Fubar Blog Posts 2

Woman Arrested For Making Faces At Dog
Trial in taunting of police dog canceled 8 minutes ago A prosecutor dropped charges against a woman who was arrested for staring at and making faces at a police dog. After all, the prosecutor reasoned, the four-legged witness can't testify. Jayna Hutchinson was about to go on trial this week on charges of cruelty to a police animal and resisting arrest, but the case was dropped Tuesday. "I think it was going to be difficult to prove her conduct changed the dog's behavior," Orange County State's Attorney Will Porter said. "Most of the time (in harassment cases) people would come tell the court what it felt like. Dogs can't do that." Hutchinson, 33, of Lebanon, N.H., was charged in July when police were called to a market to investigate a report of a brawl. They were approached by Hutchinson, who said she had been assaulted the day before by one of the men involved and wanted to make a statement. Vermont State Police Sgt. Todd Protzman told her she seemed drunk and he

A Woman Was Out Golfing
A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes." The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!" The woman said, "That's okay." For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to". The woman replied, "That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me." So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world! For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest

Woman Over 50
For those of us lucky enough to be over 50 and those who will be soon enough. Here is a piece written by Andy Rooney - CBS 60 Minutes: As I grow in age, I value women who are over 50 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 50 will not lay next to you in bed and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 50 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting. A woman over 50 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 50 give a damn what you might think about her or what she's doing. Women over 50 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it. Older wom

Woman Had Yellow Crystals In Her Blood
As an invstagator I run across many stories some wich I think are hoaxes and some so bazarr that it's all most like meeting a 500 yearold vampire face to face. One of my stories I actuall heard on a local T.V. station a few years ago and I have been trying to follow up on it but to no leads the storie remains a cold case but according to the FDA and the CDC the woman was contaminated with amonia in her blood. So on with the storie A young mexican woman was brought to an undisclosed hospital in LA county complaining of stomach acks and was vomting yellow ooze and she smelt horrible like amonia CDC flew her in and closed the area wing. Apon blood draw the nurse noticed yellow crystals in her blood and stoped the blood draw pulling out the needle she got sick and she to had simular symtoms.The lady died the nurse was treated but nothing more was told about her.apon atopsy 2 firemen and a CDC worker were affected by a horrible gas that came from the womans body they to had yellow crysta

A Womans Worth..
When God created woman he was working late on the 6th day An angel came by and said: Why spend so much time on that one? And the Lord answered: Have you seen all the specifications I have to meet to shape her ?" She must be washable, but not made of plastic, have more than 200 moving parts which all must be replaceable and she must function on all kinds of food, she must be able to embrace several kids at the same time, give a hug that can heal anything from a bruised knee to a broken heart and she must do all this with only two hands. The angel was impressed. Just two hands....impossible! And this is the standard model?! Too much work for one day....wait until tomorrow and then complete her. I will not, said the Lord. I am so close to complete this creation, which will be the favourite of my heart. She cures herself when sick and she can work 18 hours a day. The angel came nearer and touched the woman. But you have made her so soft, Lord She is soft", said the Lord, But I have also ma

Womasn Are Evil
A woman went up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her immediately. She seductively signaled that he should bring his face closer to hers. As he did, she gently caressed his full beard. "Are you the manager?" she asked, softly stroking his face with both hands. "Actually, no," he replied. "Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she said, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair. "I'm afraid I can't," breathed the bartender. "Is there anything I can do?" "Yes. I need for you to give him a message," she continued, running her forefinger across the bartender's lips and slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently. "What should I tell him?" the bartender managed to say. "Tell him," she whispered, "there's no toilet paper, hand soap, or paper towels in the ladies room."

A Woman's Love Poem
WOMAN'S LOVE POEM Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend. MAN'S LOVE POEM I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course, and loves to send me fishing and hunting. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.

A Woman Should
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... one old love she can imagine going back to... and one who reminds her how far she has come... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants or needs to... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... something perfect to wear if the date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a youth she's content to leave behind... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling in her old age... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... one friend she who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...

Womans Love Poem A Friend Did
Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend.

A Woman
A WOMAN is many things, earth and fire, fire and water, spirit and heart She is unique and worthly but mainly a woman is BEAUTY within a hidden mystic and a blessed elegance. For she is a sister of all women and the daughter of the GODDESS herself.

Woman
Why do people stop and stare? Could it be the rags I wear? Maybe it's the kink in my hair My stance My stride consumed in the knowledge of pride. A lioness in herden, a woman without and within. Beauty in the smiles talk This is why they stand and gawk.

Womans Wants
What I Want in a Man, Original List 1. Handsome 2. Charming 3. Financially successful 4. A caring listener 5. Witty 6. In good shape 7. Dresses with style 8. Appreciates finer thing 9. Full of thoughtful surprises 10. An imaginative, romantic lover What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32) 1. Nice looking 2. Opens car doors, holds chairs 3. Has enough money for a nice dinner 4. Listens more than talks 5. Laughs at my jokes 6. Carries bags of groceries with ease 7. Owns at least one tie 8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal 9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries 10. Seeks romance at least once a week What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42) 1. Not too ugly 2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car 3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally 4. Nods head when I'm talking 5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes 6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture 7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach 8. Know

A Woman Was Helping Her Husband Set Up His Computer
A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, the computer advised him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he will use to log on. The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for the shock effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious what he was entering by stating each letter out loud as he typed...... P.... E.... N.... I.... S.... His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied: *** PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH ***

A Woman Should Have
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE one friend who always makes her laugh.. and one who lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored.. A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE a feeling of control ever her destiny... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to fall in love without losing herself.. EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... HOW TO QUIT A JOB, BREAK UP WITH A LOVER, AND CONFRONT A FRIEND WITHOUT RUINING THE FRIENDSHIP... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents...

Woman's Advantages
Benefits of Being Female We got off the Titanic first. We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses. When we buy a vibrator, it's sexy. When men buy a blow-up doll, it's pathetic. Our boyfriend's clothes look elfin and gorgeous on us -- guys look like complete idiots in ours. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game. Taxis stop for us. Men die sooner, so we get to cash in on the life insurance. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing. Free drinks. Free dinners. We can hug our friends without wondering if they think we're gay. We can hug our friends without wondering if we're gay. We know the truth about whether size matters. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life. Condoms make no significant difference in our enjoyment of sex. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a

Woman: Can Do Anything
Woman: can do anything The airliner pushed back from the gate, the flight attendant gave the passengers the usual information regarding seat belts, etc. Finally, she said, "Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to your destination." Ed sitting in the eighth row thought to himself, "Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman?" When the attendants came by with the drink cart, he said "Did I understand you right? Is the captain a woman?" Yes," said the attendant, "In fact, this entire crew is female." "My God," said Ed, "I'd better have two scotch and sodas. I don't know what to think with only women up there in the cockpit." "That's another thing sir," said the attendant, "We no longer call it the cockpit." "It's The Box Office."

A Woman's Random Thoughts...
A Woman's Random Thoughts Skinny people piss me off! Especially when they say things like, "You know sometimes I forget to eat, now I've forgotten my address, my mother's maiden name, and my keys. But I've never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat." They say you shouldn't say anything about the dead unless it's good. He's dead. Good. A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills. She had 14 kids, but she doesn't give a damn. The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing (and then they marry him.) I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, smoking too much, impulse buying and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a perfect day. I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff. "If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day

A Woman Should
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..one old love she can imagine going back to.. and one who reminds her how far she has come... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a youth she's content to leave behind... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a set of screwdrivers,cordless drill, and a black lace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored... A WOMAN SHOULD H

A Woman Should Have
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..one old love she can imagine going back to.. and one who reminds her how far she has come... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a youth she's content to leave behind... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a set of screwdrivers,cordless drill, and a black lace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal that will make her guests feel honored... A WOMAN SHOULD H

A Woman's Revenge
A construction worker was whistling and verbally harassing a young girl as she walked by the construction site. She completely ignored him, and just kept on walking. Annoyed, the worker yelled, "Well you're an ugly bitch anyway!" The girl turned around and replied, "It must be terrible when even an ugly bitch won't give you the time of day." (Having worked on a job site with some of these asses I know this one would shut biggest bastard up in no time!)

Woman
Woman - A Chemical Analysis Current mood: crazy HAZARDOUS MATERIALS INFORMATION SHEET MATERIALS SAFETY DATA SHEET Woman - A Chemical Analysis Element: Woman Symbol: Wo Discoverer: Adam Atomic Mass: Accepted at 53.6Kg, but known to vary from 40-200Kg. Occurrences: Copious quantities in all urban areas. Physical Properties: a) Surface usually covered in painted film. b) Boils at nothing; freezes without reason. c) Melts if given treatment. d) Bitter if incorrectly used. e) Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore. f) Yields if pressure applied in correct places. Chemical Properties: a) Has great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious stones. b) Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances. c) May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason. d) Insoluble in liquids, but activity increases greatly by saturation in alcohol. e) Most powerful money

The Woman...
This is written in the Hebrew Talmud!!! (the book where all of the sayings and preaching of Rabbis are conserved over time) It says: "Be careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. The WOMAN CAME OUT of a MAN's RIB. NOT from his FEET to be WALKED on, and Not from his HEAD to be SUPERIOR, but from the SIDE to be EQUAL, from UNDER the ARM to BE PROTECTED, and NEXT to the HEART to be LOVED."

Woman's Vs Man's Poem
WOMAN'S POEM Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend. MAN'S POEM I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a golf course. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit

A Woman Go's To The Doctor's
A woman goes to her doctor's office, afraid of the strange development on the inside of her thighs. She has a green spot on the inside of each. They won't wash off, they won't scrape off, and they seem to be getting worse. The doctor assures her he'll get to the bottom of the Problem, and tells her not to worry until the tests come back. A few days later, the woman's phone rings. Much to her relief, it's the doctor. She immediately begs to know what's causing the spots? The doctor says, "You're perfectly healthy -- there's no problem. But I'm wondering, is your boyfriend a Harley rider?" The woman Stammers, "Why, yes, but how did you know?" "Tell him his earrings aren't real gold."

Woman Missing After Meeting Guy Off Craig's List!!!
Friday, July 6, 2007 Search for missing Rancho Santa Margarita woman narrows Two 'persons of interest' named in search for 19-year-old last seen with man she met on Web site. By SALVADOR HERNANDEZ and KIMBERLY EDDS The Orange County Register RANCHO SANTA MARGARITA – A registered sex offender and another man have been named as persons of interest in the case of a 19-year-old girl who disappeared two weeks ago after climbing onto the back of a motorcycle with a man wearing a black helmet to head to a house party. Hours after Donna Jou left home, she talked to a friend over the phone for about 20 minutes and told him she had locked herself in a bathroom because the guy she was with was "freaking her out," Jou's parents said. Friends and family said they haven't heard from the San Diego State University student since then, and authorities are asking for the public's help to find her. Donna Jou told her mother the man who was picking her up June 23 was her friend's boyfrien

Woman's Words (funny)
Words Women Use: 1.) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. 2.) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. 3.) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with Nothing usually end in Fine. (Refer back to #1 for the meaning of Fine.) 4.) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it! 5.) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word , but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of Nothing.) 6.) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she w

The Woman Next Door
What I know of the woman next door The woman next door, I knew her well She use to come out from where she dwells Full of life she use to be Believed in all, she believed in me What I know of the woman next door A mother she was, the best of all She loved her child, parenting her call A friend she was, always stood tall She would catch her friends each time they would fall. What I knew of the woman next door She spoke her mind, and loudly I must agree She stood by her convictions to a "t" She would not let many in for fear of being deserted Some called her a bitch, I would say assertive. What I knew of the woman next door She did not mind being in the shadows at times When you where at your lowest and drowning, she always dropped a line. One day, she woke up and needed a hand No one was found, Not one woman or man, She looked all around to those she had been bound Not one single friend could be found. What I knew of the woman

Woman/man
WOMEN'S ENGLISH 1. Yes = No 2. No = Yes 3. Maybe = No 4. We need = I want 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry 6. We need to talk = you're in trouble 7. Sure, go ahead = you better not 8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later 9. I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron! 10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about? MEN'S ENGLISH 1. I am hungry = I am hungry 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy 3. I am tired = I am tired 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage! 5. I love you = let's have sex now 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex? 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you 10. Can I take you out to dinner? =

Woman Attacked For Wearing A Shirt That Supports The Troops!
This was forwarded to me from a good friend, just makes my b;ood boil when I too walk anywhere and get remarks of my support for the troops... Thanks Kim for bringing this to my attention. My friend Carolin just wrote a blog entitled MY RUN IN WITH A HATE MONGER This is what she wrote: Minding my own business in the local Walmart (wearing one of my t-shirts from Ft Leonard Wood) a woman approached me,,,and said, "You don't really support these killers do you, these so called soldiers are just an Army of killers that Bush has set out to destroy the children of this world, you should be ashamed of your self for supporting such animals of Satan", Well I kept my cool and explained to her that if it wasn't for these so called killers that she would not have a Walmart to shop in or even the right to think no matter how stupid her thoughts are let alone voice them in public,,I urged her to go home and think about what she has said and to realize how lucky she is to live in such

Woman's Revange....lol
WOMEN'S REVENGE > "Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished > to purchase. > As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a > television set in her purse. > "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. > "No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me, > and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally." >

A Woman's Poem
A Woman's Poem He didn't like the casserole And he didn't like my cake. He said my biscuits were too hard... Not like his mother used to make. I didn't perk the coffee right He didn't like the stew, I didn't mend his socks The way his mother used to do. I pondered for an answer I was looking for a clue. Then I turned around and smacked the shit out of him... Like his mama used to do. AMEN! from Kathleen

Woman Of My Dreams...
Last thing in my mind, nothing is left to be seen it's a vision of you, only a dream. My head lays softly on the pillow, I imagine it being you lying against you as I drift off into my dreams, there we'll meet the woman of my dreams. I fall asleep fast, nothing to hold me back a heavy fog sets in, and we're here at last You come walking to me, once gliding step after another I walk slowly towards you, looking at your beauty like none other. Your hair blowing in the wind, your eyes see my soul my arms reach out, you I want to hold We get so close, I can smell your perfume why must my dreams be so short, another time another dream

Woman's Perfect Breakfast
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider. MARRIAGE SEMINAR While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, "It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes." He addressed the man, "Can you name your wife's favorite flower?" Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it? CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS A man walks into a pharmac

Woman 62, Kills Sleeping Grandson, Gets 25 Years
Woman 62, kills sleeping grandson, gets 25 years http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/07/19/grandma.sentenced.ap/index.html MONTAGUE, Texas (AP) -- A 62-year-old woman was sentenced to 25 years in prison for killing her teenage grandson while he slept, then setting their mobile home on fire. Jamie Larue Holmes had pleaded guilty to murder and arson. She will be eligible for parole when she's 75, prosecutor Jack McGaughey said. Firefighters found the body of Brock Holmes, 18, inside the burning trailer near Nocona, northwest of Dallas, in June 2006, and police found his grandmother hiding in woods nearby. She said she shot the teen in the back of the head while he was sleeping at his desk the morning after they had argued about his getting a job, McGaughey said. Holmes told authorities she planned to shoot herself but ran out of bullets. Investigators never determined a motive, but McGaughey said Holmes indicated a conflict with her grandson that she did not want discusse

50% Woman
Do you know what a 50% Woman is? Well, let me tell you, so you'll know the definition of one, She's the one who's gonna take all that that pain and insecurities and make them undone. My 50% Woman is definately gone be a winner, she's gonna be about her shyt, She'll let me know she aint going no where and Im not either, cause she's legit. Because she's my 50% Woman.. She'll take my keys without asking and bring my car back with only a half a tank left, Wear all my damn wife beaters..and hides my damn fitteds.. Leave me the hall closet for my shyt, and keep the walk in for herself... Go in my wallet and take what she wants and leaves what I need.. Wear my J's to go outside and check the mail.. Drinking 50% of the fuckin koolaid... And 85% of the fuckin bed (hopefully I'll get some cover) But its ok, Because with a 50% Woman, there's a discount 4 everything you need, That hot cooked meal when you get to the crib, Loving your child as her own (If you have

A Woman, And A Man
ON NICKNAMES If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose. If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go out for lunch, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Useless. ON EATING OUT Mike, Charlie, Bob and John will each throw in $20, even though the bill's only $22.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators. ON MONEY A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. ON BATHROOMS The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify most of these items. A man has six items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, tooth paste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Holiday Inn. ON ARGUMENTS A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says a

Woman Don't Cry
Artist: Zakk Wylde's Black Label Society Album: Hangover Music Vol. VI Title: Woman Don't Cry In the end, all will be fine I'm losing your mind Life is short, we all run out of time This darkness that's set in your room Close your eyes, we're all leaving soon But now, I'm going away Woman, don't you cry Woman, don't you cry This ain't the first or the last Goodbyes come so fast The darkness that's here, it never ends Always so close yet so far I've seen the blood and the scars Right now, I'm going away Woman, don't you cry Woman, don't you cry Woman, don't you cry Woman, don't you cry Woman, don't you cry Woman, don't you cry Woman, don't you cry Woman, don't you cry

A Woman's Perfect Breakfast
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

Woman I Need One Not A Girl
So i woke up this morning and i thought about making love to someone but i have no idea who because im so use to being with someone im alone now and well it suck but doing u is good for as long as it last i just wana know ladies why do women key word women say one thing then do another. Dont get me wrong ladies fellas we do the same but well just wana know.

Woman's Boobs
A young boy asks his father, "Dad, is it ok for us guys to notice all the different kind of boobs?" Surprised, the father answers, "Well, sure son, we wouldn't be normal if we didn't... there are all kinds of breasts. Depending on a woman's age, they are different shapes. In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions." "Onions, Dad?" "Yeah, you see them and they make you cry!"

Woman Smile
Lesbians guide to eating pussy. Men suck at eating pussy. Not because they don't like it but because it is really fucking hard. You have to learn it. Giving good head is the key to just about everything in life (including getting good head later on), so it's time we broke it down. Like this. The secret to giving good head is to read the signs. You could be the best sexual mechanic in the world, but if you can't read the emotional road signs, you're going to end up wandering around in a desolate labial wasteland until, eventually, you drop from exhaustion, hot tears of confusion streaming down your face. Think of eating the puss as your way of saying, "Although I am about to rock your insides with 3,000 pounds of explosives, here's a little treat session to show you how I really feel." Instead of a screamed "OH MY GOD!!" like her baby has been trapped under a car (which is what fucking should do), cunnilingus elicits a more splendiferous "ohmygodohmygodohmy god." Kin

Woman's Dictionary
DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS 40-ish = 49 Adventurous = Slept with everyone Athletic = No tits Average looking = Ugly Beautiful = Pathological liar Contagious Smile = Does a lot of pills Emotionally secure = On medication Feminist = Fat Free spirit = Junkie Friendship first = Former very *friendly* person Fun = Annoying New Age = Body hair in the wrong places Open-minded = Desperate Outgoing = Loud and Embarrassing Passionate = Sloppy drunk Professional = Bitch Voluptuous = Very Fat Large framed = Hugely Fat Wants Soul mate = Stalker WOMEN'S ENGLISH: Yes = No No = Yes Maybe = No We need = I want I am sorry = you'll be sorry We need to talk = you're in trouble Sure, go ahead = you better not Do what you want = you will pay for this later I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron! You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about? MEN'S ENGLISH I am hungry = I am hungry I am sleepy = I am sleepy I am tired = I am tire

Woman Complains To Police About The Quality Of Her Cocaine Purchase
ROCHELLE, Ga. (AP) -- A woman was arrested after she called police to help "get her money back" after she was unhappy with the crack cocaine she purchased. Juanita Marie Jones, 53, called Rochelle Police late Thursday night after she purchased what she thought was a $20 piece of crack cocaine, according to police reports. She told officers she broke the rock into three pieces and smoked one, only to discover the drugs were "fake." She took Officer Joel Quinn and Deputy John Shedd of the Wilcox County Sheriff's Office into her kitchen and showed them the drugs, police said. She was promptly arrested on charges of possession of cocaine. --- Information from: Cordele Dispatch, http://cordeledispatch.com © 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Woman's Group Warn's Of Hazards In Cleaners
Click Here to access the original article. Leave me a comment to tell me what you think. This just shows one of the many reasons I replaced what I consider TOXIC household cleaners in my home with products using Natural Derivatives instead ~ and Yes I'm on my Soapbox. Women's group warns of hazards in cleaners Industry skeptical chemicals are linked to fertility disorders JANE KAY San Francisco Chronicle Wednesday, July 25, 2007 SAN FRANCISCO — Dozens of common household cleaning products contain hidden toxic chemicals linked to fertility disorders in lab animals, according to data gathered by a women's research group. A type of glycol ether is frequently found in popular cleaning products such as Windex Aerosol, Formula 409, Lemon Fresh Pine-Sol and Simple Green All Purpose Cleaner, says the report released Tuesday by Women's Voices for the Earth, a Montana-based nonprofit organization working to eliminate or reduce toxic chemicals in the home. The chemical is called

Woman In Construction
why the hell do they try and introduce woman into construction when they`ve just had children, no experience in the industry but expect to learn everything in a couple of days?.......it takes 3 - 7 years to gain a `tools` qualification but if your female.......1 year...LoL

Woman Sets Fire To Ex-husband's Penis
A woman set fire to her ex-husband's penis as he sat naked watching television and drinking vodka, Moscow police said Wednesday. Asked if the man would make a full recovery, a police spokeswoman said it was "difficult to predict." The attack climaxed three years of acrimonious enforced co-habitation. The couple divorced three years ago but continued to share a small flat, something common in Russia where property costs are very high. "It was monstrously painful," the wounded ex-husband told Tvoi Den newspaper. "I was burning like a torch. I don't know what I did to deserve this."

Woman Beater Gets Sliced Up Like A Freakin Pizza
Woman Beater Gets Sliced Up Like a Freakin Pizza*Warning: could make you puke on your monitor* A woman's husband caught this bastard in his house beating his wife, and this is the result. Once you watch this, you can never un-watch it, so heed the warning.Get humor videos at NothingToxic

A Womans True Beauty
a womans true beauty, is like a blossuming rose, as days go by its the beauty that grows, the peddles open and it shows, inner beauty is what to behold, grab your heart and dont let go, cause you will feel it from your head to your toe, like a wave passing through, makes every guy look at you, but its i who figured out the clue, to know you is a treat that true, the eyes are the windows to your soul, compared to your beauty i am the troll, i shall climb the mountains to gain your trust, even if i fall and get crushed, you are worth the feat, for you are the one i wish to meet, to me that would be the biggest treat, i would be glad to take the back seat, you are truely kind, one day i wish you i would find, thing have been too weird in my life, like i was stabbed with a knife, but here i sit i must admit, probably looking like a twit, or even a dim-witt, but true love is what i seek, will someone open thier heart for me to peek, but please dont think of me as

Womanese The Impossible Language
"WOMANESE" CAN'T WE JUST BE FRIENDS? There is no way in hell I'm going to let any part of your body touch any part of mine, again. I JUST NEED SOME SPACE. ... without you in it. DO I LOOK FAT IN THIS DRESS? We haven't had a fight in a while. NO, PIZZA'S FINE. ... you cheap slob! I JUST DON'T WANT A BOYFRIEND NOW. I just don't want you as a boyfriend now. I DON'T KNOW, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO? I can't believe you have nothing planned. COME HERE. My puppy does this, too. I LIKE YOU, BUT... I don't like you. OF COURSE I LOVE YOU. ... just not in that way. YOU NEVER LISTEN. You never listen. WE'RE MOVING TOO QUICKLY. I'm not going to sleep with you until I find out if this guy at the gym has a girlfriend. I'LL BE READY IN A MINUTE. I'm ready, but I'm going to make you wait because I know you will. OH, NO, I'LL PAY FOR MYSELF. I'm just being nice; there's no way I'm going dutch. OH YES!!! RIGHT THERE!! Well

Woman Can Fuck Themselfs
i like how all woman say they dont look fr someone hot,rich etc.... and yet when i talk to them they say, oh your cute or hot then fucking use me for a free meal. i fucking hate that and wont take ir anymore. so that means i dont look that good. who fucking cares anymore. i dont. maybe when they arent retarded then i might. so all you woman fuck you and burn in fucking hell.

Woman Waving From Wtc 1 Impact Area - Photos And Videos
----------------- Bulletin Message ----------------- From: nierika Date: 11 Sep 2007, 19:38 http://www.whatreallyhappened.com/wtc1_woman.htmlWoman Waving From WTC 1 Impact Area - photos and videos..Home :WRH Store : href="quickindex/">WRH Index : Reader Letters :Archives : href="advertise/">Advertise : Donate Woman Waving FromWTC 1 Impact AreaThis photograph taken from the href="http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&ct=res&cd=1&url=http://www.serendipity.li/wot/wtc_ch2.htm&ei=cCABQ8mNNZmaYdL3rKEH">WTC report shows the aircraft impact area of WTC 1......it also shows asurvivor looking out from the hole made by the aircraft impact:Zoom of above image - click for full sizeEnhanced image -

A Womans Worth
Smooth was her body moist soft curvy, some call it art some call it sin. To look at a master peace of a woman’s body is more beautiful than gold. She was dressed in black heels nothing else, she had a smell of illuminating strawberries, and her skin was like silk cloth dancing on a sheet of water in perfect harmony with each curve. Her feet were like thirty carrots of gold; seductive and sexy her legs were, like fiery sister tornadoes throwing, burning, and vanishing everything else that would appear beautiful. Her breasts were tender as a rose but strong as unhardened clay. Her lips were silky and piousness as a snake. Her eyes were like fire burning my soul my heart into agony. Her hole body was like looking into the sun; blinded by her beauty, not seeing her black holes, not knowing if she were good or evil. Just as the sun sins its heat to the earth, she was sending me sexy seductive and illuminating perfection, w

Woman In Heat
Woman In Heat by Bunny for her The heat of a woman rising in lust To bring flames to life turning lovers to dust The heat that can burn, scorch and sear When ever her lover gets too near But if they survive the flames The passion she shows will drive them insane Locked in a timeless ecstasy With no escape none they can see Would they want to run away? Diving in deeper with their soul they must pay Of all the passions of women unbound It’s the passion of lust that brings a lover down.

Woman!
why the fuck must woman be like that .....why must everything go they're way and only they're way? why do they have to have us guys leave to think shit over ...to see if the "feelings" are still there? am i over reacting? or should i be acting like this? i have more to add but i will later !!!!

Woman
Woman, Oh woman Why do you make me feel Every time I'm near you My heads a spinning wheel Woman, Oh woman What have you done to me Woman, Oh woman Did you cast a spell on me Woman, Oh woman When you touch me, I chill When you kiss me, I'm in heaven I've known nothing so real Woman, Oh woman When I gaze into your eyes I'm blinded by the passion I feel that's deep inside Woman, Oh woman Did you over do your spell My hearts in many pieces It sadens me to tell Woman, Oh woman What have you done to me Woman, Oh woman Did you cast a spell on me Woman, Oh woman In sadness I do tell My hearts in tiny pieces Did you over do your spell.

Woman's Poem/man's Poem
WOMAN'S POEM Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man, who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ MAN'S POEM I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a golf course. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.

A Womans True Beauty
a womans true beauty is like a blossuming rose, as days go by its the beauty that grows, the peddles open and it shows, inner beauty that is wonderful to behold, grab your heart and dont let go, cause you will feel it from your head to your toe, like a wave passing through, its i who figured out the clue, to know you is a treat you true, the eyes are the windows to your soul, compared to your beauty i am the troll, i shall climb the mountains to gain your trust, even if i fall and get crushed, you are worth the feat, for you are the one i wish to meet, to me that would be the biggest treat, you are truely one of a kind, one day i wish you i would find, but here i sit, i must admit, probably looking like a twit, or even a dim-witt, will someone open thier heart for me to peek, but please dont think of me as a geek, for what i seek, you are so true and kind, so i know one day i will find, the one who would make me complete, with out having to compete, for i a

Woman's Top Tens For Dating
Women’s Top Ten Favorite Ways to Have Someone Flirt with Them 1. Talks about things she likes or dislikes, making comments and showing interest 2. Displays concern for her, her feelings and well-being 3. Shares jokes or amusing anecdotes with her 4. Compliments her on her screen name, attitude, personality and appearance 5. Sends her special/cute email messages 6. Makes an effort to contact her in some form most every day 7. Sends instant messages when she and you are online at the same time 8. Discusses seriously the traits she desires in a partner 9. Shows her your daring or mischievous side 10. Emails her greeting cards, gifts, pictures songs or fun attachments Top Ten Restaurant Types for a Date 1. Casual dinner 2. Pub 3. Retro bar with live music 4. French cuisine 5. Ethnic 6. Pizza place 7. Western 8. Salad bar 9. Sushi bar 10. Family dinner Women’s Top Ten Date Picks 1. Restaurant 2. Taking a romantic walk 3. Park 4. C

Womans Humour
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. Keep reading-they get better!!! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- WOMEN'S REVENGE "Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. "So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. "No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) I know I'm not going to understand women.

Woman Vs Man In The Shower....
Part 1: HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN: Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according To lights and darks. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.. If you see husband Along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in The mirror, make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide Loofah and pumice stone. Wash your hair once with cucumber and Sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes Until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a smal

A Woman, A Dream, A Ghost
Don't count on me to tell you who she is (or if she is) - I swear to God, I just don't know. I didn't write these words for you (unless you're her) - I swear to God, I just don't know. If you'll end up hating me because of words I've written to a woman, a dream, a ghost, then, God, I just don't know what I can say. How can I be responsible for being haunted by a need to use my words to try to reach out through my anguish and aloneness? Should I keep them to myself and bounce them off of my own walls and consider it a curse to be blessed with words I can never speak? If you are the woman these belong to, have the courage now to claim the words I've written from the moment I could write. Step forward from the shadows and allow me now the freedom to put them to your name and to your face. For as much as this is torture for the women who would dream to own these words, imagine how it feels to be the man who dreams to give them, God, to give them, please,

The Woman
The woman by Cathy D When I was young and didnt know much or if I got a little out of touch You were there to guide me . I was tought morals on how love should be How to beautify myself and to have respect That someone who tought me was you . Walk with your head up high always stand your ground These were the words you said I found truth in ever word spoken or found. Where did that woman go The woman that tought me those words I see that woman everyday Everytime I look in the mirror or when somebody looks my way. Sometimes you need guidance to help make it through So lean on the shoulder of a friend if you are ever feeling blue As a friend I will say I see you hurting everday I cant stand to see the pain from a love with nothing to gain This man you married said I do He promised to be faithful, honest and true. That man was just an image Of the love you were trying to seek This man had nothing to g

Woman / Man Poem
Woman/Man Poem WOMAN'S POEM Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who’s handsome, smart and strong One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend. MAN'S POEM I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a golf course. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.

Woman Suing Irs Over Sex-change
The Associated Press Oct. 1, 2007 01:07 PM NEW YORK - After years of painful soul searching, Rhiannon O'Donnabhain - a former construction engineer from a devout Irish Catholic family in Boston - decided to surgically change his sex to female in 2001. The struggle was equally tough financially - hormone treatments and medical procedures set her back $25,000, a burden she felt could be partially offset by taking a $5,000 tax deduction for medical costs. When she sent in her tax claims after the surgery, the Internal Revenue Service initially issued the 64-year-old former Coast Guard reservist a refund check for $5,000. But soon after, she was audited and ordered to return the refund because the IRS had determined that her surgery had been merely "cosmetic" - and therefore not tax deductible. Rather than return the money, O'Donnabhain opted to sue the IRS. The result has been a riveting case - the first of its kind in normally staid U.S. Tax Court - in which lawyers have just con

A Woman He Needs
A woman he needs He needs a housekeeper in the kitchen, a lady in public, a partner in work, a friend in troubles and a porno-star in the bedroom. The most funny thing is that very often men don't understand that all these different identities couldn't survive in a body of one woman. They often forget that a modern woman doesn't stand in the shadow of her man any longer, and doesn't consider her only aim to help him and to serve his interests. So this – I want it all and I want it now – doesn't work. Each man has to find out his own priorities in the relationships with the opposite sex. So he needs an understanding, loyal friend. He likes to talk about his interests, ideas and projects. He'd like to have a passionate listener who will look at him with admiring and understanding eyes, catching his every single word, sharing every thought. Women do know how to play a role of such a listener. The main thing is to make those passionate eyes, the rest is not so importa

A Woman And Her Dog
A woman has a dog who snores in his sleep, so she goes to the vet to see if he can help. The vet tells the woman to tie a ribbon around the dogs testicles and he will stop snoring. A few hours after going to bed, the dog is snoring as usual. Finally, she goes to the closet and grabs a piece of ribbon, ties it around the dog's testicles and surely enough, the dog stops snoring. The woman is amazed. Later that night, her husband returns home drunk from being out with his buddies. He climbs into bed, falls asleep and begins snoring very loudly. The woman thinks maybe the ribbon will work on him too. She goes to the closet once again, grabs another piece of ribbon and ties it around her husband's testicles. Amazingly, it also works on him. The woman sleeps very soundly. The next morning, the husband wakes up very hung over. He stumbles into the bathroom to urinate. As he is standing in front of the toilet, he looks in the mirror and sees a blue

A Woman Over 30.....
This is for all you girls 30 years and over... And for those who are turning 30, and for those who are scared of moving into their 30's... AND for guys who are scared of girls over 30!!!!... This was a monologue by Andy Rooney from the CBS show, 60 Minutes Andy Rooney said: As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting. A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in whom she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 give a hoot what you might think about her or what she's doing. Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera

Woman Golfer
A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes." The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!" &nbs p; The woman said, "That's okay." For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to." The woman replied, "That's okay, because I will

Woman Runs Over Own Legs At Mcdonald's Drive-thru, Burns Vagina.
Her lawyer reported to have said she will be filing a lawsuit for some ungodly amount of money claiming burns to her vagina. Sure theres more to the story. Who gives a fuck! What do we know here? She ran over her own legs at a McDonald's Drive-thru. And is filing a lawsuit claiming burns to her vagina. Thats enough...you need no more details. The end. Life is a queer bitch ain't it? Your pal on pills & supposed "Satan Worshiper" according to old folks, retards & random MySpace/360 strangers. Rick

Woman Seeks Rich Husband, Banker Says "crappy" Deal
NEW YORK (Reuters) - Deal or no deal? An online exchange between a woman looking for a husband who earns more than $500,000 a year and a mystery Wall Street banker, who assessed her potential for romance as a business deal, has cause quite an Internet stir. The anonymous 25-year-old woman recently posted an ad on the free online New York community Web site Craigslist, http://newyork.craigslist.org/, appealing for advice on how to find a wealthy husband. "I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think I'm overreaching at all," the woman, who described herself as "spectacularly beautiful" and "superficial," wrote. "I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. $250,000 won't get me to Central Park West," she said, asking questions like "where do rich single men hang out?" The mystery banker, who said he fit the bill, offered the woman an analysis of her

~ Woman Bought Guns And Bomb-making Material For 14 Year Old Son ~
What the hell is wrong with these people? From Allan Chernoff and Brian Vitagliano CNN PHILADELPHIA, Pennsylvania (CNN) -- A woman bought guns and bomb-making material to indulge her socially outcast 14-year-old son, a prosecutor said Friday. Michele Cossey, 46, faces charges in connection with her son's alleged plan for a Columbine-like attack on a school. She is accused of buying him a .22-caliber handgun, a .22-caliber rifle, a 9 mm semiautomatic rifle and black powder used to make grenades. "There's a lot of things at play here," Montgomery County District Attorney Bruce Castor Jr. said. "You have a child who is obviously emotionally disturbed and a social outcast, and no doubt the parents feel sorry for him and are indulging him. "This is not the best parenting I've ever seen, obviously, and she has to be held accountable for that." Cossey was charged Friday with unlawful transfer of a fiream, possession of a firearm by a minor, corruption of a minor, endangerin

Womans Dui
A cop saw a car weaving all over the road and pulled it over. He walked up to the car and saw a nice-looking woman behind the wheel. There was a strong smell liquor on her breath. He said, 'I'm going to give you a breathalyzer test to determine if you are under the influence of alcohol.' She blew up the balloon and he walked it back to the police car. After a couple of minutes, he returned to her car and said, 'It looks like you've had a couple of stiff ones.' She replied, 'You mean it shows that, too?'

A Woman....
"A Woman" This is written in the Hebrew Talmud, the book where all of the sayings and preaching of Rabbis are conserved over time. It says: "Be very careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. The woman came out of a man's rib. Not from his feet to be walked on. Not from his head to be superior, but from the side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected, and next to the heart to be loved."

Womans Poem
I have my legs I sit down to pee And I can justify Any shopping spree Don't go to a barber But a beauty salon I can get a massage Without a hard-on I can balance a checkbook I can pump my own gas I can talk to my friend About the size of my ass My beauty's a masterpiece And yes it takes long At least I can admit To others when I'm wrong I don't drive in circles At any cost And I don't have a problem Admitting I'm lost I never forget An important date You just gotta deal with it I'm usually late I don't watch movies With lots of gore Don't need instant replay To remember the score I won't lose my hair I don't get jock itch And just cause I'm assertive Don't call me a bitch Got this from a friend lol thought i was cute Don't say to your friends Oh yeah, I can get her In your dreams my dear I can do better Flowers are okay But jewelry’s best Look at me you idiot Not at my chest I don't have a problem With expressing my feelin

A Woman's Poem!!
I shave my legsI sit down to peeAnd I can justifyAny shopping spreeDon't go to a barberBut a beauty salonI can get a massageWithout a hard-onI can balance a checkbookI can pump my own gasI can talk to my friendAbout the size of my assMy beauty's a masterpieceAnd yes it takes longAt least I can admitTo others when I'm wrongI don't drive in circlesAt any costAnd I don't have a problemAdmitting I'm lostI never forgetAn im

The Woman In The Car
The rain beat against her windshield as she just got out of work and got in her car ,It was only 11:30, but by this time all the malls were closed and as it was the middle of the week, people didn't have a reason to be out, so she practically had the roads to herself. And how she loved it; normally she would drive fast, just wanting to get home as fast as possible, but tonight? Nah, tonight was beautiful, it was simply beautiful, the rain pounding against the roof of her car, demanding entrance, which caused her to smile secretly. Trying to force penetration; yes, that's the word that ran over and over in her mind, penetration. Her fingers tightened their grip over the steering wheel as she shifted her hips, painfully teasing herself. Ah, erotic. That's what it was, sinfully erotic and there was nothing she could do about, except allow herself to be swept away, give into the most basic human instinct. Allow her mind to be drowned out in pleasure, his soft, alluring voice filling her e

A Womans Flaw.......
One Flaw in Women By the time the Lord made woman, he was into His sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, “Why are you spending so much time on this one?” And the Lord answered, “Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable, and able to run on diet Coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart—and she will do everything with only two hands.” The angel was astounded at the requirements. “Only two hands! No way! And that’s just on the standard model? That’s too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish.” “But I won’t,” the Lord protested. “I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18-hour days.” The angel moved closer and touched the woman. “But you have made her so soft, L

Woman Stabs Tied-up Lover To Drink Blood
Oct 23, 6:32 PM (ET) MESA, Ariz. (AP) - A woman who stabbed her tied-up lover so she could drink his blood has been sentenced to 10 years in prison. Tiffany Sutton told Maricopa County Superior Court Judge David Udall that she was sorry for the incident and said she never meant to hurt anyone, but received the stiff sentence anyway after he called the crime especially heinous. Sutton, 24, pleaded guilty to aggravated assault in August. She was arrested by Tempe police in February after she repeatedly stabbed her lover during an alcohol- and drug-fueled sexual tryst. According to police reports, the victim, 46-year-old Robert McDaniel, agreed to be tied up during sex but became alarmed and asked to be untied when Sutton pulled out a knife and said she liked to drink blood. Sutton then attacked him, slicing his leg, puncturing his arm, shoulder and back and cutting his neck and stomach. When he escaped, she chased him with a pickax. Sutton's attorney, Elizabeth Houck, told th

A Womans Worth!
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... One friend who Always makes her Laugh... And one Who lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A good piece of furniture not previously owned by Anyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE Eight matching plates, Wine glasses with stems, And a recipe for a meal that will Make her guests feel honored. A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A feeling of control over Her destiny... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to fall in love Without losing herself... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... HOW TO QUIT A JOB BREAK UP WITH A LOVER AND CONFRONT A FRIEND WITHOUT RUINING THE

A Woman
Able to leap small buildings, in a single bound Yet unable to keep all her emotions down Mysterious questions swim through her head The only way to beat her, join her instead She is stronger than the others, invisible power Yet deep down inside she’s as fragile as a flower With the ability to squeeze a watermelon through a dime She holds the ability to choose every time She keeps it together so well that she’s worn Just don’t mess with a woman whose scorn Bleeding five days without death P.M.S. the reason for fiery breath All that she says and all that she’s for Becomes overlooked, just to settle the score A mother, a teacher, a child, a bitch No distinction on the fine line of which. She’ll shop as long as the money is there She has over one hundred pairs of underwear She listens, and talks, letting all be known The reason, you see the high bills for her phone No vinegar, spiders, or puppy dog tails She’s sugar and spice and manicured nails Beauty, Intelligence,

The Woman Inside
You worry over how long My love will truly last, Both of us have problems With memories of our past. Here I have a solution One I think will do, Use it when you wonder How deeply I love you. Whenever doubts come to mind And you're not sure how I feel, In your mind just picture me And the truth will be revealed. For if you look close enough You'll see there in my eyes, The truth of my love for you And then you'll realize. If this doesn't work for you Then in your mind try, Feel my hand taking yours And hear my loving sigh. Feel my fingers closing over Your warm and supple hand, Find the strength in my touch And then you'll understand. Just listen for my voice Whispering in your ear, You'll never be alone my love For I am always near. This love that I have for you No matter what's in our past, Is strong enough to get us through This love we have will last. Not only thru all time and Beyond all doubts we find, Please allow this love to wip

Woman's Worth
In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question, "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking, "Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said, "Yes." She began to explain... "As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man...or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life." He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said, "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental

Woman's Worth...
In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question, "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking, "Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said, "Yes." She began to explain... "As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man...or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life." He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said, "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental s

Woman An Guys Hurting Each Otherwhy?
why do guys cheat on a good woman?? why do most guys only think with there little head an not the brains. an woman why do woman like the damn dear john letters when leaveing a guy just to hurt him more when he loves her?? some one please give me the answers.

Woman On Top Sex Positions
Many couples find this a very exciting sex position, and it gives a woman a good chance of reaching orgasm during intercourse. In addition, this position can give a woman a sense of excitement, control and power during the act of sex. It takes her away from the idea that she is the submissive partner in lovemaking, or that lovemaking is something that a man "does" to a woman. The woman can control the speed and depth of lovemaking, and get a sense of dominance over her male partner. For men it can be exciting to see their partners' breasts or buttocks (depending on whether she faces towards him or away from him), and it gives the woman a chance to initiate sex and control the pace and rhythm of sex. She's no longer the passive partner during sex, the one who passively receives the man's vaginal thrusts. Relinquishing control like this can be a good experience for a man who's secure enough in himself not to feel threatened by the role reversal. The woman on top sex position descri

A Woman Scorned.
Arion thee! Thou art distempered with fell. Fie. Go forth and flee, like thy fond whitehearted beast. Thou hast proven thyself to be mearly a knave. Thy love for one was pageant. Prithee, pronounce thy regret for adultery. How dare thee dally withal a runnion! Cleave to thy Brach. Thou hast lost thy love of something so mary. Thou cannot speak of being fap! Thou hast fobbed thy love. For what?! A fond dally? Thou hast antick 'pon I. Thou hast baffled thyself for a mear pin-butted caitiff. Thou villainous puke-stockinged mildewed-ear! Haste me to know't, that I, with wings as swift as meditation or the thoughts of love, may sweep to me revenge. Arion thee, thou infectious heavy-handed malignancy! Fly and never return. (Interpretation -- Some dude's just cheated on his lover with some rotten hooker. I spent all this time researching Shakespearean words for this one. I'm in a low mood..)

The Woman In Me
I'm not always strong And sometimes I'm even wrong But I win when I choose And I can't stand to lose But I can't always be The rock that you see When the nights get too long And I just can't go on The woman in me Needs you to be The man in my arms To hold tenderly 'Cause I'm a woman in love And it's you I run to Yeah, the woman in me Needs the man in you When the world wants to much And it feels cold and out of touch It's a beautiful place When you kiss my face The woman in me Needs you to be The man in my arms To hold tenderly 'Cause I'm a woman in love And it's you I run to Yeah, the woman in me Needs the man in you Yeah the woman in me Needs the man in you I need you baby Yeah yeah Oh baby...

A Woman
I am thinking here on this sunday afternoon while attempting to be good and clean up proper like. Well, if I ever do find a lady to keep around or who more importantly wants to keep me around that she should like to clean. I mean, be one of those girls who likes a place nice and tidy. Gets on me case about being slob. I need me a lady who likes to clean but would prefer that I cook. I say that because I love to cook....HATE to clean. Anyway, I dunno. I think i'm being "bad" by taking the time out to write this silly blog instead of cleaning like I know I should be. I'm terrible, I know. Ok...back to the cleaning. Someone come and save me!!!!!!!!!! Preferred, redheaded with freckles :P

Woman
How would you feel if you had a girl who tells all of your dirt online and her friends constantly bitch at you for doing things when it isnt even there business? dont get me wrong i dont like drama and i dont like fighting but what relationship is perfect? im not perfect so here is what i have to say to you, you know who you are if you feel like you said you do, go right ahead leave find a more local girl im not playing the stupid online drama game with you!

A Woman's Brain
Have you ever wondered how a woman's brain works? Well....it's finally explained here in one, easy-to-understand illustration: Every one of those little blue balls is a thought about something that needs to be done, a decision or a problem that needs to be solved A man has only 2 balls and they take up all his thoughts.

A Woman's Fairy Tale:
This is the fairy tale that we should have been reading as little girls! Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat, contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. A frog hopped into the princess' lap and said: Elegant Lady, I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however, and I will turn back into the dapper, young Prince that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can satisfy my needs, prepare and serve my meals, clean my clothes, bear my children, and forever feel grateful and happy doing so. That night, as the princess dined sumptuously on lightly sautéed frog legs seasoned in a white wine and onion cream sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself: I DON'T F***ING THINK

A Woman Should Have....
>A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A set of screwdrivers,a cordless drill, anda black lace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... One friend whoAlways makes herLaugh...And oneWho lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A good piece of furniturenot previously owned byAnyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE Eight matching plates,Wine glasses with stems,And a recipe for a meal that willMake her guests feel honored. A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... A feeling of control over Her destiny... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... How to fall in love Without losing herself... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... HOW TO QUIT A JOB BREAK UP WITH A LOVER AND CONFRONT A FRIEND WITHOUT RUINING THE FRIENDSHIP...

Woman's Freedom To Be
I will sing you a song now of freedom, Of the wonders of just being free, So at last you may know on which path you should go As you learn what it is just to be. For the real you is not just a mother, Nor a daughter, a sister or wife, And it isn't a sage or a worker for wage Nor the labels you wear throughout life. There are no roles that you must conform to, No pattern in which you must fit, No preordained slot, and like it or not, No reasons in life to submit! All the words in this life which describe you, And the titles that identify, Are simply man-made so that in life's parade Other people will know who walks by. All the rules that you have been obeying, Just unlearn them, and start off anew, For it isn't your goal to assume any role, But to find, and become the real you. Just release all the names that men gave you, And begin with your basic design. It's ok just to be, open up and you'll see That once free, then all else is sublime!

Woman In Repose
December 4, 2007 @ 4:01 am Woman in Repose Lavender feeling, caressing, Reaching out to love unrequited. Lavender woman hourglass figure Graceful silhouette – subtle in repose, Defiant shoulder straight, erect, Wistful frame wanting to embrace the dance. Lavender woman skin satin silk, Alabaster sheen unblemished clear, Smiling lines border twinkle eyes, Downy hair neck waiting to be nuzzled. Lavender woman voice crisp, clear, Confidant, dynamic, sensitive, loving, Lyrical musings in barely audible sighs, Demonstrative yet plaintive. Lavender woman presence be known, Commanding with leprechaun underpinnings, Woman/child balanced, complex, desirable, A poetic rendering waiting to be read.woman sight serene, Blues eyes speak of moments anticipated, Dreaming of waiting beaus, To be received and swept to the Ball. Lavender woman blonde swept hair framing simple smile, Soft spoken lips awaiting the breath of a kiss, Sensual elegance in moisten lip

The Woman.
John hated he was listening as well as hearing, he’d begun to notice things about the intruder, small details, like the color of her hair the dress she wore. It enraged they penetrated the dark world he had lived in, ever since his wonderful Jeanie had gone. Jeanie OH! Jeanie! A weight of sorrow, pain, engulfed his being, every thought, memory that came of Jeanie, compounded his pain, loss, the emptiness, loneliness, causing him to die gradually and he was disappearing. To live was wrong, torture, living was futile and there was absolutely no joy without Jeanie his love. Talk! Man! She was a motor mouth, the first two or three conversations they had were draining and he retreated into himself like a turtle hiding under his shell, never responding to anything she said, do you think that stopped her? NO! Consequently gigantic silences occurred. In his inner eye he saw, felt, her squirming, wriggling, nerves jiggling, jerking, inside and outside, the silences were agonizing. The wo

A Woman's Decision..
lights go out on a rainy night, the wind storms open the windows and rushes inside, her silky dark hair flows freely and wildly, her blue eyes shine like glass even in the dark, she is deliciously scared at the fear that binds her, she paces slowly and timidly towards her chambers where she knows it awaits her, she pauses momentarily in front of her door, reaching out with her hand to turn the knob, her heart begins to pulse, her hands begin to tremble, she's afraid, the pleasure that awaits her behind that door terrifies her, she retrieves and walks away from the door, she paces back and forth in front of that door, she wants to enter, she fears it but simultaneously desires it, she stops in front of the door and leans her forehead against it, tears flow down her skin, such desire tortures her so deep, she feels passionately weak as the sweetness of her juice begins to flow, she's fighting the temptation to caress herself, which only arouses her even more, she turns her back against t

Woman's Only Flaw
One Flaw In Women Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

~woman Aren't Perfect~
~Woman Aren't Perfect~ Woman aren't perfect, what can't men see We Aren't P*e*r*f*e*c*t And never will be.... They lose their tempers, so easy... Woman Aren't Perfect one day they'll see... We have our flaws, most men not want to see.... But Still expect us yet to be Perfect, NO, Not, Me, i'm far from perfect mostly... copywritten@Mira2007

A Woman's Poem
He didn't like the casserole And he didn't like my cake. He said my biscuits were too hard. . . Not like his mother used to make. I didn't perk the coffee right He didn't like the stew, I didn't mend his socks The way his mother used to do. I pondered for an answer I was looking for a clue. Then I turned around and smacked him one . . . Like his mother used to do

Woman Accused Of Groping Mall Santa
DANBURY, Conn. - Santa Claus says that a woman who sat on his lap was naughty, not nice. A Santa at the Danbury Fair mall said the woman groped him. "The security officer at the mall said Santa Claus has been sexually assaulted," police Detective Lt. Thomas Michael said of the weekend complaint. Sandrama Lamy, 33, of Danbury, was charged with sexual assault and breach of peace. She was released on a promise to appear in court on Jan. 3. Police quickly found and identified Lamy because the woman was described as being on crutches, said Capt. Bob Myles. A call seeking comment from Lamy was answered by a recording Tuesday morning. A woman later called back and said: "It's a false report and I don't have any idea." Police did not give the name of the disconcerted Santa, but they said he is 65 and felt badly because children were waiting to see him. "He was apparently shocked and embarrassed by the whole incident," Myles said. A man who teaches hundreds of prospective Santas

Woman May No Longer Blow Her Horn, And Bus Driver Ticketed...
Good Morning. Don’t you just hate it when tradition comes to an end? Well that is the case in which Jeri Priest of Denver Colorado is going through right now…withdrawal from blowing her own horn. See for the last 30 years after every point The Denver Broncos professional football team scored, Jeri blew her horn. A device not to strange to most of us. But strange just the same. Because Jeri’s horn was not one, but six car horns wired together for that awe inspired blast after every point the Bronco’s scored. It seems the neighborhood in which she lived in had gotten use to it. Well for 30 some years of doing this I guess they would come to expect it. Except for one Lawyer type that apparently moved into the neighborhood and I would think that person had been told of what transpired after a Denver Bronco score…but…perhaps not. The Lawyer who wishes to keep their amenity won their battle with this 69 year old lady and her husband. So the couple decided to give the horn contraption away to

A Womans Worth
A WOMAN CAN BE A MOTHER, A TEACHER, A PROVIDER, A COMPANION. A WOMAN CAN CURE A BROKEN HEART, HEAL YOUR WOUNDS, A WOMAN CAN TREAT YOU LIKE A KING. WHEN THE WORLD HAS YOUR BACK AGAINST THE WALL SHE SUPPORTS YOU, AND HELPS YOU STAND PROUD AND TALL. WHEN THE RAIN IS FALLING SHE IS THE SUN BEAMING THROUGH THE CLOUDS, THAT FIRST TOUCH OF WARMTH ON YOUR FACE AFTER THE RAIN IS GONE. A WOMAN IS SENSITIVE, THEREFORE SHE KNOWS HER INNER SENSE, A MOTHER ALWAYS TEACHES HER DAUGHTERS TO FOLLOW THEIR FIRST MIND CALLED A WOMAN'S INTUITION. BUT THIS STRONG DIVERSE WOMAN IS FRAGILE SHE CAN BREAK.

Woman's Death Classified As Homicide
I have tragic news that my best friend Rita thought that I should blog about it. Just in case if anyone knows Heidi, who had her on their page and wonder what happen to her. Heidi wasnt just a 360 friend of mine, she was a personal friend as well. Just wanted to let you all know that she was murdered last Tuesday between 12 noon & 2.pm she was shot in the head several times, I am just so devastated and sad and to think what that poor woman must of had went through during her last moments here on earth. They have the police and homicide detectives all over this case, her children cant say anything until this case is solved. One of her son's couldnt get in touch with her over the phone and got worried about her, so he went over to her house to check on her and found her dead in her bedroom on the floor. Soon as this happened she was taken off yahoo, etc. We believe that the detectives had taken her computer and all her data out to try to find out what ever they can. She just e-mailed me

A Woman In Perilþ
A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die." As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms. While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?" Insulted, she shrieked, "No!" So, he dropped her. As she passed the 10th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked. "Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself. He dropped her, too. The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the sixth floor. "I suck! I screw!, I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic. The man looked at her in disgust and said "Slut!"; then dropped her.

Womans Revenge
A woman and her boyfriend are out having a few drinks. She starts talking about this really great new drink. The more she talks about it, the more excited he gets. She tries to talk him into having one. After a while he gives in and lets her order the drink for him. The bartender brings the drink and puts the following items on the bar: A salt shaker, a shot of Baileys, and a shot of lime juice. The boyfriend looks at the items quizzically and the woman explains. "First, put a bit of the salt on your tongue, next you drink the shot of Baileys and hold it in your mouth, and finally you drink the lime juice." So, the boyfriend, trying to go along and please her, goes for it. He puts the salt on his tongue . salty but OK. He drinks the shot of Baileys . smooth, rich, cool, very pleasant. He thinks ... this is OK. Finally he picks up the lime juice and drinks it .... In one second the sharp lime taste hits ... At two seconds the Baileys curdles . At three seconds the salty

Woman Of My Dreams
I want someone that is not going to act like a bitch and spy on me when I am only a one woman guy anyways. I had someone at one time and she turned out to not even care about me and the worst thing is she caused me to have to be put in the Hospital due to being so upset and hurting my vocal box from screaming so much cause of her spying and bitching and other things she did. The best part about it is she thought I was cheating on her cause she called my while I was talking to my father. So now I get to start from scratch with someone new and that person should be funny, smart, beautiful, and some other things that I will discuss with the right person that would like to be with me. However a big thing with me is trust and being lied to cause I can't stand woman that are willing to break those. So if you want you can comment on here or you can write me on the shout box area. Hopefully I can find someone that I can see eye to eye with and have some decent conversations with.

Woman In You.
I can see behind those eyes, the woman who hides Slowly I can pierce your thoughts Revealing what you hide insdie Temptations flare without a dare It's the woman in you I swear The woman in you, lights my fire Moving wildly these inner desire Moments we share

A Woman
A Woman This is written in the Hebrew Talmud, the book where all of the sayings and preaching of Rabbis are conserved over time. It says: "Be very careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. The woman came out of a man's rib. Not from his feet to be walked on. Not from his head to be superior, but from the side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected, and next to the heart to be loved. "Pass this on to all exceptional women that you know.. and to men so they can be reminded of the value of a woman.

Woman's Heart Attack (myocardial Infraction)
Woman's heart attack (myocardial infraction) This is the best first person account of a woman's symptoms of a heart attack I've read. Please read and share with the women in your life. I was aware that female heart attacks are different, but this is the best description I've ever read. Women and heart attacks - (Myocardial infarction) Did you know that women rarely have the same dramatic symptoms that men have when experiencing a heart attack . . . you know, the sudden stabbing pain in the chest, the cold sweat, grabbing the chest & dropping to the floor that we see in the movies. Here is the story of one woman's experience with a heart attack. "I had a completely unexpected heart attack at about 10:30 PM with NO prior exertion, NO prior emotional trauma that one would suspect might've brought it on. "I was sitting all snugly & warm on a cold evening, with my purring cat in my lap, reading an interesting story m

A Woman
A Woman's Poem A woman is the calm of a hurricane's eye where a man finds transquility as the storm passes by A woman is the softness inside the shell when the shell is bonbarded by man's creation of hell A woman is the pillar of a temple foundation where a man comes and goes with renewed inspirations A woman is the cloud that carries the rain giving life to man's soul parched from anxieties and pain A woman is the bank of the river flows helping man's direction by being the woman she knows A woman is the sound of a Lark's song in the morning when mist covers life and man feels forlorn A woman is the emotions shared with a man the climax of giving by the touch of a hand A woman is the flesh that holds the seed the miracle of birth fullfilling human need A woman is the mother of a new generation a man is the direction of that aspiration

A Woman’s Heart
A Woman’s Heart A woman’s heart is focus upon love’s gentle greeting. Treat a woman’s heart like a fragile flower that always needs sweet, but passionate coaching of love’s sweet praise. A man must keep track and always update new knowledge in his heat that keeps his love alive for the woman of his desire. A woman’s heart needs the awareness of her man’s campaign that guides them towards a bond that will seal them forever as one. Your own personal risk reduces when each heartbeat is for true love only. A woman’s heart will always maintain love’s gentle kiss forever within your reach. ©2006 Firestar (PublishAmerica.com) Two-Sided Realities

Woman And A Fork
Woman and a Fork There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things 'in order,' she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in. Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her. 'There's one more thing,' she said excitedly. 'What's that?' came the Pastor's reply. 'This is very important,' the young woman continued. 'I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand.' The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to say. That surprises you, doesn't it?' the young woman asked. 'Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request,' said the Pastor. The young woman e

A Womans Week At The Gym
If you read this without laughing out loud, there is something wrong with you. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine. Dear Diary, For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress. MONDAY: Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She is something of a Greek goddess -- with b

Woman Pimpout By My Fav Sexi Girl Ever Phonix
So amazing how this world was made, I wonder if that is a woman? With her smile and her style she'll protect you like a child...thats a woman. Show these women the most fubar love you can cause even though I may not talk to them all on a regular basis, I love them all and so should you!! She'll put a smile upon your face... G☼δδε§§ of Light FuWife of Harleyrider70 Fu-Mistress of LoneWolf@ fubar ♥ BooBoo ♥ Founder of Shadow Levelers.@ fubar **PR Mamii**Owned By NEL****Member Of The Spankers Club**(PLZ RATE PAGE & FAN B4 U Add TY I Return T@ fubar And take you to the higher place... Kat " FuOwned by UKnowUWantMe"@ fubar ~Slave Princess~I'm Your Angel~@ fubar Kinkstar Sin * Fu-Owned by Mikey * LOL Family@ fubar So dont you under estimat

Woman Are Clever
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. God works in mysterious ways. After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers. The woman says, 'So you're a man. That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days.â€ Flattered, the man replies, 'Oh yes, I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God! But you're still at fault...women shouldn't be allowed to drive. The woman continues, 'And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune.' Then she hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it

A Woman And A Fork...
There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things "in order," she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in. Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her. "There's one more thing," she said excitedly. "What's that?" came the Pasto

Womanizer On Fubar Need's To Go
He stashes me and tell's only half the story about Deanna,Here is the truth from his own word's to Deanna. Woman be ware.She was a smart woman who was used. *LORD WOLF*Founder Wolves of Wiccan Society & Spirit Warrior Levelers@ fubar Lord Wolf- Wolves of Wiccan Society,Seeking Comment Bombers.Link in Blog@ fubar from: *LORD WOLF*Founder Wolves of Wiccan Society & Spirit Warrior Levelers date: 2008-02-01 10:13:14 subject: RE: Make happy now? read receipt: No replied: No block user === 'Seeking New Bomber's* Witoka No More*' spewed forth the following at '2008-02-01 08:22:52'.. > > > === '*LORD WOLF*Founder Wolves of Wiccan Society & Spirit Warrior Levelers' spewed forth the following at '2008-02-01 08:01:38'.. > > > > > > === 'Seeking New Bomber's* Witoka No More*' spewed forth the following at '2008-02-01 07:51:29'.. > > > > > > T. say she went back to Deanna's last night forgot wallet find Deanna tyrd to OD.Does this make you happy now

A Womans Week At The Gym
A WOMAN'S WEEK AT THE GYM If you read this without laughing out loud, there is something wrong with you. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine. Dear Diary, For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress. MONDAY: Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. Sh

A Woman Should Know.........
"MAYA ANGELOU'S" BEST POEM EVER A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .. a youth she's content to leave behind.... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... a past j uicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age.... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... .. a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE . one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .... a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ... a feeling of cont

A Woman
Be very careful if you make a woman cry,because God counts her tears.The woman came out of a man's rib.Not from his feet to be walk on.Not from his head to be superior,but from the side to be equal.Under the arm to be protected,and next to the heart to be loved.

The Woman's Code
The secret rules that women live by but rarely divulge to men. Invite a man to go shopping with you only if you need someone to carry your packages or drive. Assure your boyfriend that every female movie star has had a boob job. When your man asks you what's wrong, say "Nothing." However, when Oprah, Dr. Phil or Dr. Laura asks you, go into excruciating detail. Leave nothing out. The negative effects of cheese puffs and chocolate-chocolate chip ice cream are offset by the positive effects of diet soda. Feet are flexible and can be made to fit into shoes varying from size 7 to 9, depending on what's on sale. You can skimp on clothes, but a good bra is worth its weight in gold. (That's Victoria's secret.) The Patricia Principle: The more you've been trying to attract the attention of a particular man, the more likely it is that you'll run into him when you're sweaty, short of sleep, without makeup, wearing house-painting clothes, with your hair in a bandana. The b

A Woman's Dictionary
A woman's dictionary Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet. Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman. Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n. You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but, he, "made the dinner." Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand them. Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n. Gotta get married in a church. Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks. Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&Ms. Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game. Exercise (ex*er*siz) v. To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase. Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. What you spend half an hour writing, then forget t

The Woman's Compact Instruction Book
THE WOMAN'S COMPACT INSTRUCTION BOOK Never do housework. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was spotless. Remember you are known by the idiot you accompany. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door. So many men - so many reasons not to sleep with any of them. If they can put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all there. Tell him you're not his type - you have a pulse. Never let your man's mind wander - its too little to be left out alone. Go for younger men. You might as well - they never mature anyway. Never marry a man for money. You'll have to earn every penny. Definition of a bachelor: A man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable. The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for it. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him check books. A man's idea

A Woman's Perfect Breakfast
A WOMANS PERFECT DAY SITTIN AT THE TABLE SIPPIN HER GOURMET COFFEE HER SON IS ON THE COVER OF THE WHEATIES BOX HER DAUGHTER IS ON THE COVER OF BUISNESS WEEKLY HER BOYFRIEND IS ON THE COVER OF PLAY GIRL AND HER HUSBAND IS ON THE BACK OF A MILK CARTON

Woman
I opened up your picture, and much to my surprise, I saw you silken hair and then looked into lusterous eyes. The lips I saw were precious, so moist and ruby red, I took in all the charms that were a part of your sweet head. The picture kept on going, and so my eyes did too, and took in what the picture showed, some more of woman, you. Your neck was fine and carried a message I could hear, caress me oh so gentle, and place a kiss right here. The blouse you wore was modest, it's buttons were all done, but dear I have to tell you, your nipples yearned for sun. They pushed against the fabric, and said their sweet hello, would someone please take notice, unleash us, don't be cruel. I cannot help but wonder, if lips would kiss so sweet, and long to have another, or would they soon retreat? I'd love to take your blouse off, and tender kisses place, where usually there is satin, or cotton or some lace. To gently kiss your bossum, and help your nipples free, to gain their sweet reflect

Woman Safety
GIRLS--WE CAN NEVER READ THIS ONE TOO MANY TIMES!! > > ALWAYS FIGHT BACK!!!! > > > > > A refresher for those that have already seen this... > > Through a Rapist's Eyes (No Joke) > > > > This is important information for females of ALL ages . > > > > > When this was sent to me, I was told to forward it to my lady friends, but I forwarded it to most everyone in my address book. My men friends have female friends and this > information is too important to miss someone. > > Please pass it along . > > A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts: > > 1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed . They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair . Women with short hair are not common targets. > >

The Woman's Nightstand Companion? Oh Yeah!
Critically acclaimed as "The Woman's Nightstand Companion" Peter Britt's book "All That I Am, I Think!" is a journey into truth and understanding. You will learn a lot about who Peter Britt is and get a lot of laughs, too. This is a must read book, you'll be happy you did. Click here for Peter's publisher book store Click this link to order the Hard Cover book. $24.99 shipping included Click here to order All That I Am, I Think! in Hard Cover Click this link to order the paperback book. $19.99 shipping included Click here to order All That I Am, I Think! in paperback Just click the cdbaby logo to buy That's What Living's For by Peter Britt

A Womans Dream!
When Fred first noticed that his penis was growing larger and staying erect longer, he was delighted, as was his wife. But after several weeks, his penis had grown to nearly twenty inches. Fred became quite concerned. He was having problems dressing and even walking, so he and his wife went to see a prominent urologist. After an initial examination, the doctor explained to the couple that, though rare, Fre d's condition could be fixed through corrective surgery. 'How long will Fred be on crutches?' the wife asked anxiously. 'Crutches? Why would he need crutches?' responded the surprised doctor. 'Well,' said the wife coldly, 'you are going to lengthen his legs, aren't you?

A Woman's Tears
A little boy asked his mother, "Why are you crying?" "Because I'm a woman," she told him. "I don't understand," he said. His Mom just hugged him and said, "And you never will." Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?" "All women cry for no reason," was all his dad could say. The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry. Finally he put in a call to God. When God got on the phone, he asked, "God, why do women cry so easily?" God said: "When I made the woman she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort. I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children. I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining. I gave her the sensitivity to love her c

Woman
Woman I can hardly express, My mixed emotion at my thoughtlessness, After all I'm forever in your debt, And woman I will try express, My inner feelings and thankfullness, For showing me the meaning of succsess, oooh well, well, oooh well, well, Woman I know you understand The little child inside the man, Please remember my life is in your hands, And woman hold me close to your heart, However, distant don't keep us apart, After all it is written in the stars, oooh well, well, oooh well, well, Woman please let me explain, I never mean(t) to cause you sorrow or pain, So let me tell you again and again and again, I love you (yeah, yeah) now and forever, I love you (yeah, yeah) now and forever, I love you (yeah, yeah) now and forever, I love you (yeah, yeah)...

Woman
"A good woman is proud of herself. She respects herself and others. She is aware of who she is. She neither seeks definition from the person she is with, nor does she expect them to read her mind. She is quite capable of articulating her needs. A good woman is hopeful. She is strong enough to make all her dreams come true. She knows love, therefore she gives love. She recognizes that her love has great value and must be reciprocated. If her love is taken for granted, it soon disappears. A good woman has a dash of inspiration, a dabble of endurance. She knows that she will, at times, have to inspire others to reach the potential God gave them. A good woman knows her past, understands her present and moves toward the future. A good woman knows God. She knows that with God the world is her playground, but without God she will just be played. A good woman does not live in fear of the future because of her past. Instead, she understands that her life experiences are merely lesso

A Woman's Worth
What Can You Bring to the Table? In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said "Yes." She began to expound... "As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man...or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. "I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life." He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need convers

A Woman Who Values Herself...
What Can You Bring to the Table? In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said "Yes." She began to expound... "As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man...or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money. "I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life." He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need convers

Woman
IF U R ON MY EVILANDNAUGHTY ACCOUNT DO NOT TALK TO ME UNLES U R IN THE ROOM I HANG OUT IN. AND DONT ASK ME TO GET YOU A DRINK UNLES U R IN THE ROOM I HANG OUT IN.AS FOR LOVE THERE IS NO LOVE. I WANT ONE WOMAN TO SHOW ME THAT LOOKS DONT MATTER AND THAT MONEY DONT MATTER. THAT WHAT IS ON THE INSIDE THAT COUNTS THE MOST. IM WALL IS GOING BACK UP. AND GOOD LUCK BREAKING IT BACK DOWN.

Woman Please, I Just Don't Care
Is it just me or do all women feel the need to explain, in full detail, specific things that happened to them during the day. Now, don't get me wrong. If it's a funny story, or relevant to a conversation, by all means tell me the story. But honestly, do I really need a detailed description of how johny told sam that jenny wanted chris to work for them but then chris said that johnny really didn't want to because he had to work for susy later on that day and he thought........ Did I mention I don't have a clue who any of these people are. I love my wife to death but Lord help me, sometimes I wish I had a mute button. Hey, maybe its me, or maybe I'm wrong. What do I know anyway... --I'M JUST BITCHIN

Woman Throws Kids From Overpass
DALLAS — Dallas police say 27-year-old Khandi Busby threw two of her children from the Jim Miller Road overpass into rush hour traffic on Interstate 30 Wednesday morning. She then leaped 22 feet to the pavement below. The boys, ages 6 and 8, were rushed to Children's Medical Center for treatment. The 8-year-old was in critical condition at noon Wednesday; the 6-year- old was in good condition. "Especially with the traffic — the fast-moving traffic out on the freeway this time of the morning in the hours of darkness — it's a miracle that both kids weren't hit directly by a passing car," said Dallas police spokesman Sgt. David Burroughs. Investigators said Busby stormed out of a car parked at a nearby gas station with the children in tow just before throwing them over the railing of the bridge. Busby was taken to Baylor University Medical Center, where she was initially reported in critical condition; later upgraded to fair. "We don't know the reason at this point

Woman Stuck On Toilet
Ok so...I'm from this small town in western Kansas. Let me tell you, this little town has really been buzzing with talk this week. Why? Well, its because of the story about the lady that sat in her boyfriends bathroom for two years and ended up becoming stuck to the toilet. This was at first just local news, it has now gone national and international. I can't believe it. I've lived in this town my entire life, and I've known the boyfriend forever. No, he's not a friend or relative but because it is such a small town everyone knows everyone for the most part. I've known for along time this girl has been in his house, and hasn't left for a number of years...atleast 10 years if not longer. There were plenty of people saying they didn't even know this guy had a girlfriend! I remember seeing the two walking around town when I was younger...the woman she was shy. She wasn't the most popular person so she was pretty reserved, but super nice. I remember her talking to me after the first time s

Woman Tries To Bring Skeleton On Plane
Woman Tries to Bring Skeleton on Plane Mar 12, 10:27 AM (ET) MUNICH, Germany (AP) - A woman was stopped at Munich airport after baggage control handlers found the skeleton of her brother sealed in a plastic bag in her luggage, police said Wednesday. The 62-year-old woman and her 63-year-old friend, who both live in Italy, were hauled in by airport police Tuesday after a scan of the bag showed a human skull and other bones. The women were traveling to Italy from Brazil. It turned out, however, that the woman was simply trying to fulfill the last wish of her brother - who died 11 years ago in Sao Paulo, Brazil - to be buried in Italy. The travelers produced the appropriate papers from Brazilian authorities for the unusual transport, and were allowed to carry on their way to Naples - bones and all.

A Woman's Heart
A woman's heart is a mystery- sometimes even to herself. We are deep, complex beings capable of giving a cold stare that will stop a man in his tracks or an embrace that will melt the hardest of hearts. A woman's soul is a treasure, one which needs to be dealt with firmly but equally as gentle. Do NOT make the mistake of thinking you ever have completely won her heart. A women is to be pursued and charmed all the days of her life by acts of kindness. She craves romance and little gestures that let her know she is still your heart's desire. The biggest mistake men make is in believing they no longer have to work at it.To let little opportunities to express some thought and consideration pass by. Woman are like apples on trees, the best ones and the good ones, (the ones that will stay faithful and treat you good)are all the way at the top of the tree.. Most men dont want to reach the ones all the way to the top of the true bcuz they are afraid of falling or getting hurt. Instead they

A Woman's Worth
A WOMAN CAN BE A MOTHER, A TEACHER, A PROVIDER, A COMPANION, A INTIMATE SENSUAL GODDESS, A WOMAN CAN CURE A BROKEN HEART, HEAL YOUR WOUNDS, A WOMAN CAN TREAT YOU LIKE A KING. WHEN THE WORLD HAS YOUR BACK AGAINST THE WALL SHE SUPPORTS YOU, AND HELPS YOU STAND PROUD AND TALL. WHEN THE RAIN IS FALLING SHE IS THE SUN BEAMING THROUGH THE CLOUDS, THAT FIRST TOUCH OF WARMTH ON YOUR FACE AFTER THE RAIN IS GONE. A WOMAN IS SENSITIVE, THEREFORE SHE KNOWS HER INNER SENSE, A MOTHER ALWAYS TEACHES HER DAUGHTERS TO FOLLOW THEIR FIRST MIND CALLED A WOMAN'S INTUITION. BUT THIS STRONG DIVERSE WOMAN IS FRAGILE SHE CAN BREAK. AS THE STORY GOES 100 KINGS HORSES AND A 100 KINGS MEN COULD PUT THAT WOMAN BACK TOGETHER AGAIN. TREAT HER LIKE A LADY OR DON'T TREAT HER AT ALL, OR IT CAN BE A DISASTER FOR ALL

Woman Vs, Man
WOMAN'S LOVE POEM. Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, and knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend. MAN'S LOVE POEM. I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course, and loves to send me fishing and hunting. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.

A Woman's Heart
A woman's heart More precious than all the stars A true gift from Heaven above There's nothing as fierce as her tender love So willing to sacrifice Just for you to see the love in her eyes She will hold back the tears she wants to cry Just to appear strong when everything's not alright I have been offered such a gift Not one that I deserve, I admit Hidden in the shadows of years of pain I want to raise it to the sun again God only knows if I'm doing this right How I long for the gift of foresight So for now I shall start By knocking at the door of this woman's heart

A Womans Wisdom--
It seems to be a time honored tradition in the world of women to pass on words of wisdom in dating love marriage and children. This blog will only address the dating aspect...Enjoy.. Laugh.. Hell take cliff notes. Whatever the case I hope you take something from it. Women make the common mistake of feeling to soon. Girl get over yourself, flirt have fun relish the fuzzy feeling but for god sakes don't invest yourself beyond that until he EARNS it. Men aren't the enemy they are simply men, don't persecute one man for every subhuman you encountered in the past. Let go and embrace the idea HE IS JUST A MAN, no worse no better you'll find good ones you'll find bad.. Enjoy and learn from both. Momma didn't lie when she said don't give the milk away for free...Why would someone pay for the cow when they have the choice of only paying for the times they use it? Someone, somewhere will always have an opinion of the man your with, the man you didn't get or the one you should b

Woman Chokes Out Cab Driver For Using Cell Phone
Woman Chokes Out Cab Driver For Using Cell Phone Assailant Arrested After 3 Cab Drivers On Other End Of Phone Hear Struggle Scott Weinberger NEW YORK (CBS) ¯ A city cab driver is back on the job after she was allegedly attacked by an unruly passenger who was angry she was talking on her cell phone. Neeru Singh says she picked up 43-year-old Paula Mergal, a Bronx resident, on the corner of 55th Street and Tenth Avenue at 9:30 a.m. Tuesday. Mergal asked to be taken to 27th Street and Broadway. At the time, Singh was on a hands-free conference call with five other taxi drivers, including three women. Within moments of the trip to Chelsea, Singh says that Mergal began berating her with racial slurs, asking if she was Hindu or Muslim, and telling her to go back to her country. Mergal allegedly claimed she was an undercover officer and threatened to arrest her if she didn't hang up the phone. Singh says she eventually complied and put the phone on the seat next to her, bu

A Woman Of Her Own Words
As i stand upon these tall rocks along the shore of the sea I stretch my arms like wings and let the wind come beneath my ffeet i take pride as i gaze up into the sun and see the beauty of its light I love how the rays of light touch the water of this giant mysterious sea thank you god for letting the spirit of the earth be apart of my whole world for i love it so and thank you for giving me the strength and wisdom to live my life the way i should i relise i am not like many other people for this is a unique gift i may not be smart at everything but i am wise i may not appear to be as old as my words but let that knowledge and wisdom that i love and care for become stronger and wiser when they need guidance i may not be as beautiful as the moon and stars in the night sky but i am beautiful in my own special way ether through my words wisdom strength knowladge or just the way i am i am my own unique person and that shall never change even as i grow old b

A Woman
a Woman She is a woman, a mother sister , daughter and wife the best friend anyone can have yes -she is a woman. Her heart is like an ocean infinite in its depth She carries within her much joy and sorrow sadness and happiness the ability to love, and live laugh and cry and to give up dreams She inspires and protects all she loves Inside she stores her treasures Some are broken, many blessed and in all of it she gives as a mother, sister - brandi daughter and wife And as a woman - brandi March 2008

Woman Arrested For Wow Love Affair
An Australian woman is facing child abduction charges in the US after trying to bring her 17-year-old World of Warcraft boyfriend back to Oz. Tamara Broome, a 31-year-old university student, was arrested on June 26 after she flew from Adelaide to the boy's home in Greenville, North Carolina to pick up her internet beau. Broome allegedly had an online relationship with the boy for more than a year, which began in the online game World of Warcraft. The two had also exchanged copious amounts of email and even discussed marriage. The Azerothian love-affair has sent Broome to Pitt County Detention Centre where she will get a July 11 court date. Police have seized her laptop computer and charged Broome with attempting to abduct a child. If convicted she will face more than two years in a US jail. Broome is currently being held on a $2.35m bond. (WoW equipment could not be seized by authorities, as it is soulbound.) Tamara Broome According to Australian news sources, Broome

Woman And A Fork
There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things 'in order,' she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in. Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her. 'There's one more thing,' she said excitedly. 'What's that?' came the Pastor's reply. 'This is very important,' the young woman continued. 'I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand.' The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to say. That surprises you, doesn't it?' the young woman asked. 'Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request,' said the Pastor. The young woman explained. 'My grandmother once tol

Womans Week At The Gym
Dear Diary, For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Brad, who identified himself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress. MONDAY: Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Brad waiting for me. He is something of a Greek god - with blond hair, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!! Brad gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which he conducted his aerobics class af

The Woman I Love, Eviltaz247
YOU MY LOVE ARE THE ONE I HAVE WAITED FOR ALL OF MY LIFE. A WOMAN WHO IS LIKE NO OTHER I HAVE EVER MET BEFORE. YOU HAVE HAVE ENDURED HELL, HARDSHIP AND HEART ACHE. STRONG AND HARD, STREET SMART, YET TENDER, FULL OF LIFE AND LOVE. A WIT SHARP AND QUICK. I CAN NOT IMAGINE LIFE WITHOUT YOU, YOU HAVE TOUCHED MY MIND, HEART, SOUL AND FLESH. I WISH TO LAUGH WITH YOU, CRY WITH YOU,GROW OLD, LIVE LIFE WITH YOU, AND IF NEED BE DIE FOR YOU. I THANK GOD EVERY DAY AND EVERY NIGHT, FOR THE MOST PRECIOUS GIFT, YOU MY BOO, THE LOVE OF MY LIFE. I SHALL LOVE YOU ALWAYS AND GIVE YOU STRENGTH AND PEACE WHEN YOU ARE TIRED AND WEARY. AND THAT MY HEART, SOUL AND LOVE YOU SHALL ALWAYS KNOW IS TRUE, TO NO ONE BUT YOU. THIS VOW OF TRUTH, LOVE AND DEVOTION, I GIVE TO YOU. XOXOXO SCOOTER

A Woman
A woman has strengths that amaze me. She can handle trouble and carry heavy burden. She holds happiness, love and opinions. She smiles when she feels like screaming. She sings when she feels like crying. She cries when she's happy and laughs when she's afraid. Her love is unconditional. There's only one thing wrong with her and that is that sometimes she forgets what she is worth. Pass this onto every beautiful woman you know

Woman's Rulebook For Dating
Woman's Rulebook For Dating If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you right, then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend . Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have

Woman In Our Life
A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter 'Don't forget your Sisters,' she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. 'They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them.' 'Remember that 'Sisters' means ALL the women... your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other women relatives too.. 'You'll need other women. Women always do.' What a funny piece of advice!' the young woman thought. Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I jus

Womanly Desires
As she laid lonely in her tub The soft soapy water refreshes Her stressed out body The water soothed but a man would relieve, The unsatiable power of desire that controlled her As the years have past, she feels an incredible desire to be wanted, to be touched, to be loved. As she closes her eyes to let the bath soak in, she feels strong warm hands caress her face, Slowly moving down to the fullness of her breast. Warm lips meet hers, and tongues begin to dance. She begins to feel an aching in her body As his hands tingles down her stomach to the inner part of her thighs. Her clit becomes hard and throbbing. As his tongue circles softly on her neck His tonges caresses her nipples as his hand gently rubs her swollen treasure. She lets out a soft moan, as by now he rubs lightly enough to tease her clit, causing her head to move back wards, then soft moans escapes her. He takes her by the hand and moves towards the bed. TO BE CONTINUED

The Woman
There's a woman sitting on the bench Who is she we ask It is the woman who hides her feelings We ask her what is wrong But she always says nothing But we all know how she feels We are all waiting for her to tell us She is my friend One that I care for But our friendship is ruined So It is time to bid fair well Goodbye my friend Please shed no tears Be well and always remember I will always be your friend

Woman Kept In Basement For 24 Years
IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE NEWS OR READ ABOUT THIS IN THE PAPER...YOU REALLY NEED TO...WOW!!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Austrian police have arrested a 73-year-old man accused of locking up his daughter in his cellar for 24 years, and fathering seven children with her. Elisabeth Fritzl, 42, has accused her father, Josef, of 'massive crimes'. DNA tests are being conducted on Ms Fritzl and six surviving children. Elisabeth Fritzl told investigators her father put her to sleep with an anaesthetic on 28 August 1984, handcuffing her in a locked basement. Officially, she was declared a missing person, with Interpol opening an investigation. Local authorities concluded she had been seized by a religious cult. Ms Fritzl told police that she spent years imprisoned in an underground chamber beneath the family home near the eastern town of Amstetten. She said she was 'regularly abused' by her father and their incestuous relationship produced seven children.

Woman In Basment For 24 Yrs
AMSTETTEN, Austria: A 73-year-old Austrian electrical engineer has confessed to holding his daughter captive in a secret, windowless cellar for 24 years and fathering seven children by her, police said yesterday. The case, centred on a nondescript two-storey building in the small industrial town of Amstetten, bears chilling similarities to that of Austrian Natascha Kampusch who spent eight years locked up in a basement before escaping in 2006. Some parts of the cell in which the family were kept were no more than 1.7m high and officials said the basement even contained a padded cell. "This is an appalling crime. I know of no comparable case in Austria," Franz Prucher, head of security for Lower Austria told a news conference. Elisabeth Fritzl, 42, says her father, Josef Fritzl, lured her into the basement of the block in 1984 and drugged and handcuffed her before imprisoning her. Three of her children, aged 19, 18 and five, had been locked up in the basement with her since birth a

A Womans Worth
Ladies - Learn your worth . Men know when she's worth it. In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking, "Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said, "Yes." She began to expound... "As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man...or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money, I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life. "He sat back in his chair , folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said, "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection ment

Woman's Pledge
The Open Toed Shoe Pledge As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules when wearing sandals and other open-toe shoes: I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and& nbsp;touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps. I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe. I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow. I will shave the hairs off my big toe. I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker, mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there. If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it. I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good fri

A Woman's Week At The Gym!!
A WOMAN'S WEEK AT THE GYM If you read this without laughing out loud, there is something wrong with you. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine. Dear Diary, For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress. MONDAY: Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She

Womans Dictionary
DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS 40-ish - 49 Adventurous - Slept with everyone Athletic - No tits Average looking - Ugly Beautiful - Pathological liar Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills Emotionally secure - On medication Feminist - Fat Free spirit - Junkie Friendship first - Former very *friendly* person Fun - Annoying New Age - Body hair in the wrong places Open-minded - Desperate Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing Passionate - Sloppy drunk Professional - Bitch Voluptuous - Very Fat Large frame - Hugely Fat Wants Soul mate - Stalker WOMEN'S ENGLISH 1. Yes = No 2. No = Yes 3. Maybe = No 4. We need = I want 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry 6. We need to talk = you're in trouble 7. Sure, go ahead = you better not 8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later 9. I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron! 10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about? MEN'S ENGLISH 1. I am

Woman Over 30
WOMAN OVER 30 A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting. A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in whom she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 give a hoot what you might think about her or what she's doing. Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved They know what it's like to be unappreciated. A woman over 30 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man

Woman Vs. Men Shower
How to shower like a woman Take off clothing and place it in a sectioned laundry hamper according to lights, darks, whites, man made or natural. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If husband seen along the way cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom. Look at womanly physique in the mirror and stick out belly. Complain and whine about getting fat. Get in shower. Look for facecloth, armcloth, loin cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash hair once with Cucumber and Lamphrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. Wash hair again with Cucumber and Lamphrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins. Condition hair with cucumber and lamphrey conditioner with enhanced natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes. Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red raw. Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair taking at least 15 minutes to make sure that it's all come off.

A Woman's Worth
A woman has strengths that amaze me, she can handle trouble and carry heavy burdens, she holds happiness, love and opinions. She smiles when she feels like screaming. . .she sings when she feels like crying. . . She cries when she is happy, and she laughs when she is afraid. . . Her love is unconditional but there's only one thing wrong with her and that is. . . that sometimes she forgets what she is worth. . .

Woman And Wolf
A healthy woman is much like a wolf, strong life force, life-giving, territorily aware, intuitive and loyal. Yet seperation from her wildish nature causes a woman to become meager, anxious, and fearful. The wild nature carries the medicine for all things. She carries stories, dreams, words and songs. She carries everything a woman needs to be and know. She is the essence of the female soul... With the wild nature as ally and teacher, we see not through two eyes only, but through the many eyes of intuition. With intuition we are like the starry night, we gaze at the world through a thousand eyes. It does not mean to lose one's primary socializations. It means quite the opposite. The wild nature has a vast integrity to it. It means to establish territory, to find one's pack, to be in one's body with certainty and pride, to speak and act in one's behalf, to be aware, to draw on the innate feminine powers of intuition, to find what one belongs to, to

Woman Of My Dreams
She appears to me slowly, softly like lifting black silk from her delicate skin Her eyes are lit with fire and the dancing flames begin to speak to me, as if using her own form of morse code I know how she feels...I know what she wants...and now I can barely breathe As she comes closer, feelings of love, hunger, anticipation, and fear begin to overwhelm me and I am once again at her mercy...feeling empowered and helpless at the same time. She fills that very last need and takes the very last of my will. As the anticipation of her touch grows and desire is all that exists... a burst of light comes forth.

A Womans Poem
A WOMAN'S POEM: Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door. Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to 'how big is my behind?' I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend. A MAN'S POEM: I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course, and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit. The End

A Woman ..
A Women Has Strengths That Amazes The World. She Can Handle Trouble & Carry Heavy Burdens. She Holds Happiness, Love & Opinions. She Smiles When She Feels Like Screaming. She Sings When She Feels Like Crying, Cries When She's Happy & Laughs When She's Afraid. Her Love Is Unconditional! There's Only One Thing Wrong With Her..... 'She Sometimes Forgets What She is WORTH!'

A Womans Worth
In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question "What kind of man are you looking for?" She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking, "Do you really want to know?" Reluctantly, he said, "Yes." She began to expound... "As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can't do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man...or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, "What can you bring to the table?" The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money. She quickly corrected his thought and stated, "I am not referring to money, I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life. "He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain. She said, "I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental s

The Woman
What hides behind The touch girl Everybody sees A woman Who doesn’t Know herself You may find her Pretty Attractive Perhaps even beautiful In her own eyes She does not see Any of these things She only sees the Reflection of one Who has no self worth On who is destined to Never find peace To never stop hiding Behind the masks She wears by: Kat 6-3-08

A Woman's Worth!
By the time the Lord made woman, He was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, ‘Why are you spending so much time on this one?’ And the Lord answered, ‘Have you seen my spec sheet on her?! She has to be completely washable, but not plastic. Have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and be able to run on diet coke and leftovers. Have a lap that can hold four children at one time. Have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart AND she will do everything with only two hands.’ The angel was astounded at the requirements. ‘Only two hands!? No way! And that’s just on the standard model? That’s too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish.’ ‘But I won’t,’ the Lord protested. ‘I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick and can work 18 hour days.’ The angel moved closer and touched the woman. ‘But you have made her so soft, Lor

Woman's / Man's Prayers
A WOMAN'S POEM: Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door. Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to 'how big is my behind?' I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend. A MAN'S POEM: I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with huge boobs and a nice ass who owns a bar on a golf course, and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit. The End

A Womans Dilema
One of women's dilemmas- Getting rid of unwanted hair-- One woman's story All methods have tricked me with their promises of easy, painless removal:the Epilady, the standard razor, the scissors, the Nair, the EpilStop, and now ... The Wax. My night began as any other normal weekday night. I came home, fixed dinner for my family and got everyone settled for the night. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next couple hours: maybe I should use that wax in my medicine cabinet. I made sure no one would need me and I could head for the bathroom in peace. It was one of those cold wax kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the clear strips in your hand, peel them apart, press it on your leg (or wherever).No muss, no fuss. How hard can this be? I mean, I'm not the girliest of girls but I'm mechanically inclined so maybe I can figure out how this works. You'd think. So I pull one of the thin strips out. It's two strips facing each oth

Woman Soldier Among Afghan Dead
Woman soldier among Afghan dead The total number of British troops in Afghanistan is set to rise Four UK soldiers, one of them a woman, have died in Afghanistan after their vehicle was caught in an explosion. The woman, believed to a member of the Intelligence Corps, is the first UK female soldier to have died there. Prime Minister Gordon Brown praised the bravery of the soldiers, who died east of Lashkar Gah in Helmand Province. The dead soldiers' next-of-kin have been informed. Their deaths take to nine the number of UK soldiers killed in Afghanistan in the last 10 days. The Ministry of Defence is not expected to name the soldiers until Thursday. Since 2001, 106 British soldiers died as a result of operations in Afghanistan. 'Dangerous job' Three of the soldiers were killed in the blast and another was pronounced dead at the British military base at Camp Bastion. A fifth soldier wounded in the attack, which happened at 1540 local time on Tuesda

Woman Of Your Flavor
Woman of your flavor men have their different color flavors to call my cats taste you say i smell like the sweet smell of strawberry mix with the very erotic scented candles one man after the next has a way of describing that gold piece as a trick-lets to his mouth he has a thick tongue as he describe the taste of me as wild cherrys and the smell of ripe peaches I'm a woman of your flavor taste it and savor it smells of blueberry, strawberry, cherrys, wild berrys you describe my squirts of cum as little droplets of fruity rain oozing out of my cunt onto your tongue woman of your flavor savor the taste intake of the smell of ripe peaches he call me Maiden Puss' of Flavor Savors you see me as that goddess of tasty flavor puss he describe my breast as large melons and little hot tamales at the tip of them you describe my clitoris as a little cherry my ass, as two large round bowls of jello and my thighs as two thick juicy plums you admire my hou

Woman
Woman Oh sweet blessed goddess... To simply bend you over. Squeeze that delectable rump..Run my hands over your back and cheeks... Kiss one buttock.. Lick the other. Bite you. Nibble. Lick inward, slowly... Towards your ass... Kiss that.. Slide down. Again, slooow. To your lips.. Reaching around, and under, to see if I might possibly reach your nips, with at least, my finger tips. Licking.. Tasting.. Sucking.. Loving.. Wanting.. Nibbling.. Teasing.... Fingers pulling.. Stroking... Pushing in.. Still sucking.. Pressing. Pushing... Tounging your ass whilst your hot hole, my hand is fucking.. Listening to your fever rise.. Making ME high! Getting off on the sound of your loud cries,... Quick sighs..Wishing this were reality.. not merely some exercise in ability to, with words share the things about which I fantasize.. Make you SCREAM! Leave no doubt. Yet even still, wondering if this could possibly be a dream... I want to taste your sweet cream... Lick it off of you.. Rub it into you..

Woman's Touch
The sensation of a woman’s touch Can be overwhelming to most men It can be sensitive, it can be tender At times a man cannot sustain the joy He desperately craves His cock raises its head And arches to her inviting touch The grip of her fingers around his shaft He longs for the kiss of her lips On the sensitive part of his body When she licks the purple head He moans for more and more Her lips parting, she engulfs him fully Wet tongue along his shaft Her lips pressed tightly against his balls A few more strokes is all he needs He reaches for her head, clasping it tighter He bucks and bucks, reaching that delicate moment She can feel the quivering flesh in her mouth As he releases the torrent of pleasure.

Woman
I now venerate the verification of love's values, as it vents, vainly vanquished Resulting in love's rules in re-living Romeo's resurrection relinquished Whether the weather be whatever to whoever whenever Love's line, living like light as it illuminates the livid eyes of the lover Yet damaged and diminished by the domineering doctrines dictated by man's decisions The mundane marks, made up maneuvers, manipulated by man's multiple matriculation Consensus, considering only Casanova candidates, skin color, car and case Great guys gather give great gist, girls give guys grimace Our opinion of Romeo overshadows the ongoing emotion, opening out love's oasis today His judgment of Juliet, jubilant and jejune, causing him to juxtapose and what his opinionated "Justified Jennifer," has to say. All empathize as an amateur is accepted and the amazing left asking The perfect player, palpates her part, and puts her through pain till his parting The boomerang bou

Woman Accused Of Smacking Beau With Toilet Seat
Woman accused of smacking beau with toilet seat Mon Jul 14, 7:22 PM ET FORT PIERCE, Fla. - Police arrested a couple after the woman allegedly hit her boyfriend with a toilet seat. The woman, 18, told police that she found her boyfriend smoking cocaine in their bathroom and turned on the shower to try and wash away the drugs. The pair argued and when he refused to give up the drugs, authorities say the woman hit him with the toilet seat. The boyfriend was charged with cocaine possession and later released on bond. The woman faces a battery charge and was released without posting bond.

Woman Don't Care To Know
Men here are just a few things women don't want to know when your trying to hook up with us ! You hooked up with the hot barmaid You lived with your parents until recently The bad things your buddies are up to The one that got away You look at porn a number of times a week I wouldn't want a guy to tell me about the one that got away, especially if he was still hooked on her.

Woman Of Fubar Unite, For My Purposes
I need boob salutes!! Fuck this point whoring crap. Aren't you all tired of the morons on this site having a longer list of boob salutes, let us unit as females (no moobs :P) and send me salutes so I can be a complete annoyance to Bounty Hunter and company. No nips necessary, I have my own touching my knees right now Just write "monica rules" across your cleavage I will be happy to return the favor, although that is a creepy reason for helping a sister out.

Woman
BECAREFUL IF YOU MAKE A WOMAN CRY,BECAUSE GOD COUNTS HER TEARS.THE WOMAN COME OUT OF A MANS RIB.NOT FROM HIS FEET TO BE WALKED ON. .NOT FROM HIS HEAD TO BE SURERIOR BUT FROM HIS SIDE TO BE EQUAL. UNDER THE ARM TO BE PROTECTED,AND NEXT TOO THE HEART TO BE LOVED.

Woman Says Jesus Appears In Cell Phone Photo
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Woman's Poem
WOMAN'S POEM Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to 'how big is my behind?' I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend. MAN'S POEM I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and loves sports. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit

Woman Of My Dreams
Woman of my Dreams by LateNiteFantasy© In those empty moments Thoughts of you fill my days When life allows the time I slowly slip into a daze Every time I close my eyes I see your amazing smile Like a modern day computer Your beauty is on file Hair so silky and smooth Eyes that pierce the soul Luscious and pouty lips Are only parts o’ the whole Your beauty rivals Aphrodite She holds no candle to you Though you have your doubts Your sensuality shines through I see you in my dreams Be it day or night Trying to control my feelings With all my strength and might Our friendship constantly grows Long destined to be more My love will never die In hopes you may open that door You are special and loved I will cherish you forever You’ve captured my heart It is yours forever

Womanhood, Citizenship, And The New Republic In America
In the late 1700's the idea of "Republican Motherhood" was popularized to supplement full citizenship for women, but the educational opportunities meant to sedate desires for full citizenship empowered the female voice. "Republican Motherhood" is the late 1700's concept of educating girls and women in order to raise families and instruct children, primarily boys, how to properly be a citizen. Following a series of advances in women’s education in the 1780's, new educated women became voices for the American Mother and Woman in a challenge for equal rights. Some women such as Abigail Adams, wife of John Adams, simultaneously championed the idea of female equality but also worked within the system to educate a new generation. Other women voice opinions of sexual equality in writing or speeches such as Eliza Wilkinson and Priscilla Mason, these educated women bring to light the enlightenment they have received yet the inability to exercise their talents. These sorts of discourses provide

Woman Be Proud
woman, be proud of who you are. have no man take over and make you see different. never let your spirit be broken. damn the perception and stop the incest. keep your eyes on the prize. do not let a little verbal shaming slow you down. aim for greatness, not goodness. do not try to win approval from your opponents. merely fight to win. revolutions may also arise when persons of great ability and second to none in their merits, are treated dishonorably by those who themselves enjoy the highest honors. woman be proud, stand strong, and never let go of the dream you may have.

Woman - النساء
النساء مخلوقــات عجيبــة If you kiss her, you are not a gentleman لو قبلتها , تكون رجلاً غير محتــرم If you don't, you are not a man ولو لم تقبلها, تكون لست رجلاً If you praise her, she thinks you are lying إذا مدحتهــا تعتقــد أنـــك كـــــذاب If you don't, you are good for nothing وإذا لم تمدح

Woman & Wolves
Women and Wolves A healthy woman is much like a wolf, strong life force, life-giving, territorily aware, intuitive and loyal. Yet seperation from her wildish nature causes a woman to become meager, anxious, and fearful. The wild nature carries the medicine for all things. She carries stories, dreams, words and songs. She carries everything a woman needs to be and know. She is the essence of the female soul... With the wild nature as ally and teacher, we see not through two eyes only, but through the many eyes of intuition. With intuition we are like the starry night, we gaze at the world through a thousand eyes. It does not mean to lose one's primary socializations. It means quite the opposite. The wild nature has a vast integrity to it. It means to establish territory, to find one's pack, to be in one's body with certainty and pride, to speak and act in one's behalf, to be aware, to draw on the innate feminine powers of intuition, to find what one belongs to, to rise wi

A Womans Worth
By the time the Lord made woman,He was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said' Why are you spending so much time on this one?'And the Lord answered, 'Have you seen my spec sheet on her ? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart and she will do everything with only two hands The angel was astounded at the requirements. 'Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish. 'But I won't, ' the Lord protested 'I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days. The angel moved closer and touched the woman. 'But you have made her so soft, Lord. 'She is soft,' the Lord agreed,

A Woman
A says Woman is attractive flower B says Woman is beautiful gift C says Woman is great source of comfort D says woman has a sweet dialect E says Eastern or western, woman is the worthy F says woman is central figure of family G says woman always glitters with the rays of her partner H says woman has holy spirits I says woman has basic institution in her lap J says woman is a full of joy K says woman is head of kisses L says woman is lovely thing M says woman is symbol of modesty N says nails increase the beauty of woman O says woman is an pretty ornament P says woman is princess Q says woman is queen R says woman is rare gift S says woman is a main source of survival the human being T says woman has true spirits of love U says woman is an peaceful umbrella V says woman is valley of love W says woman is wafer X says woman has sweet kisses Y says woman is your jewellary z says woman has great zeal

Woman's Dictonary
I found this to be funny Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet. Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman. Barbeque(bar*bi*q) n. You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but, he, "made the dinner." Blonde Jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand them. Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n Gotta get married in a church. Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus...breathe...push...good girl" Clothes Dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks. Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half-pound bag of peanut M&Ms. Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game.

Woman Use A Total Of 9 Words
9 WORDS WOMEN USE (1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house. (3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine. (4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It! (5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.) (6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before decidi

Woman In Cow Costume Arrested By Jennifer Baker • Jbaker@enquirer.com • September 30, 2008
MIDDLETOWN - A 32-year-old woman was sentenced to a month in the Middletown Jail Monday after she was arrested and charged with chasing children, blocking traffic and yelling at police - all while wearing a cow costume. Advertisement Michele Allen pleaded guilty Monday in Middletown Municipal Court to one count of disorderly conduct, court officials said. Middletown police said she chased children in the 3100 block of Wilbraham Road and urinated on a neighbor's porch Saturday night. An officer ordered her to go home and stay there. About 11 p.m., police were called to the 2400 block of North Verity Avenue after receiving a report that a woman in a cow costume was blocking traffic. Allen had alcohol on her breath, slurred her words, was belligerent and swore at the officer, a report states. http://news.cincinnati.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080930/NEWS0107/309290035 http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2008/0930082cow1.html now she give new meanin

Woman Taking The X Back
You couldn't figure this out? Guys who beat up on women either physically or mentally are nothing but pieces of shit scumbags who need to have the their balls cut off with a dull knife. Oh, did i mention nice and slow.. DON'T TAKE EM BACK!

A Woman's Heart
A Woman's heart is a mystery a man just can't understand, Sometimes all she needs is the gentle touch of his hand. If a man could for just an instant feel what her heart feels, He'd finally know what's truely real. If he could paint her feelings into a work of art, He would have painted a masterpiece of a woman's heart. If a man could touch her soul deep inside, Her heart from him she'd never have to hide. If a man would remember the romance from the start, He's never forget the true love within a woman's heart. Written By Wilma S. Hill copyright August 2008

Woman Stabs Elderly Husband In Neck With Steak Knives
BRADENTON FL. - A Manatee County woman has been arrested for stabbing her elderly husband with Alzheimer's in the neck with two steak knives. 79-year-old Harold Tanner suffers from Alzheimer's and is cared for by his wife 52-year-old Deborah and his step-son William Davis at their home on the 4700 block of 61st Avenue Terr. W. in Bradenton. A Manatee County Sheriff's report says on Tuesday around 11am, Mrs. Tanner stabbed Mr. Tanner in the neck with two steak knives at the same time, while Harold was lying in his bed. Deborah then called 911 to report the stabbing. When Deputies arrived Mrs. Tanner was at the front door and admitted to stabbing her husband. She said she stabbed him because he needed a rest. Mr. Tanner received two stab wounds and was transported to Bayfront Medical Center via Bayflite in stable condition. William Davis was asleep inside a bedroom and had no knowledge of the incident until he woke up to the noise inside the house when deputies arrive

Woman's Perfection !!
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. Keep reading-they get better!!! --------------------------------------------------------------------------- WOMEN'S REVENGE 'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. 'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked. 'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.' --------------------------------------------------------------------------- UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) I kno

Womanizer Britney Spears
I don't know what it is with this song,but I LOVE it!! I never thought she'd come back from being crazy,but I believe everyone deserves a second chance. I have the video in my stash if you wanna check that out too! Superstar Where you from, how's it going? I know you Gotta clue, what you're doing? You can play brand new to all the other chicks out here But I know what you are, what you are, baby Look at you Gettin' more than just a re-up Baby, you Got all the puppets with their strings up Fakin' like a good one, but I call 'em like I see 'em I know what you are, what you are, baby Womanizer Woman-Womanizer Your a womanizer oh womanizer oh your a womanizer baby (You, you you ah you you you ah) Womanizer womanizer womanizer Boy, don't try to front I know just what you are (x2) You got me going You're oh so charming But I can't do it You Womanizer Boy, don't try to front I know just what you are (x2) You say I'm crazy I got your crazy Your nothing but

A Woman With Heart!
Cheryl, Cheryl, what can I say .. This is a beautiful woman that I met In person from Fu one day. A convertible ride was tops for the day even though it was 50 degrees, heat blasting.. Top down, we were off on our way! What to do having just met.. What could I possibly say to a stranger from the net? Worries quickly were put to bed.. We clicked immediately and never lacked For things to be said. This person has been my DEAREST FRIEND since.. A true beauty inside and out.. Someone I hope to never again live without! Cheryl .. you are precious to me! You know me so well, sympathise when I hurt and try so hard to make it better. You worry about me more than you should and the love in your heart for me is more than I could have ever hoped for when you walked through the Ramada door on that so very fun day! You are my whore .. giggle .. and I LOVE YOU DEARLY!! Be true to yourself and NEVER let anyone change your inner beauty!! Now get your butt to Savannah! .. ;)

Woman Obliges After Husband Begs To Be Shot
CENTENNIAL, Colo. – Authorities said a woman who shot her husband in the knee won't face charges because he begged her to do it. The Arapahoe County Sheriff's office said a 35-year-old woman accused her husband of being drunk and becoming violent during an argument. She took control of a handgun during the dispute and claimed her husband begged her to shoot him and told her to 'finish it' after she fired a shot. The sheriff's office said the 34-year-old husband was uncooperative with deputies before he was taken into custody and hospitalized. He was now being held at the Arapahoe County jail after his wife accused him of forcing her into the bathroom and holding a gun to her head before the shooting. He faces charges of felony menacing, third-degree assault and false imprisonment.

Womanizer
Superstar, where you from, how's it going? I know you, gotta clue whatcha doing You can play brand new to all the other chicks out here But I know what you are, what you are, baby Look at you, getting more than just a re-up Baby you, got all the puppets with their strings up Faking like a good one, but I call 'em like I see 'em I know what you are, what you are, baby Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer, Oh womanizer, oh you're a womanizer, baby You you you are, you you you are Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer (womanizer) Boy don't try to front I (I) know just (just) what you are-are-are Boy don't try to front I (I) know just (just) what you are-are-are (You) You got me going (You) You're oh so charming (You) But I can't do it (You) You womanizer Boy don't try to front I (I) know just (just) what you are-are-are Boy don't try to front I (I) know just (just) what you are-are-are (You) You say I'm crazy (You) I got yo

Woman Accused Of Tending Bar In The Buff
It's a different take on belly up to the bar. A 24-year-old female bartender in the Mississippi River community of Alton was charged with misdemeanor lewd entertainment after apparently working in the buff. Police arrested the woman last Friday at the Pub Room after someone called to complain. Authorities said the woman had managed to put on a shirt before officers arrived. It's not the first time it's happened in that area. Last month in nearby Jersey County, a 33-year-old bartender at The Cabin Incorporated in Delhi was charged with public indecency after sheriff's deputies found her working nude.

Woman Stop And Think....
A DAMN FINE EXPLANATION... The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman and was somewhat upset -- 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce straight away!' And the husband replied 'Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened.' 'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed, 'but they'll be the last words you'll ever say to me!! And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was thin, poorly dressed and very dirty.. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last nig

Woman's Ass Study
Women's Ass Size Study There is a new study just released by the Canadian Psychiatric Association about women and how they feel about their asses. The results are pretty shocking: 1. Only 5% of women surveyed feel their ass is too big. 2. 10% of women surveyed feel their ass is too small. 3. The remaining 85% say they don't care; they love him; he's a good man and they would have married him anyway.

A Woman's Love.....
A woman's love can withstand your selfishness, forgive your harsh words, believe in you when you give no hope ...a woman's love knows no hatred, but survives on her undying devotion to make you happy.... A woman's love would ALWAYS find a way , she would comfort you in her arms when and just let a grown man cry , she would NEVER judge you ( like the way you always seem to find fault )... a woman's love forgets yesterday and looks forward to tommorow..... Some men seem to think of us as weak creatures filled with emotions ...we are always nagging and fighting ...we never know when to hush, never good enough to be loved , there is always something we could never do enough of ..... But these men don't know the hidden strength of a woman's love ...because if they only knew , shame would engulf them and they would fall to their knees.........for the woman they so love to hate and take advantage of, has been there all along .NEVER doubting the good man that he was and believing still the goo

Womanizer
Superstar Where you from, hows it going? I know you Gotta clue, what you're doing? You can play brand new to all the other chicks out here But I know what you are, what you are, baby Look at you Gettin more than just re-up Baby, you Got all the puppets with their strings up Fakin like a good one, but I call 'em like I see 'em I know what you are, what you are, baby Womanizer, Woman, Womanizer You're a Womanizer, oh Womanizer oh You're a Womanizer, baby You you you are, You you you are Womanizer, Womanizer, Womanizer (Womanizer) Boy, don't try to front I know just what you are Boy, don't try to front I know just what you are You got me goin' You're oh so charmin' But I can do it Womanizer Boy, don't try to front I know just what you are Boy, don't try to front I know just what you are You say i'm crazy I got your crazy You're nothin' but a Womanizer Daddy-O You got the swagger of champion Too bad for you You just cant find the right companio

A Woman Meets A Man In A Bar.
They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together. They get back to his place, and as he shows her around his apartment. She notices that one wall of his bedroom is completely filled with soft, sweet, cuddly teddy bears. There are three shelves in the bedroom, with hundreds and hundreds of cute, cuddly teddy bears carefully placed in rows, covering the entire wall! It was obvious that he had taken quite some time to lovingly arrange them and she was immediately touched by the amount of thought he had put into organizing the display. There were small bears all along the bottom shelf, medium-sized bears covering the length of the middle shelf, and huge, enormous bears running all the way along the top shelf. She found it strange for an obviously masculine guy to have such a large collection of Teddy Bears, She is quite impressed by his sensitive side. but doesn't mention this to him. They share a bottle of wine and continue talking and, after awhile, she finds herself thinking, 'Oh m

Woman's
WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. Keep reading-they get better!!! WOMEN'S REVENGE 'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse. 'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked. 'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.' UNDERSTANDING WOMEN (A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) I know I'm not going to understand women. I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still

Woman
♥♥♥ Creation of woman from the rib of man She was not made of his head to top him nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him but out of his side to be equal with him under his arm, to be protected and near his heart to be beloved.. ♥♥♥

Woman
take a good look at me tell me what you see the epitome of a woman pure, sensual, beautiful that's me my voice, my charm, my eyes, my smile epitome of a woman brilliant free child my walk, my touch, my grace, my hair the symbol of a woman that's me i'm rare my glow, my look, my love, spirit wild my lips, my hips, my legs shy child Cosmo, Essence and Vanity Fair could search the world forever to catch a glimpse of my stare priceless, untouched, unblemished unraveled temperament like coffee strong yet mild who am I? you ask, listen don't speak the essence of a woman what you crave for my keep a rose, fine wine, ageless that's me front page articles applaud my name my power, my beauty my nature, my fame elegant, eccentric, abstract is my wink my shadow takes photos that make Hollywood think you see, cameras can't capture what can't be tamed my charisma sensuality my soul, my reign still confused, don't worry even open eyes can't see who I am you w

Woman Like Me
[VERSE 1:] Do you think You could fall for a woman like me 'Cause I find it hard to trust I need too much And I really don't believe in love, no no Do you think That I could be the girl of your dreams Sometimes I don't let things go Get emotional And sometimes I'm just out of control [CHORUS:] You need to stop for a minute Before you get too, deep up in it (Too deep) 'Cause everything ain't what it seems It's hard loving a woman A woman like me (Woman like me) You need to think about it Before you get hooked on the venom And can't live without it (No no) Can't believe everything you see It's hard loving a woman A woman like me [VERSE 2:] Do you think That I could be the one that you seek 'Cause baby I'm one step ahead You're two steps behind But baby I don't mind Do you think That I can make you real happy baby Just don't get me wrong My loving is so strong But I ain't tryna lead you on [CHORUS:] You need to stop for a minute (No no) Before

A Woman's Man
You are a woman's man The best qualities of a man is found in you To a woman, you are the treasure That only God would have for himself An angel in disguise in a human form You have the goodness a man can only hope for but none possess You are a wonderful living That one would hope to grow old with To held your hands in every passage of life Till the end of the road You are a woman's man Your path is filed with beautiful women Gazing at your fine soul Each of them wants you To be their guardian of their solitude Feeding on your love As if you are the only man In the galaxy You are a woman's man I wish you were mine I wish the distance between us falls Our eyes will meet one day In real That, when you are old and grey I'm the one Sitting beside you by the fire Reading to you And when night falls we shall sleep Alongside each other Sharing the same dream

Woman
She gave life. She is a wife. She is a mother and she is a friend. She is a sister and a survivor to the end. Appreciate her, we don't dare. Ask her worries, we don't care. Wipe away her tears, they are invisible as air. She works, cooks and cleans. She laughs, helps comfort, and hides her pain. When you struggle she pulls you through. All this is she and what do we do? Complain and create a mess. Provide stress and leave her feeling depressed. Push her away and ignore her advice. Tell her she is nothing without thinking twice. She was raped, tortured and abused. Told she was nothing and would always be used just for pleasure, forget her pain. She swallows her pride, put her feelings aside. Does as you need in order for you to be free. Ignores your ignorance and tolerates your flaws. You call her Bitch, Slut, How and Tramp. She answers with pride, dignity and a complete loss of self. You call her nothing. I call her Strong, Smart, Sensual, Caring, Giving, Surviv

Woman In Love
Life is a moment in space When the dream is gone Its a lonelier place I kiss the morning goodbye But down inside you know We never know why The road is narrow and long When eyes meet eyes And the feeling is strong I turn away from the wall I stumble and fall But I give you it all... I am a woman in love And I do anything To get you into my world And hold you within Its a right I defend Over and over again What do I do? With you eternally mine In love there is No measure of time We planned it all at the start That you and i Would live in each others hearts We may be oceans away You feel my love I hear what you say No truth is ever a lie I stumble and fall But I give you it all I am a woman in love And Im talking to you Do you know how it feels? What a woman can do Its a right That I defend over and over again......

Woman Threw Baby At Officer (2007, Old)
Police: Woman Threw Baby At Officer Police Say Mother Threw Baby 5 Feet POSTED: 3:31 pm MDT September 18, 2007 UPDATED: 5:13 pm MDT September 18, 2007 Woman Accused Of Throwing Baby According to court documents, officers entered the home of Evelyn Doninger, 23, of North East, Md., after smelling a strong odor of marijuana. Inside the home, police noticed a hand-rolled cigarette, a bag of marijuana, and other drug paraphernalia. Two men were inside with Doninger and her children. Officers attempted to arrest Doninger, when she became "incredibly irate," stood up from a chair and threw her 6-month-old at least 5 feet at one of the troopers, police said. The child struck the trooper's chest and he caught the baby just before it hit the floor. Doninger then shoved the trooper, striking both him and the baby. The 6-month-old was not seriously injured. Doninger was released from jail and faces eight different child abuse and drug charges.

Woman V/s Men.funny Lol But Omg How True It Is In My Life Cheers Fu Crew.
Women V/S Men How to treat a Woman: Wine her. Dine her. Call her. Hold her. Surprise her. Compliment her. Smile at her. Listen to her. Laugh with her. Cry with her. Romance her. Encourage her. Believe in her. Pray with her. Pray for her. Cuddle with her. Shop with her. Give her jewelry. Buy her flowers. Hold her hand. Write love letters to her. Go to the ends of the earth and back again for her. === How To Treat a Man: Show up naked. Bring chicken wings. Don't block the TV CHEERS (DIAMOND DANDY RANDY)

Woman
So i guess i'm single again. My wonderful ex decided that she was so i guess that means i must be. Apparently she didn't need to inform me of that fact, i had to go on the internet and find that out! How nice, considering she is pregnant and its supposed to be my child. I think the next time i hear someone say they just want to find a decent man i'm just going to turn around and blow my fucking head off! You wonder why men are assholes.... sometimes its because heartless bitches made us that way!

Woman And Man Poems
Woman’s Poem Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep, one who's handsome, smart and strong, one who loves to listen long. One who thinks before he speaks, one who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed, when I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door. Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind, knows what to answer to 'how big is my behind?' I pray that this man will love me to no end, and always be my very best friend. Man’s Poem I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course, and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a crap. The End

Woman
"It is not meet that a son should set aside his mother, taking her place. Whosoever respecteth not his mother, the most sacred being after his God, is unworthy of the name of son. "Listen, then, to what I say unto you: Respect woman, for she is the mother of the universe, and all the truth of divine creation lies in her. "She is the basis of all that is good and beautiful, as she is also the germ of life and death. On her depends the whole existence of man, for she is his natural and moral support. "She gives birth to you in the midst of suffering. By the sweat of her brow she rears you, and until her death you cause her the gravest anxieties. Bless her and worship her, for she is your one friend, your one support on earth. "Respect her, uphold her. In acting thus you will win her love and her heart. You will find favor in the sight of God and many sins shall be forgiven you. "In the same way, love your wives and respect them; for they will be mothers tomorrow, and

A Woman...
Quote of the day: "Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit."

A Woman's Treasure Box
Camel toe (verse #1) I like’em fat like a hot-dog bun, Wonder bread style with a juicy a$$ c**t, If it’s scrunchy and small, well it aint much fun, I like a coochie I can grab with a camel toe front, Keep it shaved bald, I don’t want no hair on my tongue, When I eat a fat pu**y, it’s like eating a lunch, And when she squirts on my face then I know I’m done, I got a d**k like a sausage, let me put it in your guts, Forget a lolly-pop, I got a d**k you can munch, I need a c**t like a holster for this big a$$ gun, You got a big a$$ butt, then I give you a plus, But if that vagina is skinny, then I’ll call you a runt, I’m a fat pu**y chaser, I stay on the run, These girls be looking good but their pu**y is scum, I don’t mean to hurt feelings but you’re hurting my nuts, I need more pu**y cushion if you want me to bust, *** I see you sexy ladies, yeah you want me to lust, If you aint got a fat camel toe then what the fu*k is the rush? (verse #2) Camel toe, camel toe,

A Woman's Week At The Gym
If you read this without laughing out loud, there is something wrong with you. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into a regular workout routine. Dear Diary, For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress. ________________________________ MONDAY: Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda

A Womans Prayer
He didn't like the casserole And he didn't like my cake. He said my biscuits were too hard... Not like his mother used to make. I didn't perk the coffee right He didn 't like the stew, I didn't mend his socks The way his mother used to do. I pondered for an answer I was looking for a clue. Then I turned around and smacked the shit out of him.... Like his mother used to do.

Woman Drivers
This morning on the Interstate, I looked over to my left and there was a Woman In a brand new Cadillac Doing 65 mph With her Face up next to her Rear view mirror Putting on her eyeliner. I looked away For a couple seconds ! And when I looked back she was Halfway over in my lane, Still working on that makeup. As a man, I don't scare easily. But she scared me so much; I dropped My electric shaver , Which knocked The donut Out of my other hand. In all The confusion of trying To straighten out the car Using my knees against The steering wheel, it knocked my cell phone away from my ear which fell into the coffee between my legs, splashed, and burned Big Jim and the Twins, ruined the damn phone, Soaked my trousers, and disconnected an important call. > Damn women drivers!!

A Womans Love
I have felt it And I have held it I have known A woman's love I have tasted And I have wasted A woman's love And I know I'll never understand All the little things that make It grand A woman's love And I know I'll never come Face to face With any thing that takes the Place Of a woman's love Well I have kiss it Tried to resist it I have missed A woman's love And I have hated Taken for granted A woman's love Well I have needed And I have pleaded And I have lost A woman's love And I have worshipped And I have cursed it A woman's love Well I adore it Thank god for it A woman's love

A Womans Worth
By the time the Lord made woman, He was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, 'Why are you spending so much time on this one?' And the Lord answered, 'Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart -and she will do everything with only two hands.' The angel was astounded at the requirements. 'Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day.

A Woman Who Needs No Introduction!
One of the most beautiful, generous and caring women I have the pleasure of knowing....Julie aka.... She is my hero, my inspiration and someone I am truly honored to call friend. Please take a moment and show this incredible woman some love. If you don't already have her as a friend make sure you add her! ♥ T.R.O.U.B.L.E ♥PROUD ARMY MOM~ OWNER OF RING OF FIRE ♥ This bulletin brought to with love by... ♊aGEM4life♊ ☆SinnersFamily☆SBG♥Wife of Ike™♥ FUOwnedBy allenwhet

The Woman I Love...
The Woman I love The woman I love is in the arms of another Though apart of me is still with her Time and tide will never change how I feel Inside my heart I know my love for her is real Tonight she is far apart from me And my tears she will never see Alone in this empty house I sleep Knowing her love I could never keep The woman I love, loves another Even though I thought we'd always be together Though tonight I must except defeat Without her in my life I will never be complete The woman I love is gone With her life she moved on Into the arms of another man Though he could never love her the way I can

A Woman Whom I Never Met..
A woman whom I never met, Lived in a land I never knew. How could I know what love is? Yet, I do, I do, I do! The woman I never met, Was real and proud and strong; Her eyes were deeply set, And she could sing a song. And she could make a joke, And laugh when in the mood; But long before she spoke, I guessed her solitude. The woman I never met, A shadow in my mind; I saw her silhouette, But will I ever find, That shadows can come alive, Making my dream complete? But then will she arrive, The woman I've yet to meet? All my days alone, And all my nights it seems; I have known a woman unknown, Who shares my secret dreams. But still my dream one seems to hide, When really she should be at my side. The woman I never met Is half a world away; She may not find me, yet I'm waiting for the day. The day I go out to meet The woman I've never met. -Dominic Zingale

A Woman!
A woman has amazing strengths. She can deal with stress and carry heavy burdens. She smiles when she feels like screaming. She sings when she feels like crying. She cries when she is happy and laughs when she is afraid. Her love is unconditional. There is only one thing wrong with her. She forgets what she is worth! Pass this to every beautiful woman you know and remind her that she is unique!...

A Woman’s Random Thoughts
Skinny people piss me off! Especially when the say things like, “You know sometimes I forget to eat.” Now, I have forgotten my address, my mother’s maiden name, and my keys. But I’ve never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat. A friend of mine confused her valium with her birth control pills. She had 14 kids, but she doesn’t give a damn. They ;keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn’t all that communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, “Body, how’d you like to go th the six o’clock class in vigorous toning?” Clear as a bell my body said, “listen bitch. . . do it and die.” The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing (and then they marry him.) I( read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, smokingtoo much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a perfect day. I know what Victoria’s secret i

Woman's Guide To Suicide (it's A Joke)
An old woman was sitting in her living room mourning the loss of her dear husband. As she sat holding his picture, she made up her mind to commit suicide. She thought of many different ways to kill herself. Poison. Hanging. She finally settled on shooting herself in the heart. She wasn't sure she knew exactly where her heart was and decided to call the doctor. She wanted to do this right. "Doctor," she says. "where is the human heart?" "Well" he replies "on a woman it would be just below the left breast." The old woman was rushed to the hospital later that day with a gunshot wound to her left knee.

A Womans Attempt At Beauty
All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, > > painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the wax. > > > > My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, and > > play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my > > > > mind for the next few hours: "Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of > > the medicine > > cabinet." So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. > > > > It was one of those "cold wax" kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you > > just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them > > > > apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair > > right off.... > > No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? > > > > I mean, I'm not a Genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure > > > > this out. > > > > (YA THIN

7,012 Woman I've Met On The Internet Since 2003 And Not A Single One I Dated
Yes, as hard as it is to beleive, I have talked with 7,012 different woman on the internet stemming from July, 2003 when I got my first computer and not a single one exept the druggie Christine 'Too much to dream / Lips like morphine' [Yes she is on morphine] I actualy saw, met or dated for more than a day. Simpy put, I just don't know how to accknowledge, keep, interest or even ask out a woman. Alot of them already were in a relationship or were/ are mommas.

The Woman Is My True Sunshine
She is the sunwhen I am on the oceanalways seeing the darknessshe gives me directionFighting the tumulous seafearing for my lifealways hoping and prayingfor the sun to come out and direct meLooking for the warmthof her sweet eyesseeking the warmthof her arms holding me tightHer arms are stronggiving me reassurancethat I can keep fighting the seaalways knowing she will be thereCopyright ©2009

Woman Guide
Don' t close it. Read till the end.This is reeeeealy helpful for guys :)When she walks away from you mad= [Follow her]When she stares at your lips= [Kiss her]When she pushes you or hit' s you= [ Grab her and don' t let go]When she starts cursing at you= [Kiss her and tell her you love her]When she' s quiet = [Ask her what' s wrong]When she ignores you= [Give her your attention]When she pulls away= [Pull her back]When you see her at her worst = [Tell her she' s beautiful]When you see her start crying= [Just hold her and don' t say a word]When you see her walking= [Sneak up and hug her waist from behind]When she' s scared= [Protect her]When she lay' s her head on your shoulder= [Tilt her head up and kiss her]When she steals your favorite hat= [Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night]When she teases you= [Tease her back and make her laugh]When she doesn' t answer for a long time= [Reassure her that every thing is okay]When she looks at you with doubt = [ Back your self up with the T

Woman
Woman was created from man's ribto be by his sidenot under his foot as he run's out the doornor under his hand when he has heard enoughMan from whom we are createdto protect and shield usto listen to her feelingsand honor us in his lifeFor whom we are a partnerA sounding boardAnother view of the worldThrough the eyes of the opposite imikimi - Customize Your World!

A Womans Wrath
a man maybe a fierce warrior he may even be fearless in battle pain may be nothing to him but a woman scorned her wrath is something that will shake you to the core for a woman scorned uses not only her wits her anger fuels her passion her passion to see you pay for the crimes you cast against her next time you think of crossing a woman think of this can you see the dagger placed at your throat while you slumber beware a woman scorned feel the wrath pierce your flesh

Woman And A Fork
Woman and a Fork There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things 'in order,' she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes.She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in. Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her.'There's one more thing,' she said excitedly. 'What's that?' came the Pastor's reply. 'This is very important,' the young woman continued. 'I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand.' The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to say. 'That surprises you, doesn't it? ' the young woman asked. 'Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request,' said the Pastor. The young woman explained.'My grandmot

Woman Finds 'twilight' Sequel Script In Trash
ST. LOUIS - A St. Louis beauty salon owner accidentally happened upon one of the hottest Hollywood scripts - the pages from an upcoming "Twilight" sequel - in a trash bin. Casey Ray found two scripts, one for the vampire sequel "New Moon" and one for a different movie titled "Memoirs." She decided to return them to the studio making the films. In return, she was invited to attend the movies' premieres, her lawyer said.Ray recently was waiting for her fiance to finish work when she spotted two scripts in a trash container. She was outside a hotel where actors were staying during a St. Louis shoot for the upcoming George Clooney movie, "Up in the Air."It's not clear how the scripts wound up in the bin. ABC 7 Talkback:Click Here to Comment on this Story The Clooney movie includes actress Anna Kendrick, who is also in the "Twilight" vampire movie. A spokeswoman for Kendrick, Lisa Perkins, said the actress wouldn't have left scripts lying around.When Ray found the scripts, she co

Womans Week At The Gym...=)
A WOMAN'S WEEK AT THE GYM*If you read this without laughing out loud, there is something wrongwith you. This is dedicated to everyone who ever attempted to get into aregular workout routine.Dear Diary,For my birthday this year, my Husband (the dear) purchased a week ofpersonal training at the local health club for me.Although I am still in great shape since being a high school footballcheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go aheadand give it a try..I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer namedChristo, who identified himself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor andmodel for athletic clothing and swim wear.My husband seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The clubencouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.________________________________MONDAY:Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it waswell worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Christo waitingfor me. He is something of a Greek go

Woman Pie
Woman. These woman. Why do they tease? Play with a guy then expect them not to be mean. They say we create bitches, but assholes don't just generate themselves. I think we coincide like a chef and his pie because one can't exist without the other and I'm definitely not the pie bitch. If anything I made you from scratch. I built you up from the crust and threw my fruit in the batch. You were "Oh So Sweet!" Now what the fuck happened did i burn you and leave you there too long. Or you naturally became bitter because things begin to wither and decay with expiration. I aim to have the best and this was not my expectation. So why should i be deserving of an explanation. I'm a master of my craft, a culinary expert. There is plenty of recipes on these shelves so let me open one up and and take another look for myself.

A Woman's Heart
A Woman's heart is in her home. from the very 1st day she crosses that threshold through the Front Door. Her artistic sense of self wakes up to creating a sanctuary for her family. Everything has to be just right in colors, from the paint down to the blinds, chair rail, wall paper, stencil art. etc etc etc... It becomes her expression of Love for her family who she holds closest to her heart. It is her sole investment she has created in her heart that is priceless to anything in the world. A woman's heart is shattered when through no fault of her own that life closes one chapter of her book and moves onto a new one closing the door for the final time in her home. She leaves a piece of her heart with the house that will forever be there for other women to continue the trend. She worries for her children, who are dependent on her strength to keep the family safe. She doesn't worry about the emotional failure she feels from the love lost of a companion for the entire family even

A Woman's Ultimate Fantasy!
A Woman's Ultimate Fantasy A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying a cocktail after work one night, when the bar door opened and the most gorgeous hunk of a man she had ever seen entered. He was tall, muscular, and handsome, with thick dark hair and beautiful, sparkling green eyes, and his every movement was so masculine and sensuous that the woman could not help but stare. The man noticed that he was the object of the woman's rapt attention, and with a sly, sexy smile, approached her. Blushing, she prepared to apologize for staring, but he leaned close and whispered in her ear. "I'll do anything," he whispered in a deep, soft voice. "Anything, absolutely anything you want, anything you have ever fantasized, for fifty dollars. There's just one condition..." Trembling with anticipation, the woman asked him the condition. The man said, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words."

Woman Of The World
Woman of the world did stand on the hearth; looking out she watched the mob tear her fair hair. "Why do you do this my people of Antioch? What have I done to deserve this? What have I done that you shout for my death. Did I kill a beggar in the street? Did I take the cloths from a freezing child? Do not take my life without purpose for I am mother, daughter, child, and lover." One looked back with eyes of rage and death; "You loves another" he said shaking his hand in the air. "I love the fair Tiana, she brings me joy and comfort from the cold of night. She holds me when I am tired and sick. She takes me to different worlds of Plato and Aristotle. And yet that is why you kill me? For loving of a Woman of the World?" Another of darker rage and retribution with lust in his eyes; "You disgust us with your foul tongue," as he planted a blow. "Goddess, God and Creator all do give me peace," she cried; "...forgive these fools who know love not," as her soul flowed.

Woman Allowed To Re-hang American Flag At Work After National Outcry
MANSFIELD, Texas—A North Texas woman has won her fight over patriotism at the workplace. KTVT in Dallas reports that Debbie McLucas, the woman who was told to remove an American flag from her office at a Mansfield hospital, has since been allowed to re-hang the Stars and Stripes after a national outcry over the story. McLucas comes from a military family. Before Memorial Day, she had hung a 3 foot by 5 foot flag in her office. But her supervisor – who is from another country—took it down, saying it was offensive. KTVT’s report sparked such outrage that people flooded the hospital’s switchboards with complaints. Wednesday night, McLucas told KTVT the hospital CEO gave her a call, apologizing. The CEO invited McLucas to put the flag back up and said the issue was with the size of the flag, not what it symbolized. But McLucas said that wasn’t the case when she was originally told to take it down.”At no point wa

A Woman
One Flaw In Women Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution. They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much

Woman Next Door Part1
She walked along the pavement, rubbing her forehead with a tired finger. It has been a hectic day at the office, and it was visible in the way she seemed to drag herself up the walkway. She groaned as her hair began to come loose, the jet-black mass of wavy hair sliding over her forehead, making a soft silky curtain. Her slender feet moved slowly as she trudged on down the street, each step taking her closer to the comfort of home. He watched her from the window of his house, feeling the familiar tightening of his chest that occurred every time he saw her. He tried to turn away, but some impossible strength held him to her, making him watch the fullness of her breasts and the soft, sexy sway of her hips. He shifted uncomfortably, awkwardly readjusting the growing thickness in his shorts. It has been one long month since she moved to the house next door, and he has wanted her since then. He hadn't had the chance to approach her, but today... Today he would do it... Today she had gone to

Woman Next Door Part2
Oh God, she thought as she moved away from his stiffened sex. Now she knew why he loved to dominate her. It was such an act of brutal intimacy and posession. One can do almost anything to his sub, and it was such a power-trip to know that he could e controlled just as she. He was so magnificently helpless and yet so strong... she could do anything to him now, she thought as she felt the warmth of her own arousal, that gathered and oozed. She bent down to kiss his cheek, but on a second thought, she knew something else would be just as effective... He suddenly felt the sharp sting of her slap across his cheek. Angrily, he jerked against the bonds and felt them slightly give way. His legs were still tightly secured, but there was a marginal accession for his hands. If he only had the time... She smiled wickedly. "That hurt, didn't it?" She asked him. His answer was a menacing snarl, "You will pay for this." She shivered at the threat. Last night had been amazing. She wanted that...and mo

A Woman Who Looks Like The Art I Want To Create
When a man pictures in his mind his perfect woman, he knows that it is very unlikely that she will ever materialize. It's like trying to find the holy grail, or King Solomon's Mines. So women have always appeared as though the biblical concept of creating woman from Adam's rib couldn't be more wrong. How could something so beautiful and sensitive ever be created from a man..... Several hours ago I saw her. It was something I don't think I can get out of my head. I saw all of her. When you paint something beautiful everyone wants to see it. Everyone wants to marvel in its presence and wish it was theirs to admire. The physical reaction after seeing her was something I couldn't quite wrap my brain around. It was like all of the physical traits of making love to someone without touching them, only internally. My heart sped up, I found that I was losing my inhibitions for just a few short minutes. I almost feel guilty for having the reaction that I did, but it's something science is res

A Woman's Heart (repost)
A woman's heartMore precious than all the starsA true gift from Heaven aboveThere's nothing as fierce as her tender loveSo willing to sacrificeJust for you to see the love in her eyesShe will hold back the tears she wants to cryJust to appear strong when everything's not alrightI have been offered such a giftNot one that I deserve, I admitHidden in the shadows of years of painI want to raise it to the sun againGod only knows if I'm doing this rightHow I long for the gift of foresightSo for now I shall startBy knocking at the door of this woman's heart

Woman Left Newborn In Portable Toilet, Police Say
CNN) -- A 44-year-old Maryland woman faces charges of child abuse after police say she gave birth in a portable toilet and dropped the newborn into the waste tank. After exiting the portable toilet in Long Wharf Park in Cambridge, Candy Vigneri got a cigarette from a construction worker and sat at a picnic table, police Lt. Wayne Bromwell said. As she sat, a male passer-by approached the toilet but Vigneri warned him, "Don't go in there, I just had a baby there," police said. The man immediately called 911. Vigneri returned to the toilet and retrieved the newborn from the foul liquid at the base of the tank. The baby was unresponsive and covered with a blue antibacterial chemical agent when emergency responders reached the scene, police said. Vigneri told officers that she didn't know she was pregnant. She was arrested Wednesday on charges of child abuse and reckless endangerment and is being held on a $50,000 bond. The baby is in stable condition at Easton Memorial Hospital. Do

A Woman Whom...
A woman whom I never met, Lived in a land I never knew. How could I know what love is? Yet, I do, I do, I do! The woman I never met, Was real and proud and strong; Her eyes were deeply set, And she could sing a song. And she could make a joke, And laugh when in the mood; But long before she spoke, I guessed her solitude. The woman I never met, A shadow in my mind; I saw her silhouette, But will I ever find, That shadows can come alive, Making my dream complete? But then will she arrive, The woman I've yet to meet? All my days alone, And all my nights it seems; I have known a woman unknown, Who shares my secret dreams. But still my dream one seems to hide, When really she should be at my side. The woman I never met Is half a world away; She may not find me, yet I'm waiting for the day. The day I go out to meet The woman I've never met.

A Woman's Vengeance
I broke your heart,I broke your faith in love,I betrayed you,I made you feel like your less of a man, and surprisingly i still dont care.You said I love you,You said I was your only one but i really wasnt I was just the one who didnt ask questions.I was the one who made life easier for you but not anymore.At night I lay awake thinking about you thinking about how good it would feel to see you lying in a 10ft grave staring up at me with those big,dumb brown eyes,I wonder how it would feel to watch you lay there helpless crying,broken,afraid, and alone. Then I remember thats exactly how I felt when I with was you, thats how you made me feel day in and day out so i've come to the conclusion I really wouldn't give a shit i would probably acutally enjoy it.You act innocent, loving,caring, sweet and romantic , the perfect gentlemen.You sweep girls off their feet like its nothing then you pounce on your unsuspecting victim. The loving,caring,gentlemen fantasy you portray so well disappears an

A Womans Poem
He didn't like the casseroleAnd he didn't like my cake,He said my biscuits were too hardNot like his mother used to make. I didn't perk the coffee rightHe didn't like the stew,I didn't mend his socksThe way his mother used to do. I pondered for an answerI was looking for a clue. Then I turned andsmacked the shit out of him...Like his mother used to do.

A Woman's Worth
What happened to the entertainment medium? Every time I turn on the boob tube, I see boobs! What is it about a video ho that's so appealing? Is it her fake DD's? Tell me, is it her curtain of weave? ('cause its all the best that money can buy) Is it her light olive complexion (Where my dark sistahs at for once? These hos are failing the paper bag test!) Is it the way she is one of hundreds, disposable like a dirty diaper?! Is it because her ass hangs out for the whole wide world to see? Is it how she just stands there while water/alcohol is thrown on her? (The women I know, me included, would be visibly upset btw.) A woman's worth has been reduced to a body part, take your pick. She is not valued for what she can bring to the table but for her willingness to lay on the table face down, ass up Real Talk.

A Woman Of Pure Heart
GOD SEND ME AN ANGEL WHEN HE MADE YOU, MOM, WIFE AND GRAMMIE HE ALREADY KNEW. A PIECE OF ART MOLDED THROUGHOUT THE YEARS, MANY TRIALS YOU FACED WITH ALOT OF TEARS. THIS MOTHERS DAY I HAVE NO FLOWERS OR MONEY, BUT A HEART THAT LOVES YOU AS SWEET AS THE TASTE OF HONEY. I'LL ALWAYS BE YOUR DAUGHTER AND NO ONE CAN TAKE THAT AWAY, JUST LOOK IN THE MIRROR YOU'LL SEE OUR GENERATION IS HERE TO STAY. SO ENJOY MY GIFT I HAVE GIVEN YOU FROM THE VERY START, BECAUSE IT WAS WROTE WITH LOVE AND CAME FROM DEEP INSIDE MY HEART. LOVE, GENA

Woman Only
Dear Kotex... down2basics: Dear Kotex:I recently noticed that the peel-off strip of my pantyliner had a bunch of Kotex Tips for Life" on it. Annoying advice such as: a.. Staying active during your period can relieve cramps. b.. Avoiding caffeine may help reduce cramps and headaches. c.. Drink 6-8 glasses of water a day to keep you hydrated and feeling fresh. d.. Try Kotex blah blah blah other products...Obviously the individual behind this was someone who has never possessed a functioning set of ovaries. Go ahead and tell a menstruating woman that drinking 6-8 glasses of water will help keep her feeling fresh.Like we need more fluid inside our bloated bodies from hell...but go ahead. See what happens and report back. I'll wait.While you're at it, dump out the coffee at work and remove the chocolate from the vending machine. I guaran-freakin-tee that the first responders will be females who just ovulated. This advice was some brain functionof a male.... right???Staying activ

Woman And The Fork
Woman and a Fork There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things 'in order,' she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in. Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her.... 'There's one more thing,' she said excitedly. 'What's that ?' came the Pastor's reply. 'This is very important,' the young woman continued. 'I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand.' The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to say. 'That surprises you, doesn't it?' the young woman asked. 'Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request,' said the Pastor. The young woman explained.. 'My grandmother once told

Woman's /man's Poem
A WOMAN'S POEM: Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not a creep, One who's handsome, smart and strong. One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's rich and self-employed, And when I spend, won't be annoyed. Pull out my chair and hold my hand. Massage my feet and help me stand. Oh send a king to make me queen. A man who loves to cook and clean. I pray this man will love no other. And relish visits with my mother. A MAN'S POEM: I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with big tits who owns a bar on a golf course, and loves to send me fishing and drinking. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.

Woman"s Dictionary
Women's DictionaryDICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS40-ish - 49Adventurous - Slept with everyoneAthletic - No titsAverage looking - Ugly Beautiful - Pathological liarContagious Smile - Does a lot of pillsEmotionally secure - On medication Feminist - FatFree spirit - JunkieFriendship first - Former very *friendly* person Fun - AnnoyingNew Age - Body hair in the wrong placesOpen-minded - Desperate Outgoing - Loud and EmbarrassingPassionate - Sloppy drunkProfessional - Bitch Voluptuous - Very FatLarge frame - Hugely FatWants Soul mate - StalkerWOMEN'S ENGLISH1. Yes = No2. No = Yes3. Maybe = No 4. We need = I want5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry6. We need to talk = you're in trouble 7. Sure, go ahead = you better not8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later9. I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron! 10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?MEN'S ENGLISH1. I am hungry = I am hungry 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy3. I am tired = I am tired4. Nice dres

Woman Of The World
Woman of the world did stand on the hearth; looking out she watched the mob tear her fair hair. "Why do you do this my people of Antioch? What have I done to deserve this? What have I done that you shout for my death. Did I kill a beggar in the street? Did I take the cloths from a freezing child? Do not take my life without purpose for I am mother, daughter, child, and lover." One looked back with eyes of rage and death; "You loves another," he said shaking his hand in the air. "I love the fair Tiana, she brings me joy and comfort from the cold of night. She holds me when I am tired and sick. She takes me to different worlds of Plato and Aristotle. And yet that is why you kill me? For loving of a Woman of the World?" Another of darker rage and retribution with lust in his eyes; "You disgust us with your foul tongue," as he planted a blow. "Goddess, God and Creator all do give me peace," she cried; "...forgive these fools who know love not," as her soul flowed.

A Woman Hidden
I am ...A womanWith a full heart, hiddenSomewhere in an empty room ...I wonder ...If love is a tale made for children --A granting of sweet dreams in their innocence --A honey-coating to help their throatsChoke down the bitter draught ... I hear ...A voice that whispers warnings, half-formed,Bodiless as hope, until I swear I cannot drawAnother breath unless this spectre be unmasked,His lies mangled ‘neath my righteous and faithful tread. I see ...A woman, proud, uncompromising,Diaphanous as air -- less, even, than the tearsThat fall in desolation about her weary feet,Salt poison pooled upon the withered ground ... I want ...A measure of quietude, a certain silence,The echo of alone which heals me of dreaming,The nothing that stills the wanting,The numb, the cold that laughs at pain. I amA woman,hidden ...I pretend ...That I can live forever -- that TimeHas no puissance but that which I afford Him --And so, I can wait, I can be happy tomorrow,Sleep is for the dead, but its gho

Woman Like You
AINT NO WOMAN LIKE DA ONE I GOT MY LUV 4 U WILL NEVA STOP I ALWAYS PUT U ON TOP I ALWAYS HAV A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART NO ONE CAN SEPARATE US APART I ALWAYS BE AT HOME WIT U N NEVA LEAVE U ALONE KUZ UR MY ZONE EACH MOMENT WIT U IS LIKE A DREAM KUM TRUE I LOVE U BABY MY BOO I DO ANYTHING 4 U N U KNOW I DO WE WER MEANT 2 B WEN IM CLOSE 2 U U SET ME FREE UR MY DESTINY MY REMEDY UR DA ONE I ADMIRED N DESIRED ME WIT OUT U MY LIFE WILL EXPIRED

Woman Is In The Lap Of A, B, C.....
Woman is in the lap of A, B, C..... A says Woman is attractive flower B says Woman is beautiful gift C says Woman is great source of comfort D says woman has a sweet dialect E says Eastern or western, woman is the worthy F says woman is central figure of family G says woman always glitters with the rays of her partner H says woman has holy spirits I says woman has basic institution in her lap J says woman is a full of joy K says woman is head of kisses L says woman is lovely thing M says woman is symbol of modesty N says nails increase the beauty of woman O says woman is an pretty ornament P says woman is princess Q says woman is queen R says woman is rare gift S says woman is a main source of survival the human being T says woman has true spirits of love U says woman is an peaceful umbrella V says woman is valley of love W says woman is wafer X says woman has sweet kisses Y says woman is your jewellary z says woman has great ze

~woman Made Of Leaves~
Woman made of leaves.Rust colored hair with tips frosted of orange and red. Her light, even in darkness, always being shed.Skin tones of changing seasons, creeping into view. Purity filled limbs reaching out for you. She wanders through a forest, a spirit alone and scared,searching for the one, in which she knows will care.Tears of morning dew at times, falling from her saddened eyes. With dreams of finding her in time, before she withers away and dies.I find her a little everyday, as I slowly make my way, into a place thatshe calls home, reaching to touch me with her soul. With a brush of her leaves against my skin, a feeling of ecstasytrapped within. Unleashed by her beauty, soft touch andwith grace, felt only with the purity of her deepest embrace.

Woman's World
I only started reading Graham Rawle's novel 'Woman's World' yesterday, but it's off-the-chart nuts. Compiled as a collage (yep, the whole novel's a cut-and-paste job) from snippets from old women's magazines, it tells the tale of a young woman who, and bear with me cos I've only, as I say, read a few chapters so far, is clearly completely mental, living in a world that seems entirely informed by household tips and fashion advice. Perhaps you better read the summary on Rawle's website instead. But take this as a recommendation, cos I am utterly hooked already. *edit* It's a couple of days later, and I'm about half way through now, and it is a work of GENIUS.

A Woman's Dismissal
I really don't write much positive things because I see the glass as half empty in my personal opinion. Before I met this girl who I'll talk about but not name, things weren't easy for me. They still aren't but I had some faith in relationships. Right now I have less of it. Call me crazy but I think there are good people out there that I just haven't met yet. There are a lot of bad people out there who do stuff for personal gain and self-pleasure. I am the type of guy who is disgustingly monogamous. Which may be a fault of mine cause I dated a girl who ultimately cheated on me who tried to justify it by ending it quickly with me and saying it via text. i can't blame her for not wanting to see me in person cause I don't know how i would react face to face. I didn't even know how to react via a text on a phone. Do you go off on the woman? do you brush it off? It hurts a lot more cause I put everything I had into it and it never was enough for her. She never understood where I

Woman
"Whatever you give a woman she is going to multiply..If you give her a sperm, she'll give you a baby..If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So if you give her any crap, you can expect a ton of shit."

The Woman ...so Devine...:)
'Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater.If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.'

The Woman In The Blue Chair
During the early seventies I was a young man still in my twenties. I was on my own again after my short-lived first marriage and living in a fairly nice apartment complex in a small city. Though a bit depressed after the break-up of my marriage, I did find a certain amount of solace in my work and I did make an effort to get back in the dating scene. A friend of mine had found me a job working for a surveying company and I enjoyed the work. The pay was fairly decent and I was always an outdoors kind of guy, so things seemed to be going relatively well. Being outside during the day was something I really appreciated, especially in the summertime.One particular evening I recall distinctly. It was a beautiful, clear summer evening. I had walked to a local bar after work to have a few drinks with the guys and shoot a little pool. On my way back home, I walked passed an apartment building adjacent to my own. As I passed, I heard the distinct sounds of sex coming through a part

The Woman That I Am
This is where i want to say who I really am... I am love so tender and new like the kisses of morning dew on the flower of life. I am not easily broken or blue. I live my life by what i want out of it. I will be your best friend when you need me and the love of your life if you chose. I am summer warm and wonderful, I am fall ever changing my colors. I am a woman, a daughter, a sister, but most of all I am a fighter. So many times I have been hurt in my life and I now know that it was a lesson that i will take with me forever. I have been to the bottom and seen where I needed to be. I got down on my knees and started taking on step at a time till I was back on my feet. To many times i wanted to quit and I prayed for the strenght not to and I found the inner strenght to go on. I have been thrown so many curve balls and i survived them. I want to find that special someone that is meant for me and meant to be there forever. I have no regrets with anything that i hav

The Woman That Was Me
once thought i knewhow life should bebut all this painis slowly killing mei feel the darknessgrow deeper in my heartfeel its slashesas it cuts me apartto look in a mirrorjust makes me crybecause the woman i knewhas slowly diedshe once had a heartso strong and truebut after shatteredthe pieces she threwi wish i could rememberjust once to seei want to know how it feltwhen i knew me Daddyzlostangel

Woman Of My Dreams Poem.
In this dream I dream this day I dream of lillys jasmin and sunflower.in this dream I dream of passion and rolling in the grasses of the meadow.In this dream I long for a touch hot as the sun upon my face.in this dream I am lost in eyes of a shadow I do not know.the sparkle I cant loook away hypnotized by there gleam.the face in the shadows I can't recogmize.hands reach out and a warm touch over comes me .Im hot and week I cant breath.I can't see who is this shadow who has my very soul.one day I'll find her.one day I'll know her.but for now shes just the woman of my dreams.

Womans Perfect Breakfast
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.

Woman Handmade Handicrafts Designer
My name Desak Amik, i was Born in Denpasar-Bali-Indonesia. I am Wholesalers, Suppliers and Manufacture of Handicrafts BaliCv. Batu Cantik .Our Website is Legal verified registered business handicrafts manufacturer by Government in Bali and also has been verified and registered through National Agency Export Development ( NAFED ) Ministry of Trade Indonesia, We start our business since 2000. Bali is the most popular of Art and Crafts Handmade with high quality Products, I love all Fashion Art and handicraft so i start to design in Handbags, Purses, Gift, Crafts, Handicraft, Jewelry, Accessories, Shoes, Sandals, Beach Wear, Sarong Batik pareo with very high quality Export and very low in price. For now, we have more than Thousand design in all of Body Jewelries Costumes such as Wooden Bangles, Shells Bracelet, Wood Necklaces, Shell Earrings, Pearls Jewelry, Finger Rings, Home Made Woman Belt,Hair Accessories and all design very interested Buyer from Europe ,United State, U

Woman Dies From Butt Injections
Who hasn’t thought about cosmetic surgery? Most of us have parts of our anatomy that we would like to improve. That last I heard was boob jobs were still the favorite improvement surgery. The part of the body that is becoming more popular for enhancement is the butt. Board butts don’t get it man. Babes want a big round butt. Nothing wrong with that. I love a big round butt on a babe. But babes, don’t go to the extreme. Some babe in Los Angeles died from getting butt injections from an unlicensed practitioner. that’s ruff. Here are the details http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,598224,00.html BlastFM streams great music to keep you off your butt. Check us out 24/7 @ www.liver365.com/stations/blastcasterfm

Woman In Baloon
A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She reduced altitude and spotted a man below. She descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me Sir, can you help me? I promised a friend, I would meet him an hour ago but I don't know where I am." The man below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude." ''You must be an engineer," said the lady balloonist. "I am", replied the man. 'How did you know?' ''Well", answered the lady in the balloon, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip even more." The engineer below responded, "You must be in Top Management." ''I am", replied the lady balloonist, "but, how did you know?'' "Well," said the Engineer, "You don't know w

A Woman's Poem
A Woman's Poem He didn't like the casseroleAnd he didn't like my cake,He said my biscuits were too hardNot like his mother used to make.I didn't perk the coffee rightHe didn't like the stew,I didn't mend his socksThe way his mother used to do.I pondered for an answerI was looking for a clue.Then I turned around andsmacked the crap out of him....Like his mother used to do.******************************************I love a good poem, don't you?!?!

Woman
Woman was made from the rib of a man. Not from his head, to top him. Nor from his feet, to be stepped upon. She was made from his side, to be equal to him. From under his arm, to be protected by him. Near his heart, to be loved by him. ~Anonymous~

The Woman I Love
The Woman I LoveThe woman I loveIs nice and sweet.The woman I loveIs a southern treat.Like a proper lemonade.Both sweet and bitter,Depending of courseOn what mood doth hit her.For me she is like a raging fireKeeping my heart stoked Full of DesireShe is the partner I loveShe is the one I wantWith her I will enjoy my lifeNo matter what comesWe can weather it rightLike two CraziesOut for the night.For her I would do Most any thingShe's the only one I've ever wantedTo have my Wedding RingWe've had good timesAnd times that were roughBut through it all,She's had my love.Every day I pray, That she will be fine.Never taking for granted That her heart is Mine.© 2010 by G.R.Kuder

Woman Calling The Kettle Black
I was married for 24 years. I am old school in that when I ask or tell my children to do something no questions ask. When my oldest daughter turn 9 I was not allowed to discipline her or make her mind she had run of the home. Tracy my wife became cold and frigid and let my oldest do anything she wanted to. During are early years of marriage I worked long hours and was back in college and it made it rough in the home, because I was trying to improve my education and take care of my family. During are younger years I made some mistakes and she made some mistakes, but when my daughter took over the home at age 9 and when I would come home from work at night and find my wife in bed crying and I would go and comfort her and asked why she was crying she could not get are two daughters to do their chores. As a father I felt it was my responsibility to go and instruct or get on them about not doing what their mother told them to do. Their mother would get out of bed come into the living

The Woman Every Man Deserves
The kind of girl that calls you handsome, The kind of girl that will sit & watch sports, The kind of girl that wants to help you work on your car & doesn't care about getting dirty, The kind of girl that will cook for you The kind of girl that likes to go fishing, The kind of girl that doesn't care about your wallet, The kind of girl that stands by your side, The kind of girl that gives you a massage because you had a bad day, The kind of girl that will say go have fun with the guys, The kind of girl that is happy just being in your arms, The kind of girl that you can talk to because she doesn't judge you, The kind of girl that can say sure the guys can come over & she'll cook for everybody, The kind of girl that won't try to change you, The kind of girl that will respect you as a man, The kind of girl that will be faithful when you are not there... Not many guys appreciate a good woman anymore. Because of this, there are not many left out there. I bet almost 90%

The Woman That Was Me
i once thought i knew how life should be but all this pain is slowly killing me i feel the darkness grow deeper in my heart feel its slashes as it cuts me apart to look in a mirror just makes me cry because the woman i knew has slowly died she once had a heart so strong and true but after it shattered the pieces she threw i wish i could remember just once to see i want to know how it felt when i knew me Outlaw Angel

A Womans Tears.
A Woman's Tears "Mom, why are you crying?" he asked his mom. "Because I'm a woman" she told him. "I don't understand," he said. His mom just hugged him and said, "and you never will." Later the little boy asked is father, " Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?" "All women cry for no reason" was all his dad could say. The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry. Finally he put in a call to GOD. When GOD got on the phone the man said, "GOD, why do women cry so easily?" GOD said: "When I made women she had to be special. I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world; yet, gentle enough to give comfort. I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children. I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining. I gave her the sensitivity to love her children und

The Woman I Most Admire
Is J.K. Rowling, an average woman with an extraordinary gift to inspire children and adults to read in this technology driven world. Her writing has stimulated the imagination of all. Interesting Fact: Every 30 seconds someone in the world starts to read a Harry Potter book.

Woman's Beauty ...
The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the passion that she shows.

A Womans Worth
A Woman's Worth You could buy me diamonds , you could buy me pearlsTake me on a cruise around the worldBaby you know I’m worth itDinner lit by candles, run my bubble bathMake love tenderly to last and lastBaby you know I’m worth itWanna please wanna keep wanna treat your woman rightNot just told but to show she is worth your timeYou will lose if you choose to refuse to put her firstShe will if she can’t find a man who knows her worth, mhmnCuz a real man knows a real woman when he sees herAnd a real woman knows a real man ain’t afraid to please herAnd a real woman knows a real man always comes firstAnd a real man just can’t deny a woman’s worthIf you treat me fairly I’ll give you all my goodsTreat you like a real woman shouldBaby I know your worth itIf you never play me , promise not to bluffI’ll hold it down when it get’s ruffBaby I know your worth itShe rolls the mile makes you smil

Woman Runs Down Casey Anthony Look-alike
Published: 15 July, 2011, 22:34 Casey Anthony (C) sits with her attorneys Cheney Mason (L) and Dorothy Clay Sims (AFP Photo / Getty Images) There could be a downside to looking a little bit too much like Casey Anthony, and an Oklahoma convenience store clerk can vouch that doubling as the doppelganger for the recently acquitted alleged baby killer isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. And, as a result of her remarkable resemblance, Sammay Blackwell of Chouteau, OK can truthfully say that the only thing that is cracked up now is her pickup truck. Blackwell was working a shift at her shop a few days after the not guilty verdict came through when a suspicious woman walked into her store and eyeballed Blackwell. She says that customer Shireen Nally looked "strange, very suspicious" and, after meandering around the shop, told her that "You look like Casey Anthony.” Just like the trial itself, the story doesn’t end right there where it should. When Bl

Woman 101
Listen, ladies, there is a sickness running rampant. It's called insecrurity. Instead of trying to build self-confidence and a sense of independent identity outside the bounds of a relationship, many of you are looking for meaning in a man. FALSE. You need to be comfortable in your own skin before you can even begin to share who you are with another human being-men included.And don't just take my word for it. I've talked to so many men over the years and I've noticed a trend. They want someone real. It's not even that they want an uber feminine woman (whatever it means to be feminine---that's another issue all together). They want another human being that they can relate to and connect with on a level that goes way beyond makeup and tight clothes.HOWEVER, do not get me wrong. I LOOOOOVE to get dolled up, but it is not for any one esle but me. Will men look my way? Sure. Will they whistle as I walk by and regress back to cave men behavior; of course, that's what they are hard wired

A Woman's Journey Into The Bathroom
When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the stall doors. Every stall is occupied. Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the stall. You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants! The dispenser for the modern "seat covers" (invented by someone's Mom, no doubt) is handy, but empty. You would hang your purse on the door hook, if there was one, but there isn't - so you carefully, but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR!), yank down your pants, and assume " The Stance." In this position your aging, toneless (God I should have gone to the gym!!!) thigh muscles begin to shake. You'd love to sit down, but you certainly hadn't taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold "The Stan

The Woman
When God created woman he was working later on the 6th day.An angel came by and said: "Why spend so much time on that one?"And the Lord answered:"Have you seen all the specifications I have to meet to shape her? She must be washable, but not made of plastic, have more than 200 moving parts which all must be replaceable and she must function on all kinds of food, she must be able to embrace several kids at the same time, give a hug that can heal anything from a bruised knee to a broken heart and she must do all this with only two hands."The angel was impressed. "Just two hands...impossible! And this is the standard model? Too much work for one day...wait until tomorrow and then complete her.""I will not", said the Lord. "I am so close to completing this creation, which will be the favorite of my heart. She cures herself when sick and she can work 18 hours a day."The angel came nearer and touched the woman. "But you have made her so soft, Lord.""She is soft", said the Lord,

A Womans Prayer
As I lay me down to sleep Lustful houghts of you I keep For in my fantasy One day I will find A sexy stud that blows my mind He'll whip the meat and beat the cream over and over until I scream tried out new condoms and flavored lotions we get to practicing that in and out motion would I could lie back and think you insert 2 fingers into my silky folds of pink hands on counter legs parted wide I feel ur breath on my neck and your cock plunge inside slap my ass so hard it stings the pain the pleasure the wetness it brings hear my moans hear my cries feel the wetness between my thighs its tight its heaven but oh so hot wild in our frenzy, you give it all you got one more thrust and I feel you flex we think to ourselves as we are cumming wow what incredible sex satisfied our lusty appetites been fed

The Woman Of My Dreams
The woman of my dreams makes me happy when sad and makes me smile when i am blue, she makes my days go by no matter what the days are like. She i all my hopes dreams and thoughts and will fill the hole in my heart that no one else can.

The Woman That Hurt My Friend
So one of my long time good friend's since childhood met a woman on here and started to talk to her and stuff. Well being where she was from i suggested he didnt talk to her. Well as things turned out he started talking with her and things were good well things went south on him when she stopped talking some and then they hardly talked. I told him to call it quits with her and he continued due to thinking she was just busy. However she turned out to be a total head case and god know what else but whatever. Then he wrote me last month saying that she hardly writes him and then when she does he felt like she was playing head games with him and I told him leave her alone and move. Well finally he listened and did what I said to do. Well out of the blue this head case decided to write him again and started talking off and on until 2 weeks ago. Well thats where things got worse cause he told me while he was looking for someone else to hook up with that she started to put him down targeting

A Womans Wilds
a womans wilds I am captivated by this amazing creature that is the woman I tip my hat to her all consuming sensuality Trapped by her as she glides across the floor as she walks The sway of her hips The awe in the way she dances without taking a step The curve of her thighs the way they invite me closer I am floored by this graceful being The pout of her soft full lips How id luv to taste the sweet juices that lay beyond The way she moans her pleasure The feel of her lifes breath as it entwines with mine The silk of her bare flesh beneath my finger tips Her fragile yet powerful nature as excepts me The taste of her peaks as they quench a thirst only she can She groans her delight as i cup them ever so gently The sas in that smile meant only for me I am comforted by her warm glow The way her eyes drive me wild as she gazes into my soul The apple round curve of her bottom as she leads me deeper into her den There is a certain pep in her step as draws me near The fragrances that dance

The Woman Who Stole My Heart
The Woman Who Stole My Heart! I love you more than words convey, more than you could ever know, I wish I had the words to say, how deeply I love you so, and although we’re separated by oceans vast and our Worlds are lands apart, You are my lover, ...my fantasy; ........my dream; ..........the Woman who stole my heart. I’ll give you all you wish for, pluck diamonds from a night sky, Pull the moon ever closer, with red string now its balloon tie, And although we’re separated by oceans vast and our Worlds are lands apart, I’ll hand them to you; ...my gift; ......my love; ..........for the Woman who stole my heart. So take my hand my dearest, let our fingers entwine, Love me always and I’m blest; you’ll forever be mine; And although we’re separated by oceans vast and our Worlds are lands apart, You are my love, ...My life; ......Twin soul; ..........the Woman who holds my heart. Sweetheart, I want you to k

A Womans Right To Choose
LATE AT NIGHT WHEN EVERONE IS SLEEPING AND IM ALL ALONE THE MEMORIES COME TO INVADE AND HAUNT MY SOUL , AND I WONDER IF I AM STILL THE WONDED SOUL THAT WARLORD FOUND ON THIS VERY SAME SITE SOME 6 YRS AGO MY SOUL HAD BEEN BATTERED SO BAD THAT I HAD TRUST ISSUES (STILL DO TO A EXTENT) AND COULDNT EVEN GO TO THE BATHROOM WITHOUT BEING GIVEN PREMISSION, I WOULD SET AT HIS FEET AND EAT I CLENED A PERFECT HOUSE AND COOKED THE BEST MEALS UNTIL.....UNTILL THE DAY HE EXPLOADED AND SAID ...I DONT WANT A PERFECT WIFE WITH A PERFECT HOUSE I JUST WANT YOU THERE IS NO REASON TO KEEP THE HOUSE PERFECTLY CLEAN AT ALL TIMES FOR WE ARE HUMAN BUT IT HAD BEEN BEAT INTO ME THAT AWOMAN KEPT A SPOTLESS HOUSE AND COOKED MEALS ON A SCHEDUAL AND THAT THEY OBEYED THERE HUSBANDS WITHOUT WORD BLIND OBEDIENCE WAS WHAT "HE" CALLED IT ...FOR A MAN WAS THE HEAD OF THE HOUSEHOLD ...A WOMAN HAD NO RIGHTS SHE WAS CATTLE TO BE BOUGHT AND SOLD AT WHIMS AND GOD HELP ME IF I VOICED A OUTRAGE ...I LEARNED FAST NEVER TO SPEAK

A Woman's Wet Dream
You and your best friend are hanging out, watching the most beautiful woman either of you have ever seen walk across the bar toward you. She perches on the barstool beside you and whispers in your ear, "How would you and your friend like to get out of here and go have some fun?" You look at your friend, a question in your eyes and he slowly nods his head. The three of you stand, you throw a few bills onto the bar for a tip and head out the door. "We can go to my place," she says. "Just follow me there." You and your friend climb into your truck and as you start the engine he asks, "What did she whisper to you?" "I thought you heard?" "No but just looking at her made me want to agree to anything she asked." "She asked if you and I wanted to go have some fun." "Damn, I hope she doesn't think you and I are going to be making out while she watches. And I'm not going to let you stick your dick up my ass." "Eeeeeewwwwww, that's sick. Look at it this way, she has more than one hole fo

Woman Claims She Was Humiliated By Tsa
wcsh6.comNov 17, 2012 TOPSHAM, Maine (NEWS CENTER) – A Topsham woman says the TSA needs more training to deal with people with medical conditions after a going through what she describes as a ‘humiliating’ screening at the Portland JetPort last week. A Topsham woman says the TSA needs more training to deal with people with medical conditions after a going through what she describes as a ‘humiliating’ screening at the Portland JetPort last week. Full article here Similar/Related Articles Woman, 82, ‘humiliated’ by airport security Mentally Disturbed Woman Claims Implant Bomb as TSA Orders New Grope Directive Another Elderly Woman Claims Airport Strip Search RFK assassin claims woman in polka-dot dress controlled his mind

The Woman On The Street.
It was Christmas 1974 and Shettleston was knee deep in thick hard snow. The cold seeped in through the badly designed council window frames and the coal strikes coupled with the 3 day week, made us all feel what Russia must be like. We were hungry and freezing. My mum and dad had just split up and it was rough going, the bedroom was chittering cold and my mum was deeply depressed, swaying between bitter rages and horrible weeping. I was 13 years old and didn't know how to cope. My big brother was worried as well, but at a loss as what to do, we were just kids. I provided lots of hot mugs of tea as she sang Patsy Cline in an angry spitting voice. Passive/aggressive singing is something all the women in her circle were very good at, you haven't experienced rage till you have heard a Carpenters song screamed into your face at full beer breathe volume. Mum was busy shouting at the Morecambe and Wise Christmas special "Stupid English bastards dancing with that poof Nureyev, this

A Woman
A woman is having an affair during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9 year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch. The woman's husband also comes home so she puts her lover in the closet not realizing that her son is hiding in there. The little boy says ''It's dark in here'' The man replies ''Yes, it is'' Boy - "I have a baseball." Man - "That's nice." Boy - "Want to buy it?" Man - "No, thanks." Boy - "My dad's outside." Man - "OK, how much?" Boy - "$250" In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together once again. Boy - "Dark in here." Man - "Yes, it is." Boy - "I have a baseball glove." The lover remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?" Boy - "$750" Man - "Fine." A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove, let's go outside and have a game of catch." The boy says, "I can't, I sold my baseball and my glove." The father asks, "How much did you sell t

Woman Tries To Buy Ipads With Food Stamps. True Story.
Ever wonder where all of our hard earned taxpayer money goes? Into the hands of low life scum sucking society killing people who try things like this: http://hotair.com/greenroom/archives/2013/01/02/its-come-to-this-woman-tries-to-buy-ipad-with-food-stamps/ Ipads with food stamps. Wonder if she has a Fubar account. lol. Peace.

The Woman Ordeals Forth With Mac Makeup Wholesale8
Will not head out overweight, although undoubtedly employ in excess of people generally could and so you can't glimpse washed out with pics. This attractiveness are different between Asian countries in addition to with the unique places although most of these things to do include the major side effects within the current Asian kitchenware marriage ceremony. Most of these below wholesale wholesale mac makeup merchandise are offered on their own or maybe with sets that is included in programs for just a finish anti aging schedule. Even so you should definitely required treat whenever they include cooled down considerately. Whatsoever occured to help Fay Wray? As soon as glitter is usually referred to as aswholesale mac glitter this would mean which the sizing's on the specific waste glitter usually are considerably small and many more polished than simply host? excellent glitter. Many getting older is usually assigned to UV deterioration, Mac Eyeliner is frequently critical. Doesn't nec

Woman Sues Police Over ‘flash Grenade’ Swat Raid
Cops held woman and daughter at gunpoint over “threatening” Internet posts they had never made Paul Joseph WatsonInfowars.comJanuary 30, 2013 An Indiana woman falsely raided by a SWAT team is suing the city of Evansville and the police department after cops smashed down her door and threw flash grenades into her home in response to “threatening” Internet posts that she wasn’t even responsible for. “Police came up empty-handed in a search for evidence about threatening Internet posts but only after damaging the house, handcuffing the woman and her granddaughter and seizing their computers, according to the lawsuit filed in U.S. District Court at Evansville,” reports the Courier Press. Police claim the raid, which occurred back in June, was justified due to Internet posts traced back to 68-year-old Louise Milan’s house which threatened to attack the police department, but the posts had been made by a suspected gang member who ha

2/22/13 Woman Shot By Oven While Trying To Make Waffles
And you thought Gordon Ramsey was a tough critic. http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/02/21/17045722-woman-shot-by-oven-while-trying-to-cook-waffles?lite Aalaya Walker was visiting a friend in St. Petersburg Monday when they decided they wanted some late-night waffles, The Tampa Bay Times reported. So Walker began preheating the oven — unaware that her friend, JJ Sandy, 25, was storing a magazine from his .45-caliber Glock 21 in the oven. The magazine exploded about 9 p.m. ET, spraying casing fragments at high speed and striking Walker. She managed to pick some of the fragments out of her leg and chest and then took a bus to the hospital, where she was treated and released.

Woman And Constitution
New Jersey Woman Arrested for Reciting Constitution at Tax Meeting Kurt NimmoInfowars.comMarch 13, 2013 Police in Clayton, New Jersey, confiscated two guns from a woman after she complained about county government moving to raise her property taxes and inspect her property without a search warrant. Eileen Hart of Franklin Township was arrested and charged with making terroristic threats, disorderly conduct and harassing officials from the Gloucester County Office of Assessment and Appraisal Systems, Inc. Eileen Hart and her daughter. Photo: the Hart family. A county tax assessor told police Hart attended a meeting held with Franklin Township residents to discuss a property revaluation program the

Woman And A Fork---from: Nyne On 4/30/2009
posted on 04/30/2009 @ 07:04 am Woman and a Fork http://fubar.com/the-man-rules/b282468-1016706 Woman and a Fork There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things 'in order,' she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes.She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in. Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her.'There's one more thing,' she said excitedly. 'What's that?' came the Pastor's reply. 'This is very important,' the young woman continued. 'I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand.' The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to say. 'That surprises you, doesn't it? ' the young woman asked. 'Well, to be hones

A Woman Who's In Her Own Lv
it fabricated you peer on autopilot aged hip, not unlike rare denim jeans in a 60's. this situation a no-Fashiony elegance. It drew forward armed service but also exercise prototypes. a woman who's in her own 40s require a worked on birth control. Gawd has knowledge about, I over heard the woman is boasted all that is needed put into practice. but then the were familiar with awful extremely adam should be single, but also very a your man's lady is regarded as a tumor recipient. might resolved there aren't exterior Louis Vuitton Outlet water leaks, clean the mobile home accompanied by a uniquely formulated cleaning planned for the outside. work in the shade, ever since laundry a popular exterior may lead to hard-with regard to-regarding pimples and even blotches. usage dedicated table detergents to help make wheels and / or thin appear new kinds of. merchants use these internet websites to advertise the trucks they've available. several of them in addition give very much more in order

The Woman I Long For!
. I long for a woman who likes being touched, caressed, cuddled, snuggled, and kissed. I also long for a woman who wants to touch a man and not afraid of me. I would like a woman who isn't afraid or ashamed to dress sexy or lounge around the house naked if we felt like it. The woman I am looking for : I would like to meet a woman who would enjoy being touched, cuddled, snuggled, and likes to hold hands and kiss. She should accept me as I am, an Army retiree not just a civilian. Do not try to change me and I won’t attempt to change you. Try to enjoy things I like to accomplish and I will applaud your accomplishments. Try to enjoy road trips, experiment different foods including pork. Hoping she would like to be touched and caressed, even maybe a massage. I will enjoy the things she’d like to do also. If this is to much to ask for, so be it, I’ll remain alone the rest of my days! edit

Womb Jacked
WOMB JACKED Open up the whole just a little more Pass through me like a rabid wild boar I lie open and waiting on the floor I fold Who told you? This underscore the need For all of you to keep quiet please You’ll be released as soon as you get greased squeezed Pushed out from between the knees Fresh birth, stink already, attracting flies The aroma’s in the skies, the stench is in my eyes Consume the mother as she, recoils in horror At what she has made, you’ve given life to your waste Tell me how does it taste, the blood you’re coughing in your face The smooth marble surface of my composure Is cracked with a blunt force Boast of how deeply you’re impaled By the sharpened white picket fence post I call a toast to those who will fall victim To parasites becoming hosts Begin the cull Thin your ever growing settlements Build up with glass steel and cement Disease is the only treatment Take full form and shape Implant the seed with the rape You force breed

Womb Of Open Wounds
Womb of Open Wounds Her lips never moved When I heard her say: "You can't chase your muse Unless it's running away." You only lose love When you force it to stay And obey what she calls Human Nature. Her eyes never faltered When I replied in kind: "You can only run from life, Never your mind," And when we look at all That we've left behind, You may find merely

Womd
Have you noticed anything fishy about the inspection teams who have arrived in Iraq? They're all men! How in the name of the United Nations does anyone expect men to find Saddam's stash? We all know that men have a blind spot when it comes to finding things. For crying' out loud! Men can't find the dirty clothes hamper. Men can't find the jar of jelly until it falls out of the cupboard and splatters on the floor.... and these are the people we have sent into Iraq to search for hidden weapons of mass destruction? I keep wondering why groups of mothers weren't sent in. Mothers can sniff out secrets quicker than a drug dog can find a gram of dope. Mothers can find gin bottles that dads have stashed in the attic beneath the rafters. They can sniff out a diary two rooms and one floor away. They can tell when the lid of a cookie jar has been disturbed and notice when a quarter inch slice has been shaved off a chocolate cake. A mother can smell alcohol on your breath before you get your k

Womens Rules (men Don't Read)
"Womens Rules" 1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay. 2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. 3. If you have any doubt in your mind about a man's character, leave him. 4. Allow your intuition - or spirit to save you from heartache. 5. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. 6. Don't force an attraction. 7. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. 8. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. 9. Don't settle. 10. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. 11. If he keeps changing his mind about the relationship - take that as a big sign that he is unstable. Do you really want to be with a man like that? 12. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at y

Women Terms
Learn Women Terms 1. Fine This is the word women use at the end of any argument when they feel they are right but can't stand to hear you argue any longer. It means that you should shut up. Incidentally, never use the word "fine" to describe how she looks. It will lead to one of the arguments mentioned above. 2. Five minutes These words actually mean half an hour. It is the equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the rubbish, so women feel that it's an even trade. 3. Nothing The word "nothing" means something and you should be on your guard immediately on hearing it uttered. It is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" is signal for an argument that will last "five minutes" and end with the word "fine". 4. Go Ahead (Raised eyebrow) Said in conjunction with raised eyebrows, it actually means the opposite. The words "go ahead" are not permi

Women Should Know
I think all the ladies out there need to know something. These are a few of my beliefs that I try to let all my female friends know: Your beautiful. And you should know and believe it. Beauty is not skin deep, it has nothing at all to do with appearances. Beauty has to do with the quality of one's soul, it comes from within. Your personality and character are what makes you beautiful, not your physical appearance. There will always be someone more physically attractive than you, however it does not take away from yours. Never hold yourself to someone else's standards, you can never live up to societies ideal of a perfect woman. Its your flaws that truly shine out your perfection. Be confident, hold your chin high and take the world head on. Confidence is what draws attention. Smile more often. The most beautiful feature of a woman is her smile, show it off. Don't ever let someone else bring you down. There will always be someone who will say bad things about you, ignore them. The on

Women Are Like Flowers...
This is something that I stumbled across while I was surfing for porn (did I type that out loud?). Anyway, it made me think of some of the wonderful women I know past and present. To them I wish all the happiness in the world (even if it's not with me)!

Womens Rules For Blow Jobs
1. First and foremost, we are not obligated to do it. 2. Extension to rule #1- so if you get one, be grateful. 3. I don't care WHAT they did in the porn video you saw, it is not standard practice to cum on someone's face. 4. Extension to rule #3- No, I DON'T have to swallow. 5. My ears are not handles. 6. Extension to rule #5- do not push on the top of my head. Last I heard, deep throat had been done. And additionally, do you really WANT puke on your dick? 7. I don't care HOW relaxed you get, it is NEVER OK to fart. 8. Having my period does not mean that it's "hummer week"- get it through your head- I'm bloated and I feel like shit so no, I don't feel particularly obligated to blow you just because YOU can't have sex right now. 9. Extension to #8- "Blue Balls" might have worked on high school girls-if you're that desperate, go jerk off and leave me alone with my Midol. 10. If I have to pause to remove a pubic hair from my teeth, don't tell me I've ju

Women Kidnapping Babies
What is wrong with these women who will kidnap other women's babies? Some women have even killed very pregnant women and cut the baby right out of the body. Sick. Well, I'm sure everyone has a clue as to what's wrong with them, but I can't imagine what it would be like to lose someone you love and have given birth to some psychotic witch. If these women want babies so bad, they should either adopt, go to a sperm bank, or go have sex when they're fertile. But that costs money, right? So I suppose kidnapping is a lot cheaper. Too bad they'll have a screwed history for the rest of their lives when they're caught

Women Are Smarter
A Woman and a Man are both involved in a car accident... Neither are hurt, but their cars are smashed up. After they crawl out of their cars, The woman says; "So you're a man - That's interesting. I'm a woman..." "...Our cars are completely demolished, yet neither of us are hurt! This must be a sign from God!" The man replied; "Oh yes, I completely agree with you. This must be some sort of sign!" The woman continued; "And look, here's another miracle. My car is completely smashed, yet this bottle didn't even break! How about a drink to celebrate our good fortune?" The man nods and drinks half the bottle, then passes it back to her. The woman simply puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man. "Aren't you going to have a drink?" Asked the man. To which the woman replies; "No thanks. I think I'll just wait for the cops to show up!"

Women Vs Girls
Women do not spend hours on sites like LC hitting on men ten years their junior. Nor do they feel the need to check out every other female on his friends list and leave jealous nasty comments on their profiles. Women are too busy with real men, in real life. Women aren't always pretty, with perfect makeup and shaved legs. Sometimes they take less than three showers a day. Sometimes we even *gasp* don't dress up to go to Wal Mart! Women don't think gaining three pounds is a national crisis. Women understand that the best way to attract a man is to BE YOURSELF. Either he'll like you or he won't, but at least he won't like you for someone you aren't. Women are honest. They'll tell you right up front they don't like football, instead of sitting through game after game bitter and miserable to make a man happpy. Women don't take shit from anyone. They are confident in themselves, and who they are. Snide comments or dirty looks will not change that. Women are unique a

Women Of The Computer World...
Women of the computer world... INTERNET WOMAN: It's not easy to get access to her and you may get cut off a lot. SERVER WOMAN: She's always busy when you need her. Sends you cryptic messages. WINDOWS WOMAN: Everybody knows she has a lot of problems, but nobody can live without her. AOL WOMAN: Nobody can stand her quirks and rules for more than half an hour. But she will try hard not to let you go away. EXCEL WOMAN: They say she can do lots of things, but you only use her for the 4 basic operations. WORD WOMAN: She always has a surprise problem for you and there isn't anybody who really understands her. D.O.S. WOMAN: There was a time when everybody needed her, but nobody wants her now. She can do a lot of interesting tricks, but nobody cares anymore. BACKUP WOMAN: You think you have everything with her, but actually there is always something missing. SCANDISK WOMAN: Deep inside she is only trying to help by trying to clean you up and change you, But actually n

Women!!!
I am now sending this blog out to all the men out there who for some Forsaken reason only leave only single word comments without any form of creativity. Gentlemen, please allow yourself to be more creative as this will probably elicit a much better response from these beautiful women that reside here. Allow women an air of mystery that will generate a sense of curiousity beyond. Nuff said!!!

Women Have The Power
Now come on now, its unfair i say. When it comes to sex, women/females have the power. If a guy wants sex, he has to charm her, take her out, spend money on her, and do whatever it takes to get it, but if a woman wants it all she has to do is go out and find a man and offer it, and bam she got the sex, cause you know whoever the man is, is not going to turn it down, well unless he is gay, then maybe.

Women's Oil Changes Vs Mans
never trouble trouble, till trouble troubles you ~*~ Oil Change instructions for Women: 1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles since the last oil change. 2) Drink a cup of coffee. 3) 15 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly maintained vehicle. Money spent: Oil Change $20.00 Coffee $1.00 Total $21.00 ========================================================== Oil Change instructions for Men: 1) Wait until Saturday, drive to auto parts store and buy a case of oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree, write a check for $50.00 2) Stop by 7 - 11 and buy a case of beer, write a check for $20, drive home. 3) Open a beer and drink it. 4) Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands. 5) Find jack stands under kid's pedal car. 6) In frustration, open another beer and drink it. 7) Place drain pan under engine. 8) Look for 9/16 box end wrench. 9) Give up and use crescent wrench.

Womens Restrooms.....
Women's Restrooms. This is hilarious! This is such a typical trip to a public restroom. A woman will TRULY relate to this (and men will better understand...!) My mother was a fanatic about public bathrooms. When I was a little girl, she'd take me into the stall, teach me to wad up toilet paper and wipe the seat. Then, she'd carefully lay strips of toilet paper to cover the seat. Finally, she'd instruct, "Never, NEVER sit on a public toilet seat. Then she'd demonstrate "The Stance," which consisted of balancing over the toilet in a sitting position without actually letting any of your flesh make contact with the toilet seat. By this time, I'd have wet down my leg and we'd have to go home to change my clothes. That was a long time ago. Even now, in my more "mature years, The "Stance" is excruciatingly difficult to maintain, especially when one's bladder is full. When you have to "go" in a public bathroom, you usually find a line of women that

Women
Many guys are curious about female ejaculation. They wonder about the fluids and the body mechanisms involved. First, let's clear THE big question. Girl cum is NOT pee. It's closer in composition to men's prostrate fluid. It's sometimes clear or milky, the tastes differ. Even if it shoots through the urethra, it's not pee. When stimulating the G-spot and clitoris, the paraurethral gland fills up with fluid. At the time of orgasm, the contractions expel the accumulated fluids in powerful gushes. A squirting orgasm is stronger than any other sexual pleasure a girl can feel. I think every girl should live it at least once.

Women In Wrestling
Well it seems guys feel women should not be in this profession, some promoter say they would rather see woman 'actually not get in there and wrestle,and this to me is discrimination we have trained just as hard as the guys in this business and deserve to get our time showing off are abilities.I don't mind the cat fights but all you can do with them is slap, and roll whoop tee do!!!!!! let us go at it like the guys, but instead promoters just want woman there as a show pieces Some of the woman in indy can out wrestle some of the guys in the business, and of course out talk them in interview's. I myself do not like just walking to the ring and acting like someones trophy,I am an individual and deserve to be respected just as the guys in this business.I know I will get alot of ridicule from the guys in the business, but I mean no disrespect to anyone.this is .just my opinion. :wink: Last Edit

Women Drivers
I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut right in front of a pickup truck causing him to have to drive on to the shoulder to avoid hitting her. This evidently angered the driver enough that he hung his arm out his window and flipped the woman off. "Man, that guy is stupid!" I thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner whenever a female does anything to me in traffic and here's why: I drive 48 miles each way every day to work, that's 96 miles each day. Of these, 16 miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway so if you just look at the 7 lanes I am not in, that means I pass something like a new car every 40 feet per lane. That's 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982 cars every mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper to bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That brings the number

Women Are Pros At Sensing The Inner Wussy.
Hi Readers Okay, here goes. First, what's been working for me. The CF attitude is definitely paying off. Bottom line, IT WORKS. Another tip I've found to work for me is to generally play up to a woman's insecurities. DON'T make fun of them, be respectful, but just let them be aware of the fact, tactfully, that you KNOW that they arn't perfect, and given a different set of circumstances, if you so chose, you could be with someone else. The trick I have found that works for me is to ALWAYS KEEP THEM GUESSING. Does he like me, or doesn't he? Where do I stand? How can I win him over? Don't give them your undieing devotion to them right off the bat or they'll KNOW that you're a wussy!!! Okay, so here's my question. Could you tell me how to ask a girl out without "losing your power...?" It seems to me like once you have "put yourself out there", and asked her the question "Will you go out with me?" you have made yourself seem somewhat weak and wussy-like. Is the

Women: Perfect Your Oral Technique
Not sure where to start when it comes to oral? Don't worry - there are tried and tested techniques that are easy to learn. Read on to perfect your oral sex technique and make him smile. The lollypop This one is often used in porn films because it allows him to see exactly what’s going on. To fuel this fantasy, drop to your knees. (Depending on your heights, he might need to stand on something - you need good access to his testicles.) Lift his penis to expose his testicles, then find the line that runs between them (it’s a tiny ridge that’s often a darker colour). Find where this starts on the underside of his testicles, and that’s where your lollypop lick starts - continuing, very slowly, to the tip of his penis. Repeat the full-length licks (at least 10), then move into the 'classic'. The classic Use one hand to hold the base of the penis and let saliva pool in your mouth (your tongue needs to be nice and slippery). Make a loose fist with your other hand and slide it up

Women 30+ ...
This is for all you girls 30 years and over... And for those who are turning 30, and for those who are scared of moving into their 30's... AND for guys who are scared of girls over 30!!!!... This was a monologue by Andy Rooney from the CBS show, 60 Minutes Andy Rooney said: As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting. A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in whom she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 30 give a hoot what you might think about her or what she's doing. Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera

Women
Women are like apples: The best ones are at the top of the tree. Many men dont want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that arent as good, but easy . . . So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, theyre amazing They just have to wait for the right man to come along -- the one whos brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Id rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1. Im not going to change myself to fit into Your certain group 2. Always say you're sorry even if you dont understand what u did 3. No matter what dont talk to me about your ex-girlfriend 4. If you talk a big game be able to back that up 5. Dont say you got a big dick, because I'll asume otherwise 6. Stereo systems dont impress

Women
Yup, I got ya attention just by posting this as "women" didn't I? Ha ha ha, well it is my subject so bear with me. First, I congradulate the women I have met on LC. Yes, I have met many, and those I talk to I am glad to know. I bring this up as I sit here thinking about a stripper I met that wants some of my massuse services. I guess she was impressed with my hand abilities. Funny how she does not answer her phone now. Ya know, next time she sees me, I bet the questions shall arise. Why didn't I call? Why didn't we hook up? I personally would rather chat with a few certain women on LC than go meet this broad. And ya'll know who ya are. If ya don't know, ask me. Anyway, felt like rambling and no one to ramble too right now, since I talked to one person before typin this. Hope to chat with yas sonn. LAter.

Women And Men Rules...hmmmmmm
These are the rules that women say us men must live by! 1. The female always makes the rules. 2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification. 3. No male can possibly know all the rules. 4. If the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules. 5. The female is never wrong. 6. If the female is WRONG it is because of a flagrant mis- understanding which as a direct result of something the male did or said, wrong. 7. If rule 6 applies, the male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding. 8. The female can change her mind at any given point in time or place, or whenever deemed appropriate. 9. The male must never change his mind without express written consent from the female. 10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time, or about anything she wishes. 11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be angry o

Womens Prayer!!!
Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not too cheap. One who's handsome, smart and strong, One who's willy's thick and long. One who thinks before he speaks, When promises to call, doesn't wait a week. I pray that he is gainfully employed and when I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who will make love to my mind, knows what to say when I ask "How big's my behind?" One who'll make love till my body's a twitchin, in the hall, garden and the kitchen! I pray that this man will love me to no end and never attempt to shag my best friend. And as I kneel and pray by my bed, I look at this dickhead you sent me instead. Amen

Women In Nylons And Other Such Stuff
You know something? I like wearing nylons, but I'd rather see a sexy woman wearing them. Too many girls think that pantyhose & stockings are out of style, but most of us men think they're a great turn on. I love looking at women's legs. On that note, I don't have much of a sex life at home & kind of miss the old cyber days of old. If any lady would like to chat sometime, whether we have cybersex or not, my IM names are posted on my page. I like LC a lot & hope to spend more time here!

Women
fuck gurls who think there shit dont stink iam tired of playing ow iam a stripper u meet me that way shit life is to short but i cant complain cause iam in love with strripers dont mean i have to put up with there shit

Women Stay Safe
Call 77 YOU MUST KNOW *77 I knew about the red light on cars, but not the *77. It was about 1:00 p.m. in the afternoon, and Lauren was driving to visit a friend. An UNMARKED police car pulled up behind her and put his lights on. *Lauren's parents have always told them never to pull over for an unmarked car on the side of the road, but rather to wait until they get to a gas station, etc. * Lauren had actually listened to her parents advice, and promptly called *77 on her cell phone to tell the police dispatcher that she would not pull over right away. She proceeded to tell the dispatcher that there was an unmarked police car with a flashing red light on his rooftop behind her. The dispatcher checked to see if there were police cars where she was and there weren't, and he told her to keep driving, remain calm and that he had back up already on the way. Ten minutes later 4 cop cars surrounded her and the unmarked car behind her. One policeman went

~*. Women Terms .*~
1. Fine This is the word women use at the end of any argument when they feel they are right but can't stand to hear you argue any longer. It means that you should shut up. Incidentally, never use the word "fine" to describe how she looks. It will lead to one of the arguments mentioned above. 2. Five minutes These words actually mean half an hour. It is the equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the rubbish, so women feel that it's an even trade. 3. Nothing The word "nothing" means something and you should be on your guard immediately on hearing it uttered. It is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" is signal for an argument that will last "five minutes" and end with the word "fine". 4. Go Ahead (Raised eyebrow) Said in conjunction with raised eyebrows, it actually means the opposite. The words "go ahead" are not permission to do somethi

Women At The Age Of 30.
Saw this in a Bulletin, had to share lol for those of my friends who may not see it. Cheers to us women nearing and over the age of 30! We ROCK! (Thanks Devil) This is for all you girls 30 years and over... And for those who are turning 30, and for those who are scared of moving into their 30's... AND for guys who are scared of girls over 30!!!!... This was a monologue by Andy Rooney from the CBS show, 60 Minutes Andy Rooney said: As I grow in age, I value women who are over 30 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 30 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 30 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting. A woman over 30 knows herself well enough to be assured in whom she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the

Women Please Read This/guys Too
this was posted as a blog on a local bands myspace profile about a month ago~ > A woman at the nightclub Crobar on Saturday night > > was taken by 5 men, who according to hospital > > and police reports, gang raped her before dumping > > her. Unable to remember the events of the evening, > > tests later confirmed the repeat rapes along with > > traces of Rohypnol in her blood, with Progesterex, > > which is essentially a small sterilization pill. The > > drug now being used by rapists at parties to rape > > and sterilize their victims. Progesterex is available > > to vets to sterilize large animals. Rumor has it that > > Progesterex is being used together with Rohypnol, > > the date rape drug. As with Rohypnol, all they have > > to do is drop it into the girls drink. The girl can't > > remember a thing the next morning, of all that had > > taken place the night before. Progesterex, which > > dissolves in drinks just as easily, is such that the > >

Women Need To Shop
A woman was walking down the street when she was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner. The woman took out her wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some wine with it instead of dinner?" "No, I had to stop drinking years ago, the homeless woman replied. "Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?" the woman asked. "No, I don't waste time shopping, the homeless woman said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive." "Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?" the woman asked. "Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless woman. I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!" "Well," said the woman, I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my husband and myself tonight. The homeless woman was astounded. "Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that?