bratty b a e's blog: "Writings and thoughts on D/s"

Submissive (sub) – As a sub you submit to your Dom, you give up control for long periods of time. However you have your opinions and your choices and you can still make them. Say you do the dishes and pay the bills, these things usually are still under your control. It changes only during set times and parameters. There is also the thought of the “power balance” between dominant and submissive. Meaning that in a submissive role although you give up the control the power is really still 50/50 just in a different setting and under more intense circumstances. Sex is usually a large part of this relationship and mostly where the submission enters in. Now don’t get me wrong the intensity is still strong and the punishments and pain are real and overwhelming however you have more of an option to stop and this doesn’t spill over into the everyday that much.

Slave – As a slave control is given up completely. The power balance is completely tipped in the Dominants direction. However keep in mind this is a choice the slave makes not something she/he was made to do. Slaves usually are slaves 24/7. They may work but when they get home there is no distinction from normal day to a BDSM day, that person is always a slave from the day they ask for that. As a slave sex is still very real and alive however not always the goal and not needed for the Dominant and slave to be in that persona. As a slave the lifestyle is usually more intense in pain, humiliation and just pure pleasure (It is always about pleasure.Even when it does not involve any sexual act pleasure to serve and pleasure to control is there. I would say instead that in a Master/slave relationship is easier to explore the darker desires of our soul. Talk, accept,admit,explore and find out more about fetishes and needs that usually most people are afraid to even speak off) . Something to remember however is that as a slave this does not mean if the Dominant asks you to break the law or hurt yourself that you should obey on a whim. If a Dominant is asking you to do things that are against the law or against your moral values than he or she is not a true dominant. (additionally how far the Master will go, how much He will push his slave’s limits and what practices He will use are pre-discussed, agreed and in event no matter how confident the slave is a safe word should be agreed for any situation the slave would like to stop what is going on. The more a Master and a slave are honest and open with each other the better it is to understand each others needs and what should they do at time. Honesty, communication and trust are essential and clearly time in order to progress and enjoy more such a relationship).

(This last one is something should not be practised by the unexperienced, never for long periods of time and it has nothing to do with puppy play or other similar sexual fetishes.)

Pet – This hasn’t always been a classification of a submissive person and is still controversial in some circles. A pet is more on the side of a slave except for one large difference, sex does not have to be involved. In many cases it is not. If you have become a pet it is to give up yourself and obey, you gain pleasure from the control and the obeying not from sexual play. There can be play but it is rare in this kind of lifestyle. This submission is one of the most dangerous because you can lose yourself mentally because you so rarely have thoughts of your own, you usually do not work and although you may discuss things with your Dominant he is last say in all things.

Ultimately the deeper you go into submission the stronger you have to be which of course is peculiar since you have to give up more of your control with each level. But you have to be very sure of yourself to give up every ounce of control and thought. Taking each step is serious and should never be taken light by the Dominant and submissive, especially if you want to remain safe, sane, and consensual.

This information was copied from Dungeon Master's blog and be found at http://dominationsubmission.wordpress.com/2012/12/20/the-main-types-of-submission-in-bdsm-submissive-slave-and-pet/

bae's thoughts - this was a diary post from May of 2014 that i found interesting. This would have been posted on my originial Fubar page, that has since been deleted. i felt it relevant to share it again for anyone else interested in seeing one Dominant's definition