Momma Cas's blog: "cassandra of troy"

HAHAHA!!! I am now married and loving my hubby so much! It is taking some getting used to the fact that I am now a Mrs. and I HATE the fact that we still have to live separately. He's at Granpa's house (which will be his when Granpa goes the way of all the earth) and I am living with Momma and Daddy (my in-laws). Contrary to popular belief, I have no probs living with parents, I just hate having to figure out ways to share Billy Bob with Granpa. Oh, well, it will all work out in the end.

i am getting married on mondya and finally getting excited about it - i am no longer freaking out. it will be fine or momma and daddy will start kicking ppl out of our yard - i am going to have a great wedding!!! i will be beautiful (and really pregnant) and billy and i will start our new life together and be happy!!! and fuck the whole world if it thinks we wont!

well, after sitting down and realizing there would be 50+ people at my wedding when i wanted a small function, today i flipped shit and broke down a bit. so i took my marriage plans into my own two hands and grabbed the phone. i dis-invited everyone, but under 15 family and very, very close friends and pissed off some people, but I DONT CARE. i have dealt with too much shit in the past month and a half due to this pregnancy to worry about what everybody else thinks. i have spent my whole entire life trying to be kind to my friends and forfeit my own wishes, well newsflash!!! this is my damn wedding and i will have it whatever way i want and however will make ME comfortable and happy! for once in my life i am going to be selfish as hell. i will have a soft goth wedding with no one to stand up with me and billy, i will be me and billy and the preacher and everyoneelse can sit back and watch buit stay the hell out of it - i want a quiet wedding with immediate family and to hell with what everyone thinks. who's wedding is this anyhow? mine and billy's? or all my friends, or so-called friends who feel jilted over this. be happy for us or shut the hell up! P.S. im sorry to everyone who this doesnt apply to, thank you for letting me vent

well, today has actually been a really good day health wise. i have not had but one prob with morning sickness, i have kept down all my food, i have been tired but not totally drained and i am going to see my fiance in a little while. with our marriage coming up fast, on march 12th, i thought i would be the last person to have cold feet - yet i realize i have been engaged 4 time previously in my search for Mr. (or Ms.) Right and now that i found him in billy bob, it is weird and a bit scary. after all preveously i was always a bridesmaid, never a bride. not so this time around, but i am excited. nervous but excited and happy for this beginning with my billy.