durex would like to announce the release of their new condom, "the iranian" it holds seamen for 15 days. (only available in navy)
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2 irishmen r makin letter bombs. pat says,"mick do u think ive put enough explosives in this envelope". "i dont know says mick open it and see! "but it will explode says pat! mick says dont be fuckin stupid its not addressed to you!
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tom thumb,cinderella and quazi modo are sat talking tom said i bet im the smallest person in the world cinderella said i bet im the pretiest in the world quazi said i bet im the ugliest in the world so they went to the world records office to find out tom came out and said i am the smallest cinderella came out and said i am the pretiest quazi came out and said who the fucks andrew
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paddy was driving home pissed as a newt. suddenly he had to swerve 2 avoid a tree then another and another. a cop pulls him over as he swerves all over the road. paddy tells the cop all about the trees in the road. the cop says, " for fuck sake paddy thats your air freshner
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a 95 yr old man is given a jar 2 provide a sperm sample 4 analysis at hospital. he turns up 2 days later with the jar empty, nurse asks why no sample, he says sorry but i tried with my right hand then with my left! then my wife tried with both hands! then with her mouth, with her teeth in then without! then we got ethel from next door 2 try! but it was no good, we just couldnt get the fuckin lid off the jar
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friends are like bumcheeks shit comes between them but they always stick together.
