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I am extremely frustrated at the most recent turn of events. 

Leading up to this, I'll update some from the last 2 1/2 years or so. Nikki lost custody of both children about 3 years ago, give or take. She was proven unfit by the State of WV (yes, they did their jobs this time around). The State took away her custodial rights for Grace and Jacob. Thank the Lord for this miracle!! She cried a river, used drugs as her bridge, and got over it. Rather quickly, I might add. A day in the life of a junkie. She was in and out (mostly out) of rehabs/clinics/private Christian detox homes more times than I can account for the last few years. She says she was clean for over a year, nothing at all....come to find out it was more like 3 months, but she was still smoking MJ to get her through so she wouldn't crave the heroin as much. All of her needle drug use led to her Lupus coming out of remission and making her very ill. She had Nephritis in one kidney, almost losing it. She also had a severe infection in the hip joint, requiring surgery twice to remove the infected tissue. A day in the life of a needle junkie. She had RA as a child, and it came out of remission as well, see what happens when you shoot up and basically "kill" your immune system? So, RA, Lupus, almost losing a Kidney, 2 surgeries on hip, as well as dealing with detoxing while in the hospital for these health issues...I would think that would make a person change her lifestyle. Guess I'm not a junkie, so my thoughts are pretty far off the mark. Finding out through reading her journals over the past couple years, I found out she was never truly clean at all, even while in the Detox unit, she had a friend sneaking her in pills, thus getting her kicked out instead of signing herself out like she said because "God spoke to her and healed her." Not saying that it can't happen that way at all, I'm a believer. But in this case, it was too good to be true. All the hoping and praying that her mother and I have done, as well as her grandparents and her sister, she to this day, is still a using addict. Although it's not heroin, she is using MJ, taking LSD when she can get it, as well as any pill she can crush and snort. All this within the last 2 weeks, part of it at my home with my knowledge. She has lived back up here since June of this year, with her mother and step-father. From that time, she was to be in therapy and was going daily to the Methadone Clinic to get her daily dose, to curb her cravings and since it has an Opiate blocker in it, it would make her violently ill if she did use any Opiate. The Dr kept upping her dose, God only know why, to the point she would get the little high from it, then come crashing down and nod off in mid sentence. Ok what good is that if she can't function? None. So from there she went to a different Dr at the clinic and got on Suboxon, which has less side effects, but works the same for the most part, just not giving her the high she had before on the Methadone. Well, smart girl that she is, now at the ripe old age of 25, she decides that not taking the full dose of Suboxon is fine for her, she doesnt need it all, so she would take maybe a quarter of a pill daily. So of course she had leftover pills. What would an addict do with pills? hmmm...yep you guessed it. She sold them for money to buy other drugs or traded them for MJ. So, now that all of this has come to a head, she no longer has access to this medicine, the doctor is being contacted tomorrow, letting him know that she left town. 

So, the last week and a half...Nikki has been living with me. She and her mom were having problems, so I took her in, partially to give her a roof, but mostly to gather info about her drug usage for her mother, since Nik confided quite a bit in me "because mom just doesn't understand" ....good thing I have the ability (IF needed) to bullshit (vulnerable) people into trusting me. Not a trait I'm proud of, and have only used it to serve a purpose such as helping someone in trouble, as in this case. Anyway, back to her. Knowing she would eventually screw up, and get caught in her own web of lies, I let her have a little freedom to come and go, as long as she made her meetings 2x a week as scheduled...she had no problem with this knowing if she didn't she wouldn't be getting her Suboxon to sell. She went to her meetings most nights after smoking MJ. At the clinic the urine test once weekly, can twice if they feel the need. Random, so can be either night she goes. The only thing they don't complain about being in any of the addicts system is THC, from MJ. This drug levels them out and supposedly keeps them from usining something harder, so with this they are ok. Hmm, odd to you, it is to me. The are an addiction specializing clinic..shouldn't ALL drugs be against their rules? Just a thought. 

Well, Nikki had been grinding on my last never basicially since she got here..I know, it was only about 8 days or so, but enough is enough, when even my daughter says, "Mom, this crap is getting old, can she leave now?!" She is a very intuitive 12 year old. I had been setting up Nikki for a fall, even though she would have in some other way on her own, it didn't fit my time frame. Knowing she was still using misc drugs, I wanted her out of the house and away from my own children ASAP. I found out she had been stealing from me, money, clothes, shoes, underwear out of the dryer (who does that?) lingerie (again, who), stealing clothes and such from my daughter as well. I don't like a thief. The final straw came when she found my HIDDEN prescription bottle of my anxiety medicine and stole a few of those, didn't think I would notice ( I counted them for a reason). She left the house Friday evening to go to the Church for her son's Play. Knowing she was going to be a while, I searched the room in which she kept her things, within my house. Finding many things that belonged to myself and my daughter. Also finding journals that had vital information that will keep her from EVER regaining any type of custody of her children. These precious babies (now 6 1/2 and 3) deserve way better than she could or has ever offered them. My granddaughter, the oldest, is being raised by her father, the best place she could be. My grandson is being raised by Nikki's mother, and that is the best for him. They are both thriving so well without her in their lives. She has burned the last bridge when it comes to her children. Proven over and over for the last 6 years that drugs are more important to her. Don't cry and blame others for losing your children when you have the nerve to stick a needle in your arm for your fix. Kill yourself, but don't bring your children down that road with you. It is now a final chapter, after all this time. She had gotten to spend time with both of her children supervised, and now she will most likely not see them again for a very long time. Her mother and I are both praying that she hits rock bottom this time around, and that will only happen if she gets arrested. The one thing she has never done is get caught. It's only a matter of time. 

***This is just a little info on what's been going on, without going into too much depth at the moment. Kelly, this is what you and I have been discussing for years now, so here is your update. A few Fu friends know what I've been dealing with for years now, and have supported me. Thank you for that, and much love. 


****I'll be updating this soon Im sure, keeping everyone posted on the situation.

Well....its been a while since I have updated, so here goes nothing. Nikki, after 5 1/2 months still does not have her kids, and only has SUPERVISED visitation once a week @ the DHHR office. THANK GOD!!! She is being drug tested 2x a week, and the last one came back dirty!! Marijuana, Heroin and Codeine.... her mom bitched her out and she said " because I don't have my kids, I have to cope some way" ....OMFG can you believe that??? That is the REASON she doesn't have them!! The next hearing is on October 2nd, I plan on being there and will keep all of you that know and love me updated. But as of now, according to the case worker, Nikki will NOT be getting her kids back this time (the 6 month hearing) and it doesn't look good for her to get them back at all. After this hearing, the judge can give her 3 months extra to show improvement....IF he has seen improvement thus far, which he has not. So, we will see what happens. The only thing she did, and waited until last week to do...is get a job! But guess what?? Its at a store that sells tobacco products and you guessed it... BONGS, PIPES and other paraphenelia....so yeah...NOT looking good for her to ever get custody of HER OWN CHILDREN!! I AM SOOO GLAD I MADE THE PHONE CALL WHEN I DID. PLEASE, KEEP NIKKI'S MOTHER AND I BOTH IN YOUR PRAYERS, AS WELL AS GRACE (3 1/2) AND JACOB (7 mths)...WE NEED ALL WE CAN GET!! THANKS.... :*( Any thoughts or comments always welcome! HYPNOTIQ
Well today was a day in the record books....The CPS did their job for one thing, and shocked us all. They actually decided to keep the kids away from their mother, my stupid dope head step daughter...good decision. The Child Protective Services decided that the children needed to stay where they are for the next month AT LEAST, which means the baby, 3 month old Jacob will stay with Nikki's mom and the 3 year old will be living with her father. He isn't my number one choice as a guardian for her (I am of course, I have taken care of her for over 1.5 of her 3 yrs), but he is better than the alternative, which would be Nikki getting her back. Little Grace is traumatized right now, she saw a stabbing and her mother being beaten, the last thing she needs is to be in her mother's care...and I am using the word "mother" very lightly considering she has never been much of one to either of her children. What has upset me the most today is that after all I have done for Nikki, she completely turned her back on me, basically doesn't want me in her life....why you ask? Because I told her the damn truth, and she didn't want to hear it! I let her know that the reason she lost her kids is HER OWN FAULT, THAT IF SHE HAD STAYED CLEAN AND NOT BEEN EXPOSING HER KIDS TO DRUGS AND DEALING, SHE WOULD STILL HAVE THEM!!!! Anyway, not dwelling on her being a bratty little bitch today, just updating all of you that care about me and my grandkiddies!! ILU my friends, and please keep praying for their safety!!
Well, the CPS finally made a decision as to what was going to happen to my grandchildren. It has taken them since Friday evening to figure out how to their heads out of their asses. And by the looks of things, they didn't do a very good job at that. My conclusion is that the "CHILD PROTECTIVE SERVICE" is one of the biggest OXYMORONS there ever was. Both of the children have been taken into state custody. My granddaughter, the one I had, left me tonite to go to live with her father, who didn't even have visitation rights to her due to past neglect. Yeah, just a little fucked up huh? And the baby, the one with the cocaine in his little tiny body, is living with Nikki's mother for the time being. Nikki is to have NO contact WHATSOEVER with the children. The court date has not yet been set, so when that happens I will post more. The sad thing is that Nikki cared more about getting her POS BF out of jail, which he made bail today thanks to her druggie friends, and never even called to check on her children... That shows you where her priorities lie...and not with her children, never have, and she will probably never change. Twenty-two years old, and has lost the most precious gifts from God, and she caused it all to happen.
Well the baby is doing well, the cocaine is out of his little system, he is expected to be fine. I had to take my 3 year old granddaughter to the ER Sunday night for a CPS ordered drug test, because I let them know that she was exposed to the same conditions that her baby brother was. THANK GOD ABOVE THAT SHE WAS NEGATIVE FOR ALL DRUGS!!!! But thats not say that it hadn't already gotten out of her system...but no proof either way. So now we are awaiting word from the so-called CPS to get together with the judge to determine custody of these children...what judge in their right mind would give these kids back to their mother, who exposed them to this shit?? But that is an option, they like to see mothers with their children...what kinda mother lets her babies get exposed to coke n other drugs??? She may actually lie her way outta this shit and get her kids back today...WTFFFFF??? If that doesn't happen, then my step-daughters mother and I will share custody of the children most likely, meaning I will keep the 3 year old and she will keep the baby. The mother is more interested in trying to make bail for her POS bf than even checking on her babies. She can't make bail for him and I told her that he should rot in their for what he has put her and these children through. She calls to ask me for money to help get him out of jail but doesn't even ask about her daughter...so does she even deserve to have them back?? Please pray that the court decides she is unfit and doesn't let her have these kids back anytime soon. She obviously needs to go through rehab, yet again and really she needs to be in jail for neglect...maybe just maybe that will open her eyes to what she has done to her children. ANY COMMENTS AND/OR ADVICE WELCOME....AND PRAYERS NEEDED!!!! ILU MY FRIENDS~!!
This started out being a mumm, asking a question, but was too long n drawn out to post so I am blogging. This is the deal...someone involved with my family was in a fight today, and ended up knifing someone else, and didn't really care, he was layin on the couch, like any other day. My grandchildren witnessed this fight, as did my step daughter. Well this person is around my grandchildren all the time and brought the knife into the house with blood on it, where my grandchildren live. So as I was leaving with my granddaughter I called 911 and let them know what happened, they already had cops on the scene, I stopped by and talked to them, gave them details that I knew. Well subsequently he was arrested and the police searched the house, found the knife, and drugs. My step daughter's mother took the baby, 3 months old mind you, to the ER because he was very irritable, and inconsolable. He is being kept for observation overnight. They ran a blood n urine test on him, and come to find out he tested POSITIVE FOR COCAINE in his system....and his mom is nursing him, so she is obviously doing coke. AND she has the NERVE to be pissed at her mom and me because we have the kids!!! CPS is involved now, and they won't let her have her kids back until they investigate. So this is how my day has been....I will keep ya'll updated, but please pray for these children!!! ANY COMMENTS OR HELPFUL ADVICE IS APPRECIATED!!!!
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