Ninja's blog: "The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly"

So I decided to get my full birth chart for my zodiac. What they do is take your exact birth date and time and tell you about yourself. For the most part, I'd say this is me.  Apparently my OCD was predetermined! LOL What I disagree with is in this color.

Here's what I got

The Sun in Scorpio
The Sun and its place on your chart are the most important information astrology can provide you with. Your most powerful energies and force-of-will are denoted by the Sun's position. Traits: Determined, Forceful, Emotional, Intuitive, Powerful, Passionate, Exciting and Magnetic

Dark Traits: Jealous, Resentful, Compulsive, Obsessive, Secretive and Obstinate

You were born during a period when the Sun was in Scorpio. Intuitive and ever curious, Scorpios are the great investigators of the Zodiac. They want to know everything about everyone. When an answer is needed, a Scorpio will find it for you. Unfortunately Scorpios seem to see only in black and white. They always have their own agenda and never fail to promote it.

Scorpios are the masters of their fate. They know only one way to live: on their own terms. They do not live life but attack it. When life hands them a loss, they do not waste time sulking, but rather continue on their path, sure they will eventually succeed. Scorpios are driven by their intense passions and desires. Often they are seen as imperious.

Scorpios are a secretive lot. Those around them may never know the depth of their passions. Probing the Scorpio psyche will only make them leery and cause them to flee. Whether in business or play, Scorpios love to compete. Indeed to do well, they must have an opponent. Scorpios do not take slights well. If you cross them be assured they will retaliate with their full force. Scorpios never quit and never surrender. If anyone can get a difficult task done it is a Scorpio.

Sun Opposition or Square Moon
You feel your wants and desires are pulling you in different directions. For instance you may need to express your individuality to the maximum, but you desire a warm, loving relationship and the security of strong camaraderie. This dichotomy makes it difficult for those around you to tell what you want.

Sun Sextile or Trine Mars
Your optimism and energy make you attractive to most people. You love to compete and win, but manage not to be a sore loser. You are full of justified self-confidence that will take you a long ways towards success in any venture you attempt.

Moon In Aquarius
The placement of the Moon on your chart denotes a region of life you travel through based upon your instincts. The Moon's placement often points to emotional issues we must address.

Emotions simply don't impress you. Often you will appear emotionally shutdown to those around you. You seem to have complete control over your emotional self, so you control what and when and whom you develop feelings for.

Your need for friendships may be more important to you than having close family ties. Indeed you may avoid your family as much as possible. You develop numerous friendships with all sorts of people and cannot tolerate jealousy or anyone threatening your freedom to create a social circle composed of whomever you chose.

Moon Sextile or Trine Saturn
You can be relied on to keep your wits about you when in the midst of a crisis. While others are frozen by events you will manage to come up with a plan to overcome the current crisis. You tend to keep your true feelings to yourself, which often makes others question the depth of your feelings.

Mercury In Libra
The position of Mercury on your chart will give you insight into how you communicate with others and learn.

You have a prodigious talent for bringing people together. Whether in a business or social setting you can usually find a solution to rifts that occur. Your objectivity allows you to see all sides of an issue free of prejudice. Whatever the setting, people know they can rely on you to be fair and truly seek solutions and compromises that benefit all parties equally.

Mercury Conjunct Jupiter
Your mind loves the world of abstractions. You love to explore the "essence" of things and seek a clearer view of life on a cosmic scale. You see life as a learning experience and will seek knowledge through all of your years. Your penchant for sharing concepts and knowledge make you an ideal teacher.

Mercury Conjunct Saturn
You take thinking very seriously and are equipped with a mind capable of very deep, complex thought. Because you have the tenacity to probe deeply into a subject you are an excellent candidate for a career in research. In social settings you tend to be a bit reserved, and are far too serious minded to enjoy trivial chat.

Mercury Sextile or Trine Neptune
You are attracted to avenues of thought which defy the rational. When allowed your imagination takes you to places most people don't know exist. The arts probably attract you as a form of personal expression.




Venus In Sagittarius
Where Venus appears on your chart will provide you with information on how you relate to others on an emotional level.

You express your affection in a manner very much your own. Many people find you almost irresistible. However you do have trouble opening up to people on a very intimate level. Because of this many of your relationships that could develop into something very intimate remain platonic. Your ideal mate must be able to stimulate you mentally.

You love all things unique, and are attracted to people who are overtly different from most. You view of life as journey towards finding your and expressing your true and total self. Therefore, you need unrestricted autonomy to move through life in whatever way you choose. You understand people's need to be themselves and respect their need to be their true selves.

Venus Sextile or Trine Jupiter
While you are sometimes more than a bit indolent, you are a warm, caring person with a great sense of humor. You actually enjoy helping others, but you're not one to go looking for people to rescue.

Venus Conjunct Neptune
You are a true romantic armed with an idealism and imagination to fan passion's fire. You have a mental picture of the perfect mate, which may cause you trouble if you actually believe anyone can live up to your fantasy lover. Those who attract you usually have an aura of enigma about them.

Venus Sextile or Trine Pluto
The intensity of your passion either draws people to you or makes them flee! You are capable of such deep emotion some really do find it disconcerting. You are very charming and those of your sexual preference find you very attractive. You can be a bit of a manipulator.

Mars In Virgo
Mars is the planet of action. Its placement on your chart will indicate your level of aggression and competitiveness.

You aspire to have your work meet the highest standards. Excellence is not a goal, but a necessity to you. Because you set such lofty guidelines for yourself you often feel that only you can do the job right. You pride yourself in maintaining an error-free work environment. When things do not meet your expectations you can become very bad-tempered.

Your need for perfection can cause you to doubt your own abilities to attain a goal. While you are usually very realistic about what you can achieve, there are times when you turn projects down, because self-doubts make it seem you are not adept enough to reach the project's goal. You can also be a bit picky, which may alienate those working with you.

Jupiter In Libra
Jupiter deals with where the Universe is definitely on your side.

Your diplomatic skills and ability to keep things in balance make you a great team-player. People know you will treat them fairly and listen to their side of a story without bias. You have a knack for finding solutions that benefit all sides of a conflict.

Jupiter Sextile or Trine Neptune
You approach life and people with an open mind. Your inner world of fantasy and ideas is very rich, so it is likely you are not as concerned with material success as most.

Jupiter Conjunct Pluto
You have high expectations of yourself and the tools to meet them. You have ample energy and raw talent with which to chase your dreams. Although you are warm and friendly it is likely you usually socialize with people who might be able to help you attain your goals.

Saturn In Libra
Saturn probes our sense of inadequacy. Where Saturn is on your chart will provide a key to where you feel your weakest.

For you intimacy may be more of a chore than a pleasure.

Saturn Conjunct Pluto
You are not one to want to be center-stage. Indeed, you usually don't want to be on the stage at all. You're always looking for ulterior motives to explain the behavior of others. Fear of becoming vulnerable keeps you from expressing your feelings and thoughts to others.

Uranus In Scorpio
Because of distance Uranus is from the Sun, its astrological influence is measured in increments of 7 years. What this means is that the effects of Uranus influence an entire generation. The placement of Uranus on your chart denotes an area where you can expect the unexpected from the Universe and yourself.

Because of distance Uranus is from the Sun, its astrological influence is measured in increments of 7 years. What this means is that the effects of Uranus influence and entire generation.

Your generation is noted for their willingness to dispel social taboos of all kinds. You push the boundaries of accepted behavior. Fanaticism is a common trait in your generation.

Neptune In Sagittarius
Because of distance Neptune is from the Sun, its astrological influence is generally measured in increments of 14 years. What this means is that the effects of Neptune will influence an entire generation in a like manner. Neptune is the Astrological Wildcard. The area in which Neptune appears on your chart is a place where there are no rules. Anything can happen.

You are member of a generation of dreamers and purveyors of the future. You and your contemporaries are very broad-minded and thrive on new forms of spirituality. Traditional religions are far too dogmatic to serve you well, so you are very likely to explore alternative routes to find your spiritual self.

Neptune Trine Pluto
You were born in a period when there was an underlying current of spiritual awareness prevailed. Collectively your generation has a desire to increase the depths of their spiritual self.

Pluto In Libra

Because of the distance Pluto is from the Sun, its astrological influence is generally measured in increments ranging from 12 to 30 years. What this means is that the effects of Pluto influence an entire generations.

The Pluto/Leo collective includes people born within a 12 year time span. Those under the Pluto/Leo influence want to improve how people communicate on both a social and personal level. You feel much of the world's problems stem from poor communication, so the best way to create a better world is to create more effective forms of relating to one another as individuals as well as groups.

People of this generation truly want to create a more harmonious world in which to live. To do so they are often quick to lessen the importance of their differences and concentrate on what is important to all humans.

More About Scorpio

Famous Scorpians:
Marie Antoinette, Marie Curie, Martin Luther, Theodore Roosevelt, Bill Gates, Lorne Michaels, Picasso, William Penn, Christopher Columbus, Sally Field, Joni Mitchell, Mohammed, Prince Charles, Goldie Hawn, Roberto Goizueta, and Voltaire

Ideal Occupations:
Scorpions are well-suited for careers as doctors, investigators, ecologists, managers, engineers, navigators and secret agents.

Lucky Numbers: 8, 17, 26, 35, 44, 53

Scorpians Are Usually Most Compatible With: Pisces or Cancer

Planet: Pluto

Element: Water

Star Stone: Opal

In light of recent events brought to light, I figured it was time for a new blog.

First off, I'd like to say that there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with being proud of your heritage, no matter what that is. It is perfectly acceptable to celebrate yor ethnicity, nationality, sexuality, creed, gender, etc. It's wonderful to know who you are, and where you come from. You want to seek out similarly defined people here, go right ahead. The issues come in when you make a public racially exclusive group. And don't for one minute think an exclusive minority group is any less racist than an exclusive white group. If you can't see that, then your head is stuck too far up your ass to realize it.

Fubar is actually one of the few social networking sites that is very adamantly against racism of any sort. They have a zero tolerance policy, and do enforce it.

There is a point where Pride crosses the line into prejudice. And some really need to think long and hard about whether or not their interactions don't have more to do with skin color than character.  ANY racially exclusive group is racist.  There is no way around that. It is discriminating against another for membership or benefits due to the color of their skin, or lackthereof. That is the definition of racism.

Always remember, when you blame others for all your problems, you miss the real issue. That issue, it's you. You can't move forward if you aren't willing to reconsile the past and the present. No one in this life owes you a damn thing. You owe it to yourself to do what you need to make your life the way you want it. You owe it to your children to teach them that hard work and perseverence along with education is a definite recipe for success.

The more you know, the less you don't know. 

I can't sit here and claim I knew Crystal at all, because I didn't. What I know of her is only from those who cared about her. What else I know is that her tragic death didn't have to happen.

Too often women (and let's face it, men too) get in relationships that turn violent. They ignore the warning signs of the first smack, the second too, thinking, hoping that they will be the one who saves him. You can't be. Don't sit there and think an abuser will change. Don't wait until they become more psychotic and grab a weapon. Break the cycle and run away. There are safe places you can go to get away. Don't wait, because the next time, might just be the last time.

There are a few easy to recognize warning signs that your relationship may have the potential for violence. Please don't ignore them. Break the cycle and find a loving relationship. And if you are guilty of these, please get some professional help to address your insecurities so that you too can find a healthy, loving relationship.

Does the person you love

• constantly keep track of your time?

• act jealous and possessive?

• accuse you of being unfaithful or flirting?

• discourage your relationships with friends and family?

• prevent or discourage you from working, interacting with friends or attending school?

• constantly criticize or belittle you?

• control all finances and force you to account for what you spend? (Reasonable cooperative budgeting excepted.)

• humiliate you in front of others? (Including "jokes" at your expense.)

• destroy or take your personal property or sentimental items?

• have affairs?

• threaten to hurt you, your children or pets? Threaten to use a weapon?

• push, hit, slap, punch, kick, or bite you or your children?

• force you to have sex against your will, or demand sexual acts you are uncomfortable with?

• lose their temper, or become violent?

• abuse drugs or alcohol?

• claim you are responsible for their enraged emotional state?

If your partner exhibits any of these warning signs, please take them seriously. These problems don't typically go away, they seed and fester until they explode. Don't be there when he (or she) takes it too far.

I've noticed how easily it seems some people blur the lines between fantasy and reality to the point that they can no longer distinguish the two.

It happens a lot with addicts that think their behavior doesn't affect anyone else. It happens with compulsive liars who think bending the truth is perfectly harmless. It happens with jealous people who can't stop chasing someone that threw them away long ago. It happens with STALKERS (yep, I said it) that can't accept that a relationship is OVER. And it happens here. In this place where people let real life and online fun get so intertwined that they forget to go out to a real bar, grab a real drink, and hang out with real friends.

Over the last few weeks, in New Orleans, we had Mardi Gras. I spent my time with the best people getting a little more than wasted because, well, drinking + no eating = the real definition of FUBAR! But, like always, we did it BIG and in style. No one went to jail (except my sister AGAIN) and no one got hurt. I've spent a lot more time on Bourbon Street than I'd care to admit, but I had so much fun with my girls. Since I've moved about 50 miles away from them back to the Southshore (grab a map and figure it out) I only get to see them about every other weekend, but I get called, text, and harassed until I make my way back out there and spend some time with them. It's because they miss me. They miss the company, the comedy, and the shenanigans that is inevitable when we all get together.

The point of that is to remind you that there are REAL PEOPLE out there that have real relationships with other real people and that most of us normal people do indeed have better things to do that deal with your make-believe little world that you can't even control. If you can't control your own world, what makes you think you can control someone else's? You need to UNPLUG, step back and really figure out just how much you are just a pawn. And you know what happens to all those pawns? They get sacrificed. In life's great big chess match, you are an insignificant player trying to match up against a Queen. Sadly, you will always lose.

I want to make a point that everyone should already know, but some apparently don't, there are real friends on fubar, and fubar friends. You might think you are more to someone than you actually are, and in most cases that is probably true. There are those that you share everything with. That's the one you NEVER fight with because it would be catastrophic to both your lives. Those are your REAL friends. There's some you share a hello and passing conversation with now and then. Those are your acquaintances. You should know the difference. Don't think that you will be able to manipulate real friendships. Real friends communicate regularly and can easily determine just how full of crap you are.

Remember, you are only important if you leave a lasting imprint on the lives you touch. Acquaintances scratch the surface, whereas real friendships are etched into the soul. And the impression you leave should make the person smile when they think about you.

To those who are tattooed on my soul, I love you all. You know who you are. To those who think they have the power to cut me, try, try again. You haven't even broken the skin.

That's enough for now.

If you have to try to erase the record, then you didn't have the nerve to say it in the first place.

Being able to vocalize your opinion is not a bad thing. Standing up for yourself is not either. Openly bashing good people because you think you can profit in some way by doing so, THAT is where you are going to regret some things. If you want attention, there are other ways to go about getting it. If the attention you receive forces you to change your message, that should tell you that there is something wrong with how you decided to convey your message, or that it was just plain spiteful.

Most of us here have a firm grasp on reality. We know that relationships on and off fubar differ greatly, and that while some people are here for the social interaction and to play the game on occasion, others make this their careers. They blur the line between online life and real life to the point that they no longer realize that real life exists away from the computer screen, away from the web cam, and away from the page stalking.

I would also like to remind people that ONLINE RELATIONSHIPS and REAL LIFE RELATIONSHIPS are two very different things. If you honestly think your online instigating will destroy real life friendships, you are an idiot. If you think that befriending people you claimed you hated just so you have some common targets is really a good idea, think again. We all see it, we all laugh at your futile attempts to try to remain relevant to anyone but yourself.

Another thing that makes you look really stupid is fake profiles! Stalking people is CRAZY. Making a whole new profile to stalk someone makes you an even bigger big bowl of effin NUTS! And when someone comes to me and asks me to help them with outing your crazy ass, if they have the screen shots, you can believe you will be blogged and shown for the nut-job you are. I also want to stress the fact that if your actions come across my desk, and we talk, there is a good chance that I will approach you personally before I take MY time to write a blog. There are many things I am approached about that I try to handle quietly before they blow up to epic proportions. And sometimes, people just need to be shown that their behavior is irrational to understand that they need to get themselves in check. The only time that I will proceed without direct confrontation is if I am blocked, as I look at that as the person waiving their right to mediation.

This brings me to the importance of documentation. If you want to be taken seriously when you make claims of harassment or that you were screwed out of something you were promised, make sure you document EVERYTHING. A screen shot takes 5 seconds to take, and is invaluable when it comes to showing people that you aren't the one instigating the harassment. It also shows concrete proof of the contents of the conversation, so that you can stand by your word 100%.

That leaves me to make the point of the importance of standing by your word. Also, the utmost importance of choosing them well before running off at the mouth. When you make blogs, especially video blogs, everyone can see and hear your insecurities, jealousy, and ignorance. Before you choose to jump on that bandwagon, REALLY think about whether or not you possess the skills to relay publicly what you can with written word.

When someone comes to me with a problem regarding another member, I ask them to write it all down. The purpose of this is simple, it gives me a  solid way to reference exactly what your problem is, and address it in its entirety. It also gives me something concrete to compare your story and theirs. I do not play the HE SAID/SHE SAID game. I want to hear both sides from the source. And if there's no proof to back it up, I will not publicly make any kind of accusation. I have no problem letting my name and my face be attached to something that I have personally verified, but I will not be used for vendettas.

We are all adults here, maybe it's time that some people learn that. You don't have to retaliate because someone hurt your feelings. You have the ability to be a better person. Do not let someone else make your decisions for you. Choose your friends based on how they treat you, not on how others claim they are. You have every right to learn your own lessons and make your own decision. That is not to say that you should be blind to what they do or have done. But if it is something that you can live with in a friend, then so be it. And for Pete's sake, do not bash another person for doing the same thing your friend does.

I think that is enough for today.

*steps down from soapbox*

"I put all my genius into my life; I put all my talent into my works" ~Oscar Wilde

"The important thing in writing is the capacity to astonish. Not shock - shock is a worn-out word - but astonish.” ~Terry Southern

I know you're scratching your head, wondering, "Just what is she getting at with this?"

The answer is quite simple. The lost art of meaningful, documented communication known as writing needs to become rediscovered.

Written communication has been used for over 8,000 years in one form or another. It had been used to record history, debts, feelings, accounting, and random thoughts. It's memory has never failed, and it's purpose has never ceased to be necessary. It doesn't need electricity, or even paper. It's permanence as record will go on as long as there is someone with the interest to read it.

In the "Digital Age" the importance of reading has been trivialized to the point that the art of the written word is rapidly becoming lost. The masterful texts that have survived for millenia are pushed aside for reality television and youtube videos. Instead of picking up a copy of a good book, we just wait for the movie, right? But so often the theatrical adaptation is so far from the author's original view, it's deplorable. Even ancient Greeks and Romans knew the importance to record their orations so that future generations could study them with ease. They knew that there was no greater way to leave their legacies with the masses than to publish them. Advances along the way, such as the printing press, the typewriter, the copy machine, e-books, etc, have given us this wonderful wealth of information and creativity in a conveniently searchable and categorizable way that is available at the touch of a button. Yet, most choose not to bother.

What writing does that speaking does not is offer a the person a chance to proof-read exactly what they are saying, and trying to convey, so that if multiple meanings are possible, they can go into more detail if necessary. It also afford the writer and the reader the opportunity to reference a point more easily. You can completely embellish a point so that it makes complete sense without having to talk in a circle. You can input and remove ideas and explanations and change the order of things so that from start to finish, they are linear and logical. For those of us who have A.D.D. and tend to jump topics frequently when in conversation, it affords us the opportunity to stay on subject, or at least easily come back to the point where we were. As you reread it, you can clarify things that might have been more ambiguous in the beginning. You can add an anecdotal story to make your point clear, or you can be pithy.

The beauty of the written word can evoke strong emotions, actions, and inspire, persuade, and reject. It can hurt as well as heal. It can show adoration and admiration in a way that speaking never could. It forces the reader to use their brain to conjure images and emotions that the author is trying to evoke. Words will always mean more when they given in a permanent record. Much like a tattoo, written words become a permanent part of our existence, whereas spoken ones only become part of those who choose to listen. Those who choose to listen can also choose to interpret an entirely different meaning than you sought to portray.

Memories fail, and ears deceive, but that which is set in stone will always remain accessible to remind.

On that note, I shall step down from my proverbial soapbox, and leave you to take from this what you choose.

Thanks for reading. Now go out and astonish.

It's been a month or so since I've blogged here last, and apparently some have missed the last one I did post. (Take some time to catch up if you need to.)

I know you clicked thinking you knew what this blog was all about. HAHA! You're so wrong!

I wanted to take this time to put a spotlight on the importance of accomplishment.

There are so many milestones in life (and I'm talking real life, not online life) that sometimes we forget to step back and really take the time to relish the feeling of accomplishment. Life moves so fast sometimes that we forget to acknowledge to ourselves that we have done something wonderful. There is absolutely nothing wrong with praising yourself for reaching a goal.

As a lot of y'all that are close to me know, I just finished a remodel and the house, and it is now officially a home. However, what most people don't know, is that the house I remodeled actually is owned by my uncle. He's in the Navy and stationed elsewhere, and my sister is the one who destroyed this house in the first place. In the middle of all that, I also took a leap of faith, and started my own business. A leap that I am so glad I did take. The exact accomplishments aren't the important part. The important part was that at the end of it all, I could look at it everything and have something solid and amazing to account for my time, and how I was spending it. This was my baby and my brain child, all developing and growing at the same time. And when it all came together, and became solid, I grew so much as a person.

And it's that personal growth that I want you all to take the time to savor. Everyone has an accomplishment that they are proud of, and want to tell the world about. If it means something to you, don't be afraid to let yourself be proud of it.

Parents should feel accomplished when their child brings home their first 'A' from school. Parents are the lucky ones who get to continue to accomplish great things through their children's milestones as well.

Never say to yourself or anyone else "this is how I am, that's not going to change." If that's how you really think and feel, it's true, you won't. You will never grow into the person that you have the potential to become. Settling down doesn't mean settling. There's never a point that you should stop setting goals for yourself. You should never stop asking yourself what you want to be when you grow up, because you should never be too content to stop growing.

On a side note, with personal growth also comes personal responsibility. And it's only when you can accept that for the good, the bad, and the ugly, that you can truly become a complete person. 

I'll be doing some blogs in the near future. I know, I know, you can't wait! But you have to. I have to go clean my kitchen and get some work done.

Happy reading, and feel free to leave your reached goal as a comment. Or anything else. It's open for all.

Apparently some of us aren't.

I felt the need to write this little blog to remind people that you are supposed to be ADULTS and act accordingly.

In the last few weeks, I've been pretty silent, and mostly M.I.A. with real life, but I do log in here and there to help out some people and rate family and friends. That step back has shown me some really ugly faces on here. Some that I would not even expect. Now, I won't name names because everyone has the right to see others for themselves.

I would like to take a minute and share some things you should AVOID:

1. DO NOT make fake profiles to harass people who have you blocked. IT IS NUTS. It makes you a psycho stalker. If they blocked you, THEY DO NOT WANT TO TALK TO YOU. It's that simple.

2. DO NOT try to talk shit about another member just to get ahead. You can refer back to my blog about rumors. All that does is show people what a manipulative, jealous, and otherwise immature dip shit you are.

3. DO NOT bash another member in your status message. It's juvenile, and you earn the tag "drama whore" really quickly.

4. DO NOT take your fubar beef with someone to real life. I don't care that you don't like me on fu. But don't even THINK about taking your crazy shit to my friends on facebook. Also, DO NOT bring your real life beef with someone to fu. I don't care that you two broke up, so you're now stalking all his female friends just to make sure he is never happy again. I don't care that she left you for your roommate. IT IS NO ONE ELSE'S BUSINESS. Personal life is PERSONAL. Learn how to keep some things private! Perhaps a little self-reflection of WHY you two aren't together anymore would really behoove you.

5. DO NOT scam people out of things on here. All it will get you is blogged, and news here spreads VERY quickly.

6. DO NOT EVER put pics of your children in a folder with scantily clad or compromising pics of yourself.

Some things that might make things a little more pleasant for us all:

1. Use your real pics. No one here likes fakes except other fakes.

2. Learn how to respectfully communicate with people. Don't approach women and ask them to go see your NSFWs. There's a really good chance that you will earn a block quickly. Most women on here really don't care about your teeny weenie.

3. Put some clothes on. If you don't want to, LEARN HOW TO MARK YOUR PICS NSFW. I don't want to see a close-up of your vagina in my bar tab. Especially since the pics are now HUGE if you scroll over them.

4. You probably might not want to solicit in your status message. It makes you look like a whore. And I'm pretty sure your NSFWs aren't worth 100 bucks.

5. Treat your friends here with the same regard you treat your friends in real life. If you wouldn't back-stab your life-long bestie, why do it on here?

6. Remember, most courts are allowing things posted online to be used against you in custody cases, divorces, lawsuits, etc. Really think about what can come back and bite you in the ass before you decide to hit that send button.

That is all for now.

No, I didn't mean resolutions.

Resolutions are ideas to change without an actual plan to do so. Many people make and break them, year after year. This year, before you set down and decide what it is you are going to change about the past year, also set yourself a plan to enact that change.

I would like to take this opportunity to challenge people to make a change in the new year. The change I'd like to see is a small one, but it makes such a difference in your life, and the lives of the women around you.

Women, I would like you to do one thing every day to make another woman in your life smile or feel as beautiful as you see them. We all know the litany of spam that comes from men, and it's meaningless for the most part. It doesn't compare to the positive impact that the praise from another woman can give.

This is actually something that I have committed myself to doing over the last year or so. I became a Mary Kay consultant because I wanted to make my friends feel as beautiful on the outside as they were within. Doing so, I realized that the more women I helped the better I felt about myself. I also learned that the confidence boost they got from something as simple as a make-over or a day of being pampered with a facial made the little amount of time I took out of my day to do it worth it.

Most girls are inundated by the women in their lives to be competitive with other women. Mothers and daughters, mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law, friends, strangers, all fight for attention. What you don't realize is that the attention you are competing for, is just as easily shared. Women will fight over a man, completely neglecting the fact that he's screwing them both. They will hold grudges and plot, not realizing the time and energy spent getting even with another woman would be better spent by taking the time to do something special for another woman who supports you.

Jealousy and disdain do not have to be a part of your life. When you open yourself up to positive female relationships, you'd be surprised what monumental impact it will have on your life.

Happy New Years to you all, and I hope the best for everyone.

"True friends stab you in the front" ~Oscar Wilde

I am opening this blog with that quote, which is one of my favorites for a reason. Those we call friends can sometimes disappoint more than those we once considered enemies. The ones that we didn't get along with for one reason or another suddenly become closer than those who always appeared to be nice, sweet friends who "like to help others."

I am blessed to call some women on here friends now that were once on the opposite side of that line. They were never quiet about their feelings about me, nor was I about them. The catalyst always came down to a guy (go figure). It was always out in the open though. Never was a word said that the other wasn't aware of. That is the reason that these women are so much respected by me.

It's the ones who smile in your face as they stab you in the back that bother me.

Fubar is like a small town, and everyone knows everyone else's business, or at least pretends to know, and states is as fact with whomever will listen. This is how the rumor mill starts, and once it starts, it does not stop. Once upon a time, being a decent person took precedent over all the other crap that life threw. However, as of late, jealousy and greed breeds lies and rumors.

I want you to take some time and really think about what you perpetuate on here, or even in real life. If you hear a rumor, and pass it on, you are just as guilty as the person who started it. If it involves a friend, and you don't say something to the person about it, you aren't really their friend. If you turn your back on a friend over a rumor without talking to them about it's validity, you are just as guilty. Always consider the motives behind someone randomly throwing something about another person in a conversation. The only reason they are spreading the rumors is jealousy.  The person in question is getting attention that they want, and they have to do something to change that.

Now to put the quash on the rumor involving me. I am not a lesbian. I am sick of people asking me in my shoutbox almost daily if I am really a lesbian. NO I AM NOT. Yes, I fumarry women. There's two reasons for that. One, less drama. Two, men are only necessary for penis (and some of them aren't even good for that). I am happily single, and that isn't changing, ever. But being a cocky bitch doesn't make me a lesbian. Also, this is not an invitation to send me your penis pics either. I don't want to see it. Thanks.

So the lessons for today:

1. Rumors are the tools of the insecure to seed doubt about someone they are jealous of.

2. By spreading the rumor, you are as bad as the one who started it.

3. You don't have to tarnish someone else to make rank here. I'm proof of that.

4. True friends might not always start out that way, they might start off as an enemy. But when they do become friends, they are some of the most amazing people you can ever hope to lean on.

I am still an asshole, and that won't change. I've never been quiet about my feelings, and I damn sure won't start now. If you see someone ghosted from my life, it's for a damn good reason. Betrayal of trust is something I do not ever forgive.

I hope everyone has a wonderful New Year's.