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The 28th will be 2 months since mom passed. I don't know what's wrong with me. Half the time I seem to be alright, the other half I feel like I'm in some horrible B-Movie flick. The dreams are the worst. Last night I dreamed that I went to my mom and dad's apartment (he just moved from there on Sunday) and when I walked in she was sitting at the table. She smiled at me and I felt like my heart was going to explode from my chest. I didn't know what was going on.
I looked from my dad to my mom and waited for an explaination. My dad said, they made a mistake, mom didn't die. She's fine. They were able to save her. They didn't want to give us false hope until they knew for sure she was going to be ok. Instead they made us think she had died. In the dream, I was livid. I was so angry. It made no sense. Why would he have gone through everything we had gone through if that were true.
Then I looked around the apartment. There were boxes everywhere. They were moving and hadn't planned on telling anyone. They said they couldn't stay because everyone thought mom was gone. So they were moving to begin over. I wanted to ask my mom what she was thinking but she just said that she loved me and it'll all work out, I wasn't to worry. Me not worrying would be easier to say global warming was going to end immediately.
Then I woke up.
