John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the
rest of me life, between the legs of me beautiful wife!" That won him
the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night! He went home
and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the
night" She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?" John
said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside
me wife." "Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said. The next day,
Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner.
The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other
night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary." She said, "Aye, he told
me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there
twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I
had to pull him by the ears to make him come
