nInjA KittY's blog: "Stupid Stuff"

Alabama: It is illegal to flick boogers into the wind & it is illegal to chain your alligator to a fire hydrant Alaska: It is illegal for moose to have sex on city streets & Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time Arizona: You may not have more than 2 dildos in one house & Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs Arkansas: A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month & it is illegal to buy or sell blue lightbulbs California: Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited & it is illegal to eat an orange in your bathtub Colorado: It is illegal to lend your vacuum cleaner to your neighbor & it is illegal for cats to run loose without having been fit with a taillight Connecticut: You may not educate your dogs & a pickle is not officially a pickle unless it bounces Delaware: It is illegal to get married on a dare & it is illegal to sell dead people for money without a license Florida: Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal & While having sex, only the missionary position is legal Georgia: It is against the law to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole or street lamp & you have the right to commit simple battery if provoked by "fighting" words Hawaii: Coins are not to placed in one's ears & It is unlawful to annoy birds Idaho: If a police officer suspects a couple of having sex in a vehicle he MUST either honk, or flash his lights, and then wait three minutes before approaching the car & riding a merry-go-round on sundays is against the law Illinois: It is illegal to pee in your neighbors mouth & It is illegal to drink beer from a bucket while sitting on a curb Indiana: No one may catch a catfish with his bare hands & it is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public Iowa: A man with a moustache may never kiss a woman in public & after love making a man isn't allowed to take more then 3 gulps of beer while lying in bed with a female or holding her in his arms Kansas: It is illegal to hunt whales & the installation of bathtubs is illegal Kentucky: All nude people in your house must be registered with the state & It is illegal to shoot game out of the window of a moving vehicle, with the exception of a whale Louisiana: It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot the bank teller with a water pistol & It is against the law to steal even a single crawfish Maine: It is illegal to stroll down the street playing a violin & it is unlawful to tickle a womans chin with a feather Maryland: It is illegal to take a lion to the movies & It is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception; prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold" Massachusetts: A woman can not be on top during sexual activities & Children may smoke, but are not allowed to purchase cigarettes Michigan: A wife's hair legally belongs to her husband & it is legal for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, goats, cows, horses, and chickens Minnesota: It is against the law to serenade your girlfriend & no man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of sardines, garlic, or onions on his breath Missouri: Dancing is strictly prohibited & Children may buy shotguns but not toy cap guns Montana: It is a felony for a wife to open her husbands mail & balls may not be thrown Nebraska: A man may not run around with a shaved chest & doughnut holes may not be sold Nevada: Sex without a condom is considered illegal & it is legal to hang someone for shooting your dog on your property New Hampshire: Cattle may not cross the road without being fitted with a device to gather its feces & It is illegal to pick up seaweed on a beach New Jersey: It is illegal to slurp soup & It is illegal to offer whiskey or cigarettes to animals at the local zoo New Mexico: It is legal for couples to have sex in a parked car on their lunch break & You may not carry a lunchbox down the street New York: Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business & the penalty for jumping off a building is death North Carolina: Fights between cats and dogs are prohibited & It is against the law to sing off key North Dakota: Beer and pretzels can not be served at the same time & it is illegal to lay down and fall asleep with your shoes on Ohio: A police officer may bite a dog to quiet him & You can not catch a mouse without a hunting license Oklahoma: Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more & people who make ugly faces at dogs may be jailed or fined Oregon: Dishes MUST drip dry & anyone with a bad reputation is prohibited from disturbing malt beverages Pennsylvania: All fire hydrants must be checked one hour before all fires & It is illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors Rhode Island: It is illegal to sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to one customer on sunday & any marriages where either of the parties is an idiot or a lunatic is null and void South Carolina: By law if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage MUST take place & musical instruments may not be sold on sunday South Dakota: Every hotel room is required to have twin beds, the bed must always be two feet apart and it is illegal to make love inbetween the beds on the floor & It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory Tennessee: It is illegal for a woman to call a man for a date & hollow logs may nto be sold Texas: Criminals are to give their victims 24 hour notice, either oral or written, to explain the nature of the crime to be committed & pigs may not have sex on the airport runways Utah: When a person reaches the age of 50 they can marry his/her cousin & Throwing snowballs is illegal Vermont: It is against the law to whistle under water & Women must obtain written premission from their husbands to wear false teeth Virginia: A law requires bath tubs to be kept outside in the yard, not in the house & it is illegal to kick your wife out of bed Washington: It is illegal to deflower a virgin, even on their wedding day & You may not ride an ugly horse West Virgina: It is illegal to dig for ginseng in your neighbors yard without premission & Road kill may be taken home for supper Wisconsin: Margarine is illegal & citizens may not murder their enemies Wyoming: It is illegal to have sex while standing in front of a store's meat freezer & you may not take a picture of a rabbit during the month of June