AS anyone who has been following this blog know things for me haven't been going so well lately. Its hard when love comes to an end. For me just coping seems to be a near impossibility. Its real hard to function. I dont hate my wife for falling out of love I guess its just one of those unavoidable things. Someday I hope to understand the reason behind it. Dont know if I ever will. I try to be the best man I can. Now that its gone I dont want to lose faith in myself. I hear it gets better. I keep waiting fo that to happen. To me it just makes me question everything moreso than I already do by nature. How do I know what is real what is pretend. Maybe life for me is not meant to have love maybe I am just one of those unlovable people. I know I always say I like to be alone. I think I am wrong. Its nice to be alone by choice but when your alone this way it sucks. I guess I should quit believeing and just know this is what it is I am powerless to change it. Hopefully things will even out in the end. Life as I know it is forever changed it will never be the same.
