Lemon juice
Scenario: I had ordered a curry and was dishing up with the help of Him. There were only a few slices of lemon that had come with the meal and we both liked it over our curries. He was complaining that his dish was hot, he had been eating it with his fingers and then he came to squish the lemon juice over the meal ….
Him: Fucking hell this curry is hot !!!
Me: Man-up, it ain’t as hot as mine !!
Him: {squeezing lemon juice over meal} …. Ouch, it hurts !!!
Me: Just squeeze it out and get it over and done with.
Him: {In pathetic whiney voice} ….. I am. It is stinging my fingers though.
Me: *Rolls eyes* …… poor baby !!!
Him: *completes task*
Me: You do realise there is a bottle of lemon juice in the fridge ??
Him: OUCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
{5 minutes later}
Him: I hate you !!!!
Me: LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!