My life...such as it is... Blog by anjeleyes77proud pagan
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Alight ppl its offical, TODAY IS A GREAT DAY!! My brother arrived safe and sound and we have been having a blast! We havent actually been doing anything but its great to be together again! Anyway I'm going to get back to the family stuff and I'll catch up with everyone as soon as I can. much love brightest blessings

1-17-07 So I think my meds are dumbing me down...the last full blown IQ test I took I scored 133, tonight I take one (a short one, but still...) and I get :

Testriffic IQ test
I guess its a good thing I dont put much stock in IQ tests, otherwise I might be worried right now, lol... ********************************** So on 4-17 I retook my IQ test (I have been off my meds for almost 2 months) and I got the following
IQ Test Score
...this more like the results I usually get!!
TO all my dear friends: I'm sorry I have been absent the last couple days, and will be for at least a couple more. Okay I'm not really sorry, you see for the first time in 15 monthes my baby brother is coming for a visit!!!! (alright I cant really call him a baby...hes 6'6" and 25 yrs old, but anyone with a 'baby' brother knows what I mean) He gets in tomorrow afternoon and I have a million things I want to get done before he gets here. He's coming out to give me guardianship (sp?) of his daughter so that he can go into the army. I obviously have mixed feelings about this...on one hand I am so proud of him for serving our country and doing something with his life but on the other hand, Iraq, hello.... It almost seems like a cruel joke that I am seeing him after 15 long monthes only for him to be leaving again, and this time most likely leaving to end up in harms way... ANYHOW, if it takes me a day or two to get back to you please dont think I am ignoring you, I'm just busy fitting in as much time as I can with my little bro. Everyone have a great week, be good to each other and hug someone you love!! brightest blessings

My Physical Survey

Physical Appearance
Hair Colorbrown
Hieght5'9"
Glassesyes
Shoe SizeI'm not telling!!
Casual or Formalcasual
Long or Short Hairmedium
Manicured or Naturalnatural
Eye Colorbrown
Let's get Physical
Lights on or Offoff
Bed or Tablebed
Romantic or Wildwild
Risky or Saferisky
Hugs or Kisseskisses
Ears or Neckneck
Walk fast or Slowfast
Dance or Tap Foottap foot
Walk or Rideride
Stay in or Go Outgo out
Spontanious or Plannedplanned
Organized or Frazzledfrazzzled
Early or Latelate
Taken or Singletaken
High Places or Well Groundedwell grounded
Swimming or Skiingswimming
Hiking or Beach Strollhiking
Vertical or Horizontalhorizontal
Bath or Showershower
Roll-on or Sprayroll-on
Hot or Coldhot
Tongue or Lipslips
Type or Writetype
Read or Singsing
Talk or Listenlisten
One of the Gang or Outsideroutsider
Loud or Quitequiet
School or Workwork
Smoke or DrinkYES
Thanksgiving Dinner or Midnight Snackmidnight snack
Napkin or Hand Towelhand towel
Theater or Rentalsrentals
Candle lit Dinner or Pizzapizza
Passion or Crazinesscraziness
Pessimist or Optimistpessimist
Truth or Daredare
Phone Call or Online Chatphone call
Plastic or Paperpaper
Cash or Creditcash
Hot or Notnot

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What do you do when you have property taxes overdue, the mortgage due, out of state company coming and your sole support just walked out on their job? Do you cry? Do you scream? Do you just go numb and hope everything works out before youlose whats left of your mind? I dont know what the answer is...all I know is that I am scared... I understand why he walked from the job but with four kids and all the stuff that needs paying I cant say I think it was the best idea to ever happen. Someone say a prayer, 'cause its about to get rough around here...
the last puppy went to his new home today...I have mixed feelings on this. I am glad to have several fewer dogs (9 total was just too much!!), yet I am sad (they really were adorable little gals). And I had to find homes for two of the bigger dogs, another mixed set of emotions...I dont actually care for dogs but after almost a year it was hard not to be attached... Oh well life goes on right? I'm just going to focus on the fact that I now have a two dog household and two dogs is mopre than enough for a 'cat person' Hey theres my positive, now I can get a cat! yea cats! lol, okay I think I'm done for now, back to the girls and all the joy that is morning with them...

9 lasts 1. cigarette: smoking it now 2. beverage: coffee 3. kiss: 4. hug: 10 minutes ago 5. movie seen: the ring 2 6. cd played: JoDee Messina 7. song listened to: stunning by 8 mm 8. bubble bath: a long long time ago 9. time you cried: yesterday 8 have you evers 1. dated one of your best friends: yes 2. skinny dipped: yes 3. kissed somebody and regretted it: yes 4. fallen in love: yes 5. lost someone you loved: yes 6. been depressed: yes 7. been drunk and threw up: yes 8. ran away: yes 7 states you've been to' California, Oregon, Washington, Idaho, Texas, Alabama and Wyoming 6 things you've done today 1. cooked panckaes 2. chased kids 3. cleaned house 4. noticed this list didnt have a number 4 5. played on CT 6. smoked ciggs. 5 favorite things in no order 1. my kids 2. the color purple 3. butterflies 4. Clifornia 5. Vodka 4 people you last talked to 1. Frank 2. Hunter 3. Kitty 4. Domino 3 wishes 1. Go back to California 2. have more money 3. get more sleep 2 things you want to be when you grow up 1. I'm not growing up!!! 2. 1 thing you regret 1. I dont want to talk about it

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I'm sorry I havent been on at all today...the girls and I were out playing and doing gardening before I went to 'group' For those that are confused I go to a group therapy setion every thursday to work on regulating my emotional responses to the world...BPD is a bitch but I try not to be, lol... Anyway... Today I hate therapy, even group sucks...I dont want to think about the parts of me that are hidden from the world, they are hidden for a reason, BECAUSE I DONT WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!!! With that rant done I think I'll just say thank you to my friends for bearing with me and I promise I'll get back to commenting you soon...

Okay I had the pic up for a while but Iwant the space for other stuff...here are the pics of our new pups (well a couple of them...they didnt want to be still!) Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Hey all my CT family! Just a quick update...yes the puppies are doing great...eyes are open and they are roaming! Now I just need to find them homes...no more dogs for Torri!! (and yes that means the momma dog is getting fixed!) I am still a little wiped from my new meds but I am spending more time feeling human so this is good...I should be back to being on line and dealing with the girls and all that really soon...speaking of girls there is screaming from the kitchen so I should run... hugs to you all anjel
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