A guy walks into the local unemployment office for his weekly check. He marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi. You know, I just HATE coming in here drawing welfare week after week I'd really much rather have a job."
The worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent we've just obtained a job opening from a very wealthy old man who needs a combination chauffeur-bodyguard to drive his nymphomaniac daughter.
You'll be required to drive his Mercedes, he'll supply all of the necessary clothes. Because of the long hours, all your meals will be provided. In addition, you will be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips.
A two-bedroom apartment above the garage comes with the position. The starting salary is $200,000 a year."
The guy says, "You're bullshitting me!"
The social worker says, "Yeah, well, you started it."