Well here's how things are going. I hate my social life. It sucks ass. I'm so damn stupid and niave when it comes to men. I don't know what the hell I even bother. I thought that I would have something with this guy that I met on hot or not about 6 months ago. But that got busted. I've gone to see him twice and yet he has not come to see me. That's my luck. He says he wants to be with me and all that, but he does not put out any effort to make it work. I give up.
I met this other guy that's in the military about a few months ago, I think... He's a really nice guy. I thought that me and him could be together both on here and once he came home in a few months. I was yet wrong again. I was stupid enough to actually start falling in love with him. Then I get the news today that he's torn and didn't want to lose me. Well, I still want to meet him and if things go alright, I'd like to be with him, that is, if he would still want to.
I have others that have tried to tell me that I shouldn't worry with what's going on and just live my life. I think that I will. I have 2 loves in my life that nothing and no one will ever take away from me or come between us. They are my children. They are my world. Some people can't seem to understand that and that's why i'm giving up on love. No one wants to love me, but yet they want to be with me. To be with me, you should love me. I have nothing to offer anyone, but a good heart. I know that some think that I'm full of shit. You just know a part of me. You don't know the "real" me. I hurt. I want to be loved. I care about people. I'm not a total asshole. Anyways, if you find this moving or that I'm a fucking nut, please leave a comment. I need to know what I should do. I can't seem to figure it out for myself. I need guidance. I need love. I need understanding.
