Purrrsephone's blog: "Camp Walrus Knees"

So this is my response to THIS PIC by my homeslice DAWDJ...I felt that at least one of these songs needed to actually exist, so...here you have it, in all its terrifying glory!

A long, long time ago
I can still remember
How it felt to have my name dark green
And I knew I could have my fun
That I could get past Level 1
And, maybe, find what FUBAR really means

But no salute, it held me back
Uploaded, then got back on track
Getting approved, it sucked chode
And what the fuck's a "God Mode?"

I can't remember how I found
Myself in FUBAR's Support Lounge
But someone said, "Some features are down,"
The day Fu's servers died
So

CHORUS:
I hate when I'm trying to rate
I'm a-singin' while I'm Blingin'
Then I look at the date
I'd send you a Pimpout
But it's probably too late
Guess the servers have decided my fate
FUBAR's servers have decided my fate

Did you write the Bible of Fu?
And do you need me to Shitface you?
I know how much you need your drinks
I do believe I'll create a lounge
With all the spare time I can scrounge
And can you teach me how to code it, do you think?

Well I know damn well that you're online
Cause you fill my Bartab up all the time
And I couldn't believe my eyes
The first time I was Altruized

I was a lonely white-text nobody
Til I picked up a Bling pack and a VIP
And it was great to be in my Family
Until the servers died
I started thinkin'

CHORUS:
I hate when I'm trying to rate
I'm a-singin' while I'm Blingin'
Then I look at the date
I'd send you a Pimpout
But it's probably too late
Guess the servers have decided my fate
FUBAR's servers have decided my fate

Now for several months I've been on my own
And my, my Friends list sure has grown
But that next Level's eluding me
I've wasted my time on cam smoking joints
But I need to raise one million points
Can I do it? That remains for us to see...

Oh, and while I SBed with your mom
A stranger left me a Cherry Bomb
I rated their page in thanks
To give their Boomer spanks

Some newbie talking awful rude
Was scrolling past stark in the nude
But his pics could not be flagged as "lewd"
Because the servers died
We started singing

CHORUS:
I hate when I'm trying to rate
I'm a-singin' while I'm Blingin'
Then I look at the date
I'd send you a Pimpout
But it's probably too late
Guess the servers have decided my fate
FUBAR's servers have decided my fate

Do you think I'm a mega-jerk
Cause I rated your Not-Safe-for-Work
And didn't rate your page at all?
But if I Mega-Polisher you
You could shine a Fu-Pony or two
And just maybe...you could really have a ball

Now I got the plugin for the tunes
And all the Smotri logins too
I was DJing in SAM
Til the broadcast ate my cam!

Uh-oh...Level 25
Angel? Demon? Pick a side
But I was ready to Fuicide
The day the servers died
It had me sayin'

CHORUS:
I hate when I'm trying to rate
I'm a-singin' while I'm Blingin'
Then I look at the date
I'd send you a Pimpout
But it's probably too late
Guess the servers have decided my fate
FUBAR's servers have decided my fate

Oh, and there we were all in one place
Pimping out at an hourly pace
To see how many Likes we'd get
So come on, get on your mouse and do it quick
Rate some of my fucking pics
Until our Abilities reset

Oh, and as I climbed to Forgotten Fu
I entered a Fu-Lotto or two
But losing really sucked
Cause I'd wasted all of my FuBucks

And as I watched my clock hit 3
My face lit up with a smile of glee
Until nothing reset for me
Because Fu's servers died
And I was singing

CHORUS:
I hate when I'm trying to rate
I'm a-singin' while I'm Blingin'
Then I look at the date
I'd send you a Pimpout
But it's probably too late
Guess the servers have decided my fate
FUBAR's servers have decided my fate

I met a redhead in my SB
And she invited me to PDP
I just smiled and clicked her link
I went scrolling down the page
Buying drinks for Zod and Rage
And saying things that made Echo blush and blink

And in the lounge the trolls were screamin'
Mama danced while "Jerk" was streamin'
But not a word was spoken
The text refresh was broken

And three staff I admire a lot
Bothered BabyJesus with all they've got
Til they could finally Pimp Hand LilBot
The day...Fu's servers...died
The lounge was singing

CHORUS:
I hate when I'm trying to rate
I'm a-singin' while I'm Blingin'
Then I look at the date
I'd send you a Pimpout
But it's probably too late
Guess the servers have decided my fate
FUBAR's servers have decided my fate

They were singing

CHORUS:
I hate when I'm trying to rate
I'm a-singin' while I'm Blingin'
Then I look at the date
I'd send you a Pimpout
But it's probably too late
Guess the servers have decided my fate
FUBAR's servers have decided my fate

Here it is, guys, the chance to win something badass and shiny!

Rules:
1. Only one entry per user
2. Entries must be in the form of a comment on this blog to be considered
3. Entries must be received by midnight Fu-time (PST...that's 3am EST) on Friday, May 13th to be considered
4. Don't be gay, Sparky (y)

Contest:
All you have to do is post a comment with the word you think sounds hilariously dirty out of context, but isn't. Like "moist"...IDK about you, but that just plain sounds filthy and wrong. But that's an example; you get nothing if you use it cause I already did! SO NYAH, bitches!
Three (3) 3rd Place winners will be given a 1 or 2 credit Bling of their choice; two (2) 2nd Place winners will be given a 3 or 4 credit Bling of their choice; and finally, one (1) Grand Prize winner will be given the Bling of their choice (under 15 credits) and a special salute! Payout happens sometime around 8am EST (5am Fu-time/PST), so get cracking bitches!

TEETS 'N KNEES!

CHORUS:
Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
I gotta show off my Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
I gotta show off my Teets 'N Knees!

1: The Captain, the Milk Man, the SLDC
Just a few friendly faces in the PDP
2: FuBulls and Hot Wings, I'm buying a round
While I'm checking out 4Chan for what can be found
1: Bright blue Speedo stretched on her hips
Holy motherfucker, get a load of those nips!
2: They're ashy, and crusty, and out in the breeze
Don't look now, it's some Walrus Knees!

CHORUS:
Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
I gotta show off my Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
I gotta show off my Teets 'N Knees!

1: FuSupport's bitchin' about my pics
We all told Thornz to SUCK OUR DICKS!
2: Had to find a default as a joke
Google Image Search nearly made me choke
1: Browsin' the fatties for someone to use
When I saw all the folds I knew I found my muse
2: She looked like a head on a pile of meat
And I loved how she showed off those ShoulderTeets!

CHORUS:
Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
I gotta show off my Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
Teets 'N Knees!
I gotta show off my Teets 'N Knees!

My lounge got SLDC
Your lounge got STDs
My lounge, hot chicks who can hang
Your lounge got more sausage than a gangbang

My lounge got Jasan Stepp from P-Dot
Don't be frontin' like your lounge got half what we got
My lounge got a DJ with a chainsaw
Your lounge got a half-nekkid grandma

My lounge, laugh at Walrus Knees
Your lounge, look at pussy cheese
My lounge, see some big ol' tis
Your lounge smells like taco shits

My lounge got a code that's sick
Your lounge looks like Bigfoot's dick
My lounge got Level 45's
Your lounge is skeevy and it gave me hives

My lounge got some pretty hot chatters
Your lounge, bitches couldn't be fatter
My lounge plays Slayer and Tool
Your lounge plays Hanson, fool

My lounge, full of red-beaver
Your lounge, fuckin' Justin Beiber
My lounge, #1 rank
Your lounge is just like your cunt is: STANK

CHORUS:
It's time that we let Fu know
How much every OTHER fuckin' lounge blows
P.D.P. is the best in the business
P.S. Cam 3 is Zod, not Jesus
It's time that we let Fu know
How much every OTHER fuckin' lounge blows
P.D.P. is the best in the business
P.S. Cam 3 is Zod, not Jesus

My lounge needs no introduction
Your lounge needs liposuction
My lounge, motherfuckin' rad
Your lounge got three members, and one's your dad

My lounge, big like a planet
Your lounge, shit...you might as well can it
My lounge, blowin' up like a grenade
Your lounge, Gay Pride parade

My lounge makes the honeys spread
Your lounge belongs in Special Ed
My lounge, smooth like velvet
Your lounge needs a fuckin' helmet

My lounge is tight, it works out
Your lounge causes vaginal drought
My lounge...an upgrade
Your lounge...Sling Blade

My lounge...ShoulderTeets
Your lounge, workin' the streets
My lounge has Schnook and Captain
Your lounge watches Oprah while it's fappin'

My lounge has ConCon's boobies
Your lounge has middle-aged newbies
My lounge spins all the best tunes
Your lounge asks Liberace to spoon

My lounge wins the Spotlight
Your lounge smells like a diaper on a hot night
My lounge...is the P.D.P.
And your lounge...ain't got shit on me!

CHORUS:
It's time that we let Fu know
How much every OTHER fuckin' lounge blows
P.D.P. is the best in the business
P.S. Cam 3 is Zod, not Jesus
It's time that we let Fu know
How much every OTHER fuckin' lounge blows
P.D.P. is the best in the business
P.S. Cam 3 is Zod, not Jesus

IDK if you heard but I got set up as a new DJ at THE MOST BADASS PLACE ON FUBAR, that's right...THE MFKN PURGATORY DANCE PARTY, baby! I wanted to let my fellow DJs know that if I'm available to pick up or I need to drop off, you might be hearing from me. If you don't have my YIM, SB me ASAP so I can give it to you and get yours.

ALSO! If any PDP regulars see this, leave me a comment with some of your personal favourite bands and artists, or some individual songs you really dig, so I can throw some crowd favourites into my rotation if I don't have them already, mmmkay? Mmmkay.

Weeeeeeeeeee! (y)

~Purrrs