just thinking of the past. and trying to move on. just think of all i've done and all i haven't done. just wondering if anyone would miss me. I've been hurt so many times and by so many that i never let anyone to close. I never say what i mean . I have friends that love me and yet half of them will never know how much i love them. I've been close to my blood family but at the sametime an outsider looking in. to me life is way to short not to let people know what you think and feel. Yet so scared to let anyone in,then when i final do I always lose them one way or anothe. I had a dear friend on here who told me that i have been down way to much lately.He wasn't the only to say that of late. I also so know alot of my friends who care and love me don't know why.Well now you'll all get a peek at to why. I've been handed a second shot at life in more ways then one,i know i'm going to get my ass chewed by a few dear souls. for keeping something so big away from them. I've just got back from a crisis center,for trying to over does,i've also kicked smokeing . Why did I try these,because i just lost someone who was like a second mom to me,she did on sat.and my blood mom is dieing as we speak. and just not handleing it at all as well as moveing in my own place. so i haven't been shareing all of this with my dear souls because each and everyone of you have your own problems to handle right now. All I can say is that I hope you all can forgive me. I'll stop now before i cry again,and yes theres more but you'll not hear about it untill i'm ready to tell you. Sorry about that to,just the way I am.You don't have to like or love it,but thats just me.
