Fubar Blog Posts 2

Things To Say When You're Stressed At Work!
Things To Say When You're Stressed at Work... 1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you!!! 2. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing?! 3. How many times do I have to flush before you go away? 4. Well this day was a total waste of make-up. 5. Well aren't we a bloody ray of sunshine? 6. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after. 7. Do I look like a fucking people person? 8. This isn't an office. It's HELL with fluorescent lighting. 9. I started out with nothing still have most of it left. 10. I pretend to work, they pretend to pay me. 11. YOU!!... off my fucking planet!!! 12. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble pack is cheap. You choose. 13. Practice random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control. 14. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed. 15. And your cry-baby, whiny-assed opinion would be.....? 16. I'm not crazy. I've been

Things Are Geting Good
Well life is getting better Like, alot The last few days have been... Amazing To say the least The Gods must be smiling upon me My boyfriend He is so perfect An angel So kind Caring And loving He treats me so well Like a princess And I know I don't deserve him But I can't help but be addicted to his love And of course Return it 100% I love him more than anyone Or anything He is truley unbelievable Because of his love I've been comeing out of my depression I wrote my first love song the other day It's pretty lame But he likes it atleast.. I'm comeing into good fourtune A large amount of money just crossed my path I'm sure it comes without saying that I'm excited about it Ha ha Today I'm spending my first few dollars of it On a much needed hair cut I'm trying to think of what else I could blow some on I love to blow money But havent had any to blow in years So this will be fun Well the day I've hated most for years came and went And it was wonderful

Things About Me
Well here is a bit where I hang out .. and what I love to do. Places I love to be are http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/academy/ Its a place for Masters and Subs as well as a place to learn and explore submission. Anyone interested should try it out or contact me to find out more. Places I also go are School and work. Going to school to become an aviation Mechanic and then work at an ice cream and burger joint/grocery store Wanna know more get with me.

Things I've Learned
These are a few things I've learned over my life. I am writing them down here because I think they might be helpful to others. 1. Never tell a hermaphrodite to go fuck them self.......they can. 2. Always watch your head when going to place your little one in the car seat. The kids head is usually higher then yours is. My poor son, I think he only cried because he realised we were related. 3. When getting high don't over do it. After 6 joints you don't get any higher, just lower in your stash. 4. If all the guys at the black tie affair have the same exact tuxedo on.....they all dressed correctly. If two gals have the same dress on at it.......IT'S WAR 5. If you are over 30...don't use the trampoline you bought the kids. There come an age when one should never try to put one's ass over their head and bounce. 6. Dogs don't like trampoline's 7. Never fart around a blind skunk, it just makes them horney. 8. Having sex doggy style does not mean humping your wife's leg. 9

15 Things To Do While Your G/f Shops At Wallmart
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,"Code3" in housewares...and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?" 9. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously while loud

50 Things To Do During Finals
1. Bring a pillow. Fall asleep (or pretend to) until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say ``oh geez, better get cracking'' and do some gibberish work. 2. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming ``Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!'' 3. If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the surface integral symbol. 4. Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril. 5. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, ``I'm SOOO sure you can hear me thinking.'' Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is. 6. Bring cheerleaders. 7. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, ``I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's

30 Things Guys Should Know About Girls
30 THINGS GUYS SHOULD KNOW ABOUT GIRLS: written by a guy after many years of experience. 1.Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do. 2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be mud. 3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat. 4. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful. 5. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous. 6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it. 7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms. 8.If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did. 8.5

Thinking Out Loud
this is one of my FAVORITES of all my writings... I go back to my old profile, the one I can never get back into and read my old thoughts... I like this one, the most. Thinking out loud!! > Wake up every morning, my day begins > Wonder how boring it'd be, cant wait for it to end > This so called life I have, I can not stand > Wope! There goes my back again, I can not stand! > Slowly get'n up, what hell I got to go thru to start my day > Oh god help me up, every morning I got to pray > Time's a ticking I gots to get on my way > > Thinking 'bout time gone by, how far I have gone > Talking to myself in this early dawn > Hands on the steering wheel, as I yawn > An invisible line somehwhere in the dirt drawn > I cross it, not realize'n, I have already gone beyond > The point of no return, I travel the road of life > Narrow and sharp as the blade of a knife > > Every mistake I make is a cut to remind me > The pain I feel, a lesson learned,

Things To Think About.
Your alarm goes off, you hit the snooze and sleep for another 10 minutes. He stays up for days on end. You take a warm shower to help you wake up. He goes days or weeks without running water. You complain of a "headache", and call in sick. He gets shot at as others are hit, and keeps moving forward. You put on your anti war/don't support the troops shirt, and go meet up with your friends. He still fights for your right to wear that shirt. You make sure you're cell phone is in your pocket. He clutches the cross hanging on his chain next to his dog tags. You talk trash about your "buddies" that aren't with you. He knows he may not see some of his buddies again. You walk down the beach, staring at all the pretty girls. He walks the streets, searching for insurgents and terrorists. You complain about how hot it is. He wears his heavy gear, not daring to take off his helmet to wipe his brow. You go out to lunch, and complain because the restau

Things.
One wonders in every situation just exactly what you're getting yourself into, whether it be from time to time, day to day, minute to minute, second to second. Sometimes, it's best to keep these things contrite and simple. Yet, somehow not knowing what came before seems to be best, for ignorance is bliss, or so they say - it's what's at the moment as well as in the future that's important and relevant. However, pure ignorance of what came before could potentially lead to a disasturous future, if left unacknowledged. Awareness and acceptance, Along with a pinch of a spice called trust, inevitably are what leads toward something people call happy. ^_^

Thinking
Thinking. Can't stop thinking. Think of you. This. That. That Life. That day. That dream was mine. A utopian dream. Your aura; struck me like lightning to a tree. Pointy, like a star, you shone. So bright, yet not shining as a star would, But as apparent as white chalk on a blackboard. You would not show off like a star. Yet you did burn so hot, so fiercely, so explosively - you were a star in my eyes. But like all stars, you died. That gas was gone. No pull between us. The atmosphere was dry and I began to choke. I was taken from my star - like a child being taken from its poor, drunken mother - I did not know what was happening. Dazed. Confused. Without true reality, I there sat. Wondering. The end of my world had only just begun, with yours beginning.

Things People Don't Know About Me But Probably Should..
♠I'm very opinionated. ♠ I won't knowingly hurt anyone's feelings if the feelings can be spared. ♠ I love, love. It's the greatest feeling in the world. ♠ When I say 'I Love You' I mean it. Those words will never pass my lips without being very heart felt and true. ♠ I tend to push people away when I feel they're getting 'too close'. It's not that I don't Love and or value these people, it's a defense mechanism caused by being burned so many times in the past. The heart and soul can only take so much before it breaks permanently. This is what will happen if people let it. ♠ I am a very kind and affectionate person until pushed to be otherwise. ♠ I tend to over think things. I like to take details into consideration before making a final decision. ♠ I will give anyone anything I have if they just ask for it. ♠ And finally, underneath this tough exterior lays someone very soft and sensitive. I may not be th

Think Before You Speak
Think before you speak... Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great! Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did.... FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word... he knew better. SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been usin g. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls." THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store tha

-=[things Are Not Always Black Or White]=-
-=[Things Are Not Always Black or White]=- In life, a lesson learned in your past that you will never forget completely. When I was in elementary school, I got into a major argument with a boy in my class. I have forgotten what the argument was about, but I have never forgotten the lesson learned that day. I was convinced that I was right and he was wrong - and he was just as convinced that I was wrong and he was right. The teacher decided to teach us a very important lesson. She brought us up to the front of the class and placed him on one side of her desk and me on the other. In the middle of her desk was a large, round object. I could clearly see that it was black. She asked the boy what color the object was. White, he answered. I couldn’t believe he said the object was white, when it was obviously black! Another argument started between my classmate and me, this time about the color of the object. The teacher told me to go stand where the boy was standing an

10 Things I Hate About You Poem
I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick, it even makes me rhyme. I hate the way you are always right, I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when you are not around, and the fact that you didn't call. But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you, not even close not even a little bite not even at all.

Things You Learn - Or Should...
After a while..... You learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. Souls are not made to be chained, but hands are made to be held, and these are two things that are quite different. You learn love does not mean leaning on someone else's shoulder of companionship, does not mean security, and you understand that presents are not promises and kisses are not contracts. You learn love is something that you cannot describe until you are in it, and even then it's indescribable. You learn to accept your defeats with your head held high and your eyes wide open, learning from and embracing each and every one with the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child. You learn to build your life's roads on the rock of your wisdom today, because tomorrow's trails forged through sand will surely fail with such frail foundations, so easily erased by the winds of the world and sands of time. You learn to build your heart's home on a foundation of rock, becau

The Things That Pick My Ass
Tailgating.....is it really nessecary?.....I think the next person that tailgates me, I am just gonna pull moxy on the breaks and let the fucker smash into me.....I want a new vehicle anywayz. I can honestly say I dont tailgate. I will drive my van through a ditch, snow bank, barricade on the meridian or even side swip ya so i can pass....I might flash my lights and honk at the very least. LOL The warning labels on a pack of smokes were supposed to gross us out into not smoking....Fuck guys you should check out rotten.com if ya wanna see some gross ass pics. The people who run liquor stores should look like they live in it....Nasty ass crackwhore looking beasts! LOL Tube socks.....WTF!?!?!?! seriously people what the fuck is the point.....they are ugly and really cant be comfortable....and the purpose?....someone please tell me the reason for it. Why the hell do doctors tell people they are gonna die? Now that person is gonna basically kill themself worrying about the death

10 Things Dumbasses Do On Cherrytap
ONE there is NO SUCH THING as a CherryTap tracker. it does NOT exist. so quit posting stupid bulletins like "OH-MY-GOD this WORKS!!!" no, it doesnt. TWO To the people who have like 100,000 friends, are you serious? You're stupid. Go play in traffic. THREE Don't ever post pictures and say "OMG, I'm so ugly" "OMG, I'm so fat" because if you were, you wouldn't post them. And if u do ur a freaking mongoloid. FOUR Nobody cares about threats over the internet. Don't try to act hardcore with the keyboard. Fighting online is like racing in the special olympics; even if you win, you're still retarded. FIVE Quit crying b/c you're not on someones top 8. who cares? ITS CherryTap SIX Who really cares if I don't accept you as a friend? MOVE ON!!! Don't send me another request or message asking "what's up with you not adding me?" I don't want you as a friend, that's what's up frui

Things You Might Not Know
30 Things You Might Not Know!! by ktwalter73What are you listening to right now?: the hum of the air purifier, baby playingWhat was the last thing you ate?: hmm... veggie pizza at my friends' house!If you were a crayon what color would you be?: i've been told it's spank me pink, but i hate pink... spank me purple???How is the weather right now?: decent... about 60 FWhat color is your underwear right now?: i only wear underwear when i'm feeling sexy n kinkyWho was the last person you talked to on the phone?: jessica, calling about gaming nightThe first thing you notice about the opposite sex?: eyes, face. you need kind both for me to consider talking to youFavorite type of food?: ice creamDo you drink?: occassionally. i like a glass of wine before bed.Ever got so drunk you dont remember?: sure. but i grew out of that lolWhat color are your eyes?: brownSingle?: nopeFavorite month?: not sure... august is very very hot. i love hot weather. plus fall is my favorite season,

Things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do.
THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOUR CELL PHONE COULD DO. There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car. Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the

Thinking Of You
As the sunrises never forget how much I love As the sunsets never forget how much I love you As the moon shines bright in the sky above with the beautiful stars that surround the heavens .. Even when you’re not home I can still see your beautiful hazel green eyes, your soft curly black hair, your warm smile and you strong but sweet voice. I can hear your voice whispering in my ear saying, I love you Never forget how much I love you As the sunrises never forget how much I love As the sunsets never forget how much I love you As the moon shines bright in the sky above with the beautiful stars that surround the heavens Never forget how much I love you Your love lives inside me Your love goes wherever I go. I love you always and forever.

Things To Do At Wal-mart
This is one of my favorites. I know a few people who have done some of these...Tooo Funny _____________________________________________ Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the Rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares ..... And see what happens. 5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on layaway. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look righ

Things I Hate About Ct
I've noticed (in the few short days I've been here) some things that I reeeeeaaallllyyy hate about CT. Ok let's start with the girls who seem to think they need to put alluring words in their nicknames. News flash Cupcake, you look like your mommy and daddy dont feed you, eat a f'cking sandwich you bone then maybe you'll live up that porn star name you're sporting. And then there's the girls who, for some unknown reason feel the need to pose with their fat ugly boobs/ass pressed against the cam.......ok sorry I threw up in my mouth a little just thinking about it. I'm ok now. Your fat boobs and your fat ass are NOT pretty. Put some clothes on and try to show us some personality there Slim. What's on the inside is more important then what's on the outside but c'mon! You're scaring people away.....sorry threw up in my mouth again. =( Ok now seriously, GUYS. What on God's green Earth makes you think that anyone cares how talented your tongue is? Most of the ones who are spewing this VER

100 Things About Me
100 things about me 1. Full Name: Sarah-Jane Cowley 2. Nicknames: Saz,Sazzy,Ninja, shortie 3. Birthday: 4th may 1989 4. Place of Birth: Whitehaven hospital 5. Zodiac Sign: Taurus 6. Male or Female: Female 7. Level of Education: College - BTEC First Diploma in Business 8. College: Preston College 9. Occupation: Maccys 10. Residence: Preston 11. MSN Screen Name: Sazzy......Its been a month since my last nightout dancing the night away now me ready for a sesh.... __Your Appearance___ 12. Hair Color: blondy browny 13. Hair Length: just over shoulder length 14. Eye color: blue 15. Weight: 11stone 16. Height: 5ft 17. Braces?: No 18. Glasses?: yeeah (Just for pc) 19. Piercings: yeah ma belly button 20. Tattoos: yeah on m stomach chinease symbol maeaing love 21. Righty or Lefty: Lefty ___Your 'Firsts'___ 22. First best friend: Sophie i think cannit remember 23. First Award: Bronze medal in tap and modern dance 24. First Concert: steps haha 25. First pet: d

Thinking
all my life i have thought to myself ... what are you going to do next... what is going to come next in this life that is so randomly delt out to you ? i feel like i will never know what is exactly going to happen... and then the phone rings... someone tells you that you are going to have to do this ... wear this ... act like this... I was not ready for this kind of transaction in my life ... i wasnt ready to become so dead to the world around me. i think to myself sometime ... what if this happen ... what if that didnt happen, would i still be in the situation that i am in ? i think not .. by my personal belief.i feel like was delt my hand as becoming a failure before i even knew it. i was raised to be the way that i am like it or not i am and always will be.. just, me ... sometimes i want to sit and scream "I WANT OUT!" i want out of this ... life that im living so irresponceably. i want some one else to control it .. tell me what i am and am not to do maybe

Things I Did Today
Wife is out of town with a boyfriend this weekend, so I decided now that I'm gainfully employed again to do some cool stuff for myself. Went out to the car, and discovered someone had been messing with my gas cap. They'd opened the door, opened the cap, and closed the door with the cap still off. Several cars in the lots had their doors open. Time to call the HOA and bitch about security. Started the car, and the "engine warning" light came on. At this point, I'm ready to go back to bed, but I went down any way, and made the following purchases: 1. Avermedia tv capture card 2. 2 USB hubs 3. Logitech quickcam. The Avermedia is very very cool. You can be expecting lots of new pictures because of it. I just plugged it into the cable tv line, into the USB port, installed the software, and I now have 99 channels of basic cable. (alas, movie channels require a digital tuner, which I've yetto see in a computer card) USB hubs. One for me, one for the wifey. We've jus

Thinkin
ive been doing alot of thinking.. i know bad huh lol... just about life, family, guys, people, work.. shit a little of everything... family-i love my family to death. they are my life. if they werent around i dont know what id do.. work-im so ready for this vacation that is in 6 days.. maybe ill be able to clear my mind... who knows .. but i do know i am so so so ready... it will be good to get out of texas.. guys- im just confused as always when it comes to guys. i really dont know.. i do like a guy.. yeah.. im not gonna go into that right now .. people- dont know where to start here... people need to learn to mind their own business.. and dont talk about people if u dont know them at all.. come on people this is not high school anymore this is REAL life.. so GROW UP and GET A LIFE and STAY OUT OF MINE!!!!

Thinking
Signs of things that come too soon Face the reaper at high noon Destiny of all mortals due Lives that end to make all new Icy touch of deaths sweet hand Comes to all in times demand One moment is all we have to live Only now is the gift we have to give All too soon we depart our flesh Making way for others fresh Who have to learn the lessons we know Take their falls and in time grow Time moves on we turn to dust All is as it should be in this we trust By R. Thomas Dinsmore

15 Things You Probably Never Knew
15 Things You Probably Never Knew or Thought About > > > > > > > 1. At least 5 people in this world love you so much they would die for >you. > > > > > > > 2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way. > > > > > > > 3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is becaus e they want to >be just like you. > > > > > > > 4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't >like you. > > > > > > > 5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep. > > > > > > > 6. You mean the world to someone. > > > > > > > 7. If not for you, some one may not be living. > > > > > > > 8. You are special and unique. > > > > > > > 9. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. > > > > > > > > 10. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it. > > > > > > > 11. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take a look: you most likely tur

Think About It
What you speak and think about, you bring about! Your words, your dreams, and your thoughts have power to create conditions in your life. What you speak about, you can bring about. If you keep saying you can't stand your job, you might lose your job. If you keep saying you can't stand your body,your body can become sick. If you keep saying you can't stand your car, your car could be stolen or just stop operating. If you keep saying you're broke, guess what? You'll always be broke. If you keep saying you can't trust a man or trust a woman, you will always find someone in your life to hurt and betray you. If you keep saying you can't find a job, you will remain unemployed. If you keep saying you can't find someone to love you or believe in you, your very thought will attract more experiences to confirm your beliefs. If you keep talking about a divorce or break up in a relationship, then you might end up with it. Turn your thoughts and conversations around to be more po

Thinking
I walk alone on this path called life and I meet many. Following a road that I will only live. You came into my life, a fire with so much that I wanted to learn and how much I needed to love you. I cry to you of my desires that only you alone can fill. Walking this path you turn and take a different trail, one that I am afraid of, it is dark and cold. I worry for you, where are you now, I see your face as I did when we met yet there is a shadow with you dark and cruel. I call to you to return but all I see is the memory of who you were. I walk again slow and sure being carefree yet cautious of the eyes that watch from the woods. So clear and flowinging is the water ahead, There I will release the fear and guilt that I alone have carried, some of my own actions and that of others. I look around I see all whom I have loved and all that I have hurt. I walk to the edge of this water. I listen to the beauty that it provides and I sit by the waters edge and release the tears that I have

Think Before You Speak!!
Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great! Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did.... FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back My husband didn't say a word... he knew better. SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls" THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that

**30 Things Stressed Women May Say At Work**
**30 THINGS STRESSED WOMEN MAY SAY AT WORK** **1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you.** **2. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.** **3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.** **4. Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine?** **5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.** **6. Do I look like a people person?** **7. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.** **8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left ** **9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.** **10. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?** **11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years** **12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer** **13. Do they ever shut up on

Things That They Say, Things That We Know, Things That I'm Hoping Are Actually So
1.Good things come to those who wait..., but if you really want something bad enough you should go for it with all you have...2.things happen for a reason, but somethings may never happen unless you provide an opportunity /reason for it to..3.treat others as you would have them treat you..enough said..4.everyone has a soulmate...how and when you find that person I think depends on your timing and what you are willing to accept..5.Do all things really happen for a reason??.6.we are all just bunch of fish in a huge sea...soo, how do we find that soul mate again?..7..tell that person how you feel...ask the beauty queen at the prom to dance..go to the frkn dance, for starters..you may always regret not..8.have enough sense to know a good thing when you have found it.9.give me the strength to change the things I can, accept the things I cannot, and knowledge to know the difference..(er sumptin like that, always liked that one)..10.tell ur parents , family and loved ones that you love them,.

Thinking About Myself
I am coming to realize I don't know myself at all. The more I try to sort out who and what I am, the more I find the edges shifting and degrading. I do believe that for some women, being in control and strong and being able to do it all is important. The whole "female activist" attitude is a true calling to some. But, not to me. I am the old fashioned girl who wants to devote her love and soul to one man. Yes, I don't want to work, i want to love and support my family from home. I realize in looking back, that I have struggled with this mindset and therefore, have rebelled against simply doing so. Instead of simply freeing myself to my feelings and desires, I have fought them. Now that it's too late, I am coming to see this. I wonder in the dark of night, if things could be done again, would I be able to keep these walls torn down and simply - be me - or would I start to struggle again with general acceptance? would i be able to hold my head up for being honest to myself, or would I

Think First!
Body: Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large raging violent river. Needing to get on the other side, the first man prayed, "God, please give me the strength to cross the river." Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice. After witnessing that, the second man prayed, "God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river." Poof! God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs and he was able to row across in about an hour after almost capsizing once. Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed, "God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river. Poof! He was turned into a woman. She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards up stream and walked across the bridge.

Things You'd Love To Say Out-loud At Work
1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of sh*t. 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for you? 4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. 5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way. 6. Who lit the fuse on your tampon? 7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message. 8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant. 9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying. 10. Ahhhh. I see the f*ck-up fairy has visited us again. 11. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid. 12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. 13. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a sh*t. 14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth. 15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you. 16.

Things To Ponder
*If life is a gift, does that make God an Indian giver? *Why do we call it taking a piss or taking a shit? Seriously, just where are we taking it? Are we taking it to your leader? Should we wrap it with pretty pink bows? If anything aren't we giving a shit? I made it, now I give it to the world. But if that were the case, and someone says "I don't give a shit," are they admitting constipation? *Speaking of shit, why is it you can drop a shit the size of Chile and you barely need a single square of toilet paper to get yourself entirely squeaky clean, but heaven forbid it's that one pinky sized turd--half a roll later and you finally just give up and give in to the fact you're gonna have treadmarks. *Why is it that Rhode Islanders only seem to use blinkers when it's the wrong one? *You're on the highway. You're at a merge. You go, I go, you go, I go. WORK ON THIS. *Does anyone else remember back in the day (think grade school) when blowing someone was more commonly re

Things
Well i Had to come to my sisters house to get my neice and nephew on the bus. Because my brother inlaws mother got rused to the hospital this morning and she lives in indiana and he went up there... my sister had to work.. My neice asked me why does it seem like everything bad happens to our family... I wasnt quite sure how to go about answering this question so i told her that bad things happen to all families and she replies with but bad things seem to always happen to our family... I was baffled i didnt know what to say... i just simply told her that it was because we have a big family... Its really amazing how much kids realize what is going on probably more so than adults... I really dont understand what the plan is for my life or my family and i dont know that i ever will... but as she said it seems bad things always happen to us... Things on my end have not been bad recently though very good to be exact... and i have amazing friends and family to thank and a g

80 Things You Might Not Know About Me
80 Things You Might Not Know About Me Whats your middle name?Yeah right How big is your bed?Queen What are you listening to right now?Nothing What are the last 4 digits in your cellphone number?3155 What was the last thing you ate?Licorice Last person you hugged?My nephew How is the weather right now?Nice Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?Adam What is the first thing u notice in the opposite sex?Eyes Favorite type of Food.Chinese Do you want children?Yes Do you drink?Occsionally Ever get so drunk you don\'t remember the entire night?Not the whole night no..most yes Hair color?Dark Brown Eye colour?Hazel Do you wear contacts/glasses?No but I need to Favorite holiday?Thanksgiving Favorite Season?Summer Have you ever cried over a girl/boy?

Things To Ponder
1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. 2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.... 3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? 5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. 6. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. 7. What if there were no hypothetical questions? 8. If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? 9. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? 10. Is there another word for synonym? 11. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?" 12. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant? 13. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? 14. Would a fly

Think About This
Got this from a friends blog on 360 , very well put I thought, just wanted to share. Think about this for a while.... If I happened to show up on your door step crying, would you care?..... If I called you and asked you to pick me up because something happened, would you come?..... If I had one day left to live my life, would you be part of that last day?.... If I needed a shoulder to cry on, would you give me yours?.... This is a test to see who your real friends are, or if you are just someone to talk to when they're bored....

16 Things That Took Me Over 50 Years To Learn
16 THINGS THAT TOOK ME OVER 50 YEARS TO LEARN By Dave Barry 1.Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. 2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be "meetings." 3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness." 4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them. 5. You should not confuse your career with your life. 6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. 7. Never lick a steak knife. 8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip. 9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time. 10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her

Things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do.
THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOUR CELL PHONE COULD DO There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency -- The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the perso

Things Still Going Bad
I am controlling myself a bit better now. But I'm still emotional and all over the place. I still haven't gone to school and I don't want to go tomorrow, but I think I have to. I don't want to be doing to much byback at the end of the year. Nothing is really helping my mood these days. I mean nothing. Cigarettes, Liqour, the roof, food, no food, talking, or music. I'm not resorting to medication. I refuse. But thats just me. Someone said I could be bipolar, but I refuse to believe that shit either. What is getting me even more upset is that I had been good for so long. Like better than ever good. It gets as good as it can and then crash I guess.

Thinking Of You...
You came to my door with a dozen red roses in a vase, and a white silk blindfold in the other. I take the flowers and place them on the table; you came up from behind give me, and placed a gentle kiss on the neck, and place the blindfold over my eyes. Then you lead me out to the car. I'm both scared and excited. We drive neither saying a word . Finally, you stop the car and get out, open my door and the smell of wild flowers is the first thing I notice. The next thing I sense is the silence, the only sound is the babble from a near by brook. You lead me to an awaiting a picnic basket, and a spread out blanket. There you seat me and open the basket , it has fruits of all kinds and a bottle of white wine. You feed me the fruit and we drink some of the wine, you tease me with different foods from the basket. Touching my tongue, some rolling over my body, and some squeezing juices out on me . After your finish you reach out and kiss me softly on the cheek, and follow my neck down to my sho

Things I Never Say
Another day without you has gone. I miss you dearly…where did we go wrong? When will this pain end, When will my heartache for you mend? I cant stop thinking of the way things use to be. When you cared and loved only me. Although we’re thousand miles apart You will always be in my heart. You will always be the man in my life! I dream of the day we marry and I become your loving wife. [october 06]

Things Ur Cell Can Do
WOW! This stuff really worked. very useful info if you ever need it one day...... THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOUR CELL PHONE COULD DO There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency -- The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from you

11 Things To Never Say To A Cop
1. Are you Andy or Barney? 2. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does. 3. I thought you had to be in good physical condition to be a police officer. 4. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in. 5. I pay your salary! 6. Aren't you the guy from the Village People? 7. Hey, you must've been doing' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job! 8. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you? 9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too! 10. I was trying to keep up with traffic. I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are. 11. When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

Things I Hate Abput People
you know i really hate when people that you know very well think when they lie to you, you dont already know theyre lying and when you see them they expect you not to be mad and then when you are mad theyre mad at you cause.. who would have thought it.. they were caught.. i hate fucking liars.. i dont know where my life is going.. and i dont know what to do about it.. break my heart and try not to give a shit or keep it splintering lose it a littl emore everyday and enjoy the good times that come few and further between now days??? I hate the way people jsut assume you'll never figure out the lies and when you finally do think to ask about something cause you never thought it was a threat and you find out it was they still try to lie and act mad like you should trust them when all theyve done is flush your trust down the shitter.. well i think im done trusting FCK everyone Fuck the haters the friends the aquaintenes i give up i will not trust anyone but myself from now on.. n for the p

~ Things To Think About ~
Number 10 Life is sexually transmitted. Number 9 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him Without an erection, make him a sandwich. Number 7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a Person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. Number 6 Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for Anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. Number 5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. Number 4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. Number 3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars And a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents? Number 2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now The world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. AND THE NUM

21 Things I Want In A Lover
I've been reading all these bulletins about "I WANT THIS GUY/GIRL" lately. Well, I've been with that girl and i've had that guy. Obviously it didn't work. That being the case, I've decided to post what I want. Flowers aren't in my top 10. :) Anyone who I end up with should: 1. Understand that I have kids. That means you will NEVER come first. Can't handle 2nd place? Leave. 2. Be HONEST..with me and yourself. 3. Be FAITHFUL. 4. Be drug/disease/mental illness free. These ARE deal breakers. 5. Have a sense of humor. 6. Know how to do laundry. 7. Be able to find joy in the world around them. 8. Have a job (i'm not supporting your ass and i don't want u to support me.) 9. Understand that i'm not your ex or your mother. I don't care if i have something in common with them. I'm NOT them and that should be enough. 10. Know when to be serious and when to be silly. 11. Leave me alone when i'm pissed. 12. Know that if i was pissed @ u, i'd tell you. 13.

15 Things
"15 Things I've Done That You Might Not Have" 1. Had sex in the Ripley's Believe it or Not museum in New Orleans during Mardi Gras. 2. Been taken to said Mardi Gras for my 21st birthday, and shared a bottle of '69 Dom Perignon. 3. Gone whale watching in Maui. 4. Created a drink that only a certain few bartenders now how to make. 5. Played Janet in the floor show for Rocky Horror. Including at the 8th St. Playhouse. 6. Touched a wild killer whale while scuba diving. 7. Bungee jumped. 8. Posed for Easy Rider. 9. Smoked a joint with Eric Clapton. 10. Seen The Ramones live. 10 times. 8 of those with the original line up. 11. Gotten tipped $500 by Frank Sinatra 'cuz he liked my martinis. 12. Turned down a date with the bass player of Warrant. Just wasn't into him or hair bands for that matter. Don't even remember his name. 13. Run the light board for a ton of bands, including a relatively unknown Morbid Angel. Lemme tell you, it's not a lot of work ru

Things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do
THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOUR CELL PHONE COULD DO There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency -- The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the perso

60 Things Guys Don't Want Girls 2 Know
-Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 5 guys..you're a HOE) --"Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone. --Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about. --Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes. --Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. --Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him. --Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the let-her-complain-to-you-an d-then-have-her-rea lize-how-wonderful-and-nic e-you-are method. --A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to. --Boyfriends need to be reassured often that th

25 Things To Know Youve Grown Up
1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. >> > 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. >> > 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. >> > 4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed. >> > 5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator. >> > 6. You watch the Weather Channel. >> > 7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and >>"breakup." >> > 8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14. >> > 9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up." >> > 10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids >>next door won't turn down the stereo. >> > 11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around >>you. >> > 12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. >> > 13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up. >> > 14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's >>leftovers. >> > 15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. >> > 16. You take naps. >>

Think About It
Enjoy! The work of Steven Wright, he's the famously erudite scientist and comic who once said: "I woke up one morning and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates." His mind sees things differently than most of us do. To our amazement and amusement, here are some of his gems: 1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. 2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- They don't expect it back. 3 - Half the people you know are below average. 4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. 5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot. 6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good. 7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. 8 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain. 9 - All those who believe in psycho-kinesis, raise my hand. 10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. 11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend.....but she left me be

10 Things She'd Like To Accomplish Before I Die
10 things I would like to accomplish before I die.So here I go: 1. Be completely debt-free. I want to have no mortgage, no car payment, no credit card balances, nothing. It just might take me croaking and my life insurance to accomplish this. 2. A vacation in Las Vegas 3. See all of my children married and happy. 4. Get back to 135 lbs..I'll settle for 140lbs It's not a vanity thing, it's a health thing. That's where I seem to feel the best. 5. Enjoy the empty nest.......my youngest is 10, so that should be in the next 8 years...... 6. Drive a 1969 Dodge Charger "General Lee" that would be wicked awesome, but just drive it.....fast.......I'd be happy. 7. Would like to see grandchildren 8. Own my dream house in the country, complete with pool, hot tub, and game room. 9. Do whatever I want, whenever I want, for one whole week. This includes sleeping late, staying up late, eating whatever whenever, you name it..... 10. Travel......Wo

Things Are Not Always Black Or White
In life, a lesson learned in your past that you will never forget completely. When I was in elementary school, I got into a major argument with a boy in my class. I have forgotten what the argument was about, but I have never forgotten the lesson learned that day. I was convinced that I was right and he was wrong - and he was just as convinced that I was wrong and he was right. The teacher decided to teach us a very important lesson. She brought us up to the front of the class and placed him on one side of her desk and me on the other. In the middle of her desk was a large, round object. I could clearly see that it was black. She asked the boy what color the object was. White, he answered. I couldn’t believe he said the object was white, when it was obviously black! Another argument started between my classmate and me, this time about the color of the object. The teacher told me to go stand where the boy was standing and told him to come stand where I had been. We ch

Things I Just Don't Get...
There's things that confuse me, and other things that piss me off. A few trends really do both. 1. Why do people save you as a friend, but never talk? It's like that on myspace... like they add you to boost their friend count. I usually get the impression that people with ridiculously high friend counts dont have much conversation, though I could be wrong... since it's more or less a popularity contest. High School 2.0 I suppose. 2. Sassy girls. A lil spunk is cool, and so is an independent attitude. But sassiness sometimes goes beyond cute into that domain called chicken-headedness and shallowness. Seriously, women I work with tote it like it's what men want, but then get dumb in the face and upset when men play with their emotions or pass them for someone else. Well... men won't normally take someone seriously unless they're genuinely themselves. The "sassy sista" routine is just as bad as guys using the "pretty boy" or "bad boy" routine, each one is cookie cutter

Things That Suck!!
Hi all my friends this is about Things That Suck. number 1. myspace, why because way to many young girls and boys online with profiles that parents dont know about and way to many perves looking for some 1 to get a hold of thats not right at all. number 2. cheaters, as in men and women im not saying all do it but there are some out there that do and it makes it hard to find true love and also trust of course we all want some 1 to love and care for but it makes it hard to love and trust when soo many are messin around. number 3, children, its hard to think that kids can be treated soo bad in school from school mates and even some teachers and also even principles at times when. I went to school wich was many many moons now of course sence im 35 times was tough but not like now these days it seems like its all about money and grades sometimes they even pass students before any 1 else thats not right either school should not be competion it use to be about fun and learning now se

Things That Make You Go Hmmm.
As days that go by, I wounder at all the possibilities of what is realy going on in the world. But mainly in my own family. Is spending time somewhere else more inportant than gtting to know a family member, in which a person hasn't seen in that other person's life time? Or drinking away a life just so that person can be with another person who is no longer on the planet? Or is that person reborn and living somewhere else? Is it selfish for a person to keep another person away from their family all because they can't let go? Sometimes I wounder about these things but will they ever get answerd? Why do some people have it easy for them and others work hard just so they can live? Why do people dream about things that might happen or will they never come true? Who do people go off to war only to fight for something that is long forgotten? What is normal when to each person normal is different? Why do doctors diagnos people crazy when they them self might be the crazy one and the perso

10 Things About Being Wiccan
I also found this 10 Things About Being Wiccan 1) No conversation or recruitment is necessary... Wiccans have no insecure compulsion to convert everyone to their way of thinking. People come to Wicca when and if they are ready/interested. Furthermore, you are not required to accept or do anything that you're not comfortable with. 2) No artificial code of morality... Out of all of the creatures of this Earth, only humans are forced to live under unnatural moral codes. Wiccans believe simply: "An It Harm None, Do As Ye Will". 3) Progressive Reincarnation... Wiccans believe we are here to learn and to progress, not suffer eternal damnation if we 'slip-up' in someone else's eyes. 4) No Discrimination... There is no such thing as being the 'right' race, color, gender, sexual orientation, national or ethnic origin to be Wiccan; ALL are welcome! 5) No middle man (or woman)... Once you know all of the basics, you can be your own 'minister' or 'priest' you need never bow

Things I've Learned
As I close in on 40, I thought I'd share some of the knowledge and wisdom I've gained over the years: 1. There are very few problem that a bottle of Jack Daniels or Patron Silver tequila can't solve. 2. Being a complete fucking wiseass has not really held me back. If anything, it's thrown people off their game and allowed me to "sneak past" them. 3. It's not plagarism if you give credit to the original author. 4. Watching NASCAR is like watching a golf game....I'd rather watch flies fuck. 5. I have not matured with age.....I've aged with maturity. 6. Legos are still fun. 7. As my son goes into his 8th year and acts more and more like me at that age, I understand why my mother went prematurely gray. 8. With great responsibility...comes great bills. I had more "disposable income" when I was 15.... 9. Las Vegas has routinely become a place where I deposit my money...it's like a bank...with only a slightly worse interest rate.

Things I Learned
Please continue scrolling down -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I like you because of who you are to me.A true friend. And if I don't get this back I'll take the hint Tonight at midnight your true love will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at 1:00-4:00 PM tomorrow. It could be anywhere -- AOL, Yahoo, outside of school, anywhere. Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. Please send to 5 people in 5 minutes. Remember: "A good friend will come bail you out of jail.... But a true friend will be sitting next to you saying ... WE screwed up, but we had fun! " Proud to be your Friend! Make sure you read all the way down to the last sentence, and don't skip ahead. I've learned..that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes

12 Things Never Say To A Cop
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas) 2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in. 3.Aren't you the guy from the Village People? 4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me Good job! 5. Are You Andy or Barney? 6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer. 7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you? 8. I pay your salary! 9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too! 10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does. 11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around.. That's how far ahead of me they are. 12. When the Officer says "Gee ....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"

Things That You Should Never Say To A Woman During An Argument:
Things that you should never say to a woman during an argument: 10- Don't you have some laundry to do or something? 9- Aww, you are so cute when you get all ticked off. 8- You're just upset because your a** is beginning to spread. 7- Wait a minute -- I get it. What time of the month is it? 6- You're sure you don't want to consult the great Oprah on this one? 5- Sorry, I was just picturing you nekked. 4- Whoa, time out. Football is on. 3- Looks like someone had an extra bowl of bitch flakes this morning! 2- Is there any way we can do this via e-mail? 1- Who are you kidding? We both know that thing ain't loaded.

31 Things Guys Need To Know About Girls
31 things guys should know about girls!!! 1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do. 2. Don't cheat on them. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be mud. 3. Beware of every single male relatives and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your butt at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat. 4. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful. 5. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous. 6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it. 7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms. 8. If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did. --8.5. If you DO sleep with them, don't tell your friends that you did. 9

Think I'm Gonna Give It Another Try
Yes, I think I'm going to give my relationship another try. Its been hell or high water and we've survived both. Those outside our world don't understand and those close to us think we're crazy and that one of us will end up dead. So be it! Life is too damn short to live to make everyone else happy. I've got to worry about me once in a while after putting my kids first. So, here goes nothing!!! I love those who have helped and stood by me along the way and hope that this decision doesn't make them turn their backs on me but I will be understanding if that's what they decide. For those people who have turned their backs, I'm sorry you feel that way. True friends stay by your side through thick and thin. If you decide to turn your back, guess we were only their for a season or a reason. Either way, I love you like a friend should and hope that you understand. Anyway, I am off to eat my supper finally and get the youngin's to bed. I hope y'all have a good night and safe keeping! Love,

Think Before You Speak.......
Thanks for this bulletin! Made me Lmfao! Think before you speak... Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great! Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did.... FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back My husband didn't say a word... he knew better. SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with mens balls" THIRD TESTIMONY:

Think Before You Speak, In Other Words, Open Mouth, Insert Foot
Think before you speak... Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great! Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back... or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did.... FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back My husband didn't say a word... he knew better. SECOND TESTIMONY: I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with mens balls" THIRD TESTIMONY: My sister and I were at the mall and passed

Things I Have Learned And Have Often Forgotten (by My Own Personal Experience And By Watching Others Around Me).
Things I Have Learned and Have Often Forgotten (by my own personal experience and by watching others around me). Feel free to agree or disagree, I just thought I'd share some of my views. I'm always up to learning something new even if it counterdicts what I think I already know. An ignorant person thinks he/she knows it all, a truely wise individual knows he/she has much yet to learn. I always would rather chose to be wise, so my mind is always open. I thought this would be an interesting learning experience! And remember if you want someone to respect your point of view, you must first respect theirs! I truly believe in "agreeing to disagree". About Friends: 1. True friends are hard to come by, when you find them never let them go. 2. If your friend likes talking "smack" about others' (especially his/her other friends) behind their backs, it's a guarantee they are talking smack about you behind your back as well. You don't need a gossip for a friend!

Things Have Changed
I've read over my other blogs and I have to tell you that things have changed. Josh and I have worked out our problems and sure there are still problems to be worked out. I know that every couple has problems to work out and maybe ours are a little bigger than most but I know we will get through them. I'm pregnant again and it's a great feeling. Sure I still have the thought of what if I lose this baby but things are different this time around. I've already had to go to the doctor's office twice and we go again on the 21st. That should include an ultrasound. I will be getting all the paper work that day too so we will have it when we move to S.C.. I told Josh today when he came home for lunch that we only have 30 weeks left and I think that was a shock for him. We went last night to see 300, it's a great movie but if you don't like blood and gore then don't see it. On the way out we saw his friend, Peter, and they talked for a little while. We didn't get home until around 10 an

10 Things Losers Do On Cherry Tap
Ten Things Losers Do On Cherrytap....... ***ONE To the people who have like 25,000 friends, are you serious? You're stupid. Go play in traffic. ***TWO Don't ever post pictures and say "OMG, I'm so ugly" "OMG, I'm so fat" because if you were, you wouldn't post them. And if u do ur a freaking mongoloid. ***THREE Nobody cares about threats over the internet. Don't try to act hardcore with the keyboard. Fighting online is like racing in the special olympics; even if you win, you're still retarded. ***FOUR Quit crying b/c you didn't win a contest. who cares? ITS CHERRYTAP!!! ***FIVE people who have whoring contests*such as creamy coochie,biggest breasts* or whatever other nasty and degrading contests your little brain can conjure up.. *to the guys that do these* go find a girlfriend and fuck her b/c apparently you need something to occupy ur time! *the girls that have them and are entered in them* ur j

31 Things Guys Should Know About Women.
So, I got bored. And I was surfing around myspace. And I found this. Hope you learn from this, I did. The hard way. 31 THINGS GUYS SHOULD KNOW ABOUT GIRLS. Written by a guy. After years of experience. 1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do. 2. Don't cheat on them. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be mud. 3. Beware of every single male relatives and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your butt at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat. 4. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful. 5. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous. 6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it. 7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in y

Things That Make You Wonder About Our Cherrytap
ok this will be my CHERRY QUESTIONS section. I come across things on here I just don't get. This one is about the new FLUFFY picture on the homepage Now why is it ok for them to use a picture of a gun to the head of a cat but it's not ok to have guns in your own pictures. How is that picture not an NSFW picture but a picture of an ass in jeans fully clothed marked an NSFW....... Things that make you wonder about the our cherrytap........

Things I'll Never Say ...
"Things I'll Never Say" I’m tugging at my hair I’m pulling at my clothes I’m trying to keep my cool I know it shows I’m staring at my feet My checks are turning red I’m searching for the words inside my head [pre-Chorus] (Cause) I’m feeling nervous Trying to be so perfect Cause I know you’re worth it You’re worth it Yeah [Chorus] If I could say what I want to say I'd say I wanna blow you... away Be with you every night Am I squeezing you too tight If I could say what I want to see I want to see you go down On one knee Marry me today Yes, I’m wishing my life away With these things I’ll never say It don’t do me any good It’s just a waste of time What use is it to you What’s on my mind If ain’t coming out We’re not going anywhere So why can’t I just tell you that I care

5 Things That Really Piss Me Off...(re-post Of A Blog I Written On A Different Site Just After Christmas)
Ok with Christmas behind us it's time for me to stop being so damn chipper and go back to my usual "pissed off at the world" self. The best way I know to do this is to make a list of 5 things that piss me off. Here you go. Hope you enjoy. 1. Myspace: You have no idea how pissed I am that I'm addicted to this page. I always thought it was just an online popularity contest to see who can get the most friends. And for the most part it is. But now I'm addicted. Somewhere in between the get-to-know me surveys which ask "When did you last tell someone you thought about liking them" and "how many toes are on your best friends left foot" or whatever they ask I have got to know a lot of really cool people on here. And now I find myself racing home each night to see if I got any messages that day. So it's a mixed blessing. I'm thankful I got to know some great people on here but damn! Why did I have to get addicted! 2. Taxis: Ok I ride one to work once in a while and so

5 Things That Make Me Go Wtf?!
You know, there are some things out in this totally f'ed up world that I just can't figure out. Does anyone else have these moments where you just have to think "WTF?!" to yourselves? These are my top 5 WTF's... 1. Directions on shampoo bottles- Now I'm guessing everyone that reads this knows how to use a fucking bottle of shampoo but the companies still think they should make sure we know to "wet hair, lather, rinse, repeat" on their bottles. It's sad to think about it but they're probably some dumbass in Bfe Utah standing in his shower, toes all wrinkly, staring at the back of a bottle of White Rain thinking "Damn! I was suposed to rinse, THEN repeat! Thats how I get the soap out!!! ahaa!" 2. The little packs of sillica gel that is found in a new pair of shoes that says "Do Not Eat"- Wtf?! Ok, I admit that I am a rather large man and I like to eat a lot of wierd things. But I have NEVER dug something out of my shoe (new or used) and thought "Man! that looks mighty tasty!"

20 Things You Didn't Know About Bees
20 Things You Didn't Know About... Bees Undertaker bees, the queens who were called kings, how honey helps wounds... by Liza Lentini 1 There are 16,000 species. Most are solitary insects; only about 5 percent are social bees, the most common being the honeybee. As many as 80,000 of them colonize a single hive. 2 Drones—the male honeybees—live only for mating with the queen. If there is a shortage of food in the hive, the workers kick their lazy, gigolo asses out. 3 To die for: When drones mate, they die afterwards from a ruptured abdomen. Sex detaches their endophallus, which gets stuck inside the queen. 4 She continues to mate—the drones aren’t terribly smart, apparently—until she collects more than 70 million sperm from multiple males. 5 The queen was known as the king until the late 1660s, when Dutch scientist Jan Swammerdam dissected the hive’s big bee and discovered ovaries. 6 Someone call Homeland Security! Australian researchers discovered that

31 Things Guys Should Know About Girls!!!
31 things guys should know about girls!!! 1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do. 2. Don't cheat on them. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be mud. 3. Beware of every single male relatives and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your butt at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat. 4. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful. 5. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous. 6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it. 7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms. 8. If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did. --8.5. If you DO sleep with them, don't tell your friends that you did. 9

60 Things Not To Say To A Naked Guy
60 Things Not to Say to a Naked Guy 1. I've smoked fatter joints than that. 2. Ahh, it's cute. 3. Who circumcised you? 4. Why don't we just cuddle? 5. You know they have surgery to fix that. 6. It's more fun to look at. 7. Make it dance. 8. You know, there's a tower in Italy like that. 9. Can I paint a smiley face on that? 10. It looks like a night crawler. 11. Wow, and your feet are so big. 12. My last boyfriend was 4'' bigger. 13. It's ok, we'll work around it. 14. Is this a mild or a spicy Slim Jim? 15. Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh. 16. Will it squeak if I squeeze it? 17. Oh no, a flash headache. 18. (giggle and point) 19. Can I be honest with you? 20. My 8-year-old brother has one like that. 21. Let me go get my tweezers. 22. How sweet, you brought incense. 23. This explains your car. 24. You must be a growing boy. 25. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow. 26. Thanks, I needed a toothpick. 27. Are you one of those pygmi

Things Im Grateful For
the things im thankful for and keep me going everyday.. tho the list changes a little daily and thankfuly grows everyday. i wanted to share a little with all of you my friends... it may seem cheesey but so far its helping me deal with the day to day and things that have happend in my past...so here it goes the things that i am grateful for: All of my friend even tho i dont talk to them all the time when we do its a ton of fun For everyone that has been in and gone out of my life and teaching me new things For being able to start a bussiness and it going well in the first year For my wonderful boyfriend John(soon to be hubby) For being able to help others For other being willing to help me out For making enouph money to pay my bills and enouph to still have fun For being beautiful inside and out For being able to let my past go theres more but i dont know how many people are really going to read the whole thing but if you want to more of what im grateful fo

16 Things To Do At Wal-mart
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Put a bra and tampons in a guys shopping cart. Put a pair of tiny thongs in a big woman's buggy. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares".... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?" 9. Look right into the security camera; & use it as a mirror and pick your nose 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are. 11. Dart around th

Things Kids Say
Earlier tonight I was in the drive thru at McDonalds, my youngest daughter popped up as I was talking to my oldest daughter about what kind of Dr her friend wanted to be. She said he wanted to be a General Practioner. My youngest daughter then yelled "Shawnee wants to be a Peteratrician!", meaning pediatrician. I was literally crying I was laughing so hard and the girl in the drive thru was asking my oldest if I was nuts. You gotta love the things kids say

21 Things To Live By
ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully. TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other. THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want. FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it. FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye. SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married. SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight. EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much. NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely. TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling. ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives. TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly. THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?" FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievemen

60 Things Girls Dont Know About Guys
*Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. We rarely use beautiful. If a guy uses that, he likes you a whole hell of a lot. *"Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone. *Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about. *Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes. *Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. *Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him. *Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-are method. *A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to. *Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they're still loved. *Don't talk

60 Things That Girls Dont Know About Guys!
*Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. We rarely use beautiful. If a guy uses that, he likes you a whole hell of a lot. *"Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone. *Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about. *Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes. *Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. *Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him. *Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-are method. *A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to. *Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they're still loved. *Don't talk

60 Things~that Are Happening While You Read This...
60 Things That Are Happening~While you Read This........ 1. Somebody is very Proud of You.. 2. Somebody is Thinking of You.. 3. Somebody is caring about You.. 4. Somebody Misses You! 5. Somebody wants to talk to You.. 6. Somebody wants to be with You.. 7. Somebody hopes you aren't in trouble. 8. Somebody is Thankful for the support You have provided.. 9. Somebody wants to hold Your Hand.. 10. Somebody hopes everything turns out all right.. 11. Somebody wants You to be Happy.. 12. Somebody wants you to find her/him... 13. Somebody is celebrating your successes.. 14. Somebody wants to give You a gift.. 15. Somebody thinks that YOU are a gift! 16. Somebody hopes that You're not to cold, or too hot... 17. Somebody wants to Hug You! 18. Somebody Loves You.. 19. Somebody admires your strength.. 20. Somebody is thinking of You and Smiling! 21. Somebody wants to be your shoulder to cry on... 22. Somebody wants to go out with

Things Are Geting Better
ok if you read my last blog then you know that Josh my ex has my son and wont give him back. ok the last blog didnt get into anything cuz i was FREAKED out and up set so for anyone who cares heres the whole story. Last Sunday i took my sun to ft wayne to see his dad for 2 weeks.Monday i had a bad feeling all day just something was going to happen but i couldnt think of what.Well at around 2 it happened.My sons dad called me screaming saying that our son was sick.Ok kids get sick.then he tells me that i am a bad mother our son cant read im never going to see him again ever and that he is going to beat my brains in.I tell him that im on my way to get my son and if he wants to hurt me hes gonna have to go thru dave.He tells me not to come to ft wany i hang up.I call Dave crying and freakin.he says lets go to ft wayne.i get Dave and the whole time im trying to get ahold of Josh to find out what the fuck is going on i call his aunt.she gets ahold of him and he tells her the same shit.Bi

Things I Learned About Boys Over The Last Few Years
Things I've learned about boys over the last few years. NO boy is worth shaving your legs over. NO boy will miss you as much as you miss them even when they say they do. NO boy will love you the way that you want to be loved when you want to be loved. No boy understand emotions, so being emotional is pointless. NO boy will be there when you need them and even when they are, are they really there? NO boy understands your male friendships and they definetly don't understand female friendships. NO boy cares about the cute clothes you buy they just want to see you out of them anyway. NO boy thinks that sleep is important unless it's them. Am I saying that all boys are the same, probaly not but I haven't met one yet that isn't like this. Just some food for thought thats all.

Thinking
Do you remember the time So lost in your command I sharply squeezed my thighs together And nearly broke my hand? Do you remember the catch in my breath As you whispered into my ear? Do you remember at all How well I served you Master, dear? Do you remember the laughter That helped to sooth the pain? If we could do it over again, Would you do it over again? Do you remember the passion, The agony in my tears? Do you remember at all How well I served you Master, dear. Do you remember the ecstasy Of the pleasures that we shared?

Things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do.
There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a lifesaver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the person at your home press the unlock button, holdi

50 Things Girls Wished Guys Knew!
1. dont tell us when you think other girls are hot 2. whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 3. if you dont act like soap-opera guys, dont expect us to dress like Victoria Secret models. 4. mark anniversaries on a calendar. 5. don't ever tempt us to break up with you...we'll do it, I promise 6. we think about you all the time. 7. this is how we see it . . . Don't call = Don't Care. 8. pay attention. remember even the little things we tell you. 9. we like you to be a little jealous . . .but overly possessive is not necessary. 10. being able to make us laugh is so much more important than how much you can bench-press. 11. return favors 12.NEVER let us walk away. we walk, you follow. 13.we're allowed to be late . . . you are not. 14. eye contact is key. 15. dont take longer to get ready than we do. 16. laugh at our jokes. 17. three words . . . honesty, honesty, honesty. 18. girls can be groupies. guy groupies are stalke

Things Im Sure You Were Dying To Know About Me.
1-I'm one of the nicest people you will ever meet until you piss me off, then im a total cunt. 2-My husband never calls me by my name unless hes mad at me (otherwise he calls me little girl,super, or soup) 3-I'm scared of the dark 4-I wont sleep in my room alone, when my husband leaves for work in the morning I sleep on the couch. 5-I secretly like being tickled. 6-Ive laughed so hard that I pissed my pants on more than one occasion 7-My mother is my best friend and the stongest person ive ever known. 8-I LOVE bubble baths 9-I call my friends when I poop 10-I swallow my gum 11-Ive been told by numerous people that I am random as hell. 12-I have horrible mood swings. 13-I hate cleaning, I blame it on my mother and the chore list growing up. 14-My favorite band is Tool 15-I have a crush on Michael Stipe 16-Playing Sonic the Hedgehog pisses me off 17-I have a rainbow shark named Hitler and a snail named Herbert 18-Serial killers facinat

Things You'd Love To Say (but Don't Dare)
- Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again... - I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid. - You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. - I have plenty of talent and vision, I just don't give a darn. - Visualizing? I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth. - I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you being competent. - Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. - The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist. - Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

Things To Ponder In The Year 2007:
Things to ponder in the year 2007: Number 10 - Life is sexually transmitted. Number 9 - Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. Number 8 - Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. Number 7 - Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. Number 6 - Some people are like a slinky ... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. Number 5 - Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. Number 4 - All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. Number 3 - Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut saves you 30 cents? Number 2 - In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

Thinking Hurts
Have you ever been pushed so far that a line is drawn in your head. Your silently ticking away thinking of ways to ease the pain inside. While the person hurting you is consistantly unaware despire the looks of distain. You're anger burns and you weep with the feel of the weight of it all. The only answer is distance, and the reasons seem to leave more questions. Good intentions are my golden pavement to the hell I made for myself. Maybe it's best sometimes to let it go. Then reality rears, to be a good person or to let it happen. I choose to be good. It back fires, like always. I failed a friendship and myself. The reasons for it blurred in nothingness of spun lies. So many questions press on my head and I am left crying again. Then reality, things shift and others meet of the same mind. Logic, I forgot her and she is my friend. Lies are made clear. You're anger is a lie, its a cover for the fact that you're lying to yourself. I have my own back, and when you were not looking i

Thinking
Why is it when things go up it always comes back down. last night i hurt someone that is the greatest person on this earth and yes i did blog about it. i know it was for the best for me to be honest but why does it have to hurt so bad.. I know myself i can't move on with anything in my life till i start to respect and love me.. I have to work on myself to be able to give my all to anyone. I am even short changing my kids cause i am so stressed out and worried about things. I need to slow myself down and get me back on track.. And it the long run me needing to do that has hurt that person. I wish it was easy enough that things didnt happen this way but i can't help it. There is no way i can get things worked through if i dont take the time for myself. I just had to hurt people its never my intention but i do.. I feel i am toxic and if i am ever gonna be able to stop giving up and all i need to start working. I know i am just rambling here.. But i just had to say all this. I had to ge

Things've Changed
I saw a vision, just like a dream, didn't even know her name, I had to meet her, had to find a way, she seemed so perfect, in every way, I thought my life was, all fine and well, I made the money, had everything, so many women like drops of rain then I met her, things shot to hell, now all of that don't mean a thing now all I think of, is finding a way, to make her happy, to want to stay, yep I geuss it's true, not a damned thing I can do, Things've changed.. Music Video Codes By Music Jesus.com

Things From The Other Day
My chest hurts and I never know why. I hate how some people say that pain makes a person more interesting.....it only really makes them more miserable. But I guess that it is interesting to an outsider. The weather and walking on the ice has made my leg feel like it's broken all over again. Over three months of physical therapy and nothing to show for it. As I sit here thinking, I really wish that sometimes I could stay angry for longer, and feel hate, and just stop caring for some people. It hurts so much more when you continue to care about someone who only wanted to hurt you, and would hurt you again if you gave them a chance to. I also can't help wondering why I only get involved with people who hurt me. Why am I that gullible? We all want out, but none of us even know what "out" really is.

15 Things That Scare Men!
You probably think you know what frightens most men. A long-weekend at the in-laws' place. Antiquing. Running out of beer in the third quarter. But that's just the stuff he'll admit to being afraid of, which, by definition, means they're not his true deep fears. So how can you determine what those are? Easy: They're the ones he'll almost never talk about. But I will. Let's count down through the Scary Fifteen: #15 Hair in the drain. The first sign of male pattern baldness brings a man face-to-follicle with a skimpy aspect of his future. And it's always earlier than he expects or wants (which is, like, never). Logically, men know that baldness is as much of a part of life as Leno making Britney jokes. Logically, men know that being bald doesn't mean that they're any less smart, virile, or successful. Logically, men know that women don't care how much hair their men have. Logically, men know there are plenty of bald men who are comfortable in their skin--no matter how much of it th

~~things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do.
THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOUR CELL PHONE COULD DO. There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the p

Things That Annoy Me
Have you ever had one of those days where things annoy you until you want to snap at someone? People lying, taking advantage of others. Having a closed mind and judging things they don't know. Blaming mood swing and the inablity to control your tongue on being bi-polor or uni-polor. Oh I was drunk I didn't know what I was doing. Why do people think because they are drunk, on drugs or bi/uni polor that they are unaccountable for thier actions? You do something suck it up and deal with the reprcussions. You want to go off on someone for something they did? Be straight up and do it one on one. I don't want to hear it or have it taken out on me. If I am pissed I do the adult thing and take it to that person not the whole world. Don't blame it on a medical reason, drunk or drugs that you can't help yourself. It doesn't fly with me and you lose any respect I had for you. Also people take responsability for the raising of your kids. I am so tired of people dropping kids

The 10 Things In Life You Control
There are just a few aspectrs of life that we can truly control, and it's useful to know just what those areas are. If you don't know, you'll spend a lot of time blaming others for your own failings. Try and exert too much control in areas you shouldn't and the universe will create interesting ways to remind you of your place. So be prepared and learn the 10 things in life that you DO control: 1. What you do: Your actions are yours alone. You choose to make them or not make them and you are responsible for the effects of those actions. 2. What you say: Likewise, the words you speak (or write) are also consciously chosen. Like actions, they have an impact on your life and the lives of those you contact. 3. What you think: Yes, there are some subconscious thoughts that you can't control. But the things that you really think about, your beliefs,your ideals, etc. are concepts you have chosen to accept and believe in. Each day I will post a new blog that finishes up

Things Your Cell Phone Can Do
THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOUR CELL PHONE COULD DO. There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a lifesaver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door

5 Things I Hate At This Moment
1. The fact I can't sleep and I have to do stuff in the morning. 2. My neighbors across the street and their 5 kids that start yelling at 7 am. That's why they make muzzles. 3. Control Freaks I tend to run into. It's fun to humor them , trust me I don't really listen to anyone. Plus on a side note with this, it's sad that your ego's are so small that you have to lie about your life to get attention. Go away and find a nice dark place to go a clue 4. People that think bands like Poison , Warrant and Mr. Big were metal. Get a fucking clue. 5. People that "Care about you" that in the end fuck you over. I run into these fuckheads a lot. Ok I'm done now just wanted to make a blog.

Things On My Mind
The Dream By Charles Morrison I have dreamed many dreams I have dreamed my dreams I have lived my dreams I have seen my dreams come to pass I have seen my dreams crushed before my very feet So time has came to dream, to dream new dreams Time to live new dreams Time to see new dreams come to pass Holding to the hope that these new dreams will not be crushed No mater what happens in life, To dream new dreams To live new dreams.

Things To Wonder About
THINGS TO WONDER ABOUT 1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? 2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand? 3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? 4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? 5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? 6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing? 7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing? 8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges? 9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there? 10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting? 11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"? 12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected? 13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites? 14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things? 15 Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds? 16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay

30 Things I Learned From Porn
30 things I learned from porn 1. Women wear high heels to bed. 2. Men are never impotent. 3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory. 4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her. 5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm. 6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men. 7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob. 8. Women always orgasm when men do. 9. A blowjob will always get a woman out of a speeding ticket. 10. All women are noisy cummers. 11. People in the 70's couldn't cum unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background. 12. Those tits are real. 13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt. 14. Men always groan "OH YEAH!" when they cum. 15. If there is two of them they "high five" each other. (and the girl isn't disgusted!) 16. Double pen

Think Outside The Box
You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night, when you pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for the bus: 1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die. 2. An old friend who once saved your life. 3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about. Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing that there could only be one passenger in your car? Think before you continue reading... This is a moral/ethical dilemma that was once actually used as part of a job application. You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you should save her first; Or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this would be the perfect chance to pay him back. However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again. The candidate who was hired (out of 200 applicants) had no trouble coming up with his answer. He

Things To Ponder For 2007
> #10 Life is sexually transmitted. > > > #9 Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die. > > > #8 Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. > > > #7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks. > > > #6 Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. > > > #5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing. > > > #4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. > > > #3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents??? > > > #2 In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. > > > AND THE NUMBER ON

25 Thins My Mother Taught Me
25 things my mother taught me THINGS MY MOTHER TAUGHT ME 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why." 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. 'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." 7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the bac

...thinkin
I was jus thinkin again. How come I haven't met new people to hang out with. Is it because I never have anywhere to go, so I don't meet anyone because I am always out here. In the woods, alone. If I was in Houston it would be easy as hell to make new friends and new people to play with. Jess had no problem making new friends though. So there must me something do around here, unless all of them work together. I know she met Robbie at work, but what about all the other people. I want to go out and do stuff. I am sick of not having any fun. I get to have fun once a week on sundays. This sunday I get to install a sound system, yay! But anyway I have nowhere to go. How do you meet new people and make new friends? These online social networks aren't helping that is for sure. Its not like I'm the type of person that can just run into someone at a grocery store and start talking like I've known them forever. I can't even talk around my own friends sometimes. Just look at what happened at Appl

Think Of You
those old feelings come back when I think of you I begin to smile, the look in your eyes when I think of you I begin to laugh, the way you joke when I think of you I wonder how you are I wonder if you think of me too sitting here remembering the days we shared in each other's arms I remember you, and I smile when I think of you.

45 Things Woman Would Die For
45 things a girl would die for 1-touch their waist 2-talk to them 3-share secrets 4-give her your jacket 5-kiss them slowly are you remembering this? 6-hug her 7-hold her 8-laugh with her 9-invite her somewhere 10-let her be with you when you're with your friends keep reading 11-smile with her 12-take pics with her 13-pull her onto your lap 14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. fight back 15-when her friends say i love her more than you, deny it. fight back and hug her tight so she cant get to her friends. it makes her feel loved Are you thinking about someone? 16-always hug her and say i love you when you see her 17-kiss her unexpectedly 18-HUG HER FROM BEHIND AROUND THE WAIST 19-tell her shes beautiful not sexy! 20-tell her the way you feel about her! ..20 u need to show her you mean it too 21-kiss her on the lips 22-kiss her on her forhead 23-kiss her on top of her head 24-make her feel loved 25-we might d

10 Things To Point And Laugh At
10 thing to point and laugh at 10. Midget Cowboys 9. White guys wearing Roca Wear. 8. Dana Carvey's cinematic career. 7. The clerk in the movie store that recommends "Click". 6. People standing in line for tickets to the next Brooke Hogan concert. 5. Hookers. 4. Tree Huggers using posterboard signs attached to wooden sticks at a protest. 3. the 14 cop cars parked at the local Denny's. 2. anybody wearing an official NHL jersey. 1. People who sing along with Wham!

Thinking
Thinking about the other day Thinking about another way Thinking of all the things we say Thinking how the time does stray Thinking of you relieves the sorrow Thinking about a long tomorrow Thinking of those who like to borrow Thinking of friendships, oh so hollow Thinking as I lay with you here Thinking of easing all your fear Thinking of the last time I saw you tear Thinking how I wish for another year Thinking as I hear our song Thinking how it's been so long Thinking how they were wrong Thinking of us, oh so strong Thinking of what we might do today Thinking about what we did yesterday Thinking of your beauty as you obey Thinking how everything will be okay Thinking of something Thinking of nothing Thinking of why are we all really here Thinking of.......thank God the morning does appear

Things I Want To Say
Current Mood Crushed Betrayed which ever More Currently Listening to Baskstreet Boyz quit playin Games & Kid Rock I am who I am Tho these Past few days People have Promise they would call me Then Never do & dont show up online after they say it cuz they dont want me asking them why the hell they didnt call so Know what? dont Make a Promise that you cant Keep i am sick & Tired of People Lying to me & Going out of their ways to try & hurt me i have been trough hell & back these past few weeks because my mom has to get a heart scan because her heart is acting up I hate Guys I really do & I also Hate stupid bitches that think they know shit They Know Nothing about The past few weeks Ive had people say They like me Love me falling for me But Yet They Never prove it & Then You Go in a chat room & the same person who said they liked you compeletely lgnores You so whatever Go fiddle with Your little Girlfriend cuz I dont need this Bullshit also I had someone tell me hes falling for me B

100 Things About Me
Just some known facts about me. Enjoy. 1)I hate spiders well any type of reptiles freak me out 2)I've stripped naked once because I had a cockroach crawl on me 3)I feel as if I should have been born in the 50's 4)I tend to do things on impulse 5)I sleep naked 6)I have OCD. I can't stand things being out of order. Clean freak. ( Not totally a freak) I have kids and can handle a little bit of a mess. Just rather have it clean. Wouldn't anyone? 7)I drink to run away from my problems 8)I have low self-esteem 9)I'm a horrible speller 10)I'm in love with someone ill never be with 11)I love cheesecake more then I do chocolate 12)I love to cook 13)I take 40 minute + showers 14)Most of my dreams come true "Good and bad" 15)I regret not having a white wedding 16)I've committed my own emotional suicide 17)I like having control 18)I cry when I'm angry 19)I'm extremely sensitive 20)I'm a hopeless romantic 21)I have trust issues

40 Things You’ll Never Hear A Southern Man Say
Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen. I'll take Shakespeare for $1,000, Alex. Duct tape won't fix that. Honey, I think we should sell the pickup and buy a family sedan. Come to think of it, I will have a martini. We don't keep firearms in this house. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer? You can't feed that to the dog. I thought Graceland was tacky. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe Wrestling's fake. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace? We're vegetarians. Do you think my gut is too big? I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy. Honey, we don't need another dog. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War? Give me the small bag of pork rinds. Too many deer heads detract from the décor. Spittin' is such a nasty habit. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today. Trim the fat off that steak. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso. The tires on that truck are too big.

Things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do.
There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a life saver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door and have the person at your home press the unlock button, holding it nea

29 Things To Make You Smile
TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE 1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't. 2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. 3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them. 4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. 5. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. 6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me 7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. 8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. 9. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing. 10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. 11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine. 12. God must love stupid people; He made so many. 13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. 14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. 15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? 16. Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it! 17. Wrinkl

Think About It - My Favorites
There is always more misery among the lower classes than there is humanity in the higher. - Victor Hugo (1862) They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin (1759) I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. - Thomas Jefferson Do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life. Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something. - Henry David Thoreau The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them. - Mark Twain (1935) Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple. - Barry Switzer

Things Change
Will you listen to my words, Reaching deep within their meaning, Feeling everything they hold inside. Would you look into it's windows, To see who lives inside? Would you read my poem, To taste the sweetened heart of it? Would you take the time, To smell it's sweet fragrance, Dancing before your senses? Would you tell me if you were upset with me, Because I feel like my life is a mistake? Will you forgive me, When I tell you it won't happen again? I had no idea it would be a problem. Would you wipe away my tears, When I tell that I'm sorry for the words I write? When I ask you if things have changed, Could you answer me knowing how you felt? I've given you my truth without knowing. Would you just jump in your car and run, When I told you I don't want things to be this way? Will you press play to hear my heart calling out? Wring my neck, twist by twist, Until the brighest stars flame out. When I say g'bye, Will you realize the reason I have left? I c

Things
life just keeps throwing curves at me these days it seems I feel like I have been in a nightmare I havent forgotten about anyone nor am I being rude real life is my first priority as I would hope it is for you all at any rate I have finally responded back to all emails and will get to comments as soon as possible to those who are aware whats going on and have sent your blessings thank you ...those who have my number feel free to call if you dont you may leave me yours I hope all is weel with all of you..have a kick ass week xoxo K

Things That Sound Dirty
TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT AT THE OFFICE AREN'T: 10. I need to whip it out by 5. 9. Mind if I use your laptop? 8. Just stick it in my box. 7. If I have to lick one more, I'll gag! 6. I want it on my desk, NOW!!!!! 5. HMMMMMMMMM, I think it's out of fluid! 4. My equipment is so old, it takes forever to finish. 3. It's an entry level position. 2. When do you think you'll be getting off today? And the number 1 thing that sounds dirty but at the office but it isn't: 1. It's not fair. I do all the work while he just sits there!!! -------------------- TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY, BUT IN LAW AREN'T: 10. Have you looked through her briefs? 9. He is one hard judge! 8. Counselor, let's do it in chambers. 7. Her attorney withdrew at the last minute. 6. Is it a penal offense? 5. Better leave the handcuffs on. 4. For $2

Things I Will Do
I basically have always been my main entertainer and thats ok with me. When other people try to get me down I just am the one I turn to for reassurance that it really is ok. When I go to sleep at night I know I am a good person and that's all that matters. 1. go back to minnesota and go to the lake 2. go back to london and party with the london guys with fucked up teeth 3. party with Lisa...WI style 4. Mardi gras in Rio!!! 5. get a boat a travel the greek isles 6. go for a walk in the woods 7. always be honest (I am always 99 %) 8. Route 66 driving 9. meet pete in real life 10. sail around south america 11. learn the culture of mexico city 12. go to a indian medicine man 13. drink on the rocks in monterey again while watching the sunset 14. Tell the bitches to fuck off 15. set my mom straight once and for all 16. make out more, look em in the eyes 17. start to write a book, more writing 18. have one more baby 19. go camping woooo hoooo 20. go to the graveyard to ch

101 Things Not To Say During Sex
1. But everybody looks funny naked! 2. You woke me up for that? 3. Did I mention the video camera? 4. Do you smell something burning? 5. (In a janitor's closet) And they say romance is dead... 6. Try breathing through your nose. 7. A little rug burn never hurt anyone! 8. Is that a Medic-Alert Pendant? 9. Sweetheart, did you lock the back door? 10. But whipped cream makes me break out. 11. Person 1: This is your first time... right? Person 2: Yeah... today. 12. Hurry up! This room rents by the hour! 13. Can you please pass me the remote control? 14. Do you accept Visa? 15. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz 16. On second thought, let's turn off the lights. 17. And to think -- I was really trying to pick up your friend! 18. So much for mouth-to-mouth. 19. (Using body paint) Try not to leave any stains, okay? 20. Hope you're as good looking when I'm sober... 21. (Holding a banana) It's just a little trick I learned at the zoo!

Think And Remember (poetry)
Think and Remember I wish I could rewind time to see your smile one more time. To hear the laughter that came so easily with a warm smile. The warmth of a protective hand on my shoulder. To hear the warmth of your voice shooing away a child's troubled fears. Is it wishful thinking that I hear your voice on a stray breeze? The warmth of your hand upon my shoulder when I grow to troubled? A man larger then life A man who filled so many broken hearts with hope and love once more. Could death truly take you away from us so fully. Never to see or feel your touching presence once more. A cynical mind would say yes. How could such a thing be? Yet I know each spring your there. Nurturing and renewing hope as always within me. Keeping me warm and safe in winters harshest of storms. A guiding hand on my shoulder and steering when the road grows to long. Death may have taken you from us. Yet not even death can keep us from you. I know all I ha

60 Things Not To Say To A Naked Guy
1. I've smoked fatter joints than that. 2. Ahh, it's cute. 3. Who circumcised you? 4. Why don't we just cuddle? 5. You know they have surgery to fix that. 6. It's more fun to look at. 7. Make it dance. 8. You know, there's a tower in Italy like that. 9. Can I paint a smiley face on that? 10. It looks like a night crawler. 11. Wow, and your feet are so big. 12. My last boyfriend was 4'' bigger. 13. It's ok, we'll work around it. 14. Is this a mild or a spicy Slim Jim? 15. Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh. 16. Will it squeak if I squeeze it? 17. Oh no, a flash headache. 18. (giggle and point) 19. Can I be honest with you? 20. My 8-year-old brother has one like that. 21. Let me go get my tweezers. 22. How sweet, you brought incense. 23. This explains your car. 24. You must be a growing boy. 25. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow. 26. Thanks, I needed a toothpick. 27. Are you one of those pygmies? 28. Have you ever thought of worki

Thinkin Out Loud
I was listenin to a couple songs on my imeem player and it kinda put me in that mood to start asking questions like amerie said why don't we fall in love but we all claim to love somebody. And also like eve song love is blind even though i agree with dat i still wonder why people make the sacrifice of if they spouse don't want you to be friends wit yo best friend. I know my best friend is a girl and if my girlfriend can't handle that then we don't need to be together cuz Ya'll know women/men come and go but friends are forever well anyway let me get back to the music after those songs went off i listened to nas's if heaven was a mile away. Yeah i know this song is old but let me end this blog with this question feel free to give me the answer. If heaven was a mile away, would you go and leave the world behind? Why or why not?

Think On It
Hi Everyone, If anyone out there believes America should pull out of Iraq, I strongly urge you to read this letter. The threat we faced in Europe in the 1940s, as great as it was, does not compare to what we face now. How do you confront an army that does not wear uniforms and covers its face like the cowards they are? In addition we have a political party that gives aid to the enemy by demanding that we "surrender" and tells the enemy that we will leave Iraq on a given date. That is INSANITY and in my humble opinion it is Treason! PLEASE, READ THE FOLLOWING !!!!! ----- Subject: : Spain Subject: Spain Just one man's opinion, but it seems to have some validity in today's world. SPANISH NEWSPAPER ARTICLE KEEP IT FOREMOST IN YOUR THINKING THAT THIS WAS WRITTEN BY A SPANISH WRITER ABOUT SPAIN AND EUROPE "ALL EUROPEAN LIFE DIED IN AUSCHWITZ " By Sebastian Vilar Rodrigez(*)

10 Things About Me......
GET TO KNOW ME!! OK HERE'S HOW THIS WORK I WILL TELL YOU TEN THING'S ABOUT ME THEN I WILL PICK TEN PEOPLE TO DO THE SAME THING THIS IS A GOOD WAY FOR US ALL TO GET TO KNOW THE PEOPLE WE CHAT WITH AND CALL OUR FRIENDS I THINK IF YOUR MY FRIEND YOU'D LIKE TO KNOW ALL YOU CAN AS I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW ABOUT YOU SO IF I PICK YOU YA GOTTA PLAY DAMMIT LOL 1) Ive worked since I was 13 2) I was adopted at birth my birth mother was only 12 3) Im a beauty school drop-out they told me I couldnt bleach hair and I walked out.... 4) I have 27 tattoos and 9 piercings (I love the adrenaline of it all and have been known to sleep through getting inked) 5) I now work doing payroll for people I hire to take care of Developmentally Disabled clients and I love every aspect of my career 6) I haven't drank or smoked pot in almost 10 years (didn't have a problem with either just not my thing) 7) I do smoke cigs (menthols) and have for almost 20 years 8) Everyday for the last almost 8 years I h

Thinking
Right now I'm so confused, not sure what to do about how I feel. I swore I wouldn't let my feelings get the best of me. But it seems that I have that is why I'm confused. I can't seem to make a clear decision about things. One minute I am sure it's ok for something to happen then the next I'm getting mad, upset, or just unsure about things. Then it makes someone else have to make decisions I'm sure they don't want to make. So I'm sitting here trying to make a decision that I'm not sure I can make and be happy with or make and live with the outcome of it. So my confusion grows with every thought I have. I wish I was someone else somewhere else right now....

Things That R Collectors
PEOPLE WHO ARE OUT THERE AN CAN HELP IT WOULD BE APPICIATE. I HAVE A ROBERT BATMAN PICTURE..STUFF ON ROYAL FAMILY AN ELVIS PRESLEY-I ALSO HAVE STAMP COLLECTION-BASE BALL PICTURES-OLD HOCKEY PICTURE AN ALOT MORE BUT TO MUCH TO PUT DOWN .AS YOUS ALL KNOW I MOVED TO A SMALLER PLACE AN DONT HAVE ROOM FOR IT ALL NOW.. SO PLZ GET BACK TO ME IF YOU KNOW ANY ONE THATS INTERESTED IN ANYTHING.THX ALOT. DARLIN MOTHER

70 Things O Crap
70 Odd Questions What is your middle name? Emily What color is your mailbox? metal? Are you single? ya huh Have you ever hit a deer? no but ive eaten one Do you have to drive over a bridge to get home? fuck NO! What color is your room? red n black Do you have a small driveway? do you have a small ass? Do you know anyone with the same ringtone as you? no huh What do you do first in the morning? tell monkey to shut up What brand is your printer? hp Do you enjoy fighting with people? most of the time...unless they're stupid Is your hair naturally straight or curly? curly like a mo fo Who was your kindergarten teacher? some dead lady What is your ringtone? get your freak on Are you taller than your mom? nope What curse word do you say the most when your pissed? motherless sons of bitches Are you God? not last time i checked... Do you like someone? *whistles* Do you enjoy writing in colored pens? i hate colored pe

100 Things About Lil Ole Me
100 truths 1. real name ¨ Kristin 2. nickname ¨ Katt 3. single or taken ¨ Single 4. zodiac sign ¨ Cancer 5. male or female ¨ Bitch 6. elementary ¨ Nunya 7. middle ¨ Yah Right 8. high ¨ Do I have fuckin idiot across my head? 9. eye color ¨ Hazel / Orange 10. hair color ¨ Blonde and Brown and Burgundy underneath 11. long or short ¨ MIddle of back 12. current location ¨ West Coast 13. body type ¨ Sporty? I played soccer for 16years 14. are you a virgin ¨ My nostrils are 15. are you health freak ¨ No 16. height ¨ 5'4 17. do you have a crush on someone ¨ Sure the hell do 18. do you like yourself ¨ Yuppers Id do me 19. piercings¨ 9 20. tattoos ¨ 27 21. righty or lefty ¨ Righty FIRSTS : 22. surgery ¨ On my eye I split my iris open 23. piercing ¨ ears 24. tatoo ¨ dolphins 25. sport ¨ Soccer 26. pet ¨ Guinea Pigs 27. vacation ¨ Disneyland 28. concert ¨ haha Jefferson Starship

Think Of Me
I think of you in winter When snow is on the ground I think of you in spring time when dafodils abound theres not a day goes by that your not on my mind a very prescous freind gentle good and kind So when Im feeling lonely and need a freind whos true I know you will give me comfort as I walk down lifes path with you Thank you for being a wonderful freind

Thinking
I live each day as if it were my last and by doing so I know that I can't let my self down I can only grow and make my self a better person over all. don't let things from the past effect who you are today because each day you are still growing into who you are to become.

Thinking Of You
Forever is the strangest thing: It's shorter than you think. It starts at any time you like And ends in just a wink. You can forever be: right now Is just as good as then. The moment is quite all there is, No matter where or when. The moment is eternity, And now is just a dream. We see our lives in futures past, But that's just how things seem. Beyond the motion of the mind Is something that is true: As awesome as the universe, As small as me and you.

Think About It !!!
We run around , like chicken with no brains, work our buds of like horses, spend everything we make like pigs trying to fuck everything we see on the street like a dog, blind like a mole in our holes, scared like a rabbit for about everything. running around the same old ground, like a fish in a fish bow .... woooow ain't we Superior ?????

Think Of The Soldier
Think of the soldier Not everyone can understand The soldier will die on command He will fight for our freedom to be, Even when we disagree While some lounge around and have a beer The soldier will fight on, through sheer fear Even after we forget, He’ll be ready to pour sweat Though never saying his goodbyes; The soldier will fight till he dies While we may never forgive Think of the soldier, and what he’s prepared to give. So bear in mind when you pray, There’s a soldier giving his life away

Things That Sound Dirty At Thanksgiving, But Aren't
"Whew, that's one terrific spread!" "I'm in the mood for a little dark meat." "Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist." "Talk about a huge breast!" "It's Cool Whip time!" "If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!" "Are you ready for seconds yet?" "Are you going to come again next time?" "It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?" "Just wait your turn, you'll get some!" "Don't play with your meat." "Just spread the legs open & stuff it in." "Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?" "I didn't expect everyone to come at once!" "You still have a little bit on your chin." "Use a nice smooth stroke when you whip it." "How long will it take after you stick it in?" "You'll know it's ready when it pops up." "Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!" "How many are coming?" "That's the biggest one I've ever seen!" "Just lay back & take it easy...I'll do the rest." "How long do I beat it bef

Things To Do In An Elevator
1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off. 2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your Kleenex to other passengers. 3. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly. 4. Bring a chair along. 5. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?" 6. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom. 7. Do Tai Chi exercises. 8. Meow occasionally. 9. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons. 10. Say "Ding!" at each floor. 11. Lean against the button panel. 12. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator. 13. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them. 14. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other people "through" it. 15. Start a sing-along. 16. Crack open y

60 Things Not To Say To A Naked Man
60 things NOT to say to a naked man Current mood: bored Category: Romance and Relationships 1. I've smoked fatter joints than that. 2. Ahh, it's cute. 3. Who circumcised you? 4. Why don't we just cuddle? 5. You know they have surgery to fix that. 6. It's more fun to look at. 7. Make it dance. 8. You know, there's a tower in Italy like that. 9. Can I paint a smiley face on that? 10. It looks like a night crawler. 11. Wow, and your feet are so big. 12. My last boyfriend was 4'' bigger. 13. It's ok, we'll work around it. 14. Is this a mild or a spicy Slim Jim? 15. Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh. 16. Will it squeak if I squeeze it? 17. Oh no, a flash headache. 18. (giggle and point) 19. Can I be honest with you? 20. My 8-year-old brother has one like that. 21. Let me go get my tweezers. 22. How sweet, you brought incense. 23. This explains your car. 24. You must be a growing boy. 25. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow. 26. Thanks, I needed a toothpick.

The Thing With Being Single
is when you get back from the doctors office and you have noone to talk to about what happened when you have other things going on and noone to haggle back and forth with.When there'a all that money and noone to share it with.Dreams that never get shared when they come true...Just a few random thoughts going thru my head...

25 Things Never To Say To A Naked Man ...
1. I’ve smoked fatter joints than that. 2. Ahhhh, it’s cute. 3. Why don’t we just cuddle... 4. You know they have surgery to fix that. 5. Make it dance. 6. Can I paint a smiley face on it? 7. Wow, and your feet are so big. 8. It’s OK, we’ll work around it... 9. Will it squeak if I squeeze it? 10. It’s a good thing you have so many other talents 11. (giggle and point) 12. Can I be honest with you? 13. Does it come with an air pump? 14. This explains your car. 15. Maybe if we water it, it’ll grow. 16. So this is why you judge people on their personalities. 17. At least this won’t take long. 18. I never saw one like that before. 19. But it still works, right? 20. It looks so unused. 21. Maybe it looks better in natural light. 22. Are you cold? 23. If you get me real drunk first. 24. Is that an optical illusion? 25. What is that?

The Things I Am Asked
Hey all!! I have been asked a few questions and well seeing how I am such a nice Man Raper I will answer the questions: What do I smell like...Well on a good day...the body soap I use smells like cocnut, TIGI All Sexed Up (at least I think that is what it is called) and that smells like grapefruit lemonade, my lotion is well a body butter from the Body Shop...either coconut or sweet pea. So I guess I smell fruity and flowerie. No I will not take a naked pic of my tushie NO ONE needs to see that, nor do I do open "woo woo" shots. I guess if you have any ohter questions for me let me know!!!!

20 Things Girls Want Guys To Know
1. We love when you cuddle us. 2. A kiss on the cheek is a definate yes. 3. We want you to put your arm around us at the movies. 4. We don't care if your the strongest guy in the world. 5. Size doesn't matter so don't tell us. 6. We don't always look our best so get over it. 7. We shouldn't have to plan everything. 8. We're always ready to talk so call us. 9. We're not perfect so deal with it. 10. We love surprises. 11. The little things you do mean the most. 12. We're not always girly girls. 13. We can like boy stuff too. 14. Cursing & fighting don't impress us. 15. Don't be mean to us to get our attention. 16. Don't tell us who is hot because we don't care. 17. We can tell when you're not listening so listen up. 18. When we say we are cold that's our invitation to come closer. 19. Hugs mean more sometimes. 20. We need your advice sometimes so don't be afraid to give it to us.

10 Things About Sex
10 THINGS ABOUT SEX Body: 1. The typical lovemaking session lasts around 15 minutes: roughly 10 to 12 minutes of foreplay and around 3 to 5 minutes of intercourse. 2. Humans aren't the only horny members of the animal kingdom doing it just for fun. Dolphins and a type of chimpanzee called the bonobo have also been observed engaging in sexual activity when they are not in their natural reproductive cycles. 3. While Viagra has made erectile dysfunction (affecting 10 to 12 percent of men) a household phrase, the opposite problem -- premature ejaculation -- is more common (affecting 24 to 27 percent of men). The U.S. Food and Drug Administration is currently reviewing a drug called dapoxetine as a cure for this problem. 4. Crank up that thermostat... orgasms may be more intense in warmer conditions. The degree of vasocongestion, reddening or darkeing of the skin known as the "sex flush," is both more common in warmer temperatures and an indication of how intense an orgasm may b

Things You Should Know But Probably Don't...
THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW BUT PROBABLY DON'T... 1 . Money isn't made out of paper, it's made out of cotton.. 2. The Declaration of Independence was written on hemp (marijuana) paper 3. The dot over the letter i is called a "tittle". 4. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top. 5. Susan Lucci is the daughter of Phyllis Diller. 6. 40% of McDonald's profits come from the sales of Happy Meals. 7. 315 entries in Webster's 1996 Dictionary were misspelled. 8. The 'spot' on 7UP comes from its inventor, who had red eyes. He was albino. 9. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents, daily. 10. Warren Beatty and Shirley MacLaine are brother and sister. 11. Chocolate affects a dog's heart and nervous system; a few ounces will kill a small sized dog. 12. Orcas (killer whales) kill sharks by torpedoing up into the shark's stomach from underneath, causing the shark to e

Things You Need To Know.
As you prepare yourself to join my cult, you should know the things that piss me off. So that you can avoid doing them. On second thought... it might be easier to list the things that don't piss me off. um... On third thought, you'll just have to figure them out as you go. Now bring me a beverage.

Things Not To Say To A Naked Guy
1. I've smoked fatter joints than that. 2. Ahh, it's cute. 4. Why don't we just cuddle? 5. You know they have surgery to fix that. 8. You know, there's a tower in Italy like that. 11. Wow, and your feet are so big. 12. My last boyfriend was 4'' bigger. 15. Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh. 16. Will it squeak if I squeeze it? 18. (giggle and point) 19. Can I be honest with you? 20. My 8-year-old brother has one like that. 22. How sweet, you brought incense. 23. This explains your car. 24. You must be a growing boy. 25. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow. 29. Every heard of clearasil? 32. Why is God punishing you? 33. At least this won't take long. 36. But it still works, right? 38. It looks so unused. 39. Do you take steroids? 42. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes? 43. Oh, I didn't know you were in an accident. 46. Are you cold? 47. If you get me real drunk first. 49. What is that? 52. It's a good thing you have so many other talents. 54. So this

Think Before Speaking
OK NOW THAT I GOT UR ATTENTION LISTEN UP. I AM SICK N TIRED OF HAVING PPL TELL ME TIME N TIME AGAIN THAT I NEED TO STOP BEING SERIOUS OR THAT I NEED TO GIVE THEM A CHANCE. FIRST OF ALL I AM 25 YRS OLD. I MIGHT BE IN A WHEELCHAIR BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN SHIT FOR THE SIMPLE FACT THAT I AM SINGLE N ON MY OWN... AGAIN I AM SINGLE... DO I LIKE BEING SINGLE? NO. BUT ITS MY CHOICE CUZ ALL GUYS NOWADAYS WANT TO DO IS MEET U FOR SOME FUN. I AM TOO DAMN GROWN FOR THAT. IF YA WANT TO GO SLEEP AROUND THEN GO AHEAD BUT DO NOT THINK IM GOING TO SLEEP WITH YA. I HAVE WAY TOO MUCH RESPECT FOR MY BODY. IF YA CANT SEEM TO RESPECT THAT AND ONLY WANT SEX OR SEE ME NAKED THEN GUESS WHAT DELETE ME FROM UR LIST CUZ IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN! GOT ME! CARMEN... PS. I CAN CARELESS WHO IS OFFENDED WITH THIS MESSAGE... IF YA DONT READ IT THEN U R NOT A FRIEND N ONLY WANT SEX.

Think You Know Me?
Think You Know Me? Think You Know Me??? Fill this out.... 1. Who are you? 2. Are we friends? 3. When and how did we meet? 4. How have I affected you? 5. What do you think of me? 6. What's the fondest memory you have of me? 7. How long do you think we will be friends? 8. Do you love me? 9. Do you have a crush on me? 10. Would you kiss me? 11. Would you hug me? 12. Physically, what stands out about me? 13. Emotionally, what stands out about me? 14. Do you wish I was cooler? 15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I? 16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it. 17. Am I loveable? 18. How long have you known me? 19. Describe me in one word. 20. What was your first impression? 21. Would you do me? 22. Would you give me your number? 23. What is it? *Send me a private message with the answers then repost*

Think On This ...
And as He hath given, "If ye love me, keep my commandments; for they are not grievous to bear. For I will bear them with thee, I will wipe away thy tears; I will comfort the brokenhearted, I will bring all to those in the ways that are in the Wisdom of God for thy expressions through each experience, in each activity of thine." For thy soul in its Wisdom seeketh expression with Him. Smother it not in the doubts and the fears of materiality but in the spirit of love and truth that encompasseth all, and that is open to ye who have set thy hearts, thy faces, toward the love that is in Jesus, thy Friend, thy Brother. Edgar Cayce Reading 262-105

Thinking About
Thinking about starting up an online business. I make beauty and bath products as well as a few other things. Below is a list of items that I make. If you are interested in anything please send me a message. Trying to see what people would be more interested in. Everything is made with natural products. Bath Salts Massage Oils Oatmeal Baths Body Scrubs- 3 types available: Salt, Sugar, Oatmeal Foaming Cleanser Cream Cleanser Gentle Facial Toner Lip Balm Eye Cream Shower Gel Hand Balm Aromatherapy Perfumes altar oils Candles Many scents will be available. Other products might be by request. Everything will be made to order. PLEASE send me a message if you are interested.

Thinking
it was a very torturing day i had loooong meetings, then filling out papers for the contract, and doing other things and calling people and and and... and i didn't count the rehab this morning and YES it hurted LOTS: he's making me do different excercises involving my ankle and today those ones started to hurt me i have to give a big Thank You to all that were worried about me, and a big thanks for the ones that showed me lots of love latelly :) i know i'm not perfect lol but yes i do try to give me best so, thanks for your big big patience and of course for the love! (that doesn't come with rating all pics, i mean about just a simple comment or private message or shout saying hello hun!) love you all lots! nite nite :-*

Things To Think About
What I Am Learning I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes. I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it. I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better have a big willy or big boobs. I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others – they are more screwed up than you think. I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities. I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it. I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. Appreciate it Maybe something good will happen. If not, tough shit. Life Hap

~things That Make Me Happy~(smile)
~Things That Make Me Happy~(smile) Current mood: "flippin' Sweet" Category: "flippin' Sweet" Life Watching Nascar~ Tony Stewart~ ;) The sun on my face, on a cool day~ Talking to my seany(best friend)~ Helping someone who really needs it~ The color pink~ Shasta Daisies~ Watching Napoleon Dynamite~ The smell of the ocean~ Will Ferrell~ Cuddling with my kiddo's~ Playing outside, barefoot in the rain~ Time alone~ Robot Chicken~ Jim Carey~ Singing a great song, in the car, top down~ A hot bubble bath~ Jamie fox(when he was on in living color)~ People who are sweet to me~ Jude Law~ Speaking with a british accent~ The smell of oranges~ The sight of a beautiful man~ Putting on something new~ Seeing Alyssa happy~ Taking pictures~ Driving alyssa crazy by singing something she hates~ Spending time with frantastic~ Watching Blue's Clue's~ ~Patrice~

Things On Ct That Have Started To Get To Me.
CONTESTS!!!11!!!one... WTF Is up with these things. I mean they aren't even about who is actually the "hottest girl" or the "coolest tat" or w/e they on. I mean its all about how many friends you can annoy enough to start bombing your shit and come on, not a damn person on CT likes to spend 30 min of their time bombing something. No one should like that. I mean I have 300 or so friends and at least 50 of em are in some kinda contest right now. I usually bomb a good 100 comments or so.... so to try to keep up with that is impossible since it would be around 5000 comments a day... and then you know what happens the next day? I'm still not in first... or I dropped to second! or do you think you can do it again? I mean this is seriously rediculous. There has to be a better way to run contests on this site that doesn't involve such time consumption and the winners actually deserve it. For the record this isn't because of some grudge or somethin I have, just gettin sick of seeing 200

Thinking Of You.....
I can't sleep tonight thinking about all of the things I want to do to you. Thinking about the feelings I want to make you feel. I want to play the game of seduction and watch your body shake in need of me. I want to control you with my kisses and crumble at your command. As I lay in bed dreaming of you there is a knock at my door. I am so lost in my fantasy I do not think that it is real. I hear it again but this time it is louder. This knock startles me from my place of haven and thrusts me back into a lonely reality. Once realizing what is happening I jump out of bed and run to the door. As I look through the peep hole I know that I am dreaming. There you stand looking more amazing then I have ever imagined. I stand there in awe for so long that you turn to walk away. I swing the door open and tell you to wait. You smile at me and say that you thought I would never answer and ask you to come in. Without a word I open the door enough for you to come in. I ask if everything is ok

30 Things Stressed Women May Say At Work
30 THINGS STRESSED WOMEN MAY SAY AT WORK 1. Okay, okay! I take it back. And screw you. 2. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing. 3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up. 4. Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine? 5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after. 6. Do I look like a people person? 7. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting. 8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left. 9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose. 10. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control? 11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years. 12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer. 13. Do they ever shut up on your planet? 14. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable. 15. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't gone to sleep yet! 16. Back off!! You're standing in my aura. 17.

Things That Make Me Happy
1. playing dungeons and dragons type of games - is my escape from reality 2. Riding my 10 speed bike along the river for hours on end 3. Making craft items for my neices 4. Listening to music 5. Cooking for others and doing things for others just to see them be happy for once 6. A special lady and her children - that used to be in my life - my fault Someone recently told me that i need to go back to the basics and regain my happiness before I can truly make anyone else happy. I guess I lost site of that aspect of life. To her and her kids, I am truly sorry. To myself, I seek the answers and critism to find myself again.

Things I've Learned
1. No matter how bad you want something, If its not meant to be, no amount of anything you do will make it happen. 2. Looks or popularity doesnt really matter in the scheme of things. 3. No matter how bad a situation or person may drive yo nuts at the end of the day you cant wait to spend time with them. 4. Life has a way of working itself out for the best in the end. 5. No matter how stressful being a single mother can be, coming home from work the first thing you want is to put that child in your arms.. 6. People that dont like you, blow it off cuz in the end you get the last laugh cuz you make more money then them at work... 7. With self growth, you cant expect others to be impressed, your the one that should... 8. Baby kisses are the best!!! *smiles*

Thinking
2NITE IM A LONE THINKING ABOUT MY SON IF HEWAS HERE .WOULD THINGS BEBETER 4 ME WOULD I FEEL ALONE.I WISH I HAD THAT 1 SHOT FIND OUT .U NO I LOST MY SON NOW I GAINED SOMETHING WITCH WAS MOLLY SHES MY LIL ANGEL ANGEL IM ALWAYS THERE PLEASE JUST VIST ME THIS TIME LOVE U ANGEL

Think Im Leaving Awhile
i want to thank !FN~crazy`Bitch (prob spelt wrong) and def Jan doll that she is suppports me so and al for being so great too me but I need a break I try in my enept way help all i comment blast and try to rate comment as many a day i can but outta of all those i do im get 29 people and most of those didnt even know me or on my list so im going quit a bit i know my 10 20 pts dont make or break any1 but damn at least i tried unlike quite a few and the lies to see my adult unreal i think i am deleting like I said my real friends fans know where too find me

41 Things Guys Do Wrong While Having Sex
1) Avoiding her lips and diving straight for the erogenous zones makes her feel like you're paying by the hour and trying to get your money's worth by cutting out nonessentials. A proper passionate kiss is the ultimate form of foreplay. 2) BLOWING TOO HARD IN HER EAR. Admit it, some kid at school told you girls love this. Well, there's a difference between being erotic and blowing as if you're trying to extinguish the candles on your 50th birthday cake. That hurts. 3) NOT SHAVING. We often forget we have a porcupine strapped to our chin which you rake repeatedly across your partner's face and thighs. When she turns her head from side to side, it's not passion, it's avoidance. 4) SQUEEZING HER BREAST. Most of us act like a housewife testing a melon for ripeness when they get their hand on a pair. Stroke, caress, and smooth them. 5) BITING HER NIPPLES. Why do we fasten onto a woman's nipples, then clamp down like we're trying to deflate her body via her breasts?

Think On This ...
Think on This ... That there have been many problems and many questionings is true; yet when the entity has allowed or does allow itself to meditate upon the principles of the prompting which come from its study, its application of the law of the Lord which is manifested in the precepts, the commandments, the psalms and the promises of Jesus, little has been the fear of what the man-force has to offer as to disturbing factors in the earth. Then, as would be given, keep that faith . . . Do not let those things which may not in the present be understood weary thy soul, but know that sometime, somewhere, you, too, will understand. Keep the faith. Edgar Cayce Reading 5369-2

10 Things To Ponder
>>>>Number 10 > >>>>Life is sexually transmitted. > >>>> > >>>>Number 9 > >>>>Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can > >>>>die. > >>>> > >>>>Number 8 > >>>>Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without > >>>>an erection, make him a sandwich. > >>>> > >>>>Number 7 > >>>>Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person > >>>>to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. > >>>> > >>>>Number 6 > >>>>Some people are like a Slinky.....not really good for anything, > >>>>but you still can't help but smile whe n you shove them down the > >>>>stairs. > >>>> > >>>>Number 5 > >>>>Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals > >>>>dying of nothing. > >>>> > >>>>Number 4 > >>>>All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no > >>>>attention to criticism. > >>>> > >>>>Number 3 > >>>>Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a > >>>>substantial tax c

Thinking
Love is but a whisper. Seduction is nothing less than a wonderful gift. How you fill my body with so much lust, it kills me. Everday that passes I stop, close my eyes and I can feel your soft hands brush across my soft, supple skin, making me shake in thoughts of you next to me. You are my need, my want, my every desire. I close my eyes, feel your body on me, pressing against me as you start to udder but a word in my ear, making me hotter and hotter. You know just the right touch, just the right words. You tell me how much you need me in your life, that just one touch, one breath or look I give, sends desires you have never experienced before through your whole mind and body. You look into my eyes, your hands move to my hips, I kiss you deeply, seductively. We both moan to the touch. You brush your hands across my face and through my long soft hair; I am at your mercy baby. You turn me around, kiss the back of my neck, as you know that one touch sends desires through my who

Things You Can Do When High
1.Rock out to the same song for hours 2.Watch cartoons 3.Eat a box of capt'n crunch 4.Use things you find around the house to make pipes and bongs 5.Start a band 6.Make up a comic book staring you and your stoner friends 7.Try to count to 100000 8.Rock out to the Led Zeppelin box set in a smokey room 9.Make funny faces 10.Eat 10 PB&J's and have some milk (If you like this and you would like to see your ideas on the list just let me know)

Think On This ...
For the greater individual is the one who is the servant of all. And to conquer self is greater than taking many cities. For, here ye may find humbleness as against that which cries oft for expression, and the feeling of not being appreciated. Express it more in the greater amount of love upon those who may be aided through thy effort. For, remember, man looks upon the things of the day but God looks upon the heart. Edgar Cayce Reading 3253-2

20 Things To Remember...
"20 TRUTHS TO REMEMBER" 1) Faith is the ability not to panic 2) If you worry, you didn't pray. If you pray - don't worry 3) As a child of God, prayer is like calling home every day 4) Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape 5) When we get tangled up in our problems, be still. God wants us to be still, - so He can untangle the knot 6) Do the math. Count your blessings 7) God wants spiritual fruit. Not religious nuts 8) Dear God: I have a problem - It's ME! 9) Silence is often misinterpreted, but never misquoted 10) Laugh every day; It's like inner jogging 11) The most important things in your home are the people 12) Growing old is inevitable - Growing up is optional 13) There is no key to happiness. The door is always open 14) A grudge is a heavy thing to carry 15) He who dies with the most toys, is still dead! 16) We do not remember days - but moments. Life moves too fast, so enjoy your precious

6 Things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do!
Read More About: Cell Phones (827) Six Things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do Here are useful tips and tricks that you can teach even an old cell phone to do. Cyrus Farivar, PC World Monday, February 05, 2007 01:00 AM PST Right before your eyes, your cell phone has morphed into a portable computer. Whether you're searching Google via text messages, using Short Message Service (SMS) to make international calls, or e-mailing a voice message, these tips will help jump-start your cell phone's inner PC--and make your life easier to boot. Text Your Google Search For the price of sending a text message, you can unleash the power of Google without having to open a Web browser. Just text GOOGL (46645) to get access to much of the search giant's most useful information, including addresses and phone numbers, word definitions, numeric and other conversions, weather, and even sports scores. For example, if you want to look up the phone number of a pizza joint to place a

Thinking About Getting Off Tap
I'm thinking about getting off tap because I don't like the fact that people have been spreading shit that is not true. I'm not going to be considered a slut when I'm not. I have been nothing but nice to people. I'm not talking about Just Shizzle but these other guys that have said that I was trying to get with them and all that shit, But any way hopefully you all have fun and do whatever you all think is right and I'm so agravated but have a fun and great life and to those that are truely my friends I'm happy that you all have been her for me. Trista

50 Things She Wishes You Knew
Universal truths that all men should--but don't--understand 1. Saying "I love you" immediately before, during, or following sex doesn't count. 2. Real men drive stick shift. 3. I will leave if you lie. 4. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts). 5. I'm convinced I'm pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so. 6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear. 7. "Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look. 8. Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you. 9. I'm terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her. 10. I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you. 11. I expect you to call me. 12. Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants. 13. I'm scared of losing my independence. 14. I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be. 15. Oral sex is your get-o

Things Are Looking Up.
Things are looking a bit up i got my tax return, im going to buy a car, im excited, i got my tax return, i went and bought my lil sister some stuff im gonna mail to her, im gonna go buy her a card for build a bear :) for her birthday i think she'll like ethat quite well im gonna try and come in for her birthday, its may sixth, im not reallyl sure if i can make it in for amber and nicks wedding too, which would mean ill miss brandons graduation, but i dont think i could forgive myself if i miss my little sisters 4th birthday or any, i wont allow myself to. Or try to justify missing it, because im not going to. Anyways the car should help out. Yay!. HIGH FIVE FOR ME!

Thinking About Art...
(Originally Posted on April 21, 2006)Here is a picture of some artwork:And here's what it is: The Contraband series is a collection of sculptures made out of items whose possession, sale, use, and/or transportation across state or international borders is illegal. Each object is encased in a plastic bottle with a label identifying the contents. The bottles are then sealed with red shrink wrap. The series includes the following items: Methamphetamine Precursors (ephedrine and red phosphorus) 1 Marijuana Cigarette Human Remains Lock Picking Tools 1 Crocodile Skin Watchband Hallucinogenic Mushroom Spores 6 12 Gauge Shotgun Shells Telephone Wiretap Equipment Drug Paraphernalia 5 Cuban Cigars 2 oz. Homemade Liquor 1 Switchblade Knife 1 Police Badge Cheetah Fur Counterfeit Merchandise (Louis Vuitton scarf) Elephant Ivory Class C Firewo

Thinking Thoughts I Shouldn't!!
I was just sitting here wondering if anyone could tell me how the thought of being with someone you really want to be with can be so exciting and yet so confusing at the same time! I just recently got out of a bad marriage and I guess there are a lot of things I miss about being with someone. the confussing part is trying to figure out if this person likes me or not and do I really want to go there. The exciting part is I think about wanting to see this person all the time. This person can make me laugh even if I feel like all I want to do is crawl under a rock.I can tell this person anything and feel comfortable that it isn't going anywhere I don't want it to go! I guess what I'm saying is that I have a wonderful thing with this person and if I go with what I'm thinking about, I might ruin all of that. But on the other had, the what if's are driving me out of my mind!!!I think sometimes this person has a crystal ball and can tell me things about myself I don't want to know.Maybe it wo

Things My Mother Taught Me
Things my mother taught me 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE . "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" 4. My mother taught me LOGIC " Because I said so, that's why." 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." 7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!" 10

Thinking Of You
When I think of you I imagine your tender touch, When I think of you I can feel your lips touching mine. When I think of you I can here your smile playing with the win. I got you under my skin, you’re the air that I brief, and you live in my dreams. When I look at the star I can see you eyes looking back at me. When the night’s falls and I lay down in my bed I feel you warm body beside me Think of you is love you.

Things To Note In Life...
1. It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, But what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel. 2. A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who means a lot to you, only to find out in the end that it was never meant to be and you just have to let go. 3. The best kind of friend is the kind you can sit on a porch swing with, never say a word, and then walk away feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had. 4. It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. 5. It takes only a minute to get a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone- but it takes a lifetime to forget someone. 6. Don't go for looks; they can deceive. Don't go for wealth; even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile because it takes only a smile to make a dark day seem bright. 7. Dream

Think On These Things For Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Hence, will is given to man as he comes into this manifested form that we see in material forces, for the choice. Edgar Cayce Reading 262-52 Custom Comments, Layouts & more † Dark Angel Designz †

Things I Love.
1. Pookey. 2. My kids. Even though they can be a PITA. 3. Milo. 4. Youssarian. 5. Snuggling. 6. Singing when no one can hear me. 7. My camera - it never leaves my side. Ever. 8. Soft touches on the palms of my hands. Instant Kitten-puddle. 9. Getting mail that isn't a bill. 10. Surprise phone calls. 11. Stargazer lilies. Any lilies really, but specifically stargazers. 12. Black and white cow things. 13. Easter peeps. Not the eating kind though. The stuffed toy kind. 14. The little bitty squeaky sound the baby guinea pigs make when they snuggle. 15. Compliments. About anything. 16. Michael Buble. *swoons* 17. Peanut butter. If you know me, you already knew this. 18. Black thigh high stockings and high heels. 19. When my hair cooperates. 20. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The tv show, but the movie isn't bad either. 21. Vodka and cranberry. Vodka and Coke. Vodka and vodka. You get the picture. 22. cuteoverload.com

The Things You Never Wanted To Know...
Personal My name is: Pamela a.k.a. Angel, DA, Dark Angel, or Bitch I answer to all of them. My place of birth: Denver, CO. My date of birth: June 25 My age: 24 My marital status: Married to Satan.  My astrological sign: Cancer My profession: Answering stupid survey questions much like these. My education: Some college. My height: 5’3 & 1/2 “ My weight: ha ha ha like ima tell you right? not so much

Things I Don't Like.
I know I did a "things I love" entry - now it's time for things I don't like. 1. Pushy people. If I don't accept your friend request, don't send them over and over again. Pushy person, meet my block list. 2. Cats. It's not really that I don't like them, it's more like they terrify me. 3. Balloons, fireworks, anything that can make a loud sudden noise. I startle VERY easily. 4. Tomatoes. They creep me out. 5. Too much stuff on my sammiches. If I had wanted a salad, I'd have ordered one. 6. Having my hair touched. I'm getting better about it, but it gives me the heebie jeebies. 7. Chocolate. Yes, I know I'm weird. I'm sure there's more to add, but that's all I can think of now, LOL.

25 Things That Should Be In A Mans Vocab
25 THINGS THAT SHOULD BE IN A MAN’S VOCAB 1) I love you 2) I just called to hear your voice. 3) Is there anything I can do to make things better? 4) You look nice today. 5) Did you lose some weight? 6) You complete me. 7) I missed you. 8) No matter what happens, we will get through this together. 9) Our kids just don’t know how lucky they are to have you as a mother. 10 Enjoy your night out with the girls. 11) I’m sorry. 12) You did a good job. 13) I need you. 14) If that’s what you really want to do, I’m behind you all the way. 15) I’m proud of you. 16) Let’s go out tonight. 17) God must have spent a little more time on you. 18) Whenever you’re frustrated, depressed, confused or feeling that the whole world is closing in on you, remember that I’m here for you. 19) I’ll take the kids with me; you need a break. 20) You were right; I was wrong.

Think Before You Get A Cute Little Bunny...
Easter Bunny ~ In memory of all the bunnies I couldn't save. I remember Easter Sunday It was colorful and fun The new life that I'd begun In my new cage. I was just a little thing When they brought me from the store And they put me on the floor In my cage. They would take me out to play Love and pet me all the time Then at day's end I would climb In my cage. But as days and weeks went by I saw less of them it seemed Of their loving touch I dreamed In my cage. In the night outside their house I felt sad and so neglected Often scared and unprotected In my cage. In the dry or rainy weather Sometimes hotter sometimes colder I just sat there growing older In my cage. The cat and dog raced by me Playing with each other only While I sat there feeling lonely In my cage. Upon the fresh green grass Children skipped and laughed all day I could only watch them play From my cage. They used to take me out And let me scamper in the sun I no longer get to run In m

Things Are Starting To Fall Into Place.. Well Sorta
I'm now an official supervisor at the porn store..YES! lol i know it sounds weird but it's cool. I go get more shading done on my tat on thursday super excited about that.. I know that i dont know many chicks with full back pieces so i think i'm pretty hardcore lol jk.. I guess it's the whole go big or go home thing. I got my trampstamp and it was my first tattoo that doesnt really mean all that much but i was 18 so i got it done.. anyways.. i need to get the ball rolling as far as school goes. but i feel like an idiot and have no idea what to do at this point. GCC was like an extension of high school. It is relatively small and easy to figure out how to get all your classes situated but now that i have to go to a university... yikes..scary. I know that taking a semester off has made me a little lazy so i can't even imagine how those people feel who decide to wait a year or more til they go back to school. I just want to get my degree done

Thinking Of You
Sitting here thinking about you today, wishing that you weren't so far away. A frindship that was created all so soon, is really starting to bud and bloom. ~ You bring a smile to my face each day, awith the little messages you send my way. I hope in the years soon to come, that our frindship will shine like the sun. ~ We share a special kind of love, blessed by that of the Lord above. Forever friends we will stay, never allowing our bond to fray. ~ In my heart you will always stay, as I cherish our frindship everyday. Take my hand my dear friend, and friends we will remain to the end. ~ I will lift you up when your feeling down, giving you a smile to replace that frown. Just as I know you would do for me, without friends where would we be.

40 Things You Did Not Know
40 Things Your Might Not Know SurveyTAKE THIS SURVEY!Answer the questions below1. What color is your underwear right now?Baby blue2. What are you listening to right now?the buttons on the keyboard3. what are the last 2 digits in your phone number?284. What was the last thing you ate?a bagel and cream cheese5. If you were a crayon what color would you be?red6. How is the weather right now?cold7. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?my grama8. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?teeth9. Favorite type of Food?pizza10. Do you drink?yes11. Do you smoke?no12. Ever get so drunk you dont remember?yes13.What color are your eyes?hazel mostly green 15. Do you wear contacts?no16. Single?no17. Favorite Month?Febuary18. Ever cried for no reason?yes19. Last Movie you watched?Charlotts web20. Favorite day of the week?friday21. Are you too shy to ask someone out?yes22. Hugs or Kisses?hugs23. Chocolate or Vanilla?Chocolate24. Do you want your friends to respond?yes25. Who is

Things I Love About You
I love the softness in your eyes, How it opens the window to your heart, I feel so safe with you, And letting down my guard, I love the way your smile lights my life, Even the days I just wish would end, I see your smile, And I can find the strength again, I love your touch so tender, The way you feel next t o me, How it feels so good to surrender, And gain everything, I love your soft lips, And caressing them with mine, No matter how many times I kiss you, it always feels like the first time, I love your love for the lord, How you're not afraid to show your faith, One of the most beautiful things about you, Is seeing Heaven in your shining face, I love hearing you say my name, How it sends chills through me, And in a millions words, I couldn't say what you do to me. I love your love for life, How you pick yourself up when life holds you down, You always take the worst in things, And find a way to turn it around, I love your compassionate heart

Things You Remember
i was just setting here and the song im leaving on a jet plane just came on by john denver . that was the last song i herd in canada the first time i went on a tore over seas to chad africa . i remember sitting in a church with my friends for the last survice before departure .and that song came on , that song holds a lot for me i guess we all have things that take us back to happier times .

The Thing About Guys On Here..
is the lack of respect you give us women on here.Now I understand that there are some pretty under handed women on here too.The thing about it is this when you come across a good chick I mean she has looks,brains,sex appeal,her own money,and personality too boot.And what do you do?You say all the right things you know the things she wants to hear.Whether the words are in a sexual manner or just friendly chit chat.And then when we go and message you or even instant message you you guys ignore us as though we never have spoken to each other before.is that your guys definition of friendship? If so I really don't feel sorry for myself but for those of you that do.It's sad and pathetic and to hear you spew out what we already know are lies to begin with.I have said it before and i will say it again...Wouldn't it be easier if you just told us the way it is?

Think On This ...
There is the necessity that the physical body be in as perfect accord with the Creative and Universal Forces as is possible, but "Thy will be done in me as Thou seest I have need of in the present. Let me bear in my body those conditions, circumstances, physical and mental, that will bring me wholly closer to an understanding of the purposes for which I came into being; without censure to anyone, without censure to myself, but use me as Thou seest fit!" Edgar Cayce Reading 5640-3

Things Unsaid
Things Unsaid I am writing you this poem because There are so many things that I haven’t said I just don’t know how to tell you But the words keep floating through my head. My whole life is a mess right now All I can think about is you I don’t sleep, I don’t eat anymore And I discovered feelings that are so new. I want to hear your voice Every minute of the day I just don’t have the guts to call you Afraid of what you might say. Maybe you don’t feel the same Or maybe you do I am just scared to tell my feelings Even if it is to you. I wish I knew how to tell you I really want to say: I love you with all of my heart Forever and a day.

~think Think Think~
Read Each One Carefully & Think About It a Second or Two 1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.. 2. No man or woman is worth your tears, & the one who is, won't make you cry. 3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. 4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand & touches your heart. 5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can' t have them 6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile. 7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world. 8. Don't waste your time on someone, who isn't willing to waste their time on you. 9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful. 10. Don't cry because it is over, sm

10 Things
ONE there is NO SUCH THING as a CherryTap tracker. it does NOT exist. so quit posting stupid bulletins like "OH-MY-GOD this WORKS!!!" no, it doesnt. TWO To the people who have like 100,000 friends, are you serious? You're stupid. Go play in traffic. THREE Don't ever post pictures and say "OMG, I'm so ugly" "OMG, I'm so fat" because if you were, you wouldn't post them. And if u do ur a freaking mongoloid. FOUR Nobody cares about threats over the internet. Don't try to act hardcore with the keyboard. Fighting online is like racing in the special olympics; even if you win, you're still retarded. FIVE Quit crying b/c you're not on someones top 8. who cares? ITS CherryTap SIX Who really cares if I don't accept you as a friend? MOVE ON!!! Don't send me another request or message asking "what's up with you not adding me?" I don't want you as a friend, that's what's up frui

Thin Out The Herd...
This guy should be up for the Darwin award! Subject: Stun Gun If you don't laugh at least once while reading this there is something wrong with you STUN GUN (Only a guy would do this!) Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this : Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized taser. The effects of the taser were supposed to be short lived, with no long-term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety.... WAY TOO COOL! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home. I loaded two triple-a batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button AND pressed it aga

Things You Were Dying To Know...
1. A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why. 2. In the 1940s, the FCC assigned television's Channel 1 to mobile services (two-way radios in taxicabs, for instance) but did not re-number the other channel assignments. That is why your TV set has channels 2 and up, but no channel 1. 3. The "save" icon on Microsoft Word shows a floppy disk, with the shutter on backwards. 4. The combination "ough" can be pronounced in nine different ways. The following sentence contains them all: "A rough-coated, dough-faced, thoughtful ploughman strode through the streets of Scarborough; after falling into a slough, he coughed and hiccoughed." 5. The verb "cleave" is the only English word with two synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate. 6. The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable. 7. Facetious and abstemious contain all the vowels in the correct order, as does arsenious, meaning "contain

22 Things I Like This One
1 . Tell her she is beautiful (not fine, or sexy) 2 . Hold her hand at any moment . . . even if its just for a second. 3 . Kiss her on the forehead. 4 . Leave her voice messages to wake up to. 5 . When she is upset, hold her tight and tell her how much she means to you. 6 . Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most. 7 . Pick her over all the other girls you hang out with. 8 . Write her notes. (she loves them) 9 . Introduce her to family and friends . . . as your girlfriend. 10 . Play with her hair. 11 . Pick her up, tickle her, and play-wrestle with her. 12 . Sit in the park and just talk to her. 13 . Tell her funny jokes, tell her stupid jokes, or just tell her jokes. 14 . Let her fall asleep in your arms. 15 . If she's mad at you, kiss her. 16 . Give her piggyback rides. 17 . Bring her flowers 18 . Treat her the same around your friends as you do when your alone. 19 . Look her in the eyes and smile. 20 . Let h

Things U Never Thought To Ask...
1. The phone rings. Who do you want it to be? someone i want to talk to 2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart? always 3. If you had to kiss the last person you kissed, would you? i don't even remember the last person i kissed, its been awhile 4.Do you take compliments well? sometimes yes, sometimes no... they take me by surprise so i don't know how to take them sometimes 5. Do you play Sudoku? nope 6. If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive? i would attempt to 7. Do you like nipple rings? yes... some ppl can pull them off better than others tho 8. Did you ever go to camp as a kid? sure did 9. What was your favorite game as a kid? soccer, baseball, basketball, dress-up, or just sitting around daydreaming 10. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was married what would you do? i'd be flattered 12. Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you? i'd probably give it a shot

Things You Find Out When You Have Sons...
1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep. 2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite. 3. A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant. 4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room. 5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way. 6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan. 7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late. 8. Brake fluid mixed wi

Things I've Learned..
I've learned that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change. I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they are going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that. I've learned that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. The same goes for true love. I've learned that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life. I've learned that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be. I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them. I've learned that you can keep going long after you can't. I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. I've learned that either you control your attitude or it controls you. I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there had better be something else to take its

Think Im Perfect????no Im Not!!!
im not a perfect girl..my hair doesnt always stay in place and i spill things alot,Im pretty clumsy and some times i have a broken heart.My frenz and i sometymes fight or row.Mayb some days nothing goes right,bt wen i tink about it and take a step back i remember how amazin life truely is and that maybe just maybe i like being UNPERFECT!!!!!!!!.....

Think Of Me
think of me on a hot summer night when sweat glistens on your skin and every movement you make is slow cat-like i will come to you in your dreams your white-hot angel with golden hair midnight trance we dance the dream dance heat rising in a cresendo of passion every pore screaming for consumation melting blazing in a hot bed of desire when you lie in your bed alone restless think of me dream the hot white dream i will be there

25 Things You Should Know By The Time You Reach Middle Age...
>> 1. If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out. >> 2. Don't worry about what people think, they don't do it very often. >> 3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than >> standing in a garage makes you a car. >> 4. It ain't the jeans that make your butt look fat. >> 5. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity. >> 6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. >> 7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious. >> 8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission. >> 9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government >> program. >> 10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip. >> 11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. >> 12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so >> good. >> 13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway. >> 14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal w

Things Dumbasses Do On Cherrytap - Not Myspace!
Things Dumbasses Do On CherryTap - Not Myspace! One: Put so much crap on their profile that it is difficult to read, rate, or comment, and sometimes just crashes browsers and/or computers all together. It's called a stash, you get points for it, use it! Two: Throwing a giant fit and leaving. That's so middle school. Three: Having "rate me" and such in your username. Well, duh, it's CherryTap. Rating is what we do! But I bet no one would have thought of it if you had not reminded them! Four: Put private pictures in the middle of public folders. Your viewers can SEE the thumbnail, but we click on it and it says, "Sorry, this is private!" and you're stuck going back to the original gallery. I personally just close it and find someone else to rate. Five: Post/Repost bulletins that say, "Repost this or get off my friends list!". Fucking hell. I delete everyone who post those, even friends I talk to on a regular basis. I'm not here to be threatened! I accept just about ev

Things You Never Knew Your Cell Phone Could Do.
THINGS YOU NEVER KNEW YOUR CELL PHONE COULD DO. There are a few things that can be done in times of grave emergencies. Your mobile phone can actually be a lifesaver or an emergency tool for survival. Check out the things that you can do with it: FIRST Subject: Emergency The Emergency Number worldwide for Mobile is 112. If you find yourself out of the coverage area of your mobile; network and there is an emergency, dial 112 and the mobile will search any existing network to establish the emergency number for you, and interestingly this number 112 can be dialed even if the keypad is locked. Try it out. SECOND Subject: Have you locked your keys in the car? Does your car have remote keyless entry? This may come in handy someday. Good reason to own a cell phone: If you lock your keys in the car and the spare keys are at home, call someone at home on their cell phone from your cell phone. Hold your cell phone about a foot from your car door

60 Things Girls Never Knew About Guys
Heres 60 things gurls never knew about guys , i hate to admit it but alot of its true , and for those of you who know me and what i am about you will understand 1. Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 5 guys..you're a HOE) 2. "Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone. 3... Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about. 4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes. 5. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. 6. Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him. 7. Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-real

258 Things To Do When You Are Bored!
258 Things to do When You are Bored Wax the ceiling. Loosen the lug nuts on your dad's new car. Drop your cat from a high place, to see if it really does land on all four feet. Repeat above until failure. Rearrange political campaign signs. Sharpen your teeth. Play Houdini with one of your siblings. Braid your dogs hair. Clean and polish your belly button. Water your dog...see if he grows. Wash a tree. Genuflect to Lawrence Welk. Knight yourself and some close friends. Found the Jim Jones' School of Modern Bartending. Flirt with an evergreen. Scare Steven King. Give your cat a mohawk. Purr. Mow your carpet. Rake your carpet (to clean up the clippings.) Whine Play Pat Boone records backwards. Re-elect Richard Nixon. Dress like your favorite Heavy Metal group...surprise your grandmother. Listen to a painting. Play with matches. Buff your cat. Raise professional racing ferrets. Paint your home...day-glo orange. Dial-a-Prayer and argue. Read Homer in the original Greek. Learn Greek. Chang

Things I Want To Know About You.
Things I want to know about you. Body: YOU'RE ON MY FRIENDS LIST, I WANNA KNOW YOU...I want to know 44 things about you. . Short and sweet is fine...You're on my list, so I wanna know you better! =) JUST HIT REPLY TO SEND DIRECTLY TO ME IN A MESSAGE THEN, REPOST THE EMPTY QUESTIONS AS A BULLETIN. 1. What is your full name? 2. When is your Birthday? 3. What is your e-mail address? 4. Do you smoke? 5.How many sexual partners have you had? 6. If you can't answer, is it really that many? 7. Can you cook? 8. What was your dream growing up? 9. What talent do you wish you had? 10. Favorite place? 11. G-strings or thongs? 12. What was the last book you read? 13. What zodiac sign are u ? 14. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? 15. Worst Habit? 16. How do we know each other? 17. What is your favorite sport? 18. Pesimist or Optimist attitude? 19. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me

Thing That Are Difficult To Say When You're Drunk..
Things that are difficult to say when you're drunk... a) Innovative B) Preliminary C) Proliferation D) Cinnamon Things that are VERY difficult To say when you're drunk... a) Specificity B) British Constitution C) Passive-aggressive disorder D) Transubstantiate Things that are Absolutely Impossible to say when you're drunk... a) Thanks, but I don't want to sleep with you. B) Nope, no more booze for me. C) Sorry, but you're not really my type. D) No kebab for me, thank you. E) Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight? F) I'm not interested in fighting you. G) Oh, I just couldn't - no one wants to hear me sing. H) Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no Co-ordination. I'd hate to look like a fool. I) Where is the nearest toilet? I refuse to vomit in the street. J) I must be going home now as I have work in the morning.

Think On This ...
"For all that ye may ever keep is just what you give away, and that you give away is advice, counsel, manner of life you live yourself." The manner in which you treat your fellow man, your patience, your brotherly love, your kindness, your gentleness. That you give away, that is all that ye may possess in those other realms of consciousness. Edgar Cayce Reading 5259-1 commentburner.com

50 Things A Girl Does Wrong During Sex!
1. Assuming he can get a raging hard on when it suits you. Contrary to popular belief, men can't just flip a switch and get it up because you decided to stop being a frigid bitch. Getting it hard is your job. I suggest you figure it out. 2. Thinking that kissing needs to be this sweet romantic thing all the time. Sometimes pressing your lips against your partners mouth while you get off is the hot. It depends on the situation. 3. Leaving him responsible for your orgasm. You know what gets you off. Tell him. If you don't, it's your own fault when he's snoozing and you're all wound up. 4. Expecting him to cuddle. Men and women are wired differently. Sex makes most women want to talk and bond and all that shit. It makes men pass out. It's a biological thing. Stop fighting it, and stop holding it over his head, it's not his fault. 5. Expecting him to fall asleep with you in his arms. That shit is uncomfortable after awhile. A little snuggling isn't unreasonable, but when it'

25 Things My Mother Taught Me!!
1. TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why." 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." 7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!" 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all

Things R Lookin Better
well i moved here to kansas from missouri n jan wasnt diggin it at all...but now ive gotten a job 2 take up all that borin free time...plus have met chick that moved here same time i did but from florida...we have been kickin it n ive been enjoyin the time spent wit my family...n now im goin 2 b gettin a car next mth so i can go visit wit my best friend back home(she girl n pics wit holey jeans)n all my other peeps that r back home that i miss kickin it wit...so yea thhings r gettin better n it helpin change my additude bout liven here....

Things Most Girls Don't Know..
Yea theres many things we wish guys knew...but on the other hand theres alot out there that we don't know about them or just haven't actually believed yet.....read this it will make you think!!! Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 5 guys..you're a HOE) --"Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone. --Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about. --Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes. --Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. --Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him. --Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the let-her-complain-to-y

Things I Hate
1 i hate mornings so getting up befor the sun comes out sucks 2 always moven it seems when you find some were you like to be they up and move you 3 spouses that think the know how the army works when realy there full of it 4 new soldiers that think the army owes them something when it realy they need to get some ime under there belts before they should want any thing 5 the pay under payed is what we are we make about 2.00 an hour is you figure it the army says your a soldier 24/7 so your on the clock 24/7

50 Things Girls Wished Guys Knew..
1)You have to tell a girl how you feel about her...we make no assumptions. 2)It never hurts to work out...take your own advice. 3)Girls like sex just as much, if not more than guys. 4)Not all girls masturbate...we just don't and no we are not lying. 5)We hate porn. (kinda) 6)Hmmmm...guys in Jeeps...yummmm... 7)Girls need food, water, and compliments to survive. 8)We think about you all the time. 9)Being able to make us laugh is so much more important than how much you can bench-press. 10)We may think you are gay if you wear tighty-whities on a regular basis. 11)Hold our hand. 12)No backseat drivers...NONE. 13)Girls generally don't like giving head, so you better be ready to reciprocate if and when you get it. 14)We are not your all-night restaurant. 15)Anything we say or do during that 4 days to a week each month cannot be held against us. 16)If you hold our hand while you are driving we will be thoroughly impressed...especially if it's a stick. 17)Under no circumstance

Think On This ...
For mind is the builder and that which we think upon may become crimes or miracles. For thoughts are things and as their currents run through the environs of an entity's experience these become barriers or steppingstones, dependent upon the manner in which these are laid as it were. For as the mental dwells upon these thoughts, so does it give strength, power to things that do not appear. And thus does indeed there become that as is so oft given, that faith is the evidence of things not seen. Edgar Cayce Reading 906-3 Christian MySpace Graphics

Things That Make You Want To Go Hm-m-m-m-m
Things that make you want to go Hm-m-m-m-m Here are a few things to think about while you are relaxing... Most of you will just LOVE the last one! Can you cry under water? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? What disease did cured ham actually have? How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV? Why do people pay

99 Things Queen Of Darkness Requires From You
99 things Queen of Darkness requires from you 99. Damn….just let me own your heart and soul forever 98.Buying me house 97. Giving me a car 96.Spoiling me 95.Gifts 94.Public sex 93.Raw sex (Mating like two wild animals) 92.Kinky sex 91. Hot and intense passion 90.Give me all my heart desire from you 89.Honor among my realm of darkness 88.Stealing not allowed 87.Beating is not allowed…unless am using damn whip on your sorry ass 86.Stalking is mine too do 85.NO church 84. My rules, my way, or damn highway of death 83.Am always right….you are never right 82.Shower for more than two 81.Games 80.Toys are must 79.Kissing (please use tongue) 78.No selfishness allowed 77.No greed allowed 76.No haters allowed 75.Must be wicked 74.Talking back to me 73. Thinking for self is not allowed…..gets you kicked out 72.Drop to your knees and worship me 71.You are replaceable 70.Never think you mean something to me 69.Don’t ask me if cared about you 68.Give me the world

Things That Make Me Smile
Picking up a Great Friend at the Airport....... Showing up at a motel, and having your Non-Smoking Room not available.....Going to a new motel, unpacking and leaving so quickly, you don't even know the address.......Leaving a Jolly Roger at Bubba Gump's.........Driving aimlessly around San Francisco looking for your motel that you don't know where you left it........Sharing a bottle of wine with a Great Friend.......Leaving a Jolly Roger at the Motel..... Giving a neck and shoulder massage....... Going to the Golden Gate Bridge and walking it....... Leaving a Jolly Roger on the GG Bridge....... Going wine tasting with your Great Friend in Napa Valley and leaving a Jolly Roger....... Driving around SF looking for your motel........ Sharing a nice lunch/snack with your Great Friend....... Going to a professional baseball game, wondering why there are no cars in the parking lot and looking at your tickets and realize it was a day game, NOT a Night game..... Going to a Karaoke bar and list

Things To Ponder
FUNNY!!! Here are a few things to think about: Can you cry under water? Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why does a round pizza come in a square box? --------------------------------------------------------------------

Things That I Have Been Thinking
For once today I have decided to just stay in bed as long as I possibly could. Ok, that was until my husband woke me up when he got home (my guess was around 10:30 this morning.) from work, and before you ask WHY I was still in bed at that time, I didn't go to bed until probably close to three this morning. I normally don't fall asleep as easy as my husband does, and I have always had this going on, so don't think anything. Just ask my parents. I am more of a night owl my dad says. But leave it to my husband to fall asleep sitting on the couch watching t.v. . But after my husband let me know he was home, he went back into the living room and I knew it was cold outside since my arms got cold so I was back under the covers with the electric blanket on. Then my cell phone rang and it was my best friend Bill, calling. So I stayed on the phone with him for a couple of minutes since he was on the way to his mom's. Who would have guessed he would call again an hour later. :) I will add mo

Things You Might Want To Know About Me
80 Things You Might Not Know About Me Middle name? John How big is your bed? way to small What are you listening to right now? the TV What are the last 3 digits in your cellphone number?xxx What was the last thing you ate?2 triple stackers from BK, 10 piece tenders, and their cheesy tots. Last person you hugged?carrie How is the weather right now?COLD! Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? cant remember What is the first thing u notice in the opposite sex? boobs Favorite type of Food? edible Do you want children?yes Ever been so drunk you don't remember the entire night? YES Hair color? Blonde Eye color? Hazel Do you wear contacts/glasses?yes Favorite holiday? sleeping day Have you ever cried over a girl/boy? i admit i have Last Movie you Watched? ummmm borne idenity? What books are you reading? none Piercings? i miss them Favorite movie? pornos Favorite college football Team?Rutger

Things To Think About When Talking To Me.....
When you talk to me please dont let the first things that you say is when am i gonna let you see my private pics...My private pics are not what people think they are...I do not do nudes for people at all...My private pics are not of my naked body...They are just some pics of me that i rather not show 1 million+ people on the internet..if i choose to share them with you i will but if i dont its because you are pushy and thats all that is on your mind thinking that your gonna see nudes in my private folder...Nope aint happening at all... Also the word RESPECT means a hellva lot to me and if you dont know the definition then i think you need to look it up and practice that..... I am not here to hook up with anyone, been there once and wont do it again...I try to say hi to everyone but if i forget when u leave me a comment..I am truly sorry...I try but i have so many things going on in my life right now that i leave this on and forget about it sometimes so i am not ignoring you j

Thinking...
What do you see when you look at me? I often wonder how much my eyes reveal. Do you know what I'm thinking? Without a whisper of a spoken word, can you tell? Look closer, can you see the hell my eyes have witnessed? Do they express the love I have to offer, or the knowledge I have gained through my life experiences. Would you see as much if I closed them...? I wonder...

The Things We Said Today
This was originally the idea of a friend of mine from Xanga. List 10 things you would like to say to someone, but know you never will.... Do not reveal to whom you would say these words. They can be real life or online people (living or dead). You can only say one thing to each person. No repeats.(Leave them in my comment section and feel free to repost elsewhere.) These are mine: 1. While I always knew how much you pushed me to grow as a person, I never fully realized just how much you held things together around us all. Now you're gone and things are truly a mess. I'm sure you're somewhere shaking your head and wondering if you taught us nothing. 2. For someone as smart as you are, I can't understand how you haven't figured out that love is blindness in the last 21 years. 3. Life can be a funny thing sometimes. It gives us people to enjoy and learn from and then takes them away with no notice and little compassion for the pain it causes us. There was so much more tha

A Thing I Got From My Friend Restrictive.
1. What bill do you hate paying the most? ALL 2. Where's the best place to eat a romantic dinner? At home where noone can bother us!! 3. Last time you puked from drinking? never have yet. 4. Have you ever got drunk and danced on a bar?yes,3 times. 5. Name of your first grade teacher? Don't remember. 6. What do you really want to be doing right now? being played with by a nice master. 7. What did you want to be when you were growing up? a vet. 8. How many colleges did you attend? 2 9. Why did you wear the shirt that you have on right now?because it was hot and it's white and fits me nicely!! 10. GAS PRICES! First thought? they suck!! 11. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you? to a place near a lake. 12. First thought when the alarm went off this morning? what the hell,to early. 13. Last thought before going to sleep last night?Wish someone was here to play with me. 14. Favorite style of underwear? none. 15. Favorite style of underw

Think On These Things For Tuesday, April 17, 2007t
More individuals become so anxious about their own troubles, and yet helping others is the best way to rid yourself of your own troubles. For what is the pattern? He gave up Heaven and entered physical being that ye might have access to the Father. Edgar Cayce Reading 5081-1 Sexy & Romantic glitter graphics from Sexi Luv.com

25 Things To Know
You're on my friends list. I'd like to know 25 things about you. Just hit reply to sender. Thanks! You'll be surprised how much you didn't know about your friends after this! 1. Ever punch someone in the face? 2. How old are you? 3. Are you single or taken? 4. Eat with your hands or utensils? 5. Do you dream at night? 6. Ever seen a corpse? 7. Have you ever wished someone dead? 8. Do You Like Bush, the president? HERE COMES THE EQUALLY INTERESTING PART... 9. Whats your philosophy on life and death? 10. If you could do anything with me, and have know one know, what would it be? 11. Do you trust the police? 12. Do you like country music? 13. What is your fondest memory of me? 14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be? 15. Would you date me? 16. What do you wear to sleep? 17. Have you ever peed in a pool? 18. Would you hide evidence for me if I asked you to? 19. If I only had one day to live, what wo

Things Arent Too Bad Concidering...
Thought i would let my friends know that all is going pretty good concidering. Kids are healthy, and happy. Mike and I broke up awhile back, and I still live here with him for another couple of months. Im waiting for my daughter to get out of school, and then they are going to their dads, and I will start packing, and move. I hope to be completly moved,and working by the end of June. I am moving back to the Joplin (Mo) area where I have friends and family. Hope all is well with my friends....MUWHAAAAAA ~~Amber

3 Things To Think About
Three things to think about 1. COWS 2. THE CONSTITUTION 3. THE TEN COMMANDMENTS 1. COWS: Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington? And, they can track her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow. 2. THE CONSTITUTION: They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it's worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore anyway. 3. THE TEN COMMANDMENTS: The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse.

Things That Kill Your Love Life
Excessive jealousy or possessiveness is the leading reason behind why people break up. If you are extremely possessive about your partner, you could be sabotaging your own love life. There are certain qualities that two people require to make a relationship work. They need to be compatible, understand each other, and share the same wavelength. Similarly, even when it comes to destroying a relationship, it is not always one person who is at fault. Sometimes, certain behavioural traits of a person can also destroy a relationship. Things like past demons, jealousy and lack of security can make people say or do things, which in turn affect the relationship in a very negative way and as a result, cause people to suffer. Just like it takes hard work to buid a relationship, certain things are a sure way to end one. The following are a few things that could lead your relationship in the wrong dirrection... The green-eyed monster Excessive jealousy or possessiveness is the leading reas

Things I Want To Know
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes BASICS: Name: Age: Location: Height: Hair (color and style): Eyes: Piercing/tattoos: OTHER: 1. Where would we go on dates? 2. Who are three of your favorite bands/artists? 3. Do you drink/smoke?? 4. Do you like the beach? 5. If so...would you go with me late at night? 6. Do you like movies? 7. If so would you stay up and watch them with me all night? 8. If you were to take me out to a movie would we watch the movie? 9. If not what would we be doing? 10. Do you play an instrument? 11. If so...what? 12. Would you want me to call you right after we saw each other to make sure I made it home alright? 13. How would you rate your hugs from 1-10? 14. Favorite body part on a woman? 15. What would you say is the best thing about yourself? 16. Do you have any reps (i.e.: heartbreaker, player, and slut)? 17. Would you give me kisses just because? What would you do if... I cried: I said I liked you: I kissed you: I touched you

Things Women Say That End New Relationships
Things Women Say That End New Relationships >Note: When you meet a great man and you both seem to fall for each other quickly, it's common to believe your relationship is "going somewhere". That is, until he lets you know he's NOT interested in a "serious relationship". If you don't know why most men think it's easier to "date" than be in a relationship with you, and you trigger a man's natural RESISTANCE when you try and talk to him about things... then do yourself a huge favor and read this: http://www.CatchHimAndKeepHim.com/e/12833/FCTC/ Dear Crystal, What's the hardest thing to do when you're first dating a man you really like? I'll give you a hint - it's NOT keeping his interest or attention. This one thing often means the difference between a great lasting relationship coming together... or a man wanting to leave. So, do you know what this one thing is? I'll tell you... It's having that first "talk" with a man abo

36 Things About Me
36 of the MOST Spontaneous Questions Ever, BE HONEST! 1. Where were you an hour ago? Same place I am now. Home. 2. Who will be your next kiss? Don’t know. Can’t predict the future. 3. Who is your favorite character from the Wizard of Oz? I’m not a fan of the Wizard of Oz at all but if I had to have a favorite I guess it’d be…..Toto. 4. Are you wearing socks right now? Nope. 5. When was the last time you went out of the state? Christmas 6. Have you been to the movies in the last 5 days? Yes. Went to see 300 yesterday. 7. What was the last thing you had to drink? Diet Coke 8. What are you wearing right now? Umm…Tank top and underwear. 9. What was your last purchase? Just a couple of things I needed at Wal-Mart. 10. Last food you ate? Leftovers from Olive Garden. Yum.. 11. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? My mom. 12. Have you bought any clothing items in the last month? Yes…went to the mall this past weekend. 13

Things I Love With A Passion
I rock and roll with passion I talk out my soul with a passion I eat good food with passion I defeat bad mood with a passion I sleep well with passion I weep hell with a passion I dream endlessly with passion I gleam ceaselessly with a passion I aim for money with passion I do the same for honey with a passion I listen carefully with passion I glisten dutifully with a passion I search for fame with passion I research to blame with a passion I walk everyday with passion I talk and play with a passion I embrace life with passion I face nightlife with a passion I laugh out with passion I chaffe about with a passion I cook with others with passion I look at mothers with a passion I touch gently with passion I clutch tightly with a passion I work hard with a passion I rock mad with a passion I gear up goals with passion I stir up roles with a passion I make friends with passion I take weekends with a passion I love kissing with pas

Thinking...
Good Morning and how is Thursday in your neck of the world? Mine it looks to be a sunny day, mid to upper 50’s and well that’s what the weathermen say anyway…so that means…well anyone’s guess I guess. I think, you know.. thinking…everyone does it… I think they do.. no I know they do. But, where do you think the most? Please if your going to say the nest… that is a given…But I, (No Butts to this one) I think my best thinking is while driving…I also do a lot while hunting. But, since I do not hunt as often as I used to I will have to say the majority of my thoughts are while driving, and while the theater of the mind is playing (the radio) Although some of the time the theater of the mind only has upsetting news.. I would rather not have all the hate and discontent news early or late in the day because it sometimes paves the way for the rest of your day on early and late is not good either as it’s the last thoughts before closing your eyes to sleep… see thinking… we all do it. Some more

Things To Think About
(Originally posted on March 13, 2007)Today I have been surfing the net a bit and would like to show some of the things I found.The first one is a sound file from The Onion about an interesting way to walk a dog.The second one is for a new religious school in the U.K. Personally, I wouldn't mind sending my kids to this schoolThe third one comes with the following picture and is found here. And finally, this morning while using StumbleUpon (NSFW), I found this profile (also NSFW) filled with all sorts of funny pictures.Enjoy!tag: satan, satanism, satanic, satanist, religion, links, web, stumbleupon, health, sperm-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-Ave Satanas!

5 Things Women .....
5 things she hates to hear... "You've really got a great body. Do you work out or something "Oh, I know all about that!" "So I've been shopping for a new BMW..." "Wanna come up to my place for a nightcap?" "I'll call you." ------------------------------------------ 5 things she'd love to hear... "You look amazing." "How was your day?" "I'm really having a great time with you." "What do you think about such-and-such topic?" "I'd love to see you again."

5 Things Men ....
5 Things Men Hate to Hear "My last boyfriend..." "Do you mind if I take this call?" "So how do you feel about abortion?" "And then I found this cute pair of sandals..." "How do you feel about having a family?" ----------------------------------------------- 5 Things a man loves to Hear "Then what happened?" "That's pretty impressive." "Thank you." "What do you do when you're not at work?" "I'd like to get your opinion on something."

Thinking Of You
When you read these words, chances are that I'll be sitting here thinking of you... as I so often do. I'll probably be smiling one of the smiles that I always do when thoughts of you come my way. When you read these few words, I hope you'll think, just for a moment, how much you mean to me and how much you always will. And when you continue on with the things you need to be doing in your day, smile a smile for me, and remember that I'll be thinking of you still.

"thinking Of You"
"Thinking of You" Misty rains softy fall - the tears sliding down my face. All I can think of is you - my heart is a cold empty place. Your words haunts me as the world around me turns. All this love for you silently grows and burns. I am the sensitive poet - I am the brightening noon. I wish and pray all the time that the hurt will leave soon. I am the moody sunset - glowing pale and bright. You are the hopeful sunrise - that never fades the night. The rose catched no tears - the thorns have no soul. My feelings are my thoughts that I have no control.

Think On These Things For Friday, April 20, 2007
Think on This ... Then all of these influences astrological (as known or called) from without, bear witness--or are as innate influences upon our activity, our sojourn through any given experience. Not because we were born with the sun in this sign or that, nor because Jupiter or Mercury or Saturn or Uranus or Mars was rising or setting, but rather: Because we were made for the purpose of being companions with Him, a little lower than the angels who behold His face ever yet as heirs, as joint heirs with Him who is the Savior, the Way, then we have brought these about because of our activities through our experiences in those realms! Hence they bear witness by being in certain positions--because of our activity, our sojourn in those environs, in relationships to the universal forces of activity. Hence they bear witness of certain urges in us, not beyond our will but controlled by our will! Edgar Cayce Reading 1567-2

Things You'd Love To Say Out Loud At Work
THINGS YOU'D LOVE TO SAY OUT LOUD AT WORK 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit. 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for you? 4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. 5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way. 6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter. 7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message. 8. I don't work here, I'm a consultant. 9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying. 10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again... 11. I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid. 12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers. 13. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn. 14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

Thinking About Last Night's Show
So, on last night's Dark Side, I think I probably did my best show to date. That's both good and bad. It's good insofar as I'm kicking the rust off this whole radio show thing. I'm getting my rythm back, which feels pretty good, since I was on hiatus from broadcasting for 3 or so years and the new show is run completely differently. It's bad, coz now I feel like the previous shows were totaly crap. Of course, I'm a self-critical punk, so who knows. Besides, it is just a small internet talk radio show. It's not like I put actual work into it. Oh, yeah, there is the 8-10 hours I prep for it during the previous week, but that's it. And it is a hobby, after all. Anyway, if you've never tuned in, please give it a shot. I promise to never have clowns on my show. Mimes, maybe, but not clowns. 2D

Things Yall Need To Explian To Me...
Well since i been on here i meet alot of different people from all over the place. N for the most part enjoyed it. But there r some things i just dont get. If yall can explian it to me good luck. Why does everyone wear thier hat crooked nowadays? Why does so many folks try n talk street even though thier whiter than mircale whip? Does anyone besides me wear a belt anymore? Whats the deal with so many folks shooting birds on thier pics? If thier pissed off at everyone why be on here? What the hell is it with people having foot fetishes on here? I think leggs r sexy, but you cant slap enough paint on a foot to make it sexy. Why did we have to do those stupid salutes? And why dont they be more careful bout letting minors on here? So thier ya go, something to ponder over. N if you know the answer to any of em, lemmie know too.....

Things I've Learned About Women
I've seen so much on the internet, from dating tips, to advice and even women themselves putting out their criteria for what makes a man appealing. At the same time I've met a lot of women in my life thus far. In addition I was married, it was horrible for the most part because the bad times seriously outnumbered the good. I've been divorced for over 6 years now, and I'm just throwing out what I've learned about women. I could be right, I could be wrong, these are just my observations. Please note when I say "some women" that does not imply "all women". I will not generalize every woman in the world, I'm smarter than that. So anyway here goes.... I've learned that some women regardless of what they say are completely vain and into looks, just like some men. I realize that my ex-wife and her behavior does not represent all women. I'm sure there are some beautiful women out there who see any relationship as a 50/50 venture and are not out to suck the living life out of

~things I Need~
*Things I need* 4/22/2007 1.A man, not a little boy to look after and take care of. 2.Someone who will take care of me even when they think I don’t need them. 3.Someone to love me unconditionally even after we have a disagreement. 4.The kind of guy that even after and argument will wrestle me into submission by having a tickle fight; even if it wasn’t his fault, just so he can see me smile. 5.The kind of guy who will make passionate love to me after tickling me into submission. 6.A guy who wants to make love to me for hours, not just fuck my brains out. 7.Don’t get me wrong it’s nice to have sex, but sometimes you just want intimacy. 8.A guy who will respect me. 9.Someone to grow old and spend the rest of my life with. 10.Someone to make me cry only tears of joy, but would never want to see or make me cry. 11.Someone who just wants to hold me. 12.A man that I can just lay and watch a movie with, even if it happens to be a sappy chick flick. 13.A man to run me a hot bath a

Things Are Confusing
sometimes things are so confusing what is right what is wrong do you turn and run or stay and take the chance sometimes the world is just on my shoulders w/no place to throw it no one cares to listen or try to understand so whats the difference so many people to please but whos there to please me no one ever oh well i guess thats just life

10 Things U Wont Hear A Man Say
10.take that hammer hit me in the head 09. honey bite my dick off 08.stick that needle in me 07. roast my nuts 06.pull my hair out by the roots 05.glue my sack to my leg 04.nail my tung to a wall 03.zap my balls 02. throw acid in my face 01.shove a sword up my ass

10 Things A Woman Wont Say
10.burn my clit 09.cutt my boobs off 08.wax me with grey tape 07.boss me around and hit me hard 06.do my sister 05.middle of sex"stop licking me" 04.fuck me over again 03.set my pussy on fire 02.shave me bald"whole" 01.call me cunt

20 Things To Do To Stay Sane
20 things to do to stay sane 1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In." 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso. 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds" 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy." 8. Don t use any punctuation 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go." 12. Sing Along At The Opera 13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical

Things Going On With Me
Just to let you know I wont be on very much cuz I have two jobs and that means long days and nights also the people I was living with their garage started on fire so I am staying with some other people right now and probably wont be online very much things with me are really crazy and its gettin late and I have to be up early so night night talk to you later

Thinking Of You
Hi OK :)..Send this heart for everyone you know that likes you, and if you are inside their hearts they will send it back to you!!! Let's see how many hearts you receive? You ... are in my heart as a valued friend!!! ´´´´¶¶¶¶¶¶´´´´´´¶¶¶¶¶¶ ´´¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶´´¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ´¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶´´´´¶¶¶¶ ¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶´´´´¶¶¶¶ ¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶´´¶¶¶¶¶ ¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ´¶¶¶¶¶ ´¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ´´´¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ´´´´´¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ´´´´´´´¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ´´´´´´´´´¶¶¶¶¶¶¶¶ ´´´´´´´´´´´¶¶¶¶ Please don't forget to send it back to me.. sending luv ur way ......THEY SAY iT TAKES A MiNUTE...... .......TO FiND A SPECiAL PERSON, ....... .....AN HOUR TO APPRECiATE THEM, ...... .........A DAY TO LOVE THEM, ........ ..........AN ENTiRE LiFE TiME......... ..............TO 4GET THEM............. .......SEND THiS TO THE PEOPLE...... .............U'LL NEVER 4GET.............. .........ITS A SHORT MESSAGE.......... ...........TO LET THEM KNOW............. ......TH

Thinking
You look back in life and you think where did you go wrong and wish you would have never fucked up but you did and you just wish you could die.You wonder why you ended up like you did and you wish you could change it but you can't.You wonder why ppl do what they do and why they treat you like they do and then you remember what went wrong.You just don't understand life at all but all you know is you have a purpose but you don't know what it is at all.You ask what it is but know one can answer.You pray and sometimes you wonder if there really is a god and then you do believe in him till he lets you down.Ppl you love die and ppl you love get hurt and you just wonder what the hell happened and still no answer.

45 Things All Girls Love... And Most Guys Dont Do
45 things all girls love... and most guys dont do 45 things all girls love 1-touch her waist 2-talk to her 3-share secrets 4-give her your jacket 5-kiss her slowly 6-hug her 7-hold her 8-laugh with her 9-invite her somewhere 10-LET HER BE WITH YOU WHEN YOU'RE WITH YOUR FRIENDS keep reading... 11-smile with her 12-take pics with her 13-pull her onto your lap 14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. fight back 15-when her friends say i love her more than you, deny it. fight back and hug her tight so she cant get to her friends. it makes her feel loved Are you thinking about someone? 16-always hug her and say i love you when you see her 17-kiss her unexpectedly 18-***HUG HER FROM BEHIND AROUND THE WAIST!!!***! 19-tell her shes beautiful not sexy! 20-tell her the way you feel about her! u need to show her you mean it too 21-kiss her on the lips 22-DON'T ask her to buy you stuff. you buy her stuff 23-TELL HER WHAT FEELS GOOD 2

80 Things You Might Not Have Known
80 Things You Might Not Know About Me Whats your middle name?Elizabeth How big is your bed?queen What are you listening to right now?AFI What are the last 4 digits in your cellphone number?5289 What was the last thing you ate?tacos Last person you hugged?Chris How is the weather right now?Hot Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?Neil What is the first thing u notice in the opposite sex?Eyes Favorite type of Food.Chinese Do you want children?Possibly Do you drink?Yes Ever get so drunk you don\'t remember the entire night?No Hair color?Brown for now Eye colour?Blue Do you wear contacts/glasses?Both Favorite holiday?Halloween Favorite Season?Fall Have you ever cried over a girl/boy?yes

Think On These Things For Tuesday, April 24, 2007
[Karmic conditions] can be met most in Him who, taking away the law of cause and effect by fulfilling the law, establishes the law of grace. Thus the needs for the entity to lean upon the arm of Him who is the law, and the truth and the light. Edgar Cayce Reading 2828-4

Thinking Again
Once again I have to blog. Seems like depression is here, when my baby goes to work all I do is sit and think. I was so afraid to let somebody in, now I am scared to death to lose my heart. I have a song on my myspace page done by Peter Roy Project, I go to my page constantly just to hear the song. I will share the words............ MD --- Peter Roy Project Never knew how much I could love when it was Till the first day that I saw you My whole world changed will never be the same Now that I have you Beauty has never has been as true as it is everytime I look at you Sometimes the world escapes me lost in our love who could blame me for loving you as much as I do for loving you as much as I do loving you as much as I do Never knew how much I could love when it was Till the first day that I saw you My whole world changed will never be the same Now that I have you Never knew how much I could love when it was Till the first day that I saw you My whole world changed will n

Things That Make Ya Go, Huh?!?
I was reading an article on the internet today about people who talk too much and how to recognize it. One of the things it said was that if you talked 60% of the time during the conversation, you talk too much. You should only talk 50% of the time, but 30 – 40% would be better. Now, if you only talk 30-40% of the time, wouldn’t that make the other person talk too much? I’m sure everyone has heard that the Governor of New Jersey is in the hospital from a car crash. He was not wearing a seatbelt, even though NJ law requires them. A person with the State Police there stated that the State Trooper driving the vehicle for the Governor should be commended for his driving ability, as the accident was not any worse. Personally, I think the trooper should be fired… 1. He did not make the Governor put his seatbelt on. You know he would have pulled any one of us over for the same thing. 2. He was driving 91 mph on wet roads. That would have got us pulled over also. Sure, he

Things People Cant Say When There Drunkkk
THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE DRUNK 1) Innovative 2) Preliminary 3) Proliferation 4) Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE -VERY- DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN YOU ARE DRUNK 1) Specificity 2) British Constitution 3) Passive-aggressive disorder 4) Transubstantiate Things that are ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE to say when you're drunk: 1) Thanks, but I don't want to sleep with you. 2) Nope, no more booze for me. 3) Sorry, but you're not really my type. 4) No kebab for me, thank you. 5) Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight? 6) I'm not interested in fighting you. 7) Oh, I just couldn't - no one wants to hear me sing. 8) Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no co- cordation. I'd hate to look a fool. 9) Where is the nearest toilet? I refuse to vomit in the street. 10) I must be going home now as I have work in the morning

Things On My Mind
Every element that exists in this universe is manifested through a thought first. These are my thoughts, my feelings. I feel like sharing some of the things on my mind, mostly about my poetry, but about a few other things too. Lets start with the poetry and see where this goes. My poetry is the only healthy release I have. I share it with the world via internet, not for sympathy, not for attention, not for advice. I share it because it is a way for me to say my feelings without having to say them out loud. I share them because I am proud of the fact that instead of just picking up a knife, I chose at least THAT time to use that energy elsewhere. I share it because I know some people can relate. I dont dare think I have the worst life in the world. Believe me, I know about the starving Ethiopians. But these are totally different struggles. They struggle to survive. I struggle to live. I have alot of issues inside that I let build to the point where the flood of chaos break

11 Things Losers Do On Myspace
ONE there is NO SUCH THING as a myspace tracker. it does NOT exist. so quit posting stupid bulletins like "OH-MY-GOD this WORKS!!!" no, it doesnt. TWO To the people who have like 25,000 friends, are you serious? You're stupid. Go play in traffic. THREE Don't ever post pictures and say "OMG, I'm so ugly" "OMG, I'm so fat" because if you were, you wouldn't post them. And if u do ur a freaking idiot.. FOUR NOBODY cares about threats over the internet. Don't try to act hardcore with the keyboard. FIGHTING ONLINE is like racing in the special olympics; even if you win, you're still RETARTED. FIVE Quit crying b/c you're not on someones top 8. who cares? ITS MYSPACE!!! not your space SIX Who really cares if I don't accept you as a friend? MOVE ON!!! Don't send me another request or message asking "what's up with you not adding me?" I don't want you as a friend, that's what's up fruit!!! SEVEN Little 6th graders who have MySpace and look like

30 Things Porn Directors Would Have Us Believe:
1. Women wear high heels to bed. 2. Men are never impotent. 3. When going down on a woman, ten seconds is more than satisfactory. 4. If a woman gets caught masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her. 5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm. 6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men. 7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob. 8. Women always orgasm when men do. 9. A blowjob will always get a women off a speeding fine. 10. All women are noisy fucks. 11. People in the 70's couldn't fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background. 12. Those tits are real. 13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt. 14. Men always groan "OH YEAH!" when they cum. 15. If there is two of them they "high five" each other (and the girl isn't disgusted). 16. Double penetration makes women

125 Things Not To Say Durring Sex
1)is it in? 2)that's it? 3)you've got to be kidding me. 4)(phone rings) hello? oh nothing and you? 5)do i have to pay for this? 6)do i have to call you tomorrow? 7)oh momma, momma! 8)oh dadda, dadda! 9)you look better in the dark. 10)this is much better than my last girl/boyfriend. 11)i thought that goes in the other hole.... 12)don't tell my husband/wife. 13)you have the same bra my mom does (worse if the girl says it). 14)this sucks. 15)can you finish now? i have a meeting... 16)i hope you don't expect a raise for this... 17)i think you might get the job for this. 18)damn! is that all you know what to do. 19)did i tell you, i have herpes? 20)now we must get married. 21) hurry up, the games about to start. 22)i'm hungry. 23)i'm thirsty. 24)zzzzzzzzzzzz. 25)are you trying to be funny? 26)can i have a ride home after this? 27)are those real? 28)by the way, i want to break up. 29)is that smell coming from you? 30)haven't you ever done this before? 31)wow!! i

Things I Have Done
1. My brother decided to throw my shoe in the grass, during the night, and would not help me find it. So I decided to take his matress off his bed and put it on the balcony. 2. my brother got on my nerves so I threw his shoe out the window...but I ended up having to get it. 3. I drew penises and LAO and the wor Penis fuck on my brother's door. 4. My one friend I hung out with in highschool always got called Avril Lavine, cause she dressed like her. So when we went ou in public I told these kids "OMG LOOK AVRIL LAVINE" and they was like is it really?? and got all excited I only did it cause I knew she hated it 5. I let off a stink bomb in the ladies bathroom and the mall and made some woman jump and yell Jesus Crist. 6. I put a bag of my own throw up on my brothers bed since he did not listen and take out the trash. 7. I sprayed paint a board dissing this bimbo loser chick who I hate. 8. I always left gym class i hs...and went home early ++++I did more let me t

The Thinking Of A Woman Compared To The Thinking Of A Man...
An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money. After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the president's office. The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, "$165,000". The president was curious and asked her how she had been able to save so much money. The elderly woman replied that she made bets. The president was surprised and asked, "What kind of bets?" The elderly woman replied, "Well, I bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square." The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that. The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and said, "Would you like to take my bet?"

Things I Never Knew Plz Read
You Might Not Ever Guess Captain Kangaroo passed away on January 23, 2004 as age 76 , which is odd, because he always looked to be 76. (DOB: 6/27/27 ) His death reminded me of the following story. Some people have been a bit offended that the actor, Lee Marvin, is buried in a grave alongside 3 and 4 star generals at Arlington National Cemetery . His marker gives his name, rank (PVT) and service (USMC). Nothing else. Here's a guy who was only a famous movie star who served his time, why the heck does he rate burial with these guys? Well, following is the amazing answer: I always liked Lee Marvin, but didn't know the extent of his Corps experiences. In a time when many Hollywood stars served their country in the armed forces often in rear echelon posts where they were carefully protected, only to be trotted out to perform for the cameras in war bond promotions, Lee Marvin was a genuine hero. He won the Navy Cross at Iwo Jima . There is only one

Things Im Not So Crazy About
1. Piercings. I dont understand why people want to go around looking like pin cushions, my ex had one of those steel pins in her tongue and it made a horribly irritating clicking sound against her teeth, also it made her breath smell bad, nasty stuff. 2. Tattoos. Nope, i dont understand tattoos either, especially those, um, ass tattoos, you know what im talking about, those patterns women have tattooed just above their asses, from a distance it looks like they have a bruise there or havent wiped properly, i dont get it. Look, one day we are all going to get old and boy are we going to look ridiculous on the beach, our bodies all withered and our tits sagging with skulls and daggers tattooed on our arms, we will probably have had our piercings removed by then because the tongue pin kept getting caugt on our false teeth..

Things That Ammuse Me
A conversation I had with someone and I we were talking about the various names you call a penis or a vagina. I mean ok the one term for a vagina is a box...that makes no sense..I mean it is more like oval like than a box.. And what the hell is a snatch?? It is like a mde up word. Like were the cave men sitting aroun and goign ajrwrhbtui humba shunan SNATCH and pointed to a vagina?? All right so the penis..I love the term rooster it is like kinda random, I see the meaning it derives from the word cock. Also back when you were knee high and you used to say DING DONG cause the way the penis moves haha ha ha I analyze too much But I mean who comes up with the names of people's crothes? HA HA HA HA. Also we were talking about how some guys leave some comments. Such As "mmmm" what the hell is mmmm as in like you are yummy or what??? Or are you having a cyber orgasm?? HA HA HA It kinda scares me some guys get a little too excited over pictures. I feel as if the picture should come with a bo

Things I Have Learned From Living In Southern Illinois...
>>Things I Have Learned From Living in Southern Illinois ..... > >1. Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air. > >2. There are 5,000 types of snakes on earth and 4,998 live in Southern >Illinois. > >3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Southern >Illinois >plus a couple no one's seen before. > >4. If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites. > >5. Onced and Twiced are words. > >6. It is not a shopping cart; it is a buggy. > >7. Houses have "Winders" and "Windas", never has a window been seen South >of I-70 > > >8. People actually grow and eat okra. > >9. "Fixinto" is one word. > >10. There is no such thing as "lunch." There is only dinner and then >there >is supper. > >11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when >you're two. > > > >12. Backards and forwards means "I know everything about you." > >13. DJeet? is actually a phrase meaning "Did you e

11 Things Ct Is Not Ment For
a friend of mine posted this and its so true haha if you dont like offensive words then dont read it This is hilarious and so true, I had to repost it. Sorry if some of it is offensive!! ONE. there is NO SUCH THING as a CT tracker. it does NOT exist. so quit posting stupid bulletins like "OH-MY-GOD this WORKS!!!" no, it doesnt. TWO. To the people who have like 25,000 friends, are you serious? You're stupid. Go play in traffic. THREE. Don't ever post pictures and say "OMG, I'm so ugly" because if you were, you wouldn't post them. And if u do ur a fucking moron. FOUR. NOBODY cares about threats over the internet. Don't try to act hardcore with the keyboard. FIGHTING ONLINE is like racing in the special olympics; even if you win, you're still retarded. FIVE. Quit crying b/c you're not on someones LIST. who cares? ITS CT!!! SIX. Who really cares if I don't accept you as a friend? MOVE ON!!! Don't send me another request or mess

Things Ive Learned From Internet Porn!!!
1. Every woman loves to have cum spewed on her face. No matter how much she says she doesnt, do it anyway, she will laugh about it afterwards. No repercussions. 2. Every woman loves anal. It doesnt matter how big your penis is, just shove it in there. No mater how much she says ow, stop, or get it out of there, just keep plugging away and she will have an orgasm sooner or later. 3. No need to go down on a woman. The sheer sight of seeing your penis will have her willing to be your total and complete slave in the bedroom. 4. Every guy is hung like an f'n donkey. If you arent...you are a freak. There must be somehting wrong with you. 5. Its is extremely easy to talk any woman into being with another woman. Every woman is bi-sexual. 6. You can talk a girl into fucking you or a friend immediately, no matter where you are or how goofy you or said friend look. 7. It doesnt matter if a woman has a boyfriend, husband, or kids for that matter. She will have sex

100 Things I Have/ Need To Do
top 100 things i havta do 1. go skydiving 2. get a tattoo 3. visit at least 5 foreign countries 4. take a train someplace 5. learn a new language 6. go backpacking around thailand 7. see the seven wonders of the world 8. adopt another armani 9. find my other half 10. have kids with my other half 11. become the chick version of the guy in blow lol 12. go parasailing 13. go horseback riding 14. Edward Norton (enuf sed) 15. be in the eye of a tornado 16. witness an exorcism 17. Faint 18. Own my own bussiness 19. Experience a hurricane 20. experience a major eathquake 21. have my entire back henna tattooed 22. get my tongue pierced again 23. find a way to stop needin my meds 24. Go to a psychologist so i can be properly diagnost 25. Have a past life regression 26. Trip on Acid 27. Write a book 100. go to the Bermuda Triangle and come back with a story to tell

Think Before You Speak!!!!
Here is a little story I was told when I was young. Someone very special to me said I should share this. There were 4 children at church one day. 3 children were teasing this little girl. The little girl was crying and the pastor asked her what was wrong. She proceeded to tell him the children were teasing her. Well the pastor took the three children in a room and asked them what was going on. The children said they were teasing the little girl but they apologized to the her but she just kept on crying. The pastor gave them each a paper plate. He put a bit of toothpaste on the plate and then told them to put the paste back in the tube. He left the room and came back a few minutes later. The children tried and tried but could not put the paste back in the tube. The pastor told them that is how when you say mean things to a person once you say it does not matter how much you apologize you can never take back what you say. The moral of the story is: THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK. BEC

16things To Do At Wal-mart
Thought this was great,,gives me ideas,lol 16 things to do at wal mart 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares".... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?" 9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where

Think Before You Speak
Here is a little story I was told when I was young. Someone very special to me said I should share this. There were 4 children at church one day. 3 children were teasing this little girl. The little girl was crying and the pastor asked her what was wrong. She proceeded to tell him the children were teasing her. Well the pastor took the three children in a room and asked them what was going on. The children said they were teasing the little girl but they apologized to the her but she just kept on crying. The pastor gave them each a paper plate. He put a bit of toothpaste on the plate and then told them to put the paste back in the tube. He left the room and came back a few minutes later. The children tried and tried but could not put the paste back in the tube. The pastor told them that is how when you say mean things to a person once you say it does not matter how much you apologize you can never take back what you say. The moral of the story is: THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK. BEC

Think Before You Speak..everyone Should Read This
I just read this in a Bulletin & besides reposting it, I had to stash it and blog it for everyone to READ. ---------------------------------------------- There were 4 children at church one day. 3 children were teasing this little girl. The little girl was crying and the pastor asked her what was wrong. She proceeded to tell him the children were teasing her. Well the pastor took the three children in a room and asked them what was going on. The children said they were teasing the little girl but they apologized to her but she just kept on crying. The pastor gave them each a paper plate. He put a bit of toothpaste on the plate and then told them to put the paste back in the tube. He left the room and came back a few minutes later. The children tried and tried but could not put the paste back in the tube. The pastor told them that is how when you say mean things to a person once you say it does not matter how much you apologize you can never take back what you say. The moral o

Thinking
Thinking and thinking, When will I ever all in LOVE? Feel either the pleasure or pain? I want to feel the good and evil. The word LOVE, Nobody can explain. Once you're with that special someone. It could be month, days, years, even weeks to figure out what LOVE means in your eyes. I wonder does LOVE have a destiny or trail. When you're in LOVE, Don't be blammng LOVE for your actions that you do to another person to hurt them. Can you feel stronger or weaker? Does it make you high in the sky or as low as the dirt under the earth? If you fall in LOVE you should be committed or at least 100000% honest to your partner. It takes alot of people to fall in LOVE over the months, years, and days or maybe at first sight. Every person in this world is differnt when it comes to fallen in LOVE. It might sound insane or stupid, But it's not you. Everybody isn't the same when it comes to finding LOVE. If someone says they fell in LOVE at first sight, on the net, at a store, etc. Just be the

50 Things Women Tend To Do Wrong In Bed...
(JUST TO LET YOU KNOW - I DID NOT WRITE THIS) 50 Mistakes Women Make When Having Sex. 1. Assuming he can get a raging hard on when it suits you. Contrary to popular belief, men can't just flip a switch and get it up because you decided to stop being a frigid bitch. Getting it hard is your job. I suggest you figure it out. 2. Thinking that kissing needs to be this sweet romantic thing all the time. Sometimes pressing your lips against your partners mouth while you get off is the hot. It depends on the situation. 3. Leaving him responsible for your orgasm. You know what gets you off. Tell him. If you don't, it's your own fault when he's snoozing and you're all wound up. 4. Expecting him to cuddle. Men and women are wired differently. Sex makes most women want to talk and bond and all that shit. It makes men pass out. It's a biological thing. Stop fighting it, and stop holding it over his head, it's not his fault. 5. Expecting him to fall asleep with you in his arms. Tha

~ 15 Things To Do @ Wal-mart ~
15 Things to do at Wal-Mart when your going to be in there for a long time: 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares.... and see what happens. 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' 9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows

Things Moving Slow Or Just Not Moving
I am tired, it is almost 1:30 am and i have to work today, oh well fuck it i have delt with no sleep, before, just tired of this lonely life, I would say there is a good woman out there for me somewhere, but I don't want a good woman, no I want the kind that my mother always warned me about, just can't meet one, I mean how hard should it be, I am young handsome, and well thats something I aint talking about, but it seems like nothing I do changes, and for all of you who think I am just bitching, well if it had been three years since you had been laid you would bitch to. This is all I want, and all I have wanted for a while, I want a woman who is older, even just a year or two older, intellegent, sexy, and above all else be able to match my creativity, both in life and the bed room. Anyways, I think I am going to try and sleep, I will probably end up putting something else on here later, for now I better stop rambling and go to bed.

60 Things U Didn't Know About Me
60 Things You Wanted To Know About ME 1. What is in the back seat of your car right now: Nothing. I just cleaned my car out on Saturday...make note this never happens! 2. When was the last time you threw up? A couple of weeks ago...don't ask 3. What's your favorite curse word? FUCK MAN! 4. Name one person who made you smile this morning? Bolivar 5. What were you doing at 8:00 this morning? getting ready for work 6. What were you doing 30 minutes ago? Sitting at the front desk so Joycey could go pee. 7. If you could marry any celebrity today who would it be? Matt 8. Have you ever been to a strip club? yep 9. What is the last thing you said aloud? "don't clutter my mind with extra facts I don't need" 10. What is the best ice cream flavor? vanilla but only because you can add stuff to it depending on your mood. 11. What was the last thing you had to drink? raspberry flavored green tea 12. What are you wearing right now? purple shirt, black capri

Things I Like
So, I've said it before...the world would be a much better place if we all just told the truth... about who we are, what we like and what makes us happy. This is my attempt to start a new world revolution of being honest...not with the intention of hurting anyone's feelings. Harm none is the rule of my world, live and let live, I judge no one ...so what ever gets you thru your day is fine with me as long as you don't try to push it off on me and I will continue to live that way when I can. here is the list of likes: in no particular order white sexy men ... (not all white men are sexy and not only white men are sexy but they are the ones that usually RAWK my boat. ) sausage, extra cheese and canned mushroom pizza art mostly photos, poetry dark, fantasy and erotic art, but I am open to every kind I LOVE Luis Royo! music of every kind outdoors in small doses sitting in the back yard looking at the moon & stars expressing my personal beliefs zoning out on no

Things Arent The Same Old
things are always changin so when someone says "same shit or same old " they really dont know what they are talkin about just cause u have the same stuff happen to u doesnt me that it is actually the same thing u hear me so when u blog write or annouce that it is the same thing then u need to shut up and realize that it isnt the same thing.

10 Things Women Should Know About Men
1. Don't think you can ever change a man… unless he wears diapers. 2. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. 3. If he asks you if he's your first tell him, "You may be, you look familiar." 4. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times men wouldn't ask for directions. 5. Men are all the same… they just have different faces so you can tell them apart. 6. Go for young men… they never mature anyway. 7. Never let your man's mind wander… it's too little to be let out alone. 8. If they put a man on the moon… they should be able to put them all there. 9. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was clean. 10. Women don't make fools of men… most of men are the “do-it-yourself” type.

Things Women Say...
The things we say and what we really mean......... FINE This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. FIVE MINUTES If she is getting dressed; this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. NOTHING This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with 'Nothing' usually end in "Fine." GO AHEAD This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it. LOUD SIGH This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing." THAT'S OKAY This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when

44 Things A Girl Would Die For
IF your a nice guy.. read this ..if your a jerk.. learn this ladies: this will make you tear up :) fellas: read it, all of it! :) 1-touch her waist 2-talk to her 3-share secrets 4-give her your jacket 5-kiss her slowly are you remembering this? 6-hug her 7-hold her 8-laugh with her 9-invite her somewhere 10-let her be with you when you're with your friends keep reading 11-smile with her 12-take pics with her 13-pull her onto your lap 14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. fight back 15-when her friends say i love her more than you, deny it. fight back and hug her tight so she cant get to her friends. it makes her feel loved Are you thinking about someone? 16-always hug her and say "i love you" when you see her[but only if you really mean it. dont miss use i love you, or it wont mean anything] 17-kiss her unexpectedly 18-HUG HER FROM BEHIND AROUND THE WAIST, and hold her there, just like that and whisper something into her ear

10 Things Your Girl Shouldn't Know
Woman often tell themselves that they need to keep some secrets from their men. Well, the inverse is true as well. There are certain things that your woman should never find out about you. For instance, she doesn't need to know about the hot girl who works at your office, and you don't want her to know that you cried for a week after your ex dumped you flat. After all, you always need to maintain some leverage in your relationship. And as soon as your lady has all the goods on you, the power distribution will have shifted dramatically. Furthermore, keeping some information to yourself might help keep her honest, and it saves you from the risk of public embarrassment. Here are the top 10 things your gal should never know about you. Keep this valuable info to yourself, but remember this: If your woman can potentially find out about any of the following from another source, you might as well give it up right now. If she discovers any of your little secrets by means of an alternate p

Things I Learned While Out And Not Drunk
Ok, so last night I met up with the fellas at Dixie's. We had a few nice drinks and Rude and I played a game of beer-pong against some guys who apparently were 5-1. 6-1 after us. But amongst our good times goofing off and having some drinks, I started noticing people that I don't really enjoy. For starters, people who wear sports teams jackets and know nothing about the team they are sporting. Some jackass had the nerve to wear a Man U jacket. When I asked if he was actually a fan or just wearing it, he says he's a big fan. So I ask him his thoughts on a history making game that just took place, he didn't know what I was talking about. Maybe you're not feeling me because I'm talking about the most popular team in the most popular sport in the world. Let's tone it down to Charlotte standards. It's be like someone wearing a Panthers jersey and not knowing who they played in the Super Bowl a few years ago. Next are the buzzards, vultures or maggots. Depending on their as

Thinking Of You2
YOUR HAIR SO THICK AND DARK. YOUR EYES SO BIG AND BROWN. YOUR LIPS SO SOFT AND LUSCIOUS. YOUR HEART SO SOFT AND WARM. YOUR MIND SO EXCITING AND EROTIC. YOUR HANDS SO BIG AND STRONG. THESE ARE ALL THE THINGS THAT MAKES ME LOVE YOU ALL ALONG!! LOVE YA HONEY!!

Think About This..
think about this.. You can call me: "redneck", "hillbilly", "slaker", "Cracker", "Honkey", "Whitey", "Gringo" and you think it's OK. ...But when I call you coon, jiggaboo, Kike, sand nigger, rag head, Towelhead, WOP, Camel Jockey, Gook, slant eyes or Chink you call me a racist. -You say that whites commit a lot of violence against you, so why are the ghettos the most dangerous places to live? -You have the United Negro College Fund. -You have Martin Luther King Day. -You have Black History Month. -You have Cesar Chavez Day. -You have Yom Hashoah -You have Ma'uled Al-Nabi -You have the NAACP. -You have BET. -If we had WET(white entertainment television) ...we'd be racist. -If we had a White Pride Day... you would call us racist. -If we had white history month... we'd be racist. -If we had an organization for only whites to "advance" our lives... we'd be racist. -If we had a college fund that only gave white students scholarships...you know

Things That Make Me Wonder About Guys. This Is Just An Example
I am now finding out that my ex did to me exactly what he did to his “ex”-wife. He moves us here from up in the Ohio/Michigan area. I invested over two years of my life and my boys (2) life with him and he goes and leaves us for his new “witch” and her kids(4). The thing is I used to be her sitter and did not see it coming. What gets me is that he does not know her like he knew me before we got together and that she is not working either now. I caught him at her place on a Thursday night. He stayed the night with her and tried to tell me that nothing happen. I now wonder how many other times he said he was going some where and it took longer than it should have if he had indeed gone to see her. At that point he said he we moving back to his mom and dads. Come to find out he never planned on going to his parents place but to move in with her. It is really odd that I can recall plenty of times where he was at the same place when she was there and I did not think any thing of it becau

Things You Should Never Say To A Judge
Things You Should Not Say To A Judge 1. "I got your community service right here pal!" 2. "Boy your chamber sure does look different with the lights on." 3. "You couldn't carry Wapner's gavel you moron!" 4. "You're not as easy to buy as others said you were." 5. "No you robe wearing geek." 6. "I don't suppose there's a "You get me off, I get you off" type of deal out there?" 7. "Just out of curiousity, are you wearing pants?"

Things Only Southerners Know
Things Only Southerners Know Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them. _____ Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess." _____ Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder." _____ Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is -- as in: "Going to town, be back directly." _____ Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table. ------ All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well. _____ Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. I

The Things Kids Say !!!!!!
Kids are the greatest thing on this earth!Sometimes they do and say things that catch us so totally off guard.two things that happened this week that is absolutlt priceless.On Tuesday was 5 yr old neice was at t-ball practice she plays outfield,shes also a primpy,girly-girly,but this child also is very outspoken and says and does anything,while standing outfield waiting for the ball to be hit to she,she wellto put it very bluntly farted and very loud the parents and everyone in the stands heard this.I thought my sister would die,the absolute only thing that could or would come out of her mouth was,I'M SO PROUD OF MY TALENTD DAUGHTER.everyone burst into laughter,it was certainly a momment no parent would forget.Last night my Daughter-in-law was getting my 5 yr old grandson ready for bed every now and then he has accidents in the bed so he wears pullups,yesterday she bought a different kind then he usually wears.She put one of these on him and they were huge on him.He looked at at this h

Things Aren't What They Seem
Im in a place in my life right now where I am at a crossroad in alot of different aspects of my being. Relationship wise ecspecially. How hard it is to hold onto something that is covered in oil and just keeps slipping away. What does it mean to love someone so much that you would rather see them hurt then let them go??? I just don't know. The whole concept of love is shakey to me anyways. And just when I thought i knew what it was about, it went and changed on me again. Its like a small child. Can never sit still and changes everytime you turn your back. AAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

21 Things To Remember
ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully. TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other. THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want. FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it. FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye. SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married. SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight. EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much. NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely. TEN. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling. ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives. TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly. THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?" FOURTEEN. Remember that great ! love and grea

9 Things I Hate About Getting Old
1. That by the time most people have saved enough money to travel the world, they are too old to endure such a trip. 2. When your childhood friend who was always better than you at everything is still better than you at everything. 3. That it would be socially unacceptable, at your age, to wrap a Fruit Roll-Up around your pinky and suck on it for two hours. 4. That future generations will look back on the early 2000s as an era in which we did nothing but look back at the 1970s and '80s. 5. Remembering how people of your current age seemed so old when you were a child. 6. When the agony of turning 40 makes you ashamed of how depressed you felt on your 30th birthday. 7. That every time you come to accept your current level of hair loss, there's a more profound stage awaiting you. 8. When your heart skips a beat, reminding you of its eventual failure. 9. Watching the era you grew up in turn from the recent past to retro to history.

Things That Are Difficult To Say When Drunk
THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Innovative 2. Preliminary 3. Proliferation 4. Cinnamon THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Specificity 2. Anti-constitutionalistically 3. Passive-aggressive disorder 4. Transubstantiate THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: 1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex. 2. Nope, no more booze for me! =) 3. Sorry, but you're not really my type. 4. Taco Bell ? No thanks, I'm not hungry. 5. Good evening, Officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight? 6. Oh, I couldn't! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke. 7. I'm not interested in fighting you. 8. Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance as I have no coordination. I'd hate to look like a fool! 9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this parking lot or on the side of the road. 10. I must be going home now as I have to work in the morning.

16 Things It Took Me Over 50+ Years To Learn
By Dave Barry, Nationally Syndicated Columnist ============================================ 1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. 2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its f ull potential, that word would be "meetings." 3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness." 4. People who want to share their political views with you almost never want you to share yours with them. 5. You should not confuse your career with your life. 6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. (This one is very important!) 7. Never lick a steak knife. 8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip. 9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time. 10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregn

9 Things I Hate About Everyone
When we have too much time on our hands and we start to get old and crotchety, we think of these: 1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? 2 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually. 3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? 4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? 5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor. 6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

Things I Need Help.. With For My Pics.. So If U Can Help A Sexy Woman.. Heres Ur Chance...
( not begging here... i know how u all like my pics) ok sexy men on here.. i need some help getting some sexy outfits here.. i wear size large and side 11.. and i also need stockings and garders, sexy thigh boots and heels size 8 on both.. i love red,black,purple..leather too red and black,hats and neck ties.. sexy other little things to help me with my pics.. so if u all want to help out.. please send then to this address.. 1000 N 10th salina Ks 67401.. and put Ms. joy gonzales.. this isnt where i live.. so keep in mind.. dont try to stalk me.. ok.. please please ... make pics requests.. and i will try to do them.. if anyone wants to help me please do.. i would love it.. thank u

29 Things To Make You Smile..
Some of these are old, but they might still make you smile! > > > > >1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he >was God and I didn't. > >2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. > >3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them. > >4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. > >5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. > >6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me > >7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. > >8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. > >9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing. > >10.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. > >11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy,why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine. > >12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many. > >13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. > >14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. > >1

15 Things You Probably Never Knew Or Thought About
1. At least 5 people in this world love you so much they would die for you. 2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way. 3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be like you. 4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone , even if they don't like you. 5. Every night , SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep. 6. You mean the world to someone. 7. If not for you , someone may not be living. 8. You are special and unique. 9. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you. 10. When you make the biggest mistake ever , something good comes from it. 11. When you think the world has turned its back on you , take a look: you most likely turned your back on the world. 12. When you think you have no chance of getting what you want , you probably won't get it , but if you believe in yourself , probably ,sooner or later , you will get it. 13. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the r

5 Things Never To Say On A First Date
We all know that first dates are the ultimate relationship chess match. Men and women take their turns making verbal moves -- with the hopes that nobody's going to get rooked. But the truth is that first dates, very often, can be pretty far from the truth, with men and women acting as spinmeisters who do what they can to put their best faces (and personalities) forward. The stats certainly tell us that many people lie on first dates (35 percent of men say they lie about their income, and 35 percent of men also say they lie about their willingness to commit). But if the goal is to determine whether the two of you may be a good match, then part of the process is not just detecting the lies, but also knowing the best things to say-and avoiding the worst. Do that and you'll be well on your way to being the kind of person who will engage, interest, and intrigue your across-the-table mate. Say This: What do you do for fun? Not That: What's your job like? Standard quest

~things Seem So Grey~
Hey, have you seen them? Please don't go away. This lighting is so dim, Things seem so grey. Looking left to right, Search top to bottom, Try switching on the light, Oh, you tried 'em. Hmmm, that doesn't help, Fishing in the dark, Stub my foot and I yelp, Still, I embark. I've got to find them, Got time to help me? Oh good! You're such a gem! Please God, I plea. Hey, did you find them? Please don't go away. This lighting is so dim, Things seem so grey.

Things That Go Wtf In The Night.. Lol
people post random shit that noone really cares to know... like the fact that my ex bf from the Corps apparently called my house last night @ 2:45am and thinkin he was talking to me (in reality it was MOM) and asked "just how much sex do YOU wanna have?" so my mom hung up on him LOL Drinks @ the local watering hole for the night: $90 Cool looking cell phone to make drunk calls with: $75 a month Suave & sexy personailty: free Making a drunk call at 2:45am to your ex gf's house only to attempt phone sex with her MOM! : PRICELESS

Things I Have Learned
>If you will take the time to read these. I promise you'll come away with an >enlightened perspective. The subjects covered affect us all on a daily >basis! > > >They're written by Andy Rooney, a man who has the gift of saying so much >with so few words. Enjoy....... > > > >I've learned.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an >elderly person. > > >I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows. > > >I've learned.... That just one person saying to me, "You've made my day!" >makes my day. > > >I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the >most peaceful feelings in the world. > > >I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right. > > >I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child. > > >I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the >strength to help him in some other way. > > >I've learned.... That no matter how serio

30 Things I Learned From Porn
1. Women wear high heels to bed. 2. Men are never impotent. 3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory. 4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her. 5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm. 6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men. 7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob. 8. Women always orgasm when men do. 9. A blowjob will always get a woman out of a speeding ticket. 10. All women are noisy cummers. 11. People in the 70's couldn't cum unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background. 12. Those tits are real. 13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt. 14. Men always groan "OH YEAH!" when they cum. 15. If there is two of them they "high five" each other. (and the girl isn't disgusted!) 16. Double pen

10 Things To Do In Walmart When Your Bored As Hell, And Your Gf Is Shopping! (yes Ive Done All Of These)
1. Grab some boxes of condoms and put them in other peoples carts when they are not looking. 2. Go the to clock isle, and set all the alarm clocks to go off within 5 minutes of each other. 3. Move the Wet Floor signs to a carpeted area. 4. Hide in the clothes racks, and wait until someone walks by, then wiggle the hangers and say in a strange voice, "Buy me Buy me". 5. Impersonate a Walmart employee and give people directions to the wrong Isle. 6. Go into the changing room and put on a moo moo, then come back out and ask someone if this moo moo makes your ass look to fat. 7. Go into the changing rooms wait for 10 minutes then yell, "WHERES THE TOLIET PAPER?" 9. Bring a bra up to a walmart employee and ask if they have it in a size smaller then an A-Cup. 10. Go into the toy isle, and locate the loudest toys they got, and press as many buttons as you can within a minute and walk away.

70.things.i.stole.from.alvin.
My 70 Confessions 1. The phone rings. Who do you want it to be? la la la 2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart? not usually...cuz what would the cart people have to do then? 3. If you had to kiss the last person you kissed, would you? nope :D 4. Do you take compliments well? not really.i get all shy and shit.

Thinking Of You
I stop and sit in a corner With millions of things going on around me Yet I block them all out All I can think about is you I take out your picture And just stare Thinking about How it would be if I was with you Playing with your black hair with amber highlights Staring into those beautiful innocent black eyes. And wondering what secret they hold Thinking about How wonderful it would be to glaze a kiss on those cute pouty lips How fulfilling it would be just to hold you in my arms I begin to realize something My heart shall never be complete til I’m with you My one and true love You are my darling queen My love

10 Things That Annoy Just About Anyone
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? 2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. Remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually. 3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Well, DUH! What good is cake if you can't eat it? 4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? I want to bitch slap them! 5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No, Loser. I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the fucking floor. How many idiots do they let into the theatres these days? Is there a non-stupid ppl section I can sit in? 6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"....*Shakes head in disbel

10 Things I Hate About You
10 Things I Hate About You Poem by 10 Things I Hate About You album: 10 Things I Hate About You I hate the way you talk to me, And the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots And the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick, It even makes me rhyme. I hate the way you’re always right, I hate it when you lie. I hate it when you make me laugh, Even worse when you make me cry I hate it when you’re not around, And the fact that you didn’t call But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you, Not even close… Not even a little bit… Not even at all.

Thinking While Driving.
My hips hurt from the love that we make. My mind is spinning My arms want to be on your body My legs are tired, why I don't know. The idea of seeing you again The idea that this is what I have always wanted The idea that love songs are now making sense The idea that this could be what I think it is. My dog wont stop smelling my shoes Is he aware of the sweat? Is he aware that I would love to replace him in my bed for you? Is he in serious like too? I can't stop thinking about what you say I can't stop smelling my skin so I can smell you too. I can't stop wishing this was the weekend and I could sleep over I can't stop wanting you near me. I like our times apart I like our times together much more. I like how you hold me I like how you kiss me. It's becomming easy again It's becomming what I need again It's becomming what I can't live without It's becomming a thing that when I think about my future I hope you are in it too. So I drive home, I pass ca

Things I Like And Dislikes.
Hi there I thought I would tell you alil about some things I like and dislikes ok. Dislikes men who are rude and rude people, Dislikes people who are fake and rude online. Dislikes myspace everyone thinks its soo cool but not like this site myspace has alot of child perves on there and even cops too you have to be careful and who you talk to on there and also who the kids talk to on there also. Likes I love kissing and cuddling caressing a nice a body. Likes I luv to cook. I love all kinds of music except mexican sorry cant understand it hehe. Likes I luv to see a woman on a toilet its soo erotic yes of course its private and taboo but soo beautiful realy. Likes I luv sex toys of course who dont. Likes I have kinky pics up yes but I dont eat share or wear it ok. Likes I have listened in as a woman went to the bathroom and yes some of you women have also but of course alot are shy or wont even admit it but still have done it hehe. If any of you have any other questio

Things Going On Today...
I'm wearing my faire garb to work. I'm trying to convince people that they shoudl go to faire at least once this run. I think it's working. Even if it isn't it's really fun to jingle with every step. *grin* I found a picture of my friend Rachel and I taken at faire last Sunday. It's actually a great shot and I even printed it out and stuck it to my board here at work. :) What else? There was going to be a script read through tonight at my house for the horror film I'm in but one of the girls is ill, the director is way to busy and he cant' reach the third girl. I'm now supposed to see if any of my 3 female friends wants to be in a horror film. And that's about it. I'll update on monday and see if there's any more pictures from faire this weekend.

Things I've Learned ...
Things I've learned - Author Unknown I've learned. . . that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change. I've learned. . . that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that. I've learned. . . that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. I've learned. . . that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life. I've learned. . . that it's taken me a long time to become the person I want to be. I've learned. . . that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them. I've learned. . . that you can keep going long after you think you can't. I've learned. . . that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. I've learned. . . that either you control your attitude or it controls you. I've learned. . . that regardless of how hot and

5 Things That Piss Me Off
I GOT TAGGED! my friend, andrea, wants me to tell five things that piss me off. she says i am funny when i am mad. ive been told that before. ok, well, here goes. 1. i really hate it when you are sitting at a red light, it turns green, and before you have time to move your foot from brake to clutch and gas, someone is blowing their horn. this happened again the other day. people in too big of a hurry to get somewhere but not smart enough to leave a little earlier to get there on time. this guy blew his horn just as i started to move and that just went straight through me. i slammed my breaks on. he said something in sign language and i replied with the same. people, if you are in that big of a hurry you should have left earlier. if you are late, its not the fault of the person in front of you. ITS YOUR FAULT. 2. everytime i go through a drive-thru, i place my order followed by "thats all". everytime i hear the words, "would you like a ____ with that?" WTF! w

Things I Hate Today.....
I've decided to start a blog about things I hate. We do this in a forum I'm a mod for and it helps to relieve tensions and anxieties...not to mention let you vent...lol...so feel free to post a comment with your own hates for the day...it feels good to get it out!! So here goes.... 1) Long responses between IM messages or shouts...anyone awake on the other end? 2) men that think they are my Master..LMAO 3) rude customer service....whatever happend to being courteous? 4) weeds...need to pull those suckers soon 5) stubbing my toe on a hand weight and now the sucker is purple and hurts like a MUTHA...shit!

Thinking
I am thinking about my friend, he is so sweet and shows how much he cares for me. He knows who he is. I can't wait to talk to him again. Maybe I can talk to him on the phone sometime soon. I did not have time on my phone to talk to him. But he did leave me 2 messages and they were so sweet. His voice is just so sexy...

Things To Ponder..
Here are a few things to think about while you are relaxing... Can you cry under water? How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered? Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to? Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity? Why does a round pizza come in a square box? What disease did cured ham actually have? How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours? If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing? Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV? Why do people pay to go up t

40 Things Never Said By Southerners
40. Oh I just couldn't. Hell, she's only sixteen. 39. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex. 38. Duct tape won't fix that. 37. Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael. 36. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken. 35. We don't keep firearms in this house. 34. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer? 33. You can't feed that to the dog. 32. I thought Graceland was tacky. 31. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe. 30. Wrasslin's fake. 29. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace? 28. We're vegetarians. 27. Do you think my gut is too big? 26. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy. 25. Honey, we don't need another dog. 24. Who's Richard Petty? 23. Give me the small bag of pork rinds. 22. Too many deer heads detract from the decor. 21. Spittin is such a nasty habit. 20. I just couldn't find a thing at Walmart today. 19. Trim the fat off that steak. 18. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso. 17. The tires on that truck are to

Think You'll Get A Big Laugh Out Of This One!
A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference to an organisation. Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?" "Well, 'he explained, "The restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift." As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his

Thinking
i Just wish for once things would work and i wish i could be a good person to many yet it seems i fail somone in it all ,everthing i try to do good in seems to fail befor my eyes i hurt thinking of 2 people i sorta lost today and it makes me wish for some serenity but then again maybe i deserve to feel pain who knows all i know is ive done my wrong and i admit to it i jus hope everthing settles out and things go back to some normace

Things To Ponder ....
Who are the Dickens and why must we run like them? How exactly does one get high on the hog? What would you do with someone's goat once you got it? Would tit for tat be an even exchange? Is a pig in $h!t really all that happy? Why can't beggars be choosers? Everyone has their standards. And who are "They" and why are they always saying things?

Thinking
I am always thinking of you About all the amazing things you do I think about how we love each other And would do anything for one another I think about your gorgeous smile And how this is all worth the while I think about our amazing relationship And our journey on this trip I think about the memories in the past And how all this is going to last I think about our wonderful life together And how I want to be with you forever I think about our love being so real And all of the feelings that I feel I think about you showing me what love is all about And how you're always there to help me out I think about you being the only one And how you shine like the sun I think about the ring I gave to you And how it represents my love being true I think about how He sent you to me And how I love you endlessly I think about giving you my whole heart And how you are a beautiful piece of art I think about how you are my entire life And how I want you to be my wife I think ab

Thinking All The Time
thoughts and sighs Missing one both thoughts and sighs Desire for one left in these eyes Want and need never satisfied Tried in the fires it has never died Longing for one their look and glance Knowing that this is more than chance That one can make all thoughts so fond It is something more and far beyond Anything each had dreamed of A gift from on high in heaven above By R. Thomas Dinsmore

Things Ive Learned
A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said...no. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever...and he said no. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he replied with a no. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said... You're not pretty you're beautiful. I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be! with you forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die... SO NOW I WILL SAY: I like you because of who you are to me...A true friend. Remember: "A good friend will come, bail you out of jail.... But a true friend will be sitting next to you saying WE screwed up! " I¡¦ve learned that Enemies stab you in front.. Bitches stab you at the back And JERKS stab you in the heart But a true friend is sitting there with a knife to stab those assholes right back Proud to be your Friend! I've lear

Thinking About Life.......
Ive been thinking alot about everything thats been happening in my life lately. I never expected growing up that my life would end up like this. I wanna take a little bit of time to vent and see if I cant get a little advice at the same time. For those of you who know me personally, you already know a little bit about whats been going on. But still even those closest to me have no idea how I feel about it. Im very good about keeping my feelings bottled up inside me until I explode. Most people think Im a hard-ass, which I still am, just not all the time like I make people think. I grew up like most kids do. My parents got divorced when I was a young child. I think I was about 5 years old. Like most people who get divorced, my parents strongly disliked each other. In fact, I dont think they said more then 15 words to each other until my sister had her first child. Which was 16 years after they got divorced. Dad got custody of my sister and I and we saw mom every other weekend. It w

Things To Do At Wal-mart While You Wait For Your Family To Shop
Things To Do At Wal-Mart While You Wait For Your Family To Shop 1. Get boxes of condoms & randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I think we have a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens. 5. Put some M&M's on lay away. 6. Move CAUTION WET FLOOR signs to carpet areas. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department, tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people leave me alone." 9. Look right into ! the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose. 10. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible.' 11. While handling guns in the hunting department

Thinking Of The Smile
The smile that owns me Smile that is to me so wonderful and sweet Smile that is all I have longed to greet Love the smile that hold my heart Wishing to hold the owner and never part From sweet smile and sun dancing eyes I am so I love with that smile it’s no surprise That such beauty hold my captive and true Smile for me when we meet and I will belong to you By R. Thomas Dinsmore

The Things You Go Thru In Life.
O.k. this is the thing my husband an I have been talking about him leaving his job fer sometime now,, he is sick of the bullshit in which goes on out there, I mean his boss is such an ass and well I dunno if you all know what pigging is however it's very hot and he gets burnt damn near everyday, he was to get out of the runner and into the crane operator position but as always he's got fucked over. Don't get me wrong the money is awesome but with him gettin hurt an all that shit it's not worth it to me,, plus we have a business of our own in which we can fall back on,, just thought I'd get this off of my chest it's been bothering me fer sometime now. Note: Pigging is cleaning the molted iron which gets to be 2000 + degrees.

70 Things About Me!
Body: 70 things you might not know about me!!! 1. What are your initials? KEJGL 2. What is your favorite thing to wear? Not much, I don't like feeling restricted by clothes. 3. Last thing you ate The clump of sugar in the bottom of my iced coffee. But I didn't mean to. 5. I say Shotgun, you say? G'head, I'm driving anyway. lol 6. Last person you hugged? Sean.. Right this second. lol 8. How many U.S states have you been to? All of them. One of the benefits of travelling with the Professional Bowler's Tour. 10. Does anyone you know wanna date you? Doubt it haha, anyone who knows me knows I'm head over heels already. 11. Name one thing you like physically about yourself. I like my eyes a lot. 13. Who is your best friend? Sean, Stacey M, April. 14. Why are you up so early? It's 3 pm... 15. Who/What made you angry today? The freaking construction people today. Let the other direction go TWICE while we were all waiting to get through. Took alm

Things Guys Should Know
Girl Language WHEN i RUN AWAY FROM YOU - FOLLOW ME WHEN i POUT MY LiPS - KiSS ME WHEN i KiCK - HUG ME TiGHT WHEN i CALL YOU CRAZY - iM CRAZY ABOUT YOU WHEN i AM SiLENT - iM THiNKiNG OF HOW TO SAY i LOVE YOU WHEN i iGNORE YOU - i WANT ALL YOUR ATTENTiON WHEN i PULL AWAY - GRAB ME BY THE WAiST & TELL ME YOU'LL NEVER LET ME GO WHEN YOU SEE ME AT MY WORST - TELL ME iM BEAUTiFUL WHEN i SCREAM AT YOU - TELL ME YOU LOVE ME WHEN YOU SEE ME WALKiNG - SNEAK UP BEHiND ME, & REST UR HEAD ON MY SHOULDER iF I DONT CALL YOU - iM WAiTiNG BY THE PHONE FOR YOUR CALL WHEN iM SCARED - HOLD ME BY THE WAiST WHEN i LOOK LiKE SOMETHiNGS THE MATTER - KiSS ME & TELL ME EVERYTHiNG WiLL BE ALRiGHT WHiLE i HOLD YOUR HANDS - PLAY WiTH MY FiNGERS

44 Things A Good Would Like
1-touch their waist 2-talk to them 3-share secrets 4-give her your jacket 5-kiss them slowly 6-hug them 7-hold her 8-laugh with her 9-invite her somewhere 10-let her be with you when you're with your family 11-smile with her 12-take pics with her 13-pull her onto your lap 14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. fight back 15-when her friends say i love her more than you, deny it. fight back and hug her tight so she cant get to her friends. it makes her feel loved 16-always hug her and say i love you when you see her 17-kiss her unexpectedly 18-HUG HER FROM BEHIND AROUND THE WAIST 19-tell her she beautiful not sexy! 20-tell her the way you feel about her! 21-kiss her on the lips 22-DONT ask her to buy you stuff. you buy HER stuff 23-TELL HER WHAT FEELS GOOD 24-make her feel loved 25-buy her stuff. small things can still help 26-don't lie to her 27-dont cheat on her 28-take her anywhere she wants 29-txt messege or call her in the morning and tell her hav

36 Things U Wouldn't Think To Ask
1. Have you ever been searched by the cops? nope 2. Do you close your eyes on roller coasters? sometimes, if its the MAMBA at Worlds of Fun 3. When's the last time you've been sledding? wow, years 4. Would you rather sleep with someone else, or alone? someone i care about... 5. Do you believe in ghosts? only when Im home alone on stormy nights 6. Do you consider yourself creative? yes 7. Do you think O.J. killed his wife? hell yeah.. 8. Jennifer Aniston or Angelina Jolie? Jolie..i like her lips 9. Do you stay friends with your ex's? hell no, they are an EX for a reason 10. Do you know how to play poker? learning 11. Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight? yep 12. What's your favorite commercial? D'Wade & Barkley on couch watching old Barkley clips and he says "Now that's impressive" ..."how u fit in those lil bity shorts....SEXY" 13. What are you allergic to? milk, but i drink it anyway 14. If you're driving in the middle of th

Thinking Of You!
I cant find my way, I cant block out the voices, Cant stop following the light guiding me, Cant stop thinking of you, Cannot stop this breakdown, Cannot stop the pain of burning myself, Can not stop the thoughts racing through my mind, Can not stop feeling so depressed, The depression takes over me, The light guides me deeper into it, The thought of u drives me insane, The breakdown makes me vulnerable, The pain and thoughts making it worse, I cannot be saved from this obsession, This obsession with hurt, pain, and depression.

Think About It
Idle Thoughts of a Wandering Mind I had amnesia once -- or twice. ***** Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic. ***** All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy. ***** If the world were a logical place, men would be the ones who ride horses sidesaddle. ***** What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free? ***** They told me I was gullible and I believed them. ***** Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home, and when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto the freeway. ****** Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone. ***** One nice thing about egotists ... they don't talk about other people. ***** My weight is perfect for my height ... which varies. ***** I used to be indecisive. Now, I'm not sure. ***** The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity. ***** How can there be self-help groups? ***** If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales? ****

Things To Do On An Elevator
Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: 'Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!' Whistle the first seven notes of 'It's a Small World' incessantly. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: 'Got enough air in there?' Offer nametags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside down. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: 'I've got new socks on!' Meow occasionally. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose. Walk on with a cooler that says 'human head' on the side. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce 'You're one of THEM!' and move to the far corner of

44 Things A Girl Would Die For (a Repost Thing)
i wish some people would do this... ladies: this will make you tear up :) ¢¾ fellas: read it, all of it! :) 1-touch her waist 2-talk to her 3-share secrets 4-give her your jacket or t-shirt 5-kiss her slowly ARE YOU REMEMBERING THIS? 6-hug her 7-hold her 8-laugh with her 9-invite her somewhere 10-let her be with you when you're with your friends KEEP READING 11-smile with her 12-take pics with her 13-pull her onto your lap 14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. fight back 15-when her friends say i love her more than you, deny it. fight back and hug her tight so she cant get to her friends. it makes her feel loved ARE YOU THINKING OF SOMEONE? 16-always hug her and say "i love you" when you see her 17-kiss her unexpectedly 18-HUG HER FROM BEHIND AROUND THE WAIST! 19-tell her shes beautiful! 20-tell her the way you feel about her! OH AND ONE LAST THING YOU NEED TO SHOW HER YOU MEAN IT 21-Open doors for her, walk her t

Things I Say And Do
I tend to say some fucked up things I always seem to be an ass in so many different ways Yes i do regret some of them others I just cant say but no matter what I say or do my feelings for u never change I know you hate me and its gonna take a bit All i know right now is that I love you, and I feel like shit i wasnt tryin to be rude to you or hurt u in anyway But yea I put my foot in my mouth again what more can i say Im sorry babe i really mean it, And i hope u will forgive me I know i fuck up alot and u know thats what kills me i dont want to lose you this way so please dont take it all away i dont mean to do alot of the fawked up things i do or say

Think You Can
If you think you are beaten,you are. If you think you dare not, you don't. If you like to win, but think you can't It is almost certain you won't... If you think you;ll lose,you're lost. For out in the world we find Success begins with our will It's all in the state of mind. If you think you are outclassed,you are You've got to think high to rise. You've got to be sure of yourself before You can ever win a prize. Life's battles don't always go To the stronger or faster man.But sooner or later the man who wins Is the man WHO THINKS HE CAN!!!!!!

Thinking Of Touching
THE TOUCH Nothing beats the human touch Is it any wonder we need it so much To feel warm lips pressed in tight Warm wet tongue that feels so right Probing and dancing in each others mouth Give rise to something much further south Pulling is tight and nibble your ear Breathing so hard yet we do not hear Hands that travel and roam places secret Wanting the touch is the safest bet Surrender to the feeling and letting go These are the thing that we all know Sweet passion drips from your lips to mine Your juices to me taste far better than wine Buck and grind into each other slow Small gasp and moans let us both know That we crave this deep touch and share ecstasy The look on your face is what does it for me To see eyes filled with passion and that wanting drive That is why the touch makes us both feel alive Love sweet touch is what we do fulfill We dare not go without for we need it still To be in a love where touch is lost and gone Wil

Thinkin About Me Bein Single
ya know i actually seen my love life expanding then all of a sudden it slaps me in the face. me and donnie got into it and now hes pissed and im pissed so we're thinkin about splits ville. but ya know it really hurts b/c we been 2gether for almost a yr and he still hasnt got over fuckin lookin at other chicks. thats wat pisses me off most. he says hes happy but it makes me wonder if he has 2 look at other pple ya know wat i mean. ne ways if pples r readin this guys give me some feed back on wat u think of this later and thnxs megan

Thinking Of U
I sit here quietly and watch the sun set Thinking of someone that I've never met I wonder does he think of me too Needless to say I am thinking of you Wanting to hold you, to see your face To take you away to a better place You feel so right, too good to be true I just can't stop thinking of you My friends say that I might regret Losing my heart to a boy I've not met I say there is nothing I can do I cannot help thinking of you I believe you were made special for me But wonder if that could possibly be I'm tired of being so alone and blue But I always smile when thinking of you

Thinking About Leaving Ct!
Im torn trying to figure out what I should do. So I thought Id ask my family and Friends. I love CT but theres just so much going on with contests and family drama. I love my friends and family and would do anything for any of you as some or most of you know. So I ask you now should I stay or should I go?