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relliK's blog: "Alone"

created on 09/22/2008  |  http://fubar.com/alone/b247204  |  1 followers

The Unicorn's Ride

Over your rainbow A unicorn flew, He was sent to find me... He said by you. "Climb aboard", he whispered, "We must go for a ride..." And into a portal of light We rode inside. The sky was so blue, The fields so green, With each explosion of light Was a wonderful scene. So happy we seem And always together, There was no end to your dream, It just went on forever. Then the unicorn said "I have one more surprise..." So we took off quickly And pierced the sky. Then I saw you sleeping And dreaming in your bed... I caressed your hair gently And kissed you on your head. The unicorn interrupted... "I must now get you home, But now that you've seen her dream, May you never feel alone." My heart is feeling heavy, A fire burns inside. Thank you so much my darling For the unicorn's ride.

Beauty

Your lips, your eyes, your soul Are like a work of art, The most creative thing of all Is your beautiful heart. If you were a painting, No colors could express The beauty deep inside you, A rainbow, nothing less. If you were a sculpture The clay could hardly make Your figure of an angel Without one mistake. If you were a euphony No choir could really sing All the beautiful music Your eyes could possibly bring. So here I am, an artist, With inspiration beyond belief But to capture such rare beauty, I'd have to be a thief.

A Simple Poem

Your love, if it were, my very own, If I could win, your heart, as mine, to hold, I would treasure it, like Midas did gold. I would, cherish it, like a king, his throne. I'd show you love, like you've never been shown. Our love, it'd read, like a fairy tale told, Ever new and it would never get old. Itd be, the greatest love, that man has known, And if you were mine, bliss, evr would abound, Angels would sing, Choruses, for our love. The stars, they would all, align, in the sky, Because, with us, love, had, truly, been found, And it, they would, simply, be in awe of. All these things, we could make real, you and I.

ABC Poem

Aimlessly wandering among the ghosts of friends, Blundering through traffic like demented cattle, Concerts of tuneless arpeggios Demand the sincerity of a deaf crowd, Ears of deception and platitude Force the accursed, asinine music upon me. Grasping the hands of the forgotten, I speak: Hypocrisy is not a lesson for the hot-tempered. Innuendos of fallacy line the hallways of their youth, Jars dusty with memories of the phantoms of nonsense, Kept upon their deathbeds Left disenchanted in the middle of the herd, Making their way across the lawn, Nomads of eternity, forever invading each others sanity On and on they blather, while I watch Photographs of perverts eye my movement greedily, Quaking in their silver cobwebbed frames Reminiscing silences and loneliness Stillness is a fond memory, wispy and faint. Trembling, I spin hesitantly in the rainfall; Umbrellas pop open around me like blossoms. Vanquished shackles take my place in the crowd. Wide-eyed, I revel in the glorious freedom, X-rays of lightheadedness, intoxicated on the chemical fumes of pharmacy. Yet priced steep at insanitys doorstep, the passion fades, Zoloft numbing the pain: Im free, but alone terribly alone in my elation.

Highway 109

A drunk man in an Oldsmobile they said had run the light that caused the six-car pileup on 109 that night. When broken bodies lay about and blood was everywhere, the sirens screamed out elegies, for death was in the air. A mother, trapped inside her car, was heard above the noise; her plaintive plea near split the air: "Oh, God, please spare my boys!" She fought to loose her pinioned hands; she struggled to get free, but mangled metal held her fast in grim captivity. Her frightened eyes then focused on where the back seat once had been, but all she saw was broken glass and two children’s seats crushed in. Her twins were nowhere to be seen; she did not hear them cry, and then she prayed they’d been thrown free, "Oh, God, don’t let them die!" Then firemen came and cut her loose, but when they searched the back, they found therein no little boys, but the seat belts were intact. They thought the woman had gone mad and was traveling alone, but when they turned to question her, they discovered she was gone. Policemen saw her running wild and screaming above the noise in beseeching supplication, "Please help me find my boys! They’re four years old and wear blue shirts; their jeans are blue to match." One cop spoke up, "They’re in my car, and they don’t have a scratch. They said their daddy put them there and gave them each a cone, then told them both to wait for Mom to come and take them home. I’ve searched the area high and low, but I can’t find their dad. He must have fled the scene, I guess, and that is very bad." The mother hugged the twins and said, while wiping at a tear, "He could not flee the scene, you see, for he’s been dead a year." The cop just looked confused and asked, "Now, how can that be true?" The boys said, "Mommy, Daddy came and left a kiss for you. He told us not to worry and that you would be all right, and then he put us in this car with the pretty, flashing light. We wanted him to stay with us, because we miss him so, but Mommy, he just hugged us tight and said he had to go. He said someday we’d understand and told us not to fuss, and he said to tell you, Mommy, he’s watching over us." The mother knew without a doubt that what they spoke was true, for she recalled their dad’s last words, "I will watch over you." The firemen’s notes could not explain the twisted, mangled car, and how the three of them escaped without a single scar. But on the cop’s report was scribed, in print so very fine, An angel walked the beat tonight on Highway 109.

Alone

As I sit and ponder through the darkness, I think of memories past and how they reflect me now. Some are a glorious splender while others are of torture and sorrow. What lies in the future for us? Will we grow old or be reincarnated back to our youth to start over? Though I cherish many thoughts, some end up causing me to hold back a tear. We are simply gears to this machine known as life, once we're used up, we just get tossed aside. But what happens if the gears after our time are completely used up? Do we get another chance to keep the machine running? I can't help to think this way because we all live in a society where everybody is doing the right thing for the wrong reasons, but who's to say whats right anymore? Sure, I'm not ashamed to admit when I'm wrong, but I've done the math inside and I've come to the conclusion that 92% of the time...I'm right, but at what cost? Sure this world isn't perfect, thats why I believe with time, this world could be flawless in every way imaginable to the human eye. I am forced to give up everything because deep down inside, I've lost hope and have been on a quest to find it. In 2003, I had it all....I had friends, I had a girlfriend who supported everything I've done, I had dreams of becoming a film writer and an author, I literally owned everything anybody could ask for, but in a blink of an eye it was tragically lost in a gulf of flames. I was actually pronounced dead by the local papers because I wasn't in my home when it went up in smoke. Where was I? Well I was contiplating on suicide because even though I had everything, The reality was...I had nothing. All the friends I had were just meer mirages of what my life should've been but never had. In 2004 I decided to move to Nashville Tennessee in hopes of escaping my nightmares...but in doing so came with a hefty price. It was like my old life all over again....The friends, the girl, the dreams...all haunting me. I again began to think what life would be like without me in it. From 2004-2005 I turned to drugs for the 5th time in my life, and this time the nightmares were secluded until the drugs wore off and then I became so paranoid, That I dropped everything and went into a deep dark seclusion away from the world. At that point I hated everything and everyone because I knew society wouldn't accept me as I was. For awhile I was known as a "monster" or "a demon" because it was like I HAD to be evolved with people just to disguise how I truly felt from within which explains why I'm so quiet in person, yet outspoken on here. I now serve my time as an outcast, a loner if you will....just roaming around in search of a better life, one with meaning. I have no purpose here except to assure you that all is not well with me from certain points. I was never really a family person since there is nothing there for me except fake emotions about "being a good son" or "being there when family is needed most", as if I'm supposed to be depended on. I'll never really know what family truly is since I can't have a family of my own...you see, I can't "create" a family because of all of the stress I've been through. Many attempts with no results...thats my life story. I've tried to settle down and kick back, but whats the use? Anymore it's nothing but work, and just when your about to finally catch a break...back to work before you ask any questions. Don't get me wrong...I believe in god, but if he truly exists among us, why is he ignoring my cries for help? Where was he when my house went up in flames? Where was he when I needed that extra hand in pursuing the only two dreams I had? Where was he when I lost the girl? Where was he when I called out to him loudly in my room as I blacked out from the hysteria from all of the stress? So here I am years later...no longer consumed with drugs, no longer an alcoholic, no longer a tobacco smoker....Yet pondering again, but this time, it's not suicide....this time it's not about my problems....this time it's not about my dreams or my stress or even the girl. This time I'm pondering about whats left instead of whats next. I no longer have pride, I no longer have a positive outlook on life like I used to have, I no longer have the drugs that sedated my every outburst whether it was offensive or truthful. All I have left is me..........Alone.
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