces? Nope 18. Glasses? Yes 19. Piercings: Nope 20. Tattoos: Not yet 21. Righty or Lefty: Righty ___Your 'Firsts'___ 22. First best friend: Martin.. lol.. back in 3rd grade 23. First Award: "most improved" in middle school 24. First Sport You Joined: never did.. unless Choir's a sport? 25. First pet: Smokey the kitten I had in Oregon 26. First Real Vacation: Black River MO 27. First Concert: never been to one 28. Firs

Random Thoughts
If we as americans are so smart why do the people of the U.S. follow their leaders so blindly? I can see what our leaders are doing,can you? If we dont stop the BS in Washington we will have no freedoms or liberties. Anyone who belives in Bush is a total idiot. I support our troops, not our president. He never should have been alloud to be president,he is a total idiot. The worst part is americans are going along with his dictatorship.He says do it congress jumps.I'm sorry but I thought there was supposed to be separation of powers.Not ok dugh!

Random Thoughts Of A 6:30am Mind...
So been a little depressed due to the weather. May lose our power but not if the great assassin of many skills asleep on the couch has anything to say about it. Been nostalgic most of the day...that 3 month period where I was an alcoholic wasn't that bad I guess...I got good memories out of it...semi-good...been wanting to write poetry and can spout it off in my head but my heart won't let me type it. Mostly cause I'm not trying to be "that guy" anymore. Been thinking alot of someone...it still hurts every once in awhile but I'm getting better. Think I may finally have the back cover for the first book if any of you still care about that. I wouldn't blame you if you didn't, its been so long I've almost lost interest. Anyway that's my random thoughts for the day. hope you enjoyed...

Random Shit
Well its been awhile since I have joined here and now I will do this. Hasn't been much to say about anything really. Two weeks ago at a show for IPW (International Pro Wrestling) in Chesterfield,Indiana, I worked a 5 way hardcore match. Well long story short, I took a shot to the head with a speed limit sign. I lost feeling in my arms, neck and parts of my back. I laid there motionless till the match was over and then was helped to the back, then I was looked at by someone and she suggested I go to the ER. I went to the ER and had a CT scan and MRI done to check for any damage. After like 6 hours or so I think, the verdict is a severe cervical sprain. I was lucky, they originally thought I broke my c1 vertabrae. Last weekend, 1 week to the day of the last show, I wrestled for RCCW in Richmond,Indiana and won their Indiana Championship belt from R.A.W. Other then that shit, nothing much is going on. Lattaz!

Random Thoughts
1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't. 2. I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it. 3. I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me! 4. Some people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them. 5. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. 6. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. 7. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me. 8. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. 9. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. 10. I'm not a complete idiot--Some parts are missing. 11. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. 12. Nyquil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine. 13. God must love stupid; He made so many. 14. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. 15. Consciousness: That annoying time betwe

Random Entry
HI, this will be a random entry...Just letting you know what I did to my lost cherry page. I added a music clip + more info on my intrest's also I added blinkies to my about me. And I added a new pic folder called me goffing of on cam with (8) new pics taking today. Please go rate and comment. I Love Ya All Bunches

Random Thoughts
Given the events of the years previous, it is hard not to see things in quite a different light. (Know what I mean?) Take, for example, a monotonous drive home from a day of work. I'm sure the desire to work has been greatly overcome by a desire to spend time in quiet introspection, but life must go on. While absorbed in this very introspection on the way home, things begin the gradual recession into a soft, warm blur. You barely even notice the time fly by as you instinctually head along the same route you've no doubt taken hundreds of times. Although the radio drones on and on, you barely even hear it as you sit alone in your thoughts. Up ahead you see the yellow of the stoplight and gently apply pressure to the breaks without so much as giving it a second thought. Rolling to a stop at the head of the intersection just as the light changes to red you find yourself staring, almost mesmerized by the intense red of the light. As countless thoughts clamor inside your head, you cannot hel

Random Rampage
I've come to love LC so much. Ok I'm addicted. There are a few things that bug me about this place so instead of throwing rant out on a bulletin I'll keep it here. First WTF is with all the fake profiles???!! Honestly I don't really give a shit who's on top or who's first or who has a family name on the LC I DON'T CARE! I don't give a shit if you rate my profile a 1 or a 10 It's nice to build up points but whatever. I just enjoy bullshitting with people on the LC. Thats what I thought the LC is about building distant friendships. Helping others out. Not bashing on one another for cam whore or blah blah blah that shit gets old. Do me a favor if I go into your profile and rate or comment do the same would ya. The guys on the LC are screwed. We will never compete in points or photos. Why cause a lot of the time it's one sided guys rate the girls and girls just take the guys for granted although were the ones giveing you those 10's to get you to were you are. Lastly BE NICE TO ONE ANO

Random Thoughts
These are a few comments/conversations that have made me think a little more about my life and how I view others...here they are: 1. Life Happens...not shit happens but life - because not everything that happens in our lives in bad or shitty...life itself is always happening wether we want it to or not. It is in how we deal with what is happening in our lives that matters. Think about it...LIFE HAPPENS...plain and simple 2. There is no such thing as a dysfunctional person or family. In reality, everyone is functioning the best they can at the level that they are on...wether you are a homeless person on the street with a mental disorder; a family suffering with alcoholism or some other trauma or tragedy; a high-powered executive who is trying to cope with the power of his career; or an average person/family who is/are trying to deal with everyday life...all of these people are functioning the best they can at the level they are at. Just because someone is not functioning at the le

Random Words
Here I sit before this computer. Watching the letters turn to words. My tired eyes phasing in and out. I sit and think what to write about. So rather than be creative as I should, I simply write what I do. My mind is weary as my eyes blurr. My heart hurts as my body aches. But it doesnt make much diffrence, I know my emotions continue to stir. I think I'll fail. I think I'll never be good enough. But it doesnt matter what this test does say. For in my own weary mind and blurred vision, Im just enough. .::. Loyal .::.

Random Thoughts
THIS IS NOT REALLY A POEM..JUST RANDOM THOUGHTS THAT WENT THROUGH MY MIND... I FEEL YOUR LOVE IN THE GENTLE BREEZES, BLOWING THROUGH MY HAIR. IN THE SOFT GENTLE KISS OF SUNSHINE ON MY CHEEK ON THE FIRST DAY OF SPRING. IN THE GENTLY FALLING RAIN AS I CLOSE MY EYES AND IMAGINE YOU AND I DANCING A LOVERS DANCE.I FEEL YOUR LOVE SURROUND ME WHEN I DRIFT OFF TO SLEEP AT NIGHT AS YOU WRAP YOUR ARMS AROUND ME SO MANY MILES AWAY. I LONG TO FEEL YOUR FINGERS TOUCH MY LIPS, MY FACE, MY HAIR. I LONG TO FEEL YOUR LIPS ON MINE AND ON MY SKIN, MY NECK, MY BREASTS, MY FINGERTIPS. I LONG TO HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS AND TO LAY IN YOURS AT THE END OF A LONG HARD DAY. AND FIND COMFORT AND SOLITUDE IN YOUR ARMS. YOUR SOUL COMPLETES MINE AND YOUR HEART BEATING WITH MINE MAKES ME FEEL WHOLE. I KNOW WITHOUT A DOUBT THAT YOU ARE MY SOUL-MATE. THAT ONE PERSON IN THIS LIFE THAT WILL MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I AM NOT BROKEN, THAT I AM NOT TAINTED. I CAN BE MYSELF WITH YOU. YOU KNOW ALL THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT

Randomness
hmmmm ever tried those new Hershey Kisses filled with peanut butter? Just my opinion but eating these has to be chemically the same as having an orgasm. My toes are curling Remember: The American Revolution would never have happened with gun control. Criminals love gun control - it makes their jobs safer. Here's something to think about: A woman raped and strangled is morally superior to a woman with a smoking gun and a dead rapist at her feet. DOES THAT MAKE SENSE?

Random Pictures.
First of all, "pics" make that nerve at the back of my neck cramp up. can nerves cramp up? You know what I mean. Secondly, or second of all, galleries that contain "random pics" make me wonder just how random they are. Like you hit "upload picture" and then just clicked all willy-nilly around your computers file system hoping to randomly select a picture for upload. Willy once touched Nilly in a most private place. Willy got his privates cut off by Mr. Lawman.

Random
You are 53% evil You are very evil. You are fairly practical in your evil deeds and you probably wouldn’t do anything illegal. You are more inclined to not do anything when you see that something bad is about to happen. Think Seinfeld. Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Random Poetry Of Mine
"BITTER" Bitter. Like the voice of myself. Full of anger and malice. Let there be chance, Where there is only ingnorance. Rise from the ashes of bliss, And bring down those who appose. Bitter. Like the soul within me. Full of hate and fury. Let there be revenge, Where there is only emptiness. Rise from the battered skin, And be reborn. Bitter. I hear the symphony arise. Shed the disguise. You simply are. Keep the monsters in Underneath my skin I feel them tear and bite Trying to ruin my site -Beautiful when you look at me -I see what things could be -I fight to keep them down -As I wear the demon crown A waterfall of blood It pours out like a flood I try to take a stand But my battle is a little bland -Decrepid thoughts of you -I never know what the fuck do to -I claw you're face away -I struggle to keep you're touch at bay I'm a slave to you're humiliation Fuck you're reiteration Just stop this please Put it all at ease -Little frai

34 Random Questions
1. Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours? no1 thats stupid lol 2. Who do you blame for your mood today? the alarm clock lol 3. Have you ever seen a dead body? Yea 4. What should we do with stupid people? I'm the wrong person to ask 5. How long do you think you will live? lol i hope 4 a while 6. What was the first thing you did this morning? took a shower 7. The color of carpet in your bedroom? Beige 9. Last person you went out to dinner with? anna, arielle, and lur 10. Are you spoiled? lol yea 11. Do you drink lots of water? No 12. What toothpaste do you use? colgate 13. How do you vent your anger? write 14. The last compliment you received? "good job u fucked up" hehe im used to those 15. Do you look more like your mother or father? daddy 16. When was the last time you threw up? summer? 17. Is your best friend a maneating ant-eater? uh nope i dont think she is 18. What theme does your room have? metal bands 19

Random So Take It
You scored as U ROCK!!!!!!!. U ROCK!!!!WHAT MORE CAN BE SAID.(PLEASE RATE AND TAKE MY OTHER QUIZZES THANKYOU)COOL!!!!!20%U ROCK!!!!!!!20%CHAV LOSER!!!!!!10%Your like me!!!!!10%RANDOM!!!!(SO TAKE IT)created with QuizFarm.com

Random Thoughts For April 5th
Today after being outside for little more than an hour a memory sparked in me. Those of you who know me best know my memories hardly exist so when I have one its rare. I remembered..I love the outside. So I went outside. Hacked at a tree for 25 mins. Started an irragation route for my future farm plot and to help with the flooding that's been a problem but then fate had to rear its ugly head in the form of a god damn tree root*balls fist* Years ago when I was younger that tree was a close friend but now it serves as a reminder of my vendetta. As of tommorow war is declared and I will not stop until there is no signs of the root remaining. After getting quite dirty and smelling from being covered in continously sumped water/mud I decided to bathe in the drainage ditch. Not wise you say? (Those who know me explain to em why it doesn't matter with me*winks*) It was cold but not too cold and quite invigorating. And it's not like the water is dirty, you can see right through it. So thanks t

Random Questions Follow Up
So the question was posed to me what are my dreams and aspirations? I find that the question is very appropriate for the change in my life recently. So I guess the first thing would be to finish off my divorce and move on. Then I would love to find someone who is truly into me and wants just me in a relationship. Then I want to get my CPA license and then become a certified fraud examiner so that I can achieve my career goal of working in Forensic Accounting. Then of course I want to be able to travel. I've done some traveling but I want to go to Egypt in particular as that has always been my dream. I also would love to go to the Bahamas, Hawaii, Florida and Costa Rica. Perhaps move out of Arizona eventually but I love it here compared to Oregon. Those are the absolutes in my life before I die. There are others but nothing else as major as the above.

Random Things O0 Naughty Naughty =p~
I took these quizzes thanks to my sister Bree wo0p ty sis! Jennifer -- [noun]:A perma-orgasm 'How will you be defined in the sexual dictionary?' at QuizUniverse.com You have a sexual IQ of 133 When it comes to sex, you are a super genius. You have had a lot of experience, and sex interests you so you know a lot about it. You pride yourself on being a source of information and guidance to all of your friends. Take this quiz at QuizUniverse.com Using your hands Your sexual hidden talent is your ability to use your hands. You are damn good with them, and know how to make your lover feel incredibly sexy with just one caress. Take this quiz at QuizUniverse.com You are charming. You are very bright, and able to completely express yourself verbally. You have a lot of charisma and people are naturally attracted to you. 'What is your seduction style?' at QuizUniverse.com The porno of Marrrvelous's life will be called ... "Victory on Mount Ve

Random Survey
If we were alone in a room for 24 hours, what would you do? Would you: 1) stay in the corner and not talk to me 2) Sit with me and talk it up 3) Make out with me 4) Cuddle with me 5) Sleep with me (no sex) 6) Suck my huge cock 7) Let me eat you out 8) Let me fuck the day lights out of you I appreciate the feedback

50 Random Questions
1. Where were you 3 hours ago? playing yahtzee with andy 2. Who are you in love with? some retard better known as my husband 3. Have you ever eaten a crayon? probably 4. Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you? my vagina 5. When is the last time you went to the mall? its been a long ass time 6. Are you wearing socks right now? no 7.Do you have a car worth over $2,000? yes 8. When was the last time you drove out of town? about a month ago 9. Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days? i havent been to a movie in years 10. Are you hot? im the hottest fat chick i know 11. What was the last thing you had to drink? orange soda 12. What are you wearing right now? black pants and a brown lacy tank top 13. Do you wash your car or let the car wash do it? neither my husband does it 14. Last food that you ate? salad with carrots, cucumbers, red onions and cheddar cheese 15. Where were you last week at this time? home 16. Have yo

Random Babblings
As the days pass my giddiness grows. I cannot wait to get the fuck out of asscrack, oklahoma. I'm taking my daughter to the airport to meet her father on saturday. I'm happy that he's going to get to spend time with her but i'm upset that i won't see her for a month. It's really for the best, though. I really wasn't looking forward to making a 1400 mile trip with an 11 month old. My mother is pretty much giving me the silent treatment, like that's supposed to be a punishmen?? Yeah right... I really ought to be packing but i am like the world's worst for procrastinating. but it's not like i have much stuff to begin with... I've been talking to this really hot guy from scotland. OMG! he's got long hair, nice body and he talks like sean connery. i'm seriously trying to lure him over here so that i can make him my love slave. It's like the man just walked out of one of my fanticies... I finally got word from the airforce that i'm being permanatly discharged. I've been on temporary retireme

Random Things About The Dragon
More Insite as to who the Dragon is Enjoy. TEN Random Things About Me: 10. I snore when I sleep. The deeper my sleep the louder the snore. 9. I awake very easily if I feel threatened. 8. Work is what I live for. 7. I truly believe in Karma and Yin and Yang. 6. I dream on owning a Movie theatre that shows Asian Films and Anime. 5. I want to own a house that has a large enough basement to have a Mini Movie theatre in it. 4. I’ve had my car for almost 4 years and I still wont let anyone else drive it. 3. I feel no emotions at all when at a funeral of a loved one. 2. Some might say I’m very Over protective of various members of my family and friends. 1. I sometimes feel like I’m not living up to my potential. NINE ways to win my heart: 9. Don’t try to take advantage of me. 8. Honesty 7. Can hold your own in a conversation of many different topics. 6. Love to hold hands and cuddle. 5. Don’t try to change everything about me. 4. Get along with my inner circle of friends

Randomness!
As we grow up, we learn that even one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will.You will have your heart broken probably more than once an it's harder every time.You 'll break hearts too,so remember how it felt when yours was broken.You'll fight with your bestfriend,You'll blame a new love for the things an old one did.You'll cry because time is passing to fast,an you'll eventually loose someone you love.So take too many pictures,laugh too much,an love like you've never been hurt because every 60 seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back!Now one can make me laugh,make me smile make me cry or drive me mad like he does it's like a curse that is the cure,better or worse one things for sure ,it's real love an I don't know what I'd do If I lost it there ya have My first blog enjoy!