ive made a lot of bad choices and im bound to make many many more.its so hard knowing what the right choice for the future is, what may seem right at the time can be completly wrong later . i guess my fears are normal its just that i dont want to fuck up . i dont want to do the stupid things my mom and dad did or even just repeat my own mistakes. im at a point in life that i have to make a lot of major decisions. i have to find a better place to live, i need a better paying job with benefits, i need to enroll in school and i need to decide weather or not im ever gonna start a family. im young but sill its improtant shit to think about. i know im gonna have to change a lot of things im not gonna be able to be the crazy kid i am now. i love living in california, yeah its expensive and crazy but ive grown up here i love it. deep down i know i have to leave. i wont be able to have the life i really want here and if i did ever start a family id have to work two or three jobs just to support them . im scared , i have no idea what to do.. in short ive got a lot to think about.
