I am feeling a bit introspective tonight, so I decided to write this after a bit of thinking.
While I doubt anyone would read it, much less comment on it, it serves it's purpose as a bit of "mental decompression" and catharsis.
I am a very stubborn person most of the time. I have my beliefs and almost nothing can make me change my mind. There is a a reason behind that, of course.
I've come to realize that I may possibly be diagnosable with obsessive-compulsive disorder. While I am not a psychologist? I think it fits.
What drives me is not anger or revenge, but immutable adherence to black/white standards. It's not cold and calculating like a murderer, it's painfully anxiety-provoking. I have lived most of my life surrounded by violence, and this became my way to cope with the horror around me.
To have done differently would have been overwhelming and traumatizing, and to this day? I continue to adhere to my own rigid standards, because breaking them could possibly make my world collapse.
That is what I feel when the security of my overly strict morality is called into question, and it creates a great deal of internal conflict, causing me to reflexively and passionately defend it.
I am not an an evil man who relishes violence or suffering, nor am I a bloodthirsty monster.
What I am is an intense, stern, stoic, harsh, passionate man who's lack of faith in my fellow man leads me to be incredibly cold, to lack any sense of compassion or empathy for criminals, liars, and traitors.
The latter being a habit of mine that is directly caused by that very lack of faith in man. Ultimately, this has been carried with me through my life and, unfortunately, left all manner of pain, despair, and destruction behind in the lives of others.
I do believe that I am a good person. However, I am misunderstood, dedicated, way too hard on myself, angry, and far too strict in my interpretation of "right" and "wrong".
I have often been accused of being arrogant. I can assure you that this is not the case at all.
My attitude stems from my total faith in the rules and code of honor that I represent, and by extension, total faith in myself.
Unfortunately for me, I am also a man who, at times, allows his faith in his principles to overwhelm me. There is no place for doubt, thought, or understanding in my world. Complacency can get you killed, and such considerations would only threaten the very fabric of the society that my morality demands.
I doubt if anyone will take the time to read this, but if you do? Now you have a rare insight into my mind.
A lot of people have seen the "Rules of Combat" list on the internet (Things like "If the enemy is in range? So are you")....
So, I decided to put together a list of my own based on my life experiences:
"The Rules of a Fistfight"
The cooler it looks in the movies, the more likely that it will get your ass kicked in real life.
Never escalate the level of violence in a fight you are losing.... You may not be the only one with a weapon.
You are not Chuck Norris. If you can't beat one opponent, you're sure as Hell not going to beat more than one at a time!
Sport fighters are NOT bound by the rules in a bar or on the street. "Survival before honor."
If you have to fight dirty to win, you'd better make damn sure it counts! ...There are very few things meaner than a guys who's been kicked in the nuts and is still standing.
If he's worth hitting once? He's worth hitting again. "Throw punches in bunches."
If you have time to block, you have time to strike. Let the other guy block, no one has ever won a fight by only blocking.
The first part of EVERY fight? "Awareness".... The best way to win a fight is to avoid it before it starts.
Black belts don't mean shit against knives or guns. Know when to walk away, or run!
Know when it's time to stop fighting and leave. It means the difference between "Self-Defense" and "Felony Assault" charges.
The people that The Punisher attacks are indeed awful people who might deserve death, but his way of making them suffer an unbelievable amount is suppose to make you wonder if he is fully justified?
With The Punisher, you already know you're basically watching a villain kill villains.
It's basically Friday the 13th, except instead of teenagers having sex, it's mobsters and rapists. There's no real point of morality coming in, he's a living engine of death who kills.... He is from the start, he is at the end. He doesn't start good, and he's never capable of redemption or turning on another path.
But given that The Punisher has never exactly been portrayed as a "paragon of justice", that's pretty shaky reasoning.... If it was Captain America or Superman torturing a helpless woman with it being presented as a good, noble thing? Then it'd be a different matter entirely. The Punisher is not a hero, nor does he claim to be. He is fully aware that he is a mass-murdering serial killer. Yes, he only targets other criminals, but he's still a complete monster himself.
It's an uncomfortable thought, and it should be uncomfortable to most people.
The concept of summarily executing bad people is something that a civilized society should be squeamish about.... But which is more uncomfortable, the fact that someone would do this or the fact that the world is so corrupted and disgusting that someone needs to do this?
This current culture of "blaming the victim" and "crime advocacy" must be stopped. Simply put, there are some people who do not deserve to live. Some people do not deserve a second chance, or the mercy of a civilized society. Their evil acts committed against society justify revoking the rights given by a civilized society.
He is called "The Punisher". Not "Justice". He's not there to fucking arrest anyone, he's not trying to deter criminals, or save anybody. He's there to punish them for wrongs committed. It's not about the future or rehabilitation, it's about the wrongs committed and balancing the scales.
Declaration of a Patriot
I am ashamed to live in a nation full of laziness and cowardice. We do not deserve this free country that such brave men fought and died to secure for us. We let our politicians regularly break our laws and we do nothing about it. They trample the Constitution from both sides of the aisle and We the People are so divided that we can only argue about which side infringes freedom less.
When it was clear a revolution was needed, nobody did anything.
Even now when the corrupt government talks about taking away our last means of self-defense against the encroaching tyranny? No one does anything but talk about how they'll fight alone, in their houses, with no other Patriot within 100 yards to hear the cry to battle and assist. Everyone will die, one by one, alone in their homes, until the Patriot culture is weeded out of society and the revisionists write us all off as conspiracy-theorists and kooks.
Everybody talks big, but nobody ever does anything. In the end, a few proud men, remembering the once-free nation given to them at birth, will die alone in their homes after a gunfight when they have refused to relinquish their rights, but they will be just a footnote in the news. Life will continue on and the true traitors will continue to stay in power.
I wish I lived in a country where Patriots actively defended against the tyranny instead of waiting for it to come to their doorstep. I wish I was a younger man and that I was even half as strong as the men and Patriots that my forefathers were. I wish we had a fighting chance.... America is dead and gone, and many people do not even realize it yet.
But all is not yet lost.
Because America was founded by tough Hell-raisers.
Rugged citizens who evaded taxes, spoke strongly against tyranny and government interference, and grew tobacco. These same Patriots grew hemp, brewed beer and distilled spirits, smuggled weapons, and were willing to fight for their rights as free men.
....And it will be saved only by those same types of citizens.
Remember this: "In the face of tyranny, revolution is our duty."
Many years ago, I swore an oath to "...defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic. So help me."
Lest I besmirch the tradition of said oath, I shall stand by my vow. May my fellow brothers and Patriots smite me where I stand if, by my hand, the blood of those in which I swore to defend is spilled upon my homeland.
“When the people fear the government there is tyranny, when the government fears the people there is liberty.” ― Thomas Jefferson
"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. ―That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness." (emphasis added by myself)
Listen well. This place is not real life, and no one gives a FUCK about your morality. Inevitably, I will be called a troll, I will be blocked or even reported by someone.... But those who have been here for a long time? You know exactly what I'm talking about.
This place is not Facebook, nor Twitter. This place is not a conversation between individuals, nor is it a "game". This is a place where no one matters, but everyone matters, and that is the beauty of it.
I come to this place to let it all out.
I come to this place to mock the humorless.
I come to this place to corrode others.
...I come to this place to let out the monster I am inside, and to get away from the fucking sheep who take life FAR too seriously.
And this is the beauty of this place. No matter how hard you throw your opinion at me, you will always lose. For an opinion formed by an anonymous, unknown source is without merit. The little rock you throw at me will pass unnoticed to the monster that I truly am.
I am not deterred, nor discouraged by your efforts to silence me. I am more than a man, I am an ideal.... I am everyone of you.
I am the voice that tells you to accelerate and hit the car that just cut you off in traffic.
I am the tightness in your chest when you didn't get that promotion at work.
I am the split-second grin on you lips when tragedy befalls someone who has wronged you.
...I am the living avatar of your humanity and your civilized society eroding into oblivion. I am a part of you, the "you" that no one wants to admit exists. The dark and cracked mirror that reflects all of your faults.
Call me "Wolf".
I shall continue forward and nothing can stop me, for to deny me would be to deny yourself.
Now go. You don't belong in this place.
Leave if you value your sanity.
This is a public statement in order to clear the air regarding any misconceptions surrounding me....
I am aware that I am viewed as a cold, heartless and savage monster by many. I am also aware that some people consider my actions to be "unpredictable" at best and "downright evil" at worst. While I make no apologies for my actions, I would offer a simple explanation to any interested in them.
I am rather infamous for my cutting sarcasm and (according to popular opinion) inappropriate comments. Bear in mind that 98% of the time, they are meant in jest and simply intended for my amusement and the amusement of others viewing them.... Unlike "certain others" on this site who shall remain unnamed? There is almost never any genuine malice in my posts.
I am also aware that, due to my often nasty comments? I am also disliked by many and considered to be a menacing, harassing and/or threatening individual. Therefore, I shall address this topic in order to make my demeanor and intent perfectly clear to all....
I want it to be known that I would only harm a person if myself or an innocent third party was being threatened. That being said, I will not allow anyone to violate my person, those I care about or my property unopposed.
If that places the aggressor in a position where they would attack me in any form or fashion? Then, so be it.... Self defense is a basic human right. It is the aggressor who set the ball rolling and not the defender.
In other words, while I will not brag, nor go into any detail regarding my knowledge, abilities or past activities? It is enough to say that when compared to the average person, I have the capability to direct vastly superior and overwhelming force against a target of my choosing with great effect.
However, I will NOT use said force except in the defense of myself or those under my care and protection. While I have the capability to utilize my skills, training and equipment to cause severe damage? I also maintain the necessary restraint to control my response to only include that which I deem to be "necessary force".
To put it more simply.... If you don't start any trouble? Then there will be no trouble.
Certainly, destroying an opponent quickly is a sound tactic. But if you want to hurt them and go on hurting them, even if you yourself are no longer there to do it? Then do this:
Take something precious to them, and give it back broken. Make them live each day with the knowledge that it can never be the same as it was, with the proof in their own hands. Let them spend their efforts to fix what is broken, only to constantly fail, even if they come very close. Let them, in their deepening frustration, finish the destruction of what they once saw as ideal, and forever change themselves in the process....
People know the most efficient ways to hurt themselves, make them do the work for you.
Many do evil to prove themselves free from the boundaries of society's morals. This is foolish. Ruthlessness and cruelty have their uses, of course. But the most dangerous warrior of all should be perceived by his most honorable opponents as decent and kind.... This is far from being decent and kind, of course! However, the most unnerving thing that one can do to one's enemies who fight you on moral grounds is to be noble.
A warrior never should show weakness to one's enemies. One can do this by covering his weaknesses with inhumanity. A person that becomes more than a flesh and blood being and transcends to a mythological horror is not something that an opponent will face rationally. Enemies will overplot themselves and reveal their presence or make mistakes in combat. Make your enemies show you how vulnerable they are.
The concept of peace is a lie. Any warrior knows this.... "Order" on the other hand is something that can be enforced. Order is obedience to the law. Civilization thrives when there is order. Human advancement and evolution rise forward through its existence. Order can only be enforced through deference to a superior authority. This can only be maintained through fear.
A warrior should not be afraid to use whatever weapons he possesses. Deception, intimidation and sheer brute force are all methods that provide easier and faster objects to achieving most goals than use of diplomacy or negotiation. Efficiency should be a warrior's first priority, not "manners".
A warrior must remember to avoid the trap that many great warriors fall into. Do not fool yourself with images of the honor and nobility of combat. One should appear incredibly strong and fearless to one's foes, but the only thing in the end that matters is victory.... Simply "victory".
There is no "Good" or "Evil", there is only "Strength" and "Weakness", the predator and the prey.... Choose which you are.
To understand one's emotion, to comprehend the source and the reason, the WHY of one's emotions is to control it.
Unlike most people who prefer to keep things at a careful medium? The successful warrior know that when you control something you can also unleash it upon your foes. It is from that control that our strength stems. Rather than becoming a savage, raging berserker, one learns to control our anger and hatred. We unleash it when our intuition tells us the time is right, and we put the leash back on when it is no longer necessary....
That is what sets a true warrior apart from the fools who rage at every minor inconvenience. The ability to harness and use one's own emotions properly to achieve results.
Power should be wielded like a storm. Others have said this time and again, but as is often the case? They miss the truth of such words.... A fool seeks to match the storm's fury, its destructive ferocity. This is most certainly the goal, but they do so in the manner of a cloudburst. Fools dwell over others and throw all manner of destruction very quickly in a reflection of the directionless anger inside them. They can never build themselves to be more. And like such storms, they quickly dissipate.
A warrior should emulate the STRUCTURE of the most powerful storms. From this, power will flow as a natural consequence. Make yourself the core, and keep your fury at arm's length. Give it direction, focus it, refine it, and make it into a devastating force that you cast about you.... Hurricanes do not wait in one place and fall upon those who are too stupid to move.
As with these great storms, one must move and cut a path upon the very face of the land. Make those you oppose remember your fury even when the sun shines bright.
Emotion is what fuels a warrior, it is the driving force of life. Fools deny their emotions, and that is why so many of them have died at my hand.... So many beings bury a part of themselves in the back of their minds. This part is their secret desires and thoughts that they try to deny. Some psychologists call this part of the mind "The Shadow."
The Shadow is the true self. It is the part of the darkness that touches us all, even beings who actively deny themselves. But even those who deny their own evil may still turn to it.... And that is why the darkness is greater, for the darkness welcomes all.
There is only one truth: What you will to be.
There is only one law: What you will to do.
There is only one power: What you will to become.
...All else is self-delusion and folly.