before i go to sleep tonight - thought id share with you another episode of me 'thinking outloud'.. this time im thinking about 'empathy'. Empathy is the idea of understanding how another person feels... ive always had a bit of an ability with that - and its not a good thing.. seriously - empathy isnt all its cracked up to be. Empathy for another human being means that you seriously do 'feel their pain'... practically literally - you know what they are going through.. but cant do much about it. my mom use to say it was like 'having your nerves laid out across the whole world.. and people walking around stepping on them.' .. that sums it up rather nicely actually. Now dont get confused... empathy is not the same as 'understanding'.. for example.. i feel for a person and what pain they are experiencing... but that doesnt mean i understand why they made the choices they did that led them there - and yes.. i still think of many.. sometimes even MOST people as irrational morons - that make choices id never make.. but i also have a gift for putting 'their shoes on'.. and realizing.. that their situation is painful - and nothing i do can change that - i look around and see my problems - i see theirs - i see the guy down the street - and everyone elses.. combined .. and eventually it all wears on me... and i get to a point where i cant deal.
that my friends - is empathy.
im sorry this may be a depressing topic - hell.. i know it is.. but see - what im trying to point out is more the fact.. that sometimes i wish i had no idea what it felt like to be another - wish i had no empathy at all - it seems to serve no real purpose other than magnifying my own personal feelings...
hell - maybe i aint as damn gifted with it as i think --- maybe everyone feels it... maybe they just have a bit more finesse... more grace than i do about it - and dont sit and obsess about such things... ive always been analytical as hell.
or.... like ive said =) maybe im just drunk - you guys should be aware by now.. the only time i add to this blog is when im pretty toasted =)
but you also know.. i only say that to cover up my own insecurities with making a blog like this..... honesty isnt always the best policy -
anyway.. nite all =) hope i didnt bum you all too much =)
