The thought for the day is - I'm young at heart, but old in the mind - I have issues getting along with my peers for somereason. It's a whole lot easier for me to talk to younger people, and older people. But a whole lot harder to talk to my peers. I think it might be due to that I compare myself with them. Almost like I'm always in competittion with them. Where are they at in their life, and where am I in mine? And how come they seem to be at a better or worse place? And I tend to think that same thing might be going through their head. ( Which it's probably not, but I get that weird feeling for somereason. ) It's strange and hard to explain. But throughout most my life, my good friends have always been either older or younger than me. It's hard for me to relate to people my same age often. Wich doesn't make a whole lot of sense when I think about it. It seems like I should have the most in common with my peers, and be able to relate to them rather easily. But I just don't....
Life is exhausting — Wednesday, 04 October 2006
Today I went to shcool and took a criminal justice test. I did ok, but I should have studied the last 2 chapters and reviewed some rather than drinking all that brandy.. Ohwell, we live and we learn.
I stopped by my mom's house after school. I talked to her for a while, atel lunch there, and got a card that I can get buy one thing get onother free as some food places. I'm hungry right now actually. I guesse my stepsister is on her way here or something. I got most of my stuff out of my mom's basemeant. ( wich wasn't fun cuz I can't breath dow there. ) Cuz there has to be room for my stepsister's stuff. Why is she coming? it's complicated and personal, so you don't get to hear about it. I will be rather happy if she shows up though. I rather like my stepsister. She was a close friend to me for a while when she was around.
My ankle hurts from moving all my stuff. I had to carry it upstairs, and then from my truck to my place in the basemeant. Then, my dad got home and had dressors, and computer speakers for me.. I uste to havem my room cleared out a little bit, now I have boxes and stuff all over it.Drawrs are good though. I can put clothes and stuff in them. And it should turn out ok. My dad, buys me stuff, on his own, and then says, " they were 40$, do you want to pay me for them now? " I did kinda need them, and for all he got, they weren't that much. But they ain't absolutly necesary. And I didn't ask him to go buy them for me. If I bring a pizza over to your house, and we eat it, and then I say, so you want to pay me for your half now, I'd probably get an odd look. He asked me that after I helped him cary it in my room too. I don't have much cash on me right now. I'm not an atm. LIfe doesn't work like that. It was an awkward situation. I appreciate people seeing stuff I need at a good price and gettting it for me. My dad is good for that, it's sort of a genetic thing. My brother saw something that reminded him of me the other day, a couple weeks a go or something and bought it for me. I do that when I see something I know my friends, or family will like. But I don't bring it to them, give it to them, and then say, so when yah gunna pay me for it?...
I don't often have people asking me for money like I owe them either. My only bill is my phone bill basicly. And lots of people owe ME money. Including my dad. Money wich he doesn't really have. I guess his interest is letting me stay here. But that also works out in his favor too. If you ever meet my dad, I highly suggest you don't make any deals with him, because it's like making one with the devil. I guesse the lesson is there's no such thing as something for nothing. It's a good thing to learn as a child I guess. But now it's somewhat annoying. He has a cover of being a " nice guy " who gets taken advantage of sometimes. HOwever, he often times gets taken advantage of due to his lack of judment in his quest for the great green god.
I feel bad for my roomate, cuz he doesn't have a standard lease. It's not a 6 month contract, or year, or anything. It's month by month. Which means my dad can do anything he wants with it, and put whatever late fees he feels apropriate at the time, raise it if he wants, have me move in and take the big room, all sorts of stuff that couldn't happen if they had a lease aggreement. Well here's the benifits of that though- brandon doesn't have to stay here if he doesn't want to, he can move out at anytime, ( assuming he has the money and time to move and a place to go ) my dad didn't charge last months rent or a security deposit for him to move in... My dad did this because he was doing it as a favor to a friend, and he couldn't wait to have that extra money each month.
It's a bad idea for both parties though. If brandon had paid a sercurity deposit, then when stuff happened, he wouldn't have to worry about it as much, it's allready been paid for. And my dad could have that sense of security too. Same with last months rent. Every once in a while brandon's mom stops by and brandon's not here. Obviously there's issues with my dad, and I just stay out of it. She asks about stuff, and I just have to say, - I stay out of it as much as possible. It's not my buisness, I'm not like my dad, I just live her cuz it's free rent. I don't agree with how my dad is, and I've tried to explain my philosify on stuff and why it's better, but that's all I can do. I'm not HIS daddy...
I basicly came back and fell asleep. I checked my internet stuff, and was talking to someone, but kinda just passed out. I don't have any easy food right now. I might make a sandwitch, or I might go to arby's. I have a chickin I need to cook. I think I'm gong to put it in a crockpot with some italian dressing and stuff and let it cook all day. That should work out, I just need to get around to doing it. I should have eaten before I went to sleep, but I was falling asleep while I was on my computer after moving the chest of drawrs in my room. ( I wonder how the reserves is going to feel about my ankle? lol )
It's hard juggling life and prioraties around with school. My math test and psyche tests are coming up again. I need to study for both of those, and start working on my paper for poliscience. It shouldn't be all that hard though. It only needs to be 4 pages double spaced. I write that much about every four days. lol. I just need to get the research, and sources and stuff. I also try to send some type of replyes to comments and stuff I get on my site and blogs. I kinda figure my blogs are kind of like writing to everyone at once. Some might see it as less personal, but my blogs are kinda personal.. So whatever. My life's an open book.
Some people make comments to me, about how I write so much and so many, that it fills up their inbox. But there' s people who put out a lot more than I do. And there's are article's they found, and quizes and stuff. And that's fine, whatever works for people. I'm just saying everythings relative I guess. I had around 31 new messages today. And lots of them were quizes, and stuff people didn't write themselves, and stuff I kinda skip over. I figure I'll go to their site and read them when I get bored. I may fill up your inboxes if you don't check them for a few days, but mine are almost always original. You ain't going to find stuff like it anywhere else most of the time. There are a few other people with similar thougths as me. If you visit my brother's site, you might see some similarities, but even then, it's different. Ya'll have a good night. I hope you enjoy my writing as much as I enjoy your comments on it.
