HooLeeO's blog: "Musings of a crazed mind"

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
noticed a slowdown in the overall performance, particularly
in the flower and jewelry applications that had operated
flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0
uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance
9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable
programs such as NFL 5.0 and Hockey 3.0. And now Conversation
8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the
system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these
problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate

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Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind; Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment
package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try
entering the command

C:// I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME

and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0. If all works as
designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the
applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to
Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is
a very bad program that will create Snoring Loudly.wav
files.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or
reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported
applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have
a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
You might consider additional software to improve memory and
performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and
Lingerie 6.9.

Good Luck,

Joyce at Tech Support