Real People, Stupid Questions.
If blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear earmuffs? --Steven Wright
How old would you be if you didn't know how old you was? --Satchel Paige
Do you think that when they asked George Washington for ID that he just whipped out a quarter? --Steven Wright
Does an analyst have to be anal? --Adam Rifkin
Ever notice how irons have a setting for "permanent" press? I don't get it. --Steven Wright
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, does absolute powerlessness make you pure? --Harry Shearer
If a mime commits suicide, does he use a silencer? --Steven Wright
Why do ballet dancers dance on their toes? Why doesn't the company just hire taller dancers? --Fred Allen
If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet? --Steven Wright
If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex? --Art Hoppe
What happens if you get scared half to death,...twice? --Steven Wright
Why do people park in driveways and drive on parkways? --Larry Anderson
Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand? --Steven Wright
Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet? --Lily Tomlin
