Someone's blog: "My big mouth"

What is Said What is Meant! 1- While on routine patrol... -I was in the car because the coffee shop was closed. 2- The motorist was operating his vehicle in a reckless manner -He had a bumper sticker that said "SLOW DOWN-DON'T FEED THE PIGS" 3- The accident scene and the safety of the victims prevented this officer from doing traffic control -It was raining. 4- This officer went out-of-service to obtain intelligence information from a street informant. -It was too hot to ride in the car. 5- I observed the suspect acting in a suspicious manner... -The dirt-bag let go with an "Oink" as I walked by. 6- Knowing the suspect had a criminal history... -He puked on my uniform one night... 7- The informant is of known credibility and has provided reliable information in the past... -I've got two theft cases hanging over his head... 8- While being arrested, this subject resisted being injured in the act... -He ripped my shirt and broke my new mirror sunglasses... 9- The motorist was cited for multiple traffic violations... -I wrote one citation for each swear-word he used... 10- Upon announcing my title and purpose, I heard a voice from inside the house say "Come in" so this writer entered through the door... -The rock music was so loud they wouldn't have heard Patton's army so I kicked in the door. 11- The members of the press at the scene were offered every courtesy within departmental policies... -I sent them to a nonexistent address which I called the "Command Post". 12- I gave the motorist a verbal warning for speeding... -She was a good-looking blonde who owned a liquor store and who was free after my shift was over. 13- The Chief appeared at the scene and took command... -I sent him to the same address as the reporters. 14- Further interview of the witness was impossible, due to conditions. -It was my bowling night... 15- The motorist eyes were glassy; he had slurred speech, was unsteady on his feet and smelled strongly of an alcoholic beverage. -He was howling at the moon and trying to drive the car from the back seat. 16- Using only enough force to restrain the subject... -My favorite song is "Drop-kick me Jesus Through the Goal Post of Life" 17- The defendant asked this officer's advice on how to act before the judge at his arraignment... -I told him he didn't have the balls to call the judge the same name he called me.