David's blog: "Lessons learned on fubar"

Sapiosexual: of, relating to, or characterized by sexual or romantic attraction to highly intelligent people

I have been pondering the following question for the past few years: Am I a sapiosexual? I finally believe that I can answer this question with an unequivocal yes! I have been married going on 30 years and for the majority of my marriage I have just been hanging on. Never really happy nor satisfied with my partner nor the life that I have had with her. There are several reasons for this, but I find that one of the major reasons is my inabliity to have a decent conversation  with her. She does not read anything at all and her interests and mine are literally worlds apart. There is nothing that we have in common yet here we are. She is disrespectful, excessively negative and critical of everything and pretty much emotionally draining to be around. 

As I have come to grow older both physically and mentally I have come to the realization that I find a strong, independent, and intellectual woman extremely attractive. I love having an intellectual conversation with a woman and often find myself turned on by it. There is something so attractive to me about a woman who does not need me because she can hold her own in this tough world. I tend to delve into difficult topics such as cosmology, origin of life theories, evolution, abiogenesis, philosophy, etc. and I find it difficut to discuss these issues with someone who cant keep up or add to the discussion. 

My wife is the perfect example of what I am talking about here. Whenever I find a fascinating subject or make some new intellectual discovery from a book I have read or a documentary I have seen and want to share it with her I get the blank stare and she shifts the topic to some idiotic issue that has no bearing on the discussion I am trying to have with her. I tend to make jokes all the time about how much I hate stupid people but I am finding that in reality that is not a joke at all but exactly how I feel. We live in a country where basic education is free and yet we have so many people here that are less intellectual than a third grader. 

I have often heard how intellectuals in general feel lonely in a world full of idiots. Now I fully understand the sentiment behind that saying. I am married yet feel alone all the time. Every once in awhile I meet a woman at work or somewhere else who fascinates me with her intellect and charm and I feel like I have missed out on this my entire life. Is it too late for me? Am I doomed to accept that I am too old to find someone on my level or even on a higher level intellectually than myself? I don't really know, but thinking about these things is literally exhausting. I consider myself of average intelligence but I can and have held my own against theologians, philosophers, and even scientists at times. I am also always open to learning new and fascinating things about life and the world we live in. It would be nice to have someone to share those things with or who can help me discover them together. 

Thanks for reading and I look forward to hearing your opinions on this my latest rant.