You might be a redneck if you think the last 4 words of the Star Spangled Banner is "Gentlemen, Start your engines" .
You might be a redneck if you've been on television more than 5 times describing what the tornado sounded like
You might be a redneck if you've ever financed a tattoo
You might be a redneck if you've ever made change in the offering plate
You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says "say no to crack" and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
You might be a redneck if you've been too drunk to fish
You might be a redneck if you've wallet and your dog are both on a chain
You might be a redneck if you go to the family reunion to meet women
You might be a redneck if you buy your wife earings that double as fishing lures
You might be a redneck if you mow the grass and find 3 cars.
You might be a redneck if you’ve been accused of lying through your tooth
You might be a redneck if you’ve ever worn a tube top to a funeral home
You might be a redneck if you’ve ever opened a beer during a eulogy
You might be a redneck if you’re dad’s cell number has nothing to do with a phone
You might be a redneck if you’ve ever ridden an electric floor buffer
You might be a redneck if you’ve ever used a bar stool as a walker
You might be a redneck if you think silence of the lambs is what happens when Larry walks out to the barn
You might be a redneck if you think fast food is hitting a deer at 65mph.
