I LOVE TO SPOON BUT I REALLY WANNA FORK's blog: "The World According to Catdaddy!"

It's sad how many people on here have been begging on a daily basis for profile rates ever since profile rates started resetting weekly. And the funny part about it all, is how they're so adamant that you re-rate profiles, re-rate pics, and comment, but do they even come to your page and return any sentiment, just out of common courtesy? Most of the time, no. And when they're called out on it, which seems to be a shitload of times, they write their "Fu-Hater" blog stating how they're so "flooded" with people rating and commenting them, it takes em so long to get back to all the people, therefore, you get lost in the mix. Well then, you shouldn't ask for something that you aren't ready to handle. Especially the blowback from not returning the "luv". As for me, anyone rating my profile and pics, it's nice and appreciated, but I won't beg for shit!!! Also, I return what's shown to me, in whatever fashion (besides spending my hard-earned money on virtual fu-gifts. That shit is gettin' way outta hand!!!). But I don't see the need to beg on a daily for your "friends and family" to come and re-rate. If you have some kind of real contact or correspondence with these people, guess what? They'll rate your profile on their own accord. They wouldn't need a "reminder" that your rates have reset, or that you're lonely and a sympathy addict, and need praise 24/7. But the most pathetic thing about the whole "re-rate spree" party, and the begging for people to come by your page to click a cherry, you know the easiest and least degrading way to get your page rated? GO AND RATE SOME PAGES YOUR DAMN SELF!!! It's amazing how many rates I get when I actually take it on myself to rate here and there. 99% of the time, the person I rated, comes back and rates me. Odd how that works, huh? So for now on, anyone, especially the women on here, if you have "Come and re-rate my profile" in your status box or profile headline, I will not come to your page for that. You want my rate badly enough, you'll come to my page and rate me. The way it should be in the first place..... But hey, that's just my opinion.........my word ain't law..........

This blog is being posted while my status reads "Do you want real friends, or fu-populartiy?". I put that up for a few reasons, and for a few people, but for one person in particular. It seems a bit odd that someone who spends their time on here begging for rates, bling, blasts, happy hours, and all kinds of irrelevant tokens of "affection", all of a sudden turn around and complain about not having "real" friends who talk to her. And I've seen it all too often on here, even before it was Fubar (remember Lost Cherry? I was here when this place was called that LoL). And the argument is still the same. Anyone on here who's more concerned about their ranking or how many points and fu-bucks they have, than how many people they relate to and actually converse with, should have no complaints whatsoever. ANY RATING you get will give you points towards your "goal". ANY COMMENT, even if it's rude or hurtful, will get you closer to Godfather, or Disciple, or (brace yourself) PROPHET (ooooh......). If you're a point whore, then be one all out. Don't half ass your way to Fu-Legend status. And if you happen to meet or befriend a cool person every once in a blue moon, bonus. But be honest with yourself, you're not on here to "make friends" or "show love" to your peoples. You're here to accumulate numbers (friends, rates, gifts, points, fake bucks, etc.). You don't wanna be respected, you wanna be idolized. You don't wanna be loved, you wanna be lusted after. You have a man, you have a child, you have a real life, why in the fuck are you so concerned about who re-rates your profile? You've had friends before fubar, and you'll have friends afterwards, why the fuck are you so stressed out about the declining amount of sexually-driven comments and shoutbox convos you receive on a daily basis. Hell, you've at level 26, you're still begging for points? I don't know what's more pathetic. To be one of the higher 1% of fu members and still begging for attention like your name is highlighted in hunter green, or the fact that someone would spend most of their text dedicated to asking for more of what they already have, then turn around and "threaten" to remove "friends" or "family" from one's list. It's time to knock you back into reality. You're an attention and sympathy freak, plain and simple. Not a good friend, not some amazing person that so many people wanna get to know. You're just an image of a scantily clad woman, used to get horny men to click 10 on you, and if you stroke em a bit, get them to spend their money on shit you will never ever have. So good luck with that "real friends without being real yourself" quest. Sad to say, it will end up fruitless. Maybe you should talk to your man and children about how they feel about it.....OH THAT'S RIGHT.....Your man does the same thing, too. Guess it's nice to have something in common with a loved one..... But hey, that's just my opinion.........my word ain't law.......... ALSO, if you happen to take offense to this blog, then maybe it was meant just for you.....Have a great weekend :P

As most of the people who know me and talk to me know, I am a truck driver. And because of circumstances beyond my control, I have been home longer than usual. But as of today, that will change. I am hittin' the road, and will probably be away from home for a month. I am excited to get back behind the wheel. I love truckin', not because of the money (lord knows they could pay me a lot more LOL), and not because of the relative ease or relaxation of the job. I love to go to so many places that I just wouldn't have been able to go without being in a big rig. To meet so many people, different walks of life, and really get a sense of how others think, do, and live around this country. As much as there are soooooo many downsides and pitfalls to being an OTR driver, I wouldn't trade this experience for anything. However, I will miss actin' a fool and chattin' it up with all the great people I've met in this short time, and the ones who I have known since this place was called "Lost Cherry". However, I don't have any delusions about this site. It is only a social networking site, not my life. There are a few of you that I would miss and think of often, but there are too many cool people on here to be hung up on a simple lil ol' trucker like me. And we all know this place will go on without a hitch, despite anyone's prolonged absence (sans Baby Jesus, of course lol). But I am a loving father first, a loving son second, and a trucker third. Fu-nutcase falls around #37 just below political aficianado and right above edible panty taste tester. But don't get me wrong, I do enjoy loggin' in and having a blast. Just will have to wait til September. Anyways, Hope you all have a great day, week, weekend, and month, and hope all goes well with your lives and loves. Also hope I don't return to another website name-change and more bells and whistles that I just can't get the hang of....LOL This is not goodbye.........Just see ya later..... Take Care, Coley aka Catdaddy :)

Here in Indianapolis, there was a double murder/suicide early this morning, which is a tragedy all in itself. And from the descriptions of friends, family, and people closely related to the victims, the perpetrator was having some serious mental and emotional problems. But he just had a history of mental and emotional problems, and today, he just happened to do the ultimate. But what got me, is all the so-called psychologists brought in to the news program, to explain or find a reason why he did what he did. Like "He's Crazy!!!", just isn't a good enough reason. It always has to be something in his childhood, or something to do with medication, or whatever. That just irks me. What has happened to this country? Do we ALWAYS have to be reassured at every fuckin' turn? The fact that there are evil and crazy fuckers in the world is just a fact! Not some "phenomenon" that needs to be defined or explained away. The fucked up thing is, a lot of us know the crazy fuckers in our neighborhoods. Or the crazy fuckers in our FAMILIES!! But it's a "hush-hush" topic, and we all try to justify why they're that way. BUT MOST WERE FUCKED SINCE THEY WERE LIL RUGRATS!!! You know you have that one cousin, or uncle, or niece who was just seriously fuckin' odd!!! No reason, no explanation, just fuckin' nutso!! But you knew not to give them matches, not to have them too close to sharp objects, and don't leave them alone with the kids. But no, we have to know what "drove" them to insanity. Now yes, I know that there are people who are pushed to the brink of sanity, but an overwhelming majority of us have a thing called A CONSCIENCE that keeps us from going too far with our frustrations and disappointments. I'm talking about the fuckin' whackos who have been whacky since birth. Ted Bundy, Jeffery Dahmer, Richard Ramirez, The Son of Sam, Jack the Ripper, and any other seriously crazy fuck, were fucked up long before their "events" that defined them to the world. Killing little animals when they were little, bullying other kids, sick obsessions they all had for OH SO LONG, but there is always some group to explain their behavior away. Instead of calling them crazy, like they are. I'm not really big on labels, but the "crazy" label needs to be REINSTATED, NOW!!! So we can actually keep more people from being hurt. And your overbearing need to believe you live in a safe, sane, and fair world is irrelevant to the reality that we live in a fucked up world. Maybe it will force more of us to keep our eyes open more often.... But hey, this is just my opinion........my word ain't law..........

How long have MUMM's been a part of Fubar? Over a year, now? And yes, we all know that most people on here don't know how a "mumm" works, since they only post generic POLLS instead of mumms that actually put out there choice to help them make up their mind. But what really bugs me, are the mumms posted by people who ask the online fubar masses to vote on whether they should do something that could make or break a relationship......HUH?!! How fuckin' flaky is your relationship that you need assistance from hormonally-amped, bitter, reality-impaired people to make a concrete decision about your love life? C'mon!! If your relationship is so lost, and you have no bearings on it, that you feel the need to subject yourself to the entertainment of people just chompin' at the bit to tear you a couple new holes with insults and put-downs, you need to break up NOW!!! And for god's sake, don't breed!!! Don't need to read that upcoming mumm either. :| Now don't look at me as "Wow, you insensitive asshole!!". I'm looking at this from all perspectives. And the only good thing I really see coming out of "OMG Me and My Boyfriend are in trouble" MUMM's, are profile points. And why put your personal business out over the net for point whoring? And even if you actually DO get some helpful advice, it's advice you already heard or already known, which should make you ask yourself, "Why did I post this? Am I that starved for attention and sympathy?". Now myself, I posted a mumm about a friendship that I tried to salvage. And honestly, half of me says I shouldn't have done it, but the other half says it was a good idea. But it was about a friendship, NOT AN INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP!!! And funny enough, there were 315 votes, and guess how the votes went LOL? 157 for save the friendship, 158 for leave her be and move on. Ain't that a trip? So it seemed that even the ones who voted and commented were torn on how that scenario should go. But it was an internet "friendship", not as deep as some "THIS MOTHAFUCKA IN MY HOUSE IS CHEATING ON ME, BUT I LIKE SUCKIN' DICK. SHOULD I.....A) GIVE HIM HEAD AND BRUSH MY TEETH REAL HARD ...OR B) TELL HIM WE'RE THROUGH AND I'LL GO SUCK ON SOME RANDOM DICK, AND JUST USE FLOSS". Fubar has many uses, RELATIONSHIP THERAPY ISN'T ONE OF EM!!! If there is trouble in the house, take care of it offline. All you're gonna do is throw gasoline on the proverbial fire. This site is 18 and over. You have real issues in your real life, get out of the VIRTUAL REALITY on fubar you created, grow up, and handle your biz!!!! And keep the mumms simple like "I was thinkin' of gettin' my clit pierced, but I work at a magnet factory....Should I.....A)Get the piercing and invest in some bungee cords.....or B) Just do what I always do and rub my clit with my keychain...". Just makes Fubar a better place, don't you agree? But hey, that's just my opinion.........my word ain't law.........

1. You actually feel sad that you're not at home alone on a Friday night, watching TV. 2. You don't consider yourself shallow, but you can't help but think, "I can't be caught dead being seen with this ugly mothafucka!" 3. If it wasn't for the excessive alcoholic drinks, you don't know how you would've survived the night. 4. You swear that was the longest, most excrutiating night of your life, but you get home BEFORE 11:30 pm. 5. You would pay attention more to the conversation if your date didn't have something green wedged in his teeth. 6. Your date takes you to one of "their" spots, and you don't say more than three words on the date. And funny thing, they don't even notice. 7. You've actually contemplated more than once about calling some of your friends to come and beat up your date. 8. The fact they threw up on your shoes IS NOT the worst part of the date. 9. You actually make plans to move, because you can't stand the thought that they actually know where you live. 10. The only positive part of your date is that your meal actually came with a toy. 11. The thought of kissing your date makes you puke up a lil in your mouth :|. 12. At the end of the date, you still don't know that much about them, but you know a SHITLOAD about their ex's. 13. Watching others on actual good dates around you has put you into a deep depression. 14. You try your hardest NOT to be funny, because your date's laugh is way, way, WAY TOO WEIRD AND ANNOYING to EVER be heard again. EVER. 15. You actually try to fake an illness that you scientifically CAN NOT be afflicted with (i.e. a man with severe menstrual cramps, a woman with testicular swelling, a dark-skinned black man with sunburn). 16. You find yourself in a conversation with your date, and have stumbled onto a very AWKWARD topic, but your date stays on that topic for the next 30 minutes. 17. You look back in your past and think of anybody you may have done wrong, and wonder, "Is this just bad karma, or is God just fuckin' with me?" 18. The day after your date, your phone rings, and you see their phone number on the caller ID, you actually RUN AWAY AND HIDE FROM THE PHONE. 19. You chalk up the whole night as your GOOD DEED of the day.

Observations On Our Health...... Nowadays, we are being ransacked with TV commercials about some drug to help you with depression, diarrhea, constipation, restlessness, migraines, male-pattern baldness, allergies, procrastination, fear, acne, obesity, incontinence, and yes.....we have about 10 types of pills that keep your dick hard for over 20 hours (ouch : | ). And yes, there are some of us that need some medical or pharmaceutical treatment for the things that ail us. But what I see now, is that the world is taking drugs to eliminate SIMPLE DISCOMFORT! Being uncomfortable is a part of life. Having heartburn is a part of life. Not being able to sleep somedays is a part of life. However, you body is trying to tell you something. Whatever you did, or ate is not agreeing with you, and you need to deal with that issue, or feel continued discomfort. A very small percent have chronic heartburn from some genetic abnormality. A LARGE PERCENT OF CHRONIC HEARTBURN SUFFERERS EAT A LOT OF NASTY, UNHEALTHY SHIT! A small percentage of us have sleepless nights because of some brain disorder. A LARGE PERCENT OF US SUFFER FROM SLEEP DEPRIVATION BECAUSE WHEN INGEST POUNDS OF SUGAR, VISIT STARBUCKS 3 TIMES A DAY, TRY TO CRAM FOR TESTS AND EXAMS AT THE LAST MINUTE, AND TRY TO SLEEP AS THE SUN IS UP AND BIRDS ARE CHIRPING THEIR ASSES OFF! Now, every child has OCD, or ADD, or ADHD, or some type of fucking disorder. Or so many of the kids nowadays have "special needs". Well, not paying attention all the time, or being hyper, or as I would redefine it....BEING A KID....doesn't need medication! And if your child has "special needs", that should be addressed and taken care of IN THE HOME more than it is dropped in the laps of teachers and educators. I am willing to bet that over 90% of kids on any type of drug to curb hyperactivity or some classified "disorder", DO NOT NEED ANY DRUGS! There is only one sickness that is spreading like wildfire, and that is the sickness that prevents us to take responsibility or accountability for our actions. If you go to "All You Can Eat Extra Spicy Wing NIght" on Tuesdays, and inexplicably complain about the pain, bloating, and eyewatering gas you have on Wednesday, it's obvious you're not taking care of yourself like you should. If you eat BLOCKS of colby cheese as a "snack", and your bowels ain't moved in weeks, take your sluggish ass to the produce secion and get some FIBER in your off-balanced diet. If you're under the age of 30, and you have more fingers than teeth, however, you never miss your local church's weekly "Saltwater Taffy Giveaway", you have no sensible basis to complain about toothaches. Now don't get me wrong, one of my favorite foods chicken and rice SMOTHERED in rich gravy. But I have the decency to let friends know that 1. I just finished off a plate or two, 2. Not to go into the bathroom after I went until you let at least 20 minutes pass, 3. The reason I duck outside every 3 minutes is for the safety for anybody inside, and 4. I will definitely hit the gym tomorrow, because only hard work and sweat is gonna get that meal off my love handles. It's a whole lot cheaper to change somethings we do to correct some of the "discomforts" we have in our life. However, it takes true effort and work to do that. It's easy to pop a pill and dismiss all accountability of our actions, but does it really help us in the long run? But hey, this is just my opinion........my word ain't law.....

1. "About Me" sections that go on and on about how this particular person doesn't rate just to rate, and won't return a rate even if they're given one, but in their status box it says, R/F/A please, will RTF? .........WTF? 2. People who get a blast and say, "Hey everybody! Stop on by and show me some luv!!", but their profile is "friend only" accessible........WTF? 3. People who write bulletins, blogs, and what not complaining about all the individuals who beg and "whore" themselves out for a VIP, Bling-pak, or Happy Hour, but the next day, have in their status box, "Someone buy me an Elmo Bling plz!!"......WTF? 4. People in your shoutbox who start and maintain conversations with just "hey", or "sup", or "nothin", or "cool". Then turn around and say, "You must not be in the mood to talk"..........WTF? 5. The morphing pictures, where the actual person's image morphs into a celebrity or anime cartoon figure that looks NOTHING LIKE the actual person it morphed into......WTF? 6. The women who hit on me and ask for my phone number, and tell me how "hot" I am, but only have 1 profile picture, and it's a picture of an animal..........WTF? 7. The guys who buy women on here VIPs, Happy Hours, Bling, and Blasts, and act like they're husband and wife now. And get mad and jealous when said women visit other guys profiles and leave comments and what-not, just because you bought her a monkey with a jet pack.........WTF? 8. The people who actually start and fight out "lounge wars". Like it's some Crips vs. Bloods type shit. "You're a member of "so-and-so's lounge? Well then it's on mothafucka!!! DJ Need-a-Tune's all up on yo ass!!!"..........WTF? 9. People who talk to me in lounges, the shoutbox, through profile comments, or private messages who actually feel obligated to speak in ebonics or broken english to talk to me. YOU AIN'T HOOD!!!! You don't have to lie to kick it........WTF? 10. Women who have names like "DIKLUVR" or "HornyasIwannabe", or a great one in "JuicyWetSunshineThighs" who turn around and put in their status box, "Men are soooo perverted!!".........WTF? 11. People who keep asking me personal questions about me and what I do, but then say "You're lying", or "Yeah right", or "Whatever". If you don't believe me, why do y'all keep asking the same damn questions?..........WTF? 12. Women who ask me to "stop by" when I roll thru their "town". It's a JOB!!! Not a sight-seeing road trip. Besides, a man driving a big rig pulling a 53 foot trailer can't "stop by" much of ANYTHING!!!..........WTF? 13. The people who take this WAY TOO SERIOUSLY, and make it out to be their only social outlet in life. My status box says "stepped away". BIG DEAL!!! There are plenty of people to talk to and plenty of time-consuming things to do. You don't need to be logged on here to get social stimulation.............WTF? I have many more, but I'll end this part of the blog right here. And remember........ Hey, this is just my opinion.........my word ain't law...........

Anyone who really knows me, knows my true hatred for reality television shows. ESPECIALLY, the shows where someone (and celebrities are the worst!!) tries to "find" love by auditioning and recruiting 20-30 ill-adjusted, attention-seeking fucktards. A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila is one of them. I never saw the first season, and didn't see the second season until a friend bugged and bugged me to watch the fuckin' marathon that was on yesterday. So I did, and as I expected, it was bullshit sprinkled with fairy stardust, served on a retarded platter. 15 guys and 15 girls competing and jockeying for the attention of a Vietnamese sex kitten. And don't get me wrong, Tila would get my deep dick probe in a heartbeat, just as long as she wouldn't force me to listen to her sing. But these shows make a mockery of what a true relationship, and what "finding" love really is. And as mildly amusing as the show was, it is still one of the biggest reasons our society as a whole is falling apart. But I will say this, the season finale is one for the ages. I haven't laughed so hard in a long ass time!! So you have Bo, a high school sports coach who looks like a reject from a Kohl's catalog. The "man" that beat out all the other guys during the season. He, for the most part, was just an arrogant prick the whole time. But when he had "alone time" with Tila, he turned into the biggest sap, and she ate it all up (it all seems like bad acting, but they have to sell drama and suspense to keep people watching, eh?). And he was involved in one of the funniest "fights" in reality tv history. In a petty pissing match, he tries to match testosterone and bravado with another goofy prick, and gets headbutted and cold-cocked right on the chin, breaking his jaw, splitting his bottom gum down the middle, and leaving a nice gash on his chin that required stitches. And with all of that happening, he returned to Tila, stitches and all, to finish the "show". Pathetic lol. Then there was Krissy, a "model" (codeword for stripper), who has the juiciest booty for a white girl in reality tv history!!! But is so shallow, and so painfully annoying, it's amazing she beat out the other "women" on the show. But nonetheless, she is very easy on the eyes, and lord knows I would love to see that ass bouncing up and down on me for a few nights LOL. But back to the show, she loses every competition, rarely gets "alone time" with Tila during the whole season, but all in all, Tila falls in love wit DAT ASS!!! Both Bo and Krissy have their perspective "dates", expressing how they have fallen for the mini-vixen in a matter of 6 weeks, and we have cutaway after cutaway of Tila trying to convince the audience of how she's fallen in love with BOTH of them in that short span of time, and how it's sooooo hard to pick one of them, knowing she's gonna break someone's heart, and how heartbreaking it is for her. Now the twist comes!! Most "love" shows have both final contestants standoff, and the main "love thang" giving a long, drawn-out speech about how this is the hardest decision they ever had to make (no matter what number season it is, the season finale always is the hardest decision they ever had to make LOL). But with Tila's show, she has them confront her one at a time. So Bo shows up, hops out of the limo, walks up to her, spills his heart out to her, and Tila eats it up. Smiles and giggles, holding hands, lots of awkward pauses, then Tila drops the bomb. After blowing smoke up his ass for what seems to be forever, she finally says "Your shot at love has ended". And Bo stands there, feeling about as dumb as he looks, basically speechless. He returns to the limo, rips of his "bracelet", and hops in and basically cries. Now Krissy shows up. And every time she hops out of the limo, or stands up from sitting, she has to pull down her skirt, because DAT ASS...........truly a phenomenal structure LOL. Well, the whole walk towards Tila, the speeches about how she makes her feel and blah blah blah, so Tila finally says "Krissy, you still have a shot at love. Do you accept?". And then the awkward pause and silence. Then the obligatory commercial break LOL. Then we come back to where we left off, and this time, it's KRISSY who drops the bomb, and rejects Tila's offer of a shot at "love". I FUCKIN' LOST IT LMAO!!! I couldn't stop laughing, I didn't even get to hear the explanations and part of the aftermath. I was laughing 15 minutes after the show was over LOL. I tip my hat to Tila Tequila and Big Booty Krissy for giving me a classic moment of sheer comedy and laughter. I still do believe that all reality tv shows are inheritantly evil and shallow, and that filling the airwaves with non-creative, sensationalized drama-filled bullshit will make our world a worse place. But for at least 20 minutes, Tila and MTV made this man happy with belly laughs for years to come. But hey, this is just my opinion........my word ain't law.......:P