You ever envy those characters that get all of the juicy love scenes in a romance novel? Well I some advice on how to spice up a relationship. After reading this I don't think envy will be a part of it anymore, because there's no reason you can't write your own love scenes and live out your own fantasies with your partner.
Who said reality and fantasy don't mix? No one said you can't have the best of both worlds from time to time, right?
We all deserve to step away from ourselves and take a vacation from being us. Consider this one small thing you can do with your partner when you're both looking for a unique way on how to spice up your relationship and you want to add a little spice to your life.
I mean... just imagine writing a love scene. Putting all of your desires down on paper, centered around what you would like to happen in the scene. All of the fantasies you've had that you'd like to act out and then heading off to work, and having the excitement of coming home and encountering exactly what you wrote down on paper.
I doubt no matter what you encounter at work that day will compare to the thrill you'll have of knowing what awaits you when you get home?your very own juicy love scene.
Sound like fun? I bet!
Okay, great... now that I've gotten your attention. Let's talk a bit more about some things that I think will benefit you.
First, you might like to know how writing your own love scene could ever be of any use to you.
Well... consider if you have fantasies that you have yet to act out with your partner that this might be a great way to show him more about what excites you, as well as learn more about what excites him.
Maybe you've been with him for a certain number of years but your love life has gotten a little too routine for either of you to enjoy. Maybe it's even possible that both of you have some secret desires stashed away that you've never even told one another about.
Well, this gives you the opportunity to do so. You will be able to live out your fantasies while you explore one another in new ways you may not even know exists.
It could help you merge your worlds together and find new ways to rediscover one another intimately.
Living out the Fantasy
Before you get started there's one thing I'd like to mention. Now, this isn't really that big of a deal, but it's important enough to make or break the fantasy.
And what is that?
Boundaries.
They're an important part of respect. There are certain lines you won't cross and there are certain lines your partner won't cross.
If you're going to write a love scene, you're going to want to make certain it will fly with your spouse. To do this, I've come up with some suggestions that I think will help...
Talk it over before you even write your love scene. Find out what your spouse absolutely will not do. Under certain conditions, this is the less spontaneous route, but the easiest way to know what would be a no-go with your spouse is to ask. If you would like to keep the fact that you are writing your own love scene a secret, then you'll have to be a bit cheeky about it and beat around the bush. Use a movie from television or the cinema and bring it up as a conversation piece to find out what he considers to be a will-not-do. Then make a mental note of it and be certain not to include those things in your love scene.
Write a "safe" love scene. Test the waters. Write a safe love scene. Include everything in it that you're absolutely certain would not be a problem. Use it as a primer and once things are in play. You can then turn it up a notch when you write your next love scene and mention that if he reads anything in the next love scene that you write, that he doesn't feel comfortable doing, he can simply skip over it.
Write an alternate love scene. This is a good one if you just want a surprise landing. Write two love scenes. One which is the abridged version, the other the unabridged. The abridged version will be safe enough not to cross any boundaries that your husband may not like and then write an unabridged love scene, including the riskier details. He can then choose which one he wishes to act out with you. If he is not comfortable, he will be able to choose the abridged version, but if he's feeling a little dangerous... he may just go for the unabridged love scene. Now that we've talked about that let's talk about how spontaneity comes into play.
You may remember me saying above, that you may not want your husband to know you're writing a love scene, simply because you may feel discussing it could put a damper on the excitement.
And who can blame you? If you have a routine going, then adding in as much spontaneity as possible might be exactly what you need.
So writing a love scene that you give to him in which you have no idea when it's going to take place could be a complete high for you.
Who wouldn't find that exciting, right?
Right.
The Delivery
Now for the delivery. You may be wondering how you give him this love scene. Do you just hand it to him? Leave it on the table before he heads off to work one day... or maybe on the bed?
That is an idea, but I've got a few specific ideas in mind that might interest you and make it just a bit more exciting...
Get a lock box. Consider purchasing a box with a lock and key from your local store. Once you have it, put the letter in there and leave a note along with the key explaining to your husband you've got a nice surprise waiting for him when he opens the box. This is more beneficial on a long-term basis in terms of trading off, in which you could both have a key and check the box daily to see if any "love gifts" await you once you open the box. What makes it so fun is that you never know when there will be something in there.
Mail it to your home address. Consider putting the letter in the mail and addressing it to your husband at your home address. This is very advantageous if he gets home first and checks the mail. The thrill of it is that you won't know the exact day when the letter will arrive. To add more excitement to the fire... in the letter you may also wish to request that he gives you no indication that he has received it. That way he'll have time to create the right atmosphere over the next several days... and you can look forward to the thrill of not knowing exactly when your love scene will take place.
Use a P.O. Box. This is more convenient in terms of timing, spontaneity, and trade-offs. Similar to the lock box idea. The both of you could have a key to a P.O. Box and take turns sending one another exciting love letters (among other things). You could address the letter to the post office box and then he can check it whenever he has time. You won't know exactly when the love letter will arrive... and he'll have the excitement of waiting for it and then acting on everything mentioned in the letter. Then once he's fulfilled your fantasies, he can do the same thing in return. He'll be able to write his own love scene, mail it off... while you get the adventure of wondering what's going to take place in the letter and when it will arrive!
The Love Scene and How to Write It
You may have read an ample amount of love scenes in romance novels. Love scenes that were so well written, you'd swear you saw them on television.
Those love scenes may have even given you ideas on things you'd like to include in your own. But when it comes to writing style, obviously the love scene you write for yourself does not have to be as fluent or well-written.
It won't ever be published in a novel. Hopefully, the only other person who will ever receive it besides you, is your husband. So, there's no reason to get caught up on lingo, by trying to create a writing style that isn't natural to you. Be yourself. Remember you're talking to someone you love and trust.
It's most fun when you keep it simple. Of course, there are exciting ideas you might want to incorporate, that will help you out a bit, but that doesn't mean you have to take on a voice that isn't your own in order to do it.
Now that that's settled, let's talk about some things you may want to consider.
One thing that you may wish to consider when writing your love scene is whether this letter actually falls under romance or erotica. Erotica is a lot less tame in the sense of word usage, style, and how things take place in your love scene. It's all a matter of personal taste really and how you feel you and your partner will respond to it?which writing style appeals to the both of you most.
If you like it low key, then the romantic style of writing with words such as "make love" would be more beneficial to you. If you like it a bit more dangerous, riskier words that aren't generally exchanged in casual conversation would suit you best.
When it comes to setting, generally you may wish to have your love scene take place at your home. If you prefer a different setting, then you'll want to consider setting up the love scene, in which your husband (the hero) is written to contact you and ask if you could meet him at your desired location.
Also, if the love scene takes place at home, you may want to think about lighting as well. What you would like the lighting to be like. Is there music playing in the background?if so, what type of music is it and do you have it in your CD collection?
You may also wish to consider wardrobe. What you fantasize the both of you will be wearing. Now you may be tempted to jump the gun and have one or the both of you wearing nothing, but you will probably find it a lot more exciting when there is a little more effort involved when it comes to disrobing (hey, isn't that half the fun?).
Once you have the setting and wardrobe necessities down on paper, it is time to write the scene itself. You'll want to include every single detail that you feel is pertinent to creating a vivid love scene in order for your fantasy to take place. Also, some dialogue will most likely be in order.
Also, remember to include the background information for each of you: For instance, if role-playing is involved you may want to include what each of you do for a living. Just enough to set the scene and get the ball rolling. For instance, do you already know one another or is this some chance encounter with a stranger?
Once you have all of it down on paper, you may wish to stash it away and then return to it about a week later. Read over it with fresh eyes. See if there's anything else you would like to add. Or anything you would like to omit. Consider reading it out loud in order to make certain you're okay with everything that's in there.
Correct and change anything you feel sounds a bit clunky?smooth out those kinks and when you're ready... put it in an envelope, seal it with a kiss, send it off, and get ready to live out your fantasies!
