I wear a ring on my left ring finger. A silver band. You can sort of see it peeping through in a couple of my pictures. No, I am not married. I've been divorced for 7 months and ten days. As for the previous blogs that I've written, I would like to explain a few things (especially to one specific person). I do not sleep around! In fact, the one night stand blog I wrote mainly expressed how I felt after the only two loves of my life (thus far) left me. I am a stronger woman now.
The saturday that had just passed, I wrote another blog expressing my mood at that moment. I was just sick of that day in general. It's been over for three days now... Done!
On paper I seem like such a catch. So why you ask am I still single? Yea I think I'm going to want to be with the man who wants my heart as well as everything else. Makes sense doesn't it? Yes I do deserve it and so will he. He deserves happiness as well. He is out there waiting for me to be ready. I am single now because he is not ready for me either.
I give my heart out too easily. Generally speaking, not just in the lovers term. Friends are my biggest downfall. I respect people enough to the point where I give trust first. Not in all cases, but in many. I don't want to give my body to anyone anymore. Sex is just sex. Of course it feels great, but I surely can wait for it. I hate that beginning feeling where I like a person and get close to them. Even if he is a friend of mine it still stays on my mind.
I miss being held. I miss holding someone. Doing nothing with someone feels better than doing everything alone. I miss the touch of his skin and the feel of his hairs. Soft little kisses anywhere and everywhere. I especially love the feel of his finger tips on my breast and his kiss on my neck.
Maybe I am just going on and on and pointlessly heading in a direction that is worthless. With every new person who enters my life, my life feels more empty. Each new stranger that I get close to, makes me want to push them away.
I don't really have a good conclusion to end this blog. No wise words or great quote to sum it up. Life is always unexpected. I do thank you if you read the whole thing. That was really sweet of you.
I wear a promise ring around my left ring finger. Although that generally symbolizes a promise made to another soul, in this case; it is a promise that I had made to myself. I am no longer a virgin, but I have something in me that I will save for that one soul who is seeking me. Until then, who knows? ...
