Toga's blog: "My Thoughts"

I've always assumed that the big difference between men and women is the emotional attachment to sex. Women cannot separate the two but men have the ability. Over time this has proven not realistic in some scenarios. I've seen women who are just as non-attached and men who are very attached. Truthfully I've seen something that I would have never suspected. Now before anyone gets offended on what I'm about to say I advise you to read the whole thing before you may agree or disagree. Men and women have a totally different opinion of friendship and priorities in life as well as trust and stinginess. Women surprisingly you have failed in every category listed and before you pass judgement on me, let me explain the guys point of view to you. You may then tell me otherwise. In a guys point of view a friend maybe someone you met 10 minutes ago or someone you have known since you both were in diapers. Trust is inharently given, not earned.. It doesn't really matter if it's a boy or a girl a "real friend" never sees the difference. You will defend this person until you die, and you would stand in front of a bullet for this person, that is unless this person betrays you and looses your trust. Ladies as far as I've seen ANYONE in your life has to earn your trust.. Now let's give this an example to back up my theory cause it sounds a little shaky. Now lets say for example that you are married and one of you are friends with another married couple but your friend is of the opposite sex. Now... Your friend is having serious issues and is calling you constantly to ask your opinion on what you should do. OK here's two differences in one scenario... Now a man sees this as something their friend is trusting them with and that no matter who wants to know including their significant other they are not going to tell them what's going on.He's not lying to you he's not cheating on you he just feels it's none of your damn business to share his friends problem that they have shared with him. A woman immediately assumes there's an "item" between the male and the female and accuses them of cheating and trashes the relationship. A woman on the other hand would most likely try to tell their significant other IN DETAIL what is going on, when he really doesn't want to fucking hear it. It's your friend and he doesn't want to know what his problems are except to laugh at him later. He doesn't care about your male friend because you still come home to him every night and that insures him that you aren't going anywhere. Now ladies I know right now you are saying, well he trusts me too much. Well there's a problem isn't it... A woman needs more assurance that a man loves her than just him climbing in bed with her at night... Why??? If we wanted something else we would be there, and not with you. Period. SO now who's being stingy??? A guy inharently gives you his love, trust, and respect, yet a woman demands PROOF of this everyday??? WTF?? What did we do wrong?? Sorry if your 1st boyfriend/husband was a dick but that's not our fault. How dare you demand anything from us when we give it willfully... So there!!! lol So now please prove me wrong.

It's that feeling that you get at the bottom of your stomach. There's something that rips and tears at every fiber of your existence. All at once you're terrified, exhillerated, afraid of what might happen, and curious about "What if?" What if something happened? What if nothing happened? What if it went away? What if it was permanent? What if things went the way you had planned? What if nothing goes as planned? What if this isn't anything like I had imagined? WHAT IF? There's also the question of "Why?" Why did I choose this? Why did I do this? Why am I trying to make this something so exciting when it scares the hell out of me? Why did I take this turn? Why do I want to do this? Why is everything so twisted and confusing when all I want to do is this one simple thing? Why would this happen to me? Why did this happen to me? WHY? One more question you might want to ask is "When?" When did I get in to this? When did my fate get decided? When does everything come into focus and all of this make sense? When will I know? When will they know? When is it going to happen? When will it all be over? When should I try? WHEN? I'm not talking about drugs. I'm not talking about smoking/drinking or anything that might alter you in a false way as a person. I'm not talking about stunts, or risks that you might take in your life. It's not skydiving, cliff diving, or any X-treme sport. I'm talking about one thing and one thing only in life. It's love. God's greatest gift to man. It's also his most confusing, charritible, underappreciated, and misunderstood gift. It's all 3 questions that are listed above, and the final, most important question. is "WHO?" Who will be the one sharing this gift with you? Who wil be the one you decide to give it to? Who will in return give this gift back to you? Who will decide to express it 1st? Who will decide to say it 1st? Who decides who we love? Who wants to feel that feeling if it's been torn out of your hands, once, twice or even more times from you. Actually, that last question is simple. It's everyone. From the bum down on the corner, to the billionaire in the biggest house, with the nicest cars. Everyone needs to feel God's greatest gift in their life. It's love. It's his gift to you and me and we should Cherrish it every single moment of our existence. Don't let it pass you by, and be damn sure not to take advantage of it when you got it.

Why are us as men so stupid when we're younger?Is it lack of experience? Is it lack of Intelligence? Is it lack of Maturity? Personally I think it is all of the above. Most of us go through life one woman at a time finding little parts or little pieces of something we think we want. Whether it be the perfect body, the perfect mind, the perfect commitment, even the perfect SEX. This is the Mrs. Right Now. She is the one that you know is going to break your heart but you give it to her anyways. She is the one your mother hates and your dad shakes his head at. The one who takes a family reunion and makes sure she's the center of attention with a big emotional moment or something that embarrasses the hell out of you. She's the one who let's you know that you could never do better than her and that you would be miserable without them. Whereas after 2 weeks after breaking up, you're just fine and looking again. The Mrs. Right on the othe hand is someone that you search for you entire life... The someone that fills the gaps that you have created in your own life and understands you for you, not what they want you to be. She is that woman that will still make your jaw drop in 20 years when she does something that is so cute you never thought it possible, and in your eyes is just as beautiful as the day you met. She is the one that has been patiently waiting for you even though you didn't know it. Hell she might not even know it. But after the 1st five minutes you two are together, you interact like you have know each other your entire lives. She is your cornerstone the same as you are hers.You build from one another instead of competing with one another. It's not about who can have the most friends, or who can do the best things. You are there for one another when then the times are hard, the times are great and when the love seams like it is slipping. There may be fights, there may be squabbles, but in the end you just realize that this person is everything that you've ever wanted and needed to fullfill your life. When it comes to me, I thought I had found this a couple times in my life... I even got married at one point because I wanted to settle down so bad.... That was a mistake, becuase it ended up hurting everyone in the relationship. I was stupid and fell in love with the fact of being in love... dumb dumb dumb.... I was immature and stupid, but since I have grown to realise the truth. Overall i was impatient. Now.. 2 Years after my divorce... I'm ready to settle again.. I want that Mrs. Right for me.. not anyone else..... This time I'm not being so aggressive and I'm kinda letting life come to me, instead of me going for it.... I think I'm on the right track.. so tell me .....am I?

" The Wonder" You love being around her. Does she know it? You try to force a smile on your face whenever you see her because it makes her face light up and smile with you. It's the one simple joy in your life that makes everything else that seems to go downhill so quickly go away. Anytime you see her frown it tears through your soul and if ever there was a tear you want to attack the thing that could hurt her this bad. You've felt this way for a while now and never let it show. You hold it in because of what might happen. She is an awesome person and the best of friends. You enjoy all the time you spend with her, but this you've all seen before. You see the old cliche is that you have to be great friends with someone before you want to be with them...... OK let's go with this idea... last time you watched as they went through hell with their BF/GF's and watched them be torn apart. You helped them through the rough times and eventually got the friend that you knew back. You were there with them when one of their firends/family died and comforted them through the sorrow. You took them out on their birhday, made sure they got a Christmas gift and when they wanted to hang out you dropped anything you had planned and jumped at the opportunity. How could they not see?? Why didn't they recognise what was in front of them the entire time? If they did, why didn't they act on it? Was it you or was it because you "were to good of a friend." Now wait a minute wasn't the original statement that you should should be best friends before starting in the relationship? So what went wrong? You did everything you were supposed to. The problem was that you were living a more mature and disciplined lifestyle and trying to start a more mature relationship. They weren't ready, not you.It hurt you, but you learned someting very important. You'll never obey the lesson you learned, but you learned never to completely gie ou heart to someone when they haven't given you theirs. Like I said you'll never obey your brain but that's what you've learned. Life is full of little lessons like these, but will we ever "Learn" to not put ourselves in this position? For guys like me? No. We are a very emotional breed who's livesare full of passion. Our jobs, our hobbies, our relationships, and most of all our love. It is the most prized of all human emotions but something that we give out in handfulls. Will we ever learn? Who knows, but we will always be there for you.

But are they really? God puts us in a situation where we have to make a choice, but since he's already got our lives planned out ahead of us, how could we make the wrong decision? It may hurt A LOT and it may leave you confused, but if it's supposed to happen, it's going to. Did we really ever have a choice? I don't think so. You see it's my theory that when people feel they have no control that's when they start challenging God and Questioning whether he is real or not. Well, guess what folks, he is real, and although you may think you've made your own decision he's one step ahead of you every time lol. That's why you need to ask for guidance. The plan is already set and you need to be ready for what happens, so why not hit your knees lace your hands and get the sneak preview, like an upcoming movie, of what's ahead. It's all very simple. We're not in control. So just ride the wave stay on your board and pray there's no corry below when you come crashing down. In other words just relax. The world's not coming to an end unless God gives the command and Christ returns. Global Warming is a joke, It's the Earth tiliting on its Y-axis. Oh the Northern Ice Cap is melting, Wah!!! The Southern Ice Cap is growing! And Scientology, don't get me started. You're basing a religion on a group of books (Dyanetics) That the author admitted to being fictional lifestyle ideas!!!!!! Christmas in Hell!!(Thanks Shaiah) It was a failing religion, until Tom Cruise brought it back to life. What a joke! A great actor, but please, you're telling me if I square up and kick you in the nuts you won't feel pain? PLEASE give me that chance! But anyways that's all for now. Please leave comments if you feel I'm saying anything false.