>Note: when you see a happy couple,
or meet a great man, but find he isn't interested
in you... do you get easily hurt and upset because
you don't have the kind of loving partnership you
know you want and deserve?
And are you getting hints that after a few failed
relationships it's not just men anymore, but that
it's YOU who's carrying the fear and pain that's
keeping you from being VULNERABLE and opening up
to the LOVE needed to create a great relationship?
You can't fake it when it comes to LOVE. It has
a way of uncovering all of your deepest fears,
feelings, and desires.
What are your deepest feelings, fears, and desires?
And how does a man react to you because of these
as he's getting to know you?
If you feel farther away than ever from getting
what you REALLY want from a relationship even
though you're trying harder...
And you recognize that it's also some of your own
thoughts and emotional patterns that are pushing
a man away...
Then check out this QUICK and EASY way to get back
to the place inside where you'll naturally draw
the right man to you right here:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/e/12833/ReadyForLove/?cid=ZV7LZZ&lid=1&ll=1
Hey Crystal,
I'm about to share a SECRET with you about how
to easily and effortlessly bring MORE ROMANCE back
into your relationship.
Wouldn't it be great if, without asking for
it... the man in your life just wanted to do the
things that make you feel the most loved and
appreciated?
Keep reading to discover how to create this
great situation for yourself and the man in your
life.
What I'm going to share with you about men and
what grabs a man's deeper interests and attention
is probably going to surprise you.
Let's start here...
Did you know that there's ONE SIMPLE THING you
can do with a man to "spark" the passionate,
curious, and loving side of him with you?
The thing is... I've spent years studying all
the things that lead up to and help create a real,
loving, lasting relationship between a man and a
woman.
I've observed at hundreds, even thousands
of couples, and taken a look at what the things
are that draw a good man into that loving and
COMMITTED place in his heart and mind with the
right woman.
And I've seen what women want and need to feel
safe, secure, and happy with a man on a physical
and EMOTIONAL level... and how a women can best
ask for and share these things with a man.
And with all this... there's one thing I always
come back to as one of the most important ideas
because I hear about it everyday from women I know
or who email me:
Most women feel very uncomfortable in that
UNCERTAIN stage where they're getting to know a
man and opening up to him, but there's no real
"commitment" yet.
And moving from this kind of "casual" thing,
to figuring out how to arrive in a committed
relationship with a man can be the most emotionally
difficult, vulnerable, and "dangerous" stage for
a woman.
I'm sure you know this TRANSITION STAGE I'm
talking about... where you've been dating a guy
for a few weeks or months and getting to know all
kinds of great things about him.
And then one day you realize that, without even
knowing how it happened or choosing to do so, you
are DEEPLY ATTACHED to this man on an EMOTIONAL
level... and it's no longer some casual thing for
you where you're "dating" this guy.
Suddenly this man is everything to you.
It's this moment in the relationship where you
realize that something needs to happen, and
something needs to CHANGE in order for you to feel
100% secure and happy.
At the very least you need to PROTECT YOURSELF
and know where he sees this going and if you should
leave your heart open to him.
If you take a moment to think about it, this
moment is where all the RISK is... because it's
where your relationship will either come together
and grow, or fall apart.
Not coincidentally, it's during this risky and
uncertain time between a man and a woman where
"the wheels come off" for lots of women and they
do and say things that not only DON'T HELP create
the relationship they want... but make things
unravel.
Well, that's what I want to talk to you about.
If you want to know exactly how to move through
this "casual" stage with this man into a deeply
loving and committed lasting relationship...
And you'd like to know how to do this without
having to go through all the RESISTANCE and
UNCERTAINTY that comes up when you talk to the man
you're with about helping your relationship GROW...
then you need to check this out:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/e/12833/FCTC/?cid=ZV7LZZ&lid=2&ll=1
Ok, back to it.
There's one simple idea or "strategy" I'm going
to share with you that is the single most powerful
and effective way FAST FORWARD to a better place
in your love-life... no matter where you're at.
A place where you'll feel much more comfortable,
secure, and "in control" of where your heart ends
up... and therefore you'll have an easier time
doing the positive and "opening" things that will
create the relationship you want with a man.
Plus, as an added benefit, this strategy will
lead you to "naturally" avoid the common mistakes
so many other women make when it comes to getting
more love, more passion and more fulfillment out
of their relationships and life.
So here we go.
First, I'm going to show you the biggest mistake
you're probably making right now if you're trying
to turn around your relationship...
This mistake is an entire "strategy" itself that
women use UNCONSCIOUSLY with the man in their life.
I want to help make sure you avoid this failed
strategy - as it only has you WORKING HARDER to
PUSH A MAN AWAY.
THE "I'LL TEACH HIM TO LOVE ME" LOVE STRATEGY
Let me ask you an important question...
Have you ever noticed yourself trying to
teach a man how to love and be with you, and how
to have a "real" relationship?
You know what I'm talking about.
If you're like lots of women, then you do this
when the guy you're with starts to take you for
granted after the initial "honeymoon" phase is
over.
That "magic spark" starts to feel like it's
fading, and it seems like your man just doesn't
think about what it is you want, or how a
relationship is supposed to keep growing and
stay alive and well.
So you sit down one night and talk to him about
it. You give him examples of the kinds of things
he USED to do that he hasn't done in a long time.
Like plan special dates, buy you flowers, have
deep, long talks into the night...
The next day you get a dozen roses delivered
to your desk, and they're from him.
Ok. That's nice... but c'mon.
Getting that bouquet of roses delivered to
your office doesn't really feel so spectacular
if you JUST had a discussion the night before
about how you wish he were more ROMANTIC... and
how you miss the little surprises.
It's like you had placed an order, and he
delivered on it.
Not much romance here, huh?
And for some funny weird reason, getting what
you wanted doesn't feel the same since you had
to ask for it.
It's like the magic is gone, right?
I've felt this one myself as a man.
I get it.
As a woman, here's the important thing to
think about and notice about what you usually do
with a man...
How do you go about showing a man how to
be a better lover and partner to you if he
doesn't "get it" on his own?
And how do you do this without having to spell
it out for him and ruining the good feelings that
come from "unexpected" and more genuine gestures?
Here's the "usual" approach I see women take.
They end up trying to teach men, who don't
get it, the absolute basics about loving, being
a good partner and about how to have a good
relationship.
To show you exactly what I'm talking about,
I'll tell you a short story.
It goes like this:
A man and woman have been seeing each other
for awhile and they've both grown pretty close.
Things are starting to slowly get "serious".
It feels comfortable and natural.
But there's something else going on for the
woman here...
Something that she hasn't mentioned, but it's
bugging her and lurking in the back of her mind.
She's never really had "the talk" or anything
like it with her guy, so she's NOT EXACTLY SURE
where things are at and what everything means.
And as her feelings are growing she's starting
to feel something awful inside-
She's starting to feel VULNERABLE and UNCERTAIN.
Not knowing exactly what's happening in the
guy's mind, and him not talking or expressing his
feelings is seriously starting to drive her CRAZY.
Her unconscious fears start to take over.
That easy and ever-present attraction,
magnetism and connection isn't there like it
used to be.
In fact, the guy is starting to withdraw
and she picks up on all kinds of weird
feelings and behaviors that she didn't see in
him before when things were fun, easy and "new"
together.
He spends a lot of time on his own hobbies
and activities without inviting her along or
planning something they can do TOGETHER.
He seems constantly preoccupied with work or
other concerns and not so interested in those
deep, revealing conversations they used to have.
And worst of all, lately they've been having
more disagreements than "connections."
He doesn't say "I love you" quite as much and
generally isn't as physically affectionate as
he used to be.
And now she's not sure what to do or how
to get things back to how things were.
So she comes up with an idea-
She wants to be the one that leads him to
understand that they DESERVE BETTER, and that
they can have a beautiful love-life together if
he listens to her, chooses her and commits to
making it work.
So she thinks that if she could just have
the chance to really TELL HIM how she FEELS ABOUT
HIM that he'd see the light, understand where
things are going wrong, and he'd come running
into her arms.
She becomes more physically affectionate
toward HIM, almost as if by touching and
caressing him she will elicit some sort of
"love response."
She tries to talk to him about how he's
feeling or if he's unhappy and why. She works
hard on being understanding and "open".
By doing all this, she hopes to be able to
teach him how to give and receive love, and give
him everything he's always wanted in a woman so
they'd be happy and in love.
End of story.
So tell me, how do you think the story turned
out for the woman?
Did her man see the light?
Did they live happily ever after?
I want you to think about this story and see
how it applies to your own life.
Are you starting to see some similarities?
Good, now let's talk about it...
UNDERSTANDING "MALE PSYCHOLOGY" AND WHAT TO DO
INSTEAD OF USING THE "I'LL TEACH HIM TO LOVE ME"
LOVE STRATEGY...
The reason I know this scenario about trying
to teach someone how to be with you so well is
because I've LIVED IT several times in my life
in relationships with women.
I'm in recovery from "I'll Teach Her To Love Me"
relationship addiction.
And, as bizarre as it seems now, I only ended
up doing this and acting this way with the women
who WEREN'T really the right ones for me, or who
weren't able to show up for the kind of connection
and relationship I was looking for.
But, that didn't keep me from trying to fit them
into the "idea" I had in my head of who I wanted
them to be...
Because of the intense feelings I was having
in the relationship, I was wrapped up in these
women and all the details of our life together.
I wanted to share love with them, and I wanted
to show them that there was a better way to share
love and to be in a relationship.
But the reality turned out to be that there
was little about the dynamics of our relationship
that really and truly worked FOR ME.
In fact, I was wasting my time and energy.
And now, looking back, it's crystal clear
what was going on-
The real trouble in these situations was that
the ATTRACTION and the CONNECTION I was feeling
seriously distorted what I could see, and
distracted me from insisting upon what I was
really after and what I valued in a relationship.
My FEELINGS and needing to be with my partner
NOW were much more important than having THE RIGHT
RELATIONSHIP I truly wanted.
And I was willing to trade my time, my energy,
and my affections to try and make the woman I was
with start acting like the right one for me so our
relationship could "work".
Instead of seeing my partner for who they were,
I was constantly comparing them to who I wanted
them to be, and I kept trying harder and harder to
change who they were and the way they acted.
Not fun... for everyone involved.
Since I've been to this place in a relationship
myself, it's been easier for me to recognize women
doing this same kind thing all the time with men.
And man-oh-man... do lots of women do it, on
lots of different levels.
Does any of this sound familiar?
What's going on here?
It's simple really.
When someone is drifting away from us, or acting
distant and in an unloving way... our first
reaction is to TIGHTEN OUR GRIP on them and pull
them towards us even harder.
We try harder by wanting to talk to them more
about what they're not doing right.
We get more intense and more frustrated each
time we don't see or receive the things we want
from them.
And we become frustrated and upset at the drop
of a hat because there's so much building up
inside of us.
And we do all this without even realizing that
we're doing it... and the negative effect it starts
to have on us AND on the person we are with.
If you care about creating a better situation
for yourself (a better relationship where a man
LISTENS and RESPONDS) then you have to simply STOP
this kind of TENSION BUILDING.
You have to STOP TIGHTENING YOUR GRIP and
start seeing things for what they are.
Then... once you can do this, then you can
finally be in the right place to get the RESULTS
that you want. (getting back the closeness)
And do to this, it usually takes doing something
completely different.
Something COUNTERINTUITIVE.
No, it's NOT by addressing the issues, fears
and shortcomings YOU FEEL and talking it through
and trying to get your partner to change for you.
This may seem like the "logical" thing to do,
but it rarely WORKS the way we want it to.
Here's where that secret strategy comes in that
I was talking about earlier.
Are you ready?
So what should you do instead if you've been
doing the guaranteed to fail "I'll Make Him Love
Me" strategy?
First, STOP TRYING.
Stop trying to show a man what he needs to do.
Stop trying to show a man how to be different.
And stop trying to let a man know how he should
think and feel.
This approach simply DOES NOT WORK.
Let me explain something that's important for
you to know...
There are two different choices you can make
when figuring out how to live your life and going
about creating the things that will make you happy:
Choice #1: You can have an EXTERNAL frame or
reference for your needs, goals, fulfillment,
emotions and direction.
Here you focus on what OTHER PEOPLE are thinking
and doing, and you most often follow the path that
other people lay out before you as your own.
Choice #2: You can have an INTERNAL frame of
reference for all the most important things in
your life.
In other words, YOU decide what you want,
how you're going to feel, what you're going to
accept and what you're not going to put up with
from other people.
Here you're going in the direction of what
you want and what you're after, and other people
are free to join you on your path.
So what's YOUR frame of reference?
Internal of external?
After talking to women and observing and
getting to know a bit about their "inner
psychology", I've found some common links.
The women that I see that are happiest and in
healthy, mature relationships with men are women
that use their own internal frame of reference
as their "emotional compass".
In other words, they have a direction and a
path that they're on, and NO MATTER WHAT a man
is doing, they keep moving in the direction of
what THEY WANT.
How many women do you know who have taken
"detours" for years with men who didn't really
want what they wanted?
But the most important part here isn't the
most obvious.
Because these women have an internal "compass",
they DON'T do something lots of other women do...
They NEVER let a man's emotional problems,
issues or shortcomings become THEIR responsibility
and burden.
Sure, they can love and support a man, but it
doesn't become their problem in life that they're
trying to solve FOR HIM.
They realize the boundaries of the situation,
and that it's ONLY the man's choice to figure it
out for himself or not.
If you're looking for the real in-depth and
easy to use answers about HOW TO COMMUNICATE and
share your feelings with a man so you can grow
closer and build that open, honest, secure
relationship you know you could have... then here's
the best resource around:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/e/12833/CommunicationSecrets/?cid=ZV7LZZ&lid=3&ll=1
Here's where I'm going with all of this...
If you stop trying to make things the way you
want them to be with a man, and start doing the
things that lead him with your own "compass",
you'll "naturally" start creating the situations
you want with THE RIGHT MAN.
I've literally seen men go from FLAKEY and
RELUCTANT with the woman in their lives to
ATTENTIVE and DESIRING of a more committed and
serious relationship almost entirely because the
woman made the critical shift to her own frame of
reference with her thinking and behavior... and
stopped living in "his world" by getting upset,
frustrated and freaked out at him.
Instead of WAITING for a man to give them
the things that they wanted the way they used
to, these women changed the situation by changing
how they RESPONDED to what wasn't working.
If they felt unhappy about their life, they
got a new job, went back to school, made some
new friends, trained for a marathon, etc.
They didn't sit around waiting for the man to
fulfill them as a person.
And they certainly didn't focus on making
their relationship more fulfilling in hopes that
it would make them FEEL BETTER about their life.
And it's at this point that something powerful
happens in the process-
The woman begins to see that she's the one
teaching the man how to think about her as a
woman and as a lover or girlfriend.
Read that again. It's important.
You, and only you, are the one who teaches a
man how to treat you.
And at this point, if you're wondering just
how you can get to that mental "frame of mind"
where you can create this kind of WHOLENESS for
yourself... WITHOUT counting on or waiting for
the man in your life to do it for you, you need
to read what I wrote about my "Ready For Love"
program.
It's a specific, in-depth program designed to
help you start on the path to TRUE TRANSFORMATION
in making you finally feel good about yourself
and your life... WITHOUT the anxiety and
frustration about what's happening with the
relationship with your man.
Go here right now and read more about it:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/e/12833/ReadyForLove/?cid=ZV7LZZ&lid=4&ll=1
So let me be absolutely clear...
Worrying about why a man acts the way he does
and trying to "fix" anything about him in order
to make yourself feel better is a WASTE OF TIME.
There's something I call the "Relationship
Balance" that I talk about in depth in my e-book.
It's the foundation for what I teach women and
how I help them see how things really work with
men when it comes to dating, love, attraction and
relationships.
I talk about the important idea of what I call
the "Relationship Balance" to spell out a detailed
"how-to" approach that will lead you and a man to
an amazingly affectionate and loving place together.
Where even the most intense situations and
conflicts can come and go without creating
uncertainty and distance in your relationship.
This is how a real, lasting, SECURE relationship
is supposed to be - in case you've forgotten, or
you haven't experienced this with a man yet.
If you haven't been able to create that kind
of stable, loving, lasting relationship with a
man that has a natural "balance" of fun, love,
affection and healthy communication and boundaries,
then it's probably time you took a look at YOUR
APPROACH to relationships.
Even not thinking you have an "approach" is
still an approach (and one that doesn't work well
at all!)
Of course, my eBook also explains the common
mistakes and "failed approached" most women make
(such as the one I mentioned earlier)... and in
my eBook I show you in detail why these mistakes
and approaches will NEVER work, what to do if
you've made any of them... and what to START DOING
instead that will bring the right man and the
right relationship to you.
So stop wondering why things aren't working,
even though you want so much to share love and
a great relationship.
The DESIRE for these is unfortunately not
enough to make a great relationship with a man
come together and last.
Go to the link below to get yourself on the
right path, with the right "skills" that are proven
to help you grow the kind of relationship you
are really looking for with a man.
It all starts with my eBook "Catch Him & Keep
Him". You can download it below and be reading it
in just a few minutes if you go here now:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/e/12833/eBook/?cid=ZV7LZZ&lid=5&ll=1
By the way, I've helped so many thousands of
women already that I'm confident my eBook will
really work for you.
That's why I'm going to let you download it
and read if for free.
Try the e-book 7 full days to decide if you
like it and want to keep it.
If not, simply let me know and you won't be
charged for anything. And you'll still get to
keep the book.
I know you'll love it, and that you'll get
real-world value and insights into men and how
to build a lasting relationship from it.
You have so much to gain in this moment of
your life if you choose to learn and grow... and
so little to lose just for trying out what could
change your love life forever.
Don't miss the growth and love you could
bring into your life.
Download my eBook and you can be reading it
in just a few minutes.
Go here and get it now:
http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/e/12833/eBook/?cid=ZV7LZZ&lid=6&ll=1
I'll talk to you again soon, and best of luck
in Life and Love.
Your Friend,
Christian Carter
