Sitting here in the most beautiful place
Surrounded by warmth and light
Being in love is a grand thing
Your love brings the sunshine to my world
Even on a cloudy day
But without warning
Without any just cause
I see a shadow
The darkness I have fought for so many months
It crowds me
Knocks on my soul
Calling my name
As if I am something it owns
I draw on your love to push it back where it belongs
For now, I know I am holding it at bay
However, I fear that one thing I seem to have no control over
I refuse to give in to what lies there in the dark
The suffocating and squeezing that I feel in that abyss
Taking my breath away and pushing me to a place
A place of fear and unknown
I will not go back there
Do I have what it takes to hold it back,
To push it back where it belongs
For now, I fight what I cannot touch
I fight to hold on to all the light that warms my life
No room for the shadows
Nevertheless, weakness is here and I fear what I may not have the strength to fight
H*E*L*P! Four letters I want to shout
Muted sounds are never heard
Touch me, hold me, rescue me…
The things I ask of myself…
Searching for strength within
Alone and struggling
Sitting here in a room of light of warmth, I am chilled to the bone!!