Ok now I really have to wonder if it's just me, that I have a really bad case of weirdo attraction or what. Read and you tell me.
So there I am yesterday moring, drinking my coffee mindin my business and there a knock on the door. I go answer it in my oh so attractive just got up look ( messy hair sweats cup of coffee) and there he is the man of my dreams......
Ok, no not really it was the maintenance man there to replace my cracked toliet tank.
I say hello let him,the usual polite thing. this guy looks me up an down in my lovely outfit in my LIVING ROOM no less and remarks how hot he thinks I am! ( hot???? dude wtf??? I just got up and your in my living room holding a toliet for fucks sake!)
He proceeds to install said toliet, all the while asking me questions making small talk and making it impossible to ignore him, all the while making compliments in my direction, nothing too weird but leaving me with a wtf general feeling.
Then........ IT happened.
IT!
Ok cool the dude is lonely or too friendly or maybe is trying to be nice but what came next is NOT in my book on any list of how to impress women or get a date ( if this was his intention)
He stands looks at me adjusts his pants, blissfully covering the awesome plumbers crack he mustered up while installing said new toliet......picks up the toliet seat he had removed, looked at it and says.......
" Wow your really pretty and nice, I'm not supposed to do this but what the hell.I'm gonna give you a BRAND NEW TOLIET SEAT TOO!!!
(yay me!!!????)
WTF?
Is this some kinda weirdo maintenance man pick up line? Is this how he scores dates?
Am I reduced to my womanly wiles scoring toliet seats?
AAACCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK.
Do I laugh smile vomit or cringe?
( I said thanks and the promptly fled to the safety of my bedroom)
After much dwelling, I decided that this appeals to my sick sense of humor after all.
On on bright note, when my other half got home, I did have the extreme enjoyment of informing him that I was indeed so hot I scored us a BRAND NEW TOLIET SEAT YAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!
The look on his face was priceless.
He spent the rest of the evening marvelling at my "Im so hot I score toliet seats hottiness"....like a good man should.
Oy.
