I'm getting fired... because my fucking application at Macy's
... ... OH SHIT! ... I work for a corporation.
got flagged, and now they're saying I lied on it...
"Have you ever been convicted of a felony"
"Do you have any reason to think blah blah blah blah, wonk wonk wonk"
No, but I was arrested once. *shrugs*
I followed it to a T what my lawyer and social worker had informed me to do.
They pulled me off the line, the very nervous HR lead talked to me... I just knew it wasn't good. I've been through SO much bullshit, that my bullshitometer can detect within 5 degrees of error. So, I knew, something fucking weird was about to happen.
They said I lied. I said "no I didn't"
she said... "oh snap..."
I said "... yeah."
she said "well... I have to tell you to go home today, but you do have rights, I'll contact legal, and I'll get back to you whether you still have a job."
I smiled, shook her hand, and shrugged.
My black cat serenade continues.
I talked to my dad, and my mom, they're on their way to a funeral.
I have to talk to my lawyer later.
I have to talk to my lawyer.
I hope they fire me.
I've got a loaded firestorm just WAITING at this point.
I chuckled though... to my dad, and said "I think we're really starting to circle in on the cause of me being unemployed for six months".
He was pretty depressed. So am I.
And this will all look... REALLY bad on future interviews and employment history... like my shit wasn't bad enough.
And to all my unlisteners out there I have an announcement: Hey babe, remember when I said you ruined my life?
Fuck you, and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
Six months since you got me arrested... for YOU and your fucking sugar daddy getting HIGH ON ABSYNTHE, breaking into my house and beating the hell out of ME.
Just another black cat serenade.
I think there's something broken at this point...
I just keep laughing.