ASAYINGS:
All generalizations are false, including this one.
All I want is a warm bed, a kind word and unlimited power.
Always be sincere, even when you don't mean it. - Irene Peter
Always remember no matter where you go, there you are.
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
Ambition is the last refuge of the failure.
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
Angels can fly because they take themselves so lightly.
Any fool can criticize, condemn, & complain. And most do.
Any technology distinguishable from magic is insufficiently advanced.
Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening. - Pardo
Anything that is designed to do more than one thing can't do any of them well.
As I said before, I never repeat myself.
As long as I can remember, I've had amnesia.
As soon as the stewardess serves the coffee, the airline encounters turbulence.
Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
Better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. - Mae West
Bigamy : one husband too many. Monogamy : same thing.
Budget: A method for going broke methodically.
Bugs are Sons of Glitches!
Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Choose heaven for climate, hell for society.
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age 18. - Albert Einstein
Confusion not only reigns, it pours.
Constant change is here to stay.
Dain bramaged.
Demons are a Ghouls best Friend.
Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... till you can find a rock.
Do steam rollers really roll steam?
Do witches run spell checkers?
Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?
Don't be so open-minded your brains will fall out.
Don't look back, they might be gaining on you.
Don't Take Life Seriously, It Is Not Permanent.
Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.
Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system.
___ Dyslexics of the world, untie!
Efficiency takes time! Frugality: who can afford it?
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
Every morning is the dawn of a new error.
Every time I've built character, I've regretted it.
Everyone hates me because I'm paranoid.
Everyone is entitled to my opinion.
Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.
Exceptions always outnumber rules.
Exceptions prove the rule ... and wreck the budget.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. - Olivier
Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
Floggings will continue until morale improves.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.
Forgive your enemies...but REMEMBER THEIR NAMES!
Friends come and go, enemies accumulate.
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
Friendship is one soul in two bodies.
_____
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
Give your child mental blocks for Christmas.
Gravity doesn't exist. The Earth sucks.
Grow your own dope... plant a man.
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional!!
Gun control is being able to hit your target!
He who hesitates is probably right.
