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wedding breakdown

well, after sitting down and realizing there would be 50+ people at my wedding when i wanted a small function, today i flipped shit and broke down a bit. so i took my marriage plans into my own two hands and grabbed the phone. i dis-invited everyone, but under 15 family and very, very close friends and pissed off some people, but I DONT CARE. i have dealt with too much shit in the past month and a half due to this pregnancy to worry about what everybody else thinks. i have spent my whole entire life trying to be kind to my friends and forfeit my own wishes, well newsflash!!! this is my damn wedding and i will have it whatever way i want and however will make ME comfortable and happy! for once in my life i am going to be selfish as hell. i will have a soft goth wedding with no one to stand up with me and billy, i will be me and billy and the preacher and everyoneelse can sit back and watch buit stay the hell out of it - i want a quiet wedding with immediate family and to hell with what everyone thinks. who's wedding is this anyhow? mine and billy's? or all my friends, or so-called friends who feel jilted over this. be happy for us or shut the hell up! P.S. im sorry to everyone who this doesnt apply to, thank you for letting me vent
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