Jonathan's blog: "Sports"

Dave was so excited to be going bear hunting. He spotted a small brown bear and shot it. Then there was a tap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a big black bear. The black bear said "You've got two choices. I either maul you to death or we have sex."

Dave decided to bend over. Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Dave soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip where he found the black bear and shot it. There was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him. The grizzly said "That was a huge mistake, Dave. You've got two choices. Either I maul you to death or we have rough sex."

Again, Dave thought it was better to comply. Although he survived, it would take several months before Dave finally recovered.

Outraged, he headed back to the woods, managed to track down the grizzly and shot it. He felt sweet revenge, but then there was a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to find a giant polar bear standing there. The polar bear said "Admit it Dave, you don't come here for the hunting do you?"