what is wrong with me why can i not stop loving him as everyone says i should? why am i still not out of love? but just as inlove with him as i ever was? i know all the reasons i shouldn't so why dont those seem to matter? towards the end he earned me finally learning to hate to be honest even before the end.. the last 2 years of us was a living hell he was cruel he treated me as nothing more then a whore he used my love and sexuality as a weapon against me how many times i heard i dont love you till i went to walk out the door then suddenly it was i love you i need you every time i let go he pulled me right back in as soon as i was there hed break my heart all over again and tell me he didnt want me i knew i had to leave long before i did so if i know it was the right choice and i dont want it back why am i as inlove love with as i always was? why is it still only his hand on my skin i dream of why is his lips the only the ones i dream of? why till this day is it his name escapes my lips as i give myself release? why does he still whisper i love you in my dreams and its his arms i have to imagine around me everynight to even manage to fall asleep?
