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My Life in 2008

2008 as it was for Me, good bad and ugly... Current mood: loved Category: Nostalgic Life Wow a year full of its ups and downs. I have to say for the most part I'm glad its over. A few major occurrences in '08 .....I got divorced (yay), turned 40, had major family conflicts and changes, lost friends, gained friends, made mistakes, hurt people, have been hurt, re-connected with family, and fell in love. Starting with my divorce, since the beginnings of it were in '07, it was finally final July 28, 2008, and I must say, that was one of the happiest days of my life. To be out of a marriage I should never have entered to begin with. I have no regrets on meeting Joe and becoming part of his kids lives, for that I will always be grateful. We should have never married, but that's neither here nor there. I love his children with all my heart, just as my own, and they still love me despite the fact that I'm not their "step-mom" anymore. The love of family does not know boundaries, its unconditional and pure, and I am blessed to have Kaitlin and Zach in my life, and of course Grace and Jacob! In March, I turned 40. My friends were with me for my birthday, and I had the best time. So far 40 has been good to me! I have embraced getting older, and love the fact that people look at me and say "there is NO WAY you are 40" ...LOL. My mothering skills were put to the test this year, and put in question by the one person who should never have questioned it, because she knew the kind of mother I was, and am. I made some mistakes, poor choices. We moved out of the house in the country into an apartment in the city, not the ideal place, but a stepping stone to our future. My job as a mother has never failed to be anything but great! This is the ONLY job I have ever embraced with my whole heart and given my all. My own mother had the audacity to put in question my skills as a mother. After a month or so of major turmoil, and her trying to turn my own son against me, much to her dismay, she only made the bond between him and I stronger. What she did do was judge me, which put her and I against each other, which had never happened before. My relationship with her, and her judgements, have strained our relationship. I proved her wrong, proved that I was a DAMN GOOD mother. And my children are proof of that! So if anyone is ever to question my mothering skills, you better be ready for a fight, or back the HELL OFF! I have made mistakes in this long year. People have gone from my life, and new ones have entered. I don't regret any of the mistakes, and no I wouldn't change anything, because I have grown so much due to them. I have hurt some people, and for this I am truly sorry. That was not my intention, I am not a mean spirited person, as my real friends know. I have also been hurt this year, but that is in the past now, and forgiven. Something I am thankful for looking at this year, is my reconnection with some old friends and family (Sandie), people I thought were long gone from my life. My niece and I have found each other, even though her mother and I may never be true sisters, considering the fact that we were never close to begin with, Sandie and I are close again, and that is a blessing. I have had several new friends come into my life this year, some closer than others but nonetheless, friends. And yes, some I have met through the internet, and they have become great friends. And the most exciting part of 2008 for me is falling in love (although the love began in late 2007). My boyfriend believes that everyone gets 3 true loves in life. Well I have found my 3rd in him. Yes I know, I have been married 3 times, how is he my 3rd love? Well, honestly I was only in true love with one of my husbands, my first one. The second I loved, but he was not what I would consider a true love, and the 3rd, well, we will just leave that one alone. I had one true love early in life, before my first marriage, so this does make Chris my third true love. Our love is so pure and amazing, I am truly blessed. We started out as just friends, we had alot in common, talked about any and everything for hours, venting, getting to know each other very well. Neither of us expected for our relationship to go beyond friendship, at least in the first months. But WOW have things changed. We are still best friends, but so much love is between us, that true honest and pure love that one dreams of. He has lit a fire in me that I didn't know could be rekindled after being afraid for so long. I had built up this wall so high that a mountain climber would have problems getting over it, but Chris tore it apart piece by piece, by loving me, trusting me, and showing me that true love doesn't have to hurt. He opened his heart to me, showed me his scars from past hurts, we shared so much about our pasts, and in getting to know how fragile his heart was, I tore down the wall he had built up as well. I know that our relationship was meant to be, and I'm glad our other relationships ended, if not for that we would not have found each other. I am proud to say that he has me, heart and soul. And I thank him for caring and loving me enough to break through all my barriers. After over a year of knowing each other, being best friends, and now loving each other whole heartedly...we are taking that next step and starting a life together. So 2009 is going to be the best year ever, we will finally be together, in body and soul. Chris is moving here in March, and we will finally be one. We just spent the weekend together, our sons have bonded, and his son loves me (yay), and both my children adore him. Without that, we couldn't be together. My kids rule my world, and without their support I could not go into any relationship, or there would be hard feelings. So I am thankful that there are no problems with that! I am finally happy. In my life I have had many goods and bads, many times where I just wanted to quit, say stop the world, I just wanna get off. And several of those times have been this year. But I have overcome the adversity that life threw in my path, and become a better person because of it. I only want to move on from here, and enjoy 2009 to the fullest, with the love of my life Chris. Look for some exciting news on or around July 29, 2009!! = ]
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My Life in 2008

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