To: S. Claus
From: Me
Sir,
It is quite apparent that you give no credence to the behavior of an individual. In point of fact, I have come to the conclusion that you are nothing more than a half-assed incompetent idiot.
Since you could not even follow through on a few simple requests, I have decided that by Christmas Eve of next year to find some way to take control of the world air defense grid so that as soon as you are picked up on radar, I will have the capability to fry you and your reindeer.
Once shot down, I will then make every effort to see you are prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law under the Homeland Security Regulations, and under the more recent terrorist law. Considering how vague the law is, it should be no problem to get a conviction and a sentence of life in prison plus one day. Considering that clearly you are an immortal, that will be a long time.
How much trouble would it have been to deliver the machine tools necessary to build and maintain a few simple weapons, and a woman to love me? I mean I did drop the request from the last 36 playboy playmates.
Sincerely,
Your worst nightmare
