on friday at work, i was asked to come in early tonight to help start-up the machines and get things running all smoothly before folks got in to work tonight...i told them that i'd only do it if i got a my little pony out of it. little did i know that a pal from work, kelly, had my little pony fruit snacks and offered them to me after overhearing my demand. i immediately accepted because fruit snacks are radical...but....upon inspecting the package, i took a look at one of the ponies...and i thought to myself...by golly...these equines are hussies.
it's true...i mean take a look at this my little pony calendar, for example...
the ponies are like strippers or something...i mean, i have not once seen one of those ponies with clothing on....have you? no...those sinful beasts prance around with their nicely done hair, tattooes on their butts, and too much make-up on their faces...
oh, and their faces! look at their noses....it's so obviously they've had surgery to decrease the size of their nasal cavities. i have never seen a horse with a nose that small....they did it to seduce people. those little trollops. if you doubt that their goal is to seduce us, then why exactly do they put out calendars? and you know what? pinkie pie should have been miss december in that calendar, not miss june......dang it....save the best for last.
oh, and look at this product...you know what this is promoting, don't you? that's right...it's a subliminal message telling you to sleep with those little strumpets. yeah, they may be floozies, but they're masters of psychology...and they'll do what it takes to sell their bodies to lonely men.
but were they always like this? no....at one time, they were clean girls...take a look at this episode from the 80's....look at how wholesome they are...
i suppose that's how they went downhill...this tear-filled episode showed me almost immediately that those ponies were curious little gals and that they gave into peer pressure rather easily...that weakness probably made it easy for them to become those little harlots later on in life.
and i stand corrected, that pony with the southern accent in the episode wore clothing and shoes...so perhaps there is at least one pony with decency amongst those little tramps...or maybe it's really just a man pretending to be a woman...after all, if a man pretended to be a woman while naked, he'd easily be found out....perhaps it's this southern man-woman that used peer pressure to turn those innocent ponies with the tattooed butts to the slutty jezebels that they turn out to be later on in life.
the biggest proof that these ponies are the trollops that i claim them to be is at the official my little pony website, which can be accessed by clicking
here. on this site they pomote "live stage shows." oh, i SO told you people!! those ponies are strippers, galloping around all naked-like. they're profligate ponies...that's what they are. and they're promoting pinky pie in it...my sweet pinky pie...they've gotten her into this whole mess....i'll never forgive them!! live stage shows....i'm onto their filth. they can't fool me...i know what they're doing to pinky pie. those filthy beasts.
they also promote "tea parties" on that site....oh, is that what they're calling it these days? back in my day, we called 'em orgies. i dunno about you folks, but i don't wish to see hot pony-on-pony action...especially not with those michael jackson nose-jobs they sport...call me crazy, but i like my equines natural...uh, not that i like horses in that way...
these stuck-up little floozies have also caused some of the ponies shunned by their little "beautiful people" group to go on a rampage and take out their anger on the rest of society...take a look at this real-life example...
how sad....it's sad when the lust for popularity can turn something so innocent into something so vile...these ponies turned to making people suffer for their unhappiness...and their unhappiness was caused by the arrogance of the my little pony trollops...except for pinky pie....i refuse to believe that pinky pie, my adorable pinky pie, is one of those harlots...those jezebels. i mean, just look at this video with her in it...
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!.....it can't be....in that leaf.....no......they finally....went and did it!......dang you!!! dang you all to heck!!!
...i can't deal with this anymore...i'm a wreck....pinky pie is one of them now....it's as if they destroyed my one last ounce of hope in the world...i feel so emotionally and spiritually drained, i...i made a visual of what this compares to...
...yes...it's as if i was told that my home no longer exists....my poor, sweet pinky pie...what's become of you....why have you become a floozy?...i'm sorry...i can't write anymore....i need to be alone.....bye, folks....
