So as many of you know I have not been feeling well. Also, as many of you know I recently had a most interesting reaction to some cold medicine that led to an interesting text message being sent to a friend of mine. Well, in this latest entry the story continues...sort of. This was more of a misunderstanding than it was anything else...
I woke up this morning with a throat that was rather sore. Consequentially my voice, unless I was forcing it to be normal sounded a bit like Russel Crowe's voice...sometimes a bit like James Earl Jones' voice. Anyway, skipping a few details here, I had gotten ready for work and headed out the door. I got in my truck and called the lady I love...the wonderful Mistress of Wolves. I explained to her that my voice was all sorts of bleh and that I felt like I should be telling some Roman mounted cavalry a certain thing: "If you find yourselves riding alone through green fields, do not be afraid. For you are already dead and are in Elysium." That or that I should be saying, "Simba. Simba! Stop being a little bitch and go avenge me...you pussy!"
There was a slight misunderstanding at that point. Apparently it was believed that I was seriously tripping balls right then. Which just made it that much more fun. In retrospect I realize now that I should have just played it up and had more fun with it. The End
I will leave you all with a song...some people are under the impression that "A Whole New World" from Aladdin is a pervy song. Well...re-work it and it really is...
I can show you my penis
Big and sparkling and splendid
I can make it extended
On my magic mattress ride
I can open your thighs
Rock your body like thunder
Over, sideways and under
On my magic mattress ride
A whole nude world
A new fantastic way to screw
Everyone tells me "No,"
I need a blow
So I can start my screaming
(Jasmine)
A whole nude world
My sizzling space you never knew
But when you're way down there
Engrossed in hair
Now I'm in a whole nude world with you
(Aladdin)
Now I'm in a whole nude world with you
(Jasmine)
Unbelievable size
Indescribable squealing
Leaning, bending and kneeling
At my moist and gaping thighs
A whole nude world
(Aladdin)
Don't you dare close your thighs
(Jasmine)
A hundred thousand sperm in me
(Aladdin)
Hold your breath, it gets better
(Jasmine)
I'm like a shooting star
I've come so far
I can't go back to my virginity
(Aladdin)
A whole nude world
(Jasmine)
Every thrust of your thighs
(Aladdin)
With new positions we can screw
(Jasmine)
Every moment gets wetter
(Both)
I'll lick you anywhere
Hey, I don't care
Let me share this whole nude world with you
(Aladdin)
A whole nude world
(Jasmine)
A whole nude world
(Aladdin)
That's where we'll be
(Jasmine)
That's where we'll be
(Aladdin)
A thrilling taste
(Jasmine)
Of my hot place
(Both)
To you from me!
