I just don't know what to do or think or say anymore.
You would think that after nearly a year together you would be able to tell each other how you feel. Not so here, apparently.
I can't shake the feeling that he stays because of convenience, more than true feelings.
I know deep down in my heart that I'm so off and wrong on this, but I hate feeling this way and need to get it off my chest.
I know how I feel, but for reasons I can't explain I can't be the first one to say it. I know he's not just here for convenience. Trust me. I'm not all that special and he's told me before that if he wasn't happy he'd leave. Period.
I'm just feeling like it's take, take, take and very little give. Hell, some days I get more attention from people on here than I do him and we freaking live together! Urgh.
Let's just say it's been a really, really, really bad day and coming home to his dog leaving presents from one end of the bedroom to the other didn't help.
I'm so frustrated and aggravated that I'm nearly in tears. I don't know how much more uncertainty and just plain crap I can deal with before I blow. I'm afraid to say anything because I know I'm just in a really bad mood and don't want to screw up the best thing that's ever happened to me.
I know a lot of why I'm feeling so down and bitchy is work related and I don't want to take it out on him. I need to find a release and I just don't know how.
I'm really beginning to understand why people become alcoholics and drug addicts. Just to escape the pain of every day life. If it wasn't for my beautiful daughter keeping me grounded, I don't think I'd have made it this long.
Thanks for listening to me bitch and any input on how to deal with this would be greatly appreciated. 
