Annelid's blog: "Ramblings,thoughts and assorted stuff"

So where to begin or rather, where to end? The end is now. I have totally given up, in every aspect of my so called life.

I don't care anymore about the pursuit of love,work, relationships, friends, pretty much anything. It's all pointless, fleeting things. Word are words. Actions speak louder than words, as it was written before...words are trivial, meaningless. At my age I've seen and pretty much done it all. And I'm tired...tired of trying. Trying leads to failure, the only lesson learned from it is...don't try it again. And I won't. Lesson learned comrade commisar.

I figured I'd use Fubar in the quest to find someone. I did, but that didn't pan out too well. I'm sorry that I failed you. But then again you know what you were getting into when you met me, read about me, etc.  I suppose there should have been a disclaimer....run away while you still can.

My heart still aches, when I look at pictures of you. When I see you online. When I think of just anything you did...your laugh, the way you'd lay in bed with the meows all around you.  But that was then...this is now...your there , I'm nowhere.

So now what? There is no what...no doing, no going, no nothing. I'm utterly broke,I have no job prospects.  I have no future, nary a past.

I dream, dreams cost nothing. That's all I have. But why bother dreaming? Dreams are what the heart desires but reality comes into play. You awake, you have nothing. And like life going full circle, you start with nothing , you end up with nothing.

This confession has meant nothing.