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lestat's blog: "mines"

created on 04/26/2007  |  http://fubar.com/mines/b77542

my life

my life is so depressing and i cant figure y all i know is that something is stopping me no matter which way i go, it aint like i really got any good going for me, i dont have friends around i have no gal, and i dont live whee i wanna live cuz of work, its so depressing to be some where and know no one whats life turning into when u aint got anyone

new orleans

NoLa New Orleans. How wonderful those words sound when said with no quirky emphasis on odd syllables. They always seem to elicit some response. Have you been there? Have you ever been to Cafe Du Monde for beignets and cafe au lait? Have you ever sat for hours in the piano bar at Pat O'Brien's sipping hurricanes? Have you ever been to Mardi Gras - Bacchus? Endymion? Rex? Have you ever had oysters at the Acme House? Have you ever sat out on the "fly" eating crawfish and drinking Dixie beer? Have you ever sung karaoke at Cat's Meow? Do you know who John Folse is? Have you ever risen at 6am to roam the streets of a "quiet" French Quarter? Have you ever been to Galatoire's? K-Paul's? Emeril's? Can you remember when Zulu threw gold-painted coconuts? Have you ever ridden the street-car down St.Charles Avenue secretly sipping a daiquiri? Have you ever had a mint julep on the porch of The Columns Hotel? Have you ever been to Audubon Park? City Park? Have you ever been to mass at the St. Louis Cathedral? Do you know who Harry Connick, Sr is? Have you ever had breakfast at Brennan's? Have you ever been to the original Tipitina's? Have you ever been to the Superdome?Saint's game? Sugar Bowl? Super Bowl? Final Four? Have you ever had cheese fries at Fat Harry's? Thrown peanuts on the floor at O'Henry's? Have you ever been to the Rendon Inn? Can you remember the New Orleans World's Fair? Have you ever been to the campuses of Tulane and Loyola? Have you been to a crawfish boil? Sucked the heads? Have you ever been "on the lake"? "Across the lake"? To the "west bank"? Have you had a Ferdi from Mother's and wondered what "debris" was? Have you ever been an unexpected invitee to a jazz funeral? Have you ever been to Jazzfest ---- first or second weekend? Have you ever been to Pontchartrain Beach? Have you ever stood in line at the Camellia Grill? Had a po-boy at Uglesich's? Oyster and artichoke soup at Mandina's? BBQ shrimp at Pascal Manale's? Gumbo at Dookie Chase? Have you ever been to a plantation home? Have you ever been to the French Quarter festival? Can you pronounce Tchoupitoulas? Thibodaux? Boutte? Have you ever been to Clancy's? The Upperline? Brightsen's? Have you ever been to the Biloxi beaches? Have you ever had a monsoon at Port of Call? Breakfast at the Blue Bird? Have you ever seen the Neville Brothers? Cowboy Mouth? The Radiators? Have you ever been to New Orleans? If you've been there, undoubtedly one of these things found its way to your itinerary. You probably also saw the dirty streets, the tired shotgun houses, and cracked sidewalks. You've heard about the high crime, poor public schools, poverty, and racism. And yes, there are many housing projects. It is very hot in the summer, people are generally overweight, and the city is always a hurricane away from being flooded. Each visitor chooses to see the New Orleans the way they want to see it. Luckily, New Orleans has the amazing ability to win over many more than it loses. It can cause one to see the big oaks hovering over St. Charles and not the trash on the sidewalks. It can cause one to focus on the street musician and not the street beggar. It can cause one to see the wrought iron balcony rather than the dilapidated building. What is it about the Big Easy that makes most see the positive and not the negative? The answer to New Orleans' allure may, on the surface, seem different for locals and tourists but I suspect that there is a common thread - the people, the heart and soul of New Orleans. There is a culture and tradition in New Orleans that is sweet and simple. No need to over analyze this. It recognizes that the enjoyment of family and life is as attainable for the poor as it is for the rich. A hand on a shoulder and touch on the arm is just the way we say hello. We know that good music, food, and drink is made all the better when surrounded by friends who share the same outlook. When it is your way of life, when it is woven into your circle of friends, social gatherings aren't seen as "excesses" but as something you just do. New Orleanians don't believe they've cornered the market on this way of life. They recognize it when they see it elsewhere and they applaud it. What makes New Orleans special is that they have a concentration of people who have it and foster it. It's generational. It's hereditary. The challenge to New Orleans, to the New Orleanian, is as great as ever. Its reputation temporarily tarnished by the things that occurred in the aftermath of Katrina, it is up to those who live there, have been there, and adopted this city to not let these terrible scenes replace the ones they have of the Big Easy. While money is needed to rebuild, preserving that feeling and attitude that New Orleans gave you on that last visit is just as important. Did the flood waters wash away the New Orleans way of life? Not a chance. Not a chance that New Orleanians would deprive future generations of this breeding ground of the good life. With the vast destruction of parts of New Orleans now clear, the question is being asked repeatedly, "Is New Orleans worth rebuilding?" To that, I can only reply, "Have you ever been to New Orleans?" To end, here is a quote from the Times-Picayune newspaper" We dance when there is no music, We drink at funerals. We talk too much, and live too large and, frankly, we're suspicious of others who don't...When you meet us now and you look into our eyes, you will see the saddest story ever told. Our hearts are broken into a thousand pieces. But don't pity us, we're gonna make it. After all, we've been rooting for the Saints for 35 years. Thats got to count for something." -Chris Rose, Times-Picayune Columnist, New Orleans

what else is in my head

ok today i realize how depressing it is to be away from home, im in some hole in the wall place in mississippi and only been here for 3 weeks and its driving me nuts there is bearly and women here, and there is nothing to do, this is the most depressed i have ever been, i feel as if my life is nothing or i am a puppet and they are pulling my strings just enough to keep me alive and nothing else im lsing out on so much happiness and for what to help someone, but knowing that im helping someone is not satifying me any more what is there to do
look they have plenty of people you hear about in school and threw out life that were called great but do all these people know what the fuck they were talking about. like for instance if there is a god then why the fuck do all these bad things happen, have you ever heard the term it is better to have loved and lost then to never loved at all what the fuck he must have never loved, have you ever heard of no pain no gain that all depends on how much pain your body can handle so how much is to much, some people like pain it makes them feel better, and whyare people scared to die what the fuck does any one know what really happens when you die, you know there is a lot of shit people say and do but who is to say it should be in our history, taught to our children, or even to be said to be right or wrong, no matter what we do someone is always trying to control us. does anyone get any of this shit

me against the world

whats the deal, i work, i play, and now one cares, i try to do things but the world won't let me, i push, claw, fight, kick and punch, to get to the top and the mountain and all the obsticals just keep getting bigger, everyone wants to be there but never are, why did life become so hard, once i grew everything hit, why not over time but all at once, what is it, am i not liked, did i do wrong, i know i made it this way but why wasn't i stopped, did anyone care were i was going, or did they jsut wnat to watch the show, so tell me why are you all against me, when i think you got my back you look away take a step back and then watch the show, if i was perfect would you like me am i really that bad of a person, do i push you away, or are you scared to tell me i want to know, i need to know, i have to know

y is it

every night i lay down to go to sleep things run threw my head till finally the walls start cloing in and i fall into a slumber, why is it it only at night the things you don't worry about during the day just pour into your head to fuck with you, why is it that when you think your all good your not, why is it that no matter what i do i can not kepp the toughts out, why is it if something doesn't happen soon the voices will take over, how do you stop them, why are they there, why wont they leave, tell me, tell me whats wrong with me, tell me the truth, why is it every time i crack open a beer the thoughts come back, why is it when ever i'm not busy the thought are there, why is it some are cursed and others aren't, why is it, why is it, that evry chance to do something something else comes along and fucks it up, why is it that all the trust i have ever had has ran off and i can't find it, why is it that what i want i can't have, why is it when you have a picnic it always rains, why is it when you have no weres to go you can't find something to do, why is it that our lives seem so different when we are so close, why is it, when we get up in the morning we are always on the go, why is it that when you have everything something happens and it all disappears, why is it that there is never a simple solution to the problems you are having but their is a simple solution to others that you give, why is it you know what you want and others want but you don,t show it,why is it that this world is so judgemental that we are scared to do and say as we please, why is it that this will never end, the problem is i have to stop now

what if?

what if What if? What if everything you knew was a lie? What if life was planned out for you by some untold element? What if you learned nothing what would you think? What if what you thought was real was not? What if you found out something that you never knew and it slowly eat away at you? What if you knew something that no one else did but you think they do so you never say a word? What if you woke up one day and the whole world was different? What if you were me and i were you? What if you did something that might change the world but you never knew? What if you never knew you fucked up but you did? What if you didn't wake up and slept your entire life? What if you loved someone and never told them and they loved you back? What if something happened to you and no one evr noticed? What if! What if this is the most compleceted question of all time? What if! What if! Just think about it!!!

on my mind

well this is whats in my head i dont know much anymore cuz i figure everytinme i learn something there is something else to be learned, and its like u think u know someone but u really dont what the hell y do people change so much, i just wanted to make my 1st blg on here but i dont want to get to deep on anyone who will read this not for my first one lol
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