Over 16,530,025 people are on fubar.
What are you waiting for?
I curse the following day….November 18, 2007. Does it hold any significance for any of you? The answer for most of you, is probably not. For me it’s when I made the mistake of listening to someone and joining this horrifically mind numbing stupefying site. For someone who’s not a joiner, a follower, a “sheeple” for all intents and purposes, I bought into this hook, line and sinker. Whatever. Other than posting a few pictures and blogs, g0d willing my activities here , will be limited.
Sure, I might pop into a lounge or two, stay for a bit, exchanged pleasantries but the reality is, I’d rather not. I guess when one's social life is all dependent a ip adress you take what you can get. But like someone who’s an addict and can’t give it up cold turkey , I too can’t seem to pry myself away from the gravitational pull it has. Trust me on this, if I had a semblance of a social life, someone to talk too, someone next to me, I wouldn't be here, but yet again I keep on coming back for the proverbial cyber crotch punch. Cest' la vie.
I haven’t been totally honest with some of you . I shall explain. I’m unemployed and have been for about 2 months or so. I guess the reason I lied, is to put on a façade of not being the total looser. Do I miss working where I did? No, not really. I somewhat enjoyed what I did, for my co – workers not so much. And don’t get me started on the putz that’s was known as my supervisor. May a pox come down upon his house.
So yes, I’m unemployed. I’ve been doing the whole “let’s go online and look for work routine”. All the job websites, as well as going to agencies. The end result is the same…nothing. Looking at the new every night I’m in good company although frankly, it’s company I’d rather not keep. I’ve been trying to keep a good outlook on things. Be cheerful, be friendly, smile a lot…lies, all lies. Keep your head up! Tomorrow will be better! It won’t.
As for life in general , it blows. Imagine if you will , having no friends. That’s right…zero. Unless you count some casual words tossed back and forth online as friendship. Don’t get me wrong. Some people with whom I’ve chatted with (and you know who you are) I think or rather know are good people. Why do you have to live so damn far away! So my life is like this:
There really, REALLY, has to be more to life than this. I speak to someone very close ( personally NOT geographically) to me online. She’s fine and content staying at home and being online all the time (well not all the time but a good portion of the day) and then napping on and off. That would drive me even more bat shit insane that I already am. Not to say I like to trip the night fantastic but for g0dsakes I like to be out and about. Sometimes I walk around the block, other times I take my bicycle for a spin. Other times I just go for a drive to nowhere specific. When I get tired, I pull over and collect my thoughts. Exciting no? It’s not and I freely admit it. I have no particular destination, no special place to go to. No
There seems to be no proverbial “light at the end of the tunnel”, No catharsis, no reason really to awake from my slumber. I need a reason, a reason to continue on. A glimmer of hope perhaps, a sing that things will get better? A shred of hope? I need a reason to carry on this sham of a life.
Save me from myself.
