The threads of sanity start to shred with the absence of need and comfort within. Time starts to bend , twist and contort into something sick and demented. Happy thoughts no longer hold me in joyous sway as my world starts to slowly crumble and faulter all around me. I know I am loved and special to some but most of them never speak those words to me. I feel like a prisoner in my own home when the repetitiveness starts to overtake me everyday. I want to whisper in his ear care and need him so very much that it hurts but the other part of me screams in defiance that I am a fool if I do. Maybe I will just wait and see if things will change of their own accord, keeping me from going insane.
This sickness is consuming and terrifying to my soul. I try to breath but only choke on the oily slick putrid foulness of it. Words are empty without a promise to back. I am at a stalemate without a completion of my circle. I feel like a puppet on a string of fiery chains. Sharpened hooks dig deep into my heart to rip away the flesh. Not sure of love in this darkest hour that holds no real truth. Is the dream I wanted so far away and just out of my reach? I hear not your words of encouragement in my soul anymore.
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