ok, my mom just found out like a few days ago that my ex bf's mom (my sis's new best friend's mom cuz my ex bf has a younger sis my sis's age) is wiccan cuz julia (my sis's friend) invited my sis to a retreat thing the family does/goes to. julia i guess had given my sis a magazine about wat they do and it said something like "the earth's religion" or something and my mom read it in a disgusted tone. i asked wat it was and she showed me. we got into a discussion (sorta) and she told me that maria had said that julia's mom was a witch. it was the way she said it tho...she said it as if she hated them and like she would excommunicate anyone who was a wiccan. i turned around and said "ooo and u follow jesus who's dead!" we dropped it until the next day.
the next day i asked wat my mom had decided and she said julia was sleeping over all weekend (whee...?) and i said that was cool. mom said that julia seemed like a nice girl even tho her mom was a witch. it's the way she doesnt even KNOW about wicca and yet she sneers the name as if it's the worst thing ever! i almost yelled at her right there but instead i started a fight about how catholicism is one of the most corrupt religions out there while mom tried to defend it and my dad basically agreed wit me (they were both raised in catholic schools). she turned it into a college thing and picked a fight about how i wont have anything done and how i was puttin up a fight about everything and how she might have to move out until it was all over (WTF?!). my dad got pissed off and they both yelled bak and forth until my mom conceded and went to go check the laundry.
i dont have the guts to tell people i'm wiccan. i'v heard the tone in my mom's voice when she calls us "witch" instead of "wiccan". once in my justice seminar, janice said pentacles were associated wit satanism and i raised my hand and corrected her. "pentacles point upwards and pentagrams point downwards" and all wat she could do was look at me as if she didnt know me anymore and say "uh...i didnt know there was a difference...". i thought i could feel myself blush as everyone looked at me as if i was poisonous. this girl that sat next to me switched to the other side of the room the next day. my ex and me told my friend reese and her bf marshall that we'r wiccans and she didnt believe us. she even asked me the next day if i was serious and i said i was. she just said "cool" and changed topic.
i had to tell reese not to tell anyone cuz i KNOW people will avoid me more than they already do. i KNOW people will go home and tell their parents and their parents might forbid them from talkin to me. my mom thinks wicca is wierd only cuz she doesnt understand it...but it means i cant be myself around her. if you cant b urself at home, then ur living a lie. i have to lie to everyone and say i'm christian when i dont believe in jesus or one god...neither of them were there when i needed them the most. but me being wiccan doesnt change who i am...
...does it?
